The Performative Male Epidemic is Getting Worse

[00:00:00]Today we are going to be talking about performative males. Go ahead and order your matcha. This week we had our assistant research the most insane performative males out there. We don't know nothing. We might as well have amnesia. Today me, Ethan, and you are going to figure out how these specific performative males landed them on the list of the worst performative males of all time. And uh my assistant told me if you uh if you cringe easily, you probably shouldn't watch till the end of this video. Let's get into it.

[00:00:32]There have been many maledominated trends and memes over the years, including the chill guy meme, the men and female fields trend, and most recently looks maxing. But in today's video, we're going to take a deep dive into the trend of performative males.

[00:00:49]Are performative males just a funny, light-hearted internet trend? Or do they represent something much more sinister?

[00:00:55]How have performative males impacted today's society? And most importantly, what truly constitutes a performative male? Well, buckle up because this video is going to answer all of your most pressing performative male questions.

[00:01:08]Now, before we start, Bella, who did all the research for this video, uh, apparently got us something. Bella is not here right now, but we we have been ordered to to call my girlfriend and she's going to deliver whatever this object is to us right now. We have no idea. So, I don't know if I'm supposed to like hold this the whole video or I don't even know. This might completely ruin the vibes.

[00:01:30]>> Ready?

[00:01:31]>> Can you bring us the package?

[00:01:33]>> Yes.

[00:01:36]>> What? [laughter] Bro, you're off it. What?

[00:01:41]Dry out of riffs. I sorry, man. L riff.

[00:01:48]Oh god. Oh my [ __ ] Oh god. Oh my god.

[00:01:53]Oh my god.

[00:01:56]Matcha. What the [ __ ] I've ne I've literally never had matcha before. I've never had matcha, but I don't know. I'm holding in my hand. It just It just feels right. I can feel myself transforming.

[00:02:10]Get rid of [gasps] I'm I'm I'm doing bad. I was going to say something about periods. Do it.

[00:02:18][screaming] GIVE ME YOUR PERIOD, BABE. ALL RIGHT.

[00:02:21]WELL, I I guess we're going to be sipping on matcha this video. Let's do that taste test.

[00:02:25]>> All right. Have you ever had matcha before?

[00:02:27]>> No. All right. Let's Let's sip. Three, two, one. [groaning] It tastes like a mint.

[00:02:38]Yeah. Yeah. But it kind of tricks you.

[00:02:40]It's like at first it tastes good and then it just progressively the aftertaste it just gets more and more ass. It's like your brain is getting tricked for like half a second into thinking it's like sugar or something and then it's like nah broccoli. What the [ __ ] is this [ __ ] bro? I mean I know I know that the recipe is right on the screen, but like it's just a vibe.

[00:03:01]The performative male is an internet meme that took off in 2025, showcasing an archetype of men that involves performative displays of progressivism, feminism, and emotional sensitivity. In addition to their emotional displays, these performative males tend to drink matcha, carry tote bags with labubu keychains, wear baggie jeans, read books by female authors, and listen to musicians such as Clero Bad Bea with wired headphones. That's That's the one. Like everything. Okay. Like I like be a doobby. Why? Why the baggie jeans?

[00:03:35]Hey, I thought that was just like >> I wear baggie jeans. I like Baobie.

[00:03:40]I'm drinking matcha now. That's like 50% of it. Okay, so the wired headphones is the thing I never never understood. And let's let's fight. Let's fight. If there's anyone watching right now, you use wired headphones, you're [ __ ] stupid. That shit's performative, bro. I mean, everything's wireless now. There's there that. Okay, I will say wireless headphones, one of the best inventions [music] ever. Top 10 inventions of all time. Coming in at number five.

[00:04:08]We got matcha. No, I'm do I'm [ __ ] I'm L riff. Let's get up. Let's get a L riff meter up on Ethan tonight.

[00:04:17]>> This video is sponsored by Jada.

[00:04:20]>> That's one of our Patreon subscribers, so technically they're sponsoring this video. While these are just some examples of the look of a performative male, there are many possibilities and variation among these men. In one urban dictionary definition, it is noted that performative males will often ditch their true selves to put up a facade for their partner 24/7 and that it may lead to strain in their relationships when their partner learns that he was only acting in that manner to get some action, aka some [ __ ] Hey, now I mean it it's the classic. It's the It's the wolf in sheep's clothing tail. It's good method. Good method. If it's quick in-n-out, what did they say? If If you want a [ __ ] dog, you got to learn how to bark. That's a saying. Why Why is it got to start with if you want to a dog?

