Tooky’s Mag offers a sharp analysis of how military grimdark uses atmospheric world-building to achieve narrative depth without relying on traditional literary tropes. It effectively demonstrates that the technical rigor of genre fiction deserves the same critical scrutiny as high-brow literature.
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40: The Haunt on the Island of Esmer — 'The Darkest Dungeon of Fiction'本站添加:
Welcome to the Sidebar, a book club for relic hunters seeking gems. I'm David.
>> I am the diner mage Gabriel Sinclair.
You might know me as the father of the most popular uh episode in Cookies Mac history, Diner Goss. Half of you are probably from that channel, from that episode. Hello. I'm the reason half of you are here. And uh yeah, we're we're time to be time to hunt some gems with our Diner Goths [music] at our side. And I'm Capital Limo and I'm crossing state borders to get red leaf with lower excise taxes. And we're back to cover The Haunt on the island of Esmer by Justin Aw Blair. We're finally delving into fantasy. I've been itching for this for like over a year.
>> Itchy fantasy.
>> Itchy fantasy. And it is a genre I don't really have a lot of familiarity with.
What is it at a high level? What do you guys want to take take the the is what is fantasy in case in case you Hey, hey everyone. I know you're really into literary fiction, but let me tell you what genre fiction is. So, genre fiction is typically character-driven, but doesn't deal with deep themes uh and doesn't deal with the types of uh symbolic elements that literary fiction does.
>> Some there's a kid that read um Gene Wolf that's just screaming at you right now. [laughter] >> Yeah. Yeah. It also it's a it's a type of fiction that tends to have really shitty pros and nabakop would not approve of their pros.
>> There are many there are many genre writers who do have elevated themes who do have elevated pros. Um, but like typically genre genre is just a different thing uh than than literary fiction. And it's it's mostly vibes based, but there are certain sorts of rules of thumb we can observe to say, you know, what sort of category this belongs in.
>> While this is our first genre fiction we've covered.
Short stories we have, but we Yeah, not in terms of like novel format.
>> Yeah, I was right back to correct a narrative. We caught you live sundowning on Maine as the [laughter] cuz this is our this is actually our third one cuz we did Bizar.
>> Yeah.
>> Uh which unreal also Twin Candles masterpiece and we also did Auntie Auntie Leguin's piece.
>> Yes. But that wasn't fiction. She Ursula Leguin wrote, you should you should go back and listen to our our piece on Ursula Leguin's sort of conception of Elf Elfand versus Pikipsy. Ursula Leguin was early in doxing orc brand but um uh yeah she she is someone who actually if you are if you are interested in the topic of literary versus genre fiction uh Ursula Leguin is an excellent source for wellthoughtout um takes on that thing despite her uh gender handicap. Actually, Cap, I would like to ask you, would Luin approve just off the gate? Does this get the Mommy Laquin the seal of approval? Is this costume fantasy or is this like other type of fantasy? Is >> this Elfland? This I think I think this is Elfland.
>> Mhm.
>> Yeah. Yeah. Um, so, uh, despite despite the there are no elves in this, uh, it does not need to have elves in it to be Elfland.
>> Yeah. Um, >> anyway, if if you want a better explanation of that, go ahead and listen to our episode on on uh on the the King of Elfland.
>> And also to to clear the room a little bit, I like to say that the author Justin Blair is a founding tugger. You might know him. His work other than this is the amazing fan art he did of me a while back that I posted on X. Uh, so, uh, you know, usual rules of >> you're just, uh, [laughter] you're just saying the the art that they would know him for is the fan art he did of you, not that he he he was a winner for Passage Prize uh, in in visual art.
Once Upon a Moon.
>> He's a triple threat. Artist, writer, tugger.
>> All three.
>> Writer, tugger. and a great review and a great reviewer of Star Trek books as well. I subscribe to his channel. He's a great reviewer in his own right. Amazing thumbnails.
>> Uh that's right.
>> Yeah. So Blair is a triple threat. Now, of course, Passes Prize since they lack the ability to retweet uh reviews of those. Most people have not read the [laughter] Passage Prize.
>> That's right.
>> Uh but yeah, so Blair's a founding tugger. Now, usually the rules are you have to post an ad on the lip board to get a review from us or if you're of the fairest sex, you know, having allowing us access, particularly me, access to your reproductive organs, you know, it would be very cute if like a girl >> never it's never occurred. You've never [laughter] yet >> did you get did you get trapped like [laughter] >> Yeah, dude. It would be so cute. It would be a great romance story. Like an eirl email and DMs me on Twitter. We give it a bad review, but we end up hooking up anyway and we reminisce about it in our The ultimate negging is [ __ ] on a girl's book.
>> Yes, [laughter] dude. I could I could I'd be like Samo Chamberlain regailing my grandkids. Oh, yes. I remember [ __ ] You know, your grandmother thought herself a writer.
[laughter] Boy, did I stomp on that dream, kiddos.
>> Boy, did I stomp on that dream. Anyway, you're named >> that diner goth slop queen.
>> Anyway, you you my first daughter are named after named after the the prostitute I lost my [laughter] >> opportunity to prostitute. Earless prostitute.
>> Maria. [laughter] >> No, I would not I I would not lose my virginity to a black prostitute. I would be a a light-skinned casta cortisone.
Thank you very much. Hence, Maria.
>> Well, actually, so on the whole genre thing, I kind of want to dwell on that for a sec because for me, this was a new genre in a way, even though I love fantasy. I've read a buttload of fantasy, but I've never ever read I guess I've read grim dark fantasy, but not like this military grim dark genre that this falls into the black company genre.
>> Yes. Yes. This is very this I I one thing that I did want to say about this is that you know if you're going to make a for people who who have not read it and like don't want to get into the spoiler stuff like I would recommend this book but one of my you know I I I think I think this feels a lot like Glen Cook's Black Company um sort of with a uh with a new world uh new world sort Age of Exploration, concistador style uh vibes uh to it.
>> So, cigarettes.
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, everyone's smoking. It's great. It's great. It's great. It's very It's like lots of vibes, really good world building. Um uh it it is not heavy on the like fantasy um fantasy place names or random references to things that are uh not inferable.
Right. So he he he does he does good at avoiding the sort of Robert Jordanesque [ __ ] ass uh world building through inference. [laughter] >> Um >> Oh, we got to do Jordan some. Also, it does not have a map. It It does not have a map, sadly. It That's >> It does not have a map. It doesn't.
That's great. It doesn't need a map. It does not need a map.
>> Yeah. Cap, you and me have to do a a duo on uh Wheel of Time at some point. It's It's >> We'll do We'll do fantasy cgraphy at some point.
>> Even the character names actually to your point, Cap, is not fantasy. It's like, "So, uh, what do you call the wizard? You call him wizard. What do you call Lookout? His name is Lookout."
>> So, like there's a SC Well, all so all of these guys are working off of nicknames.
>> Yeah.
>> Which is which is similar, by the way, to So, um, Glen Cook, Black Company, virtually every character in the Black Company, at least in the early books, is just known by a nickname. It's just like a nickname that they've gotten over the years. And I think that's a really good strategy for showing uh history between characters, right? It it it's a it's a a layer on top of dialogue um that helps you sort of, you know, define the character with a little bit of a stereotype, but also convey how the other characters um view them, right?
And so, you know, there's a character who gets a lot of who gets a lot of perspective and is one of the earlier right um um perspective characters named Scrolls >> who is a you know, basically like a a rich kid fail son who dropped out of dropped out of university to go be an adventurer. And he's a genius, right?
He's he's you know a total a speaker of many languages >> and but he's also but he like sort of left that life to go like join this mercenary treasure hunting band >> right who's who's been disgraced >> so [clears throat] >> for real >> um >> and uh yeah so that that's just just one example but yeah it is it is very reminiscent of the black company in in a good way.
>> Uh, and the the theming the theming is >> the dialogue has uh to your point uh they they end like commands and requests with like tags like military tags. What they don't say over but it's similar to over. Um so there's a lot like flavor too. we get a sense of like their background because most of our pro protagonists are from the the the ninth some sort of ruined betrayed member of this army of uh of the throne lands which is sort of like the main yeah one of the few sort of like fantasy terms that gets thrown out a lot um and they're sort of they're disgraced treasure hunters kind of struggling to find their way in this on this the aisle of Esmer this like you said cap this kind of Cubaesque uh location And you know, one one thing I want to say before we got into, man, this would be a good this this is like this is like a good D and D game. I don't mean this in a negative way, but this would be a great setting for Dungeons and Dragons or something like something like that.
>> My um my mental my mental map is that they're on uh is that they're actually on Hispanola.
>> And this this took this this actually takes place 10 years in the future in Haiti. So this is just [laughter] this is just Haiti.
>> Yeah. This is what Casto futurism looks like, folks. All the all the vaxs become doms.
>> Yeah, [laughter and clears throat] there is there is you know what Justin Blair despite being a a powerful chud has given uh given a voice and a place of privilege to a to a brown kid. Uh the the smartest Dominican the smartest Dominican ever born. uh and his and his homie who is just like a uh >> a wigger >> sort of a a pie in the Yeah, he's like a pie in the sky wigger who wants to be a knight, right?
>> Yeah.
>> And it seems it seems like it seems like it might actually work out for both of them. So, >> and don't forget their donkey. They also have a pet.
>> Yeah, they're great. They're they're the emotional.
>> It does not have the voices that Yeah.
Sadly, it's not voice anymore. It would be make a great companion. Maybe we can do a Tookie Mag live campaign special live play. We can we can we could do it with Black Logs games, right? We can we can we could dominate the the Eight uh tabletop market.
>> Oh, yeah. Yeah. Steve uh was it Steve Bushi? Mini Bushami. Young Call me.
>> Hello, fellow.
>> You got to call me. But um >> wait, wait. No, we could do it in the fatal system. We could do it. We could easily port this into the fatal system.
This actually would really work well in the fatal system.
>> Okay. Okay.
>> Because everyone hates everyone.
Everyone wants to like eat everybody or rape some. Well, actually, there's no rape. It's actually nicely rape free.
Um, >> this is a total This is a honestly the book >> people just want to eat people.
>> This book has this book. This book has total like crossover potential. It could have been conventionally published. this would to you know if if this was if this was 1978 and to and Delray still published white men um this would have gotten picked up instantaneously >> actually no it's not it's not it's not horny enough actually keeps the horniness down so >> yeah then maybe that's actually a fatal flaw I need a little horniness no I was I was I was happy with it very blessedly only one woman has a speaking role as far as I can recall so It passes the test. Passes the tuki test. The kuki be reverse be doll.
>> Uh, actually fake fan alert in the post script. Scrolls does mention a woman and she does talk to Cole.
>> No. [laughter] >> Other than that, is there's two women.
>> There's two women. Also, we don't know the gender. We actually don't know the gender of the donkey either. I think a donkey is a he.
>> They don't mention his cough.
>> It does say, but I don't remember. Yeah.
>> Okay.
But one thing genre angle you we might structure it a little weird but just my thought going into this we're probably not going to cover beat for beat every battle because you know a lot of times John Fcher likes to it's fun it's fun reading for the most part but you know you can only have so much you know he slashed his sword he dashed here even if it's written well I just probably don't want to like go into that level of grind on it but >> there was slashing and dashing >> yeah to say and some spells were slung >> also Dave is Dave is saving my life because I read this book a year ago and demanded that that we cover it eventually and it [laughter] eventually is now. So >> his day has come due.
>> Yeah.
>> Hope you kept your notes.
>> Listen, that's a nice way of saying that Cap has not read this book. You know, the classic Gerbal things accuse others of what you've done yourself.
>> I will I will I will put you in a headb headlock and power bomb you off of a bridge killing us both. [laughter] >> It's a It's a pretty view. It's pretty all the LMD trans fans will will feel represented by that.
>> Okay. Uh, anything else I guess is high level about it?
>> Well, we we of course had to get onto the cover controversy because the plebs can't understand art.
>> Are you going to start?
>> Yes. So, I actually I as a as a true petrician of the patrician class, I will physically buy despite Blair being a foundational dugger giving us free arc review copies. I actually have the copy in my very hand as we speak. I am multitasking right now. Uh, hence my Libraness. And most people, well, if you watch, there's two uh video reviews of both of them are dog [ __ ] by the way.
There's this one review of uh Island of Esmer where the guy basically recounts vague elements of the plot and mostly about the setting and he's standing in front of his bookshelf. Horrible horrible review. John, >> he did it he did it so spoiler-free in his defense.
>> Yeah, but I I you've learned nothing about the book. Like literally, he he mentions like random like the Green Islander giants like lore about them.
Some of them are twins. Some of them are giants. Some of them are tiny. Yeah, that's the only thing I remember from that [ __ ] review. Dog [ __ ] review.
But this is uh but >> the bizarre phys the the bizarre physomy of the Green Islanders.
