This dialogue offers a nuanced look at the psychological cost of assimilation and the profound clarity found in reclaiming a suppressed heritage. It effectively bridges personal narrative with the broader sociological complexities of navigating a dual cultural identity.
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Deep Dive
The Truth About Growing Up Half-Filipino in SwedenAdded:
They're more open here, social and spontaneous, and it feels more alive to be here just because of the the people.
And also maybe the lifestyle, you know, you don't have a you can like sing karaoke in the middle of the night here and no one would like ask why.
>> Meet my new friend, Linda. Linda grew up in Sweden with a Swedish father and a Filipino mother. A few months ago, she made the decision to move to the Philippines to reconnect with her heritage and now resides in the province of Lee. Linda makes videos to document her new life in the Philippines, so make sure to check them out, links below. We had a very interesting conversation about what it was like growing up half Filipina in Sweden, her experience living in rural Lee, the differences between Swedish and Filipino culture, and so much more. I hope you guys enjoy the video. You're in the in the province, right?
>> Yeah, I'm in the province right now. I'm in Lee. Uh like Lee Lee. It's like 1 hour from Ormok. Seems like an interesting place. It's very rural, right? In Lee, I can hear the roosters crowing. It sounds pretty rural.
>> Lee is that they speak, don't they?
>> Exactly. So, that's like another language for me, too. I mean, I've been thinking, should I learn Tagalog or Bisayas? But I think it's better to learn like Tagalog because they speak Tagalog like not only here, but also in the rest of the Philippines.
>> Sure. Yeah. It's a little bit easier to connect with everybody, right?
>> Yeah. Are you um half Filipina?
>> Yeah, I'm half Filipina. I grew up in Sweden and now I feel like I have the opportunity to like reconnect with my family here.
>> So, is it um on your mom's side or your dad's side that's Filipino?
>> My mom's side.
>> Ah, okay. And so, did you grow up with your with your mom in Sweden?
>> I did, but I think when I grew up, it was more like I wanted to fit in in Sweden. And so, I like pushed that side of me away. And now I I do regret it because I think it's an important thing for me to do like to reconnect and get to know this side of my of myself.
>> Yeah, that seems to be something that comes later in life, you know. Um, as kids, all of us want to fit in with our classmates and we don't want to be different, right, than anybody else.
>> And then when you get older, you start to see the benefit of, you know, kind of rekindling your heritage and understanding different cultures and languages and stuff.
>> Yeah. I was so grateful for being able to do this and also to had like two cultures before I was like no I I don't want to speak because my mother she tried to like speak Tagalog with us but me and my sister we weren't really didn't wanted to learn. I don't know why but I think we wanted to fit in.
>> Okay, I'll be honest. Learning to speak Talog is pretty hard but with the right resources it can be a whole lot easier.
And I've got you covered with my beginners Tagalog course. With 18 comprehensive video lessons, this two volume course makes it simple to start building your Tagalog skills from the ground up. Plus, you'll get lifetime access to PDF vocabulary sheets that will help you practice and retain what you learn. If that sounds good, click the first link in the description below to start learning Tagalog today. Now, back to the video. So, like what was the culture like at home? Like you had your Filipino mom, but your dad is Swedish, right? Did you guys eat Filipino food growing up? Did you watch any like Filipino TV shows or was it pretty Swedish?
>> Uh, I think it was British Swedish. Uh, we did eat um some Filipino food, but mostly it was Swedish.
>> And what language did you use with your mom then? Did she did you did she learn to speak Swedish or did you speak English with her?
>> Uh, she speak Swedish. So, and Swedish is one of the most like difficult languages to learn. She I think she lived there for she'd been there for almost 30 years.
>> Oh, wow.
>> That's a long time.
>> That's a long time. She came when she was 19.
>> So, do you think it was um difficult for her to adjust to life in Sweden when she moved there?