[00:05:07]I just LIKE WHOA. WHOA.

[00:05:08]>> I don't know, bro. I I just I just heard I didn't come up with it.

[00:05:11]>> Let's Let's back up.

[00:05:12]>> I I didn't come up with that saying. I did not I just heard it. Pun intended. I think that was a dog whistle. Um to be like WF meter. I really need to tell someone I want to a dog. Dude, that's out of contact. Out of context, dude.

[00:05:24]Let's make a saying. So, it's like, you know, if I got that feeling boiling up, this is someone else saying it, by the way. You know, be like, I got to learn how to bark. You know what I'm saying?

[00:05:34]We're moving on. Add that to the We We can't do the L riff meter joke because it includes adding all of Ethan's bad jokes.

[00:05:43]Oh, [laughter] we have this thing where if you mock someone, you automatically lost the argument. [music] We we've we've instated that rule. You just lost. I wasn't even arguing. So, I'm oning fire tonight.

[00:05:58]>> Count that to the sale the self glaze counter.

[00:06:01]>> Self glaze timer.

[00:06:02]>> Self glaze counter. Um, it doesn't count.

[00:06:04]>> Self glaze counter just does not appear on screen. [snorts] In another urban dictionary definition, a user writes that a performative male is a male who can [ __ ] anywhere [music] and at any time. This definition has two down votes. It is not clear whether a performative male wrote these definitions or not. Most commonly seen among these men is their false love of literature. If out in public, a performative male will never be seen without a book. To be specific, performative males will only own female authored books such as The Bale Jar by Sylvia Pla, Normal People by Sally Rooney, or We Should All Be Feminist by CNA. I'm not even I'm not even going to try to pronounce that name cuz I will [ __ ] it up. to mama nada. It is imperative to note that these men do not actually read these books, but rather carry them as an accessory [music] or a talking point for women. Fun fact, you haven't seen it yet. That's how the drama starts. Oh my god. Good ass movie.

[00:07:04]Spoilers. Another accessory that these performative males tend to carry is a laboo. Either attached [music] to their tote bag or their baggie jeans. What is the baggie jean hate? But you know what?

[00:07:15]Maggie jeans. What do we are we supposed to be wearing? Skinny jeans. I used to I used to wear skinny jeans. Put [snorts] a picture up on screen. Everyone called me gay. I don't think it was just the skinny jeans, but you know, a labu is a plush toy that appears as a monster with sharp teeth, large ears, and a scruffy [music] appearance. I don't know if it's going to get into it in this essay, but I know there was a lot of scandal with these things being possibly demonic.

[00:07:39]What? Yeah. Yeah. There was like people cuz you know we're we're from a small town in the south and there was a lot of people posting on their story. Laboo.

[00:07:48]No, labible.

[00:07:51]Gotta get the labible, man. Nah, get rid of these laboo. But how did a children's toy end up becoming a staple wardrobe piece for performative males? Since laboo come in blind boxes, they ended up creating hysteria in labu collectors around the world. An entire study was conducted that investigated the interplay between scarcity cues, individual motivations, and consumer behavior in the context of collectible markers focusing on PopMart's Laboo series. Jesus, that whatever the hell that means. Who named that [ __ ] study? The study, which consisted of 442 labu collectors, found that scarcity cues, i.e. limited series and blind boxes [music] significantly increased fear of missing out, FOMO, which had a strong impact on a customer's willingness to pay. I need to start finding a way to exploit uh my my audience with the use of FOMO. You have to make references.

[00:08:45]>> I think you're thinking of like hanging out FOMO. I'm talking about >> No, no. Okay, but like Well, I was about to bring up like, oh, you know, when you're playing Jackbox with your like with a new friend group, >> add it to the L rip. I I wasn't all right. Using this evidence, it is likely that performative males either didn't want to have FOMO or they wanted to play into women's FOMO regarding lab boooos.

[00:09:06]They definitely wanted to play into that [ __ ] Yeah, they wanted to. Every performative male is like, "Now, can I harness the the female? I just drink the matcha, the little boo boo." This is a terrible sentence. I'm I'm now realizing. But [ __ ] you, Na. I I don't understand. And I feel like um I mean for for like all eternity [music] women have always liked the bad guy and and I feel like when you're dating a girl or a guy the whole thing is kind of that they're different.

