Feminist Lady | David Jolly | Ep 49

[00:00:00]In the beginning of the episode, we've been starting it with like a fake dramatization because people always skip that part. Yeah.

[00:00:07]>> And I have to plug my dates.

[00:00:09]>> So, I'm trying to think of something we could do where it opens on us, but we're like it's fake drama.

[00:00:16]>> You know, you know how podcast will cut like you open it and you see uh something that happened later in the episode.

[00:00:23]>> What can we say something about like sports or >> Yeah. Like what do you mean >> like the lake man? Forget the Lakers, man. The I hate the Lak I've been hating the Lakers since they took Shaq from Orlando.

[00:00:36]>> Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Let's riff on that.

[00:00:38]>> Yeah.

[00:00:38]>> Oh, jump in. Yeah.

[00:00:40]>> Yeah, man. I hate the Lakers. I don't care if I'm in LA or how nobody from LA feel since the LA Lakers took Shaquille O'Neal from the Orlando Magic. Screw the Lakers.

[00:00:51]>> You're preaching to the choir.

[00:00:52]>> You know, you hate the Lakers, too.

[00:00:54]>> Lakers, Dodgers. Don't even get me Dodgers. Uh, screw all LA sports.

[00:01:00]>> Now that I have your attention, I'll be going to uh Joshua Tree, California, Denver, Nashville. I'll be in Florida doing all sorts of cities there. Check out my dates, jetsky johnson.com. Um, but you actually like the Lakers.

[00:01:12]>> No.

[00:01:18][music] >> Somebody said it's like the first 15 minutes that you want to kind of be clean.

[00:01:27]>> Okay. Okay. Then after that, you could kind of get loosey goosey.

[00:01:30]>> Okay. So, just wait for 15 minutes.

[00:01:32]>> Yeah, cuz I mean if you monetize cuz you monetize, right?

[00:01:34]>> Oh, we monetize.

[00:01:36]>> You better believe it.

[00:01:37]>> Where's my monle? [laughter] >> Oh, you got like one of the little eye things.

[00:01:40]>> I got a I got a top hat.

[00:01:43]>> Oh, we monetize. [laughter] >> You better believe it. Like like the Monopoly man.

[00:01:47]>> You ever wear a top hat?

[00:01:49]>> Yeah.

[00:01:49]>> Yeah. When you said that so confident.

[00:01:52]>> I had a top hat on in a sketch recently.

[00:01:56]It ain't come out. Didn't I? Cuz we got a top hat at Jake house where we record everything.

[00:02:01]>> Yeah.

[00:02:01]>> I'm trying to think. What did I wear?

[00:02:03]Oh, I did in the uh I did this commercial for Moto Casino.

[00:02:07]>> Moto >> Moto Casino. It's like one of them online gaming.

[00:02:11]>> Okay.

[00:02:11]>> And I had a top hat on cuz I was Abraham Lincoln.

[00:02:15]>> I could see it.

[00:02:16]>> Hell yeah. [laughter] Top hats are cool.

[00:02:19]>> That's hilarious. Did you just speak how you speak or did you do a voice for a Lincoln?

[00:02:23]>> Oh, no. I was me and then I was uh yeah I was just me on it.

[00:02:27]>> You know what's interesting? I was also a blink in that top hat.

[00:02:32]>> I went for uh that show uh Let's Make a Deal.

[00:02:38]>> You got on it. You was on it.

[00:02:39]>> Well, I went on as an audience member.

[00:02:41]>> Oh, okay.

[00:02:41]>> But you have to dress up.

[00:02:43]>> Like you dress up to try to get chosen.

[00:02:46]And my friend went I I just moved out here and she went as like a penny.

[00:02:51]>> Dang. How long you been living here?

[00:02:52]eight or nine years now.

[00:02:54]>> Hell yeah. I like I like LA. It's pretty cool. I wouldn't want to live here, though. It's too fast.

[00:02:59]>> What do you mean? It took you an hour to get here. [laughter] >> Well, I mean, that's what I'm saying.

[00:03:02]It's too It's like >> slow.

[00:03:06]>> Well, I mean, fast pace like everything Well, I mean, it ain't enough stage time for me for one.

[00:03:13]>> Yeah. I want occasionally after 9 years of living here, I'll get three or four spots a night, but it's all night. It's from 6 to 2 am and I'm driving the whole time with 10 minutes to 15 minutes in between where I'm staying.

[00:03:27]>> Doesn't shoot too well. Yeah.

[00:03:28]>> Yeah.

[00:03:29]>> That's what I But you know in Austin you can go from like Black Rabbit to Sunset to Mothership to Creek in the Cave. So that's what I like. It's so close right there.

[00:03:39]>> I just am afraid of walking around there.

[00:03:42]>> I feel you. It is the homeless people having you know it ain't as bad as it was. It's more the drunk guys than the homeless people. Homeless people have a system, you know. They have like a >> stay out of their way, you know.

[00:03:57]>> They got their own thing going. It do be a lot of drunk people out there, but I don't know if you know, we be on the road on the weekend. So, >> and als it's it's drunk people like whenever I would go and they'd be like, "Wait, are you leaving?" Like any establishment, I'd be like, "Yeah." They go, "Somebody has to walk you home." And I'll be like, "What?" And then they'd go, "You." and you walk her home and it's some guy I don't know at all and now I'm just alone with this guy who's been drinking all night and he's supposed to be responsible for me.

[00:04:25]>> No, I feel you. I think I think I think it's just a southern thing like Texas to walk a lady to a car.

[00:04:30]>> Make me feel like a dog though.

[00:04:32]>> What you mean?

[00:04:33]>> Like you got to walk her. I'm like I don't need to go on a walk.

[00:04:36]>> Well, no. I mean just for like safety or whatever.

[00:04:39]>> You know what I'm saying? I get what you're saying, but it's just like a southern thing to be a gentleman.

[00:04:43]>> I know. I'm old Arizona feminist. Yeah.

[00:04:46]So, you're like, "Fuck you, dude. I don't need a goddamn walk."

[00:04:49]>> I don't know why I'm like that. I don't I am though. I remember you teaching me about not standing on the side of the street.

[00:04:57]>> Well, yeah. Like, you know, I mean, it's just like a like a manners thing. Like, if the woman the the lady, >> she'll walk on the inside.

[00:05:04]>> So, you know, just in case a car jump out, you know, then it hit the man. And it makes you feel like embarrassed if I'm walking on the street side because other people will see you not being a gentleman.

[00:05:17]>> Well, I mean, I think I'm just old school about being a gentleman. And that's just the things that I just do.

[00:05:23]Like, if you don't want to do it, and that that's cool. I don't have a problem with it, but it's just manners I try to just practice myself.

[00:05:29]>> Yeah. You and Cam were like, "You got to let us walk on this side." [laughter] >> Yeah. Like, my bad. No one taught me that.

[00:05:36]>> Yeah, I know. I feel you. It's It's crazy like the more and more I travel how different parts of the country are like completely different than each other.

[00:05:44]>> Have you noticed something that really stands out like that?

[00:05:46]>> What uh >> like something like that is really different than how you grew up?

[00:05:52]>> I think LA the whole the whole the whole uh West Coast is more like equality. And I'm not saying it's not equalitywise in the south, but it's like how you were just saying like you don't have to walk me home. I'm not a dog. Like what are you doing? Yeah. Like a lady in the south would be like, "Well, thank you." And you know, like on the West Coast, y'all are think like, "You trying to demoralize me or you trying to break me down?" And it's like, "Nah, man. Just want to make sure you get on."

[00:06:20]>> I don't like being like that. But I have I read this thread today about um micro feminism and uh things people do and I never heard of it or thought of it, but it was like when you see a a a married couple, chances are like do you know anybody married?

[00:06:38]>> Yeah. Yeah.

[00:06:39]>> Okay. Who are they? What are their names?

[00:06:41]>> Uh my homeboy Willie and Carol. Okay, that was great because they say nine times out of ten people will say the men's name first and so then a micro feminist like thing to do would be like oh my friends Carol and Willie.

[00:06:55]>> Oh I feel it's just some some some things that I have bestowed in me. I just pract [laughter] cuz then like I say I say like yes ma'am no ma'am to like anybody. What if we freaky Friday one day where you become a feminist and I become a lady? [laughter] >> That'll be great. [laughter] >> It never It's never going to happen.

[00:07:22]>> What? You become a lady or me becoming a feminist? [laughter] >> I mean, I'm not a feminist is like a person who like when it rights like >> a feminist from my understanding is that men and women should be treated equal. I think men and women should be treated ically, you know, but >> it means you have to get rid of your manners.

[00:07:42]>> Well, no, I can't do that. Well, I say I do the same with like Yes, sir. You know what I mean? Like, if it's an older man, when I see Ron White, every time I see him, I say yes, sir.

[00:07:50]>> I'm going to start saying that.

[00:07:51]>> I mean I mean it just depend on the way you were raised. Like I wouldn't see how manners would bother a woman.

[00:07:57]>> I know. I I I think I was raised pretty feral.

[00:08:00]>> Well, I mean that's a West Coast thing though, you know?

[00:08:03]>> Yeah. Well, it's like everybody just even playing field.

[00:08:06]>> My mom would give her her debit card, my sister and I, and we'd walk to Burger King and then we'd eat Burger King while jumping on the couch watching TV.

[00:08:13]>> Yeah. Good times. [laughter] >> Yeah, really.

[00:08:15]>> Good times. It's just simple things like that that had make you have a good time, you know?

[00:08:19]>> Yeah. B Crasher, this is going to sound like a big brag, but it's just a thing that happened to me.

[00:08:25]>> Yeah. He took me on his private jet and he was like, we were eating breakfast with cutlery. Real silverware.

[00:08:33]>> Yeah. [laughter] Yeah. Silver stuff. I feel you.

[00:08:35]>> And I'm I'm cutting my steak and eggs and he's like looking at how I'm cutting the steak and he's like, "Uh, did you not see your dad much growing up?"

[00:08:45]>> Oh. What are you talking about?

[00:08:47]>> You cutting it like this, >> I guess. [laughter] >> Or like you don't you don't know how >> I was cutting it weird. I don't know.

[00:08:53]He's like, "Yeah, women who cut their steaks weird didn't have their dad around as much." And I'm like, I I was like arguing that I had a close relationship with my dad, but then it was true. I did see him every other weekend custody battles, but >> but I didn't know that he's so observant about that stuff, you know?

[00:09:12]>> The older you get, you observe more things than just like like me personally, like I don't have to be right or wrong about anything. Yeah.

[00:09:19]>> Like if you feel like you need to win, then you win. But I'm more peeping what's going on to see like who I want to be around.

