미국은 독박육아가 없을까?

Added: 2026-05-09

[00:00:00]It turns into a fight.

[00:00:01]And you don't you just deal with it. I can blame nobody. I got to do what I have to do. You say something it hurts and it's never going to change after you hurt somebody. Yeah, most of the time I feel like a lot of the load work falls on me.

[00:00:49]Hi.

[00:00:50]Wait.

[00:00:51]Doctor appointments. You don't know. All of it is invisible to the partner because you don't even know where your day goes. But when you make one meal by the time you clean up you're into the next meal into the next and it's hard to explain when you do laundry, doctors, and their extracurricular activities, their education. It's all encompassing.

[00:01:10]It turns into a fight. And you don't you just deal with it.

[00:01:14]I'm the default guy in the house. It's a little harder cuz you got to split your time for the sleep, for work, for taking your baby, taking care of yourself, doing groceries. It's a little harder but traveling around work. Sometimes like you got to like be like 2-3 hours in the traffic. And on top of that like you got like bad coworkers they make you harder and then you got like go at home, quiet, come back, do it again. Cuz you cannot bring that stress to your to your house. So you got to like take care of all that stuff. Doctor appointments. Doctor appointments. Honestly, I'm in school full time so I kind of do that by myself. So I'm in school while I'm with her. I'm on online school from Monday to Thursday. Oh, really? So When partner worked then I stayed home. And I did most of the chores. Me. Because I was stay at home mom and I took care of my children. Me. But like in actuality with them misbehaving at the moment, yeah, it's a lot for one person to have to deal with. So how did you deal with it?

[00:02:18]You just deal you just do it. You have no choice. You you can't get up every day and feed them and take care of them no matter what. Whether you have a husband or a wife you still have to take care of them. So you have no choice. I just dealt with it. And I appreciated that I could stay at home. So even if I felt solo I really came from a place of appreciation that I didn't have to leave my kids with a nanny or anybody else and I got to take care of them. No communication on that.

[00:02:43]You just do it. The plan was he's going to work and take care of that and deal with the finances and I'm going to do the rest. That's how it works. It would turn into a fight.

[00:02:52]I'd rather to like quiet and like walk away like for 5 minutes. If I can't I just tell them like I can't. I try to fix with some something else. Like I cannot be fighting cuz that's the main issue. Like you say something it hurts and it's never going to change after you hurt somebody. Cuz I think I have her most of the days. I feel like a lot of the load work falls on me. How did did you ever address it?

[00:03:15]>> No. No. Okay. Yeah, sometimes she's so busy but I can't blame nobody. I got to take care. I got to do what I have to do. You work it. You going to get at the baby. Now you got to change your mind and you have to take care. So you can't take care somebody going to suffer a lot.

[00:04:09]We co-parent very well so He's very present in her [music] life. Um we split the days. So he'll have her on like Sundays and Fridays and Mondays and I'll have her the rest of the days that are available.

[00:04:21]It's me and my ex-husband. We're both the default parents. We're both very involved in our children's lives.

[00:04:27]He would go to work and I would take care of the children and the housework. But on weekends he would be home and he would help with the children and the housework. When I'm at work she she going to take care of me. When I'm at home I take care of some of the stuff she cannot handle it. So be equal.

[00:04:44]I address when he's not helping enough.

[00:04:46]I'll just let him know like if there's something that he can help me with which he's pretty good with. So You have to have good communication and good relationship skills already. So you both have to be equal and willing to say like maybe you're very tired tonight but like I'm very tired two nights from now and we both have to work together to pick up the slack of the other one on the days where we're just too exhausted.