Nene, Thainess and Why Western "Confidence" Fails in Thailand: The AGT Reality Check

[00:00:00]tiny. And I noticed something that I think westerners missed and you even see it in the title that America's Got Talent put for N's clip there.

[00:00:11]16-year-old Nene Royale is shy until she starts singing Zombie. What I saw going out on stage there, even from the beginning, wasn't shy. It was just Thai tinness orai.

[00:00:34]Today's clip is going to be in English.

[00:00:46]So, the reason I just did that in Thai is because I put a clip out yesterday about this same topic, tiness. And I noticed something that I think Westerners missed. And you even see it in the title that America's Got Talent put for N's clip there. 16-year-old Nene Royale is shy until she starts singing Zombie.

[00:01:15]What I saw going out on stage there, even from the beginning wasn't shy, it was just Thai. So, I started my clip yesterday in Thai like this.

[00:01:37]STICK IT UP BEHIND THE HITMAN. BRET HART. LOOK AT THE KING IS OUT.

[00:01:41]AND HER hearten blue American.

[00:01:58]Wait a minute.

[00:02:02]And I know it was a bit tongue and cheek and I know that WWE, WWF wrestling in the US, it's all staged and fake and there are real fighting challenges.

[00:02:14]There's a UFC, there's real boxing, but I put it there for a reason. Last week, after the original NaNer clip came out, America's Got Talent put a compilation clip out of many female artists from all over the world in the Got Talent series, and N was the first clip.

[00:02:38]Now, the clip after N was a 17-year-old girl named Mia Morris.

[00:02:57]Wow.

[00:03:09]Is >> that cool?

[00:03:10]>> Is that cool?

[00:03:13]And just seeing these two performers there juxtaposed not only in their performance but in the interviews leading up to it and after it. It was a masterclass in understanding Thai culture, Tess and the difference between Thai and say Western American culture.

[00:03:35]And it also mirrors much of the stuff that I see western companies, westerners, western governments doing wrong when coming and living here or working here or trying to do something in Thailand or with ties. So, I'm going to hit today's clip from a different angle than yesterday's because that one was showing ties the difference between what they already know with maybe what's normal in Western or American culture.

[00:04:04]Today we're going to look at it the other way around and I'm going to analyze through a Thai lens for you and explain some stuff that may just seem like second nature to any Thai but may be very foreign to a westerner and then also how this may feel seeing western behavior to a Thai. This is what I've been doing in Thailand for almost 30 years now, being a conduit between Western and Thai culture. And yeah, actually in my book, Cracking Thai Fundamentals, it's called Installing a Thai Operating System for Your Mind.

[00:04:41]Learning the Thai language is not enough. I used to work a lot with the US military and other militaries around and people might get their DPT, that's the defense language proficiency test, to level three. So, they're practically fluent in Thai, yet they would hit the streets of Thailand and when they speak Thai, it'll be like a fart in an elevator. Nobody wanted to stay around to listen to them. And it's because of the software running under the hood, not just the language on the surface. So, if you are learning Thai or you want to know more about Thai language and culture, get a copy. If you're in Thailand, you can click on the link in the description below and it'll be sent to you via EMS. Otherwise, you can get it on Amazon. And I have a whole section in there on Thainess and how it's realized through the language and just everyday life in Thailand. But let's get into the review now. So, first thing I'd like to say is please don't shoot the messenger. I'm just telling you what I know from living within the Thai culture. actually for most of my life now. And if you really want to know whether what I'm saying is a load of crap or not, go and look at the comments from my clip yesterday in Thai. And I'm sure Google will translate it for you, but you can see whether they think the way that I'm saying now or not. So, first of all, when you see this image here of N, this was just after she performed. What what does that tell you?

[00:06:14]What are the signals that that sends out? So, just keep a snapshot of this as we go through it and I hope that this is going to let you see some stuff that maybe you didn't realize before. First of all, let's just look at Nene's introduction onto the stage.

[00:06:32]>> Hello, how are you? What is your name?

[00:06:34]>> Okay, did you see that little wave there? It's like hi. You might think that that is shy. There's a thing in Thai we call. What does that mean? Well, imagine this. This is my own version of what it means. You've seen those Indian goddess statues with all of the hands.

[00:06:52]So imagine when you're born onto this earth and you're born about with all of these hands flailing around.

[00:06:59]And those hands, I want you to think of those as representative of who you are to the external world. So they're the sound of your voice, the way you look, your hair, the smell of your breath, your body odor, the way you smell, everything about you that can potentially have an impact on the world outside of you. And so what means is imagine a snail and it's got its antenna. What happens if you touch the antenna? It sucks in, right? And so this is think of this as the action of now putting that over the image of this goddess with all of the arms flailing.

[00:07:42]And those flailing arms are all of the things that you have about you that could potentially interfere with someone else. Even if you think it's a strength, if it could be construed as something that would annoy someone else, well, it's better to your day. Your dye is your mind. And again, the mind for a tie is here, not here. This is just a a piece of gray matter to process data.

[00:08:10]You exist here, not here. Okay? So, you're this is your Tai and you're pulling in everything about you that could potentially have an influence on other people in a positive or negative way.

[00:08:25]Just because you think your confidence might be good for you, maybe someone else is going to feel bad, so you don't go out and show it too overtly. This is And so you see all of this behavior here is N's interpretation of and she's doing it subconsciously. It's just the way that people are.

[00:08:48]>> How are you? What is your name?

[00:08:50]>> My name is Na N.

[00:08:52]>> Okay. What is your name? My name's Na N.

[00:08:54]This is a very normal interaction in Thai. And she's being polite.

[00:08:59]>> Um, I'm 15 years old and you know, tomorrow is my birthday, so I'll be 16.

[00:09:04]>> Okay. So, and just look at that. I'm 15 years old and tomorrow I'll be 16. And she's just happy. She wants to interact, but she's not going there trying to. We say in Thai, y means to lift. H is your tail. And so she's not out there just waving her own tail for everybody to see. We have another saying in Thai [ __ ] sounds pretty good if you're an English speaker. You get to say that last word [ __ ] [ __ ] is not a swear word in Thai. What it means is means sharp like a knife. The point of a knife. N to keep in. [ __ ] is the sheath or scabbard.

[00:09:46]So what it means is you keep your sword in its sheath until you really really need to use your weapon. Otherwise you do not show the weapon that you have.

[00:09:59]And so she's just keeping [ __ ] her sword in its sheath. She doesn't have to go out and telling people how good she is, how amazing she is. She's just being nice smiling. And the reason Tai is smile again we have 12 different words for smile only two of them are probably positive but you smile because you don't want to cause this negativity which could bring bad karma on other people so you keep the smile so just keep that in mind as you're watching this >> start playing guitar since I was seven >> okay now this is important n has been on stage I think her dad said like since she was eight or nine she was out there busking Okay. And so she's been on stages, but she's never been on a stage this big.

[00:10:49]And also, she doesn't want them to lose face. So, have you been on a stage this big before? Oh, I've been on stages before, or I feel confident. That one in N's mind would make her not look great.

[00:11:05]And she sees that Sophia Vagara is wanting this to feel like something special that she's here. So, she's letting Sophia feel like this is something special, and it is probably the biggest stage that she's been on. She's been on stages before, but yeah, this is the biggest stage. So, listen to her response now given that.

[00:11:24]>> So, it's the first time that you're in a stage like this.

[00:11:26]>> Yes.

[00:11:27]>> Yes. It's the first time I'm on a stage like this. It is the biggest stage, but she's been on stages before, but she doesn't want to go and say, "Oh, no. I'm actually used to being on a stage. I'm on a stage every week." It wouldn't be to speak like that.

[00:11:41]>> Are you a little bit nervous?

[00:11:44]>> I'm very nervous a little bit, but like you know what?

[00:11:46]>> Okay. And again, are you a little bit nervous? She doesn't want to say, "No, I'm not nervous." One, it would look bad. It would be Yukhang herself lifting her own tail up and it wouldn't be. And she sees that Sophia wants to make her feel comfortable and she's seeing that.

[00:12:05]She's saying, "Yeah, I'm a little bit nervous." But then you see her say, >> "It's my dream to be AG, >> but this is my dream to be AGT." And the way that she says it just brings everybody in. So, is she nervous? Yeah, she's probably nervous, but she also knows how to work a crowd. And that started to show even without her intentionally saying it.

[00:12:24]>> Who did you came with?

[00:12:26]>> So, today I came with my my father.

[00:12:30]>> And look at that. Today I came with my father and she's there and her dad's there and her dad has basically been the engine that's driven her and helped her from the very beginning. Go back and listen to some of those interviews from last week that came out uh with uh N and her dad and it's really touching to hear that story.

[00:12:52]But it's because of him that she's standing on that stage along with a whole bunch of other people. It's not just her. And so everywhere she goes, she just raises her dad up because of the sacrifice that he's made to let her achieve this.

[00:13:09]>> He's very supporting me.

[00:13:11]>> Okay. So he's very supportive of me. We have a concept in Thai that comes from Buddhism. Uh it's called katan. And so every kid born, whether you agree with it or not, feels that there's this just a a moral obligation, a debt to their parents for them having looked after them. And so she is very much embodying that spirit of ganu to her father.

[00:13:40]>> Thank you >> for you. Go ahead.

[00:13:42]>> Thank you.

[00:13:43]>> And thank you again. And this is it's not a sign of being shy. It's just the way that you are to be pleasant and keep everything light because you are.

[00:13:55]But then watch what happens. We all know what comes next.

[00:14:01]And look, thank you. She even thanks the stage hand. This is very, very Thai.

[00:14:06]Now, as she starts, look at this. And she even mentioned in a clip, we have a concept in Thai. They say long. Think of it like a spirit descending on her almost like a possession. So she gets on stage and long she becomes this performer.

[00:14:29]Look at that. Look at the dad. Look at her. That is so Thai. Now, of course, it's that juxter posing of this gentle, nice, sweet, smiling young girl that's just turning 16. She's 15 in this clip to this monster on stage. Not only is she a monster, she's got the chops, that guitar riff coming in and her voice, and you listen to her as she goes out. It's not the voice of a 15year-old. She doesn't have to tell people that she's good. People are just feeling it in here. All the hairs are standing up on everybody's arms. I'm sure it happened to me every time I listen to this clip.

[00:15:22]>> Okay. And we know what happens next. She just does what I think is one of the most amazing performances on America's Got Talent ever for one of these auditions. It's a masterclass in how to perform. She rolls it out, but she's got the chops. She's got stage presence. She gets the crowd going. Her guitar ability is amazing. Her vocal ability is amazing. And again, she talks about how she realized that her vo vocal level wasn't where it should be and her dad said, "Oh, you want to go for voice coaching?" Yeah. And she went there because she knew she would need it. And she really applied herself and did it.

[00:16:06]Go back and have a look at the interview of her.

[00:16:09]>> And look, she goes back to thank you at the end. This sweet girl.

[00:16:15]>> And she even wise, now we call this ponu. putting your hands together and why.

[00:16:22]Again, in Thailand, you there's a whole science to whing. The way that you why will tell a lot about you, your where you are in society and um your level and how you respect, who you respect, whether you think it's correct or not.

[00:16:37]This is just how the system works here.

[00:16:39]And so the general rule of thumb is you why people who are above you, who you are thanking, who you are showing gratitude for. And look at that. She's there on stage just why thank you again.

[00:16:52]She's putting herself under them here.

[00:16:55]>> Howie >> in a good way.

[00:17:01]>> Look at that.

[00:17:01]>> Oh yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. All the way. Yes.

[00:17:06]>> 100% yes. Thank you >> again. Look at that. She wise. This is tiness.

[00:17:15]We call it on nom. You're lowering yourself. There's a saying in Thai.

[00:17:21]Basically, the full rice stem, if it's really got full rice, it starts to bow down. And so, you'll know the ones that are actually really full of real grains of rice because they're actually bowing down lowest. And so you see there, she's like going down. Thank you. She's really, really grateful. So now take that snapshot. Here's Mia Morris. All right, everyone. Okay, first of all, look at that confidence. She's there spinning those sticks looking. She's got a look of determination. You can see actually she's got red makeup on her eyes. Now in the West, this is a sign of strength.

[00:18:04]if you're out there, you got to be the best and you got to let people know it.

[00:18:07]And she's there. So there's nothing wrong with her doing this.

[00:18:12]But contrasting with that whole Thai concept of it's the opposite. When people from the west come to Thailand and actually lots of other places in Asia and approach things like this, it doesn't go down the way often, the way that they would hope. But just let's watch this.

[00:18:35]>> Look at that. She's really good.

[00:18:37]>> It's time to see some talent.

[00:18:39]>> What's your name?

[00:18:40]>> My name is Mia Morris.

[00:18:41]>> Okay. What's your name? My name is Mia Morris. She's very confident from the get-go. Look at that smile. Uh and then let's see what she does.

[00:18:48]>> Mia Morris. And your name?

[00:18:50]>> Oliver.

[00:18:50]>> And who's performing? I see you at the mic.

[00:18:52]>> I'm >> You are performing. And Oliver, >> I'm here to carry gear. He's my roadie.

[00:18:57]>> I'm here carrying my gear. He's my roadie. Now I know western culture is different and the parent child relationship's different. She's joking around about her dad. He's my roadie.

[00:19:10]That would probably never happen in N's situation. N knows her dad has just worked and sacrificed everything to get her there. Even the school and getting a scholarship and just he only made a few thousand Bart per month. Yet he did everything to be able to put her up there and you know he'd be driving out there no matter what the weather was and even now over to the US with her everything has been for her. So saying oh he's just my roadie would within Thai culture and that concept of katanu be a disrespect to the dad. Now I know in western culture it's not and it's probably a nice warm fatheraughter relationship but to a tie this would be a little shocking. Here's your roadie.

[00:19:57]>> In the flesh. Yes.

[00:19:58]>> Here's your rodi in the flesh. Yes. So, for a tie, it's a little confusing seeing this. Is it right? Is it wrong? I don't know. It depends what culture you're in. But if you're coming to Thailand and you show this kind of behavior, Tai's maybe a little takenback.

[00:20:21]>> Are you guys related?

[00:20:22]>> Yeah, he's my dad.

[00:20:24]>> Yeah, he's my dad.

[00:20:25]Paw. It's like, yeah, to a tie that would be quite shocking.

[00:20:33]>> Are you ready?

[00:20:33]>> Can't wait. She's gonna be great.

[00:20:35]>> Can't wait. She's going to be great.

[00:20:37]Now, her dad, kudos to him, just like Kun N's dad, he's very supportive of Mia, his daughter. Though to the mind of a Thai, they're maybe thinking, what?

[00:20:48]She's just being this disrespectful for you, and you're just sitting there and taking it. All right, we'll go.

[00:20:56]>> Okay. Hey, you saw when N got up on the stage and it's very on nom we call in Thai to come out and do this from the get-go would be this yang actually even in Australia.

[00:21:12]Australia is changing but I think it's a very maybe American thing. I don't know if Brits would do it, but to really come out with this smile on your face like that, even in Australia, you might think it's a little weird. In Australia, I don't we call in Australians, I'm sorry to the American brethren out there, but we call it a have a nice day smile where it's almost, you know, it's it's not really what they're thinking, but they know it's what they've got to do.

[00:21:41]America is a tip culture. We didn't have tips in Australia when I was growing up.

[00:21:45]And so, you know, you worked a service job and you got paid your salary, nobody would tip. But in the US, you know, you got to smile, you got to be pleasant, you got to be checking on, you got to have this demeanor whether you're having a crappy day or not. Have a nice day.

[00:22:00]And so, a tide looking at this would also maybe feel that way that, you know, just a nice smile like you saw genuine, but maybe this is a little more of a have a nice day smile.

[00:22:15]Welcome to America's Got Talent.

[00:22:17]>> Thank you. Again, she may be sincere, but to somebody not understanding the American culture may think that that thank you was just maybe a little bit insincere. Thank you. Thank you. Maybe I'm being a bit too harsh, but don't shoot the messenger.

[00:22:34]>> What's your name?

[00:22:35]>> My name is Mia Morris.

[00:22:37]>> Hi, Mia Morris.

[00:22:38]>> My name is Mia Morris. See the strength in that? Mia Morris. That's what you need to do in the west or in the US if you want to succeed. You got to be out there and she's doing it. If you did that in Thailand like this, it might have a different response.

[00:22:55]>> And how old are you, Mia?

