Parents report feeling pressured to participate in too many school activities

Added: 2026-05-06

[00:00:00]As a mom of two school age kids, I can definitely relate to this. The author of that article says collectively as parents we should be doing less.

[00:00:09]>> [music] >> The Holderness family, known for their relatable parenting videos, recently poked fun at the constant requests schools make of parents.

[00:00:19]>> Reader of the day Thursday, yes, all the things. I think it's funny. I will see things in the group chat and I'll write is was there another email that I missed? And it's like, yes, there was another email.

[00:00:30]Mom of two, Rachel Straus, says keeping up can feel impossible, but she still feels obligated.

[00:00:35]>> Shannon, I'm a working mom. I feel all of the pressure, right? Of course I do.

[00:00:39]I uh overly volunteer. I feel like I need to do all the things.

[00:00:43]>> A recent New York Times op-ed called Parents Consider Underachieving argues those expectations have gone too far.

[00:00:50]Author Rachel Feinzag wrote, "I dream of a day we can all take it down a notch without shame." On CBS Mornings, she shared her breaking point.

[00:00:58]>> Last year I was sitting in the vestibule of my kids' school. I had four events that I had to be at from 9:00 to 3:00. I had my laptop, it's super hot, I'm trying to work, and I'm just thinking, like, this is crazy. Who wants to be doing this?

[00:01:11]>> She points to a non-stop list of activities from math mornings to poetry picnics and notes that many of us didn't grow up with this level of parental involvement. So, what's changed? Mom of two, Yesenia Arroyo, says social media plays a big role. With social media, also the need to document everything compared to when our parents uh when I was growing up, I mean, that didn't exist. So, I'm sure my parents had an easier time saying no to a lot of things because that pressure doesn't wasn't there.

[00:01:43]Um but yeah, I've definitely felt that.

[00:01:45]>> Yesenia runs the popular Instagram page San Diego Girl Mom, sharing free activities and money-saving tips. She says learning to say no has been key, and so has surrounding herself with other moms who do the same.

[00:01:56]>> I've even started hanging out with certain friends that are more like underachieving on the mom side because, you know, it's like who you surround yourself with, and it really works. Like the op-ed, she believes doing less can actually help you be more present.

[00:02:09]>> Being more intentional, being more present kind of falls along with it.

[00:02:13]>> Rachel Straus agrees, emphasizing what matters most.

[00:02:17]>> They know that I'm there for them.

[00:02:18]That's the most important thing. Shannon Handy, News 8.

[00:02:21]That's right. I love that advice, being intentional. Um and I love this conversation because I think two things can be true at the same time. It can be amazing and wonderful to do these events, but it can also be a lot and overwhelming and exhausting. That's okay you're feeling both of them, and maybe it's going to give people a little bit more um permission to give themselves to say no.

[00:02:42]>> I don't think you always want to say no.

[00:02:44]You want to be involved some, you want to do something, but you also don't need to be pressured all at all into saying yes every time. And if there's something that you're not comfortable with, saying no is fine. It's It's hard enough being a parent. The additional peer pressure and all that just remove that from yourself. Be the best parent you can be for your kid.

[00:03:00]>> And maybe not all of the things that you show up to everything is perfect and you've got you've done everything off Etsy and Pinterest. Just be there.

[00:03:08]>> And and no is a complete sentence sometimes. It really is.