The Confidence Secret Entrepreneurs Won't Tell You | Meshell R. Baker #social333podcast #123

Added: 2026-05-27

[00:00:00]Hey, welcome to the Social 333 podcast.

[00:00:02]I'm your host Chris Bentley. Today my guest is Michelle Baker. Michelle, how are you? I'm fabulous. How are you today? Awesome. Tell the audience a little bit about yourself and what you got going on. Oh, my name is Michelle Baker. I'm known as the chief confidence igniter. My gift is empowering self-belief and I am just having a blast right now. Um I'm working on a book that will be launching mid-year. Um working with some awesome companies. Uh headed to Detroit later this year and you know, working out, possibly going to Germany.

[00:00:32]So really looking forward to doing some great things with some incredible clients and people. Talk to me about the self-belief. Um is it more of a like a confidence thing or is it more of just uh an ego thing? Tell me about it. Yeah, so it um I Thank you for asking that question. Um when I say self-belief, it is um really truly believing in yourself. It's not based in ego. It's actually believing in that you are a gift. Like, you know, so we've heard it said by so many people that we all have something unique and different to give the world. And I believe that when you tap into what's already inside of you, you will stop being so troubled, bothered, distracted, delayed, and dissuaded by external circumstances and people. So that self-belief is a routine and a practice I help people establish, equip them, encourage them, and empower them to establish so that they are determining their own destiny.

[00:01:32]Tell me a little bit about your book that you're coming out with. Ah. So it is my methodology. So in and I'll say the book has been done for I think 6 years. It's been sitting in a Dropbox folder and I don't know why. I just kept telling myself I was too busy and I'm not ready yet and I'll do it later and it's time. And I It's It's really utilizing what I've experienced and what I you know, the practice that I take my clients through to establish that habit of believing in themselves. That's actually uh one of my coaching programs that's uh called total transformation. That's the guarantee that I give them. You will have the habit of believing in yourself or I'll give you all your money back. And I've never had to give it back.

[00:02:19]Wow, that's pretty cool. Yes.

[00:02:21]Huh.

[00:02:24]Talk to me a little bit about I know you put this in the questions, which I thought was really interesting. So you overcame some obstacles. I know we all have as entrepreneurs.

[00:02:32]>> [laughter] >> Um We were just talking about that earlier.

[00:02:35]It's like Wizard of Oz and they go through like the whole Tony I don't know if you've ever watched a lot of Tony Robbins, but I do. Um you go through the whole thing of the cycle of you know, Alice in Wonderland. Yes.

[00:02:48]Yes, so um I've had many obstacles. The one I that comes to mind is um when I was younger, um you know, I was not raised um in the best. My I believe my parents did the best for who they are. I love them and adore them. There's some things that transpired because of um one of the gentleman that was in our, you know, house for a lot of period of time was alcoholic and did unsavory things. So it just shredded my confidence. I was very smart. I was gifted. People knew it, teachers knew it, and I just like stepped off the deep end. I just, you know, started acting out, lashing out, getting in trouble, and by the time I was, you know, 20, I was incarcerated.

[00:03:27]Wow. And um it really changed my life.

[00:03:30]Um and what it did for me was I was headed that way and I believe I would have ended it up there at some point and I'm glad it happened early. I'm glad it happened when I was young, when I still had a lot of energy and drive and right, not a lot of behind me. And what it did was it gave me a a trajectory, a target that I started practicing. So my first target was don't go back. So then I assess, how do you not go back? You know, they call it recidivism. Recidivism. I'm not going to say that word correct. Right? Y'all know what I'm saying.

[00:04:03]>> [laughter] >> All good.

[00:04:05]Right? So that was, okay, then how do you not go back? You get a job. Okay, so then it's you get a job. How do you keep a job? Right? So that's the other thing.

[00:04:15]Well, I noticed there's two people that supervisors generally keep around. One is the person that generally kisses up, right? And the other person is the great worker. Well, the the the kissing up sent seemed too tenuous, right? Because if they liked you one day and didn't like you tomorrow, that wasn't going to work. And the thing I knew that would last is doing great work, right? No one can take that from you. So that became my mantra. I would show up early, stay late. I would befriend my supervisor, manager, whoever it was, and I always understood what their deliverable was.

