My Thoughts on Hookup Culture as a Woman in This Generation

追加: 2026-05-17

[00:00:00]So, there is this weird pressure in our generation nowadays to act like nothing affects us anymore. Like, you're too attached if you care. You are too insecure if you want something real. And you are weak if you have been intimate with someone and then you have feelings for this person or you care deeply for them.

[00:00:22]This is how we live nowadays.

[00:00:26]And maybe hookup culture is fine for some people.

[00:00:31]Sure, whatever. You do you. But I am tired of pretending like women secretly love being emotionally detached and constantly feeling replaced and calling confusion freedom.

[00:00:47]That is not freedom and you know it deep down. You are just trying to convince yourself that you feel good because that is the new cool. That is the new norm.

[00:00:57]That That is the new trend that is going on.

[00:01:00]But that is not how you feel deep down.

[00:01:02]I truly I truly can't believe that.

[00:01:06]Because deep down, I feel like women because I'm speaking from a women's perspective or even Yeah, men, whatever. I feel like humans we want deep down a a deep connection. We aren't unbothered.

[00:01:22]We care. We want something real. But everyone is saying, "Just hook up. Do whatever. It doesn't matter.

[00:01:31]It's so much more fun. It's easier. It It isn't a lot of work."

[00:01:36]But I truly truly believe that they are just scared.

[00:01:41]They are just scared to admit that they want something real.

[00:01:47]That they want a real true connection.

[00:01:52]But they are just pretending that they don't care. That No, that is absolutely not how it is. I am completely unbothered and I don't care.

[00:02:02]And nobody talks enough about how exhausting it is trying to protect your heart.

[00:02:09]Because it feels like no one can trust anyone these days.

[00:02:13]No one can trust anyone.

[00:02:16]Everyone just want to hook up. Everyone just want to use everyone and I am simply tired of it.

[00:02:23]I am a person who I don't hook hook up with people. I don't.

[00:02:29]I have my heart on my sleeve and I am not saying this to hype myself up. I'm just saying my experience in this world.

[00:02:37]How I see it. I just look at people and I see scared people. People are scared to commit. People are scared to say what they are feeling. And that is that is because they are scared of being rejected, of being lied to, of being looked upon as weak or yeah, just like someone who does not fit in in this generation because this generation is glorifying and hyping people up who don't care and who maybe yeah, are using people or or they are even hyping up yeah, women hating men, men hating women. But that is just because >> [sighs] >> so many have been betrayed.

[00:03:21]Many are being betrayed by yeah, by people because when you go on apps, when you tell people your intentions, people are like yeah, good luck with that or should you really be doing that? Should you really be looking for something serious? You're so young, blah blah blah. It does not matter your age. What do you mean? If people want a true connection which we all want. We are human beings.

[00:03:48]We're searching for something real. We want to feel seen, heard, valued, respected. We want that connection. We want someone that we can trust, that we know that okay, this person, they got my back.

[00:04:03]I know that when they are going out, whatever, I know that they are thinking about me, that they are valuing me.

[00:04:11]Now we are walking around scared that people are yeah, lying, cheating because it's so common. It's so common. And it's going around trends like cheat on women, if women, and women are secretly cheat whatever.

[00:04:31]That is not okay. I'm not speaking about that in a in a positive manner. Of course, it is not okay, but we should not glorify cheating. We should not glorify not caring. Everyone cares.

[00:04:45]Everyone wants love, but everyone is just scared of new love because of old pain.

[00:04:55]I just feel like people they they can't trust anyone anymore.

[00:04:59]And it's sad. It's sad.

[00:05:02]And it's really hard to find someone who wants a true connection. It is like you are walking outside and then you suddenly find a I don't know, money on the ground and you're like, what? And it's a lot of money. And you're like, wow, it's a prank. This this can't be happening.

[00:05:21]But you have found you know, money. So what I'm saying is that when someone wants something real, it's like, you're joking. You're joking.

[00:05:31]You're just going to use me.

[00:05:34]That is the mentality that we have nowadays.

[00:05:37]People feel like it's a waste. People are like, why should I have a relationship? Why?

[00:05:42]What what is it that is going to benefit me.

[00:05:49]But now we have this this generation full of people feeling extremely lonely, feeling extremely lost, feeling like we can't relate to each other anymore. But that is because no one actually wants to do the work.

[00:06:05]Everyone is lonely, but everyone is preaching about if everyone you should not care, you should be cold.

[00:06:13]It is not cool to be cold. It is not it is not admirable to be to be yes, don't care, have no feelings, be hard, be stand-offish. That is not cool at all at all. You think that you will get respect that way? You think that you will get a relationship that way? You think that you will attract people that way if you're aggressive, if you're stand-offish, if you just don't bother with people anymore.

[00:06:43]That is not how you get someone.

[00:06:47]You get someone, I truly believe this. I you get someone if you are authentic, if you say your intentions straight on, and if you actually say, "Okay, listen.

[00:06:58]These are my struggles.

[00:07:01]I struggle with trusting people.

[00:07:05]I struggle because my intentions is that I want something real.

[00:07:11]Okay?

[00:07:12]So if you say that you want something real, of course they could lie to you, but eventually how long could they lie? They will prove their point.

[00:07:21]And there is also this shame around, "Okay, if you say that you want something real and this person is saying, 'Yeah, I also want something real.' And you maybe are intimate with them, then you're shaming yourself. How could I trust this person? How could I" Do you know what? You went in with the strongest, most pure mentality that you have.

