This pragmatic autopsy of marriage strips away the romantic fluff to reveal a calculated social contract built on tax codes and survival networks. It’s a sharp reminder that our most intimate bonds are often just ancient strategies for legal security and social accountability.
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Is There An Actual Purpose to Marriage? | QTCinderella Asks Hank AnythingAdded:
I may be the chunc.
But you could just be the unc.
This is bringing up some bad memories from high school.
No, no no no!
Your net worth is probably majority in... Beanie Babies.
70 years old!
Am I alone?
Loser!
Do you wanna read my first thing on my list?
(bleep) measuring.
I'm Hank Green.
And I'm QTCinderella.
And this is "Ask Hank Anything". "Ask Hank Anything".
(bright jingle) (whoosh) Hello, and welcome to "Ask"- Hello!
And welcome to "Ask"- My bad. (QT chuckles) Sorry.
Yeah, I'm a heckler.
(Hank laughs) Hello, and welcome to "Ask Hank Anything".
I'm Hank Green, and I love learning, and I love answering questions, so I created a show where people ask me questions and then I go out and I learn about those answers so that I can answer their questions, and best of all, we get to talk about the answers, I get to learn about my guests, based on what they are curious about.
I don't know if you knew that part.
This is QTCinderella.
Hi! (laughs) I'm so happy I didn't ask half the questions that I was gonna ask then.
Yeah.
Well I feel like I learned a bunch about you just, just diggin' in here.
Okay.
What I generally find is that people are worried about stuff.
It seems like you're a little worried about stuff, but Blaire, if you don't know, Blaire is the founder of the Streamer Awards, streamer, podcaster, baker of amazing cakes and cookies.
It's true.
Here you are.
And we have met once before.
Yeah.
And we had food together.
Yeah.
And now you we're hanging out again.
You were lucky, 'cause you weren't sitting by me, 'cause I was being insanely critical at that restaurant.
(both laugh) The whole time, I was like, "I wouldn't do it like that."
Oh wow.
I'm one of those.
Are you, aww, that's why, this is why I know nothing about food.
Uh-huh.
So I can be like, "Yeah, seems great."
You're like, "Yummy!" (laughs) "This is awesome!" No.
Sometimes people, like, pay money to be good at judging wine.
And I'm like- Oh!
That is the worst choice.
You just took a class to make your life more expensive.
Yeah, I agree.
And also like, wine just never tastes better.
In my opinion.
You know what it tastes like? Yeah.
I think that wine is done.
I think it's over.
Oh! It's out?
Uh-huh.
I think it- Wine is out.
I think we're moving on.
Okay! To what?
After, you know, after 80,000 years or whatever that we've been doing wine, I think we're done with it.
I think we're just gonna have, you know, tea.
Well no, not tea, because apparently the microplastics from the bag.
Loose leaf, maybe.
Really? Okay. That's how I go!
Good.store.
This is anachronistic, 'cause of course we upload this forever ago, but you are about, like, the awards are about to happen.
Yeah. They're on Saturday.
And it is?
Monday. (laughs) So I am very grateful that you did this.
I cannot believe that you had time right now.
I couldn't, I couldn't say no!
Okay!
There was not, it was non-optional for me.
Okay!
I was very excited. Beautiful.
To learn. Yeah. Excellent.
You're ChatGPT's biggest op.
(Hank laughs) What does that mean?
Yeah, like you're... Like opposition?
Like, yeah!
I could've like, you're in rival gangs, essentially.
Yeah.
'Cause I could've just asked.
You could've!
I would never, 'cause of the environment.
You would get different results.
Are you saying you're better?
Are you throwing down the, whoa!
I'm more entertaining.
I can tell you that. Okay.
Yeah, that's fair.
I don't know that the, the quality of information could go either way, obviously. Okay.
The robots are coming for you.
As far as the sort of structure of it, I do think I do a better job.
Okay.
But this first question, ChatGPT would've been terrible at.
Okay.
And we together are going to answer it, I think very well.
Okay.
This is Puzzle the Pelican.
Inside of Puzzle the Pelican's pouch is your questions.
What? Do I just draw random?
Yeah, we'll draw from the top.
Okay. (laughs) Oh! Yes!
Yes, why don't billionaires just give away their money?
The one, the answer that ChatGPT will tell you is probably because they don't have it.
What?
So like, (laughs).
I would've never, wait a second!
So, your net worth is probably majority in?
Beanie Babies. (laughs) Majority.
(Hank laughs) Well, have you asked?
I would, I would say it's, it's probably majority in the Streamer Awards.
Do you think?
Is that my net worth?
So that is a, that is a business that you own.
Do you own it with anybody else?
No!
So you own that outright?
That's yours.
Okay. I'm impressive.
Like, at some point, somebody might wanna pay you a lot of money for that.
It's very hard to value it, especially because I have, it's not- Wait!
The most profitable engagement.
Okay, shut up!
It's, well I've run events.
It's a hard business.
Wow, you're picking fights.
Sorry. I'll back that up.
Okay.
In my experience running events, it is a difficult business to make work as an individual running a show all by yourself.
Yeah.
But then if you lump it into something bigger, you know, some events company buys it, and then you've got a bunch of money.
But that technically is like, the value of your business, and you own it.
Right.
And so if you had somebody come by and do a valuation of the business, it might be that the majority of your net worth is in that business, which you cannot- Whoa!
Spend that money.
Right. Okay.
But that's like imaginary money!
It is, it is imaginary money.
Okay.
Now, Jeff Bezos is in a, you know, you and Jeff Bezos, in similar situations.
Yes. I would say so.
In that, all of his, something like 90% of his net worth is in Amazon stock, which he could theoretically sell.
Right, right, right.
But there's a bunch of reasons why he doesn't wanna sell it.
So number one, he doesn't have to.
If he did, he would be taxed on it.
So what he can do instead is just borrow money against it.
He doesn't have to pay money on that.
It doesn't- Borrow money against it?
Why don't they teach this in school?
Well, because people in school don't have billions of dollars around of Amazon stock. Okay.
So like, normal people can't do this.
This is rich person stuff.
My teacher didn't believe in me.
Okay.
(Hank laughs) All right, I mean I could've.
I could've, if maybe I learned.
Okay.
And then also, if he owns less of Amazon, he might lose control of the company.
So if somebody owned more stock than he did, he might not be able to make all the decisions that he wants to make.
He would lose agency.
He would lose control over the company.
Okay. Potentially.
I don't know how like, Amazon stock is classed.
But that's another reason that they don't wanna sell that.
And then also, they don't wanna sell it because it might show that they don't believe in the future of the company.
Oh, and then everyone panics.
Yeah.
Okay.
If he sold, like, all of his shares suddenly.
Yeah.
You know, and- I, too, would panic.
Well, only if Nancy Pelosi panicked.
Correct!
Yes.
Well done.
So those are the, those are the big reasons that they don't just, that they would say, "This isn't my money."
But, I have news for you.
He owns a $500 million boat.
So he can purchase things. Wow!
He can do stuff with his money.
And I looked.
He has donated a lot of money in absolute terms, though probably less than us in terms of percentage of- Okay.
Of net worth.
He gave 200 million to the Smithsonian, 2024.
He gave, in 2023- 200 million is crazy!
He gave $100 million to help homeless families.
These are very big numbers.
Couldn't he solve homelessness?
I haven't done- You haven't done the math?
Could we do the, real quick?
Can we get it really fast at a Future Hank segment here?
Could Jeff Bezos solve homelessness?
(bright pensive music) Really signed Future Hank up for a lot of work here.
This was not an easy question to answer.
So Jeff Bezos has enough wealth to do some enormous things about homelessness in the United States, but solve it on his own is not within the scope of what he could do if he sold all of his stock and he got full value for it.
Jeff Bezos' net worth is roughly in the neighborhood of $270 billion, and the official, like, point in time count of homeless people is around 770,000 people experiencing homelessness at any given moment.
Now, very crudely, if you took every person who was going to be homeless tonight and you divided Jeff Bezos' wealth among them, that would be $350,000 per person, which would pretty much allow them to get housing.
It wouldn't allow them to buy a home in every market where they live, but some markets where they live, and definitely they could pay some rent.
You could imagine something like $25,000 to $35,000 per person per year for like rent and support and administration services.
Housing the current homeless population would cost like roughly $20 to $30 billion per year, so in that sense, Jeff Bezos could theoretically fund a massive national housing intervention for years.
And yet, that is not the same thing as solving homelessness.
State and federal and local governments in the US already spend substantially more than that on housing assistance, rental vouchers, homeless services, public housing, and related programs, which does not meet the full need.
Homelessness is not like a one-time backlog of people who need apartments.
It is a system that keeps producing housing insecurity through high rents, low wages, disability, domestic violence, family breakdown, mental illness, addiction, zoning restrictions, a lack of affordable housing, and weak safety nets.
HUD by itself will receive around $77 billion in 2026.