>> Now most people uh so the cover probably cover will be boop inserted into here.
[snorts] So it is uh an abstract art that he has done himself. he uh in an interview, not an interview, in a video he did, he did say that he was going to do a uh uh could get a commission, but that fell through. So, he either had to make a piece or reuse a piece of his own as the cover. And uh so the cover, if uh if Dave is feeling lazy and doesn't actually put up the book cover on screen, is a >> Are we are we are we covering We're covering book. We're covering book as object. We're going to judge it by the cover first.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. Okay. Object. Yeah.
>> Yeah. The cover [ __ ] blows. Uh, no.
And the cover is [ __ ] dog [ __ ] >> Uh, Justin is a good visual artist.
>> Uh, this is below him. Not a great graphic designer.
>> He should have He should have just taken his own He should have taken his own work and had someone else handle the the formatting on it because this this didn't work out.
>> Uh, sorry. Sorry. Sorry, dude. It's just not It's not in genre, I think, is the biggest thing, too. This could maybe work on like a on a poetry collection, but it doesn't work for a grim darkish fantasy. It's like it's like you need if any you honestly just go with AI, bro.
>> Well, also also the No, I I disagree. I disagree with that. I think it's literally just I think he literally could have used the same painting that he used. It just needs to be like >> It just needs to be framed in some way.
And also, something was even mean >> something was jacked up with >> political [laughter] >> also you can't um you can't really understand what's going on with the like the text is very muddy and [clears throat] kind of kind of it just doesn't it came out looking extremely self-published which of course is true but you don't want to give people the right idea so >> well you're just you you just want another like slop Franketta 101 copy right you want >> that's not what I'm that's not ask that's not what I'm asking for and I think it would have been a little um a little inaccurate for the for the design, but they're uh for for for the content. I mean, it it just the cover does not work at all and needs to be needs to be reworked. So >> listen, I think it's a kind of an Antoine Artian kind of theater like spectre of cruelty or theater of cruelty thing because if you so to define it to surely define it basically in uh in Artoad's uh kind of definition of the word a theater truly provocative theater is >> I don't know if I'm going to trust anything from a guy whose last name is Artard.
[laughter] >> It's French. It's it's [ __ ] It's it's it's it's delayed.
>> Well, no. Yes. His insights are delayed to the modern world. So, to break it down, basically, it's a communion between actors and audience. You know, gestures, sounds, unusual scenes to form a language superior to words that can be used to subvert thought and logic and to shock the spectator into seeing the baseness of his world.
>> Right? And so, it's beyond language.
which is beyond a mere didacticism of mere conventional portraying a thought to a passive audience. Uh Blair wants all of you not just your passive reception of his work to you. He makes you struggle to understand him. Right?
So this this is a basically he's it's a haunt of the island of Esmer. And if you read the book we we all know about the underside sickness or the downside sickness, >> right? Where where people see visions in the dark and so forth. So, this is obviously representative representative of what it's like to be in a haunt in an abstract form.
>> No, I think it probably just wasn't formatted right.
>> Also, it's it's an it's an ad. Covers are just ads. So, it has to it has to be has to be on on brand. Listen to my fantastic covers of Miles McN on book modern book covers uh to find out more.
But I don't want to [ __ ] on it too much because I think he knows it's not great.
And um but I this is definitely a case of don't judge a book by its cover and hopefully figure some something else out. Even if it's even if it's simple, just go with a Game of Thrones like generic. Throw a [ __ ] like pair of swords crossed underneath or something.
Even that >> you want genre slop and he and he refuses to give it to you.
>> No, no. Just for his own sales, just for his own people picking it up cuz me seeing this on a bookshelf I would assume is a poetry collection or something. Yeah, it's opaque and it also looks spooky like the haunted island and Emer and you just see this. It has a sense element of spookiness to it.
>> Yeah. Well, [clears throat] well, >> I'm judging it as an object and finding it wanting.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. I think I think he's he's got the feedback. I think other people I think they get it. We We could move on to >> Yeah. two rare actually not a rare case where Gabe is right and two of y'all are wrong. Yet again, [laughter] >> um you know what? You know what? We should we should test it. We should re have him republish this with a cover that we choose or each of us gets to choose one. Three alternates come out and >> three alternates come. Yeah, we we'll we'll AB test the cover of the book.
>> Yeah, I'm sure that'll >> I'm sure that'll that'll work, right?
[laughter] >> Except it is indie publishing, so it'll be like two sales versus one specifically.
>> Double the sales.
>> Double the sales.
>> That's right. [laughter] Um, I'll just I'll just buy copies of whichever one I prefer.
[laughter] >> Can't compete with that.
>> He doesn't have $20,000.
>> He doesn't have $100. [laughter] >> I'm too broke bankrolling Charlie x Charlie fan art.
>> I'm busy paying my artist for goon art right now.
>> When's that coming out?
>> Hey, listen. I'm relying on a poll here.
They don't have the Proton work ethic.
All right. Well, I don't want to rush. I don't want to rush art, but back to the aisle. Yeah. I mean, if you guys want, we can just jump right into it kind of just talk through it like kind of a high level because, you know, we're not going to talk about each thing, but you know, characters, rough order, events, all that. Does you guys have anything else like high level?
>> Well, high level I would say again it is very much military fiction is very it's not he says it's based on the song of ice and fire, but I think that's just for Gibbs. Basically, that's him appealing to the pleb the plebs.
Basically, for all intents and purposes, >> it's like it's not very political.
>> That literally doesn't elevator.
>> Yeah.
>> Sadly, >> the thing Yeah. It's completely fine.
It's completely fine to say it's like X plus Y.
>> Mhm. Yeah. [clears throat] No, no, you should say that.
>> Yeah.
>> If you're trying to >> Everyone who's like everyone who's like, "Oh, the anxiety of influence." And it's like, okay, well, you know what? You try to communicate someone something to someone without them having to uh you know read a 400page book before they decide whether or not they want to read a 400page book. Just tell Yeah. You know >> listen y >> So >> listen y'all are internalizing the slob king mindset. Blair is a baker's baron, right? It's all about quality with him.
He even opens up in a actually dare I say it opens up in an epist the more you say it the more like what the [ __ ] [laughter] are you doing for cap didn't even listen to episodes he's >> I don't I don't I don't listen to I don't listen to that [ __ ] [laughter] >> yeah you're out >> the real the real slop kings >> the real slop kings are my co-hosts [laughter] >> basically to to to Brandon Sanderson >> to to to wrap my dream inside a nutshell like that famous Hamlet quote.
Basically, a baker's bear as a craftsman who takes time to build his project, his art, his design. And so, in this format, it opens up with Scrolls, my other literally me character.
>> You're saying he's Japanese.
>> All right. [laughter] >> Yeah. And it opens up in an episttolary format because Scrolls is actually writing down the beginnings like the main hook in an in a Harper town >> and uh he opens up very evocative scrolls. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's it does sound like M Shamalan. Again, he does take words in our language and like like uh and saw off the the file number off of it basically when one word in particular I actually got confirmation from the author himself networking prestige style of where he got the name from. But so he he files off the serial numbers and uh basically like uh it starts off with scrolls the intellectual the aristocrat of the soul actually a literal aristocrat. his father owns land and as as part of the politics back home in the throne land and he's sweating.
He's dripping sweat onto the pile. He's he's critiquing his own style. He should be more objective. He's trying to put his emotions into it. And they're in a port town. Did you discover a scroll where their next haunt is? And it's a great term. It's actually a banger term.
Actually, it's to put a video game reference. I never played it, but I watch all the video essays on it.
Darkest Dungeon. If y'all like Darkest Dungeon, you will like [laughter] >> It was very popular back in the day. It was It was an Indie Darling. It was an Indie Darling. I wanted to play it. I like the art style. If you you like Darkest Dungeon, you'll like Haunted Island on Emer.
[laughter] >> Yeah. Well, it's a Rain of Blood. It's It's very uh uh what's that metal band?
They have Rain of Blood on It was great song. I listened to it as a kid. What was their band? Slayer. Very Slayer entrance to the haunt. And the term the title. Now, the plebs might hate and don't understand the art because they're low IQ and have not read Antony and Artois, but the title is great, the haunt of the island of Esmer. And and a haunt, it's a term basically means to go in the underworld or to go to this version of hell or basically they go to >> on the island of Esmer.
>> Yeah, it's it's literally haunt on the island of Esmer. I'm looking at the book right now. Yeah, haunt haunt on the island of Esmer.
>> Yeah, I'm pretty sure you I thought you said of the island of Esmer.
>> Yeah. Well, it's it's well, it's also in past tense.
>> Can you Dave, can you hear him?
>> He's roboting out.
>> Yeah. Well, I have it back. Can I It's been raining here in the Philippines right now. I'm I'm going full Matt for um basically the hunt of Esmer. So, it the a haunt is them going to these ruins of these past civilizations of these dark cults that reign back in the before times and going down and basically getting as much loot as they can to get out basically because they're basically lost causers. They're trying to fight back against the thrones because there's a leader of the team of the ninth if you will was a division of the military and they were the best of the best like they were like the black ops basically except they're the ninth ops basically and so it's a guy named Cole C O L E but he's nothing but gems. Um and uh basically >> nothing but a gem >> and I forgot exactly the political situation but he felt betrayed by the throne. He led a rebellion. They got their ass kicked and now they spend all their money giving Gibbs to third world terrorists to try to overthrow the Thronelanders and and get back what's rightfully theirs basically. So they're in still in a pseudo open state of rebellion, >> but basically they they're like 70% lost basically. Um they're the war is over basically. They're just coping right now. They're going on haunts as a coping mechanism. So right off the bat, a haunt is just a great term to go on.
>> They're not even burned out because this isn't even their first one.
They've been doing this for a while.
Basically, he doesn't give exact years.
>> Going into a going into a haunt. So, haunts are haunts are kind of a um they are it's not just like a dungeon, right? It's not it's not a a place that is similar to the rest of the phenomenal world. There is it is it is a different kind of um different kind of existence once you enter a haunt. It's basically like you're going to >> some sort of parallel parallel existence. Um sort of, you know, say the veil between worlds is is is thin or something, but there are things that only exist in haunts and things that only can exist in haunts. Um and there is a a sort of spiritual erosion that occurs whenever a person is in uh is in there. And if you are weak willed, you'll basically you'll basically just check out and and die like you just lose your soul.
>> Yeah.
>> Uh just from call it downside sickness >> which is a side >> if you're downside.
>> Yeah. Which is that's right. Which is which is different than say uh you know you can just die by being there versus getting killed by a monster. And there are monsters, right? giant snake will just eat you like with no [laughter] warning.
>> Yes, that's right.
>> So, it's almost like this bounce back to reality can like snap your mind and the prologue opens with like an asylum of these guys being described who are just upside fever >> and and there's a there's a whole like uh there's a whole like this is you have to like sort of titrate your entry and exit as well. So, it's kind of like um you know deep like deep sea diving, right? You get the bends. The nitro the nitrogen percolates out of your blood and and you and you have a stroke except it's your soul.
>> So Cap has unintentionally plagiarized the book he's reviewing himself. Uh because Al Reed actually uses that metaphor of a tribe going pearl diving to get those Jimmy pearls >> uh as a metaphor of what the upside and downside sickness is. So he actually it's actually a metaphor that's actually used directly from the book.
>> Okay. Well, okay. Hey, just read it.
>> Oh, uh, I don't have it. I don't actually don't have it.
>> I thought you said you were going to read it. Okay.
>> No, no, no. No, no. I I I have a book. I have bookmarks in this book, but I ran out of bookmarks and I forgot to buy some at Target. So, uh, that's just purely from my idactic memory.
>> Ran out of edetic, but >> uh, he's just he's triggered by didacticism because of me. He's trying to get a jab in.
>> Oh, is he?
>> Yeah. Yeah. Your your pro your provincialism is showing, David.
[laughter] Um, >> oh, you don't like to be taught or or don't you dress don't you trust experts?
Are you some kind of anti-intellectual, David?
>> Yeah.
Uh, I What was I saying? I I was say also, Gabe, is there any way you get closer to your router or something? Just because we've had a couple like dropouts from you.
>> I have I can cut this part.
>> Yeah. Hold on one second. I have a one [laughter] go on your >> Yeah. Like I wouldn't say anything. Like at first it wasn't that bad, but like you've >> just we've just like lost you for like 30 seconds a few times. At least I have.
>> Hold on. Go go go in your spiel. I have a internet connection.
>> Yeah. Just just go in your spiel and I I'll be right back in less than five minutes. It's in literally the next room. So hold on one second. It's literally getting worse. It's gotten worse after you asked.
>> I know.
>> Listen, just just pop off. Don't look at it. Don't look [laughter] at it.
>> Listen. Pop off David. Go.