>> Yeah. Yeah. When when you were when I was little, I didn't really think about that kind of stuff. It was more like ah she don't know how to say this word or something like that and your friends could laugh at her because she didn't really speak Swedish that good but I would never in my life like I mean if I I'm I'm I'm trying to like get in her shoes and if I were the one to go to Sweden and learn the language and the culture and everything it's hard it's really hard. So I appreciate everything that she've done for us because she's very family or oriented. Yeah. And so many Filipinos make that sacrifice, right, of moving to another country. Um, even if they don't have a connection there, they might do that just to earn money and send it back home to their family in the Philippines. I mean, that's how my connection started with the culture here in Canada, right? It was through, you know, of coming from the Philippines to work here in Canada.
But yeah, it's not an easy life adapting to a brand new place and and in many cases learning a new language. What was it like growing up in Sweden as someone who's half Filipina? Did people treat you differently because of that or not really?
>> They did. I think when I grew up there weren't a lot of like mixed people like me. I was the only one in my class. So they did like compare me to people in Asia. And so I didn't really feel Swedish or Swedish. That made me like insecure of myself like where do I belong? And I think that is an important thing for you to feel like you belong somewhere when you grow up or like in life in general. And when I came to the Philippines, I was not Filipina. I was like mystisa. They call me mystisa. So here it was also like I didn't feel at home here either because of that. Yeah.
So I think I struggled a lot with myself growing up. So that's why I also want to like reconnect with this part of myself.
>> And how long have you been living in the Philippines now? since January.
>> Five months.
>> Yeah.
>> And is that is this the longest uh trip in the Philippines that you've had so far?
>> Yeah, we usually go when I was little like every second year for 1 month, but that was about it. And also when you we didn't uh like we stayed here in the province for like 1 week so that my mother can like meet her family and stuff but as a kid not really much you can do here out in the province and I couldn't speak with my like cousins and one thing is that you have this restlessness in your body you know in Sweden where I come from I I felt a bit overworked so I had like I felt I needed a strange. So, but I think it was the restlessness in me wanting something like new and when you come here and this life in the Philippines is more it's like more slow. The pace is more slow here. So, that triggers a lot of the restlessness in me. But I think it's it's good because uh I I wanted to like find this inner peace also.
>> Yeah. Being able to just chill and relax in the province a little bit. You said that when when you were growing up, you had a bit of a of an identity crisis where you didn't necessarily feel like you were fully accepted in Sweden or in the Philippines. Is that a part of your desire to reconnect with your heritage now to kind of figure out your cultural identity?
>> Yeah, I think so. But also, I think I'm pretty stable in who I am now. I do like the fact that I have two cultures and it's interesting for me to also get to know the this part of my culture that I didn't like fully grow up with before because I think that I yeah as I said I pushed it away a bit when I grew up because I didn't want to like be different from the rest of uh friends and >> moving from Sweden and now living in the province in the Philippines for the last 5 months. How has that transition been?
Is it taking a lot to adapt to life there? Is there any culture shock for you? How is that all going?
>> It's definitely a culture shock. I I've been here since I was little. I think that we now live like more luxurious because we have air con. We didn't have that before.
And also, you know, the heat, the climate change, and not being able to like go and buy things like you did in Sweden. like I had this store just right next to my house, things like that. The traffic is also something that that I'm not used to. It's more structured in Sweden. It's uh but here it's more spontaneous. It's more alive, you know, there are it's more like community based. So, that's something I I like.
>> And when you say traffic, you mean like the way people drive and follow the rules or something? Yeah. Because I would imagine that Lee probably doesn't have that much like traffic congestion.
No, >> not like Manila or something.
>> No, because I' I've been in Cebu and the traffic there is like I don't know how to explain it, but >> pretty crazy.
>> Yeah, it's pretty crazy. It's not like I'm standing waiting for the green, you know, the green light that never comes.
You just have to like go out and see what happens.
>> Take it into your own hands and just go.
>> Yeah, exactly. Just trust yourself.
>> Uh-huh. So, do you drive there?
>> No, I don't.