That includes 38 billion for rental assistance programs like Section 8, while there's like a narrower bucket of federal homelessness-specific funding, which is more like $10 billion a year.
So that $77 billion we spend every year, that is keeping people from being homeless, very actively.
Jeff Bezos on his own could fund that program for like three or four years.
But it's safe to say that, in the US, we spend around $100 billion on housing assistance every year, so Jeff Bezos on his own, if he was able to sell all of his stock, could basically, like, double the amount of money that we spend as a nation on homelessness, for like 2.7 years.
Which wouldn't be nothing.
That wouldn't be nothing.
But, those donations together are not worth more than his boat.
Yeah.
Which is wild, because that, it's, his boat has a boat, and his boat's boat has a boat.
That's crazy to think about. Yeah.
I don't even know how you make a boat that expensive.
I've been on a- I think it's made up.
I've been on a yacht.
I was on a yacht of a man who was married to one of Rupert Murdoch's daughters.
Wow.
They got divorced, and he got the yacht.
Oh!
Yeah! And it had like a hotdog stand.
Wow!
But the crazy thing about the hotdog stand is that the guy who worked at the hotdog stand lived on the boat.
'Cause he has to.
Right.
'Cause he can't like, go home.
Yeah. He's on a boat.
So the hotdog stand guy has like a berth in the basement of the boat.
That's so dystopian.
I was, yes! Yeah.
This is how I felt the entire weekend that I did this fancy advertising festival thing.
That's very "Hunger Games".
Very "Hunger Games".
But, I would like to move on from these objective facts to some opinions.
Okay.
Why do you think?
I think they like their money.
Yeah!
I think, like, I think they like the title.
Right. Do you wanna read my first thing on my list here?
Uh-huh.
It is "dick measuring". Yeah.
I do think they like that.
I like how you said that.
I like- Dick measuring.
Yeah.
Yeah! They're just, they, I think that, to some extent, they wanna be where they are on the list, and they'd like to be higher up on the list.
Do you think that something is wrong with them mentally if they feel that way?
I think that that's pretty screwed up.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah!
I think it's really, like, I understand it, in a way, where it's like, if you've started to optimize for an outcome.
Yeah.
You get really comfortable optimizing for that outcome, and then you just wanna keep optimizing for that outcome, and stopping that can actually be uncomfortable.
I've struggled with, like, YouTube views.
Right, right, right. As this.
Where it's like, well, I know what would give me more views, and I'm like, but I don't wanna do that.
It would actually be worse for me if I used this title.
You don't wanna do pranks in public?
(both laugh) If I started doing really, yeah, really crude pranks.
Started really going after the young male demographic, if you know what I mean.
That could be awesome.
But I do think that there's like, there can be a, like an optimization problem, where you're just so used to doing one thing that you don't know how to do anything else, and it's almost a threat to your identity to start to think about all that other stuff.
How many billionaires are there?
I'll put it on the screen.
This number. Okay.
But you know, the the wild thing is that the difference between like a person who just crossed that line and Jeff Bezos is so wild.
Really? Yeah.
Like Taylor Swift and Jeff Bezos are like, different playing fields.
On different playing fields.
Like obviously, both like, sort of in terms of life situation.
Right.
Closer to each other than they are to us.
Yeah. Yeah.
Well, you don't know.
I don't, you're right!
The next thing I have on my list is, they know best.
No?
But that's what, I think that's what they think.
Okay.
So they're like, "Well I've done all of this.
I've been this successful, so obviously I know better how to deploy capital than some random charity."
Oh!
Is that why a lot of the times they, no no no, they start their own charities to write it off.
They do.
Well what- Smart.
So they start their own charity, meaning they start a fund, and that fund, they donate money to, but the fund doesn't have to donate money.
So it just sits in the fund.
Oh wow! Which is wild!
They can't take that money out of the fund.
They can't do anything with it.
Yeah.
But they oftentimes just leave it in there, one, to continue to accrue, so it can grow along with the stock market.
But two, I think just because they don't prioritize it.
They're like, "I'll get to that eventually.
I'm busy right now."
Interesting.
I think. I don't know.
And this has become such a problem that the government is actually doing regulations that say, if you have a fund, you have to donate a certain amount of it every year.
Okay. Yeah.
That makes sense.
Yeah. That's a good start.
Thanks, government. That's a good start.
I think that it can be really tempting if you're one of these people who's seen your wealth, over 10 years, go from like 10 billion to 100 billion dollars, to say, "Well, I should just hold onto it, because in 10 more years I'll have a trillion dollars."
Right.
"And then I can donate that."
But like, the money, if you donate it, this is what I think nobody gets.
If you donate money, it's out there making the world better, forever.
It doesn't just happen once.
Yeah.
Like if a kid gets to, like, not lose their mom in childbirth.
Yeah.
That keeps being valuable.
Yeah.
Not just for that kid's life, but for like, the whole- World. Whole life.
Yeah.
Like that whole, that kid's whole life is better.
That kid's kid's life is better.
The whole community's life is better.
There's a person, and that person isn't just like, and sometimes I think we imagine that person is like, just like, "Oh, it's saving a life."
But that's a person who's doing stuff in their world.
Yeah, yeah.
And who otherwise wouldn't be if they died in childbirth.
Yeah. Counterpoint.
What if mother is a murderer?
Good point.
What if she gives birth and then- Sometimes mother's a murderess.
Drives down the street and shoots everybody.
Yeah. And that's what, that's Jeff Bezos' like, "I don't know, it's too risky.
I gotta hold onto my money."
I figured him out.
Yeah. (laughs) Okay.
That makes sense.
So those are my four reasons that I put on.
Dick measuring.
They think they know best.
"But what if I wait?
I'll have more money."
Oh, right. Okay.
And it's just not a priority for them, I think.
That's so interesting.
You know, they're like kind of waiting until they retire and don't have other, like- But everyone's so mad at them.
I think they definitely don't care about that.
Oh.
I think that they have somewhat correctly calculated that we're gonna not like them anyway.
Right.
No, that's actually fair.
Yeah, I don't think.
I mean, but I like Taylor Swift.
Yeah!
Not everybody.
Yeah, you're right.
I do wish she would give some money away.
I think that she could.
Okay.
And she could give away more than she has.
It's, I mean, MacKenzie Scott, Jeff Bezos' ex-wife, has like, proved that you can do this.
You can give it away.
Really?
There's capacity to take it and do stuff with.
She's given away a huge amount of her money, and it's out there doing good in the world.
So you can do it. Okay.
All right!
And like, now she doesn't have control over it anymore.
Yeah.
But she doesn't need it! Other people do.
And other people are getting to affect the world.
Yeah.
This is why I think billionaires don't give away their money.
Those are my ideas.
Okay. So if anybody has thoughts, there's comments below.
And if you're a billionaire watching this... There's gonna be one!
Give away some money. Maybe.
Please. Yeah!
Yeah.
Yeah, don't just let it sit there!
Yeah! What the heck?
Have it in the world doing stuff!
Yeah!
We're, this is not healthy.
Something's wrong with you.
(Hank laughs) Well, I meant for the, I meant for the economy.
Oh!
Right. Sorry.
I thought we were talking psychologically.
That was my bad.
But also, maybe, yeah. Maybe.
I don't want you to come for me though.
Yeah!
Call one out!
One time, I met a billionaire, one time, and he introduced, I was with three people.
People may have heard this story before.
This is the third billionaire I've met.
And he shook the person next to me's hand and she introduced herself and the company that she worked for, and then the person next to her, and she introduced herself and the company that she worked for.
And I said, "Hi, I'm Hank," and he looked at me in the eyes and he said, "Only women do that."
And I was like, "What do only women do?"
What?
And he said, "Introduce themselves only by their first name."
And I was like, "Well, I didn't think I mattered in this situation.
Like, these two women are the women whose businesses are relevant to the situation we are in right now."
That's crazy.
And I'm just a guy who's standing next to them!
No, you're a woman.
(Hank laughs) Loser!
You're like me.
So I- (laughs) So I felt like that was very weird.
You didn't tell him about your event planning company?
It's very profitable!
(both laugh) "Maybe someday you'll want it! I don't know!"
"Hey, hey guy.
I throw great parties."
(Hank cackles) Okay.
This is the next question. Okay.
What do I do with this one?
Keep it?
If you would like it.
Okay. Okay.
I shall.
Okay.
You know what's funny?
This is a homey question, 'cause I know the answer, but I wanted to see if you knew the answer.
Test!
Oh! Well, maybe we'll disagree!
Oh!
Then I would immediately fold, and be like, "I don't know the answer."
(bright pensive music) Why is it that the better stuff tastes, the worse it is for you?
There's, there's a lot of little nuances here.
But I think the big answer to the question is that, because it tastes better.
Oh!
Uh-huh.
So it has sugar.
It just tastes, it just tastes, like it doesn't have to have sugar.
I mean, it usually does.
But I think that it like, stuff that tastes better is worse for you because it tastes better.