>> Yeah. Yeah. Go mess with it. Yeah. We'll just Yeah.
Uh anyway. Anyway, and um what were you talking about? Oh, yeah. The haunt.
Yeah. And there's this implication, that's what I was saying. There's this implication that it's uh these are the ruins of like a past corrupted civilization. And in some way, it's even haunting, no pun intended, their modern civilization because they're capital of the Thronelands. There's a rumor that it's uh built on a on the remnant of one of these haunts. And there's all these um there's there's a lot of there's a lot that's not said explicitly, but it's fun to read in and that's kind of the horror of it is uh it's you know good horror because it's not perfectly clear what's happening. Like you said, Cap, there's like this dimensional element.
There's this like horror element.
>> It's like a ruin. It's like a ruin that's not just the physical ruin, but also a spiritual ruin.
>> Yeah.
>> Right. It it exists. It's a it's a it's a wound on reality. M >> um rather than rather than just like a sort of collapsed building, right?
>> You know what it reminds me of is a little bit of Stalker where they're pulling out these artifacts and it's like dangerous people doing it, but also the horrors they end up pulling out like effectively one of the things, you know, spoiler for the book, but one of the things they take out is essentially a nuclear bomb they [laughter] take back to reality and it's like damn, dude.
Like it's like this is going to have real implications and this is not the only one. And so it's it's and it's legal, isn't I'm messing this up. I think it's legal for the in the throne lands to to loot them, but they have to it's like controlled, but it is done. So it's like it's there's this active corruption.
>> They're a source of Yeah, they're a source they're they're a source of wealth, right? So it is an exploited resource, >> right? But you have to be you have to be permitted and stuff. You're basically poaching. You're basically poaching this sort of source of wealth if the if you don't have the correct, you know, remit to do to raid haunts.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. You had to have Jany approval basically >> before the before they were, you know, before they were sort of outcast. They were, you know, they were uh they raided haunts for for the crown. So that was the >> uh like that's where their expertise came from and they were they were the best at uh retrieving these these sorts of thing these uh sorts of items and and the types of things that come out of the haunts aren't just like you know crazy weapons. Sometimes they're just like >> uh gold.
>> Well, some Yeah. Well, sure. Sometimes it's like money, but also it's like this is just a a useful object, right, for daily life kind of [ __ ] right? Like a um like a a fishbon knife that never gets dull or whatever.
>> You know what I'm saying? It's like it's really good at filleting fish, [laughter] >> you know?
>> Or orbs that maximize mages powers basically. Like you could you could power six you could power six battle mages with this orb. That kind of thing.
>> Right. Right. Right. Just a battery.
[laughter] >> Oh, we should talk magic too. Like just magic in general in the setting because we have um uh the mage. Is it mage or wizard? Yeah, just mage.
>> Mage. Just mage. M.
>> Yeah. And and you know the what is like his bo his fingers are weirdly long. Not like anyone know this podcast. He has weirdly long fingers, disfigured body, and he wears like the the bronze mask which comes up again later in the haunt itself. But it's just like depicted as it's like a torturous selfimilating experience. It's a contact magic at all.
Um >> yeah, >> like a dark bar. Very classic grim dark fantasy.
>> Yeah. I love the way he describes it because you when first time he uses magic, his knuckles lally like rearrange themselves underneath his skin. You could hear it cracking.
>> Like they're clearly moving in the inhuman way. Yeah.
>> Like it corrupts you. It corrupts you.
There's there's a physical and a a spiritual cost to it. I I one of the things that I like I like I like uh when magic systems are not hard magic systems. I like it when they're sort of ruled by implication and the limits on them are not >> sort of mathematically hammered out but more of a like sort of an an insidious and continuous uh cost which is what sets it which is what sets you know sort of the magic users apart from the from the normal people.
>> Yeah. Very programmed to killes kind of thing. They're they basically torture these boys. Well, it's like it's, you know, it's sort of like um I I mean R.
Scott Baker's uh >> Darkness that comes before >> Dark Darkness of Nothing.
>> Yeah. Prince of Nothing series.
>> Uh you know, the there's a there's a spiritual cost to the use of magic. Um, and even you know there's I don't want to give any credit to Robert Jordan but basically uh but basically like if a man uses magic it makes him go insane but women are are spiritually different from men and so can contact magic safely.
So, um, or you know, it's this is it's also common in things like, uh, I don't know, I was I was kind of thinking of Vampire Hunter D. If you ever if you ever watched that, um, >> that classic classic anime movie, >> uh, there is a there is a mage in that called Grove who essentially has to do heroin uh, to to use magic [laughter] and eventually like literally just just dies of an overdose.
>> Yeah. Well, well, all mage has to do is just take a smoke of red leaf, his bro, afterwards.
>> Well, but then he also but then he also is like he's also like beset by voices and has to come down whenever he uses magic.
>> Mhm.
>> Right. So, Mage is clearly like an endstage magic user.
>> Yeah, he's already cuz because his powers are kind of low level at first, but they explain like, oh, listen back in you have seen him back in the day before his knees gave out, so they can't twist underneath the skin properly. But also they're like trying to manage him as a resource too. Like that's a big part early on is like what is it? Um all red like actually like trips up and lures in some of the little demon guys and and he [clears throat] has to get help from the wizard. He's like [ __ ] He's like we weren't supposed to be expending him now.
>> Yeah. [ __ ] We needed him for later.
Yeah.
>> Yeah. It's like down 10% power. It's not literal like that. I I'm like you. like the softness and the baker comparison actually is super interesting because it does there is a there is a little bakerism where like in Baker you the implic or at least the comic exception I haven't read the later books but is that if you if you touch magic you're doomed to hell >> yeah you're literally damned yeah >> yeah and this pretty similar to this there's no afterlife there's not the afterlife thing but it's like if you're if you're making contact with these things you're you're going to be a broken person >> yeah that's Right. Yeah. If not mentally and physically in the case of Mage. And also, as a sidebar, we got we got to have an intervention with you, Captain.
>> Hey, that's the name of Hey, that's the name of this show.
>> Yeah, we're we're finally tying into our god- aful naming convention.
>> Thank you, Miles Mcnotton, for that.
>> Did a Jordan Chad like cuck you in high school? What is your burning hatred of Robert B. Jordan?
>> Uh, no. Is I don't think that B is I think you're thinking of Michael B.
Jordan, the actor. Uh, Robert Robert Jordan isn't even Robert Jordan's real name. It was a pen name. Uh, but um, yeah. So, I I I had multiple people insist to me that the Wheel of Time series was good. Um, and I was foolish enough to believe my friends. And so I uh read all of it.
All of it. All 15 books. I read all 15 books and uh 15 I think it's 15 15 14 or 15 >> 14 or 15. Yeah, >> I read all of them including the Brando Sando ones. Um and it never got good. It was bad >> even when Sanderson took over. I I hear it got it was trash. It was trash. It was bad the whole way through. The first book is probably the best one and it's like if you if if you want to read the first what the uh eye of the hunt >> eye of the world >> eye of the world. Yeah. Yeah.
>> Um if you if you like if you want to read that actually what you should just do is read the Fellowship of the Ring because it's it's the Fellowship of the Ring beat for beat with like >> with a little romance dashed in.
>> Yeah. with like a little bit of romance, but like also like too many descriptions of tight silk dresses and >> Oh, and it gets worse, baby.
>> So, it gets worse. It gets so much worse. Anyway, no, Robert Robert Jordan.
No one should ever read The Wheel of Time.
>> Yeah, but it's the man that read like unironically cap, it must be like 5,000 pages of of just total garbage. Like in terms I'm I'm the back half like because the first I think the first like one the one I think >> the character who is literally just Aragorn.
>> Yes.
>> Like there's a character named Lem lem lamb.
>> Lamb or lamb.
>> Lamb. Something like that. Yeah. An L name. Short L name. Anyway, he is the the lost k he's he's the a wandering warrior who is the lost king of a civilization who takes >> which borders >> who takes a trio of rural bumpkins.
Yeah. Yeah. Which b which borders the the evil evil area. Yeah. Uh, and he's trying to return and claim it like some sort of king who returns. Like [laughter] I It's It's so bad. [ __ ] Robert Jordan.
>> I have to give some push.
>> Robert Jordan.
>> No. No. Listen.
>> He died too late to save the world from this dog [ __ ] [ __ ] series.
>> Well, until Sanders Listen, Sanderson swears by the books. Okay. The the king of fantasy himself.
>> And there's really no argument against that. I had to I had to push back because I read the first chapter of the first book and I really liked it.
[laughter] >> Did you watch a YouTube like retrospective on it too?
>> So you have like I'm not accepting I'm not accepting this attempt to trigger me, you [ __ ] >> Ironically, I would reread the first book if you wanted to to like talk through it. I know you probably refused to, Cap, but >> I'm not [ __ ] ever reading that [ __ ] again. [laughter] Oh, but but it was so cool cuz it's about a reincarnated wizard guy and he ends up falling through sinful history.
>> I'm going to spoil you.
>> It was cool. I like the first chapter. I just never read the rest. But I really like >> You should read it.
>> Well, we'll talk about it sometime.
It's all downhill. It's 15 books of downhill from there.
>> Yeah, it really is. It's a cursed pill.
>> But you know what isn't a cursed pill?
What? You know what's haunt pill is this book because it just just gets better from the first page.
>> There might be sequels.
>> There should there should be sequels.
There should be sequels. I mean people should buy it so that Justin has a incentive to write sequels >> but um >> and people should subscribe so we have an incentive to review them.
>> That's that's right. Yeah. Um yeah. Any anyway I'm not sure how we got on to that.
>> Oh it was it was the magic talk. I think we just saw magic systems for a minute.
But um I mean what else?
>> Back to the haunting. Also I also to get ling to get linguist nerd venstein style.
>> Oh shout out sorry to interrupt but shout out to Justin. He has a if you do want to check his stuff out his YouTube he has a fantastic linguistics video on the wizard knight and um I really recommend checking that one out because he's very bright guy on that stuff.
Sorry. He's very knowledgeable also like with random things like he knows what like baby horses are named and he knows about like oh every time we talk >> yeah that too and like uh >> every [laughter] and every every time we talk about vegetables or like fruit he knows so much about fruit lore it's insane he's like like a god tier gardener in terms of knowledge he's always in the comment section if we bring up something like vegetable or like organic related right so nemitsesque in terms of his knowledge breath of knowledge and also I have to bring up which of the main cast The ninth is your literally me character because mine is obviously first is actually mage. Mage is literally me and also scrolls. Those are my two literally me.
>> I think I would I would love to see you break your break your every knuckle in your hands [laughter] one day. I would love to see that.
>> Every time Cap is in trouble. Imagine every time you just Gabe Gab [laughter] has to break his hands.
>> Yeah.
Well, the main training is much like being homeschooled. We're we're loners.
We're better being homeschooled.
>> Scrolls has big homeschooled energy to be honest. Like I I would agree with that.
>> Even though he literally went to college.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. Exactly. He's a poser. He's a fake cell. He's a fake cell mage. He's better than everyone else. Everyone has to implicitly acknow everyone's scared of him, but they're scared of him because of his implicit superiority. And they they resent the fact that he's objectively superior to everyone else.
Yeah. So like Mage and Scroll are mine.
So they're doing a a main cast roll call. Which one of you of the main cast are y'all's literally me characters?
>> Dave, honestly, it's not flattering. I think at least I think Lookout. I think I'm a Lookout. I'm a [ __ ] Maxer, I love the Lookout. Everything Lookout.
Honestly, I was like half the book should be Lookout.
>> Him and Bof and the interplay with them and the main the main crew was just like it sang for me.
>> I think it's Lookout's like 30 or 40%.
>> I I'd say because Lookout doesn't get introduced until a little like a quarter through the book.
>> C, how about you?
I'm going with uh I'm gonna go with Cole because uh I I'm the who has to deal with all of you [ __ ] [laughter] >> I I'm surprised that No, you don't like Stone Burner. Stone Burner is very cozy.
I like Stone Burner.
>> Stoneer.
>> He seems good.
>> I don't dislike any of them >> to be honest. Like yeah, I the cast is very strong. Um just in general, the cast is quite strong. Um I I I Yeah, I I I want I want I want I want to read more stories to see to see all of these uh this whole cast interact.
>> Well, the objectively worse character is the Jos Sweden knockoff Reddit uh doctor character who's like just is tattooed, wears an orange like headband and laughs all the time and giggles. The only thing interesting is >> Well, because he's because he's on No, he's he's not What do you mean he's just sweet? He's he's on drugs all the time >> and he's like >> that's >> that's his character trait. That's all his character trait is. I'm high on drugs all the time and I giggle a lot.
That's it.
>> Is is on drugs is on drugs, produces drugs, is the only guy who is good enough at making drugs to make drugs that help with the downside sickness, right?