[00:07:43]Do not become hard, weak, or or angry because of people who are lying or using your body.

[00:07:52]You went in with a good intention, okay? And that is all that matters because karma will get them in the end. I truly believe that.

[00:08:03]The universe The universe works in that way.

[00:08:07]And even if you think, "Well, the Now I feel used. Now I feel like an object."

[00:08:10]Because women nowadays feel like an object, okay?

[00:08:16]I am just talking about women's experience here. I am not bashing on men because we women also have issues and we are also doing things that are not great, okay?

[00:08:29]But I am seeing this so clearly. We women, we feel often like we are an object, like we aren't good enough as we are. We feel like if we're not pretty enough, if we are if we don't have makeup, if we don't have this, we we will not attract anyone.

[00:08:45]And then on the other hand, we also feel like we are only attracting men that only cares about our appearance. That is why >> [sighs and gasps] >> That is why it's so important to us to Yeah, to feel like we are respected that someone is choosing us based on our Yeah, values, our thoughts because we are so much more than appearance. And if you think And that is the mentality also that Okay, I want someone who is beautiful. I want someone who is 10 out of 10. You really think You really really think that it will work if your partner if the only only thing that is important it is the looks.

[00:09:29]Is how they are looking.

[00:09:32]Then I want you to truly look at yourself and feel like, "Okay, why is it so important to me for my partner to be stunning? Of course, you should be attracted to your partner. That is not what I'm saying.

[00:09:46]But if that is the only thing that is important to you, who are you doing that for? Are you truly dating that person for yourself?

[00:09:56]Or are you using them as a trophy?

[00:09:59]Because that is how I feel.

[00:10:01]That is how so many women are feeling.

[00:10:05]We feel like we are just some kind of object. And when you find something better, when you find something more entertaining, we are switched like that.

[00:10:18]We are thrown around like we don't matter anymore.

[00:10:21]So we have a hard time trusting or I I simply do not trust many people.

[00:10:30]Because yeah, as soon as I'm dating someone, I'm like, "Okay, when will be the next time that I will be disappointed?" And that is so sad. That is so sad. And I'm not saying this for you to feel bad for me because it's not bad it's not sad for me. I don't want empathy. No. I'm just telling it how I'm I'm seeing it. That people are just wanting something quick, wanting to hook up, and I just feel like they are extremely scared of commitment.

[00:11:01]People aren't looking in themselves.

[00:11:03]People People always think that the grass is greener on the other side. But it's not. It's not. And if you think that yeah, I can always find someone more beautiful, someone more in my style, someone more I don't know, whatever it that is perfect, that is fitting in my list, then you will never be satisfied.

[00:11:28]Never. Never ever ever. Don't you want someone to to match your personality, that you have fun with, that you find attractive, that you Yeah, you you say you share the same thoughts, values, opinions. You feel safe around this person.

[00:11:48]Isn't that more important?

[00:11:50]Isn't that more important than pleasure itself? You know what I mean?

[00:11:55]Because that pleasure is that quick. And then you are dealing with a human.

[00:12:00]Everyone is so lonely and everyone feels so disconnected, but no one wants to connect.

[00:12:09]>> [snorts] >> I just feel like everyone should be more honest, more honest and not shame one another for what we actually want.

[00:12:18]Because I truly believe that everyone wants a true connection. But everyone also feels like it's impossible, because everyone is playing these games.

[00:12:30]Snapchat, I don't know, dating apps.

[00:12:35]And everyone is saying, "It's It does not work." Of course it does not work, because you are not going in with the intention of finding someone.

[00:12:44]You're going in with the intention that Yeah, I want some attention. I want to feel like I'm enough.

[00:12:52]>> [snorts] >> I truly believe this. I truly believe that people are going in with the with and that they they aren't aware of it.

[00:12:58]They aren't aware of of the lacking of self-worth in themselves.

[00:13:08]They lack self-worth. So, therefore, they are searching it in Yeah, in these apps.

[00:13:16]And wherever they can find it. And when they feel like, "Yeah, I've gotten enough.

[00:13:21]I can delete the app and then come back later." And And people truly believe that that is how they will find some something that is making them secure and satisfied. But that does not correlate and that is not what I truly believe.

[00:13:40]I believe that if you go out you find someone and you work on the relationship, you will become happy and satisfied because they are caring about you.

[00:13:52]They think about you. They value you and they respect you. And isn't that what we want all along?

[00:14:01]I don't know. I just feel like hookup culture is BS. It's nothing anyone should strive for because >> [sighs] >> I truly believe that it is coming from a unsecure place.

[00:14:17]Truly. And that people should look more into themselves because nothing outside of you can make you happy and satisfied.

[00:14:26]Nothing. And I I just see people believing that. They believe that attention words others' approval will give them some kind of side satisfaction. But at the end of the day, you are living with your own thoughts, with your own feelings, and your own decisions. And you will be totally alone.

[00:14:51]You will be alone because you have not done the work to keep someone in your life.

[00:14:57]And that is what will be haunting you at the end of the day.

[00:15:02]So yeah, I'm still working on finding someone real and I believe that there are people out there who also want the same thing. I just have to trust them and and if not, that is that is okay. That is okay. I will find my person eventually.

[00:15:24]Yeah. So, that is what I believe.

[00:15:27]Truly.

[00:15:29]What do you think? I feel like you guys have some strong opinions. You always do. And I always like to read your comments. So, if you have any thoughts whatsoever, please share them down below.

[00:15:42]And I will read as many as I can.

[00:15:44]Yeah, thank you so much for watching.

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