[00:09:26]>> That's awesome. I like that about you. I I'm like that most of the time. Most people I feel like would agree and call me pretty chill. Yeah.

[00:09:34]>> But occasionally I get something where it's like bothers justice. Like I have to be like I have to >> stand up for something. I I went through like a swing because when I drink, when I used to drink, I didn't have to be right or wrong. Like, ah, whatever. He got it. Then when I stopped drinking, it was like every little thing bothered me.

[00:09:56]>> Yeah.

[00:09:57]>> Like anything. I'm just like, why you why you doing that? And then now I got back to the point where I'm like, I don't care.

[00:10:03]>> Yeah. I don't think I've ever We've gone on the road together and I don't think I've ever seen you get >> like upset, you know?

[00:10:10]>> You can't, man. You only get one life and it's like what weighs in more to me >> being right or whatever >> or just being chill.

[00:10:21]>> Well, I disagree.

[00:10:23]>> Cool with you. That's all right.

[00:10:25][laughter] You can't get me. I'm on my pivot. You know what I mean?

[00:10:28]>> I'm going to make you a feminist before this pod's over.

[00:10:31]>> So, [laughter] what like if I become a feminist, do I have to like not shave my armpits? What else? What else you got to do to be a feminist?

[00:10:38]>> Are you shaving them now? Nah, they just don't grow. Like I don't have leg hair on my legs. I never shave.

[00:10:44]>> Dang.

[00:10:45]>> I just don't grow hair.

[00:10:46]>> You really aren't a feminist. [laughter] >> Yeah, I might I might be. Well, no. I can't be a feminist cuz I can't grow hair on my legs.

[00:10:52]>> I think I think you might be more of a feminist than you think.

[00:10:55]>> For real?

[00:10:56]>> Yeah, cuz you've always treated me like an equal.

[00:10:59]>> Well, yeah. I mean, I treat all women like equal. [laughter] When you be when you have manners, it don't mean like I'm putting that person down.

[00:11:06]>> Can you say just womanous? Womenist.

[00:11:09]>> Womaners.

[00:11:10]>> Women.

[00:11:11]>> I don't like manners.

[00:11:12]>> Why?

[00:11:13]>> It's a maledominated word.

[00:11:15]>> Wow. That is [laughter] crazy. Are you a feminist? You a feminist?

[00:11:18]>> I'm playing. Okay.

[00:11:20]>> I know. I have to tell my Sometimes if this was clipped online, it's going to go to a really dark algorithm of the internet of men who hate women and then they're going to think I'm serious about all this stuff.

[00:11:30]>> Yeah. Yeah. No, I I love women.

[00:11:32][laughter] Y'all definitely equals.

[00:11:35]>> We're going to clip that part.

[00:11:37]>> Whatever. Whatever you need to hear.

[00:11:39]Y'all equals or whatever. Like, cool.

[00:11:42]>> I go back and forth, but I I would never be like, "Please don't say manners."

[00:11:46][laughter] >> Do you ever wake up?

[00:11:47]>> I'm joking. I'm joking.

[00:11:49]>> Do you Do you ever wake up and you want to yell out, "Woman, go in there and make me a sandwich."

[00:11:54]>> Oh, man. In regards to Squink, my dog, if I if she could go in the kitchen and make me breakfast, >> would you still You wouldn't be a feminist then.

[00:12:03]>> It depends how she makes it though.

[00:12:04]>> What? What she got on? [laughter] What do you mean? What?

[00:12:10]>> What is she wearing? [laughter] >> Yeah, I don't know what you mean.

[00:12:13]>> Yeah, like if she looks all haggarded and stuff, I'm not eating it.

[00:12:17]>> What if she got on like a tea bag with like a apron that say, "Suck me. I'm beautiful."

[00:12:22]>> So, [laughter] >> she she be >> I'm like, "That dog can get it.

[00:12:26]>> That dog can get it." You better believe she can.

[00:12:29]>> No, I meant like how she makes it. Like if there's going to be hair in it, >> like how is she cooking it?

[00:12:35]>> Yeah. like go wash your paws, you know, have a little decency about yourself.

[00:12:38]>> A little decency is I was thinking the quality of the food. You're thinking the quality of the dog. [laughter] >> Well, no. I mean, cuz if she hairy, that's going to make the food disgusting. I probably want to eat hairy hairy eggs.

[00:12:50]>> No. Yeah.

[00:12:52]>> Or like casserole, green bean loafs, or whatever, you know, whatever you into. I know we in California.

[00:12:57]>> That's a staple for u white food is like >> casserole beans, >> green bean casserole. Do you have you ever had it?

[00:13:05]>> Yeah, every year for Thanksgiving.

[00:13:07][laughter] >> All right. Okay. It's not a myth.

[00:13:10]>> We love that stuff.

[00:13:11]>> Green bean casserole >> with the fried onions on top.

[00:13:14]>> We we were in uh Cleveland and um this dude we we did a show where it was like a like a like a YouTube show and the guy brought like a ca casserole that his mom made.

[00:13:26]>> Okay.

[00:13:26]>> And it was disgusting.

[00:13:29]>> Yeah. Yeah. Casserole and Why did He must have brought it for your reaction.

[00:13:33]>> Well, it was Yeah. Yeah, it was a show called What was the name of the show? I can't think of their names. They real big.

[00:13:38]>> Fear Factor. [laughter] It's like a bug casserole.

[00:13:41]>> Ha. Have you Have you It might have been Bugs. It was a lot of mayonnaise cuz you know you know they they were whitey.

[00:13:48]>> Yeah.

[00:13:49]>> Yeah. So, but it was called like a taking my black friend to do white things and then taking my white friend to do black things. You might have seen the clips. I'm not sure. But >> that sounds good.

[00:13:58]>> Yeah. They got like millions of followers.

[00:14:00]>> Yeah. It's bringing the bringing the world together. Bringing the world together.

[00:14:04]>> One casserole at a time.

[00:14:06]>> One casserole. In a couple years, everybody gonna be orange, so it don't matter, you know? Like we all going to be one. Yeah. I'm gonna have me an orange baby. But like >> what do you mean by that?

[00:14:16]>> Like I mean because like you say bringing the world together like black people and white people. It's so much like interracial dating that just everybody going to be orange.

[00:14:25]>> Yeah. Are you dating interraially?

[00:14:28]>> I got a black girl.

[00:14:30]She got a big old dump truck on her too with a [laughter] big old >> big old rack.

[00:14:38]>> Oh, [laughter] when you say wreck, I get like a trombone. You say objectifying her. I wanted to help.

[00:14:44]>> I'm not objectifying. I'm telling you [laughter] what she got. She got a fat ass. That's objectification.

[00:14:50]>> Well, I don't know. I can tell the way you're saying it. You're saying it with a good heart.

[00:14:55]>> Yeah, I mean it. And I you like Yeah.

[00:14:57]You're When you say she got a fat ass, it's not just about her butt.

[00:15:02]>> Yeah. It's about >> the whole thing is >> aura. Yeah. Her whole aura is just glowing.

[00:15:07]>> I know what you mean.

[00:15:08]>> I'd probably get cancelled if I lived in California or New York. I'm pretty sure I would.

[00:15:12]>> There's no more borders. It's just the internet.

[00:15:15]>> Okay.

[00:15:16]>> You could get cancelled in Wyoming.

[00:15:18]>> Yeah. [laughter] But I mean, it's hard to get cancelled when you just come from a funny place. A lot of people get cancelceled when they come from like a evil place, you know.

[00:15:26]>> Well, you know, Yeah. And you know what it is, too? It's it's some people they're coming from a good place, but the audience doesn't know they are.

[00:15:33]>> Yeah. The audience >> you got a liability that people know you're joking.

[00:15:37]>> Yeah. I mean, it's just I'm just being a silly goof. We just being goobers. You know what I mean?

[00:15:41]>> And you could tell by your your uh by the people who like vouch for you. Like I was I was telling Pippa earlier, you got a guy for everything.

[00:15:50]>> Yeah.

[00:15:50]>> Like everything. You got a Marriott guy.

[00:15:52]You got a southwest guy.

[00:15:53]>> I hooked you up, didn't I? I hook you up. Yeah. You feel me?

[00:15:56]>> But it's like a testament to like it's so anybody could have like know a bunch of people, but all these people want to help you.

[00:16:02]>> Yeah, that's a blessing.

[00:16:03]>> That's a blessing, but also a testament to your character and I think that helps you get away with, you know, saying whatever you want to say.

[00:16:12]>> I got some wild jokes now, man. They be crazy.

[00:16:16]>> I haven't seen you grow up in a long time. But I mean, but they're not wild.

[00:16:19]Like, nobody ever get offended by nothing I say. Nobody has ever came up to me and said, "Hey, man, that joke about this was messed up because it's all just you're just being goobers, you know?

[00:16:30]>> They know you're joking."

[00:16:31]>> Yeah.

[00:16:32]>> If you were up there just saying hate speech and people were like, "I think he believes that."

[00:16:37]>> Yeah. Nah. Everybody know it's stupid.

[00:16:39]Austin is kind of weird cuz like you got a lot of comics who come there who don't come from a background of comedy.

[00:16:45]they'll just wake up and say, "Man, I'm moving to Austin and starting comedy."

[00:16:49]So, they don't know no rules or just like respect factor. But, you do have a lot of seasoned comics that's moving there now that are like kind of helping these guys out like, "Hey, man. Just like just be funny, bro. Like, you ain't got to get the shock value."

[00:17:04]>> Yeah. They It's It's hard. We take it for granted. I think people who have done it as long as we have, you take for granted how easy it is to command a room.

[00:17:13]>> Yeah. Yeah, >> like when I started it was hard to get everyone's attention >> and keep it. And now I I kind of forget >> it just is like second nature now.

[00:17:22]>> Second nature.

[00:17:23]>> But these guys, they go up and and the only way I remember as a young comic I could get everyone's attention is if I said something crazy and [laughter] everybody's looking at you and they're like, whoa. But that's not always like >> just because you got their attention doesn't mean you did it the right way.

[00:17:37]Like you got but you got to learn how to do it first.

[00:17:40]>> They might be hating you. They might be getting a picture of your face cuz they going to catch you outside. You know what I mean?

[00:17:46]>> Yeah. You got to So, I think they're learning that lesson out there. So, I have a lot of fairies in here today.

[00:17:51]>> Oh, it's all good.

[00:17:52]>> That's what I call them. Bugs.

[00:17:53]>> A man. [laughter] Things happen, man.

[00:17:54]You know, we in California. Y'all love bugs.

[00:17:57]>> We got fruit flies here. So, my grandma said California is the land of fruit and fruits and nuts.

[00:18:02]>> Fruits and and nuts.