>> Yeah. And they they mentioned that the fact that everyone in the ninth deals with the downside sickness their own way. Al Reed has his smokes and his religion. The the mother goddess, I forget the name of the of the female goddess worship.
>> All right. Yeah. Um and the twins they do via dice games and their brotherly bond. Squirrels intellectualizes it and writes it down in his like little notebooks. Cole just raw dogs the sickness. Cole >> raw. Yes. What do What do you do? You know, what do you do with the pain? Just endure it. [laughter] >> Pretty much.
>> Pretty much Cole just raw dogs it. Mage just basically just talks to his demons literally actually.
>> And of course a Reddit man just tattoos himself and gets high on drugs.
>> I mean, is it like is it like a modern you is this a metaphor? Is this is this a is this modernity?
>> Oh my god.
>> You ready? You know, aren't we all a little bit of a Reddit man?
>> Aren't we all just a little bit of a Reddit man? [laughter] >> Yeah. Cab goes haunting every time he goes to Library of Mass Destruction.
every time. [laughter] >> It's just like I mean honest honestly the the every every time I do an episode of LMD I slowly I slowly erode and use the spirits of my of my co-hosts to get through another just to get through another episode. You know it it it extracts a toll on them and that is a price I am willing to pay and that's why I'm full.
>> True. That's true. Also I Stone Burner also deals with singing because they he sings like romantic ballads about the ninth. He's a Stone Burner is actually a great singer. He gives them their morning slop. Uh he he doesn't go into detail how good the food is. I think Stone Burner's a good cook.
>> He doesn't go in the haunt though. He doesn't go in the hunt.
>> No, he's purely logistics. He's a support he's support.
>> He's the quarter master. Yeah.
>> And also there's there's a ship guy. His name is Gillum or something like that.
He he >> Oh, yeah. The pir the pirate captain who stays off ship who does who doesn't who doesn't like [ __ ] with any of that land [ __ ] I loved all the sailors they [ __ ] with. What was it like? Throws the gold coins in front of the door.
[laughter] Like, oh guys, a bounty.
Like, it's so dirty. They're so They're such [ __ ] to everyone that's not like right in their click. And they almost they almost murder um Lookout, too. Remember when they get introduced, they have like the the do we need to kill him? Uh >> nah.
>> Yeah. [laughter] Yeah, that was a good part, but it was also kind of a bad part because Blair kind of falls into violence scars you because look out like uh you know he is a romanticist. He wants to be a knight.
He fancies being a knight. He reads stories from bof his little ethnic psych.
>> But that's also but that's also probably the most that's probably the most like Jartton Martin. That's probably the most martinesesque uh aspect of the story.
>> True. That that is true. it, you know, it's like war is le bad and not glorious and he doesn't get excited when seeing it. He actually pisses he look at literally pisses himself. He urinates on himself. He pissplays upon himself upon seeing it.
>> I mean that that gave me a mark it down.
My first markdown upon this book, this glorious book is the sentence. It's literally one of the first be it's within like 50 or 80 or 120 pages. uh the sentence boiled leather armor and my and my heat trained brain just shriveled in agony when I when I read that cuz as you know all the scholars shadows skull grim uh medatron all >> I like how you say he trained brain but what you mean is like chronic traumatic encphilitis [clears throat] [laughter] encphylopathy.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. as a as a as a scholar of every uh historian of of the European era.
>> Adversity has adversity right in the name. I mean, you're learning real stuff there.
>> Yeah, he literally has a gambisonin. He does sword fights and training and everything. Leather armor is not useful.
They would be wearing gambisonins.
Gambisonins is far superior to basic [ __ ] boil leather armor.
Leather armor was basically never used historically.
Uh, yeah. I mean, I think that that's a great argument except leather armor obviously looks [ __ ] sick.
>> So, whereas like wearing a quilted smock looks gay as [ __ ] >> Yeah.
>> So, we're not doing that.
>> You know who's the worst? The Incans.
You're never going to see a movie about like Incan warriors fighting cuz the armor looks so [ __ ] silly. It's like these thick cotton or not even cotton, it's like these thick like llama wool like blankets like five layers and they dress up as furries.
>> Yeah, the furry for the furry divisions.
>> Yeah. Also also like >> those Aztec, but yeah, them too.
>> Also something that you don't know, Gabe. Uh and something that your [ __ ] uh YouTube scholars don't know is that quilted fabric armor uh gives you no protection in haunts. Uh whereas when you go into a haunt, leather armor actually gives you like plus seven because uh it's made of it's made of meat technically and it gives you uh it gives you more uh more strength to resist to resist the downside sickness.
>> So I bet you I bet you didn't [ __ ] think of that, huh? I bet you put that in your [ __ ] pipe and smoke it.
>> My my red Yes.
>> In your red leaf pipe. Put that in your pipe.
>> But here's the thing. That doesn't justify Helga or all the other people wearing leather armor that don't specialize in haunting cuz she wears leather armor.
>> No, they're larers. No, no, no, dude.
They're larers. They're larers.
>> They want They want to look They want to look like real haunt raiders, right?
That's why she also has a [ __ ] squad of midgets, right? Who who who brings a squad of midgets to an actual battle?
Someone who's in it for the vibes.
>> I got I got a quiz, Gabe. What what should they have worn?
>> Well, obviously other well listen for for that justification the leather armor thing works as a justification for haunting because the flesh angle there's at least a good lore justification for that and also booting material leather armor does look >> I did just make that up. I did just make that up though. That's not in the in the book.
>> It makes it has a logic to it though.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. I I was I was already trying to remember it cuz they do they fight these dragons like and I listen he's not like he's not lore dumping but he's very good with the lore cuz all mages wear these bronze mask like when he eats like he puts his hood up to hide his hideous face and puts down the bronze mask when he eats and he puts it back on and some of the demons they find on the haunt are previous mages from the before times >> and the monsters literally still have they they still have the bronze mask like melted into their skin. That was a great like understanding which is pretty sick. Yeah, it's pretty cool. Yeah, >> it's a great little lore touch. It's a And also to get linguistic, do you think the haunting like the going on a haunt if I were to say to you Ver's universe, I'm going on a haunt versus I'm going haunting. I think haunting sounds a little bit better grammatically versus just going on a haunt or going haunting.
Is that what you're asking?
>> Haunting. Yeah, haunting. I think haunting it's like haunting, right?
Haunting. I It sounds more organic to say haunting rather than just going on a haunt. I think he should have used the phrase haunttology at some point.
>> The haunttology of the island of Esmer.
No, that's a scroll. That's a scroll.
>> Scrolls. Yeah. Yeah. Scrolls should have mentioned haunttology at some point.
>> Yeah. Uh that's is a that's that's a little gay pick right there. I think haunting as an adjective. Haunting sounds better.
>> But you're you're verbing a noun which is kind of like informal sounding. I I think I personally I think it's I I think it's better as is.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. The haunt itself is a great >> haunt itself is a great term. I I still I think that was a it's a gem title overall.
>> So overall >> it's also very it's also for some reason extremely hard to remember the title to this point.
>> Yeah. The on the or in the I I alter >> also you want to say also because because it's genre you want to say isle instead of island.
>> Oh yeah.
>> Oh true.
>> You totally do. Yeah.
>> Yeah. I his he doesn't try to lar with he doesn't go costume jewelry as auntie Ursula said like they say okay I think they do say okay they say kid it's technically is yes kid was used for goats back in the medieval times so technically it counts but kid sounds yeah kid still sounds like modernesque to it I I don't think they say okay I can't I'll retract that but they don't use like he doesn't use like period appropriate linguistics excuse me but uses just enough he uses just Well, but the thing is that this occurs in But the thing is of of course this book occurs 10 years from now in Haiti.
>> True. It's Yes, it's archism. Exactly.
>> So, so check checkmate [laughter] atheist.
>> Oh god. But so anyway, so they find this scroll from a hermit. This this they have a guy hobaxing and this guy just shoves uh the scroll. I think it's all reed and scrolls. I think all red name is all red. All All Reed sounds better.
So, I honestly don't know how it's pronounced, but we're assuming you're opposing.
>> You think they're just pronouncing it Reed Leaf?
>> No. What? Listen, he's not named after leaf.
>> Okay. All right.
>> He's not named after the smoke. He's not named after Just because he smoked, he's not named after a cigarette.
>> Yeah.
>> It's both, though. It's both.
>> Anyway, all Reed gets the um It's a literary podcast. It's a pun.
>> It clearly went over your head.
>> I'm gonna harm you. [laughter] >> You're going to haunt me. Anyway, >> I'm gonna go on a Hertology. I'm going to go on a hurt [laughter] of you.
>> So anyway, all Reed receives the scroll and they go back to base and scrolls tries to look it up in Wikipedia and he can't find Esmer anywhere. It's a very vague place.
>> It's a very prequel scene. Yeah.
>> Yeah. It's it's it's it's Lucas. That's what makes it brilliant. So he he he looks all over to find any reference of uh of Esmer. He finds barely any notes.
It's like it's an island all the way down south. The throne land technically has it but just use it they just use it to drop all their unks to just but just drop the boomers there for the retirement plans like Florida.
>> So like a hand a handful of like militarys technically inhabit it but it's like like a dozen at most UNKs who inhabit a place. And so they eventually make their way to Esmer. And the thing is I I wanted to talk about this. This is merely This is merely a 12k island.
[laughter] >> Yeah, I don't know. 12 unks. And >> island of 12s.
>> And and an elder in the throne culture is called an otman. An a t m- an otman.
Now, as a historian myself, I actually instantly clock this as a reference to the Kha'Zek culture and the Ottoman uh the the big dog in Ka'ix culture or the main chief, the big papa, papa, so forth. Papa Kazak. Uh they call them Ottomans. A tt a m- an Hman reference.
>> No, I as listen using my credentials and my networks, I managed to contact Blair himself and I said, "Oh, yeah, this is a reference to Kha'Zix." He confirmed it by the way. So it's an insider scoop.
>> I was concerned that it was a that it was a reference to the uh Sanskritic word atman uh which means uh soul which is you know why like Gandhi's title is Mahatma like great soul >> but yeah interesting.
>> Well this book does contain souls.
>> I was concerned I was concerned but it makes it makes sense that in Haiti they wouldn't know that word. So, [laughter] >> these are the last boomers who vacation on >> Haiti.
Haiti does not have an H-1B program. So, >> I literally had someone try to talk me into taking a vacation in Haiti once, like right after the earthquake, too.
That that really bad one. And he was like, "Yeah, we went. It was like such a It was such a deal to go." [laughter] And I was like, >> "You you could you could pay me to go to Haiti, but you wouldn't have to pay me."
>> Yeah.
>> Oh. Oh, speaking of dude, we could do Cookies Mag Live on Haiti.
>> Yeah, >> Cookies Mag Live. We're going on a We're going on a Haiti.
>> We [laughter] dude, we for for MR episode two, we can get General Barbecue on for for authenticity. [laughter] Do the M >> episode title taking a hiatus. A hiatus.
>> Hey. Yeah.
>> Oh, and my and my accent can finally be lore appropriate, actually. It's actually brilliant, actually. It's a It's a [laughter] >> Yeah. He He'll just He'll just think you you don't have an accent.
>> Exactly. [laughter] It'll be immersive.
>> I wonder I wonder how Barbecue is doing.
>> He still runs things there. I think >> they shot at a Spirit Airlines flight recently.
>> Really?
>> Not recently. Like last two months.
>> Not anymore. Not anymore.
>> Yeah. See, not enough Haitians on the plane.
>> No. No more Spirit Airlines. Yeah. No more Spirit Airlines. last year.
>> Wouldn't want to have any uh wouldn't want to have any uh >> booked flights for Frontier right now, though. [laughter] >> That's That's where they're all going.
It's going to be the >> the great migration from Spirit to Frontier. [laughter] >> Listen, as every top tucker should know, United is clearly uh the Patrician's choice of flight. Thank you very much, >> J. Sorry. [snorts] >> But you know what is United is the ninth because they remember the ninth. There's a slogan they have which is remember the ninth. Remember the ninth. And there's like literally so the the remnants of the actual real deal Holyfield 9th are Cole his second command Allreed who is a vegetarian who's of uh who is a cousins of Helga who appears later. She's the goon bait in the leather armor. So Allreed his second command stone burner the cook/maintenance guy. Reddit Dr. Man who's like all a ll something. His name starts with an A. I can't quite remember. Mage literally me. Scrolls also literally me. Uh, who else? It's six. Was it? What is there? Any other?
Oh, yeah. The the uh the twins.
>> They pull in too.
>> The the giants. The the twins. So, seven and eight >> and Gillum the ship captain. So, not actually. Yeah, literally there's nine members left of the ninth >> at this point. During their first rebellion, they just took a massive L.