>> Yeah, it seems intimidating. When we were in the Philippines a couple of years ago, uh we thought about maybe renting a car and driving from Manila down to Cavete. And then at the last minute, we were kind of like, ah, let's just like get a a grab or something. We kind of chickenened out. Honestly, I don't know if I would have been able to handle the driving in the city, especially because it was a short trip, so I didn't really have enough time to get used to it. But yeah, it feels pretty intimidating. So, do you live with your family in Lee then?
>> Yeah, I do. My mother's sister, she has a house just right next to ours because we built the house on on their land. So, I'm staying in the house that we built and they're just right next to us. So, it feels comfortable. Yeah.
>> Do you see yourself staying there like full-time now, like permanently?
>> Uh, I would like to, but for now, I'm just taking like step by step, day by day. I would need some kind of like income because now I'm studying business remote. I'm grateful for being able to do that to do that. So, because in Sweden you have like this financial support for studying. So, that's how I'm getting around right now.
>> Right. It's like u free tuition for universities, right?
>> Yeah.
>> That's super nice. I wish we had that here in Canada. I have like student loans and stuff which I mean it's nice that we have the ability to get student loans. There are countries that don't have that but I wish it was free like you guys.
I'm jealous.
>> So, I'm very grateful. Yeah, that's a good system. I mean, I would imagine that your life now living in the province is pretty different than where you moved from in Sweden. What are kind of like the biggest differences you think in your let's say like your lifestyle now?
>> I think that my lifestyle in Sweden it was as I said I was a bit overworked. I do however like uh the job that I'm working at. I wasn't sickly for like 6 months because my neck and my back. Uh, and that's when I started to feel like I felt stuck in Sweden. So, I needed that change. And also, I've always wanted to become like a farmer, but in Sweden it felt like more difficult to achieve like something like that. So, but here in the province, you know, we already have like chickens and other animals, so it felt more natural to start here and also to reconnect with my family.
>> That's cool. So, in Sweden, you guys lived in a city. It's not not quite the city, but you know, a bit outside from the city.
>> Mhm. Like a town or something.
>> Exactly.
>> Not as rurally as you're living now in the Philippines.
>> No.
>> Mhm. I grew up on an acreage here in Canada and um we had all kinds of animals, chickens and miniature donkeys and we had sheep and uh a horse and all kinds of stuff. Uh what do you like about living on the farm?
>> Uh you know, I like the the peace and quiet. I mean, the animals can be quite chaotic sometimes, >> like the roosters.
>> Yeah, the roosters. Always the roosters >> as I hear them in the background.
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And also, I think that my life in Sweden, I could never have like a farm because I'm also allergic to animals.
>> Oh, okay.
>> That makes it more complicated.
>> Yeah. I' I've always liked animals, but here it's more open. The dogs are not inside. The cats are not inside in the house. they're always outside, so it makes it more it's better for for my health.
>> How do you think like the average Swedish person compares to the average Filipino person? Like what are some cultural differences between how people act or interact with each other or >> I think here they are more like it feels more alive here because they're more spontaneous. They are more open. Uh when you go out there, they they all say like hi and want to talk to you, but in Sweden it's more like if I don't say hi to the people I meet, they won't say hi.
Swedish people are a little bit more reserved.
>> Yeah, they're more reserved. Yeah.
>> And which which one do you prefer? Do you prefer to have some space to yourself or do you prefer to talk with everybody?
>> Uh right now I just want to talk to everybody.
>> So you're in the right place.
>> Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I am. Yeah, because I've I've heard that there's kind of a stereotype about Swedish people that they uh are a little bit nervous to, you know, talk to people in, you know, that they don't know or like, you know, be too boisterous in public places. Like I I saw this video talking about how everyone's like scared to make eye contact with people on the bus or whatever. I don't know if >> Yeah. Yeah. It's true. It's true. And you know, on the bus you take a seat, but you never take the seat next to someone else. You always take the seat if it's empty like you know the row. So you can see like uh if you're on a bus you can see that everyone is sitting by themselves but here it's like I was on the bus I was going to Armok and it was just this guy who came up to me and wanted to talk like oh where are you from? And you know that would never happen in in Sweden.
