"No More Moving In Together..." Men Say In New Relationships, Everyone Needs Their Own Space To Live

追加: 2026-05-18

[00:00:00]When people meet each other, >> what was your li What's their living situation? I'm living on my own, you living on your own, right?

[00:00:06]>> Yeah.

[00:00:08]>> So, what why why do it have to be different is what I'm saying.

[00:00:11]>> Women are not going to want to think about the women of today. You think they're going to want to get married and and not get the benefits of men of a man paying most of the bills? Think about that.

[00:00:23]>> What when I'm saying it, I think I'mma be honest with you. I think that I don't think that the the we talk about men having their freedom, >> but I look at it kind of sort of like how women don't don't talk the way that men talk when it comes to relationships.

[00:00:41]Like like men tend to be more transparent with how they moving.

[00:00:46]>> Women are less transparent with how they moving nowadays. is is changing a little bit, but like you'll never see a woman super honest about how many men she's sleeping with. Like you'll never be you'll never see a woman super honest about and I'm and I'm not I'm not gonna say too much about this subject because it's another we got a um you know a video for this that's going to lead us in a different conversation. But like I I think women are the ones that also want their personal space. I was listening to a woman on the live stream today that somebody sent me. They're like, "Check out this live stream." And it was it was an innocent live stream.

[00:01:23]She wasn't saying nothing crazy. But one of the things that she was saying is when she go over a guy's house, she don't like spending the night because she uncomfortable >> cuz she's what?

[00:01:34]>> She's uncom she's uncomfortable.

[00:01:36]>> Yeah, I can understand.

[00:01:37]>> Then what's what's the point?

[00:01:39]>> I understand.

[00:01:39]>> What's the point of the relationship?

[00:01:40]>> Think about it. like like things that we don't really care for >> cuz you know like people got habits and people they don't want to use the bathroom from front of men and [ __ ] like that. Like women want their own space to be able to be whatever they gonna be so that they can like so they can prepare to be with the person that they gonna go and visit.

[00:02:02]>> I mean so a woman is comfortable enough to open her legs to a man but not do other things.

[00:02:10]What I'm saying is >> I think women if you listen and pay attention to how because I pay attention to how things are evolving. If you listen and you pay attention, women are they want to live on their own.

[00:02:25]More and more women today are saying that I want to be able to live on my own but I don't want to be by myself.

[00:02:33]Is that basically >> they want companionship but they don't want to have to share spaces with men.

[00:02:40]>> So they want a man's resources but they don't want him to have full access.

[00:02:45]>> No I'm asking I'm asking I think a lot of women want a man's resources >> getting help getting help is a part of it >> but I think that whatever companionship looks like more and more women >> are saying that they want companionship but they don't necessarily want to share spaces with a man. Yeah, because they want me they feel like it. They they don't want to be committed to duty. They want to cater to you when I feel like it. When I don't want to, don't ask me for anything.

[00:03:13]>> And that's be a lot of friction because most men I mean I don't know you know y'all p I mean how y'all feel personally but most men are possessive. So they that's going to be like a you know what I'm saying? If a woman wants to live on her own and be with you, they not going to have that. That's why That's why >> it's not about being possessive though because you're supposed to be being led.

[00:03:36]>> It should You shouldn't have It's not about being possessive. Why do you have an issue with him leading you?

[00:03:40]>> Yeah, but if you if you >> mama didn't have nobody to lead them.

[00:03:43]That's where they're getting this from.

[00:03:45]They're growing up this environment.

[00:03:47]>> They're just following what they mama did. They mama didn't have a man in the household. And that's what they want.

[00:03:52]They want to do what they want and not have a man tell them or put rules or boundaries. And that's not how it should be. Like >> what is the point that life?

[00:04:02]>> Well, what's the what's the point of >> Yeah, it sounds miserable to me. I I don't want to live the way >> if I can't put no parameters on you when I'm not around you.

[00:04:16]>> What the [ __ ] Like, I ain't got no control anyway.

[00:04:19]>> So, >> say what? So, why be >> Who are you asking?

[00:04:27]Why be with her if you can't what?

[00:04:29]>> If you have no if you have no uh not necessarily control, but if you can't lead it, >> then what's the point of doing it? If you got to >> do everything from separate households in order for things to be, you know, operable, then what's the point? I mean, that's kind of like a friendship.