And that's literally the remnants of the ninth and all Reed when he's smoking his red leaves. And also, they have cigarettes in this universe. And not only do they have cigarettes, they have lighters. They literally carry coal.
They have like uh >> Yeah, the little fire boxes. Yep.
>> Yeah. They have coal braces that allow you to smoke. And it's it's like also to get another It's like X and Y, you know, in Providence is like Fallout meets Lewis and Clark. Um um there is a Witcheresque thing where all Reed in order to get like amped up for fights, he has an he has like a little spiked or like a pot brownie red leaves that he only lets himself smoke during battle.
Yeah, he's got he's got his spe he's got his special PCP dipped cigarettes [laughter] enhances his senses during the fight and he only feels at home during the fights cuz uh because during the fight he doesn't have to think and he doesn't have to reminisce. That's a very is kind of the main character of this book in many ways. He has no he has no no reason to go.
>> It's multi-POV. I think we've mentioned that already, but it's it's the classic fantasy where the the chapter titles, the character name, and you just you jump right in. It alternates pretty.
>> That is actually a Martin thing.
>> Yeah. Specifically a Martin thing. Yeah, >> that was the he doesn't use it to its most potential, I think, cuz the two best characters are, of course, Lookout and All Reed, and we don't we get very little Scrolls Tent. Scrolls is the is the episttolary uh construction of it.
He does the episttolary beginning and the episttolary end. Um, other than that, we don't get much.
>> It's funny you say that. I was going to say the opposite. I was like, I wish he just focused on those two even more to the exclusion of others because I don't know. I I I just felt like I I I like them so much. I kind of wanted just to stay in their view. Um, but but I I get what you mean like you like who would you want to hear from? Just scrolls.
>> Yeah. Scrolls. get more background lore because we get lore from about the war from Helga.
>> Warlord >> and >> warlord. We get warlore from from a little bit from Helga because so um we'll get >> more warlord from the [ __ ] [laughter] >> Yes. Or from from from the literary ch I I I I like this universe a lot. And and and Scrolls knows a lot. And the thing is we don't get he he sprinkles I was hungry cuz scrolls does explain what haunts are a little bit to both the kid and Helga but nowhere near deep enough.
I wanted the full Wikipedia page of like the history of hauntings, right? And he and Bear and Blair in his in his Baker Baron way denies me of my lore slob uh which agitates me. So [snorts] so most of the perspective is from all read and so they eventually make their way to the island. They and it's it's the thing is in a very realistic way.
Half of it is about camping, searching out the land, scouting. They find a handful like three or four. Uh he doesn't call them demons, he calls them doms, I think. DHL lams.
Yeah, I read its means dams. I I don't know.
>> Yeah, they're doms. And uh they fight a handful of doms. But the thing is they also he he loves prep work because he has the mage have them in a faint at all times just makes them invisible. And he he strategizes. Okay. Okay. Um the twins go here. You're the support for mage.
Mage is only used at the last minute. Uh all goes out swinging. Like he's very tactical. He gets into tactical porn a lot. And it's it adds to the gritty realistic feel to it, you know, other than his leather slot boiled armor. and um and and goes into camping and and Stone Breaker brings out the food and the logistic porn is great if you're into it. It's very good. And uh I wanted to talk about pacing with y'all cuz we don't get to the haunting gate until well over 200 pages. I think it's well uh it's uh well 300 page 300 already in the haunt. It's a 417 page book. I'd say 400. Oh, sorry, 419 page book. And I think it's well into page 200 something where we finally get the epic writing blood opening of the haunt. So, what what's your thoughts of that pacing? Did does he does he blue ball you just enough to get you eager for the haunt and when you finally was he was the haunt worth it? And do you think uh he slow burned just enough or did he overcook this chunk of coal? Was he over slow burn? Um, I I I liked I I liked at the chapter level, the pacing, but I did have a minor complaint that I felt like the nitty-gritty logistics, as you phrased it, was a little too nitty-gritty for me. And I did find myself skimming a little bit at certain points. It was the camp. It would cover what every single guy was doing at the camp. It felt like like very regularly >> instead of just letting me sink into >> just all read or all read or all however you're saying it now. um just sinking into him or look at like it felt a little bit too especially in the early first couple chapters it was like very much making sure you know everyone's there what they're doing and like I feel like that bogged it down cuz that went on for a little while but at the chapter level I thought it was I thought it was well paced and I thought it was good I thought it was good not to be like the whole thing is is in the haunt because that you want to have this good buildup for it then the haunt can be like a tighter experience relative so that that was my feeling it >> cap how about you I disagree. I love the logistics porn, by the way. That was one aspect I really liked.
>> I do kind of like the I do kind of like the logistics. Um, just because I think that I mean in a in a sense the characters are also like pretty heavily identified with whatever their roles are. Mhm.
>> Um, you get the sense that there's been this like winnowing and so you get to >> by hearing what they're doing, you're sort of seeing how seeing how their actions have sort of formed this group.
>> Yeah.
>> They're filling the cracks of the men who have fallen.
>> Yep. That's right. Yeah.
>> Yeah. And and and the thing is they're slowly becoming less human. They're dehumanizing themselves. They only have their routine. The routine is key.
>> Yeah. They have their role is really Yeah.
>> Yeah. Like if you were to take out like the description markers and a character says, "Oh, I I hear the dice rolling."
Oh, that's obviously the twins because that's their thing. Their coping mech was to to play dice. And no one knows the rules of the dice game. [laughter] The only Islanders just randomly slap each other and laugh while they play the dice game.
>> Yeah. And one one thing, you know, on that point, um the characters do all speak with very distinct voices. I think that Blair's character work is exceptional. Like >> you don't get um >> you you don't you don't get confused.
The characters do not feel um interchangeable >> um at all.
>> Yeah. Yeah. His characterization is extremely strong >> and uh and uh it's and honestly just very cozy. The island is very cozy. When we finally get introduced to Lookout, uh when is the first Lookout chapter? I want to say it's well over chapter four I think it's like yeah >> page 59 I think page yeah I'm looking at it right now I think it's pageif it's we get the first 50 pages all to the ninth and then lookout cucks all read on chapter 4 and lookout so he is a son of a throneer boomer of course the the boomers get free cheap land in Florida basically um and uh >> well free u was it malariainfested island island island island territory >> hey they get their they get their nut wine I think it's called nut wine right, which is like their version of alcohol, you know. So, Lookout is a boy and he he he loves his culture. He can't read. He only knows some of the legends because his his ethnic best friend uh uh tells him stories of Thorland lore. And so, he gets his first job as a lookout. So, they find this little tower and the tower is right on the border between literally demons and the general tribes.
The only thing keeping them alive is that there's implanted runes or planted like wards underneath the earth that he had to dig out. So literally the fences Chesterton's fence is the only thing keeping these tribes and from getting raped by demons basically.
>> Mhm. Yeah. Yeah.
>> So he's and he spends his >> So he basically uh ends spends most of his gate getting drunk on nut wine and making Warhammer minifigures out of wood and and all Reed actually says he's a very good craftsman actually with the figures and um basically just gooning to to these fantasies that he buff who is a pseudo mage or a shaman. He's touched by the magic from a young age.
>> He's like a scholar when they first meet him. like he he he learned to read just out of sort of a passion for learning um from the the admin and but then it becomes apparent quickly once he >> the three standard deviations above the rest of the islanders this guy.
>> Yeah. It's a bunch of [ __ ] knuckle draggers on the island.
>> Yeah. The the one bead people. And what's strange about them is they literally put beads under their skin.
>> So he's so the kid is he's he's a level one so he only has one bead underneath his skin. And uh and they uh also have a donkey. He brings a donkey up to the lookout to give him supplies and his nut wine. And they throw donkey literally when the knight comes and sees them.
They're literally throwing donkey [ __ ] at each other cuz they went on a bender the previous night. And the railing of the of the lookout house is literally like destroyed cuz he fell drunk.
[laughter] >> Yeah. He drunkenly fell off. Yeah. But also, you just read his chapter, which I loved, where he he describes their their like battles as these like tense tiffs and whatever. And there's like you literally you stumble across them as adult POV and they're flinging donkey [ __ ] at each other.
So good.
>> Ary literally sneaks up while invisible and gets onto the lookout. He's like, "Huh, the railing is broken." And he gets his c he he debates shooting the [ __ ] And for the first like good couple times the like scrolls even is going to stab the kid before like oh no no no the boys are okay and of course um the leftover managerialism of the throne land. So they talk to lookout and lookout's like um do you have papers?
Are you real thorand landers? And and he has scroll [ __ ] a couple things and and of course lookout holds it. The first time he's ever hold paper and he's like oh my god this is real paper.
There's like ink and [ __ ] on here like this is real writing. Of course, he doesn't know how to read and he holds like a holy item like, "Oh my god, this is like he's like a weeb for his own culture." Basically, he's like, "Oh my god, buff, please read this. You're the only one who can actually read this."
So, all Reed feeds him like, "Oh yeah, we're from the throne land. We're adventurers, dude. We're licensed adventurers and you can be a knight and everything. You can." He doesn't offer to join them and lookout wants to join them. He's like, "You could be under our servers and under our our authority."
And of course, Ary bullshits him flawlessly and epically. And while B in his usual superstitious native ways dares to just trust this white man, but also all Reed is also vegan. I forgot to mention that. I I >> that was never explained. Was it like it's just more part of his culture?
>> Yeah, it's part of his heritage. I think it's their culture. They don't eat meat.
They just roll it all vegans. They're like they're like uh they drink a lot of milk though. That's that's how >> I thought I thought it had something I thought it had something to do with what had happened to him because Helga did eat meat. Well, yeah, but she's uh but she's been spending too much time in the east because in a universe >> I'm pretty I'm pretty sure it had to do with his >> I'm pretty sure it had >> No. Yeah. Yeah.
>> Oh, because he talks because he sees it people as a kid, too. Like he like goes on a raid really I Yeah. I don't know.
It's a weird weird detail.
>> Yeah. Yeah. I don't think he doesn't like meat. I >> think he's not a meat guy.
>> He talks about all the gore.
>> He opened up a bunch of people and found out it was all meat.
>> Yeah. like he talks about when they're cutting up the demons when when scrolls is going all lore Nord reading and examining the organs of the demons they kill >> and um and demons is an alternate pronunciation. I've seen scrolls mentions that some cultures do call them demons. So we're not being lore inaccurate by calling them demons even though they're technically like clinically they're called doms uh you know dummy mommy demons.
>> Doy momummies.
>> Yeah. Literally mummies.
Imagine if Mage was a girl. Mage would be hot as a girl. I think >> they are disgusting.
>> Dude, imagine all the bone things you could do with her pelvis.
>> Come on, think about it.
>> Sounds like something our friend Jack PC would write.
>> Yeah, [laughter] >> dude. It It would It would be kinky. It would be hot. Mage should have been the [ __ ] bait, not Helga. [laughter] >> Apparently for one of us he was.
[laughter] >> Anyway, other than a badass mage. And so they start setting up camp at the they teach him how to properly light a fire and they go full logistics porn and all Reed has to go back to the ship and this is where you get our first real deal like combat encounter like instead of just a handful like he get he finds a pack of demons and he has to jump over a cliff and he he sends a silent prayer to his god the the mother god and uh he's like hey it's my last smoke might as well I might as well die fighting right but he does send up a flare uh to for the mage he does decide to get mage killed and So, and Cole's like, "God damn it." And so, they send Mage and Mage turns to a kick-ass dragon.
[snorts] And he flies down. He He picks up effortlessly all Reed and literally smokes burns all the demons. And then, of course, he uh he has like postnut clarity fatigue from turning into a dragon. And I this is one of my favorite character moments when after Mage gets exhausted by turning into a dragon, he literally asks for a smoke. And there's this wonderful moment where these two dudes are just having a cigarette >> at [laughter] the beach, right? and he's like he's like talks about how the beach talks to him. It's like it's a really good touch.
>> Yeah, he's great in these quiet character moments.
>> Um even at the end with post when all reads on the boat like there's this wonderful character moments when you know all and he describes mage as like a child, right? He's probably in a state of child childlike nature. He's strange, he's queer, not that way. And there's this weird strangers where even Ary, even though he's known him all his life, there's still sense of like fear with the mage. He's both like a weird demon god ghost thing while also being like a kid. He mentions that he's there something childlike in the way he talks to the ocean when they're having their smoke break after fighting 20 demons.
It's that it's one of my that's my literally my favorite moment is when him and mage are smoking together having just having a cigarette after the battle. That was a great quiet character one which is Blair is really good at.
>> Me too. But also I I don't want to do a total blowby-blow of the book which we kind of done for bit for the intro which is which is fine. I think is a good I mean maybe it'll tempt some people to pick it up.
>> Um >> well we have to go do a blowby-blow at least by when they finally get to the haunt cuz cuz he they hired mercenaries.