[00:18:04]>> Yeah.

[00:18:05]>> I think she meant um agriculturally, but [laughter] >> also the people. Oh, okay.

[00:18:12]I wasn't going to say that, man. I might get cancelled for that one. Do uh downtown.

[00:18:17]>> Downtown can be really fun, but it's scary out there.

[00:18:20]>> Yeah, I heard it was like ain't that where uh >> I'm not going to try to be brave or nothing. It's pretty It could be pretty scary there at night. But >> is that where the store is? That's not downtown, right?

[00:18:29]>> No, the comedy store is in West Hollywood.

[00:18:31]>> West Hollywood. That's the name of that.

[00:18:32]>> That's the notoriously gay area.

[00:18:34]>> Yeah.

[00:18:35]>> That's crazy. would put the comedy store there because they got a bunch of crazy acts >> that you know you thought I would think that some of the stuff some people might say >> the safest >> defend them [laughter] >> the all they're trying to do is have sex with other men.

[00:18:50]>> Hey man, do your thing man.

[00:18:51]>> Who are the most vi violent people if you were to guess like out of men and women?

[00:18:57]>> Oh uh definitely women.

[00:18:59]>> What? No >> women are crazy. [laughter] It's just not effective. When a woman get mad, she will beat the snot out of you.

[00:19:05]>> Statistically though, men are are do more violent crimes.

[00:19:09]>> Yeah. And plus, a lot of men have egos and that's most of the time why you get in a fight with somebody. It could be something small like you stepped on somebody's shoe or something. Then instead of saying, "Hey, excuse me." Or me saying, "Excuse me," then you want to say, "That's right. You better like come on, man." Like what if I just beat you up right now? You know, >> I wish I could do that. Have you ever beat someone up?

[00:19:31]>> Yeah.

[00:19:31]>> Yeah. Okay. I've never done it.

[00:19:33]>> Never. You never got in a fight. Never.

[00:19:34]>> No. Will you? Let's do it.

[00:19:36]>> Get in [laughter] a fight. No. I don't want to go to jail.

[00:19:39]>> Let's beat up Let's beat up Pippa.

[00:19:41]>> Let's just go Let's just go downtown and beat up homeless people.

[00:19:45]>> Oh, okay. That would be my first fight.

[00:19:47]>> Well, or we can kind of talk to the homeless people about who maybe is a bother to them and help them out.

[00:19:52]>> A >> cuz you know, we want to stay woke.

[00:19:55]>> Yeah, I [laughter] feel you. Or I mean like if you pay them if you say like, "Hey man, I give you 20 bucks and we just going to get into like a fight."

[00:20:02]She's never fought before, but you can't hit her. And maybe you can just get a couple good ones in. And you're doing a good job because you're giving them $20.

[00:20:10]>> Yeah, but um I'll do it. But you have to call them unhoused people.

[00:20:16]>> Oh, you can't say homeless.

[00:20:17]>> No, I'm just kidding.

[00:20:18]>> I'm about to say I'm saying homeless.

[00:20:20][ __ ] [laughter] that [ __ ] Y'all not going to reprogram my whole my whole life.

[00:20:25]>> So funny. Yeah, I once read a joke. I was like, "Oh, it's it's you're supposed to apparently you call them unhoused, not homeless." But there's like some people look >> like I was like anybody who's outside is technically unhoused, but some people just look homeless. [laughter] >> There's a difference.

[00:20:42]>> I feel you. Like comedians who move to like LA with like $1,000 and no apartment, those people are unhoused.

[00:20:50]>> Yes. But homeless people are the ones who like have had the same underwear on for nine days.

[00:20:55]>> Yeah. [laughter] That's how you tell.

[00:20:57]Yeah. You check dirt.

[00:20:59]>> You got to take the streak in the back.

[00:21:01]Huh?

[00:21:01]>> Yeah. [laughter] >> Is this a fresh streak or is this a nine day old streak >> and then you decide what pronouns he use for them?

[00:21:10]>> Oh, see that'll bother me, man. Like some words are just like like calling somebody homeless. How is that offensive?

[00:21:17]>> I don't know how it all works.

[00:21:19]>> Yeah, man. And I just I'd be afraid to talk to people now.

[00:21:22]>> Well, I know some people who use those words and they're the most open-minded, big-hearted people I've ever met. And they're like they're just trying to do good by people where it's like if you lost everything you own and you end up on the streets and then someone's like, "Look at that homeless person." I could see how that would hurt them. But there are some people who it's like they aren't even registering the word homeless talking to [laughter] them.

[00:21:46]Like if you say like I'd be kind of offended if you call me unhoused.

[00:21:51]>> Yeah. Look at that unhoused guy.

[00:21:53]>> Yeah. You know [laughter] that's kind of offensive. That's like uh that's like how America used to be like the R word.

[00:22:00]The R word wasn't offensive. And most of the time you're not you when you saying it, you putting the ed on the end. So you telling the person the medical term for it. But then the other word is special needs. I would be offended if you called me special needs. You know, >> I I would feel um seen >> seen. [laughter] >> If you called me special needs, >> you wouldn't want to be called the R word.

[00:22:25]>> No, I wouldn't want to be called >> What about ED with the ED on the end?

[00:22:29]That's the medical term for it.

[00:22:32]>> Um I would I'd prefer a mentally [laughter] challenged.

[00:22:36]>> Oh, no, no, no, no. You can't pick what you want. It's either the R word or is special needs.

[00:22:42]>> Special needs. You rather be called special needs.

[00:22:44]>> Yeah.

[00:22:46]>> Because today that word it's it's either going to it just causes so much pain to people.

[00:22:52]>> Back in the days >> they want to say it and then I like you can't say it. I'm like just call me special needs.

[00:22:57]>> But they had so back in the days that word meant like so much. Most of it when you use that word it was something like you saying something cool you know like a man you so funny that person was >> you know what I'm saying? Like, oh, she >> I never used it that way.

[00:23:14]>> You weren't born then. You weren't black.

[00:23:17]>> No, I'm just saying [laughter] it was white people using it, too. Really?

[00:23:20]>> Yeah. You in your 30s. I'm 45. You know what I mean? Like, >> yeah. Sorry, sir.

[00:23:24]>> Oh, it's all good.

[00:23:24]>> See, I'm becoming a lady.

[00:23:26]>> No, don't call me sir. I ain't that [laughter] old.

[00:23:28]>> You said you have to respect your elders.

[00:23:30]>> Not all elders. I mean like if you're like 80 years old, you know.

[00:23:33]>> You said Ron White's 80.

[00:23:35]>> Yeah, he about 80. Really?

[00:23:37]>> He at least 70. I want to say he just hit 70.

[00:23:40]>> He listens to this.

[00:23:41]>> Ron White the man. I love Ron White.

[00:23:43]>> He's cool.

[00:23:44]>> Hell yeah.

[00:23:44]>> I never know if he remembers me, but >> Ron know what's going on. He always just chilling.

[00:23:50]>> The first time I went to the mothership, I went in the green Tony was like, "Come in the green room." He invited me in and they they were all It was Rogan and Ron White and Tony and they all had IV drips in for vitamins, but it looked like a hospital. [laughter] >> You talking about that uh >> that IV drip? Yeah, >> they had a old doctor there. She's so nice. And >> he was like, "Do you want one?" Rogan offered me one.

[00:24:13]>> And I normally would have taken one, but it was one of those.

[00:24:15]>> I never did one. I'm afraid.

[00:24:16]>> It felt like a trick, you know? I'm like, "Is it rude to say yes?

[00:24:20]>> Is it rude to say no?" Like, [laughter] I don't know.

[00:24:22]>> You were doing too much thinking.

[00:24:24]>> I was thinking way too much.

[00:24:25]>> When I first got to Austin, I used to be like, "Oh man, that's, you know, like I don't want to mess this up." And then one show I was on with Tony, like I was just sitting in like in between the little boy and the green room and Tony was like, "Man, what you doing?" And I was like, "Hey, I'm just chilling." You know, Joe in there. I don't want >> I got to say for the listeners, the little boy is the name of the room.

[00:24:45]>> Yeah.

[00:24:45]>> You just said you [laughter] were in the green room. The little boy >> like this is a bomb. Oh [laughter] yeah.

[00:24:51]They might think a little a little fella.

[00:24:54]>> Yeah. I don't know. I should clarify.

[00:24:56]It's a name.

[00:24:57]>> It's a name of a of of a comedy room.

[00:25:00]But you know, Tony cool, man. Tony be wanting everybody to feel fit in, you know, like just feel like you're at home. And then after that and I'm sitting there chilling with Joe and like now when I see Joe, I'm like, "What up, boy?" You know what I mean? Like that's my homeboy now. That's my partner, man.

[00:25:14]>> I'm glad that you're still liking it out there and everything.

[00:25:17]>> Yeah. Cuz I don't I don't like uh I love it because I do what I need to do and then I go back home. Like I live in I live in Mayor, Texas. That's like it take me 25 minutes to get to the mothership.

[00:25:30]>> Oh yeah.

[00:25:31]>> But but that's just because I like I like the country living.

[00:25:36]>> Weed's not legal there yet >> in Texas.

[00:25:38]>> Yeah.

[00:25:38]>> Nah, not yet.

[00:25:39]>> I mean, but in also this is decriminalized.

[00:25:42]>> How much time are we at? Can we talk about it?

[00:25:44]>> 25.

[00:25:45]>> Oh yeah. Okay. And then you Yeah. You I had a a J for you in my my apocalypse jar. That apocalypse jar got some fire in it.

[00:25:53]>> I want write a comment if anybody else is like this. I I have a case full of um dandelions.

[00:26:00]>> But tell them what kind of case it was.

[00:26:01]It's like one of them cases that Marilyn Monroe had.

[00:26:04]>> It lift up and it's got the rose on it like the >> kaboodleoodle.

[00:26:07]>> A kaboodleoodle.

[00:26:08]>> Yeah. Those like old school, right?

[00:26:10]Those ain't those new. People still had those.

[00:26:13]>> I don't know. I don't even remember where I got that thing. It's old.

[00:26:16][laughter] >> Yeah. That's when you first got >> my great great grandmother's dandelions passed down from >> great great grandmother's kuto [laughter] >> would you uh uh what I was going to say how many years do you think that joint was in there?

[00:26:36]>> Probably less than eight >> years.

[00:26:39]>> Yeah.

[00:26:40]>> Wow. Oh, I got to keep I got to get me some grass and put it somewhere. And I'm letting it sit for 10 years. It'll probably kill you.

[00:26:48]>> That's the way you're I I was told like you're supposed to dandelion. I never had the dandelion enough to do it until I started cleaning up my system. But people I knew would they'd buy dandelions keep them >> for eight years.