[00:04:49]And no one told me this. I just kind of figured it out because I showed up early, stayed late, paid attention, asked questions, and was truly interested because my driving focus was to stay out. And that offered opportunity. So what I started experiencing was what I will call angel mentors. People are always watching and this is what most of the population does not seem to understand. Someone's always watching you and you are always performing and you're creating your opportunities based on your performance.

[00:05:23]Right? And they forget that. So I was always awarded up you know, advancement, um you know, stretch opportunities, pay increases, promotions, and it just kept moving until I when I did figure out what's happening, then I started doing it intentionally. Hm.

[00:05:43]I want to go back a little bit. So I know for myself I didn't have a great childhood. They did the best that they could, right? And then uh Alex Hormozi and Tony Robbins and something Alex told me or I wish he told me, but uh I would love to get him on the show. But uh something that I watched was really good it was that cuz I was stuck in a pattern of not necessarily regret, but um you know, like always looking back on my childhood and then sometimes I would blame. I'd be like, oh, that's the reason why like I'm this way is because of Alex, right? And Alex Hormozi like kind of really said it really elegantly, which was, hey look, like we all have a past life which we, you know, our and our parents did the best they could to raise us.

[00:06:31]And if it was a bad situation, it was a bad situation.

[00:06:34]Um but that was then and and we're now, right? So like kind of pointed towards the windshield and you got the big windshield and a small little mirror that's in the back, right? Looking at behind you.

[00:06:47]Um I think a lot of people that even I've spoken to, you know, like uh entrepreneurs, business owners, they've had bad, you know, relationships, bad childhood, Yeah. and it's helped them propel them in life as long as they realize that that was their childhood. Yes. And now that I'm an adult and I don't need them, I can go and make my own decisions. Yes.

[00:07:12]>> And I think it that's what that screwed me up for a long time because I was always stuck in my head. I was thinking like if this would have changed or that would have I I can't go back in time.

[00:07:21]And so a lot of I just know that a lot of other people are in the same boat until they realize that hey look, like you know, I can't make any changes anymore. I'm an adult.

[00:07:30]I have to figure it out on my own.

[00:07:32]Um which is really, really good. It just I always just notice like patterns um where like you just really strong entrepreneurs always are like that where they had just a, you know, terrible childhood and then they end up, you know, figuring it out, beating the odds. I mean, even when you get into uh you know, we had a gentleman that was on the show that uh got into drugs and alcohol cuz his parents were drug and drug addicts and alcoholics.

[00:08:02]And he ended up in jail a bunch of different times, went to prison a bunch of different times and like he talked about his journey, which was a wild one.

[00:08:10]But I mean, now that he's an adult and he's, you know, doing his thing. He's got a daughter. He's got, you know, life work balance, all kinds of stuff going on.

[00:08:19]Um you know, you can change, which is which is a really good thing. Yes.

[00:08:25]Uh talk to me about your nonprofit, which I thought was really interesting.

[00:08:29]Okay, so it's not me my nonprofit. I'm the chair of the board. It's uh NFTE, stands for Network for Teaching Entrepreneurship. So this is near and dear to my heart and I love how I came about. Um I was doing a presentation and NFTE was one of the sponsors at the event and I was telling people to dream big. I have this, you know, big acronym.

[00:08:51]I'll talk about it later. Um and the person who was on um the board actually said came up and said, my dream is that you would serve on the board cuz I had told the story of how when I was 13 I had three businesses. So my dad was uh my dad is the son of a sharecropper and he had a business when I was growing up and it was um cleaning. So he did janitorial work, but he did um 20% of his work was cleaning office spaces, like, you know, buildings. 80% was cleaning up new construction. That's was his money, his meat, and he was amazing at it. Um and so I worked with him a little bit when I was younger, but and I wanted to do this. So when I was 13, I had baking, babysitting, and sewing cuz I can sew to tailor. Something that they used to have all the women in our family. It was a requisite. You must learn to sew. And um And so that was my idea, but my mom got remarried and in that remarriage stuff started happening and that's what changed my trajectory.