They got they got little prison slop.
They get a bunch of like thugs from the prison black boatmen. They call them black.
>> It's like you're all going to either you all die for sure or you all die for maybe.
[laughter] >> Yeah. Yeah. They pro promised him everything and Ary has to whip him into shape and do proper marching. And even to the black men, there is a humanization moment when Ary is marching them and he he takes out his idol of his god and and one of the boatman actually has the same religion I think and has a silent prayer with him. So there's a brief moment of shared humanity even with thugs.
>> And so logistic porn happens and the ATF actually comes eventually because so all Reed's cousin Helga the other go [laughter] >> ATF.
>> Yeah. ATF Janet Reno shows.
>> Yeah. You know, it's the HTF, right?
It's a haunting. Um, so the dough over there and [snorts] >> haunting tobacco and firearms. Okay.
>> Yeah. [laughter] >> Yeah. Unregistered red leaf cigarettes haunting.
>> They didn't pay the excise taxes.
>> Yeah.
>> There is no firearms, D. It's sadly another historical inaccuracy. By then they if they're doing full like uh if he's going full like age of sales, they were firearms. This is This occurs in the future uh after after the second phorean hyper war makes guns cease to exist.
>> Yeah. The Haitians ate them all. They're gone though.
>> Yeah. [laughter] >> Talk about buying the bullet, right? So So we get we finally get the gun.
>> Not the ammunition, the guns. That's ridiculous. Why would you say that?
>> Oh, yeah. Sorry. Yeah, the bul they bury the bullets. They try to plant them like berries.
>> That's right. [snorts] That's right.
>> Um Oh, [laughter] guns.
>> I do I do have a fruit question. So, um, >> sure you do. [laughter] >> Yeah. So, with strawberries, if you know, strawberries are covered with seeds. Are those like sterilized? Are they like chicken eggs?
>> My kids were just asking me this the other day.
>> You can plant those seeds.
>> Yeah. I was like, they're just seeds.
Like, they're just little >> They're just They're just seeds. Yeah.
>> Oh my god. So, >> what's the question?
>> Are strawberries plants?
>> Are you worried they're going to grow in your tummy?
>> No. No. No. No. No. What I'm saying is cuz if you if you buy a box like those little plastic berry boxes you get out plastic with holes in the bottom cuz if you get strawberries they're like there's like 20 seeds per berry right hypothetically.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. You could grow like a 100 berries yourself. You just [laughter] >> have you ever eaten an orange Gabe?
>> Did you know? Oh my god. Did you realize that if you take the seeds out of your produce and plant it, you could have free produce and all you'd have to do is spend all of your time growing plants?
[laughter] If Why isn't that a job of some kind?
Why isn't there a word for a person who plants seeds to grow plants?
>> This is some real academic agent. Hey, is the moon is up during the day. Is this normal? This is some real telling on yourself, hours. [laughter] No, no. I was just curious cuz I was eating a strawberries recently and you never really think about it, but you're like, "Oh, [ __ ] I can grow my like I just grow my own berries at this point."
I assume they sterilize the seeds, right? So they could have monopoly on the market.
>> That would be so much work.
>> That's [laughter] I just I assume they're like chicken, >> man. I'm sure I'm sure if Big Strawberry could [laughter] could reliably do that, they would. But they can't. So, >> um, yeah. Well, to be fair, there are some plants where the seeds come out like inert or whatever if it's like a weird hybrid or something. But it's that's it's definitely the exception for like most produce. You're good to go if you want to plant it.
>> How about with banana chips? Cuz bananas themselves don't have seeds cuz we bred out the seeds, but when you eat like plantains, they do have the seeds. And then when you when you eat like fried banana plantains, >> well, I go with a maybe.
>> Well, maybe not if it's fried. It's probably dead if it's fried.
>> Yeah, I think so, too, actually. And also uh bananas aren't lore accurate to the setting. They do have nuts. They have they have uh he mentions Oh god. In the postcript scribes mentions they have like dates like really shitty fruit.
Well, I forget what uh let's see.
>> The only Yeah. What's wrong with you?
>> So for a long time rows of cider, date and fig trees like nothing but bitter fruit, dude. So >> dates are [laughter] >> dates are the least bitter thing in existence. They're just [ __ ] sugar.
>> How is this happening again?
>> No, cuz they're all wrinkly. I >> [ __ ] alien. [laughter] Like, you just don't >> What was the one? The radish. This is radish 2.0.
>> This is radish 2. This is This is date gate.
>> Bitter dates. [laughter] >> No. Aren't aren't dates wrinkly? Like they're like they have like folds on them.
>> They're dried out when you buy them.
>> They're usually a little dry. But me dates have a lot of have a lot of um like moisture left in them. Like they're they're quite like almost um almost candyike. They're >> put a little bit of butter and a little bit of salt inside them and you close it. It's like the perfect >> or just [ __ ] eat it like >> Yeah. You just eat them plain too. Yeah.
It's like I don't like I I don't like the No, grapes are different. Grapes have normal texture. Well, dates they ah the texture is off. Yeah. I I would not like a little th I would I would rather >> texture kid >> Gabe being a texture kid is the least is the least unexpected thing I've ever heard in my life. Of course he is. This [ __ ] autist.
>> No, I hate Jell-O. I can't eat Jell-O.
It literally makes me gag.
>> Do you like Do you like raw onions?
>> Uh no. I like fried onions.
>> Yeah, I bet you [ __ ] didn't. Yeah, exactly.
>> Can't eat a raw Can't eat a raw onion.
Texture cell. Absolutely disgusting.
>> Also pickles. Pickles are my worst enemy. I would see I would cause a scene in my local McDonald's every time my mom forgot to ask for no pickles. I can't stand pickles.
>> Excuse me. He said no pickles.
>> Yeah.
>> Wait, so you don't like crunch? You don't like crunch and you don't like >> He doesn't He doesn't like smooth. And he also doesn't like crunch.
>> I don't like sour left.
>> Pickles are sour. Have you eaten a pickle? They're [ __ ] sour as heck.
>> I've had pickles that are sour. Yes.
>> A pickle.
>> I've had many a pickle. I like a pickle.
I'm a pickle man.
>> Oh, they're nasty. Oh, every time I actually delicious, >> you're crazy.
>> Oh, god. No, they're sour. They're literally acidic.
>> They're horrible.
>> Yeah, there's vinegar in them. Okay.
Yeah.
>> Yeah. Well, well, fried onion. There is I like a crunch. Yeah. Again, onions are good when they're fried cuz you get rid of like the the sour taste and the and the weird plastic feeling. You when you when you eat hamburger this you have sensory issues. You are hard spectrum. You're like a level two autist.
Yes, I have I it's it's called taste.
I'm not a sloth fiend that'll just eat anything in front of me.
>> I have standards.
>> Your ancestors lived off onions, dude.
>> Yeah. No kidding.
>> It's like degradation. [laughter] >> The If you didn't live in modern times, you would have like literally died.
>> I like I like horseradish. I like aspects of horseradish. It's like spicy bale kind of thing. [laughter] Or or like Yeah, I I eat iva. My grandpa liked iva a lot. I Yeah, like a jalapeno jam.
Yeah, I can I can I can stomach it. I can swallow it. is >> and and stone burner if you notice stone burner doesn't use spices like I got with his his soups he they noticed that it's filling and I think the kid Lookout doesn't mention it's bad I think the lookout mentions he likes the soup at a very least so at least at least uh I could eat stone burners food he's a very good cook you know he only makes he's a soup specialist he doesn't make anything but soup I think that's the only thing I eat is soup if you notice this >> it's camp food yeah I think just you got to have something you can just slop into people's bowls True. They don't also they don't eat the demons sadly. It would be cool if they actually ate the demon meat. They would [laughter] make >> you imagine they probably like burst out your chest.
>> I see you have not of course you have not read any of uh R. Scott Baker. But yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> Oh my god. Yeah. Yeah. The great march.
>> The [laughter] meat.
>> The meat.
>> Painted meat.
>> The meat that makes you gay. [laughter] Well, because homosexuality in this book, there's a but also there's very little sexuality in general because the thing that I just because it's not too sexy. It's not too sexy, >> dude. You know for a fact you know for a fact that Lookout >> Look Lookout was absolutely whacking it.
Yeah.
>> Oh, dude. As soon as Helga pops up, he is cracking the [ __ ] [ __ ] out of that rat. That racket is choked as soon as Yeah.
>> Yeah. No, because he does mention them being flushed. He does get lucky bastard does get slapped by Helga at one point.
the lucky bastard. [laughter] Those tears were tears of joy. Thank you very much. You know for a fact that night he was oh my god I wish. Imagine getting slapped by a girl. I have said some heinous [ __ ] to women multiple times hoping dreaming to get slept and he didn't say anything. He was nice. It was the downside fever. She just she needed she needed upside reset button in her ovaries to get [laughter] to get hit.
Outside women just need to get [ __ ] >> Mhm. So that was another other than the boy with leather slop. Also the lack of hoardiness, you know, as tuggers, I think we need more tug content. We need more tug tent. There was there need to be more tug tent in this dark fantasy.
>> I I think he could do it. I think this just wasn't the story for it cuz it's it's like kind of a remote location. You know, they're [clears throat] going the tunnel. You threw in the one woman in just for, you know, DEI credit probably.
But the next the sequel probably will be >> he needed he needed to show that she was actually not he it's great because he shows that she's actually not as capable as the men.
>> Yeah.
>> Well, and she's surrounded by a bunch of manlets. I mean, is there a message in this?
>> She gets all of her midgets killed.
>> Yeah.
>> One of them survives. One of them survives. One of them survive.
>> One of them goes insane but survives.
Yeah.
>> Yeah. Well, and also they deserve that.
They [ __ ] up the haunt. Um, she she should have [ __ ] his c her cousin, right? Because I thought that was what it was leading to.
>> Of course, you would say that.
[laughter] >> Yeah. No, no, remember in the lore, cousin just means like you're from a similar tribe. You're of our people.
She's not literally >> I know, but you said it that but you said it the way that Yeah, it was a little charged.
>> Yeah, I was as an official haunting of the island of Esmer as the running of the Phantom Wiki. I know the lore inside and out.
Thank you very much. Yeah, but you can imagine it the night before the haunt just to just once just once. I've been so lonely since my dead husband. Please, cousin, lay with [laughter] me.
>> I don't I don't want to I don't want to remarry. I just want to [ __ ] my cousin.
>> Yeah. Yeah. And all after after I'll read [ __ ] sir. He has a one last smoke thing.
>> Smoke. Oh, no. That was the PCB [laughter] one.
>> Oh, could you imagine the [ __ ] sash?
>> OH. OH, YEAH. LIKE HE LOOKS OUT AND he looks out in the in the forest and he sees the silhouettes of the two boys cuz they've been watching them [ __ ] through the like through the tent like they've been peeping toms actually look at him.
[laughter] >> He starts screaming dumb and she's like no that's just my Slimer.
>> You can see it. You can see it would have been great. It would been great tug tent, right? Look out sees cuz he's a knight. And remember all Reed is his like uh uh all uh Lookout is the squire of Allreed, right? So, he's learning how to ride a horse and he's learning how to [ __ ] a horse in many ways, right?
Because he he sees the silhouette. It actually it goes with the character arc.
It actually fits. It's not actually us writing fanfiction. It's actually us being lore friendly and to actually rejuvenate the core premise of the piece.
>> What you doing big? What you [laughter] doing in that? I'm stuck in this haunt.
Can someone help me? All right. I think I think this might be a sign to um closing thoughts and start seeds and everything. Yeah. Yeah. If you want to get us to the haunt and then I think we can do like closing thoughts and stuff.
>> Yeah.
>> So anyway, listen Blair, you're you're just jealous cuz Blair didn't make fan art of you.
>> You're you're this is seething Genesis.
This is reverse neism.
>> Seething. Yeah.
>> This is reverse nepatism.
>> It's the least he could do. So Helga, she used to be an actress. Um, and uh, she she has her rats. And rats, there were a a troop of jugglers and like dancers and like acrobats.
>> Jugalos. I'm just a tiny jugal. I'm just a jugalo anywhere I go. Right. And so there are rats. But thing is dur due to the fact of war economy.
>> Yeah. Tomato tomato. Right. So, so anyway, so the rats, uh, they actually literally got stopped in towns cuz the the for the first few months it was an uneasy kind of thing. The economy is still going, but after like month three, the war really started flaring up and they lost the license to like practice their artistry. So then it became they actually literally became bandits. Oh, she also married uh Scrolls brother cuz Scrolls is a Nepo baby and his village or his land is like right in between the lands. It's like a really like a if you can get his family to side with you, it would be major support for either faction. So she cucks scrolls by [ __ ] her actually cucks all as well and and and marries his brother and uh but after his brother dies his brother dies when they go out east in east are kind of like the wastelands, right? They're foreigners are nothing but banditry. The the rule of the mercenaries is the rule of the law. A lot of money can be made.
