Why Your Muslim Family Rejects Rationality? || Acharya Prashant, IIT Kanpur

Añadido: 2026-05-26

[00:00:00]When I see the religious practice, particularly in my household, I see some of the practice like our forefathers did, so we are doing it. You are a Muslim. Be it a Hindu, a Muslim, a Christian, anybody, [music] the highest objective of religion is truth.

[00:00:19]Truth.

[00:00:21]But how should I like convince them to do it?

[00:00:24]>> no, don't convince them. Just [music] ask them.

[00:00:29]It's a very personal thing, right? You cannot force yourself on somebody.

[00:00:39]Uh Namaste Dadiji and I am I'm the first year student of PG at IIT Kanpur. So the my question is that when I see the religious practice that in my household, particularly in my household, I see some of the practice that are going without some rational and like our forefathers did, so we are doing it. But I want to introduce that rational to my family, to my like elders, like my father and my other and like my grandfather. So for that, how should I approach them or how should I discuss it with them?

[00:01:14]So what's that it does not like offend their faith and it does not like offend them?

[00:01:20]Mhm.

[00:01:21]You'll have to tell them that the objective of religion is not to attain a heaven, not to please a a a a holy figure, but to come to your own inner truth and that is sacred.

[00:01:50]You'll have to tell them.

[00:01:53]I'm a Muslim.

[00:01:55]I'm a Muslim.

[00:01:55]>> You are a Muslim.

[00:01:58]Be it a Hindu, a Muslim, a Christian, anybody.

[00:02:02]The highest objective of religion is truth.

[00:02:12]Truth.

[00:02:14]Your family would understand the word hak.

[00:02:18]Yes.

[00:02:19]Hak. That is the highest.

[00:02:24]And if the truth is the highest, then shouldn't you begin by dropping falsenesses wherever you see them?

[00:02:38]Is that not a good way to begin?

[00:02:41]Yeah, that's a very good way to begin.

[00:02:43]But the thing is the rational you have, I have, but how should I like uh convince them to do that? No, don't convince them. Just ask them what is it that they want and show them.

[00:02:56]Yeah, request them and show them that that which they really want, which is the objective and the pinnacle of all religion, is not going to be attained through blind ritualism.

[00:03:12]Yes, of course.

[00:03:14]If they are religious, then shouldn't they be truly religious?

[00:03:22]If I say I'm religious and you tell me, "No, no, no, religion is nothing, waste." Then obviously I'll be offended, I won't listen to you.

[00:03:32]Yeah.

[00:03:33]So even practically this kind of approach won't work.

[00:03:37]Yes. Right? A far better approach, which is not just a good policy, but actually a very honest thing to do, is to ask, "If you are religious, sir, don't you want to be truly and purely religious?

[00:03:56]And religion is about a total commitment to the truth, is it not?

[00:04:04]Yes.

[00:04:07]And if I am to be committed to the truth, shouldn't the first thing be to examine my life as I'm living?

[00:04:15]Huh? And wherever I spot fakeness, falseness, hollowness, ignorance, drop it?

[00:04:26]Yes. Huh? If I'm doing something as a mere ritual without knowing what it means, am I being truthful?

[00:04:34]No. So, that's the question to ask. It's a very simple question.

[00:04:40]Huh?

[00:04:40]In the holy books, it is often said, "You you you must never live in falseness, in darkness, in hollow dreams.

[00:04:51]Do not go down the wrong lane."

[00:04:54]They declare that way, don't they?

[00:04:58]What do those What do those words, those lines, what do they really mean?

[00:05:05]Huh?

[00:05:06]See things as they are. That's what they mean.

[00:05:11]Do not be captivated by mere appearances.

[00:05:16]Do not live on hearsay.

[00:05:23]And and tradition is not necessarily truth.

[00:05:28]Just because people have been doing something since years or since centuries, that does not become the truth.

[00:05:36]So, can we can we look at our our religions, our traditions, our rituals, our beliefs, huh? And say, "Well, we are committed to purity.

[00:05:51]Don't we want to refine our thoughts?

[00:05:53]Our our traditions?

[00:05:56]Don't we want to be to be coming to the sacred with a certain honesty?

[00:06:08]Isn't there pretense in a lot of things that we do in the name of religion?

[00:06:15]And that's a question that you should not answer. That's a question that they should answer.

[00:06:20]>> [laughter] >> Because you see, it's a very personal thing.

[00:06:25]Right? It's about reaching your own inner truth.

[00:06:28]You cannot bulldoze somebody. You cannot force yourself on somebody. You cannot drag somebody to liberation.

[00:06:37]That's often I found like whenever I try to like tell them something or try to explain to them something, I get stuck and from my They say the faith comes from above.

[00:06:47]That is the thing that the where I get stuck and I cannot like go ahead without offending or offending their their religion.

[00:06:57]I have learned it the hard way and you must benefit from my experience that of offense is not necessarily the the best way.

[00:07:08]Don't do that. Don't try that. That should be your last resort, you see.

[00:07:12]Not that you are totally discounted, but that should be used only when nothing else works.

[00:07:20]You see, I am a religious person, right?

[00:07:23]In my own mind, in my own belief, I'm doing the right thing.

[00:07:28]I think I'm pleasing my Lord, right? If I do these things, then the the Lord will be happy. That is how most religious persons would describe their actions, right?

[00:07:39]If I do all these things, then the master, the Lord, he'll be the he'll be happy.

[00:07:46]Your question must be, have you actually understood Hm?

[00:07:52]What what what the truth is?

[00:07:57]What If you want to be religious, are you sure the path you are walking is truly religious?

[00:08:06]Yes, you want to be a good person.

[00:08:08]That's what we often say. Religious people are are good people, right?