And so you want more of it.
It's like hacking your reward systems!
Oh!
So you have more than you otherwise would if it didn't taste as good.
Then why don't they invent a pill that makes all good things that taste good taste bad.
I think that there is a thing.
Oh!
So there is, some people doing weight loss, they like, sprinkle their food with stuff that makes it taste worse.
Oh really? Yeah.
Oh wow!
I don't know if this is like, a healthy choice.
No. There's better systems.
Probably not. Now.
Also a little dystopian.
Yeah. What is this?
Okay.
Yeah.
Paul Blart has the vibrating fork.
I don't know if anybody else has seen "Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2"?
He has a vibrating, so he doesn't eat?
And if his fork moves too fast, it vibrates.
Oh wow!
In the classic film, "Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2".
Classic film.
Yeah.
Which comes back later, and he uses the vibrating fork to electrocute a bad guy.
Wow! Sorry for the spoiler.
So I think that's a, that's a really big part of it.
And especially when it comes to food that has been engineered by scientists.
Right. To be very palatable.
They call it hyper-palatable foods.
Pizza.
Pizza.
Cool Ranch Doritos is like, the chief culprit.
Yeah.
I mean, it's not just like, taste good.
It's like, you never get enough.
Yeah.
And that's because it's manufactured that way?
And they have tried to make it, like, you know when, if you're in like a chip aisle, you wanna make the chip that people like the most.
Yeah.
So it's kind of dystopian, but it's kind of like, "Well, this is what their incentive is."
Right.
You know, they're trying to make the chip that you choose from all of the chips.
So they've designed the chip to be the best chip, and that means that I'm gonna really like it, which means that I'm gonna eat more Doritos than I should.
So that's a big part of it.
I guess you made it really simple.
I thought it was gonna be like a sugar addiction, but then you pointed out many examples that taste really good that don't have sugar.
Dammit!
Cool Ranch Doritos actually do have sugar on them.
Oh really?
They do, yeah.
They put a little bit of sugar on there.
They're so good!
Gotta mix that fat and that crunch and that salt and that sugar.
Yeah.
All that good stuff.
They figured it out.
There are other little effects here.
So sugar is a big thing where we, the more we have it, the more it reinforces that loop.
And you can get a kind of sugar dependence where your body's kind of always craving it a little bit, and that can actually become like, a physical thing with insulin resistance, where your body gets worse at figuring out how to respond to sugar.
Hmm. Okay. And that's bad for you.
Yeah.
And then, there's also some idea that like, with these ultra-processed foods, they're doing some things to it that is beyond just making them very good.
I think that the biggest effect is just that they taste really good, but that's kind of unsatisfying for people.
They want it to be about the chemicals in the food, but there are some chemicals in the food problems, like they can have like, emulsifiers, which can be bad for your gut bacteria.
Disrupt that system, which can influence how you want food. Do you think they could invent like, a cocaine, but it's cool, 'cause it's in food?
Like, like, you know what I mean?
Yeah, I mean, that, Coca-Cola was that.
Yeah!
And people were like, "I love this drink!"
Yeah.
"It makes me feel good!
And also, when I don't have it, I start to feel really bad."
So there could be something like that that we just haven't figured out yet.
That's a good point.
I think that if it was anywhere near as strong as the cocaine effect, we would've figured it out.
Okay.
But like, you know, have you ever had a little Feel Free?
You know what I'm talking about?
No?
What's a Feel Free?
Kratom? Is that how it's pronounced?
What the?
Am I the only- Are these drugs?
Man, Montana's different from LA.
Yeah! I suppose!
We got that gas station crack!
Feel Free!
Am I alone?
I've never had it.
Uh-huh.
But it's like a, it makes you feel good.
It's like a caffeine, but it turns out that it activates your opioid receptors.
Oh! Wow! And it should probably, and in a lot of countries, it is not legal.
But in America, you can just get it at the gas station, get it at the smoke shop.
That's crazy!
People like podcasters advertise it.
Oh my gosh!
Howie Mandel's out here, "You could Feel Free!"
Howie Mandel from my childhood!
Selling people weird- Childhood?
Opioids!
Feels like you're close to the same... Feels like, maybe like... I can't believe... You think I'm the same age as Howie Mandel?
Just, childhood?
It just feels like maybe you could be buddies.
No! He's like, he's like, 20 years older than me, and he was making this show called "Bobby's World" when I was a kid.
Oh!
My apologies.
And then when I was a teenager... Sorry, he asked for the teleprompter bigger earlier.
You guys missed it.
Oh my god!
(both laugh) So I was coming up with some assumptions.
Yeah!
What do I?
Okay, we're not gonna play, "How old do you think I am?"
Nope!
The games, we don't need to do that.
Deal or no deal?
Yeah!
Point at women and briefcases.
Yeah. Uh-huh. Yeah.
Women in briefcases?
No, they're standing, they're not in them. No, they're next to it.
But, if I were to guess Howie Mandel's age.
The women?
No, you.
(Hank laughs) Howie's 70 years old! He's 70?
Oh my god, he looks great!
(Hank laughs) Unlike some people on this couch!
Congratulations, Howie!
Wow!
That's a, I thought he was like, 42.
Okay. All right.
Well, I'm 45, so now we're, now everybody's doing great.
So now it's a compliment! Okay!
You just thought that Howie Mandel was 42.
Yeah!
Wow!
Congratulations, Howie!
He's been at it for a long, he's been in the game for a long time, and he still needs that Feel Free money.
So technically, that Feel Free could be a chemical called like, "blah blah blah" that's in chips, and we just don't know it.
I mean, I think that there, like, food is a really strong reward, and one of the problems with people who have bad relationship with food is like, it's not something that you can go cold turkey on.
Yeah. You know?
You need it!
It is life.
It is the thing that keeps you alive.
But you can also have a really unhealthy relationship with it, and that is, that is a tricky thing about food problems.
Another thing about food that tastes really good is that for almost all of our existence, it was, the food parts of the food was hard to get to.
Yeah. Especially like, a lot of it.
Yeah.
And so, you'd have to actually do a lot of processing to like, get the food away from the indigestible parts.
But now we're so good at that.
Yeah.
That we can just have the oils and the sugars and the proteins and completely remove all fiber, and that's bad.
Yeah. That is bad.
Fiber is so good for you!
Yeah!
But it was so omnipresent that we never evolved to enjoy it, because there was no way to avoid it.
I like it!
Okay, good!
How do you get your fiber?
I like beans.
Oh yeah!
I like greens.
Uh-huh.
And um, I'm out.
Jeans.
Jeans.
And jeans.
Yeah I just- Yeah, big one's greenie beans.
Yeah. Yeah!
Green beans? Green beans!
And greens and beans.
Yeah! And coconut has a lot of fiber.
Oh!
Sometimes I'll just get a coconut.
I supplement.
I gulp that metamucil every night.
And it's made life so much better.
But it's bad!
Oh no!
Yes!
It's bad because apparently, I've read this one time, so it's true.
Apparently, supplement fiber can grab your good, 'cause fiber grabs your bad cholesterol.
Yeah, yeah.
But sometimes, supplemental fiber will grab your good cholesterol, which is bad 'cause it leads to Alzheimer's, apparently.
Maybe.
TikTok said.
TikTok said.
So I was like, "Hey, you're right, Samantha."
Well, now I feel like we need a second Future Hank to tell you about that study.
(bright pensive music) Future Hank here, back again.
Past Hank has me working overtime this episode, but I'm doing it.
I went as far down this as I could, and I found, finally, a few little crumbs that somebody I think is over-interpreting.
Basically, there is a theoretical mechanism here, and it starts with how soluble fiber decreases the bad kind of cholesterol.
This is often pitched as it, like, binds to the bad cholesterol and carries it outta your body.
That's not really quite what happens.
Instead, it binds up bile acids, and moves them outta your body, and bile acids are made from a bunch of stuff, but your body makes them in part from that bad cholesterol, the LDL cholesterol.
And so, if you move more bile acids outta your body, the body has to make more bile acids, and that uses up that cholesterol.
And that is like the primary reason why fiber can modestly lower bad cholesterol.
But, if it's lowering the bad cholesterol, maybe it's also lowering the good cholesterol.
And we know that if you have low HDL, the good kind of cholesterol, then that increases your risk of dementia.
And that's a potential mechanism that's worth looking into.
The question is, does that mechanism play out that way?
And we can measure this.
When we look at soluble fiber supplements like cilium husk, like metamucil, the answer seems to be, there's not really much of an effect on HDL.
They lower the LDL a little bit.
The HDL generally does not move much.
But also, this is important, so you can look one step further down the line and say, "Okay, well maybe it does, maybe it doesn't lower HDL.
We should look at whether it increases your risk of dementia."
And there, the claim gets even weaker.
Overall fiber intake is clearly associated with lower dementia risk, not higher dementia risk.
Soluble fiber supplements specifically do not seem to have like a big protective effect on dementia, but they also do not look in any way harmful.
Now, insoluble fiber, like the kind that you get from eating vegetables and nuts and seeds, that is very good for dementia risk, so know that.
But soluble fibers, which is what you tend to get when you're taking supplements or when you're having like, a drink or a protein bar that has like, extra fiber in it, that doesn't seem to have a huge protective effect on dementia.
So what happened here?
Someone identified a plausible-sounding mechanism, and then people looked, and we found that indeed it does not seem to have a negative health effect, so we can safely ignore it.
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Hit us with another question.
You have the Pelican.
Oh, sorry.
It's so far away.
I can't move.
I'm scared for my mic.
Oh yeah!
I like this one! Okay.
Why do I need antioxidants if I need oxygen?
That doesn't make any sense to me.
Oxygen is a crazy molecule.
Okay. It's an element, but it is also a molecule.
So in the air it exists, two oxygen bonded to each other.
Okay.
And it is very chemically active.
It does stuff.
Most of the stuff in the air does nothing.
Nitrogen, nothing.
Argon, nothing.
Okay. Oxygen does stuff, and that's why we can exist, is because oxygen is chemically active.
Okay.
And we use that oxygen to turn the food that we eat.
She was talking about, into energy that makes it so that we're not dead.
Great stuff.
But it also, that chemical reaction, can go in directions that we don't want.
I have an experiment I would like to do.
Yay!
So what is this?
That is vitamin C powder.
Yes.
What is this?
Asorbic acid.
Ascorbic acid. Food grade!
Hmm, okay.
That is water.
That's water.
Uh-huh.
What's this?
That is hydrogen peroxide.
Ah, you know that one.
I know that one.
Okay, pour the hydrogen peroxide into the, into that bowl.
I'm gonna put some vitamin C into this one.
Can I get an apple, please?
And a knife.
This reminds me of like, this baptism thing they would do at the church.
I grew up Mormon.
Where they would like, have like a weird chemical, and they'd have it in a cup, and that was you before being baptized, and then they'd put in this other chemical and make it clear.
Oh! Wow!
A little bit of, a little bit of science.
Yeah, a little bit of science.
Little bit of mystical weirdness.
How much am I doing?
Look at this! This is fun!
That's, yeah that's, you can, you can do as much as you want.
Well I don't wanna waste it.
Okay, that's good then.
Okay.
So I've dissolved some but not all of this vitamin C in this water.
Okay.
Now we've got this apple, which, I'm hoping this is gonna work.
I didn't test this experiment beforehand.
Okay.
Oh, is this oxyge-, oxynga... We're gonna do oxigy-oxidi-dation.
Perfect.
We're gonna do some oxidation here.
Okay.
So we're gonna leave- Beautiful apple.
A little bit of this apple on the table.
I'm gonna take a little bit of this apple.
Did you come up with this?
Like do you, did you know that this was a thing?
Off the top of your head?
I think that I was like, let me think about that.
Yeah!
I was like, "Okay, what's a good oxidant?
Hydrogen peroxide.
What's a good antioxidant?
Vitamin C."
And then, "What's a good thing that oxidizes in air?
Apples."
Oh my gosh! Okay!
So, we're gonna take- What they say about you is true.
I'm gonna take this guy.
I bet other people have done this experiment.
You're a thinker!
We're gonna put this one in vitamin C.
And we're gonna put this one in this guy.
In the hydrogen peroxide, and we're gonna leave the middle one not exposed to anything.
And we're just gonna see what happens as we talk about this.
And hopefully, something will happen.
If not, we'll just cut this.
Okay.
Cool!
Yeah.
Do you know what kind of apple this was?
It's a gala. It should work.
Okay.
Certain apples don't brown now.
Have you noticed that?
We got like, apples that don't brown!
Because of the chemicals.
I don't know what they do.
No no no, it's like naturally!
Really?
I don't know if that's natural.
I don't know about all that.
Grows on a tree.
You took it off the tree?
I didn't take this one off a tree.
But like, the ones that don't brown, they don't, like- Steroids!
They don't put anything in there!
You don't know! I do!
How?
I have a friend who is an apple farmer!
Okay.
And he's not telling you, "I have a friend that's really buff, too.
He doesn't say anything."
He's like, "Oh, it's all natural!"
Like... (Hank wheezes) You don't know!
Your apple farmer friend could be a real big liar.
That's true.
You don't know what's in the soil.
I don't know what's in the soil.
Exactly!
Or, the air is less poisonous.
Better air.
And that's why it's not browning.
Question mark? So ox, so weird thing, oxygen is kind of poison.
Oh!
But it's also... Stressful.
The very life-giver, right?
Yeah.
But if you're supposed to take antioxidants.
Yeah.
What does it do to you?
So oxygen is like that, like that friend.
Okay. In your friend group who is like a ton of fun to hang out with, but also will absolutely explode things.
Oh.
You know that person? Is that you?
Yeah.
No.
(Hank laughs) Felt very pointed, but.
(Hank laughs) Not me.
Okay. Okay.
But I feel like you got somebody in mind.
Yeah. Uh-huh. Okay.
Yeah.
So, what can happen chemically is that the oxygen can actually split into two.
So it's bound together. Multiple personality.
It's bound together, pops into two, and what that does is, now you've got two super reactive oxygens that are on their own, called reactive oxygen species.
They might be bound up with other things.
But once they're free, they just like, bounce around, and they like, grab electrons off of things, but then that thing then is ready to do some chemistry, and that thing grabs electrons.
That's in me? From somewhere else.
And this can totally happen inside of you, yes.
It does not happen a lot, but it can happen, and it can totally happen to an apple, which would cause it to brown.
But it doesn't seem to be working.
(Blaire laughs) I wasn't gonna... We're just- It'll get there.
I think what's gonna happen, is we're just gonna like, let that sit until the end and see if it happens.
Yeah! We'll see what happens.
I don't know how long browning takes.
I was hoping that peroxide would make it happen real fast.
I'm surprised it didn't.
It's starting to brown.
Okay. I believe you. Yeah, I see it!
Okay.
And so the, like, the very thing that makes oxygen good for complicated life, which, we didn't have it, like we, earth didn't have it for a long time.
Yeah.
There was like a, a moment when photosynthesis started and it like, pumped all this oxygen into the atmosphere.
Like, a whole new system of chemistry had to evolve to use that oxygen to basically do photosynthesis in reverse.
So when a tree makes an apple, it's taking carbon dioxide and water outta the air, making carbohydrates, carbon dioxide and water.
Carbohydrate.
Okay.
It's hydrating the carbon.
Okay.
And then that, we do that in reverse, so it takes energy, makes carbohydrates, we like, take carbohydrates and make energy.
But that requires there to be oxygen out there for us to use to do it.
But we have to be antioxidant.
Like, we don't have to have antioxidants.
We have natural antioxidants specifically because these things happen inside of our bodies.
So our body produces ways to control these reactions.
But the idea is, if we added some extras, that couldn't be bad.
But like, could it not be?
Could you overdose on antioxidants?
Oh, for, you can overdose on anything.
Oh, right.
I'm confident in that. Yeah.
But in general, I think you're probably gonna be fine.
Okay.
But it also just seems like we don't, our bodies are probably handling these things pretty well if they're healthy, regardless.
Right. Okay.
And that this isn't like, the big thing that's giving us all cancer or something.
Antioxidants. Maybe it's a solution.
Oxidation Frick! (chuckles) Ah, I learned nothing!
Okay.
(Hank laughs) That's what I was hoping for.
Uh-huh, okay. Sorry.
It's okay. All right.
Oh, that was great!
All right.
Let's move the apples off and we'll see if they change color.
I think it'll work.
All right, what do we got next?
Next quebin!
We've got.
Oh yeah!
Freak!
This is a great question.
(Hank chuckles) Why aren't coupon mailers banned, and how do you un-sign up for them?
Oh my god, this was a great question!
I like, the, it's such a fun thing to do, because I get to learn all kinds of weird things.
So you know what the hard part of the mail is?
No.
(both laugh) Nope! I don't.
Like, the hard part of the mail, this makes so much sense that I would never guess it.
Okay.
Is getting the mail to the right house.
Oh!
Okay, yeah.
So, extremely easy to take a piece of mail and give it to a place.
Yeah yeah yeah. I agree.
Very hard to take a piece of mail and get it to one of a billion places.
That's correct. Yeah.
So that's where a huge amount of the resources of the post office goes, is not to deliver the mail, but to deliver the mail to the right house.
Okay. Uh-huh.
And that might sound like it's, it's just like, you gotta read the address right.
But like, you have to have like a stack of mail that's all for this one person, and then you have to have a stack of mail that's all for this one person, and you gotta get that sorted somehow.
So there's all this sorting that's going on.
Complicated. It's very cool.
It's very advanced.
But it's hard.
Coupon mailers are like, here's the situation.
One, this is America.
We have freedom of speech.
I can say whatever I want.
Okay. To people.
Including, "25% off at the furniture store."
Yeah.
So you can't tell me I can't do it.
I don't want it though.
Well, we're gonna talk about that in a second.
Okay.
But you're allowed to say it.
You're, so you're allowed to say, "I don't want this mail."
But the government can't say, "You can't send this."
So you can't make a law against it.
But the... Whoa! Okay.
The other thing is that these companies can say, "Hey, how about I pay you not anywhere near as much as it costs to send a letter, but you don't have to send this to a specific house.
You just send it to everybody."
They're in big mail pocket?
They're in big mail pocket.
And because this is so easy for the post office to do, they can charge them less than it costs us to send a letter, and they can still make way more money per delivery.
Oh my gosh!
So the post office makes a huge amount of money, and they use that money to subsidize so that it's cheaper for us to send letters.
Oh my gosh!
I did not know that!
So there's a, there's a whole system of these coupon mailers, and it's actually become a problem because they're doing it- It's like a mafia!
They're doing it way less than they used to.
Yeah.
And so the post office is making less money off of these coupon mailers, and so they're having a harder time, like this is not the biggest problem that the post office has.
Yeah.
The biggest problem is that the portions of the government think that they're bad.
And so they're, they're like, actively sabotaging the post office.
I didn't know that.
I know.
That's a separate conversation.
I thought, yeah. It's very weird.
Okay.
They're doing a bunch of stuff that no normal company would have to do.
But, the post office is a weird institution in America, where it's kind of a company, it's kind of part of the government.
They have a bunch of things that they have to do according to the government, which are difficult.
But, this is a way that the whole system is subsidized and it makes it cheaper to like, send a first class letter.
Right.
Because they don't have to do very much work to deliver these things.
Yeah.
Because they just, they don't even say, they don't even, you'll notice they don't send it to you.
No, yeah.
"Current resident".
Current resident.
Pissed me off.
Which means that they literally cannot mis-deliver it.
Yeah!
They give it to "this address".
Not "this person".
So how do you, you can't un-sign up for them.
So you can un-sign up for them.
You can?
So there's a few different places you can go.
We'll put them on screen.
This is huge.
And we'll put them in the description.
You could go to the places, you could say, "Don't send them to me."
Now you're going to individual companies, and so you're not gonna get rid of all of 'em, but you're going to individual places that do this, and they're the biggest ones.
You can also sign up for a service that costs money, it's not very much, that will do its best to make you get none of this.
I do think I would pay.
That's what the post office should offer!
Pay the post office to stop it!
Ooh, make the post office do it!
Yeah!
And then they'll keep, they get money still.
Yeah.
That's a good idea.
Thank you. It's a good idea.
We need to, we need to get the post office some new lines of business.
Yeah! I think that- What else should the post office do?
I feel like the post office could get up to some other business.
Some people wanna make the post office a bank.
Why?
Because it's like, there.
Like all the infrastructure is there, and if there was like a government-run bank that was basically, helped people who couldn't have a normal relationship with a bank because they don't have enough money.
Yeah.
They could just sort of be like a... Like a payday loan place?
But like, not terrible.
Okay.
But not as horrible, yeah.
Yeah.
Like actually not do the payday loan thing where you, but like, just be a good bank for people who otherwise don't have banks.
Okay.
That's not a bad idea!
So that's a thing the post office could do.
I think that like, we can make it into like, an escape room kind of situation.
Yeah.
Like they got all these PO boxes.
Maybe it should be like, you gotta figure out how to get in the PO boxes.
Yeah!
Or people love mystery boxes.
Mystery boxes!
So we should start, just like... Weird post office, 'cause they got into stamp collect, like, they like, make stamps now, and people like that.
Yeah. Yeah.
So maybe they should just like, branch out from there and do like, blind boxes of like... Oh, Labubu stamps? Eagles?
Yeah!
Yeah! (laughs) Genius!
Yeah.
That's a good idea. Okay.
I think they should do that.
In the comments, let us know how the post office should really, just make bank in this world.
They should be more successful than Amazon.
They do better stuff than Amazon.
They should be more successful than Amazon.
They're great!
Jeffrey Bezos saved the post office.
I wonder how much, for how long Jeffrey Bezos could fund the post office and make it free for everybody.
All of our problems.
"How could Jeffrey Bezos solve this?"
I think that's an actual, that's an interesting way to look at a problem.
Like, how many Jeff Bezos' worth of money would this cost to fix?
Yeah. I think we could get there.
I like that.
So that's the situation.
I was surprised.
No, I never thought that they would pay people, or that they got paid to do that.
The post office? Yeah!
I never realized. Oh yeah.
Oh yeah. That's so genius.
Well, they get, I mean, they gotta get paid to do all the stuff that they do.
Yeah, that makes sense.
Nobody can, nobody ships for free.
Yeah.
That's what they say.
Free shipping is free, but shipping isn't free.
You're paying for that.
You haven't met the parasocials then.
What's that mean?
You don't know what parasocial is?
I know what parasocial is.
Oh! But- Oh, shipping!
That kind of shipping!
Yeah yeah yeah. Okay.
I'm dating many a men.
Oh! Yeah.
It's very impressive.
(both laugh) I'm impressive.
And a few women, so.
Nice! Yeah.
I don't get shipped that often.
I think 'cause you're like... My people are very respectful.
Yeah.
I think you're like, the smart guy.
You're like, the smart guy, so they're like, "He's..." This is bringing up some bad memories from high school.
No, no no no!
No, no.
Well, I don't, "You're just so smart!
You're just like a friend."
No! Like they don't wanna pick on you!
Okay. Like, they're like, this is, like they respect- Oh yeah, that's my experience as well!
People never wanna pick on the smart guys!
Well the smart guy gets picked on when he's young, but when he's old, he's respected.
I mean, you're not old!
(Hank laughs) 70 years old, Blaire!
You're not old.
You're a very respectable age, but- That's also, I don't want you to say I'm of a respectable age!
You're hip and young!
And you're, you've got it!
That's what I thought. Yeah!
You're the huzz!
Oh, I can't be.
Oh... There's no way I could- Then you're not the huzz.
Possibly be the huzz! Okay, well.
I don't know what- You don't wanna be the huzz?
I don't know what that is!
Is that a thing?
Yeah!
You know so many words.
You said several words here that I do not know.
There's no way that has happened.
Yeah! Uh-huh!
I get them all from the youths.
Okay. I'm very tapped in.
Uh-huh.
I know that one.
That's from the seventies.
(Blaire chuckles) Yeah, the, it, well, so there's the huzz, which are the hot people.
Uh-huh.
So those are like, kind of like the fun way to say "the hoes".
Oh! But like, we've taken it back.
We own it now.
Oh, we're the huzz. We're the huzz, yeah.
That's entirely new to me.
But if you're ugly, then you're the chopped huzz, so you're a chuzz.
Oh!
And if you're old, then you're the chud, so the chopped unc.
Or the chunc, sorry.
The chunc.
'Cause I'm a chopped unc.
Yeah, sorry.
I may be the chunc.
But you could just be the unc.
Don't make yourself the chunc if you're not the chunc!
I mean, it's up to the people to decide!
Guys, let him know if he's the chunc in the comments.
(both laugh) You know, you're so mean to your wife!
Oh, that's an interesting, that's an interesting spin on that.
I do that all the time with people who are, you know, the old, "Don't be mean to my friend."
You know, being mean to yourself.
And it's like, well, like, how do you think I'd feel if somebody I know said that about you, what you just said about yourself?
That's such a clarifying.
Did I confuse you?
No, I get it.
Like you're saying, you're trying to like, but the thing is, my sense of humor, people like, Ludwig, I'll be like, "I'm so fucking ugly today," he'll be like, "Don't say that about my girlfriend."
I'm like, "Your girlfriend fucking sucks!"
(both laugh) Like, "Your girlfriend has attitude problems, and"- "That does not work on me!"
She's not funny, and she's, she's got horrible adult acne.
Yep. That's what I, when I think of you, I think attitude problems.
Adult acne. Horrible adult acne.
(both laugh) The categories I put you in. Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Oh boy! Yes.
I'm ready for my next one.
What's the next question?
Yes!
Yes. Okay.
"What is stopping a hipster from sending his discord kitten a carrier pigeon?
Why did pigeons stop carrying, and could they start again?"
So, we answered a similar question last season on this show.
So I can answer this very easily and quickly, but I mostly left this in 'cause I needed to ask you what a discord kitten was.
Yeah. So a discord kitten is, so it's like E-dating.
So electronic dating.
Oh!
We had that when I was young.
Yeah yeah yeah. Yeah.
Just on AIM, or?
Yeah.
Oh, IRC?
Oh! Is how I would... I don't wanna sound all slippedy lore right now.
IRC?
You don't know IRC?
No!
Internet Relay Chat?
I am old!
Okay.
Internet Relay Chat.
That's where all the huzz were.
(both laugh) Yeah, yeah.
So like, when you E-date, you often link up in Discord, and you'll like, watch a movie with your little discord kitten, and they call 'em a discord kitten 'cause they just sit there and they like, wait for you all day.
Why?
For when you're available.
'Cause they're just your little kitten!
Wait.
So first of all, does the discord kitten definitely exist as a physical human?
Yes!
Well, yes.
But I mean, sometimes it's a catfish, but.
Right. Okay.
Sometimes it is a discord kitten.
Okay.
Like, have you ever seen like, that guy that, like, on TikTok, and he's like, "Hewwo princess"?
Uh-huh.
He's a perfect example of someone who would have a discord kitten.
Okay.
Yeah.
But he's also a perfect example of someone that would try to teach a carrier pigeon, like, that's the thing!
Is I don't understand why people have just like, stopped, 'cause I feel like, you know how like, people smoke like, the long cigarettes, 'cause they look extra cool.
Like- No, but okay.
I don't text anymore.
I use a carrier pigeon, 'cause I'm like... Yes! So cool.
That's very hip.
You could just send a letter.
USPS.
First Class Mail.
Subsidized by the coupon company!
(Blaire laughs) Saved by Jeffrey Bezos!
(both laugh) Yeah. Soon.
Not yet, but maybe. Trademarked.
We'll see.
So, I have an answer to the question.
So the way that passenger pigeons, not passenger pigeons.
(Blaire chuckles) So the way that- They have like, mice on their back, and they're trying to save them on commute time.
So the way that carrier pigeons worked, and still work.
They still do exist.
Nobody uses them.
No, mostly not.
Though, here's what they do use them for.
And I found out about this on the episode.
Okay.
So you can get carrier pigeons, and what they use them for is that they release them at, like weddings and funerals, but then they fly back to the coop, so they like, know how to get home.
And they're actually, what they're called, is homing pigeons.
So the thing that they do, they do not go to a place.
You take them to a place, and they come home.
Okay. So that's all they can do.
Okay.
So you have to get them to like, understand where home is, and then you can take them further and further and further away, and then you can strap a message to them, and you can like, keep them far away, for a while, and you can strap a message to them and say like, "Okay, now I wanna send a message home."
And then you let the pigeon go and they'll go home.
So they can only go to one place.
They can only go to one place.
Ever? That's how they've always been?
Yeah.
And they only go to the place where they have like, been, like, accustomed to knowing as, like, where they live their life and get fed and stuff.
So did back in the day, they always had like a Paul Revere that would collect all the pigeons.
And bring them to a place.
Ding-dong!
Yeah.
And then like, then you'd send them back.
Yeah. Oh!
Yeah!
But that could work, for like, a long distance relationship.
For sure! That's trying to be- Yeah yeah yeah.
The kitten would have to have pigeons.
Yeah.
And then the E-boy.
Uh-huh. Yeah!
Would have to take the- That's good!
Okay.
Could have to- That was awesome!
Take the pigeons to his home, and then release them back, and they'd go to the kitten.
Okay. Yeah.
So... And it'd be very cute.
I just do it?
Ludwig's in the basement and I just drop a bird. (laughs) Like... Yeah!
Yeah, you can just use a chicken for that.
Like a rotisserie... (both laugh) Like a cooked one.
Okay!
That's good to know.
I think it'll step up my romance game.
Okay!
Imagine people are like, secretly cheating with carrier pigeons.
'Cause you know people have been caught cheating on Google Docs.
You swap the wrong one?
Yeah!
When you like, you send the pigeon you think's gonna go to your, like, kitten number one's house, but it goes to kitten number two's house.
Yes! Exactly!
Yeah. Gotta be careful!
Be careful with your pigeons.
How do you get caught cheating on Google Docs?
You've never heard of that?
No! (laughs) Dude, that's so crazy.
We live in different worlds.
I don't know!
I don't think so.
Well, I'm not saying that like, "Hey, like, I'm reminding you," I'm- Oh, so my world's bad!
I'm just realizing that as... Oh, okay.
You hate Disneyland.
Okay, cool.
Your world sounds great!
I'm not saying, I'm saying it's different.
I needed that.
Listen... How do you cheat on Google Docs?
I mean, obviously not... So, this is not, I'm not a cheater, by the way.
This was a big scandal.
Okay. That happened.
I won't, you can Google it.
I mean, it was, respect, she won't, it was LilyPichu.
LilyPichu got cheated on Google Docs.
So she was on a trip, and I guess instead of texting, 'cause you get caught texting, a person, her significant other and their person, they would just be in a Google Doc and type to each other and then usually erase it.
And it was a living Google Doc, but they didn't just do "add emails".
Anyone with the link could view it, and it got leaked, and- Whoa! Yeah.
So.
If they would've had a carrier pigeon, it would've been totally different.
Who got the link?
You can't just like, make it up!
I don't know what happened.
I think, 'cause they're all streamers, so maybe someone left the tab open?
Oh, yeah!
Somebody saw the tab and typed in the whole... Yeah!
String of weird letters at the end of the Google Doc. And then they got in there, and they didn't erase, or they did like, it was erased, but you have the history.
The histories!
Oh my god! That's intense!
Cheaters are crazy!
That's the kind of thing that the post office should be doing to make adventures for people.
(Blaire gasps) Yeah!
And they can pay to have the adventure.
Yeah, that's a good idea! Yeah.
Also like, I don't know, I think cheating the old-fashioned way, with letters, would be smart.
I don't know.
That feels easy to intercept.
Oh, 'cause then you have to burn it.
Yeah. Or, yeah, you can just... You're just like, opening your mail at your boyfriend's house.
Turns out I'd be a bad cheater, I guess.
Thinking, "I haven't put a lot of mental energy behind it."
Turns out I haven't put a lot of energy behind this.
Can you give me, just a sort of like, two sentence explanation of how the E-boy and the discord kitten would have this relationship, but in that voice that you used earlier.
(Blaire chuckles) No!
(both laugh) I would respectfully rather kill myself.
(Hank laughs) Mr. Green.
Okay.
No, thank you.
Okay.
Well.
It was worth a shot.
I've learned, that's one thing I've learned, is that the Internet's forever, and sometimes it really stresses me out.
Oh, man!
You know it!
I've made thousands of YouTube videos.
Yeah. That's crazy.
I don't care about, like, okay. I do, okay.
The biggest thing I care about is like, an ex best friend's mom, who like, loved and appreciated me, and she's like, "Oh, Blaire was so respectful, and she'd always come to the house and she'd make cookies and she'd bring fresh flowers, and dah, dah, dah."
And then they like, cut to me on my podcast, "Wine About It", where I'm like, "Oh yeah, and then in high school, (bleep) shoved a cell phone up her vagina so someone could call it," like, and then I'm like, "Oh my god."
You know?
That's part, I had so many vagina questions to ask you, but I didn't wanna ask them.
Oh.
'Cause I didn't want someone to think they were inappropriate.
Well, I'm also like, not the best authority.
What? (chuckles) There are more qualified people, probably.
Okay.
But I, you know, I do my best to admit when I don't know things, and et cetera.
You don't know how long a spider could survive in a vagina if it crawled up there?
'Cause I was curious.
You know, one time, there is a case study of a lady bug, who, I don't know if survived, but, like, went through and was discovered in a colonoscopy intact.
Whoa! Yeah.
I don't know if it was a alive in there.
Yeah, but vagina has different acids.
Oh, for sure.
A different situation.
It could destroy.
And I also wonder- But stomach is very acidic.
How much it could destroy.
Like, what level of bug- What can the vagina destroy?
Yeah.
What level of bug?
I'll let you work on that.
But also, what level of civilization?
Yeah. Yeah.
If you just shove stuff up there and it just slowly disintegrates.
Yeah. Yeah.
And how could you make your vagina more acidic, so eventually you disintegrate a man?
(Hank laughs) That's what I wanna know.
I'll look into it. Thank you!
Future Hank is not gonna take that one on, though.
Okay, Future Hank. Okay.
Pussy.
(both laugh) All right, next one.
Oh yeah!
Is there an actual (record scratch) purpose, what happened?
It was alive. It was a live ladybug!
In the colon?
(indistinct) has done the search.
Through the stomach!
This is great.
No, maybe it crawled up!
You don't know.
Great point, Blaire!
That's what I thought!
Thank you!
I immediately thought it crawled up.
I know!
I immediately thought it went down!
No, 'cause the acid in the stomach would kill it!
I think it would be way easier to get through the top than the bottom.
It's tight down there!
It depends.
It depends.
I'm just glad, like, I am, like, riding on cloud nine that we got outta that vagina discussion.
(Blaire laughs) And right into the next question, without me feeling very uncomfortable at all!
I also feel like period blood should be, have more purposes.
Like why should I have to get my blood drawn when I bleed once a month?
You should be able to test that!
Yeah! Yeah!
Yeah!
I should know what my cholesterol is once a month through that.
Absolutely!
Isn't that crazy?
Just put it, just like, have a sensor down there.
Yes!
Yes!
Sometimes with sensors... Have a single advantage over us.
Thank you!
Oh my god, oh my god!
Thank you! Thank you!
Jeffrey Bezos, fix this!
(Hank laughs) If you could spend $500 million on a boat, you can have a smart tampon!
Yes!
That tells me my iron.
Is there an actual purpose to being married?
(Hank chuckles) I was raised in the patriarchy, so I am unsure.
Oh, okay.
My purpose was to be that.
To, yeah yeah.
To get married and do the thing.
Yeah.
I'm a spinster.
Oh! Have you reached the age?
Definitely.
Oh, okay.
I think in my entire family, I have, so, I was raised Mormon.
My dad is one of eight kids.
I've got like, 80 cousins.
And I am the oldest unmarried- Wow!
And there are many beneath me that are young, and they are all.
Yeah.
They're all wed.
So I am, it's very dark.
(both laugh) I don't know.
But I just don't care for it.
Yeah.
Directionally different is okay.
Yeah!
There's all kinds of ways to live a life.
Thank you. You should be a bishop.
Is that what they say?
The bishops?
The bishop does not say that.
The bishop says get married.
Okay.
But I think the church could use some more bishops that... Right. Would say that.
So yeah, there's lots of purposes to marriage.
I really went down a rabbit hole with this question, because I was like, "What is marriage about?"
And then as, the more I looked, I was like, "Oh actually, this is an extraordinarily complicated question!"
If you look anywhere beyond, like, the last 50 years, like, especially if you look cross-culturally, like, a weird thing about marriage is that almost all cultures do it.
And have been doing it for a long time.
And when I look into why, it seems like, pretty clearly, a sort of very strong hypothesis in anthropology right now is that there's a bunch of reasons why marriage is valuable, but like, the biggest one is simply so that you can have more parents.
So like, when you, like when I married my wife.
Okay.
I got a second set of parents.
Okay.
And like, you know, human cultures, when generations were much more compressed, so people would be having babies earlier in their lives.
Yeah.
They'd be having more babies, and there'd often be like, parents and grandparents, and maybe even some great-grandparents.
It was just really valuable to have more potential support.
So you're expanding your potential support system for yourself, and for your children.
And like, that becomes a really important like, unit of a culture, of society, of a community, is like, this family group.
And the marriage was a way of sort of like, bringing those people into it, permanently and seriously.
Now this has gone every different direction that you could imagine.
So like, lots of situations where there's one man marrying many women, some occasional situations where like, one woman marries many men.
It tends to be much more based on role, as well.
So like, women would marry women, but usually that would be in a situation in certain societies where, like, one of the women was taking on a more male role in society.
I see. Anyway.
Okay.
There was like, but there's like, the point being, there's a billion different ways.
I read, like, three chapters of a book called "Marriage: A History", in response to this question.
Yeah.
And I would like to continue.
I'd like to finish it, and you should read it.
It's fascinating. Okay.
I bet you'll like, learn a bunch of stuff.
I haven't run into any Mormon stuff yet, but I bet there's Mormon stuff in there.
Yeah.
Now is the much easier question to answer.
So there's basically like, three buckets of purpose to marriage.
There's a legal bucket.
So if your spouse is in the hospital.
I feel like that's the only reason.
Yeah. I'll get to the other ones.
Okay. Okay.
But there's a bunch of like, good, legal, like we have institutionalized marriage legally.
And there are a bunch of actual advantages, because if you assume marriage is real, then like, society and the law is like, "Okay, yes.
You get these advantages," which is why, like, it's a really big deal if society is like, "Yeah, but those two can't get married!"
But why are we being nicer to people that have found their partner?
I feel like we should be nicer to the lonely people.
Absolutely.
We should have like a singles HOV lane.
(both laugh) Those are the people that need it.
Yeah. I mean, I'm not gonna say that it's the right way to do things, but it is like, the situation that we have at the moment.
It's weird that there's advantages for people that are happy and in love.
Well, maybe.
Yeah. (laughs) Okay.
Or maybe they just made an agreement.
It's a business transaction. 25 years ago.
That's what it feels like!
Okay, okay.
Yeah.
So there's also like, some social stuff here, which you may have encountered, where there's just like, when you say "my boyfriend", people feel differently than when you say "my husband".
I say "my discord kitten".
Oh, well that makes, that makes it much better.
That makes it very easy.
They take me very seriously.
Yeah.
So you're the E-boy in the relationship?
Yeah. Yes. Yup, okay.
Yes, thank you.
Can you gimme a couple sentence- No!
(both laugh) Nope! Nope.
And that's like, society-wide.
Right, right.
You know, there's just like, it smooths, and it conveys information very smoothly.
And there is like, no way.
I have, like, one of my son's closest friends, his parents are together but not married.
And like, it's just- Oh I see, I see.
Yeah.
So they've been dating forever.
They have a kid together.
They're just not married.
Yeah.
And they plan on, like, raising this kid together, and they, like, live in a house together.
And, but like, when I had the first, like, I was like, "When did you guys get married?"
'Cause we were just talking about me and my wife.
And they're like, "Oh, we haven't."
And it was like, just kind of, a little bit of social friction that's eliminated by the institution.
And then I think, really legitimately and honestly, as a married person, there are personal purposes to getting up in front of your friends and being like, "This person and I are gonna do this.
We're gonna make a go of it.
When we're having a hard time, we need you to support us."
Like, the hard parts are not gonna, like, immediately end this relationship.
Right.
Like, just doing that, having that ceremony be done, has been very valuable.
And like, making the choice, in public, and straight to the other person's face, and like, vows that you get to write and construct yourself.
But like- Right.
You get to say the thing that you believe is gonna hold true for the rest of your life or however you imagine marriage.
And then like, having that simplicity carried forward.
And we do see that people who are married, and this is so full of confounding variables.
Okay. So like, don't take it- Yeah. Super seriously.
But we see that like, on average, they live longer.
There's this thing I have seen where it's like, men who are married live longer, but women who are married live shorter.
That's not true.
That's just sort of like a thing.
Okay. Good to know.
But I think there was like a study in the seventies.
It's like a meme?
But it has since- People just jumped onto.
Yeah.
Okay.
And there's more wealth built, usually, in partnerships.
But this is- Yeah, 'cause it's two.
Really hard to see, because of course, there's like, all kind of other things that are involved in like, whether somebody's in a marriage.
Like, people are more likely to get married if they're healthy.
People are more likely to get married and stay married if they have money.
Yeah. If they have money.
Yeah.
Well, I guess my thing is, is like, doesn't that just make it harder?
Because like, a divorce is so much harder than a breakup.
Oh yeah!
That sounds miserable!
Well, yeah!
Yeah, yeah.
For sure.
Like, and part, like, almost by design.
Yeah!
And that, and like- So why get married if you're gonna like... Obviously, you don't get married to get divorced, but like, "I guess I'll just flip a coin."
I mean, you gotta get married because you think you might not get divorced.
And it's not just flip a coin, because like, it's that relationship.
Right. You know?
You could say that like, like for- Can you tell I'm cynical?
As a very weird- (Blaire laughs) As a very weird, I think that you're dating many different people, is what I've heard.
Yes. I'm... Someone's gonna actually believe that.
I'm just kidding!
I'm very happy!
I'm in a relationship!
I just, I have divorced parents, and I've got the whole shebang and- Yeah!
I mean, so, this is gonna be a really weird example, but like, half of people who, like around half of people who get cancer are gonna die of that cancer.
But like, 90% of people who get the kind of cancer I got are gonna be fine.
And so like- Right.
It's like- I see what you're saying.
You know, broadly, but like, think about your relationship.
Not about like, how things go in general, on average.
It just sounds like, it's just so much paperwork.
There's some paperwork.
But like, there's also a party.
Yeah! I can throw a party any day though!
I'm literally throwing one this weekend!
And it's great!
But like, my favorite thing about my wedding was like, seeing all of my friend groups together.
You know?
Seeing my high school friends hanging out with my YouTube friends.
Well, I wasn't a YouTuber then.
(both laugh) Okay.
But hanging out with my grad school friends, hanging out with my family, and like, all those people together.
In a place, like, like my life up to that point kind of captured in that way.
I think, this is my hot take.
I think you don't throw enough parties if you feel that way.
You're right. Yeah!
Absolutely!
In fact, I'm trying to figure out how to do that more.
Okay!
That's a thing I'd like to do more.
Yeah! 'Cause it sounds like you need to have- I had a friend say this to me recently.
"Entertaining is an amazing hobby."
And I was like, "That's the frame I need."
Yeah!
Like, I should be treating this like model trains.
That's how I treat it!
Yeah!
I do a dinner and I like, do themed menu cards.
Oh! I do a plan, I do a tablescape, and then we all watch "Beauty and the Beast" because we made a "Beauty and the Beast" themed, you know, it's fun.
I've never been invited. It's my hobby.
Oh!
Would you like to come?
I live in Montana.
Well, okay.
That might be part of it.
But that sounds- Let us know when you're in town!
Amazing.
We have a great time.
The post office should sell that.
How would they do that?
Just like the package.
What's the, but they can't send food!
No, like the, the themed menu cards.
Oh yeah, yeah!
All that stuff.
Yeah!
Okay. You know?
Maybe some decorations to go along with it.
Oh yeah!
They could become new... That paper place.
Yeah, whatever that means.
Yeah! Why don't they take over the paper stores?
Paper.
Yeah! Yeah!
That is weird!
The post office hasn't thought of that.
Yeah, just like, cute little stationery things.
Yeah.
I think that they do have sometimes.
They have little stationery things going on.
We don't even know enough about it.
And we're just like, we're like, "Do this."
One thing I'm not is the postmaster general.
Yeah.
Me neither.
But somebody is.
Somebody is.
And I'm sure they're questionable.
They're in the comments, actually.
They're pissed off right now.
They're so mad.
They're like, "No one understands me!"
One of the things I wrote on this is, "Why do you ask?"
But you kinda told me.
Why do I ask? Yeah.
I just, I think, I'm getting to an age where there's a lot of pressure.
Everyone's like, "When are you getting married?
When are you getting married?"
And I'm like, "What's the point?"
Like, we're great!
Yeah. It's fine!
I fear, once you do the song and dance, then it makes people feel trapped and it changes their, like, it changes something about them.
And I don't, that's where I, that's what I fear.
I don't want anyone to feel trapped.
Well, I think like, you have to look at the people, you know?
Yeah, I know. But like, like you should take your feelings about that seriously.
Well, I don't.
I just think, I've always thought this.
Yeah.
Always.
I just get, 'cause- Oh, okay.
Yeah.
'Cause it's also one of those things where you sit there and you think, "Oh, did I inherit that?"
Like, did I inherit that from like, like my parents.
'Cause they didn't work out, and the freakout, and... Totally. Yeah.
Who knows?
But yeah, that's my biggest thing, is I just, I think there's just societal pressure.
Also, after marriage, you get to start kissing. I've had for 10 years.
That's huge!
Yeah.
But kinda gross-sounding, so.
All right.
I'm not super interested.
All right!
QT, we have one question.
Okay. Left!
One left.
Is the medicine you read about saying that there are pills to increase your pet's lifespan real, and can I buy them?
Mm, mm. Mhmm.
So, no... Oh.
Probably.
So I, there's a bunch of different- Oh! Great.
Have you bought them?
So you're telling me my dog's gonna die.
I am telling you your dog's gonna die.
That sucks.
That's like, a hundred percent.
Okay.
Okay, all right.
Yeah, that's gonna happen.
But, looking into this, the weirdest thing that, I do think is kind of weird, is that there are no medicines to just make you live longer.
Yeah, that is strange.
And I'm not a doctor, and I'm not a biomedical researcher, and I'm not in the pharmaceutical industry.
But that is, it seems a little like, I feel like that's not a forever situation.
I feel like eventually, there will be a drug, or drugs, that are just like, "You should take this after a certain age, because, on average, people who do this will live longer."
I wonder if it's just vitamins!
Not because it's treating a certain disease.
It doesn't seem, doesn't seem like the effect of, of that is that big. Right. You're right.
Like, we've looked at a lot of those things.
But there are some medicines that, like, most people over a certain, like statins, which control cholesterol.
Yeah.
But that's about controlling cholesterol.
It's not really about longevity, and they aren't prescribed to everybody.
They have side effects.
This is another thing.
Everything has side effects.
Yeah.
And then like, the only thing that is like, recommended for all people over 65 is flu vaccines.
Like vaccines for- Yeah.
And that's like, that's kind of a longevity medicine.
Like, the flu does kill a lot of older people.
Yeah. So like, that does result in them living longer.
But that's, you know, that's, you would never consider that a longevity medicine.
But it turns out it's really hard to do this kind of research on people for a couple of reasons.
One, the regulations are strict.
Two, people live a long time.
So to see the result, it takes a long time.
And also, people have like, wildly varying situations, and you can't be like, "Okay, all of you eat the same food for the next 20 years."
Right.
But you can do that with dogs!
Right!
So you can say to a bunch of dog owners, you can say, "Okay, we're gonna give you this medicine.
You're gonna have the dog take it every, every however long," if it's an injection or if it's a pill.
And dogs live way less time, so you can see the effect sooner.
And if that's like, a year of a dog's life, then that's maybe like, seven years of a human's life.
I'm guessing.
Yeah.
This is the math that we do as people, but it's more complicated than that.
There is this company that's doing this, and it's really, it seems like, in part, a way to get to a drug for people.
But they're starting with the dogs.
But, as of right now, they're still in trials, and you can't get the medicine, and there's some good ideas for like, why this might have this effect.
Like, there's some mechanistic thoughts about how the drug actually works.
But we don't know if it works yet.
We don't know what the side effects are yet.
Oh, they're just talking about it.
Well, they're testing it.
Okay.
And so, the idea is that it will maybe be approved in like, 2026 or 2027.
2026, 2027.
So that's like, a year or two. Okay.
My dog's 14.
Oh, okay.
How big is your dog?
He's small.
Okay.
He's 15 pounds. Good.
So.
That gives you a little- Hold on, Swift!
That gives you a little time!
(both laugh) He's doing great, he's just- Okay.
Yeah. Yeah.
He'll make it, 2026, 2027. Yeah, but like, it is ultimately not a dog immortality pill.
Yeah.
So that- They haven't figured that out yet.
Yeah.
The veil approaches, regardless.
Interesting.
But I was interested to sort of think about that, from the angle of like, "Oh, okay.
I kinda see why these people are going for dogs," because it's just a lot easier to do that research on dogs than people.
That is interesting.
And they've done it on mice, and they see effects in mice.
And there are other things out there that we don't know if they work, that they will sell you.
As supplements.
Right.
And, well, do they work?
We don't know yet.
Yeah.
Have you ever tried them?
No! Because they're for dogs!
Oh, right.
Sorry.
I forgot.
I forgot about that.
Also I'm not 70 years old.
Right right right. Unlike Howie Mandel.
You're not, well, Howie Mandel, you should try the dog supplements.
See if they work out.
That'd be very helpful.
Stop taking the Feel Free, and start taking the dog pills!
Exactly!
Exactly.
Can we get an apple check?
Do we get an apple check?
How my apples lookin'?
Come on. Moment of truth.
Moment of truth.
(Blaire gasps) Ooh! (groans) Oh, they looked different for a second.
No, they look different!
They do look different!
Yeah!
This one is a little more brown.
This one is brown, and this one isn't brown!
There you go!
So something did happen.
Vitamin C stopped, so if, so is that why you put vitamin C on your face?
Yeah, so vitamin C like, can gobble up those extra electrons, and kind of neutralize the oxygen, make it stop doing its crazy stuff.
'Cause oxygen makes you look old.
It, I mean, aging is the big thing that makes you look old.
The sun. The sun.
That's what you really want, is to put sunscreen on your face.
A SPF moisturizer.
Right.
That's what my wife buys me.
And then it sits in my drawer.
Yeah.
And what does it matter?
I don't go outside anyway.
Yeah! No one's mad at you.
And I look, as we have- It's like the billionaires online.
As we have discussed, I look very young.
Yes, very young.
That was a joke.
Before everyone comes at me.
"She's being so disrespectful!"
I promise. Oh.
It's a joke!
Man, the internet, the internet's so hard.
They've done a lot to me.
Can you tell?
"Guys!"
"I've been injured by you!"
Yeah, please.
"I was jokin'!
I was just jokin'!"
Our new Sky Daddy, the comments.
The comments, yeah. Yeah.
They are more judgmental than God himself.
That is true.
QT, thank- I'm sorry. QT- Oh.
No, you go! Gotta stop talking!
(Blaire squeaks) QT, thank you for coming to "Ask Hank Anything", and asking your questions.
Thank you.
I've learned a lot researching them.
The world is complex and amazing.
I hope that you're not too stressed out.
It seems like, it seems that the world is a little bit out to get you sometimes.
Or at least that's how you feel sometimes.
I'm okay.
If you wanna ask me anything, you could leave comments.
I'm gonna be looking through those comments and picking out some questions that I like and I'll give those some answers.
You can also upvote any that you see.
If you see questions down there that you'd like me to answer- I'll go ahead and answer some too.
And QT, Blaire will also answer some questions.
If you want more "Ask Hank Anything", or more of the many other cool things that we do at Complexly, you can make sure that you're subscribed to the Complexly YouTube channel, right here at youtube.com/complexly.
(bright pensive music) Thanks for watching.
You can support Complexly and get bonus videos from "Ask Hank Anything" and more by going to complexly.org/support.
Also, if you wanna see more of what we're up to, you can join the Complexly newsletter by visiting complexly.org.
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