It's like a weird version of like Morocco during bandit times. It's very Indiana Jones. And yeah, they they've had some experience with demons going cave hunting. They go they go tunneling basically or caving, but it's nothing like a proper haunt. And so she becomes a bandit queen. She loses one eye. She has a hot eye patch. And uh and she fantasies about her her lost child she had with uh her brother, his brother.
[snorts] Not not literal in Scrolls brother. And then she finally comes back because she hears the ninth going on a haunting. and she wants to also participate in the haunting to finally make some big bucks because the rats are running out. They don't they have not made enough money back east in in the wasteland border town mercenary hell world of the east.
So she she tracks him down and she's like I I want to be a hunter too. She's like you know it's like the little little girl your little sister wants to turn on the controller too. That kind has that big feel to it at first and she's like oh yeah I have this super cool whip. I think she pulls pulls out like a really cool like magic whip um and puts on plunks on the table and talking to Cole and Cole's just smoking his pipe staring daggers at her deciding should we just kill the [ __ ] and just all her midgets and all Reed's trying to talk her down like listen cousin this is a real listen whatever you saw back east it's nothing like a proper haunt girl [snorts] of course her being big bad boss [ __ ] ignores his calls and his heings and his cockets and completely ignores him and so she joins point. She becomes a POV character and I think she's objectively the weakest POV.
>> Agreed.
>> Because >> Yeah, >> because she's the most normie. She has like uh like normie opinions. We get lore from her and she's a good character, but she to compare to what Lookout is doing and what Allreed is doing. Uh she doesn't offer much to the table in many ways.
>> She was who I had in mind when I made that comment about trimming down for more Lookout. That was exactly it.
>> For more Look T. We could have we couldn't got the look. [laughter] >> We could we could have got the look peeping Tom scene if it wasn't her [ __ ] [ __ ] blocking us. [snorts] >> And um and Helga joins them. And then of course they and uh while they're talking uh with all Reed uh the stone burner stone burner's job is to be a male nanny to both bof the native boy and the lookout and teaching him ways how to be logistics. And then the ATF comes and then when Lookout sees his proper battle and he doesn't have a Ernser approach to it yet again he he pissplays himself sadly and like war is like le badad right and he has his romanticism dashed away he doesn't have a violist approach to it sadly and of course he sees a man gargling on his own blood and then all comes he slits a man's throat from behind his back and you shouldn't stab a man behind his back and that kind of thing the battle scenes are good he actually writes combat very well the scenes with the ATF is actually a very strong scene I like that scene I I didn't like him cucking on the violist pro war thing. But other than that, it was great. I liked the scene quite a bit. And of course, he pissed his pants and and Stone Burner has to clean his pants and he goes and also I like the fact there was [ __ ] shame because B turns around like in native culture like men in real life in medieval Europe men like were naked amongst each other when they went to the bath house or bathed in a lake. They wouldn't have [ __ ] shame but for some reason there's [ __ ] shame here. Um so that I I did not care for that. But he gets new pants and they're a little too long. He has to roll them up and look out and not look out stone burner has to reso the pants and eventually they go up with the black men all reads guides the black men. They also have uh the ATF also had their version of glowies which is the offy like opa >> opi snake as in snake >> or op tree.
>> No, not oak tree. I know for the ops we'll call them the ops.
>> The ops ops. Yeah. And uh the ops, they're they're basically like uh their version of like uh the glowies for the Thronelanders. And they're basically just dark cultists. They worship a snake. They have their ears cut off and they literally have worms put into their brains RFK style.
>> And [laughter] uh and that's actually what happened to Lookout Lookout. That what's what happened to Scrolls's brother. He became an ops actually and had his ear cut and just got absolutely mind raped basically which adds and again with the subtle lore drops it because we all know there's a haunt underneath the throne land itself and the fact they use these clearly demonic evil like cults as feds. It it strongly hints that yeah the throne land has been corrupted but has been taken over by a cabal of a of certain magical tricksters.
>> Mhm. So they take it over by evil MSAD.
Um [snorts] so the oper goods, right?
[laughter] Who >> we all No, no issue here.
>> Yeah, exactly. And uh so the there's one op operative there, but he refuses to talk and he takes a poison pill and dies. They do manage to take one little twink uh from the regular Throne Lands with them. And so he's like, "Oh yeah, we'll let you live. Don't worry. We'll let you live. We'll let you have food."
And the Thorlander's like, "Thank God."
And I think it's the Reddit doctor. He's like, "Oh, don't thank us yet, little boy." A foreshadowing. And then they finally go all the way back cuz uh All scouted it a long time ago, but we finally after blueballing us for this long, we finally get to the gates of the haunt. And it was worth the wait. It's very heavy metal. They There's like a ghost visions. One of the black men sees a sees like a treasure and then it turns out it's a snake hanging from a tree.
The snake bites him. He has a really brutal death. There's evil birds that speak to you about the dead. All all Reed sees his bird tweet on it. Yeah.
Speaks the guy that fell out who got lost, I think.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. All All Reed, son of blank, remember all the people you have slain.
That kind of thing, right? So, you just see more magical [ __ ] slowly creeping up as they go up towards the haunt. And so, yeah, again, it he builds a tension beautifully and they finally have it.
And Ary looks to his hot cousin and she and he's like, "You're you're about to see how Colin's really going down, little girl." Right. And so they tie up the twink uh and May starts reciting the his little language, his little magical like verses and it starts literally I think it literally starts raining blood and they see flowers blooming and they see visions of the of the four times the previous cults and the previous people from back when the empire was the evil empire the past empire was still alive and the his body gets ripped apart by the gate. His leg gets torn off. He is just utterly consumed. They have to have a blood sacrifice every time in order to get into the haunted even to get into the door. Basically, it's a bloody passport. And so, she so Helga gets shook. All the dwarfs get shook. Um, Bof now Bof actually Bof is the pet twink of mage. Both actually can see mage even when mage is invisible. So, they they're grooming the boy to become their second mage. Um, well, look out. It's basically just a just a a chud. Um, basically just a chud.
>> He's just going to be a jock. He's just going to be a jock. Yeah. Yeah, he's a he's he's a romantic jock while he has a little uh twink sacrifice. He's sacrificing his friend's [ __ ] to mage in order to get to the island.
>> Hey, you know what? That's that's the it's the only way to teach magic. You know, it's the only way to do it.
>> Yeah. How how you think you got to learn to manipulate your spinter before you manipulate your knuckles, right? Um >> if you can manipulate your spinter, you can manipulate the the winds of mana.
>> That is true. Mana story in the male G-spot. [laughter] That's why that's how you activate. You got to hit the magic reset button in your anus. [snorts] So the and so was the did the haunt live up to the hype? Was it creepy enough? Did you think when they finally blue ball was the haunt worth the hype? Was it scary enough? Did have enough atmosphere for y'all? Because that was worried going in or was that would the haunt live up the hype or would it be kind of lame dungeon slump?
>> It was not it was not lame. It was uh it was quite quite good or I thought that uh Blair kept the atmosphere going really well. Uh yeah, it is usually a worry, right? You know, are we going to completely lose the vibes here? But no, I mean, I think he I think he maintained it. Uh there were there were enough like unexpected sort of classic traps. Um along with, you know, the sort of uh they'd been building up he had been building this up for a long time, right?
you know, the the rest of the book was just about how otherworldly the haunts were.
And uh when you finally got there, I think the payoff was was sufficient, right? I think it I think that they got uh there were he he moved the sort of uh edges and boundaries of the narrative enough that it really felt like a very distinct other place >> from from even the you know the exotic island that was above them.
>> So yeah, there's some great Yeah, I love the fact the first demon to see is a is an old mage demon with the bronze. Yeah.
Again, he he does a great front show straight up. You see this little lard drop of this demon of with of a leftover bronze mask stitched into his face or melted into his face. And you just hear the screams of black men, right, of the thugs they sent in.
>> Black men.
>> Yeah, I I I prefer the black men uh version.
>> Black guys is cannon fodder.
>> It was a great like uh not oversharing details like like you said with the mass detail. It's not like called out and like excruciating detail.
It's not. You've been teased with just enough info to like kind of wet your appetite. And even once you're in, it's not understandable.
>> It's not like, "Wow, a mask on the monster." Meaning it must have been a mage because [laughter] mages wear bronze masks if you remember from the previous scene. Yeah. It's not >> as Bob.
>> Yeah.
>> It was It's because think about it because when when Mage turns to the dragon, he still keeps his mask as he turns to the dragon. So, it's a good lore consistency call back. That's that's and also I I love the fact that they're led around. It's actually the back rooms, by the way, because they have unlimited doors. It's like a medieval version or like a fantasy version of the back rooms, right? And they're being led around by this boar who's he's laughing and giggling and they see this tree and they see all these depictions of torture and they find a black dude uh strapped into like a [ __ ] electrocution thing. He's just howling and screaming and foaming and and all has to put a bolt in his head and and all gets like he gets like upside down sickness like super quick like starts seeing visions. Um Helga is getting like Alpha Widow cucked by the vision of her aborted baby she had or no I guess it'll be like a like a pre-order miscarriage basically. She she never got to have the baby. So it's a so it's more like a premiscarriage. She sees visions of the daughter she would have with uh with uh um Scrolls's brother and uh she's being immediately haunted and the dwarfs start tweaking and um and oh and a stone burner and the and the boys are back and they're basically playing support and they also put a tattoo the Reddit doctor uh puts a tattoo of the eye they say on her left arm or a arm I don't know if it's the left arm and so the arm tattoo works as kind of like a FaceTime call. Basically, they can at any point they can FaceTime uh Stone Burner to give him reports and vice versa.
>> Yeah.
>> So, they're they're being led around by this boar, but it's a little demonic little boar, Windsy Lord kind of boore.
And [snorts] they they finally find they find these orbs inside. It's kind of like Indiana Jones. They find these orbs that are sitting in like these uh bracers. And uh so they have this equipment. They have like this pipe.
They have like pipe filled with foam that >> it's like a like a blacksmith thing, right? What do you call that? It's not >> I think it's like a tube. It's like almost like a pseudoplastic tube.
They're going they're going to feed foam into it to slowly like uh dislodge the orbs. Of course, the [ __ ] dwarfs, the juggling dwarfs will seize the the statue of the boar and immediately goes to it, tries to grab it and causing them to [ __ ] collapse. And um they end up and uh scrolls. Scrolls is actually oddly enough other second to only Cole.
Scrolls is just mostly immune to upside down sickness. I don't think we get we have we don't have any scroll tweaking scenes. Mhm.
>> I think do you remember any tweaking scenes from that?
>> Uh I think he does complain about the effects on him and he's like basically it's like I have I have a little bit longer, [laughter] right?
>> But yeah, >> he's he's he's got uh low affect with regards to that type of thing. Yeah, >> he's too too busy updating his wiki, you know, all the lore facts about the previous previous priest class and all the dark lords. And they eventually find the room filled with gold. I think I think it was the priest class like burial tomb. They find the skeletons of the priest, recall correctly. My memory is a little foggy here. Yeah.
>> But they they finally fill it with gold.
All reed gives uh Helga her participation trophy, which is a gold bowl. They they they finally find the giga orb that's still like a hyper magic that can like uh that that's like they become finally rich just off the orb basically >> like you can you can feed 20 battle mages with this basically >> and then of course uh the dwarfs start tweaking one of the dwarfs die actually I think almost all the rats die in the haunt uh if I recall literally 95% of the dwarfs die in the haunt the only they actually were remarkably successful in the haunt because they find they also find the dragon I think they call it a leatherwing which is again a naming convention is great.
>> Yeah.
>> And uh >> I mean they're not like a you might be thinking of like a you know fullsize huge but there are a lot of these things. They're like a smaller sort of fantasy creature, right?
>> Yeah. And it's sad they don't keep him as a pet. They they break him out of the haunt, but they sadly he goes flying around the volcano. Volcano explodes.
They totally just rape the the natives here by unleashing hell uh lava dragons and also the [ __ ] ops onto the island. Cuz while they're in the haunt, the ops show up and they start torturing uh the villagers, making them do their like demon dance, necromancy dancing and stuff like that. And uh basically the ops are slowly climbing up the mountain using their slave labor [snorts] uh to go uh to wear Lookout. And uh and Bof has a vision seeing the ops actually. And the thing is the ops can see him back and and stone mason stone cooker stone smoker is like uh is dude as soon as the ops showing up [ __ ] run don't say anything just run and he prepares for it so you have tensions on both sides you have tensions in the haunt and tensions are building up in the upside world as well right so you're you're the tension is uh so when you cut back to lookout or cut back to the upside you're not being tension cut you're still you're still having your balls squished upon on either left ball or right ball the upside one or the downside And but it's remarkably it's a success.