[00:09:39]So when you're a guy I I don't understand the thought process. I mean does it work ladies? Does it work? Have you ever let a performative male hit?

[00:09:46]And if you have, [laughter] this is like a generational run.

[00:09:56]Add it to the L riff counter. I It wasn't even a riff. I didn't I didn't riff. So, you But why Laboo specifically? There are some conspiracies that laboo are linked to the ancient Mesopotamia demon Pazuzu, primarily due to its sharp tooth grin and eerie [music] aesthetic. They just found the first that rhymes with Lubu and they're like, "This is the demon, bro." They went on rhymes on the Boooo.

[00:10:19]Pazuzu. I got me a boo boo. I think I'm related to Pazuzu. I can't afford Hulu.

[00:10:24]I'm so crazy. I go cuckoo. I'm this. I'm the dudoo. Laboos may be related to doodoo. In Iraq, authorities even seized over 4,000 Laboos and imposed a ban alleging that the toy could influence children's behavior and attract demonic spirits. on Tik Tok and Reddit. These theories gain sign. Dude, people on Tik Tok are just idiots. Like the conspiracy theories I see like like the Kanye clone [ __ ] People on Tik Tok believe in that [ __ ] Dude, Tik Tok will drum up some [ __ ] and just just spit it out. Flat Earth thing is like kind of made a comeback because of Tik Tok cuz it's just I mean all it takes is one comment.

[00:11:04]They're like I don't know. Looks flat.

[00:11:06]You know, I'll tell you what it is. It's that one song that what?

[00:11:15]Hold on. I bet if I go on TikTok and just look up conspiracy, this [ __ ] alone raised schizophrenia in the United States.

[00:11:27]Wait, [music] why do I kind of Why do I kind of believe in that Laboo is actually Pizuzu now? Pizuzu? Wait, why do I actually kind of now believe in Pizuzu, father of Labubu? Pizuzu, we sacrifice Ethan to you. Hey, whoa, yeah.

[00:11:50]Whoa, whoa, hold on. Leave a comment if you want to sacrifice Ethan to Mesopotamian god Pizuzu. On Tik Tok and Reddit, these theories gained significant popularity with users claiming that they had supernatural experiences because of their laboos.

[00:12:04]Maybe performative males carry labus with them simply because of their demonic nature. That that's kind I mean that's kind of true. What? So are they supposed to be like voodoo dolls now?

[00:12:12]Laboo. Voodoo. One of the most famous performative males is Paul Mezcow, an Irish actor who became famous for his role as Connell Waldron in the TV adaptation of Sally Rooney's Normal People. Mezcow has become famous on TikTok for being the OG performative male. Mezcow has become known among his fans for being emotionally vulnerable and engaging in positive masculinity.

[00:12:38]Positive masculinity. Just say you're gay, bro. If your masculinity isn't toxic, you're probably just gay. What are you talking about? Your feelings.

[00:12:49]Real men hold it all in until the end of their lives, go into the farm, blow their brains out with a shotgun. While most performative males garner hate online, Mezcow's audience is extremely positive towards him. In one viral Tik Tok video, Paul Mezcow is seen sharing cheek kisses with Pedro Pascal. Gay.

[00:13:07]Gay. Ring the gay alarm. You know he's a boy, right?

[00:13:12]The public reaction to this video was inspiring with users commenting things like they're so cute. I think we may have missed the mark a little. The comments are going to be with us on We want you to be able to express love like this. And even I need two boyfriends that will be each other's boyfriends, too. What? Like girls are saying that I need two boyfriends that would be each other's boyfriend? I've always wondered this. Okay, so guys are always like two girls kissing. Yeah. Yeah. But are are are girls like that about guys?

[00:13:43]I guess heated rivalry is pretty big with women.

[00:13:45]>> Still [ __ ] gay though. Other way around's pretty cool. I don't These reactions are exactly why men engage in performative male behavior to appear different and feminine to women. All in hopes of simply getting laid. Once women understood that performative males were only pretending to be feminist, they became frustrated. Not me, though. I support women, man. I'm not. I am a feminist. I love [ __ ] I love women, bro. I love women. Girls are so hot. I am a feminist. In the article, maybe the real performative male is the friends we made along the way, Saporio West explains [music] that at some point the performative male served as a channel for women to express their frustrations with men. But instead of creating a safe place for women, these performative males only further spread misogyny. West further explains that as a political satire, the performative male fails spectacularly because satire requires critique. And because of the laughability and virality of the trend, the performative males have failed to be critiqued. I mean, is the fact them like being a viral meme, not them being critiqued, though?