[00:09:53]Hm. And it just changed my life. So when Nifty came around, which serves under privileged, you know, under resourced school districts, I was in because I know what can happen when you have a mentor. I didn't have a mentor. I had these businesses, they were making money, they were doing well, and the only thing that happened was the adults in my life kept taking the money. Nobody was helping me with a business plan or a bank account or anything like that, or, you know, I kept getting orders and it would getting and it became overwhelming. And, you know, as Biggie says, more money, more problems, right?

[00:10:28]So, if you don't have the guidance and the advice, you will you'll it's just as bad as if you don't have it, right? So, if you you have money or don't have money, you need advice, you need wisdom, you need insight. So, I I love helping these young people change the trajectory of their entire life so they don't they don't have to go around and come back.

[00:10:48]They can go straight to success.

[00:10:50]I you know, while you were speaking, I remembered something about the angel's part.

[00:10:55]Um And that's so true. So, like whenever I was working at jobs and stuff, I always had Man, I don't know how I can explain this. We just talked a lot about religion on the last guest, but I don't want to go even deeper. But, uh I always feel like there's someone somewhere that's like in your kind of like your presence to help you, right? Like an angel kind of idea, right?

[00:11:20]>> Yes. Um but that person is I don't know man, I don't know how to explain it.

[00:11:27]It's it's almost like a grace, right?

[00:11:30]And um I've experienced a lots of graces and you don't really know what it is until you put like a name to it.

[00:11:41]So uh Tony Robbins was talking about this whole scenario where he was like dead broke and like he gave a bunch of uh he had like $17 and he gave $10 to this one guy that needed it and then he didn't have a way home, so he ran. He only had $7 in his pocket and he was he was like I think uh living in a very small apartment and about to get kicked out, living in a car and stuff. And I've been in that situation, too.

[00:12:05]And like a check come like he get a picks up a phone call and his friend owes him some money and then his friend give him the money back plus some interest and stuff like that.

[00:12:14]And he was like, man, like this is crazy. Like I was, you know, I only had $7 and now I got like this check. And I've been there before, too, where I was just like, man, I don't know where any money's going to come in and like, man, like this is it, you know? And it's tough going to sleep when you know like this is it, you know? And I always slept okay more recently cuz I knew like, you know, God always got me, right? But I would always just be like, man, like, you know, I really need like this is it, you know? Like you have those moments where you're like, this is it, like after this I'm cooked. And then uh I got a check and it was a direct deposit like a whole bunch of money and I was like, oh wow, like Yep.

[00:12:55]And I was like, you know, and I didn't do anything stupid. I'm older now like you know, when I was younger I'd probably be like, oh, let's go like, you know, buy a bottle, right?

[00:13:03]>> Right, let's party. Right, but I'm a lot older now. I'm like, okay, well, like, you know, I got to go get some groceries.

[00:13:09]>> [laughter] >> I know, pay some bills.

[00:13:12]>> Right.

[00:13:13]Um Exactly. But yeah, there's a lot of that uh where there's just kind of angels around you at all times. I just talked about like being in the hospital. Um and I could see I'm very into spirituality as well, but I could see like how somebody like really cared. Yes.

[00:13:32]>> You know, and I had nurses come through and some nurses like, you know, they cared enough, but like some nurses like really cared. Like I had this one nurse that um I think I don't know if I was getting like my blood drawn or something was happening. They were sticking needles and stuff in me and she like sat on the corner of the bed like just watching me like this.

[00:13:53]And you know, like as a guy I'm like, damn, this girl must be really into me, but I'm like >> [laughter] >> but inside of my head, too, I was like, no, like this this person actually really cares from her heart. Ah. And it's not you know, anything more than that. It's just she just really care And it was it was weird, too, cuz she wasn't supposed to work that floor.

[00:14:14]Like the floor that I'm in, she wasn't supposed to work that floor. Like she's she's always upstairs and she had to her assignment was to work that floor. Yeah.

[00:14:22]Or the floor that I'm on. And I was like, man, this is really weird that you know, this is going on and she's supposed to be up there and tonight was her only night that she she's like, I rarely work down here. I don't know why they put me on schedule like this.