>> I mean do you feel like being in the Philippines is kind of like changing the way that you act? Is it changing your personality as well or or maybe reconnecting with that Filipina side? I definitely feel more open here. I can be more like who I want to be. Like I can if they say hi, I talk to them. It's I don't have to rethink if oh should I say hi or something. I think that growing up also made me quite insecure socially like I didn't know how to should I say something or whatever. But here it comes more naturally to just you know talk and be more social.
>> Yeah. It's easier to talk to somebody if the other person is kind of receiving you in a positive way.
>> Especially when you're a bit insecure growing up like uh I don't know if I'm should I say something or but here it's more like if I don't say something it's it would be more like weird.
>> Sure. Yeah.
>> But why are you so shy? They're not shy here.
>> Yeah. maybe makes you um get out of your head a little bit and not worry about like am I saying the wrong thing or I don't want to sound silly or you know they Filipinos kind of make everything okay like they kind of have a very open culture in my experience that just everything is okay everything is fair game like just be yourself I think it's a beautiful thing >> and I feel also like my cousins here they are very supportive of the things that you do like nothing's wrong to do here it's like oh you want to do that yeah So go ahead. You can try. And >> are there other like people from other countries in Lee or It doesn't strike me as a super international place, but >> No, I I I mean I have my friend here from Sweden who wanted to try the province life also. But as I said, it's not for everyone to like be here because if you're used to like the city life and that everything is happening so fast, you get triggered by being here because the life here is more like it's it's a slow pace.
>> Um, have you spent some time in the cities as well? You mentioned that you were in Cebu at one point.
>> Yeah, for now I think that I'm so I'm so into this lifestyle that the city life makes me more stressed. like I just want to go back to the province and stay there with my chickens.
>> The next time that I go to the Philippines, that's something that I really want to explore as well is like kind of the more rural life. I mean, like I said, I, you know, grew up on an acreage, a little farm as well. And so, you know, I am used to that kind of lifestyle, but I feel like it's unique in the Philippines because, you know, rural can mean very rural. Like in your case, for example, you're really, you know, really out there. And that sounds very intriguing to me. Uh I also think that life is maybe a little bit more authentic for people like that versus if you're in the city. I mean, yeah, it's the Philippines, but like if you're in like BGC and Manila, you could almost be anywhere in the world, you know? Like there's something that's nice about that. I'm not saying it's a bad place to be, but like it's not unique. Like it could be Toronto or Stockholm or London or whatever. And so I think the pro the provincial lifestyle has a charm to it that I would really love to explore. And so maybe on my next trip I'll go to Lee or something. If I should come >> if I went there, what should I do?
What's like a good thing to to do?
>> Well, I think you should like the thing here is you should never take anything for granted like the place it's such is so so beautiful here. Uh you should just try and take a walk and see the mountains. And >> is that the the the most beautiful nature there? Is it mountains? Are there beaches as well or what kind of stuff are is there? There are beaches, but you have to go for like half an hour from here. But the mountains for sure, they're very beautiful here. Yeah.
>> So, do you go like hiking or something like that? Are there any lookouts you can see?
>> Uh, I would like to go hiking someday, but I'm still a bit afraid of like cobras.
>> Are there cobras?
>> Yeah, there are. There are cobras mostly like out in the rice fields here.
>> Oh, so you got to watch out for that.
That's something to think about, I guess. We don't really have too many venomous snakes in Canada. I can't really think of any. I've never seen one here.
>> No, I haven't seen one either, but I mean I don't want to see one, so that's why I'm sure >> staying here.
>> Uh-huh. What about the um the food there? Living proincially, I would imagine you're eating a lot of Filipino food. What's your experience with the food like?
>> My experience is that we eat a lot of fresh like fresh vegetables every day in every meal. We eat a lot of goulai compared to Sweden where I only ate minced beef and rice every day. So, I think it's more balanced here. I mean, you could probably eat more like unhealthy food here also. But for me, it's more it's always like I feel it's more healthy here, more balanced than fresh, >> I guess. Especially if you're kind of in the province too, you'd have, you know, access to fruits and and vegetables and maybe even meat and stuff from like local farms, I would imagine. You said that when you were growing up in Sweden, you ate some Filipino food at home. So you had you were somewhat familiar with it.