[00:14:56]>> Yeah, I think uh this article is wrong because uh they've been [ __ ] on for the past year. L article, delete that [ __ ] trash. No.

[00:15:10]Wes leaves her article with one final note. An irony pill, self-aware urban male who engages in casual [music] sexism is nothing groundbreaking. And if you replace Clero with the national, replace macho with arteisal coffee and keep the ironic mustache. The performative male is simply a sexist hipster from the 2000s. Kind of kind of got him. I'm not going to lie.

[00:15:31]>> Yeah. In his article, Jeremy Mohler details his life as a performative male or what he says is the same thing as a [music] nice guy. I don't I don't think it's the same thing. I think a nice guy um a nice guy isn't going to try and manipulate a woman. God forbid. They would never do that. Mhler explains that the performative male carries a tote bag, wears graphic tees. Okay. What the f? They're always the performing male carries a tote bag, wears graphic tees, drinks matcha, and reads feminist books. The nice guy people pleases. Doesn't communicate his needs, but still expects people to meet them and avoids conflict. Okay, that's pretty that's pretty good explanation of the nice guy. When you hold the door for a girl and she doesn't [ __ ] you. Huh?

[00:16:15]What the [ __ ] Uh, why was I even being nice in the first place? Mhler notes that in his life he sees himself as an a yikes. Mhler notes that in his life he sees himself as a nice guy [music] because he aims to avoid conflict. I don't know what that's just I'm one of the nice guys actually. I'm not going to beg for [ __ ] But I thought we thought he just clocked nice guys and then he was like I'm actually a nice guy and it it was friendly fire. That's [ __ ] up.

[00:16:45]You can't be hating on other nice guys.

[00:16:47]I'm one of the good nice guys. I'm nicer. Mhler thinks that nice guys and performative males are simply reacting to decades of feminism and women gaining more power in the home and out in the world. Mhler explains that men are tired of listening to women tell stories of being catc calledled and discriminated against. So these performative males are zigging where other men zag. We want the women we're attracted to to know we're not like those other guys.

[00:17:14]So really, these performative males are showing their support for women, not their lack thereof. I guess I guess he was dead on when he said he was a nice guy. So I'm a nice guy. We're performing. We're putting on a show for you. What's so bad about that? I'm not like these performative males who will just [ __ ] you and leave. No, he's not even saying he's saying that performative males are not like other guys. This is like the spokes person.

[00:17:37]He's like, we we're performing to to separate ourselves. WE'RE NOT LIKE THE OTHER GUYS. THEY NOT LIKE US.

[00:17:45]ADDITIONALLY, because they aim to please women, nice guys end up depriving themselves of their own needs until they simply can't take it anymore. One user commented on Muller's article and said, "Pretty weird how society started using nice guy as an insult a couple of decades ago, and now women hate men, men hate themselves, and everyone feels lonely.

[00:18:06]She just didn't hate on us nice guys."

[00:18:08]When did nice guy become a [ __ ] slur?

[00:18:11]All right, here's my here's my take on nice guys. The the problem with nice guys is they think, "Oh, I'm nice, so girl must like me." I feel like being nice is just the foundation and you should also be interesting like like hobbies.

[00:18:28]>> What?

[00:18:29]>> Like like nice guys are in the habit of like basically like I spend all of my time worshiping you. Why would you not want that? And it's like, why would a woman want a guy who has nothing else going for them but the girl? But I was nice to her, man. West and Mhler obviously have very opposing views of performative males. While West believes that performative males are negatively impact women and feminism, Muller argues that the public perception of performative males and negatively impacts masculinity [music] and men as a whole. But how does the average woman feel about performative males? Who cares? Uh, they're women.

