Wood

Added: 2026-05-13

[00:00:04]It isn't Kyle and Chad. The best marketing jewel ship this company's had since Ariana. Good women, bad marketers.

[00:00:11]>> What can I do for you two gentlemen?

[00:00:13]>> Well, Mr. Tyonderoga, as I'm sure you're well aware, number two pencil sales have been falling sharply in the past year.

[00:00:18]And not to mention half of Washington has big ink in their back pocket. Damn straight, Chad.

[00:00:28]>> Right. Uh hm. Enough of that, gentlemen.

[00:00:30]I don't pay you to tell me about my problems. I pay you to fix them.

[00:00:34]>> Well, you're in luck because Kyle and I have launched a brand new ad campaign that will bring the number two pencil right back to the front cover of Writing Instruments Weekly, where Dammo belongs.

[00:00:45]It's simple. It's elegant. It's real.

[00:00:47]It's sexy. It's masculine.

[00:00:51]>> It's raw. It's passionate. It's woody.

[00:00:58]No, I I meant about the pencils.

[00:01:00]>> No, no, this is about the pencils. What?

[00:01:05]>> Um Josh, the lights.

[00:01:12]>> Okay.

[00:01:14]Okay.

[00:01:16]Well, I don't know about >> I uh have a lot of questions.

[00:01:25]>> I'm thinking billboards. I'm thinking TV. I'm thinking museums, >> right? But I mean, what happened to the pencils?

[00:01:33]>> What do you mean?

[00:01:35]>> Well, let's see. Uh, fine, fine, fine. I guess. Uh, no pencils. I'm >> Well, we've got more. That's right.

[00:01:48]We've got another big yellow goal like this.

[00:01:50]>> I hope so.

[00:01:54]>> Okay. Like this. Oh. Very nice. Well, I mean, >> you two are marketing geniuses. I won't deny that. But, I mean, this clearly has nothing to do with pencils. If I didn't know any better, I'd say the two of you were just trying to live out some kind of homoerotic fantasy.

[00:02:17]>> Hey, so you think you know more than us? Um, well, we just graduated from Cal Poly and we were co-presidents of Alpha Alpha Sigma.

[00:02:32]>> Yeah. So, with all due RESPECT OR ALSO WE ALSO I WOULD NEVER SAY ANYTHING. I I love the Mormons. I I think Mormons are great.

[00:02:59]DELIVER US FROM EVIL. AMEN. OH, SO YOU MOCK US?

[00:03:02]>> DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU MOCK US?

[00:03:04]>> I GUESS WE'RE ABOUT to find out.

[00:03:16]really I don't want it. I DON'T WANT IT.

[00:03:22]HE'S RIGHT.

[00:03:23]>> HE'S so You're not gay.

[00:03:29]>> But maybe I am.

[00:03:32]>> Oh, Lydia Maxim.

[00:03:36]>> All right, enough. Enough.

[00:03:40]All right, I'll give both of you one more chance or you're both going in the sharpener.

[00:03:53]>> We won't let you down.

[00:03:55]>> We'll see.

[00:04:02]This is nice. Well, okay.

[00:04:06]I can go. Oh my OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD.