Americans Can't Pretend Everything Is Fine Anymore

[00:00:00]Y'all, it's happening again.

[00:00:03]I'm a licensed therapist of over 22 years, and I have seen my fair share of collective trauma here in the US. I have seen what people go through due to the amount of school shootings we have, due to the varying recessions we have. But right now, people are depressed, anxious, and they can't afford their bills, their mortgage, their groceries, their anything. People are not able to have a night out, to go on vacation, to decompress, because here in the US, we don't get a lot of paid time off from jobs the way that other countries do.

[00:00:41]So, unsurprisingly, our collective mental health is in the toilet. And so many of us saw this coming. And on top of that, people can't afford mental health care.

[00:00:56]>> I just lit my groceries three different ways in order to pay for them with a line of people behind me.

[00:01:09]I wanted to cry so bad walking out of that store.

[00:01:14]It's so embarrassing.

[00:01:18]All I want to do is provide for my family and my friends and myself.

[00:01:27]I want to create a future where I can help other people, and I can't even buy my own groceries right now.

[00:01:37]I'm so done struggling.

[00:01:40]>> The current state of the economy is kicking my ass. I don't know if I'm the only one, but I feel like my fiance and I just work we work and work and work and work just to pay bills, just to afford the house we have, to afford groceries, to make sure that everyone is comfortable. And it's a lot. It is a lot and you guys can say oh the economy is great.

[00:02:03]Y'all again I voted for the current president the economy is not great. I don't care what you're saying groceries have gone up exponentially and I can say specific items because I buy the same specific items when I go to the store. I buy this this that and the other and [snorts] there's no reason for it to be increased right? Gas oh my God. Gas is so unaffordable and to get to work you obviously have to buy the gas to get there.

[00:02:31]And that's unaffordable and it's no one's getting raises no one's getting bonuses like I'm just stressed to the nines and I don't know if it's just me but I know 8 years ago when my fiance and I first were dating we were able to put much more into savings life was much more affordable and mind you we were making less than. So obviously something isn't working.

[00:02:56]>> I'm not okay.

[00:02:58]That's just the truth.

[00:03:00]And I'm scared.

[00:03:02]>> [snorts] >> I'm really worried for what this month brings.

[00:03:07]Like >> [snorts] >> I know I can't keep up this grind or Door Dashing 13 hours a day to make things work.

[00:03:14]I'm tired man.

[00:03:17]Go out from 6 p.m. to 4 a.m. every day and then again from 8:00 to noon and it's >> [snorts] >> I'm not sleeping I'm not eating I'm not taking care of myself but life can't stop.

[00:03:32]But I also don't know how much more I can take.

[00:03:38]I think that's the part that's scaring me the most right now is I don't know how much more I can physically take.

[00:03:48]I'm tired man just tired.

[00:03:52]I'm so tired.

[00:03:57]>> Every single day I see a new video of someone coming on here crying because they can't afford groceries. Crying because they can't afford gas. Sitting here panicking because they don't know how to they're going to be able to buy their kids food and clothes.

[00:04:11]They can't even get to work.

[00:04:13]People struggling to the point of they don't want to be here anymore. They're ready to check out.

[00:04:18]That's how bad it is.

[00:04:19]The economy is only good for the wealthy. It is absolutely piss-poor for anyone else.

[00:04:26]And you got all these people up in Washington making $200,000 a year plus all the benefits they get from stock trading, uh living high on the hog.

[00:04:35]They don't even have to go to the gas station or grocery store. They pay people to do that for them. They don't even know what the prices are. They haven't seen what the price of eggs is.

[00:04:43]They don't know.

[00:04:44]They just know they can afford it.

[00:04:46]They don't have to worry about grocery prices or gas prices. They don't ever see a gas pump or grocery store. They have people to do it for them.

[00:04:52]That's why they're so disconnected from reality because they live in a different reality. They live in a reality where everything is just an arm's reach. They don't have to worry about struggle. They don't have to worry about can I afford this. They just they just buy it because we pay for it for them.

[00:05:07]And they're just going to keep doing it until we're all living in cardboard boxes.

[00:05:12]I don't know about you, but I I'll fight to the last drop of blood to make sure that don't happen.

[00:05:18]>> I have not seen my wife or kids in 3 days.

[00:05:22]On Friday, I woke up at 5:00 a.m. and I worked until 10:00. They were all asleep.

[00:05:28]Saturday, woke up at 5:00 a.m. I worked until 9:30. They were all asleep. I have been working since 5:00. It is now 6:00 at night and I have another 3 hours left to work because I am working around the clock to be able to afford life because it's so damn expensive.

[00:05:47]And I'm affording life. We're getting by, but I have not seen my family in 3 days.

[00:05:54]And I got to do the same thing tomorrow.

[00:05:56]I got to work around the clock because bills are being bills.

[00:06:02]And y'all might say that oh, the economy is fine. Everybody's surviving.

[00:06:07]Everybody's No.

[00:06:09]Keep telling yourself that little lie.

[00:06:12]We are all hurting because of one person that is in charge of this country.

[00:06:19]So, yes.

[00:06:22]We need to make a change.

[00:06:26]Period.

[00:06:28]Because we are all drowning except for the rich.

[00:06:34]This is a 3-day crash out. I don't get political.

[00:06:39]But I do get political when it affects my finances and when it affects my life.

[00:06:46]This sucks.

[00:06:56]I don't even want to hear it.

[00:07:00]>> Bro, when there's just nothing else that you can cut back on, boy. There's no more cutting back on Starbucks coffees, subscriptions. There's nothing left. I'm out here managing and budgeting using the vending machine.

[00:07:14]I'm going days where I'm like, bro, I I ain't going to eat for lunch. I'm going to wait till I get back home.

[00:07:19]Ain't nothing else left to cut out.

[00:07:21]It's crazy. I'm making the most money I probably didn't ever make. Ain't no probably. I didn't ever made.

[00:07:27]Yeah, I don't ever see it.

[00:07:30]It'd be gone. The bills be snatching it.

[00:07:34]I'm not even going to say we're not making enough money. Everything is too high.

[00:07:38]Ain't ain't no way at $36 an hour, we're getting close to 40 an hour, you just barely making it.

[00:07:45]You just be having enough and maybe a couple hundred extra. That's crazy.

[00:07:51]What is going on?

[00:07:52]>> Can someone explain to me how we're supposed to get ahead in life?

[00:07:58]Seems like every time I try to have money saved up, something comes up.

[00:08:04]Whether that be my car, my child needs something, dinner work. I mean, there's always something.

[00:08:15]My gallbladder needs taking out.

[00:08:18]Oh, man, that's going to be $2,000 for a CT scan.

[00:08:27]Why do we even have medical insurance if they don't even pay all of it?

[00:08:31]Why?

[00:08:33]It's all about money, money, money.

[00:08:34]Take, take, take.

[00:08:39]We need a break out.

[00:08:42]This is getting old real quick.

[00:08:46]I am really tired of this work harder [ __ ] Like, how much harder am I supposed to work before I'm actually allowed to live?

[00:08:56]I'm exhausted. I'm burnt out. I'm tired of waking up every day just to survive another day, to still be broke, behind, and drowning.

[00:09:07]And maybe the problem isn't that I'm just lazy or that I'm weak. Maybe I'm trying to force myself into a lifestyle and a culture that literally does not fit who I am as a person.

[00:09:18]Because America is go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go.

[00:09:21]Work, bills, stress, hustle, productivity, and then repeat.

[00:09:24]And if you're a single mom here, forget it.

[00:09:29]Because you're expected to do everything alone and still smile and act grateful for for opportunity that you have to be overworked and under supported.

[00:09:40]I don't want a luxury life. I don't want designer [ __ ] I don't need to be rich.

[00:09:47]I just want peace.

[00:09:49]I want enough energy at the end of the day to enjoy my child.

[00:09:55]I want to be able to cook dinner without feeling like I'm going to collapse.

[00:09:59]And I want a home that's not a physical manifestation of my mental exhaustion.

[00:10:05]I want community. I want softness.

[00:10:09]I want family life. I want to exist without feeling like every second of my life has to be optimized or monetized.

[00:10:17]And honestly, maybe some people are built for this hustle culture. Maybe some people thrive in this environment, but I don't.

[00:10:26]And I'm tired of pretending like I do.

[00:10:27]I'm tired of masking. I'm tired of forcing myself to operate like a machine when my body and mind is screaming at me that this pace is not sustainable for you.

[00:10:38]People keep saying, "You just have to work harder." Meanwhile, I'm already running on fumes. Like maybe no, I don't need to work harder. Maybe I just need a different life.

[00:10:49]And maybe that means leaving.

[00:10:52]>> [snorts] >> Maybe that means moving somewhere slower, somewhere more family oriented, somewhere where people actually know how to live instead of just survive paycheck to paycheck while pretending that this is normal.

[00:11:05]Because this [ __ ] does not feel normal anymore.

[00:11:09]There is nothing else to cut.

[00:11:12]There's nothing left for me to cut.

[00:11:17]I have cut so much out of my life just to make it.

[00:11:21]When I say everything is high.

[00:11:28]Gas price is high.

[00:11:30]I'm filling up my tank every three to four business days.

[00:11:34]Three to four business days.

[00:11:36]Everything is high. Food high. LIGHT BILLS HIGH. GAS BILL HIGH. Gas prices high.

[00:11:43]RENT IS HIGH. THE SKY IS HIGH. I am tired.

[00:11:48]I make the most money I've ever made in my life. It may not be much to a lot of people, but to me it's a lot. I could potentially make up not to put my financial business out there.

[00:11:59]Potentially take home 2,400 depending on how I work.

[00:12:06]My thing is, I never SEE THE MONEY. I NEVER SEE IT. WHERE IS IT? WHERE DID IT GO? IT DISAPPEARED.

[00:12:13]IT'S IN MY ACCOUNT AND POOF OUT. GONE.

[00:12:15]Two seconds. Out of there. Gone. Like just gone.

[00:12:21]I'm not understanding what is going on with this economy. I don't know what's happening. But, I am tired of making the cuts.

[00:12:31]I bring my own lunch to work.

[00:12:35]I skip meals. I I'm going to be A TWO TEETH BY SUMMER.

[00:12:39]I'M GOING TO BE A TWO TEETH BY SUMMER. I PROMISE YOU.

[00:12:43]I I I I don't know what to do. We have officially hit the breaking point.

[00:12:54]So, now my question is, what do we do?

[00:12:58]The breaking point means that everything as it's been getting more expensive has now collectively gotten too expensive.

[00:13:06]So, that it's not just people kind of getting behind on things.

[00:13:09]We're like from the point of no return where like there is no catching up anymore.

[00:13:16]Nobody can tell me I need to go work 80 hours a week doing something because I'm still getting now outpaced by the price of gas, electric, food.

[00:13:29]What are we supposed to do?

[00:13:31]Like this genuine human me to you like, what are we supposed to actually do?

[00:13:37]Because unfortunately right now, like as most people are, they don't own anything.

[00:13:44]I don't own my car. I don't own the house I live in. I don't own these things.

[00:13:49]And so if I don't pay for them, I lose them. So, if there's a so many other people in the same spot, I'm just trying to see like the bigger picture and I'm trying to like have like a conversation here because um obviously like it's very clear that we're in a systematic collapse.

[00:14:10]But I think like it's what are we now going to do because there is no hyper individualism. I can't sit here and take any hyper individualistic advice to somehow turn my life around because it does it's not going to work.

[00:14:24]The world has now fallen apart so much, at least like the whole system we've lived in.

[00:14:33]So, I mean what what are we supposed to do? What are we going to do?

[00:14:37]And I'm just open to hear like all thoughts and whatever else because like ultimately most people's boomer ended advice is not going to help anybody and that era is over.

[00:14:49]The idea of going and working for somebody else and saying that this now solves my day-to-day livelihood problems are well over.

[00:15:00]So, >> Okay, sitting here at my desk, um watching Tik just scrolling through TikTok and I'm seeing a lot of the age of disclosure videos.

[00:15:13]Um and I feel like I'll just want to join the conversation. I pride myself on being fairly honest. If you ask me a question, I'll give you an honest answer.

[00:15:22]Um I don't normally volunteer information and I wear my mask very well, but I'm tired. Um I am a single mom of three boys with the oldest being in uh college, a senior in college, and the youngest being 7 and 1/2, so a second grader.

[00:15:39]Um This is I'm only telling this for context, not for sympathy, not for excuses, anything like that. Um I make almost $57,000 a year and I remember when I got this job, I was 2 years ago, I was so excited cuz I never made over $50,000 a year and in my brain, everything was going to be fixed. I'm finally making some real money.

[00:16:04]Um that real money has turned into chump change now.

[00:16:09]Um I live in the outskirts of Nashville, Tennessee because the rent prices in Nashville drove me away.

[00:16:18]Um but even now, based on the economy, my rent that I pay for my two-bedroom, under 1,000 sq ft apartment, um is basically the ghetto of my city.

[00:16:33]I live in the hood of my city, literally.

[00:16:38]Um I know you see these nails, these nails are from Shein, She-in, however you say it. They're $1.50. Um I buy my kids' clothes through that using Afterpay.

[00:16:49]Um because that's the only way I really can afford to clothe my children that are growing like weeds. Um I drive a 2010 Lexus that was given to me by my dad um and stepmom. Um [snorts] that car now needs brakes, but the brakes for that car, because it's a Lexus, cost $1,300.

[00:17:11]1,300. Um I can't afford that cuz right now, in order to pay my rent one month, I had to take out a title loan against that car and I'm still having to pay that back. I live through the benefits that my online bank gives me. So, I am taking out my pay loans, which is basically taking money from my check that I'm going to get the next time or oh, you qualify for this instant loan. I do that. Um everyone's like, why are you single? Why don't you have a boyfriend? And I can't afford to go anywhere to meet anybody.

[00:17:48]So, if he not finding me at my church where I'm serving, he's not finding me at the grocery store cuz I'm shopping for these kids.

[00:17:55]I I don't know where I'm going to find a man or see a man or have a man approach me.

[00:18:00]Um my only indulgences for myself is I get my hair done. Right now it looks a mess. I just took a style down and I need to wash it. But, every what?

[00:18:10]Eight weeks, I pay $145 to get my hair done and even then even then that is a okay, this week I can get it done. Well, no, it needs to be done right now, but we going to have to stretch it for another 2 weeks. Even then.

[00:18:27]I take my kids to the barber college 30 minutes away in order for me to pay $25 for them to get haircuts instead of paying $65 collectively for them to get haircuts closer to me.

[00:18:43]It makes no sense. I love my job. I don't want to look for another job cuz I love my job. It allows me a lot of freedom. It's not stressful, which I've had stressful jobs for so long that I don't want to give this up, but I've also for the last 2 years had to work at Target part-time during Christmas to even give my babies a Christmas.

[00:19:08]And that's working an additional 25 to 30 hours a week on top of my 40 hours a week at my at-home job. My kids hate that cuz they want me at home.

[00:19:21]It it it's something's got to give.

[00:19:24]Something's got to give. I don't know what's going to give. I'm also tired.

[00:19:29]I am so tired.