[00:14:37]And I was like, man, this something is up. Um and grace is just a a wild thing.

[00:14:42]Yes. Most I right now we're in a society that does not have grace for themselves because you can't give grace to others if you don't have it for yourself.

[00:14:52]>> Mhm.

[00:14:52]Right? It's something that it's like patience. You won't be patient with other people if you're not patient for yourself. Everything that's helping it happening outside of us is a internal reflection. Um our, you know, mentality is our reality, right? And >> Yeah, it's a mirror and none of this is taught. Like just think about how different our world would be if we, you know, instill this. And people this is what people need, right? You know? The reading and the writing doesn't help.

[00:15:19]What helps is your ability to master your emotions, your ability to um be kind and gracious to people when they're struggling, your ability to say no and sacrifice because this is not the best decision right now and it's not something that's going to take you on a path that will lead you to some place you really want to be and you're going to be proud of and happy and fulfilled with. None of that's taught and that's why most of our population is struggling.

[00:15:47]I think it's also gratitude.

[00:15:49]>> Yeah, oh goodness. The younger generation has no gratitude and I grew up in a uh I'm 48, so my mom grew up during the Great Depression. Mhm. And my grandparents like, you know, struggled through that whole thing, right?

[00:16:06]>> Yep. And um I know a lot of people probably laugh at this, right? But she would make uh food and she would pour like, let's say cereal and she pour like half a box of cereal.

[00:16:20]Or she'd make oatmeal and pour like half a tub of oatmeal.

[00:16:24]And then she would eat like two bites and be like, okay, I'm done. And I was like, well, why did you pour so much stuff out?

[00:16:30]And she goes, oh, well, like, you know, my generation we just throw food away cuz it's like so abundant. And I was like, well, my generation like you eat you pour, you eat. Like there's no any of that kind of stuff. Clean your plate.

[00:16:42]And I was like, I don't know where this where this happened. And she's like, well, like you know, we were born and we have the internet and phones and abundance. Like if we want something, we just go down the street >> Yes.

[00:16:55]>> fast food or like we go to the grocery store and there's it's there. Um or I order it on DoorDash, you know, like and somebody delivers it to me. Yeah. It's just or I want to go drive somewhere and somebody becomes by and picks me up.

[00:17:07]Like it's just it's so much different for younger generations to understand grace or generosity or uh blessings anything like that because they've never No. Their idea of hardship isn't the same idea of hardship that like I was with my >> service. Hardship is there's no cell service. Right. Yeah, it's just or like my food didn't get here fast enough or there's no oat milk in my latte or whatever, right? It's just and I see this stuff and I'm like, man, this like I'm grateful that at least I had $5 to buy that cup of coffee, let alone like if they put oat milk or regular milk in like Yes. You know. And and there are, you know, some parents who are intentionally doing things to help their kids and still like in the like you said, the values you're talking about, the grace, the patience, the gratitude, right? The integrity. Some people are being very intentional because they know that's going to be the game to those are the those are the young people who are receiving those they'll be the without that.

[00:18:15]>> Right. No, I agree. Right? And that's the challenge, right? When you think about what's happening and this is why I love what I do because I mean, I'm seeing I one of the things I say, adults ain't adulting. Mhm.

[00:18:26]>> Right? Most of our adults are not emotionally equipped to handle big change, right? Um something traumatic happens in their life, whatever that is, most people fall apart.

[00:18:39]Or they lean into stuff that they shouldn't get into. Exactly. And that comes when you actually are, you know, believing in yourself, you would believe that you can handle anything that comes your way. There's nothing outside of you that will dictate who you've decided to be internally.

[00:18:58]Talk to me about some pitfalls that most entrepreneurs that you've seen kind of stop their momentum, maybe stop their success. Um I know we just talked about a bunch of them, but maybe not so much in the spiritual and Christian realm, but more of the day-to-day. Yeah, the practical. Saying yes is one of the things. I mean, I I fell into it. Um so, there's the FOMO. We don't hear that term used anymore, although it's still practiced.