[00:19:09]What is that fake ass scream on r/ ask feminist? One user asked, "Is the [music] performative male a realworld phenomenon?" One user responded to this post and said she once dated a performative male. [music] He would attend protest, read up on the sex industry, and even gave up porn when he realized [music] that women suffered for it. How noble. I guess I guess I'm going to have to jack off to Yep. I give up. L riff. It happens. It happens. It happens. The commenter notes, however, that when things became more involved, she realized that he was a massive misogynist. The user says that this guy ended up cheating on her with multiple women at the same time. All right. He sounds pretty guy sounds pretty cool. Sounds pretty cool to me. I don't see what he did wrong. He was putting on a good performance. It was working on multiple women. He played the game well. He performed well. I don't know after this this article is is convincing me to become a performative male. She explains that he was so successful in seducing women because he came off as a sensitive left-leaning sciencebelieving thoughtful man. He he believes in science. He's so hot. I'm wet jeans believe in science. Thoughtful thoughtful thoughtful. His phone was full of them thoughts.

[00:20:27]>> [cheering] >> Not only did he cheat on her, but according to the commenter, he ended up stalking her after she ended things, telling her in thousands of emails that who's emailing who, this is a new thing, right? Emails. No. [laughter] Telling her in thousands of emails how awful she was and [music] how great he was because he did things like buy her chocolates and bath bombs when she was on her period. Another user responded to the post saying they were related to a performative male, noting that he actually thinks he's a feminist and progressive. It's just that those ideals don't extend to the women he's dated.

[00:21:02]Additionally, the commenter says women as a nameless, faceless group loves them. Women he sleeps with not so much.

[00:21:09]One time, the commenter's brother even told her that he trains his women like he trains his dogs.

[00:21:15]That's how you got to do it. I don't know, man. I mean the more the like I was hating on performing males but you know that that's kind of a kind of a tough kind of epic misogyny. W quote that was sick. I am against misogyny unless it's epic. Carl lover guy 20 said an example of a performative male is Brian Griffin from Family Guy. In many episodes of Family Guy, Brian portrays himself as this good guy who really cares about women but in reality he only cares about looking good. Brian caught a [ __ ] straight. I was not expecting the cameo, but you know, because of the virality of the performative male trend, university campuses all across the United States began hosting performative male contest.

[00:21:58]According to The Hill, the goal in these competitions is to imitate a man who adopts certain beliefs and interests to attract women with prizes ranging from gift cards to books written by female authors. At UNCC, over 100 students gathered for a performative mail contest hosted by UNCC lookalike events. The contest lasted over an hour with contestants sharing their favorite women such as Charlie XCX to playing Rip Tide by Vance Joy on a ukulele. One contestant said, "I've obviously been a performative man all my life, but after my friends told me about the contest, I saw the competition side to everybody, and I feel like I needed to show my performative side." Well, I mean, it's the perfect environment for them. It's it's it's a competition. You you're going to perform, you know?

[00:22:44]>> Yeah. I mean, yet you are performing.

[00:22:45]It's like, "All right, I'm going to put on the besting show you've ever seen."

[00:22:49]Following the competition, one onlooker, Lily Gray, said, "I've never heard so many men talk about ministration before." At Yale, over 500 students gathered for a different performative mail contest. The contest was separated into three sections, with the second section focusing on a talent show. One participant showcased his controlled method of cigarette smoking. Following the 90inute contest, Marco Jatel was named the victor and given a performative Yale labu. Holy [ __ ] dude.

[00:23:20]This guy's Pizuzu is going to look down with gratefulness on him. Pizuzu will favor you. A laboo that wore a Yale crop t-shirt and a pearl necklace that held a Yale review tote bag [music] and matcha at William and Mary. The performative male victor received a $50 gift card while the contest at Temple University raised money for women against abuse.

[00:23:45]Whole time the performative males are causing the abuse. It's like uh we're raising money for a good cause. It's like we're going to use the money against you. While it is easy to laugh at or with performative males, it is important for us as a society to take a deeper look into the motives behind these performances. Are performative males truly setting back the timeline on feminism or performative males unjustly hated? Should we as a society give performative males a chance to change their ways or should we shun them? I'll let you, the viewers, make the final decision. But regardless, performative males have always existed, just under different names, and they will always continue to exist. The important thing is how we handle their presence going forward. I'm going to I'm going to join.

[00:24:28]I'm going to become a per performative [snorts] male. The gig don't sound bad, man. Okay. Like you [music] you you play poker, you know, you don't show your cards. You know, if you're a misogynist, why would you say it? It's kind of smart. All right. All [music] I'm taking from this video from this video is I'm just writing down notes. Baggy pants, matcha, wired headphones. Got [music] it. Got it.

[00:24:52]It's starting to work on