[00:22:57]>> I'm 17. Junior in high school.

[00:22:59]>> Where you where you?

[00:23:00]>> I'm 17. Junior in high school. Almost like she's wanting you to think, "Wow, you're really young." And she's sending the message. She's telegraphing what you're going to see is beyond my years.

[00:23:15]Again, maybe I'm being a bit of a dick, but to a Thai deep down, they'd be seeing this and thinking, "Okay, yeah, whatever."

[00:23:25]>> Junior in high school.

[00:23:27]>> Where you where you from?

[00:23:28]>> In high school, >> Nashville, Tennessee.

[00:23:30]>> Obviously, you go you go to school.

[00:23:32]>> I do, unfortunately. Yes.

[00:23:33]>> Unfortunat >> Okay. So, obviously you go to school. I do. Unfortunately, this is another big thing. this whole thing of we call it respecting from the word ki in Sanskrit there are things that I mentioned that you that you respect there's a hierarchy knowledge education religion we call in tatahakasat so you've got country religion the monarchy and then education religion all of these things are held up almost at a godlike level. You don't speak down about education to the point that supposing you're walking well one and anything that's of any value. So supposing you have a bunch of books and you need to open the door. You would never just put the books on the ground to open the door. You'd find a place to put the books up high because those books are holders of knowledge. They have value. Even if it's not stuff you're interested in, books are valuable. If you got a bag, you know, a good bag, you've probably got books and things in it. So, you see a lot of Westerners and they get on the train, the BTS here, and they'll just throw it on the ground or they'll walk into an office and throw their bag on the ground. And ties are Oh my goodness. If you go into a restaurant here in Thailand, they actually have bag stools that they'll come and they'll bring and they'll let you put your bag or whatever it is that you have of value, whether it's actual financial value or metaphoric value like knowledge or education, books and things to put on that because it shouldn't be down on the ground.

[00:25:15]Imagine this. Everywhere we walk, there's toxic sludge kneedeep and you're just winging through this sludge both physically and metaphorically. And so the general rule is that you don't want to bring something from down low up high close to the holy of holies, the head. I know I'm getting very philosophical here just from a statement from her about education, but just stay with me. So for you to speak down about education is putting something that is holy down in that toxic sludge you whether you like your school or not you don't speak down about the concept of education >> I do unfortunately yes >> unfortunately >> you're not enjoying school >> school >> see schoolmai to hear that and if you understand the undertones of school in English ties would be like who is this person?

[00:26:16]It's the ultimate of disrespect. Now contrast that with N. Have a look at what her dad and N have to say about education. I put this in the clip yesterday, but just have a listen to it.

[00:27:15]Okay. Okay.

[00:27:19]Ah >> both of them see that from the very beginning an education is the only thing that is important for her to be able to move ahead and from that she'll be able to develop English skills, musical skills, she can go out and even now that she's hit this point she's still focusing on her studies outside of the music because of the value that she puts on it and she's got a scholarship and so she wants to make those people proud.

[00:27:48]proud too because she's worked so hard even to get the scholarship and she wants those people who gave her the scholarship too and all of this help to be proud of her to give them a good name. That's all part of this tinus thing.

[00:28:03]Compare that to this.

[00:28:04]>> It is what it is.

[00:28:05]>> It is what it is school. It is what it is. It's it's very different. And again, she's in the US. It's her prerogative to be like this. And it's probably accepted. Maybe she's seen as this, you know, too cool for school. That's part of the act that they want to put up there. Market her like that and maybe it's good. So, who am I to judge? But from a third party perspective, if you have this kind of demeanor and you come to Thailand or you're wanting to work with Tai or actually anybody pretty much across Asia, this is not going to go down well.

[00:28:42]>> Live without it, you know. I could live without it. You know, again, maybe it's just the act, the whole persona that she's selling.

[00:28:52]That's funny.

[00:28:53]>> And what are you going to be doing for us tonight?

[00:28:55]>> So, I'm a songwriter.

[00:28:57]>> So, I'm a songwriter. So, N writes songs, too. But she didn't say that.

[00:29:04]But, okay. This is what she's doing. And she's actually going to do one of her originals. So she's telling them >> I'm going to be playing one of my songs, but I'm also a >> but I'm also literally yang raising her own toe tail up.