[00:19:28]>> Right. Uh fear of missing out. And it's happens cuz people will say, oh my god, you should have been there. And I'm like, no, I shouldn't have been. I was exactly where I needed to be. I actually will say that to people because I understand my unconscious mind does not uh stop. It does not have a boundary for what it hears.

[00:19:45]>> Mhm. Right? And it will come back. Like it will show back up. So, I protect what I hear and what I read and what I see, right? So, yeah, FOMO, doing too many things that aren't aligned. So, and that comes with having a daily practice, right? We see the most successful people have a morning routine of something where they are [clears throat] investing in themselves, then they invest in who they've decided to be, and then they go do things.

[00:20:11]Right? So, that's the that's the way.

[00:20:12]So, I see that can be challenging is that, you know, misalignment for activities and then doing what's comfortable. So, one of the things I find interesting, so I work with um Shift Co. It's a business growth business community It's a community conscious a business growth community for conscious entrepreneurs. It's called Shift Co and I teach authentic selling.

[00:20:37]And and really what I see when the people come in, they're, you know, these conscious, purpose-driven, mission-driven entrepreneurs who don't like sales. Right? They don't like doing the sales activity. They don't They then they talk about their feelings and they're deterred and distracted and then I remind them, when you got a paycheck, you went to work no matter how you felt.

[00:21:00]Time to start working for yourself like that. And many of them have never had anybody reflected back to them like that. Right? You get to choose. So, choose activities that you enjoy and then you create activity then you set yourself up for resets because you know, if you're doing things, it you may eventually start to have that feeling.

[00:21:21]Learn to reset because feelings aren't real. They're not You're the master of your emotions. And that's what most, like I said, because that's not a conversation we're having, most adults aren't able to deal with it. And they start getting into the habit of doing what's comfortable and we know comfort does not generally lead to any great success.

[00:21:42]So, this is going to come off as really funny and maybe a little upsetting, but I've interviewed a lots of not guys, but like real estate agents trying to come on board with me or loan officers and stuff like that.

[00:21:57]And Alex Hermosi has it right, but and you can chop it up however you want, but you have to work at least 4 hours of your day just on outbound like prospecting, right? Whether it be uh A to B or B to C, however you want it, right? Or B to B, whatever business to business, right? Um I just look at it more He has like a whole quadrant of it, right? Like but you have to work on it. Whether it's your creative, whether it's talking to your warm market, whether it's talking to cold market, which I'm really good at. Uh whether it's creative, whatever it is, um you have to work those hours.

[00:22:38]And usually what I see is and I was guilty of it for a little bit till I learned some discipline, which is I think a a really big thing in this business, is and just in general in life is that people would be like, "Okay, I got my license."

[00:22:55]Kind of like when I got my diploma from school, right? From college. I was like, "Ah, got my diploma. I look at it and I put it in front of a newspaper back then when there was like newspapers, right? Right?

[00:23:06]And then like I'd be like, "Okay, jobs come to me, right?"

[00:23:11]>> [laughter] >> Just kind of like mysteriously call me.

[00:23:16]I'm waiting, right?

[00:23:18]And like we both are laughing because like that doesn't happen in real life, right? Like you can't put your diploma on the newspaper and then expect people companies to start calling you, right?

[00:23:29]It's the other way around, right? You have to start calling. So, like a lot of real estate agents or loan officers or whoever it is working in sales, let's say, right? Uh entrepreneurs, whatever it is, right? You got to be able to sell. And they're like, "Okay, cool.

[00:23:43]Like I've got this great product or I got this great service, whatever it is."

[00:23:47]Awesome.

[00:23:49]I'm going to put that right right there on my computer screen. We're going to lock it in and then people will just start calling me. I'll get the emails, offers >> [laughter] >> for my great product.

[00:24:03]Yeah. The reality of that is zero. Zero.

[00:24:07]Yeah. Yes. I I was on a sales panel for NSA earlier this week and one of the women was her her her genre of success or expertise was follow-up. Yeah. Right? And she talked about the biggest part.

[00:24:24]>> Yes. And she talked She get She dropped a stat and I and I wrote the stat and stuck it on my laptop as a reminder that 80% of 80% of sales professionals, and I I say business owners are sales professionals because if you own a business and you're not a seller, you're not in business, right? So, 80% make um three don't don't make more than three follow-ups.

[00:24:51]So, she said, "If you want to flip that, then the flip is that only So, yeah, only 20% of people make more than two make more than two."

[00:25:06]So, I think I hope I did that correct did that justice, but yeah, it's I know what you're talking about.

[00:25:10]>> Yeah. Is this people just don't They don't follow up. And it's and and there's a various reasons. She talked about fear, want not wanting to be pushy, right? And having And so, it all goes back to mindset. Decide who you're going to be. And most business owners don't invest in themselves. The And I've heard it said, "The best investment you can make in your in in your business is yourself."

[00:25:32]>> Yep.

[00:25:33]I have two stories. Uh I'll wrap this thing up.

[00:25:36]Um So, just yesterday, I closed a guy that's been looking for a home for 2 years.

[00:25:46]2 years. Do you know how many showings that is? That's a lot.

[00:25:50]And I closed him.

[00:25:53]I also got a listing from a guy that was a lead, never heard from, and I called every probably like every Monday and Thursday for 6 months.

[00:26:06]And guess what?

[00:26:07]I got a call randomly. "Hey, you've been calling me. I'm ready to sell my house.

[00:26:11]I don't like my other realtor."

[00:26:13]Guess what?

[00:26:14]I sold his house. And then he bought three more houses. See? There you go.

[00:26:20]So, when my agents are like, "Ah, I called and emailed and text them. They didn't answer me."

[00:26:28]There you go.

[00:26:30]The guy that bought a house was a million bucks.

[00:26:32]The guy that I ended up selling his house was close to a million. He ended up buying another house that's almost close to a million.

[00:26:39]And then he sold that house, I listed it, and then sold it again, and then he bought another house. See?

[00:26:43]He's one of my best clients. Best clients.

[00:26:46]And it's the persistence pays off. Yep.

[00:26:49]Yeah. And that's that's not a quality that and and I'll tell people, I didn't learn it growing up. I didn't come from a bunch of persistent people. I didn't come from a bunch of patient people. And one of the things that I mentioned was investing in yourself. That's what I learned, right? Um I think and I'll share this uh like at one point I was a sales rep, pharmaceutical sales rep, and I was the best rep in the territory.

[00:27:12]Um and our manager Our company was bought, so they merged. So, they was a remapping. Mhm. So, all of a sudden, there was a he had a 100% new territory.

[00:27:22]And guess who got And the 100% new territory was 30% to quota. Wow. Guess who got it?

[00:27:28]I did. Nice. And I see, at that time, I didn't think it was nice. I thought I was being punished. I remember crying.

[00:27:35]Yet, at the time I had a boyfriend who was like, "What's wrong with you?" And I was like, you know, you know, snotting and everything. He was like, "But you're the best, right?"

[00:27:46]And I said, "Yes." He was like, "Who Who else would he give it to?" Mhm. And he was just so matter-of-fact, no judgment, no what's wrong with you, you know what you have to ought to. And that and and I was just like, "Oh." And it just changed my whole perspective going forward from there.

[00:28:01]And it made absolute sense. And I grew the territory. I did exceedingly well with the next one as well and and everything. But in it comes to people don't realize, everything we want is on this other side of some difficulty or challenge you're either complaining about or you're scared of.

[00:28:16]>> Mhm. Alice in Wonderland. Oh, yes, exactly.

[00:28:19]>> [laughter] >> True.

[00:28:21]Very, very true. True story.

[00:28:24]Michelle, if somebody wanted to get in touch with you, learn more about your upcoming book or any speaking or maybe your group or nonprofit She didn't nonprofit. Yes. Where would they find you? They could find me at Michelle baker.com or you can find me on LinkedIn and I'm at Michelle You'll add the R for all my social media tags. So, it's, you know, Michelle R Baker. And my website, you you go there and it says meet me and you can go schedule something, send me a message, and I would love to have a conversation. Michelle, appreciate you being on the show. Oh, thank you, Chris.

[00:28:56]This has been awesome. Awesome.