[00:08:12]They they At least the religious ones like to say that.

[00:08:16]But are you sure They consider themselves that way, yes.

[00:08:20]But can we be sure that the path you are walking in the name of religion is actually of goodness?

[00:08:29]Can And even if you are walking down the right path, can we somehow increase the pace?

[00:08:36]Maybe you're going in the right direction. Yes, the direction is almost right, but can we choose the smarter lane?

[00:08:48]Instead of being approximately religious, can we be exactly religious?

[00:08:55]You can't tell them that what you're doing in the name of religion is actually the opposite of religion.

[00:09:01]Which often is the truth, by the way.

[00:09:04]But But if you put it But if you put it that way, their their listening would simply stop at that point. Don't do that.

[00:09:15]You Yeah.

[00:09:16]A religious person, there are some things that you ought to respect about them.

[00:09:22]They do make sacrifices in the name of religion, right?

[00:09:27]I think Sometimes they would limit their consumption, sometimes they won't even eat.

[00:09:34]Sometimes they'll want to modify their behavior.

[00:09:38]Hm?

[00:09:39]there are a lot of adjustments that they make, a lot of prices that they pay to be called as religious.

[00:09:51]And let's respect their sentiment.

[00:09:55]In their own mind, they are trying to do the right thing.

[00:09:59]Just that they do not really know that what they are doing in the name of rightness or righteousness is not really the right thing.

[00:10:10]So, don't tell them I have come to break you.

[00:10:13]Tell them I have come to improve you, and that's also true. That's also the honest thing to tell them.

[00:10:20]You don't want to break them, right? You want to help them improve.

[00:10:26]Yeah.

[00:10:29]Often going closer to the scripture also helps.

[00:10:33]Because a lot of religious people, in fact, not lot, an overwhelming majority of religious people have never by themselves studied the scripture.

[00:10:46]Yeah, that's one thing I often find that they just follow someone, like some like guy who knows the scriptures. They follow them. They don't actually try to understand what it is like here written in it.

[00:11:00]Yes. So, I often one recent thing happened to me. Like I was telling my friend that you read this thing that this scripture or religious scripture, it will like have different meaning for you.

[00:11:16]Repeat, repeat. Your last sentence got totally broken.

[00:11:21]Recently, I have had had an experience with a friend. So, I tell him that I am reading this scripture to understand something which can have different meaning Meaning single sentence can have different meaning in the scripture. Like to understand it, I have to do it myself. I cannot just follow someone else work or someone else what they have understood.

[00:11:45]So, he said that no, I believe in them.

[00:11:48]I like I believe in them. They have more knowledge than me. They have more experience than me. So, I follow them. I can follow them. So, how should how should I like convince them?

[00:11:59]You yourself should do it. It will like benefit you more. Or it is like he is right and I am wrong.

[00:12:07]See, all all good books exist to awaken your consciousness, to make you brighter, sharper, clearer.

[00:12:21]Right?

[00:12:23]And if you are to constantly stay someone who needs some kind of a middle man to to approach the scripture, then it doesn't behoove the very the purpose of the scripture.

[00:12:40]In the beginning, yes.

[00:12:43]A few years, maybe.

[00:12:46]You can have someone who interprets it for you.

[00:12:51]But if that person, I refer to as middle man, you can call that person as a teacher, a guru, somebody, a Maulvi.

[00:13:00]If that person is actually doing his task properly, then after a point, you should be able to relate to the scripture on your own.

[00:13:16]Otherwise, the entire process has failed, has it not?

[00:13:21]Yes, yes.

[00:13:22]Because because the whole purpose of scripture is to help you stand on your own and live life independently.

[00:13:32]And to have a very very personal and intimate relationship with the truth.

[00:13:39]When it comes to you and the truth, do you want somebody in between?

[00:13:44]No.

[00:13:45]No. No, right? So, yes, initially uh you can um depend on an interpretation or someone who is uh you know, doing the uh teaching [clears throat] thing for you. Maybe, yes.

[00:14:00]But, you must also keep asking yourself, am I growing within or not?

[00:14:07]Am I developing a personal relationship with the book or not?

[00:14:13]Can I see the words in clearer light by myself or not?

[00:14:21]Also, have I become sharp enough to see a meaning beyond the traditional one?

[00:14:28]If not at all places, then at least at a few places?

[00:14:35]If that is happening, then it's a healthy relationship between the individual and the scripture.

[00:14:42]Whereas, if the person is just depending on belief, you know, this is the common interpretation doing the rounds.

[00:14:53]So, I too have bought it.

[00:14:56]If that is your position, then there is a great problem.

[00:15:07]Okay, sir.

[00:15:08]I understood it. Like, we have to have a personal relationship with the scripture and to like uh to get a beyond meaning of what it is written in uh uh rather than what is the other person of the middle man is explaining.

[00:15:23]After uh his guidance.

[00:15:26]I understood.

[00:15:26]>> Because because you see the truth is to follow this this Yes, because the truth is a very very intimate thing. Is it not? Yes. Yeah, I also think it's very personal for me about these kind of things. It is quite personal to me.

[00:15:42]Mhm.

[00:15:45]I also think the same.

[00:15:49]And when you are speaking to to people in matters of religion, be a little discreet.

[00:16:00]On one hand, you are responsible and you are loving, so you want to bring the right thing to a lot of people.

[00:16:09]That is understandable and appreciable.

[00:16:12]But also uh you must understand not everybody is ready.

[00:16:21]So, no point trying to push your way through.

[00:16:27]Yes? Yeah, that is the thing I follow. I like charity begins at home. I want to like improve myself first, then go out.

[00:16:35]Yes. Yes. Yes.

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