>> Adobo. That's also my favorite. And also we eat a lot of pinakbet here. It's like a vegetable vegetable soup.
>> That's um like an ilocano dish, right?
Is it pumpkin or squash or something like that?
>> Yeah, it's pumpkin. And we also do eat a lot of or I do eat a lot of tuna. I love tuna. So here you can get tuna. Like I I think I bought like 2 kilos of tuna for almost 2,000 pesos. But in Sweden, if I would would have get like tuna there, it would cost me like 400 pesos, I think, for only 100 g.
>> Oh, wow.
>> I do love the food here.
>> It's It's fresh food. It's accessible.
And it's cheaper coming from Sweden. So, that sounds like a win-winwin.
>> Yeah.
>> Hard to lose. I mean, is is there is there anything that you don't like about being in the Philippines? I think it's just that I'm not used to some things like if you're cooking food or doing something with food, you should always like put it away. You can't like leave bread or something outside because of the ants.
>> Oh, >> and that's something I'm not used to.
And also, I'm I'm not used to, you know, in Sweden you are uh you can have like warm water when you take a shower, but here you have this scoop. It's >> Oh, really? Yeah.
>> Wow. So, it's like a a super lowkey shower.
>> Yeah. But it's it's always nice because when it's warm outside, you always want like a cold shower after.
>> I think in Tagalog they call that patiggo, which is like >> Oh, yeah.
>> Yeah. Yeah. Ducks bath or whatever.
>> That would be quite a change. That's that's different. I mean, there's there's there are changes that come from, you know, just being in a new country, like cultural things, like the way people talk to each other and whatever. And then there's also differences of like living very rurally versus living in a city or living in uh you know a wealthy country versus living in a developing country. And for you it sounds like you have all of those changes, right? It sounds very very different. Um but you're you're adjusting to it. You feel comfortable there now?
>> Yeah, I do. And also, I mean, I've been here since I was little, so I could always imagine how it would be before, but I think now it's much better than before because before we lived like in in this bamboo house. Now it's like uh concrete and we do have like uh air con, all the necessities like we have a fridge, but then we didn't have things like that. So, it was much harder before than it is now.
>> So, you've had some experience. You've gotten used to it over the years going there as a kid, even for a little while.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. I mean, no fridge, no air con. I mean, that's that's hard, especially in a tropical country.
>> And you take it for granted, like now I don't need that. And but then when you're here, it's like it's kind of hot.
I wouldn't like to go inside air con room.
>> Yeah. I mean, coming from a cold climate, I mean, like I'm I'm assuming that in Sweden, not a lot of people have air con either, right? Like just generally, you don't need it. And in Canada, you don't need it either. And so, uh, yeah, we definitely take that for granted, like never being too warm or whatever. Um, but even just like all of the stuff you're talking about, like infrastructure and, you know, like if you're in a wealthy country, you just you're you're given things that a lot of other people in the world don't have, right? Like hot showers and whatever else it might be. Um, and so yeah, we definitely like as people from like the quote unquote West, we like definitely take those things for granted. I know I did. Uh, and then going to other countries, I was like, "Oh my god." Like I I have so much stuff that like the majority of the world doesn't have.
>> Yeah.
>> Really, it's crazy. I have a lot of respect for people that live like that, you know?
>> And somehow I could feel like I wanted to give something back to the family that I have here because I grew up like in Sweden, you know, compare it that I had it better growing up in Sweden than they did. So part of me is like I wanted to give back something, maybe give them something better. I mean that's also like the motivation I think for Filipinos to go abroad, right? A lot of times is to uh improve the kind of uh material condition of their family, improve improve the life that they have back home. Yeah, it's it's very very commendable how Filipinos do that. You know, your mom included, right, Lee?
Yeah, it sounds like an interesting province. Now, there's a lot of um kind of islands in the area, too, right? It's close to Samar, is that right?
