Avery's Story | Active Consulting

Hinzugefügt: 2026-05-30

[00:00:02]I would tell someone, don't give up. You have a happy life coming towards you and it's okay.

[00:00:14]I've been around children my whole life, but I'd never seen a child so withdrawn and um not accepted for who she is. And she was struggling so hard just communicating. So instead of being able to communicate to you, she would be angry. So it was screaming and yelling and if she didn't get her way. So it was it was a challenge. It was a challenge.

[00:00:39]She came from a broken home and her father was in prison and she has a little sister and a mom that is addicted. At my old school back when I lived in Mount Ida, I used to be in a tiny self-contained room with only two kids that knew how to talk and two the other two were couldn't talk at all and I only had them as friends and I was doing only third grade level. She couldn't even tie her own shoes at 14 and um never had the ability to join other activities with kids because she was very violent and angry, suicidal, homicidal.

[00:01:24]>> We had Avery in that revolving door, constantly going to these acute settings. Um so in and out of emergency rooms, uh lots of referrals for psychiatric residential treatment uh um facilities. And the referral on the books when we got involved uh was to be an intermediate care facility which is a really restrictive level of care for an adolescent kid.

[00:01:47]>> Avery felt so defective you know she she never had any she never wanted to take a shower or brush her hair do things you know because she never had anyone stand by her and believe in her. And it really Benchmark changed the course of these two years, almost three that um Avery and I have been together because she realized that man there are people that really do care. They're not just telling you that, you know, to pacify you or make you be quiet. And they actually spent time with her doing things she loved. You would be amazed at the amount of staff that don't know their client's birthday, but we do. You'd be amazed at the amount of staff that don't know their favorite food, but we do. And, you know, we go in, we do person centered needs assessments based off of preferences, you know, foods, clothes, holidays, goals. What goals do you want to accomplish? And one year from now, what do you want to be doing?

[00:02:58]And guess what? we're gonna help you get there.

[00:03:01]>> Yeah, I think the way Benchmark engages and stabilizes is is really important.

[00:03:07]They they're modeling that person- centered approach I think that we all need to follow. I think a lot of what they do. I I don't know if they I I know that they consider diagnostics and that's a very important piece. testing is a very important piece, but I think it's really more important, at least what how I've seen them work is just the individual in their environment and their support system and really looking at that and not getting caught up in well, you know, it's this or it's this.

[00:03:33]It's just what do they need? How are they behaving? What do they need to behave differently and be happier or more stable?

[00:03:40]>> The benchmark experience changed the game. When I got the call and I decided to foster her, what changed was I finally saw hope because honestly, she only knew violence. So, she would call me names, cuss me out, threaten to harm everyone in the house. She was going to run away. Just she would lay on the floor and beat her head on the floor and scream, "Help me. Help me." You know, it was it was so sad and tragic. But she would say, "Why don't you just give me back? That's what everybody does. Just give me back." And I said, "No, girl. I was in the military. You can't break me.

[00:04:23]You know, we were going to fight through this together." I didn't birth Avery, but I have had the joy of watching this transformation and and see her turn into a beautiful young lady because of the investment that Mitchart made. And that's an incredible feeling when you see a child hurting herself, wanting to die. Um, you know, wanting people to get rid of her because she doesn't feel like she has a purpose.

[00:04:52]>> Now we're officially a family, and I'm very blessed for it. She's a very kind, smart, and loving, and intelligent mom.

[00:05:00]>> Well, you know, now Avery attends high school. She's in the 11th grade. She goes to regular classes. She has seven blocks of classes she goes to. She has been on a bowling team, one second place in a bowling league. She dances.

[00:05:18]>> I see my friends, my teachers, and it's fun. I love learning. I love my friends.

[00:05:27]I do math, English, um, US history, photography.

[00:05:36]She's got confidence and a glow. She has dreams. She wants to go to college and she has a boyfriend. You know, that's been her life goal. You know, it's really interesting though that Avery is so in tune to other people now. like she she has such empathy. When she sees a child that's struggling, she immediately wants to help them.

[00:06:03]>> It makes me feel great. I love that to know that I'm helping other kids like me.