Not even the Reddit doctors dies. I don't think any members of the ninth actually even get really harmed. I mean um >> one of the a after after they get out of the haunt one of the giant twins um is pretty severely maimed, >> but that that happens in their fight as they try to, you know, [clears throat] evac with the um yeah with the uh with those enemies. Yeah, that that that was a post honity moment because he gets [ __ ] he gets crippled >> clarity. Yeah, he gets he get he gets [ __ ] he gets [ __ ] cut basically that's a post haunt thing >> and >> well they had a meat shield with the the black boatman you know I guess maybe that's the what is supposed to breed into it >> I don't know do you think I I think one of the ninth sort of died because supposed to be their last gig you know what I mean is that classic setup >> I mean look I feel like this is a I feel like this is supposed to be the beginning of a of a series. I It should be the beginning of a series, but yeah, it's uh you can't you can't blow the whole squad on the on the first book.
>> They should have just killed Helga. Just throw just throw her in. [laughter] >> Just [ __ ] put her in the grinder.
>> No, she needs to get [ __ ] first. She needs to get [ __ ] down first, right?
There's there's clearly romantic tension between her and all Reed.
We We can't live We can't She has to have the upside reset button touched at least once. [snorts] So they So they let out the let out the leather wing, right?
And uh it starts flying around the volcano. The volcano's erupted. They're like, "Oh, boys. Okay, we got the score.
We won, right? And okay, we got to get get out of dodge as quickly as possible.
It's been a resounding success." And of course the ops show up and and uh well the far most furthest he goes is I think the dwar the leftover rats die from the ops and one of the giants also gets get crippled. leg, right?
>> Other than that, still a resounding success. There's not really much uh >> so at the and we finally get to the postcript. We finally get some good scroll tent and he and so yeah, this is where where the meta narrative comes in because this is it ends on it begins with an episttolary note and it ends in an episttolary note which is the postcript by scrolls. And so they they finally get out of dodge. They get the boy. The the all Reed promises to make him a knight. And all this is great scene after they still they're still sick with downside fever. Downside sickness. And and uh so and Helga not only is she on her menses, she's also has like retroactive baby fever and she has downside sickness. So she is just tweaking and and and lookout's like and she's like screaming at the boy, you should have left us. You should have killed us. You can't let these boys join you. That's insane. She starts moral fagging and Lookout just like scared like, "Oh, miss, I want to be a knight.
I just want to be a knight, man." And she just slaps the [ __ ] out of him. And then uh all and all Reed has to manhandle her and like hugs her and and and listen, all Reed is also he has to drink multiple like downside potions in the haunt. He himself is tweaking. He blacks out trying to look for his like a little idol in his pocket. And uh Stone Burner has to keep a crossbow at his face at all times when because when you as soon as you come out you the highest chances of you fully tweaking aren't when you're in the haunt. It's it's the upside fever cuz you you feel like the he says it's your spirit is feel like you're everything is enhanced the feelings the emotions like the spirit is floating away on a cliff or something along those lines. [snorts] But he has one last red leaf smoke in his pocket.
It's not full it's not full multis falcon. I do kind of feel I do kind of feel like he had his last cigarette like 12 times.
>> Yeah.
>> It always felt like it always felt like that pack was like [laughter] >> Yeah. Always always one. Yeah. The infinity last cigarette. Every cigarette's your last. [laughter] >> Yeah.
>> Quit smoking.
>> Yeah. He has one shitty bent cigarette left. He's trying to have his smoke. The smoke is helping him. He's looking at fire and his damn [ __ ] is raging right now. So he has to manhandle her and hug her [snorts] and then but that's basically the end of it really. Ma Oh yeah yeah mage gets you know when you try to jerk off but you already came so your dick starts burning after you jerk off because you forgot to eat beforehand. That's kind of what mage suffers.
>> Mhm.
>> And uh it it may be permanent basically.
Mage is basically fully like goon magic out basically and they can't find a mage doctor. So that that they leave mage.
What happens to mage on a cliffhanger?
But they do have the twink boy that they can train in the magical arts.
Um and so yeah, so basically they leave back to uh fund the uh the global inifatada against the throne landers, but they've it's revealed that most of the resistance is basically dead. They try to show up to sell or to give supplies or sell stuff and the contacts don't show up. It turns out that most of the Ninth's agents have been slaughtered by the ops. So it ends on a real big cliffhanger and all Reed is on a boat at the end. He feels the the feet um the ship swaying. He doesn't like it, but he's a soldier and like soldiers always learn to sleep in uncomfortable places or something along those lines. Another banger line from Blair and it ends on a cliffhanger all reed throws the cigarette into the water and he he takes the boy's statue and a crossbow goes down to to the bed and sleep and it ends right there basically after he's already taught the boy how to ride a horse in the middle. the [ __ ] doesn't know how to stand properly at the end. Um, so you see the dynamics already. You can already see you you're craving the second book by dead because you could already see the character dynamics playing out in your head and during the time you're just feeding for more. You you he turns you into a sloppy. You have downside fever by the end of it because you're just feing for more basically.
>> Yeah. Yeah. You can really envision because he left a lot of really clear hooks like called out. Um, so it's like it's it's sequel bait. Bring us the sequel. Bring us uh what what's it gonna be? Is it gonna be another haunt? I feel like it's got to be another haunt. Is that the identity?
>> It should be it should be another haunt.
>> Yeah.
>> Well, yeah. The haunting of the throne lands, right? Because obviously there's a there's a there's a >> I think you need like a book or two to build up to that. But that that is to me like the natural final boss that it's like that's what you're building out the whole series up towards is you got to reclaim the capital and the the king you the king you once served is actually demonically possessed.
>> Mhm. But it takes a while, man. They're down to they're down to zero at the end of this.
>> Yeah. And Cole and the thing is she she's like why doesn't he never get affected? Why ask and all starts actually suspecting. Yeah. Why does Cole just raw dog a haunts?
>> Like >> why can he just eat that [ __ ] Yeah, >> it it's it's clearly it's very much hinted that all re uh that Cole basically is just like has a suicide death drive at this point and basically leading them to their deaths. And so there's obviously implications of a heel turn with Cole despite he has a magnificent pipe. He's a >> I I feel like there aren't I feel like there's there's no way.
>> Yeah.
>> Excuse me. Have you read this book in the last two weeks, Mr. Cap? I have not read it in the last two weeks.
>> But Gabe, you did you have said the black men like a hundred times and a few a few other um >> Well, listen, I'm not gonna It's for the sake of abbreviation to save time. I'm not going to say black boatmen every time. We'll be here all night if I said that.
>> I noticed that you didn't say the boatman either. [laughter] >> Black is more evocative. [clears throat] You You can vision in your head.
>> Yeah, I do. I do.
>> [laughter] >> And let's be honest, they're criminals, so what are the odds? Um, >> yeah. Anyway, >> that's the haunt, baby. And Gabe dragged us through blowby-blow protests. Thank you.
>> That's good.
>> Yeah, I loved it. Thank you. Thank you.
Uh, >> what's your name?
>> Really [ __ ] If I could reread it, >> if I could reread it and experience it for the first time again, I would. It's worth a reread. It's it's it's a very >> it's a very fun read. Again, again, Blair is not a pro stylist. The he he tries to write poetry multiple times or recite poetry. The poetry is not very good, but um he does again his strongest thing is characterization. All all the ninth is extremely strong. Lookout. It's a great character. It's it's pure even the otman. The some of the villagers somehow survive the ops and the otman.
And then even the Otman gets characterization in the end cuz he's not a Yokal. He knows politics. He knows all Reed's not a throneer. He's like, "Yeah, you're bullshitting me, kid, but we owe your lives to you. So yeah, you could take the boy." Right. So even for it, bud. [laughter] >> Yeah. So he still gives them lastm minute characterization for small characters like the Otman and like Cole's like you don't live long enough to retire and and be a fool and honest and you know he he's slowly teaching even the boy lookout starts to learn like I am not wise enough to know and you're like oh already you're learning boy. You know what is it? To be wise in the islands to live a very good life, but to be wise in the throne room is to get involved in politics which certainly means your death. You know, that's another really good line uh from from Blair.
>> So [snorts] yeah, he is a very practical pro stylist and his strongest work is the characters, the dialogue and again these handful of really banger moments and lines. the smoking scene of Mage.
Um, all Reed on the beach with Mage. The the lookout getting absolutely turned by watching magical herbs with with Buff.
Uh, the haunt itself, the combat scenes.
It's just a [ __ ] fun adventure story.
It's a really strong adventure story. If you like logistics porn, if you like camping, if you like leather slop, actually, it's not it's not leather shop. It's he he's not defined by genre.
Blair contains many multitudes and it's it's just a very fun frolicking adventure story. I would love a tabletop campaign based on this. I think he drips feeds the lore. He doesn't lure dump. He drip feeds the lore. He he turns you into a slump and you just crave more Blair tent. Give us the Blair tent.
Blair, >> give us the Blair tent. That's right.
>> Drop the Blair bomb. But um All right.
If you guys are good, I mean I think I've said everything I got on it. Good good book. Good stuff, Blair. Keep it up. Love you, bro. And all that. Um, >> hey, what do we have coming up next?
What's our next episode on?
>> Dude, we've been debating that.
>> We've been [sighs] We've been debating.
>> We got non-fiction. We got another delve into like sci-fi fantasy. Maybe >> maybe >> I don't want to say it though. It could go either way.
>> Well, listen, we've been there a dry spell. Honor Levy has not released her second book sadly. So, there's been a bit of a dry spell.
>> It's crazy. It's crazy. It's Gabe. But I feel like Gabe is Gabe is aching for a wet spell. [laughter] >> Exactly. Listen, ladies. Ladies, we listen >> ladies.
>> Ladies, we have >> needs a wet spell.
>> We have doubledigit numbers here. We have double-digit female participants.
You could be a lucky lady. You can have a book published. You can have reviewed.
And it comes as a package. You can have a husband. You can have a podcaster husband with prestige and networks.
husband. That's a big jump.
>> Yeah, [laughter] it's an all in one bundle. It's one DM, one titty pick, one vagina examination. [laughter] I'd prefer innies. If you have like those weird like chopped like uh like those weird like flesh butterfly things, you know the vaginas I'm talking about, right? [laughter] Like it's like a chopped onion. If you have an innie, if you got a nice horseshoe looking one, like a two camo like what camel don't come wrong like a nice camel lip one especially like listen that is your guaranteed ticket to a positive book review on Tokies Mag and a positive lineage like literally it's a sort of mating right you you get to breed with the most high status male of Tokies Mag actually because I'm available and uh so yeah so it's a here's a wife call and a book call as suggest of course >> put in your put in your applications to be Gab's mother.
>> Literally sending up send Bob and the Jean uh the brownest the the brownest member of Ticky's bag. [laughter] >> Hey, I'm the only one not race mix.
Thank you very much. Take several seats back. Thank you very much. [laughter] >> Your white ass down listen.
>> All right. Thank you. Sincerely, if you listen this far, >> please like, comment, subscribe, all that stuff. It really does make a difference.
>> Check out all the other stuff we'll do will be linked. Justin stuff will be linked, etc. >> Except Except for Slokings. Don't check out Slopkings.
>> No, it's the best god. Diner gods.
>> The more the more you check out Slopkings, the less you check out Sidebar.
[laughter] >> Well, listen. Well, actually, you know what? as the voice of the third estate since we have a third estate structure sir in this triumphant I am I represent the voice of the people I'll be publishing a plebbyite on our discord server and we will >> pleb >> well what also emphasis on the site because I'll be citing the votes and tally up the citations of the votes when I uh confront the other two triumphant members of their denial the next reading >> this is how you know this is how you know Gabe isn't the patrician member of the of the uh of the Tokies Mag crew because any any real any real aristocrat knows that the we don't care about plebites. We only care about plebside.
>> True.
>> Yes. All the people who are watching this [ __ ] for free for this is a two-hour review. We give you two hours of content and you're just you're probably only been watching this. You're probably >> We recorded for five hours and Dave edited out so much of it [laughter] and we could have kept it all if if any of you were subscribed to the >> We each individually recounted the entire story actually. So, you're missing it. It was mostly Gabe recounting every single thing that happened, but me and Cap also did it in turn.
>> Yeah. IE I negotiated the rights for the manga adaptation to this book uh on a on a live call with Katakawa >> uh during during this recording. It was very fast. That was actually only 15 minutes. [music] So think of what you've missed out on.
>> Yeah, dude. We had a Larry himself actually jumped in and he himself also recounted the entire [music] plot.
>> He said he said that this actually happened to him. So like he's mage. He's mage.
So for a long time, rows of cider, date, and fig trees like nothing but bitter fruit, dude.
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