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. Have you been around to any of those other surrounding areas?
>> Uh, I think I've been when I was little.
I don't remember. I just recognized the Samar and Biran. And also there's a small like island beach that's called Kalangaman. Kalangaman. I would like to visit that beach also. I think Samar. We went there when I was little. So I don't really remember it. But now when I live here, I want to explore more of the areas around here. So, >> is it pretty accessible from where you are to take a boat to the other islands?
>> Yeah, it is. It's just, you know, you have to plan the trip from Lee to wherever you want to go, but usually we would hire like a driver from here.
>> So, you're you're Lee. Lee, is that like the biggest city in the province?
>> I think No, maybe Lee is one of the biggest like it's more in the middle.
You have oral, you have the globan, but then it's like lee and then lee >> like a little >> that's like the capital maybe.
>> Yeah, >> we've probably already gone over some of these things, but like generally speaking, what's your favorite thing about Filipino culture? They're more open here, social and spontaneous and it feels more alive to be here just because of the the people and also maybe the lifestyle, you know, you don't have a you can like sing karaoke in the middle of the night here and no one would like ask why. But in if if I compare it to Sweden, you know, the police would be there like what are you doing? Why is it so loud? Uh that's something that I I do like about being here and it's always it feels very welcoming to be here and where I'm from like here in the province you do know each other each other's family so it could always be like oh so you are you're from that family and I yeah so it feels comfortable yeah to know that.
>> How much of that stuff did you already know before you moved there in January?
Like how much exposure did you have to that side of the Philippines? I did have a lot of like I went here since I was little every second year but then growing up I think I was around when I was 14 we didn't go as much and then I had to pay for my own ticket so when I was little but I don't think that I I didn't really like take it all in when I was little. It was more like when I was here, you just wanted to find something to do and you know cuz you were le restless and you wanted to go to the beach or go like swimming in a pool or I'd rather be like in a hotel than to be here because there was nothing to do here besides if you if they had like kittens or puppies I can be with it.
>> Yeah. I guess you have a different experience as a kid, right? Cuz you're just kind of focused on, you know, doing fun stuff or whatever. Um, >> as an adult, you have a maybe a more nuanced view of the place.
>> Yeah. Yeah. Now I'm more like I want to take that time and read that book and do that kind of things that I didn't want to do when I was little. Like, no, I don't want to read that book. I don't want to take it easy. I don't want to take it chill.
>> Okay, sweet. I think those are pretty much all of the questions that I had for you. Also, I like to end the interviews with some kind of rapid fire questions and so I just give you a couple of options and then you choose one of them and it's all related to like Filipino culture and Filipino food and stuff like that. Is that okay? Can we do that?
Okay, sweet. This is the first question.
You ready?
>> Yeah.
>> What do you prefer? Uh jeepy or trike?
>> Trike.
>> City or province?
>> Province.
>> That one is kind of obvious, isn't it?
>> Yeah.
>> Beer or gin?
>> Beer.
>> Now, uh vodka is really big in uh Sweden, isn't it? Absolute vodka. So, what about what about beer or vodka?
Which one do you prefer then? Does that change it?
>> Vodka.
>> Vodka.
>> I knew that would change it.
>> Karaoke or basketball?
>> Karaoke.
>> Uh, halo halo or leche flan?
>> Leche flan.
>> Beach or mountains?
>> Beach.
>> Rainy season or summer in the Philippines?
>> Ah, summer.
>> OPM original Pinoy music or K-pop?
>> K-pop.
>> Adobo or sinigang?
>> Oh, >> your two favorites, right? Yeah. Okay.
Sineag.
>> Panset or Lubia?
>> Lubia.
>> Jollibee or McDonald's?
>> Jollibee.
>> Borakai or Palawan? Have you been to those places?
>> To both. Uh, Palawan.
>> Do you prefer Western food or Filipino food?
>> Ooh, for now, Filipino food.
>> Okay, sweet. Those are all the questions that I had. Thank you.
>> Thank you.
Heat. Heat.
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