[00:29:18]>> Multi-instrumentalist.

[00:29:20]>> I'm a multi-instrumentalist. So she's just set it out there. No [ __ ] here. No sword in its sheath here. She's pulling a sword out for everyone to see what an amazing sword it is, even before she shows us how she uses it. Um, and I'm >> Yes, you can cheer. I'll give you a few seconds for you to cheer me back and then I'll continue.

[00:29:46]>> I know I'm being a dick, but don't shoot the messenger. Okay, you probably shoot me for that one.

[00:29:53]>> I'm playing as a onewoman band.

[00:29:55]>> I'm playing as a onewoman band.

[00:29:57]>> How do you play as a onewoman band? How do you play everything >> with this here? Loop pedal.

[00:30:02]>> Oh, looping.

[00:30:03]>> Okay. And so she goes on to teach them about the loop pedal. I think that's enough of this initial part, but let's just see then how she plays. Does she live up to the expectations that she's just told the world that she is okay? Couple of things. She's got buzzy notes. And that note just there was off.

[00:30:32]It's out of tune.

[00:30:40]Buzzing notes.

[00:30:42]It's just in a different grade to N. I'm sorry, but it just is. N's her chops.

[00:30:50]You listen to her just do Eddie Van Halen's solos note fornotee or Metallica solos note fornotee and she's singing at the same time with these insane techniques. That's n and then you listen to this. Okay, maybe it's nice for, you know, a pop song, but it's nothing that somebody who hasn't learned for, say, 3 months couldn't do.

[00:31:17]>> Wow.

[00:31:26]It's interesting.

[00:31:29]She's a little bit pitchy. It's an interesting sound, but she's building a loop up. Let's hear that.

[00:31:42]>> Your daddys lo >> your daddy thinks I'm a loser. It's her bad girl attitude. I get it.

[00:31:56]So again, she's singing down about your daddy, which fair enough. It's it's the image. It's a cultural thing, but to a tie, this wouldn't be something that you would do.

[00:32:16]>> I got a bad reputation.

[00:32:19]like the rest of my generation.

[00:32:27]And she goes on Oh, she's a good drumstick catcher. She didn't tell us that first that. So, I guess that's something. But it's very different. Okay, I'm sorry again for being a dick, but it's just really, really different. Maybe I've lived in this part of the world too long. This is very, very different culturally from what people in this part of the world in Thailand and I guess across Southeast Asia and even all of Asia experience.

[00:33:06]And so coming back to it, why did Nene go we say Rabbat? Why did she go viral all over the planet?

[00:33:15]It's not just a case of her being a good guitarist or being a good singer. She had stage presence which was amazing. I think that contrast was because for the first time people are used to seeing, you know, if you're going to be out there performing and seeing in Hollywood, you got to be out there really sort of pitching yourself, selling yourself. And we're seeing this really refreshing, just nice and gentle person coming in, friendly, sincere, and then bang.

[00:33:45]It's like she's possessed and her skills are off the chart to most people that we see from anywhere. And then she just goes back to being that same person.

[00:33:55]That contrast you're seeing is Tyus.

[00:33:59]That was we call it the Madame, the black horse in all of this. And I really hope that Na as she goes places with her career that she keeps this factor about her. She keeps her tyness and learns to integrate it with the international stage that obviously she's going to do amazing things on. So I hope that was a good insight into Thai culture and tess or what we call Thai. Don't shoot the messenger. If you are living in Thailand, just learn and try and just embody some of those things. If you haven't got a copy of Cracking Thai Fundamentals, the book, get a copy. You can order it on Amazon or if you're in Thailand, click on the link in the description below and I'll send you a copy. And also, there are online resources there. And if you want to learn in person in our group, we have not just Thai, but we mainly focus on tonal languages, but languages from all over the place. We've got people from all over the world. We meet four weeks on, four weeks off. We got years of content in my Minecraft program. You can come and join that. You'll find the link in jacademy.com too or in the description below. I'm really excited about what's happening with N. I can't wait to see her next time performing on the AGT stage. Thank you to all those people who have clicked like and subscribe. Like if you haven't yet, you can do that now. Other than that, I'm Stuart J. Raj. I'll see you on the other