[00:04:48]>> Point or what?

[00:04:49]>> What's the point of of trying to What's the point of trying to have a relationship if you can't be in a household?

[00:04:55]>> Just date other people. I agree with you.

[00:04:57]>> So, so wait a minute. Are you saying that >> I can't lead from a different household?

[00:05:03]>> No. Women that you talk of, Anton, what the example you just gave, those women don't want to be led by a man. They want to do what they want to do.

[00:05:11]>> You can lead. You can leave.

[00:05:12]>> Agree. I think that >> I think I think they want that >> of a woman is to want to be led by a man.

[00:05:20]>> Yes. Agree. I disagree 100%.

[00:05:24]>> Exactly. Right.

[00:05:25]But that and security, what is what is the difference between that and security? Cuz women I feel like >> like cuz women that's what they looking for like they're looking for security where they why you said they don't even feel safe to even lay lay at the I mean spend the night with the guy if they want they just want to no no what I'm saying is >> and then women are women are apprehensive to show >> like I use the example of using a bathroom around a guy right Like [laughter] because I'm saying at the end of the day women just want to be secure like that's where know I mean they don't want to feel nose to do with >> insecure secure is like financially or or it could be even like in your presence like know I mean even so how >> how is she not secure financially or in your or when she in your presence I don't I don't understand >> back to no back I'm just piggy backing from you said nowadays that Men, a lot of women might want to go somewhere and spend the night. They don't want they don't want to spend the night. They might give it up and not want to spend the night or different things.

[00:06:37]I mean, >> oh, man. That [ __ ] sound. I'm just jumping in there.

[00:06:41]>> Wild as hell.

[00:06:42]>> I'm jumping in there.

[00:06:43]>> Why do I sound wild to you?

[00:06:45]>> Because it's like it's like you you could say what's possible, but then what's probable behind that?

[00:06:52]>> You know what I mean? It's like, so y'all want to be in a relationship, >> but you can't you cannot come to a point where y'all could be in the same household together.

[00:07:03]>> No, I can't. I can't.

[00:07:05]>> Look, [ __ ] >> You said you're not under you're not in the same household just because you have somewhere else that you can go at times.

[00:07:12]>> You're taking this out of context. When I'm Y'all think it's a one-sizefits-all.

[00:07:19]Everybody don't subscribe to the same thing that everybody else subscribes.

[00:07:23]That's a fact.

[00:07:24]>> So for some people, for example, for you, >> you may Jaywin say, "You know what? I want to check around me 24/7, 365." No.

[00:07:34]Right.

[00:07:34]>> No, I don't want >> Hold on, hold on, hold on. I'm not saying that you do.

[00:07:38]>> Are we supposed to additional circumstance? I'm saying that there may be guys that prefer to live seven days a week with they ch and then it may be other guys that say I want you to have your own space and I want to have my own space and I want to come through and be there for the weekend but then I got to go and take care of some other [ __ ] or I want you to come and spend the night with me or whatever but I want you to have your own space. What I'm saying an answer to the question that is at the bottom of the screen is that there will not only be two types of relationships in the future. There are all kind of dynamics that work.

[00:08:15]>> There are households, for example, and this is traditional. This ain't even nothing new. Grandmama and granddaddy didn't even sleep in the same [ __ ] room because he sore.

[00:08:27]>> They didn't sleep in the same room. They had sex. He went to his room. she went to his room or maybe he worked maybe he worked afternoons or he worked overnight and then he had to sleep in the daytime and so it was a whole another dynamic.

[00:08:39]They couldn't afford to get a different place but it was a diff it was outside of what people just because you wasn't familiar with it because it wasn't on social media back then don't mean that they didn't figure out what worked for them in order for them to have the best dynamic in a relationship. So my point is that there are never going to only be two t types of relationships. We we look at this because we have an ideal of what we think a relationship is supposed to look like. What that do honestly is it [ __ ] you up because if you don't fit into this traditional role basically what y'all saying is people are unmarable and I don't believe that. I believe that companionship is inevitable. We all want it in some capacity and we keep trying to fit into these narratives instead of trying to figure out what makes the most sense so that you can be in this companionship that works for you.

[00:09:33]>> I guess I guess the situation >> trying to put everybody in a box and I don't think that the box is the only way for it to work and to be successful.

[00:09:41]>> I guess the situation would um would just kind of I guess you would have to look at the whole spectrum of it. if you have kids. Uh because it's like if you're in and out the house.

[00:09:54]>> Well, that's a different dynamic.

[00:09:56]>> But I'm saying but I mean back then if we go back to what you said earlier, back then people had families, big families.

[00:10:04]I mean, how how good would that dynamic be if you're in and out of the house?

[00:10:08]>> I believe that a lot of them [ __ ] up rel [ __ ] up the culture by having these big ass families that they couldn't take care of. But that's all >> that's a fact. Uh, I contest because uh I'm I'm from Sagal >> and I seen people with >> That's why we was [ __ ] poor.

[00:10:26]>> We had to bunk up because we we >> y'all because we had these big ass families and everybody felt like they had to have a thousand kids that they couldn't take care of and we was on government food stamps.

[00:10:37]>> And you and you wonder how the father had babies with that big ass mother.

[00:10:41][laughter] Damn, you had so many kids with that big lady.

[00:10:46]I mean, even without the big families, there's still people with one child and struggling. [laughter] Like, you should even had a child cuz can you even afford to take care of the child? So, it's not even in the >> But if I if I think if I understand when Anton says when cuz that does work for some people cuz I remember him saying if you get two separate places, it's always new. I can understand that. It's not good for me, but I can understand that that analogy, you know, that happening like that. It'll always be fresh.

[00:11:17]>> We have to be realistic. Shampoo can can most >> I'm not I'm not saying it's good. I'm just I can >> You and Anton can afford to >> No, I'm not saying I don't agree with it. I wouldn't do it.

[00:11:29]>> And these these women are not going to want to do that. They barely want to go 50/50 and eat a Cheesecake Factory. I [laughter] don't I'm I'm one of them 360 seven days a week. I want to be up under like >> good. I love that for you.

[00:11:44]>> I can't walk. Holly walk. What else I'mma do now? I always been like that needy like that. Like you know what I'm saying? But at the same time a leader too.

[00:11:53]>> You know what I'm saying? I put my foot down when they when it got to be I'm not no stupid. You know what I'm saying?

[00:11:58]>> Okay. What are what are people doing that's single is what I'm asking >> by themselves? But I'm talking about when I hear women speak, right? You think the women of today will want to get married and still live separate lifestyles. These women are not what I'm asking is you're saying that people can barely do this and they doing that. They doing it already.

[00:12:22]>> So why that's that's because the emotions aren't involved into it. And because >> they're not able to do it if they already doing it is what I'm asking.

[00:12:30]>> Yes, you're right. But they have to. But the women of today, they're going to they're marrying not all for resources.

[00:12:37]You think they're going to want to marry and still live like they're single?

[00:12:41]>> Yeah. But but Q, you always you saying resources? We we we're not that far into the future where people do get married because they're in love.

[00:12:52]>> It's not always resources. Women when women get married they want to they don't I don't think a woman would want to live separate not because of resources because she wants to be with that person she loves.

[00:13:05]>> I mean that too. Yes. There's those type of women. There's multiple types of women.

[00:13:09]>> I don't want to pony but that's how women.

[00:13:12]>> Yes. They're going to want to be there's going to be women that afraid that he's going to be doing something else in the other place. There's different types of women but majority wise most people are not going to live in two places.

[00:13:22]some women that's saying that they don't want to get married nowadays. So now, >> yeah, I I >> Yeah, because they say they say that until later on.

[00:13:32]>> [ __ ] until later on.

[00:13:32]>> They say that because of the trauma they they went through. You know what I mean?

[00:13:35]Exactly. Either way, whatever it is, they saying that they may not want to get married. So now what?

[00:13:41]>> Yeah, you know that's not true though.

[00:13:44]>> Some But some women say that so you could you prove to them that you know that they you know what I'm saying? Like that's >> think that people should take people at face value.

[00:13:54]I don't think that nobody should assume anything. Believe them when they tell you.

[00:13:59]>> So if that be the case, then >> what are we to believe?

[00:14:04]>> Oh, don't believe all women. Y'all ever heard that?

[00:14:10]>> Nah. I like I said, I think that I think that more people are open to >> alternative alternative living situation than you than you would imagine.

[00:14:21]Um, I don't think that everybody we we was on this panel and we did a conversation where I asked all of the guys. I said, "If y'all could y'all have y'all own place and every last one of the [ __ ] say yes." So, what we talking about?

[00:14:35]>> Were they married? Were they single?

[00:14:36]>> Yeah, but you talking about the men though, bro.

[00:14:38]>> They was married.

[00:14:39]>> You're talking about the men.

[00:14:41]>> Yeah, but but have you seen their wife [laughter] >> on a different it? We saying, "Oh, no, no, no." When every last person that was on that panel said that they was in >> I think I do remember that they were married.

[00:14:59]>> Like, y'all just don't like y'all wives.

[00:15:00]That's That's a big >> That's a bigger issue. If you don't like your wife said that >> and one of them was >> had nothing to do with it.

[00:15:09]>> Who?

[00:15:10]>> One of them was polygenist.

[00:15:13]OH, >> NO. THAT'S NOT TRUE. I don't think that was the one. He wasn't that wasn't the situation. That wasn't it for that one.

[00:15:20]>> Oh, >> I don't I don't listen listen.

[00:15:22]>> I just I just think that people need to do what work for them.

[00:15:26]>> Yeah, I agree with that.

[00:15:27]>> I don't think that I don't think that every person >> is interested in disrupting what the [ __ ] they got going on in their space >> in order to integrate somebody into that [ __ ] I don't >> I don't think that everybody want to disrupt what they got going on. I think that sometimes people like, "Yo, I like what's going on right here >> and this works for us."

[00:15:49]>> That's why when women in are in toxic relationship, leave it alone. If you if you got girlfriend, if you got a girlfriend in a toxic relationship or whatever, you don't have to preach to her. She don't want to hear that [ __ ] from you. She She know what I'm saying? She Let's just let her be her. Oh, you know what? You should do this and you should do that. I don't like when people do that. Give me advice. This [ __ ] beating up on me. I like you, [ __ ] Leave me alone.

[00:16:16]Mind your business. [laughter] You going to ruin if you keep preaching to me, you going to ruin our >> Somebody said, Anton, I thought you was about tradition and nuclear family. I am about some tradition and nuclear family.

[00:16:31]What y'all traditions look like was [ __ ] though.

[00:16:35]some of y'all traditions. Your granddaddy was normally beating on your grandmama and that was >> I don't like that particular type. I don't like that tradition. That's >> disrespect myself to.

[00:16:46]>> So, um I don't know if y'all figured it out, >> but relationships is the only thing in society and in life that some for some reason we see all of this evolution happening around us. It happen in our workplace. It happen in our careers. It happen in the way we travel. It happened in the way that we interact with technology, but for some reason we're expected to stay the exact same and some [ __ ] >> that >> the whole the whole dynamic by which we were subjected to it was different.

[00:17:17]>> Like what tradition looked like women couldn't vote, >> women couldn't work in the same jobs. We couldn't travel the way that we needed to travel. We didn't have social media back then. We didn't have the type of technology. We didn't have the type of money. We didn't even have the type of resources. Most of the time for us as a culture, for the majority of us that's up here, our ancestors was poor as [ __ ] We didn't have options. We couldn't even look at what the possibilities was. We never traveled. We didn't know what other cultures was doing in order to generate more revenue. We didn't have college. We didn't have education. We didn't have knowledge. We didn't have a lot of things. We didn't have the type of understanding that we have now. And so, we expected to operate with the same mindset that we had when we was poor as [ __ ] dumb as [ __ ] and had less options. and we didn't even have the option to be able to go in the same bathroom as other people, but yet we supposed to still stay the same [ __ ] same. I don't understand that [ __ ] Like, why is it that we can't look in the past and say, "Okay, I want to take this, this, and this because this works, and then I want to implement this, this, and this because this actually is more conducive for what we doing."

[00:18:23]>> I don't I don't get that. That's what we do in every aspect of life, but we supposed to stay the same for some [ __ ] that ain't working. If I don't know if y'all realize it, but the but the divorce rates is up. Relationships is [ __ ] up. Single motherhood is up more than ever. And y'all don't want to try nothing new.

[00:18:41]>> Y'all don't want to have no different types of conversations. Oh, no. We just got to stay the [ __ ] same. Guess what, [ __ ] She don't like living with you.