[00:27:00]>> I don't know that long. But they would like keep them in their drawer or but when we whenever me and my friends wanted to do dandelions the guy that night and dandelions >> I got a buddy of mine he don't he don't he just drinks he don't smoke he don't do drugs but if you go to his house he got like a bag of >> dandelion >> yeah he got like a little >> Can we say all this stuff?

[00:27:21]>> Yeah.

[00:27:21]>> Is YouTube pull it down?

[00:27:23]>> We can put stuff over it.

[00:27:24]>> Okay. Give me another word. Dandelion I can dub over >> sea money. Or how about some uh some white girl? That's what they call it.

[00:27:33]>> No, call something like dandelions or something. [laughter] >> Okay. All right. Well, yeah. He'll have a little a little bag of dandelions over here. [laughter] He'll have some uh sunflower seeds, you know, for a real good time.

[00:27:44]>> Yeah. Sunshine.

[00:27:45]>> Yeah.

[00:27:46]>> I'm going to use these words and dub over what we were talking about earlier.

[00:27:49]>> Nice.

[00:27:50]>> In editing.

[00:27:50]>> Oh, yeah. You got to make sure that you you uh you got to keep it monetized.

[00:27:55]>> Yeah. We got to stay monetized, right?

[00:27:58]Why else are we doing this? [laughter] >> Do you have Do you have You say you had a monle, didn't it? The eye.

[00:28:03]>> Look right in that camera. You got a monle on right now.

[00:28:06]>> Oh, Kley, [laughter] you keep this the whole time. I love monles, man.

[00:28:10]>> Nope. Not the whole time. [laughter] >> Monopoly was such a fun game, man. I think >> I disagree.

[00:28:17]>> You don't like Monopoly?

[00:28:18]>> It's too long.

[00:28:19]>> A It's fun though.

[00:28:20]>> Takes forever.

[00:28:22]If you just looking for a quick win, I like the whole thing and the breakdown of like I buy a railroad and I'm doing this. I just like to play the game. When I was a kid, I couldn't play it either cuz I didn't have uh patience for anything.

[00:28:36]>> Yeah, it would take forever.

[00:28:37]>> I'm I like to be the banker >> cuz you like to like rip everybody off.

[00:28:42]>> I like to hold the money.

[00:28:43]>> Okay. Do you ever like slip yourself a couple extra dollars?

[00:28:46]>> I never I never did. I think my conscience would weigh too heavy on me, but uh I wish I could live like that.

[00:28:52]>> You're better than me. I I'm in it to win. Don't leave me with all that money.

[00:28:56]It's going to be like $10,000 missing.

[00:28:58]>> It go Monopoly is way too long. I liked Hungry Hungry Hippos.

[00:29:03]>> Yeah, that game is like 19 minutes at tops. If it's four players, >> straight to the point, there's no reading the rules. You're a hippo.

[00:29:10]You're hungry. Eat.

[00:29:10]>> You know how to do it. Let's get it.

[00:29:12]Let's do it.

[00:29:13]>> I like checkers. I like solitire like card games. Checkers is fun. Chess is fun.

[00:29:18]>> I ain't played chess in a while.

[00:29:20]>> A little too hard for me. [laughter] >> It's it's it's it's thinking three moves ahead is a problem with chess. With a lot of people that come down to patience.

[00:29:28]>> Yeah.

[00:29:29]>> You don't have a lot of patience, do you?

[00:29:30]>> Anyway, [laughter] no, I do. But with certain things, like I trained Squink how to do a bunch of tricks.

[00:29:39]>> That takes patience.

[00:29:41]>> Nice.

[00:29:41]>> I'm patience with people. Like I I'm Oh, the weed's kicking in. Yeah, [laughter] you you good and high.

[00:29:47]>> I know. I'm patient with people like I give people a lot of uh chances, you know, like you know, and then to figure stuff out and I'm patient with that, but >> I'm trying to think when a time when I've been impatient and definitely when I was younger, but now now it's like I' I've understand I don't have control over anything, so I just like it is what it is kind of mentality.

[00:30:11]>> For sure.

[00:30:12]>> Yeah, >> for sure. Have you lost patience recently? Do you remember any time where maybe you were like, "Hurry up, hurry up."

[00:30:20]>> Well, my son did something crazy the other day, >> but it's just like if I ask him to do something cuz he go to school in Florida, but he's >> How old is your son?

[00:30:28]>> 21.

[00:30:29]>> That's crazy.

[00:30:31]I'm elder. You're old. You got a 21y old.

[00:30:34]>> Yeah, but I mean that you can start young and have a >> You have an adult, man. [laughter] >> He just turned 21.

[00:30:40]>> That's crazy.

[00:30:41]>> And we we were coming. I had went to get him from work and we were going back to the house and we stopped by a store and he bought a buzz ball >> and I was like, [laughter] "Wow, you can buy alcohol, man. This is nuts."

[00:30:53]>> He would get buzz. 21-year-old. They're kids.

[00:30:56]>> Yeah, man. They just want to get [laughter] smacked. They don't care like the quality of it. I just want to get smacked and I want a hangover tomorrow.

[00:31:03]>> They look like Pokemon balls. Like they're they're they have to be uh marketed towards kids.

[00:31:09]>> Oh, yeah. And they look fun. Yeah. And they do the trick. One buzz ball can take you to the moon.

[00:31:15]>> So funny.

[00:31:16]>> It say like 20% alcohol, but I guarantee it's more alcohol in there than like a bottle of whiskey.

[00:31:22]>> So you went with him when he turned 21 to drink. No.

[00:31:26]>> No, he just I was going to get him from work. He just grabbed one to go back to the house with. So funny.

[00:31:32]>> And I [clears throat] never seen him buy alcohol. So I was like, "Wow."

[00:31:35]>> Yeah. That's got to be eye opening.

[00:31:37]>> That's got to be weird.

[00:31:38]>> He a good kid though. Like he go to college. He just he's with me for the summer.

[00:31:42]>> Oh >> yeah. So he a good kid.

[00:31:44]>> He's in Austin.

[00:31:45]>> He's in Austin right now.

[00:31:47]>> Wow.

[00:31:48]>> Yeah. But no, he don't really he like me, man. I'm like a a loner. Like I'll just Well, I'm not against hanging with people, but my first option is going to be, hey man, I'm about to do something by myself.

[00:32:01]>> Yeah.

[00:32:01]>> You know, and then he just like me, he'll stay in the room. He'll go to work. He works at uh at the mall. So other than that, he's completely okay being by himself.

[00:32:13]>> Yeah.

[00:32:13]>> Like >> I've always been like that, too.

[00:32:15]>> Yeah.

[00:32:16]>> Yeah.

[00:32:16]>> Like I got two brothers and a sister on my dad's side, but I'm I'm a mom only child, so I grew up as an only child.

[00:32:22]>> Dang.

[00:32:23]>> Yeah. I can sit in a room by myself with no phone or nothing.

[00:32:27]>> I love my sister and we're close, but she's six years older than me. So when I was in >> by the time I was in like junior high, she was out of the house.

[00:32:36]>> Yeah. So those those six years, yeah, I spent a lot of time alone.

[00:32:41]>> Most of it was like, "Hey, you little you little twerp." Did she ever call you a twerp? [laughter] >> No.

[00:32:45]>> No.

[00:32:46]>> No. That's so funny. She listens to every episode. I can't wait for her to call me. She's going to call me a twerp now.

[00:32:52]>> Nice. [laughter] Twerp is a twerp was like one of them old words.

[00:32:56]>> We never picked on each other.

[00:32:58]>> No.

[00:32:58]>> No. We were We've always been friendly.

[00:33:01]Yeah.

[00:33:01]>> Nice.

[00:33:02]>> Yeah. We've had each other's backs, you know, >> cuz all of my friends that I know got brothers and sisters, they don't hate each other, but when they were younger, they would really like push each other buttons. I just thought it came with the territory.

[00:33:16]>> Yeah. I think I annoyed her more than she annoyed me.

[00:33:19]>> Oh, yeah. Yeah. Cuz you're the younger sister.

[00:33:20]>> Yeah.

[00:33:21]>> And she probably was like, "Man, I don't really want to like beat you up or nothing." It's usually older brothers that do that. But my cousins are two years apart and I I would go over to their house all the time and they fought a lot.

[00:33:34]>> Yeah.

[00:33:34]>> They I hate you and slam doors and we'd just be like whoa.

[00:33:38]>> My my cousin he uh him and his brothers are all one. No, they all two years apart and they used to tear the house up >> like go at it like fighting.

[00:33:51]>> Yeah. Oh yeah.

[00:33:52]>> You got to teach me how to fight. Hey uh excuse me. Uh, what's that under there?

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[00:35:06]>> I'mma show you.

[00:35:06]>> How long are you in town for?

[00:35:08]>> Till Friday morning.

[00:35:10]>> Okay. We go to the comedy store. We We pick the weakest comic we see.

[00:35:14]>> Yeah. Let's just beat up door guys.

[00:35:15]We'll note door guys cuz you know they're going to get past there someday.

[00:35:20]>> Oh yeah.

[00:35:20]>> We got to think ahead, you know. But but >> open micers.

[00:35:23]>> Pot luck. Yeah.

[00:35:24]>> Yes.

[00:35:24]>> Potluck. Open mic.

[00:35:26]>> They got a show tonight that's like something called a bucket pool show or something.

[00:35:30]>> Oh, set of the night. Saturday night.

[00:35:32]That's the one.

[00:35:33]>> So we going to just beat him up?

[00:35:34]>> We go to Saturday night. We got to we got to kind of look at lay of the land first. I have I have an advantage cuz I'm past I'm paid regular. So I can we can go in the sacred ground. We can we can pick them apart. I say, "Hey, hey, uh, it's going to be a girl, right?"

[00:35:49]>> No, >> no, >> I'm not hitting a woman. [laughter] >> No, I'm doing the fight.

[00:35:53]>> Oh, you fighting? Okay.

[00:35:54]>> You're right, though. But if we if I'm losing, you can step in. So, it's got to be a guy.

[00:35:58]>> If it's a dude, cuz he probably he'll be like, "Why is Jesse Johnson beating me up?" And then by the time he go to like grab you, then I'mma pick him up and get him out of there.

[00:36:07]>> And then he'll be like, "Well, I'm a big fan." [laughter] >> Yeah. I just got beat up by David Jolly and Jessica Johnson. What just happened?

[00:36:15]This is crazy.

[00:36:15]>> This is crazy. And then Yeah, we'll we'll get him we'll get him a spot on public.

[00:36:20]>> Yeah, that's nice of you. After a good butt whooping, you know what I mean?

[00:36:23]>> Yeah. So, we have to go in and find the smallest male comedian uh there at the store.

[00:36:30]>> Yeah.

[00:36:31]>> Weakest.

[00:36:32]>> Weakest link.

[00:36:33]>> Yeah.

[00:36:33]>> So, what is set of the night and what is potluck? Potluck is the like the crew show, right?

[00:36:39]>> Um yes and no. Like so potluck is uh from 6:00 to 7:00 is the open mic.

[00:36:45]Anybody can sign up.

[00:36:46]>> Okay.

[00:36:47]>> And then from 7 to 9:30 is the friends and family.

[00:36:51]>> Okay.

[00:36:51]>> So that's like you you would be there and >> that's on Monday.

[00:36:54]>> That's Monday and sometimes >> Oh, Sunday they just do the friends and family part of it.

[00:37:00]>> Okay.

[00:37:00]>> Till 8 and then it rolls into a a paid regular show. But then uh but then on potluck at around 9:30 it then there's a paid regular portion that's kind of like a mic as well like any paid regular can sign up. Oh >> okay. What about set of the night? What?

[00:37:15]>> So set of the night is like the open mic at the comedy store.

[00:37:18]>> Okay.

[00:37:19]>> Anybody can sign up. If you buy a drink you can put in like you can sign up on a paper but if you buy a drink you can put a receipt sign up put in the bucket. So you have like two buckets to get pulled from.

[00:37:30]>> Nice. Okay.

[00:37:30]>> And it it's fun. It's like there has to be ways like that into the comedy store or else there no one would ever get in.

[00:37:37]>> Yeah.

[00:37:37]>> That's how I got went there. I just went and put my name in a bucket.

[00:37:40]>> Oh. For set of the night >> for Kill Tony.

[00:37:43]>> Nice.

[00:37:43]>> In 2016.

[00:37:45]>> And then that's how you became a regular.

[00:37:47]>> Um long story short. Yeah. But then a lot of stuff happened in between.

[00:37:51]>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But that's how you got your foot on the radar of them watching you and doing the grinding. Were you ever a door guy?

[00:37:59]>> Yeah.

[00:37:59]>> Nice.

[00:38:00]>> Yeah. I'd actually became a door guy like almost a decade into my career. I thought it was like past that point of being able to and uh they asked me if I wanted to and I said yes and it changed my life.

[00:38:12]>> Like I didn't know like Adam when I when I went down there I went and I I got on the mic and then Adam invited me back.

[00:38:22]So I flew back the next week >> to the mother ship.

[00:38:25]>> To the mother ship. This when I was living in Florida. this one of the main reasons I moved was cuz I got passed before I went there, but I didn't know.

[00:38:32]So when I got there, >> he asked me if I wanted to be a door guide, and I was like, "Yeah, why not?"

[00:38:37]You know?

[00:38:37]>> Yeah.

[00:38:38]>> And but the thing is, I was definitely the worst door guy.

[00:38:42]>> Well, why? I'd actually see could see you doing well. Why were you bad at it?

[00:38:47]Because like my in my mind I needed to get up five to 10 nights, five to seven times, as many times as I could possibly get up. Like I wasn't saying no to nothing. But once I learned like, hey man, you don't have to do all of this. You burning yourself out. Like doing five, six shows in a night sometime it hurt. You know, you got to really run. But what I would do is I would seat everybody and then I would like tell tell Heather or something like, "Hey, Heather, I got a spot." So they not really gonna check, you know?

[00:39:20]So I would go to my spot, but then I would go to I would have a spot at Sunset. I would go do the Vulcan. I run over here to to Black Rabbit and then by the time I get back, the place is coming out. Like little boy will be letting out.

[00:39:35]>> Oh. And then you What do you have to do?

[00:39:37]Oh, then I just go and I I take the phones out of the bags and I do what need to be done like whatever or like we flip the room, you know.

[00:39:45]>> What would you guys What would you be doing differently if you didn't go to a spot?

[00:39:48]>> Sitting around.

[00:39:49]>> That's what I'm saying. At the comedy store, we have to be in the rooms the whole time. And some comics don't do it.

[00:39:56]I always think it's funny when I see a door guy like, "Yeah, I'm kind of overwork." I'm like, I want to like grab their shoulders and be like, "This is the best job you'll ever [laughter] >> The best job you'll ever have." If as far as a job, it's the best ever. And until you stop doing it, you realize like, man, they were paying me a lot of money for nothing >> just to hang out.

[00:40:14]>> To hang out.

[00:40:15]>> Yeah. The job's so easy. But for the store, I kind of stop myself short. But you have to be in the room because if somebody starts heckling or there's certain things you can see before they become a problem.

[00:40:24]>> But see, you all the great thing about the mothership, man, like we got >> Yeah. security.

[00:40:29]>> Yeah. Your security. We got like ninjas, you know what I mean?

[00:40:32]>> They're hanging from the ceiling.

[00:40:33]>> Yeah. [laughter] They're like MMA fighters. Literal MMA fighters.

[00:40:37]>> They're like blending into the wall.

[00:40:38][laughter] >> Yeah. Oh man. But they all the nicest guys. So they all just nice people, man.

[00:40:44]And it's like they never Nobody has ever had to get beat up.

[00:40:49]>> No. I mean, >> like never. You I've seen people having to be like asked to leave, but it ain't I never seen it get like physical or nothing.

[00:40:56]>> The security is great at the comedy store, but the place is so big. Yeah, >> they can't be. We don't have as many.

[00:41:02]So, >> how many y'all got?

[00:41:03]>> I don't know. Gosh, I don't know. Maybe six, >> man. Man, at night of the mother ship, you got three wanding. You got a one on the corner with the people who like who are checking people in.

[00:41:18]>> You got like two maybe three in each room in the in the in the fat man. You got two in the corner, two in the back.

[00:41:26]Like but I mean also you know you got Rogan and you know he got he got like he has to have that because of how where he at you know >> not only because of where he is at status wise but the street you're on is like way more high traffic >> sick street man >> there's a lot going on >> a lot going on >> sunset's pretty much dead now like as far as people walking by the the House of Blues used to be across the street from the comedy store. What?

[00:41:52]>> So it was like a concert, you know, like they would have concerts there. And >> where is it at now? Was it still around or was it in Universal City?

[00:41:59]>> They they tore it down and built the hotel.

[00:42:02]>> Dang.

[00:42:02]>> So it's all highrises around there.

[00:42:04]There's not a lot of foot traffic of people like what's going on here.

[00:42:07]>> Oh yeah. Like it used to be like Sunset.

[00:42:10]The thing is like on on on Sixth Street like you can go all the way down to West Six or you can go all the way down to East Six. So it's so big.

[00:42:20]>> Yeah. And it's just a real tourist attraction. And so many people now are coming to Austin like just for the comedy.

[00:42:26]>> I know. I I was just talking about this on one or two episodes ago, but they I was watching um not Family Feud. It was Price is Right.

[00:42:38]>> Price is Right.

[00:42:39]>> And the the trip they won was a trip to Austin.

[00:42:42]>> Yeah.

[00:42:43]>> I was like, what?

[00:42:44]>> But [laughter] it's cool though. Like if you if you like take yourself out of the equation and you just like comedy, you know, like you can really get deep into like, okay, I'mma go to this club, then I'mma go to this club. And like if that's what you like to do, I mean, I get it, you know? Like, >> yeah, especially if you already been out here a bunch of times or New York. New York has the seller. They they've got a ton of shows.

[00:43:08]I feel like out here they're more it's more like people are kind of spoiled for shows cuz there's so many like the Improv, the Laugh Factory, the store, they're all six minute drive from each other.

[00:43:19]>> All of them. You can walk to the Laugh Factory from the store, right?

[00:43:22]>> You can. Yeah. It's not that >> around that it's around that corner.

[00:43:26]>> Yeah.

[00:43:26]>> I like the fact that I mean it's so it's historical out here. You know those places you just named Laugh Factory, comedy store, improv.

[00:43:34]>> Yeah. Now Austin is writing his own history with the Mothership, the Creek, Sunset, you got Black Rabbit, you know, like the same clubs. We all play the same clubs.

[00:43:44]>> Yeah.

[00:43:44]>> So like once people realize that, they like, "Oh, I couldn't get into the mothership, but I can go to Sunset and I probably see the same guy." You know, >> it is great having that overflow. Like that's kind of how I feel about the Belly Room. I know it is the comedy store, but somebody described the store to me as like three separate clubs. And I always that always resonated with me where it's like the original room, the main room, and the belly room are like three separate clubs.

[00:44:11]>> Do you like I never I did the belly room with Steve Fury.

[00:44:15]>> I love that room.

[00:44:16]>> Yeah, that was fun.

[00:44:17]>> It's small. So like if I'm going to run a weekly there, it's going to take me a while to sell it out every week or so as an example of like that if the main room sells out.

[00:44:28]>> Yeah. the overflow from that will for sure sell out the belly room. The belly room and that's kind of I feel like what you're describing in Austin like the mothership's going to sell out.

[00:44:36]>> Oh yeah. Then everybody comes somewhere else. Oh that's exactly how it >> it kind of just it all feeds itself and it's like a good thriving ecosystem.

[00:44:43]>> Is the original room uh is that a pop more popular room than the belly room?

[00:44:48]>> It's hard to say like if it's more popular. I would say yes, but they're they're all awesome. Yeah, >> the original room I'd say is because that was the comedy store. Like it used to just be that room. That's that's why they call it the original room.

[00:45:03]>> What?

[00:45:03]>> It was just one one room and then and then I believe the story goes that she added on the main room >> and then the belly room came last.

[00:45:13]>> Nice. I mean like just the history like I like to hear those guys who from LA talk about like stuff from way back in the days. You know Dave Wester?

[00:45:22]>> No. He he got a what is it called?

[00:45:26]>> Eye patcher.

[00:45:27]>> Uh >> wooden leg.

[00:45:28]>> What is it that Martin L that Martin Phillips has?

[00:45:31]>> Oh uh special needs.

[00:45:33]>> Yeah, he but I want to I want to know the name. I I don't want to say the wrong one. But but I think >> the R word. [laughter] >> No, they're not the R word. But he has that as well. But he used to be a door guy at the store.

[00:45:46]>> Oh, you know what? I don't know this guy, but I saw his stand up and he's so funny. Yeah, Dave is a fool. He Man, I can listen to Dave Wester talk about the comedy store all day long. It's so funny.

[00:46:00]>> Shout out Martin Phillips, by the way.

[00:46:01]Also hilarious.

[00:46:02]>> Yeah, Martin doing Killer Killers of Kilani together.

[00:46:06]>> Yeah, Friday we doing Tucson and uh Saturday Portland.

