Richards brilliantly exposes how the social skill of "reading the room" often creates a wall of loneliness that prevents true connection. It is a sharp reminder that the more we adapt to others' expectations, the more we lose our authentic selves.
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Deep Dive
미국 샘리처드 교수 "최근 한국 영상 중 가장 충격적" 이수지 패러디 영상 분석Added:
I'm going to say Sam Richards here. We are introducing a new series on the channel and we're calling it think big.
And what we're going to do in this series is take one specific topic and connect it with people's real experience and look at it through a sociological lens. [music] And the goal is to slow down and think together. So these days, you know, not many people get a chance to really ask [music] what do I actually think? And we want to do that in this series back and forth. So viewers say what they think, I say what I think, and better understand sociology.
And that is thinking big.
So today we're going to start off by talking about a video that I just watched by the comedian Euji. And it's this video in which she plays the role of a kindergarten teacher.
[snorts] [laughter] One day on one hand, it's [music] very funny. On the other hand, it's actually kind of disturbing in a way. And what's so fascinating is there's so many people watched it. It went viral in Korea. So many of you have seen it. And I'm sure you are both laughing at it and feeling kind of sheepish or strange about it.
You know, like these two things always like how is this possible and why is this happening? And yet it's really funny. And so, you know, trying to find the space to make sense of this video.
>> Um the one of the one thing I like to do on the last day of class is take questions. [music] And I thought it would be really nice to pick out some volunteers who didn't have a chance to volunteer.
Have you ever encountered?
>> My [music] experience leaving class yesterday was a common one and has been something that I've been experiencing [music] for my entire 43-year teaching career.
And what happened was I left the classroom feeling kind of lonely. And I realized that I often feel lonely and I feel alone and I feel really really tired. The last point about being tired, I've always thought well it's because I give a lot of energy in the class. You know, I'm moving around and making energy. But yesterday I that wasn't the case. I was just really sitting on the table and answering questions from students and I felt alone.
And so the other day, um, I have my first thoughts about why this might be happening, why so often after class and certain situations I feel lonely and I feel tired. And the explanation involved two things. One, it involved a sociological understanding of Duni. And two, it involved a video that I watched by the Korean comic Isuji in which [music] she plays the role of a kindergarten teacher. I translated the video and I watched the entire thing and I found it really really fascinating.
But I want to start with this sociology of nunchi [music] and you know reading a room is it's not just a Korean thing. I mean people in every culture all over the world um they we read rooms, we study people, we study things around us and the reason for that is because people need to get along.
People want social stability and they want to be able to integrate themselves into groups because that's part of our very survival as humans. But the fact that Koreans have a word for it means that it's really really important in Korean culture. But fitting in is the opposite of being ourselves.
And in being ourselves is what really energizes us, right? So we can be who we want to be in all these situations. But by contrast, not being ourselves in social situations is a primary source of loneliness because nobody ever really gets to know who we are. So even though we're in these social situations, we're really alone because we are not being our authentic true selves. And this is why in my culture, uh, for example, it's not uncommon to find out that the person who's the most gifted at being in a group situation, we call them a social butterfly [music] because the butterfly flaps its wings all over and just goes to lots of different places. [music] It's not uncommon for us to find out that that social butterfly suffers from some kind of depression. It's like, wait, that person is depressed because that person's really social. They're happy. [music] They're funny. Every time I see them, they're a really good listener. They're very likable. How could they possibly be [music] depressed? But the issue is that person never reveals him or herself in these social situations, [music] right? and the more the better they're able to integrate the less of themselves that people have to actually come to know. So in my class what I realize of course is that I need to be really likable to my students because students learn when their teachers are likable people and if we're not likable they don't learn from us. Okay, so this brings me to the comic Is what she reveals is how this the success of someone in her position is really dependent on likability. So teachers in this case and in Korea so many parents don't make it easy to be a teacher because the teacher has to be so many things to so many parents and so many students and every [clears throat] single parent has the idea that their child is special and so you're going to make special demands of teachers. Okay, maybe not every single parent. And so this is an issue. I mean, you know, this this is an issue that's talked about in Korea. And it's, of course, one of the reasons that the video went viral in the first place is because people see something in that video that is true.
And you know, I read, for example, that half of all teachers in Korea report that they experience malicious complaints from parents. Now maybe I would have the same thing except that you know my students are college age and so [music] not many parents get involved in the education of their kids in that way. But what ESG does is such a great job of making fun of some of these malicious complaints. It's a serious issue. Like for example, the line there are some very funny lines about, you know, she's talking about teaching these kindergarten students about trading stocks and I only trade blue chip stocks. I mean, the absurdity of that, right? Of course, how absurd is it really? and or the one about where uh I used to use a Galaxy phone but you know the parents decided that you know it wasn't it didn't have the right aesthetic and so therefore I had to switch to an iPhone. It's absurd and hilarious at the same time. But the issue is loneliness and depression rates are really high among teachers [music] all over the world. In fact, in the US, depression rates among teachers [music] is double that of other professions. And I'm thinking that maybe I have a better understanding of how this is true because the teacher, as is true with many, many different [music] people, managers, people who are engaging many different people, they have a very difficult time being themselves because they have to blend in or they have to, you know, read the room constantly and be what other people need them to be.
And that's a very very difficult thing.
So who are you? People don't get to know us. And you know in fact what's really strange is that I almost never ever feel any kind of loneliness or depression me personally except when I leave my classroom. And it has been true since the very first class I ever taught because I have really high levels of nunchi as you would say. And I'm really good at reading the room and I'm really good at understanding what my students need and what they need to hear from me.
So now I'm really curious about what you think. The these are just some ideas that I have, but you know, think big.
this this new series that we're doing on the channel is really an opportunity for us to think together in this way to engage one another that I want to explore certain topics with you but I need to hear from you with your comments. What I can do is kind of sort through them and then use those comments to better explain or express the sociological perspective. So I will use the comments in the next videos.
Thank you. Yeah, [music] thank you.
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