[00:19:31]Do I want to take I can't I want to take my kids on vacations. I want to take them to the newest kids zone slide park trampoline park. I want to be able to do all those things for them. But when I'm trying to figure out finagle how to keep lights on, which my lights are prepaid. I'm on the prepaid plan, so it's just a matter of keeping so much in my account so they don't turn my lights off.

[00:19:59]Um My cell phone bill is paid by my sister cuz we're all on a plan and she pays for me and my my middle baby, my 14-year-old.

[00:20:08]She pays for our bill. But she doesn't have any kids, so that's not something she really complains about. But it shouldn't be on her because I should be able to do it. Um >> [snorts] >> Something's just got to give and I don't know what's going to give. I I I don't I don't know, but something it's stupid.

[00:20:25]All of it is stupid. And quite honestly, I am tired. I pray a lot. I pray a lot and literally my prayer is God, you gave me these kids. You have to provide for these kids. And he continues to do it.

[00:20:39]Is it stressful? Absolutely. Am I still stressed? Absolutely.

[00:20:44]I am still stressed and it it just doesn't it doesn't make I don't know. I don't know.

[00:20:51]I don't understand jobs not giving a living wage raise every year when the cost of living goes up every single year.

[00:21:03]But last year I think I got a 57-cent raise or something stupid because my supervisor wanted to say that my communication wasn't good.

[00:21:14]We don't have to talk that much, quite honestly. Quite honestly.

[00:21:19]I don't know. I don't know. I just thought I'd join the conversation. I haven't even began to talk about my health care, dental care, vision care for me and these kids. I That's a whole 'nother video. A whole 'nother one.

[00:21:37]There's no wiggle room anymore. And that's not from people that are rich or influencers. This is from your everyday middle class Americans. Things are really bad out there right now. A lot of people are just trapped with these high mortgages. They are wanting to sell their home, but they can't. They want to leave the country. They're really considering it. Things are just getting really hard because the margin that most people have always been able to experience is disappearing. And to live without any margin, you just feel like you're just going to fall off the edge at any time. And I'm sure you all understand what I'm saying. I mean, the space that we used to have for a surprise bill, for a car repair, a rent increase, all of that space is disappearing. And life just feels a lot more fragile when, like I said, you don't have those margins. And that's why all of this matters. That's why talking about it matters because it's not to spread fear, but it's to be awake as to what is really going on. And people that will pivot, people that will do something about this are those that are not just going to put your head in the sand because that doesn't do anything. That's not going to fix the problem. You're going to pull your head back up out of the sand and then realize that things are even worse. So, we have to do things now. You got to pay attention to what's going on around you. Look at where your own pressure points are and try and figure out a plan for yourself, for your family, because now is still a great time to be able to do those things. We still have the ability to move, to pivot, to make changes. It's not too late, you guys. Now's definitely a great time to do it. So, I really recommend please doing that.

[00:23:21]Uh we talk about some practical uh things that we're always doing over on our other channel, The New Exodus, my husband and I. So, go ahead and check that out. Um you know, if that kind of thing interests you. I also have a vlog channel where I'm showing where uh basically what we're doing to pivot right now in life. And uh basically uh how we're working hard to kind of exit the system. So, that's over on my vlog channel, She Prepares, and I'll put all the links down in the description box below. Um so, you guys can go ahead and check those out, but let me know what your thoughts are right now. Let me know what you're doing or what you would even plan to do, what you would like to do.

[00:24:01]Sometimes, it's just a matter of thinking about what you want to do and writing it down. Write it down on a piece of paper, type it in the comments, but expressing that, putting that out there, because then you will subconsciously continue to work towards that. And um I think everybody should do that. You know, we always write down our goals, and you know, it's not like a you know, something magical that just happens when you do that, but it is really powerful um in terms of staying focused and um being proactive. You know, write down your goals, write down changes that you want to see in your life, and then start taking baby steps to work towards that, because it does take work, but believe in yourself, even if other people aren't believing in you. Um you got to believe in yourself, okay? And take hope. Thank you for watching, and I hope to catch you guys in the next video. Until then, take care.