[00:46:10]>> This won't come out by then, but I hope uh gosh, I hope if any of my listeners from Tucson saw you.

[00:46:16]>> Yeah, that'd be pretty cool.

[00:46:17]>> Yeah, cuz that's my hometown, Arizona.

[00:46:20]Tucson, I believe they got what? Uh they got a couple comedy clubs over there, right? Anyone called the Laugh something?

[00:46:27]>> They got Laughs out there. Old school.

[00:46:28]Real old school club.

[00:46:30]>> Laughs.

[00:46:30]>> And uh they got they got like a bunch of there's some bar shows out there that I want to do.

[00:46:37]>> I think it would be cool to just go in there and do some like smaller venues, sell them out. Like uh I don't know. I I love the comedy club, you know, in the sense that like all your needs are catered to.

[00:46:51]>> Yep. It's so beautiful. Like a bar show is like it ain't no green room. You better just >> Yeah. But sometimes it could be there's like an energy to that.

[00:46:59]>> You know, you know a good It's not a bar show cuz it's a comedy club, but it's in a bar. It's a place called Sisphus Brewing in Minnesota. You ever did that?

[00:47:09]>> Sounds really familiar.

[00:47:10]>> They give you 100% of the door, too.

[00:47:12]>> Oh, yeah. A lot of those shows will.

[00:47:14][laughter] >> Yeah. But but no, no, but it's like it's a club over.

[00:47:17]>> You shouldn't say that on here. Are you sure they give that to everybody?

[00:47:20]>> I'm pretty sure. Yeah, cuz they don't give It's a lot of uh >> The last half of the pot is us just telling our deals at a different club.

[00:47:27]>> Well, my [laughter] bad. Yeah, you're right. I forgot we was See how comfortable I am. I'm just having a comfortable conversation >> cuz you smoke that old joint.

[00:47:34]>> Whole old joint. That joint was That joint was older than >> We were riffing so fast at the beginning of the podcast then and then we had that 1 milligram. Now we're all like chilled back in.

[00:47:45]>> Yeah, that milligram kind of strong.

[00:47:47]>> That milligram stinks up on you.

[00:47:49]>> Is the milligram old, too?

[00:47:51]>> No, that's new.

[00:47:52]>> Okay. All right.

[00:47:52]>> Check this out. I for I almost forgot. I sure guess this. [laughter] >> You ever see this before?

[00:48:01]>> Can I see if I can do it?

[00:48:02]>> Oh yeah.

[00:48:03]>> Oh my god. [laughter] Have you seen that before?

[00:48:10]>> I think I seen one in the 80s.

[00:48:12][laughter] >> Yeah. See, and the younger guests I have on here are like, "Whoa, what is that?"

[00:48:17]They never even seen it. It's so funny.

[00:48:23]>> I've had it my whole life.

[00:48:24]>> That's pretty cool.

[00:48:25]>> I got a lot of old stuff in here.

[00:48:27]>> Yeah, a lot of old stuff. Um, the sign is new and I gotta mention it because this I think is the first episode we have ever showcasing it.

[00:48:38]>> Jet Fuel.

[00:48:39]>> Yeah, >> nice. The one with me on it.

[00:48:41]>> Yeah, it Ted Ted Moon made it and he's made Rogan has a sign by this guy.

[00:48:47]>> That thing is nice.

[00:48:48]>> Uh, Theo Vaughn uh I just did a show in Emerald City that uh standing in Seattle and they have a big sign that's by the same guy. He's an artist in Vancouver.

[00:48:58]Nice. and he sent this to me and he's I I met him through bad friends like we're friends but he he's sent it to me and it lights up and I've been meaning to put it up forever. I got the wrong screws.

[00:49:07]There's a lot of holes in that wall.

[00:49:09]>> Where you going to put it at?

[00:49:10]>> I'm right here.

[00:49:11]>> Okay. I thought you going to put it somewhere else. Oh, this is the first time it's been up. Period.

[00:49:14]>> Nice.

[00:49:15]>> Yeah, we just hung it.

[00:49:16]>> Well, you got to slide over. You got to So you can show it, you know. Let them know.

[00:49:20]>> It's on camera.

[00:49:21]>> Oh, they can see it. Like they can see it.

[00:49:23]>> Even with that. Okay.

[00:49:24]>> Yeah, it's movie magic.

[00:49:26]>> Nice. Look in that camera. I'll give you another monle. [laughter] >> Can I get a Can I get an iPad like a like a pirate?

[00:49:33]>> Okay.

[00:49:35]>> Who lives under a pineapple under [laughter] the sea?

[00:49:41]>> Something like that.

[00:49:42]>> Spongebob Squarepants. That was a great show, man.

[00:49:46]>> Yeah. Oh, man. I wish we were watching that.

[00:49:49]>> Do you Do you think right now you can enjoy a good episode of Spongebob still?

[00:49:53]>> Yeah. I remember really liking that show well into high school and my mom being like, "You're too old for this show and then I would watch it still in college and then and then she was watching it one day."

[00:50:05]>> Yeah.

[00:50:06]>> I just see you like it.

[00:50:07]>> Yeah. It's a good show.

[00:50:08]>> It's funny.

[00:50:08]>> It ain't too much thinking, man. People want to overthink stuff and break it down, man. Just enjoy the moment.

[00:50:13]>> Who's overthinking Spongebob?

[00:50:15]>> Some people do. Like they tried to cancel Spongebob.

[00:50:18]>> Who did?

[00:50:18]>> They said that uh what's her name?

[00:50:20]>> Sandy.

[00:50:21]>> Sandy. Yeah. They say she was a pervert.

[00:50:25]She tried to take Spongebob on one episode.

[00:50:27]>> Really?

[00:50:28]>> Yeah.

[00:50:28]>> Some people said I sound like Sandy Cheeks.

[00:50:31]>> Nah, you don't have a southern accent.

[00:50:33]>> That's right.

[00:50:34]>> Yeah.

[00:50:34]>> Well, y'all >> say y'all.

[00:50:37]>> Close your eyes.

[00:50:38]>> Y'all, Spongebob, [laughter] >> you got to say y'all.

[00:50:43]>> Y'all.

[00:50:44]>> Yeah. Now you sound like Sandy a little just like her.

[00:50:46]>> If you say y'all, cuz you know Sandy was from Dallas.

[00:50:50]>> That's right. Yeah. And then, well, anyway, I don't want to get into any conspiracies.

[00:50:56]>> Yeah, it's a lot of them going out about those Sandy.

[00:50:59]>> That's that sucks cuz she's a cartoon.

[00:51:02]>> Yeah.

[00:51:03]>> Yeah.

[00:51:03]>> It sucks that people got so much time on their hand to break these things down.

[00:51:07]>> Yeah. [snorts] I wonder where all that comes from. Like that feeling of I'm trying to think the last time I felt offended.

[00:51:14]I felt discriminated against. Like that that feeling, but I think that's different than offended.

[00:51:20]>> Yeah. Discrimination is like Yeah. Cuz offended could come from different angles. Discriminated is you just telling me you think you like I'm a like you think I'm a piece of crap. You know what I mean?

[00:51:32]>> Yeah. Or Yeah. Or just not like Yeah. A person >> or like you better than me.

[00:51:36]>> I hate that feeling.

[00:51:37]>> Yeah.

[00:51:38]>> But I feel like offended is like you're mad about how somebody might feel.

[00:51:45]>> Right.

[00:51:45]>> Yeah.

[00:51:46]>> What's Can you look up definition of offended? A lot of people >> I think we the listeners and viewers right now are witnessing two people who do not get offended.

[00:51:55]>> Yeah, I don't get offended at all. You can't offend me, man. I I try not to >> even my comments the the hate comments I've recognized now. I'm such a logical person that they're just helping my algorithm.

[00:52:06]>> Yeah.

[00:52:07]>> Like I don't get offended by them and and I get so many pos I'd rather have the positive comments just to say that.

[00:52:13]But like they're all just It's not I don't hold attachment to it.

[00:52:18]>> Yeah. It's just haters.

[00:52:20]>> Yeah.

[00:52:20]>> Like I can't lie. Like sometimes if if my phone rings and I see a comment that's like some hate, I'll go to the person and if they got like a fake whatever, I delete it. You can't you're not going to get a any shine or likes if you can't at least put your real face up. Like if you put your real face up and you don't have your your your page blocked and whatever crazy stuff [snorts] you saying.

[00:52:44]>> Yeah.

[00:52:45]>> You not you don't mind somebody going underneath there and finding your name and your address and where your kids go to school at.

[00:52:52]>> You sound offended though.

[00:52:54]>> No, I'm just saying I'm not [laughter] offended. I'm just like don't hide.

[00:52:58]Whatever you want to say, say it like a >> I think some of them are bots because they'll say >> they got hater bots. I think so because what does a hater do? Boosts algorithm engagement. Yeah, >> people love to go to the comments to see if somebody's hating on it, right?

[00:53:14]>> So that's I could see like a Meta or a company like that in like oh how do we increase engagement like send out these bots, >> man? They come after me. Like now the more people that I got, the more following that I get, those bots are coming because at first the DeAndre's was just funny. Nobody got offended.

[00:53:35]>> I'm glad you brought DeAndre's up. Those videos are so funny.

[00:53:38]>> Yeah, cuz it's like it's just silly, man. It's stupid. If you get offended by that, then you're crazy.

[00:53:43]>> Can we play one?

[00:53:44]>> Oh, yeah.

[00:53:44]>> Okay, you'll send it to me.

[00:53:46]>> Okay. Yeah, I got you.

[00:53:47]>> We'll put it right here.

[00:53:48]>> You waited last minute to get that bird?

[00:53:50]WELL, YOU IN LUCK. COME ON DOWN TO THE ANDRE TURKEY TRUCK.

[00:53:56]White people keep on burning down their goddamn house trying to fry a turkey. My cousin had an ice cream truck. I told him, "Hey, let me borrow that." I wrote turkey on the side of it and I'm bringing a turkey to them. Man, I even changed the ice cream song to fit the season.

[00:54:12]>> Potatoes, tomatoes, chicken, turkey, >> you name IT. WE GOT TURKEYS WITH ALL RACES. WE GOT MEXICAN TURKEY. THEY COME IN FLAMING HOT and taheen. Man, you can taste the taheen. That's good, man.

[00:54:23]That's good. WE GOT BLACK TURKEYS. IT'S SEASONED WITH LEMON PEPPER, SEASONED SALT, LRIES. MAN, that [ __ ] so salty.

[00:54:30]Just looking at it will make your BLOOD PRESSURE GO SKYHIGH. WE EVEN GOT CHINESE TURKEYS.

[00:54:37]Shut up. Boichi, [ __ ] >> Our family dog ran away, so DeAndre let me keep one of the Chinese turkeys before he COOKED IT.

[00:54:45]>> LANE, YOUR TURKEY READY.

[00:54:48]WE EVEN GOT WHITE TURKEY, MAN. IT'S JUST A TURKEY with mayonnaise and raisins in it cuz I don't know what the white people eat, you know.

[00:54:55]>> Deandre, can I have one of the black turkeys?

[00:54:57]>> Hell no. I'll eat your ra >> place sucks.

[00:55:00]>> Act now cuz if you WAIT TILL THE LAST DAY, ALL THE TURKEYS GOING TO BE $5,000 plus gratuitity. We going to run out of turkeys on the last day. But it ain't going to be NOTHING BUT TWO BIG ASS CHICKENS tied together. Dope money fold, [ __ ] We got your sides, too. Mashed potatoes, macaroni, CHITLINS, MAFUNGO, AND EVERY KIND OF CASSEROLE THAT YOU WHITE PEOPLE EAT. MARRIED. I take everything. Apple Pay, Bitcoin, EBT, SNAP PAYMENT. I EVEN TAKE A LITTLE SIDE of Hey girl, you ever had your boot hole licked in THE BACK OF A TURKEY TRUCK?

[00:55:38]Everything ain't about the money. People snap benefits up. They just want to be with their families around this time of the year. HEY, GET YOUR DIRT [screaming] ASS AWAY FROM MY GODDAMN TRUCK. [ __ ] HEY, YOU LOOK DIRTY MOTHER. I'M TRYING TO DO SOME HARD THOUGH [ __ ] SOMEBODY GOT TO DISCIPLINE these white kids cuz y'all damn sure AIN'T LITTLE DIRT ASS FINGERS ALL OVER MY COUSIN TRUCK. YOU GOING TO BE A PART OF A CRIME SCENE MOTHER. DAMN. That might be one that might be the one for the for the holidays there, huh? [laughter] >> Happy Thanksgiving, people.

[00:56:11]>> That was so funny.

[00:56:14]>> Oh, that was good. [laughter] >> Good times.

[00:56:17]>> Good times, man. So, do you have uh you have well Brea tomorrow, but you this will come out after.

[00:56:24]>> Oh, yeah. Then uh August 1st and 2nd.

[00:56:26]I'm in Oklahoma.

[00:56:28]>> Wait, wait, wait. You're I'm not I I was going to do something where maybe we just pretend like you already did Brea and we talk about how great it was.

[00:56:34]>> Oh, yeah. Brea Improv was great. It was sold out, man.

[00:56:37]>> It was awesome.

[00:56:38]>> It was amazing.

[00:56:39]>> I read about it. Yeah, >> they wrote articles.

[00:56:41]>> They wrote articles in the LA Times.

[00:56:42]That's how good it was.

[00:56:43]>> It was awesome.

[00:56:44]>> Yeah. Um, but if you want to promote anything, look right in that camera right there and promote anything. Uh, any shows, your website, all that stuff.

[00:56:52]>> Oh, okay. You can go to hired deandre.com. That's where you can like put your own idea for a job for DeAndre.

[00:57:01]Uh, Punchuplive backdavid Jolly. That's where all my tour dates. Um, yeah.

[00:57:07]August 1st and 2nd, I'm in Oklahoma, Oklahoma City, Tulsa. I'm in uh Talk of the Moon Comedy Club in Pensacola. I'm in Brickies. You can see them all there.

[00:57:18]I got like probably like I got a lot of dates for the end of the year. Lot of Helium, Atlanta, Indianapolis, Philly and Pittsburgh. August 12th and 13th. Make sure you go to those.

[00:57:29]>> We We'll put the dates up there. I love Brickies, by the way.

[00:57:32]>> Oh, you I never did it. I heard it was great.

[00:57:34]>> It's great. And they It's a small club, but they people working there. They work there like they're at the mothership or the comedy stuff.

[00:57:42]>> Yeah. You know, you ever did uh Go Bananas in in Ohio?

[00:57:46]>> I never got to do that. I just started being able to go headline in Ohio, so I haven't done a lot of the venues there, >> but um But is it similar or >> Well, it's Go Bananas in Yeah, it's in uh Cincinnati. Small club. Like it's a mom and a son that work there. Great people, man. Just a good time.

[00:58:06]>> Yeah, the people were were so great.

[00:58:08]They kind of got their own built-in audience.

[00:58:11]>> That's great.

[00:58:12]>> They don't really have to advertise that people are coming no matter who it is.

[00:58:16]>> That's awesome.

[00:58:17]>> Yeah, I'll definitely go back to that club. There's so many great spots in that part of the country.

[00:58:21]>> Oh, yeah. It's I like the Midwest because the Midwest don't get offended.

[00:58:25]People go to work and they go home and they take care of their family. Is it funny? That's all they asking, you know?

[00:58:31]>> Yeah. They they're doing a lot working.

[00:58:33]They work all day and then they just want to have a good time. It's like I can appreciate and respect that.

[00:58:37]>> Yeah. In any city where you could get in a fist fight and you don't get the police called on you, it's just a good old squabble and then we go our separate ways. That's an American city. That's how America used to be, you know.

[00:58:49]>> Well, we And when we go beat up that comic at the comedy store, >> he's getting it.

[00:58:53]>> And no one's calling security.

[00:58:55]>> Nobody. No, you Jessie.

[00:58:56]>> My name is on the wall.

[00:58:57]>> You better believe it. YOU KNOW WHO NAME THIS IS. IF A DOOR GUY walk up to you and say, "Jessie, get it together." You got to say, "YOU KNOW WHO NAME THIS IS?"

[00:59:05]>> I'M GOING TO WEAR THIS SHIRT.

[00:59:06]>> AH, YEAH. I'm going to I'm going to let everyone know.

[00:59:09]>> Do you know who I am? I do. Don't do this.

[00:59:12]>> What do you think first thing is like straight to the face?

[00:59:16]>> Or maybe maybe you get a couple gut gut shots [laughter] to work them out. Work out the bread basket.

[00:59:22]>> Okay. And but then what if they I got to block my face.

[00:59:26]>> Well, yeah. That's why you got like once you hit somebody in the side, they going down. That's worse than a face punch.

[00:59:33]>> Really?

[00:59:34]>> Yeah. Bread basket. That's your win.

[00:59:36]Well, you call this the bread basket.

[00:59:38]>> You call everybody's, right?

[00:59:39]>> Yeah. Everybody. This all bread basket.

[00:59:41]Men and women.

[00:59:42]>> Okay.

[00:59:43]>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I know you're a feminist.

[00:59:45]>> I like bread basket cuz when you're pregnant, it's a bun in the oven.

[00:59:48]>> M I thought you were going to say because of Red Lobster. Cheddar Bay Biscuits.

[00:59:52]>> When you're pregnant.

[00:59:53]>> Yeah. They love them. Pregnant women love Cheddar Bay Biscuit.

[00:59:56]>> Oh, I mean, Call me pregnant.

[00:59:58]>> No. Well, yeah, everybody. [laughter] Well, call me pregnant, too.

[01:00:00]>> My aunt got the recipe to those and made them. You know that they they got a box in stores for Red Lobster. Like the >> they do.

[01:00:08]>> You gotta make it. You got to make them.

[01:00:10]But they got the boxes. Yeah.

[01:00:12]>> Oh, I thought you were like, you got to make it to have your own boxes in the store like that. I'm like, yeah, you better believe it.

[01:00:16]>> Oh, you with my face on it like this.

[01:00:18]>> DeAndre's buttered biscuits.

[01:00:20]>> Buttered [laughter] biscuits. DeAndre's buttered biscuits.

[01:00:25]>> Well, we usually end every episode with a song and the guest will sing about things we talked about over the episode.

[01:00:32]>> Okay. Oh, but I have all this music here. Did you ever play music?

[01:00:36]>> Yeah, I played uh the alto saxophone in middle school.

[01:00:38]>> That's right. Why'd you quit?

[01:00:41]>> Cuz I went to high school and uh they used to haze at my high school and I'm not like you not going to just beat me up. So like I went to summer band camp, eighth grade going to ninth and all the altos were like, "Hey, you going to do this?" And I'm not really a person that's going to be like, "Oh yeah, your s." I'm I've never been that person. So they would try to fight me and then I would fight them and I'm like 112 pounds.

[01:01:06]>> What were they trying to get you to do?

[01:01:08]>> Like you can't tell me to do anything.

[01:01:11]>> They were like uh >> like yeah do this you stupid freshman, you know, and like do this and do that.

[01:01:16]And I'm like no. Then they'll try to fight and then I'm like I'm out there swinging.

[01:01:20]>> Dang, that's crazy.

[01:01:22]>> I mean but our high school never got in trouble for it, but like a bunch of colleges over on the west on the east coast got in trouble for it. I never like that kind of u I I respect and understand a hierarchy and why it exists in certain places, but you don't need to do more than that. Like this the whole idea of like >> like I'm a paid regular. I'm not going to treat the door guys like [ __ ] Yeah.

[01:01:47]>> Like I already have the thing I got.

[01:01:50]Like you know >> they they already have it hard enough.

[01:01:53]You know >> I hate hierarchies.

[01:01:55]>> Yeah.

[01:01:55]>> I think it's disgusting.

[01:01:58]>> Yeah. I just want to get high.

[01:01:59][laughter] Like I never I never really fit into too many systems. I'mma buck the system if anything.

[01:02:05]>> You're what? Above you.

[01:02:06]>> I'mma buck it. I'mma be like, "Fuck your system. I'mma do what I want to do."

[01:02:10]>> Yeah.

[01:02:10]>> You know what I mean? Like you never going to make me feel bad cuz I treat everybody good. I don't care who you are. If a homeless person come up, if a unhoused person come up and talk to me, then I'mma I'mma I'mma talk to you. Like I treat everybody the same.

[01:02:23]>> What if Hitler came up to you?

[01:02:26]>> He's dead. So >> what if deadler came up to you?

[01:02:30]>> Whoa. I'd be freaking out. I'd probably be on mushrooms with some of that old ass weed. I don't know what happened.

[01:02:35][laughter] >> You'll be like closer.

[01:02:37]>> No, I'm going just be like I don't know.

[01:02:39]That's a good question. Like >> I tried to ask the hard-hitting questions right before we get out of here.

[01:02:44]>> Yeah, those are the [laughter] ones that count, man.

[01:02:46]>> I got you off your toes.

[01:02:47]>> I'm not going to hang out with him. You know, >> I got nervous for a second when I saw your reaction to my question. I was like, should I have not asked that? What would you do if Hitler came up to you and say, "Play me a song."

[01:02:58]>> I would. Yes, sir. [laughter] >> Yeah, cuz he probably got a knife on him.

[01:03:01]>> Yeah, I'd be scared of him. I'd be pretty scared of Hitler.

[01:03:04]>> I'd be That mustache she had is creepy as hell.

[01:03:08]>> Right to the bread basket.

[01:03:09]>> Right to the bread [laughter] basket.

[01:03:11]Come here, Hitler. You piece of [ __ ] >> Me and David Jolly going to beat up Hitler.

[01:03:17]>> You're going to beat the hell out of Hitler. Send [laughter] him back to that grave.

[01:03:20]>> That would be awesome.

[01:03:21]>> Kicking Hitler ass. Yeah, >> they should have a video game out called Kick Hitler's ass >> and it's we're the characters. Yeah, >> you can play one or the other.

[01:03:30]>> Am I coaching you? I'm coaching you.

[01:03:32]Then I get in and give him a little workout, too.

[01:03:34]>> Yeah, I think it's like like you're player one, I'm like you're Mario, I'm Luigi, we go in there, I'm player two.

[01:03:41]>> Is it a whole game where we like we get jump out of a helicopter then we're in Nazi Germany and then we just start killing Nazis?

[01:03:48]>> You played it?

[01:03:49]>> Wow.

[01:03:51]We might be able to get some money off of this.

[01:03:53]>> Dude, that one milligram is kicking in.

[01:03:55]>> Yeah, [laughter] >> I think that Can you write that down?

[01:03:58]>> Kick. It's already in.

[01:03:59]>> Yeah. Kick Hitler the video game.

[01:04:01]>> Yeah. Kick Hitler's butt the video game.

[01:04:03]I know the last 15 minutes. You don't really want to get too wild with the uh words neither.

[01:04:08]>> Oh >> yeah. Like somebody told me that that's like really >> Oh, who's woke now? [laughter] >> No, I mean for the YouTube algorithm.

[01:04:17]>> Um God, the algorithm, man.

[01:04:20]It's crazy.

[01:04:21]>> You got to figure it out.

[01:04:22]>> I know. You're right. I like your mentality about things because it's not like a There's no use in complaining about it. You just got to switch gears and abide by it.

[01:04:32]>> Go to another level and turn it up and don't turn it off.

[01:04:36]>> And we'll just talk about cinnamon and snowflakes for the last 15.

[01:04:38]>> I like cinnamon.

[01:04:39]>> I like snowflakes.

[01:04:41]>> Snowflakes. [laughter] What's your Does it snow in Tucson?

[01:04:44]>> Actually, it it does in certain parts.

[01:04:47]Like there's a famous mountain there, Mount Lemon, and it's >> a lemon based on the guy's a lady's name.

[01:04:54]>> Cuz I went to Flag Staff and it was like up here.

[01:04:58]>> I lived in Flagstaff for a year.

[01:04:59]>> Nice. It was a It's a small small town.

[01:05:02]>> Yeah, they when I went there in uh 2008, they said the whole town was a third of the population of the ASU uh enrollment.

[01:05:11]>> Dang. The whole college of Arizona State was three times as big as the town of Flagstaff.

[01:05:17]>> And the crazy part is it take like what an hour or two to get there from Phoenix, right?

[01:05:22]>> Yeah. Two hours.

[01:05:23]>> But one hour is going up the mountain.

[01:05:26]>> I know.

[01:05:27]>> That's crazy.

[01:05:28]>> I got a speeding a couple speeding tickets up there. Yeah.

[01:05:31]>> I'm afraid I wouldn't drive up there. I would let somebody else drive. I'm afraid of that.

[01:05:35]>> Really?

[01:05:36]>> Yeah. That mountain and turning and nah.

[01:05:38]>> Yeah. But my friend Katie can't handle that stuff. Like w windy roads. I don't mind it.

[01:05:44]>> No, that's too >> She'll be grabbing onto the car.

[01:05:47]>> Yeah, it's I don't know. I've seen too many movies, you know.

[01:05:51]>> I like it. I love driving.

[01:05:53]>> You like driving. So you always the one Are you going to drive tomorrow? Or did you drive to Burbank?

[01:05:58]>> Yeah, I I drove [laughter] to Bakersfield and it was incredible.

[01:06:02]>> Nice.

[01:06:03]>> Sold out show.

[01:06:04]>> Nice. You better believe it.

[01:06:06]>> Yay. Uh Johanna Koka, Joel Jimenez, Cameron Frost >> killed it.

[01:06:12]>> Murder.

[01:06:12]>> Murdered.

[01:06:13]>> You better believe it.

[01:06:14]>> And uh and then I destroyed.

[01:06:15]>> You know, I know it. They gave you a standing note and they walked you out of there like this on their shoulders.

[01:06:21]>> They they almost didn't let me leave.

[01:06:23]>> Nice.

[01:06:23]>> I got laid. I [ __ ] A FAN.

[01:06:25]>> NICE. HELL YEAH.

[01:06:27]>> GREAT.

[01:06:29]>> Good times. I try to I try to stay away from that cuz usually it be like some old soccer mom. And >> you tried in Brea, I remember.

[01:06:38]>> Nope. Nope. Nope. Cuz I got a girlfriend. I didn't try to try.

[01:06:42]>> Well, well, she tried.

[01:06:43]>> Yeah, she tried it. I was like, >> you were like, "Get off of me."

[01:06:46]>> Yeah. You Your ass was nothing compared >> to my girl with that fat ass. Get out of here, Denise.

[01:06:52][laughter] >> Well, Brian Bakersfield, they'll never be the same. [clears throat] >> Never. I don't even know. It might be still burnt down right now, you know.

[01:07:01]>> Oh, don't say that out here. A lot of fires going on.

[01:07:04]>> Oh. [laughter] Oh, I forgot about that.

[01:07:06]>> Before we get into the song, can you lower your mic a little bit?

[01:07:09]>> Oh, it's a block in his face.

[01:07:10]>> Yeah.

[01:07:11]>> Thank you for saying that.

[01:07:12]>> Fixing it in the last five minutes.

[01:07:14]>> Fell.

[01:07:15]>> I'm glad you said something. Oh, can we redo the whole thing?

[01:07:19]>> Sure.

[01:07:19]>> No, just kidding. [laughter] So easy going, man.

[01:07:22]>> Let's do it.

[01:07:23]>> Well, let's see. I got all these beats here, like a hundred. And I have funk and rock and disco. I can punk. I can play any of them.

[01:07:33]You could pick one.

[01:07:37][music] >> Yeah, that's like a Sublime beat. You know that I'm on Sublime album, >> their [music] new album.

[01:07:43]>> What are you talking about?

[01:07:44]>> I'm on it.

[01:07:44]>> What do you mean?

[01:07:45]>> They got me on the new Sublime album talking.

[01:07:48]>> What do you That's badass.

[01:07:50]>> That's like the coolest thing ever. I would love to be on a like a musician's album just talking.

[01:07:56]>> Yeah. Well, it was like something I said on Kill Tony. I was like, "Sublime is the greatest band of all time." And they put it in >> it's on their album and I was like I die on that mountain. Like everybody [laughter] just >> No, I was saying like Sublime is the greatest band of all time and then I said like yeah I'll die on that on that mountain. Yeah.

[01:08:15]>> And then they were like yeah in the back.

[01:08:17]>> That's badass.

[01:08:18]>> Yeah. I like I like Sublime. I'm a big fan of those.

[01:08:21]>> They're great. Um, [music] I don't know any sublime.

[01:08:31]>> You know what's so cool about like the trombone is it's only three notes. Well, I mean it's more when you the more >> it's a trumpet.

[01:08:37]>> Trumpet. Same thing.

[01:08:38]>> Can't believe you just >> Same [laughter] thing. I'm kidding.

[01:08:41]>> But but don't you got to make your lips go like >> and it make different sounds.

[01:08:45]>> It's like a whistling.

[01:08:48]>> Yeah.

[01:08:48]>> Yeah.

[01:08:50]And that that that uh where your finger is in the front. That's >> this one.

[01:08:55]>> Yeah.

[01:08:55]>> This is a third valve slide that any trumpet player watching is probably so mad at me because I never use it.

[01:09:01]>> I I was raised I was I was taught to use it and I would use it religiously. But since bringing it on stage a lot of times now I'm playing with my right hand and holding the microphone with my left hand.

[01:09:13]>> And so I've gotten into some very bad habits.

[01:09:16]>> Oh, I feel you.

[01:09:17]>> But whatever. I was first in state in 2008. So y'all can suck it.

[01:09:21]>> Suck it. [laughter] 2008.

[01:09:24]>> Third valve. This.

[01:09:25]>> You better believe it.

[01:09:26]>> My ring figure.

[01:09:28]>> Oh, you you were in like the the the state symphony band. Is that how that is?

[01:09:33]>> Like all of the high schools in the land of Arizona. We'll go audition and I got I was the best trumpet player.

[01:09:40]>> Nice.

[01:09:40]>> In 2008.

[01:09:41]>> Nice.

[01:09:42]>> In front of the high school students.

[01:09:44]>> I [laughter] know. That's right. I know.

[01:09:45]That's good. That's real good. I was like really into playing like how I'm into comedy now. I was super like this is what I'm doing.

[01:09:52]>> Did you go to college for it?

[01:09:54]>> Yeah, I had a full ride.

[01:09:55]>> Where you went?

[01:09:56]>> Northern Arizona University in Flagstaff.

[01:09:58]>> For sure.

[01:09:59]>> Yeah. And then I dropped out and then I got another full ride to Mesa Community College.

[01:10:04]>> Where that's at? That's in Arizona, too.

[01:10:06]>> Yeah, in Mesa. Yeah.

[01:10:07]>> Oh, Mesa. Yeah. That's right by Phoenix, though, right?

[01:10:11]>> Yeah. Yeah. It's all really close. Yeah.

[01:10:13]Mesa, Chandler, Tempe. But okay, so wait, your [laughter] yours's kicking in, I think.

[01:10:20]>> Yeah, it's pretty it's it's working.

[01:10:22]>> We got to end with the song.

[01:10:24]>> Okay, let's do it.

[01:10:28]>> Go ahead.

[01:10:31]>> We're doing [music] a California, LA [singing] to be exact.

[01:10:42]I'mma go downtown [music] or Hollywood or whatever they call it and probably see some fun house people.

[01:10:57]>> You picked this track.

[01:10:58]>> Yeah. [laughter] >> Can we just count that as as being the song? I don't feel too >> You don't want You don't feel like singing?

[01:11:04]>> I I I don't feel too soulful. I'm kind of tired.

[01:11:08]Um, well, we never had another episode this way before.

[01:11:14][music] >> [music] [music]