[00:18:50]>> And you don't like living with her, but y'all like each other like a [ __ ] And so why don't y'all try something different?

[00:18:59]Keep sleeping in that same twin ass bed.

[00:19:03]>> Oh man. Not even not even a fool joint.

[00:19:08][laughter] >> [ __ ] sleeping over the same old dumb [ __ ] Like come on, man. Wake up and evolve. Just because that don't mean you can't have family. That don't mean you can't have success. That don't mean you can't have a relationship. That don't mean that you can't have monogamy. But you need to wake the [ __ ] up.

[00:19:25]Maybe maybe y'all don't want have want to have kids. Guess what? That's completely different than what the expectation was in the past. So if y'all decide not to have kids, what does that look like? That's not a conversation that y'all want to have because the only thing that you looking at is what you think makes sense, but you ain't never seen it make sense because you ain't never had it in your own family.

[00:19:46]>> Like maybe y'all don't want to have kids. Maybe you only want to have one kid. Maybe you want to have six. I don't know. What does that look like? And what do we have?

[00:19:54]>> I think make sure that we keep it fresh.

[00:19:56]Y'all need time there whining about the fact that sexless relationships and all this stuff. Okay, fix it. What does that look like? Maybe y'all need to be in a mindset that y'all still dating.

[00:20:07]>> How do you create the environment to where it seem like still dating?

[00:20:11]>> And you can't let yourself You can't men and women you can't let yourself go.

[00:20:16]them women but people in relationships got a tendency after man maybe after two years they start letting their self go you know what I'm saying like like you know not doing the thing keeping up with their stuff and you know nails done and all that type of [ __ ] especially men they stop doing [ __ ] then when they get a a new chick they you know I'm putting putting cologne on and getting you got to keep yourself up too shampoo I'll do you one different bro I'mma be 100% honest Women think some of y'all [ __ ] is boring.

[00:20:50]>> Yeah, >> true.

[00:20:53]>> You're boring.

[00:20:54]>> A lot of y'all boring on [laughter] this is what you want.

[00:20:57]>> They won't say, "Oh, [ __ ] that's the [ __ ] that she deal."

[00:20:59]>> And they won't tell you. They won't tell you that cuz that's hard to tell.

[00:21:03]>> You're boring.

[00:21:04]>> Boring.

[00:21:05]>> You keep on doing this same old same old [ __ ] You the same way. You think the same way. You ain't even got a different food. You keep on eating chicken strips like you three >> chicken [ __ ] boring [ __ ] boring >> [ __ ] boring bro >> you gota you can't be boring to them I don't care how long I'm married 30 years I'm like say you I'm boring >> you you know what you know what the >> look at it like this what would you do if you were single except you in a relationship [clears throat and snorts] >> treat her the same way that you would treat her if you was just meeting her and you were single and that [ __ ] somebody else will or another [ __ ] will.

[00:21:44]>> Well, you know the main problem I find with a lot of guys, especially my homeboy, we was talking about this earlier. We don't live life enough. Like we we waiting for something to happen to us. You know what I'm saying? Like we waiting for like I don't even know what we waiting for, but we don't live life on our own. Like we don't go out to places like I'm I'm a record guy. I'm a music guy. We don't go to record stores.

[00:22:09]We don't go to events. We don't actually live our lives, you know. So, >> why why why you think that is?

[00:22:18]>> I I think it's honestly because we waiting for something to happen. We waiting for maybe a person to come into our lives to do stuff together with or I I find a lot of people do that. You know, they say that about a woman a lot, but I find men they sitting around waiting for stuff to happen too. Like they not out living lives. They're not going to events. They [snorts] not touching grass. They online all the time, whether it's playing games, watching Id knows what. Like they not living life for real. And >> but if you don't go out, how do you expect to meet a girl or meet people?

[00:22:50]>> They they living online. They chronically online.

[00:22:52]>> They watching podcast and YouTube places.

[00:22:56]You could find stuff on social media and meet people in person, too.

[00:23:00]>> 100%. But they don't. But the vast >> all the why don't you do it then? Like not even just your friends, but why don't you do it and encourage them to do it?

[00:23:09]>> Oh, I Oh, well I I live this. I know I do it on my own, too. And they do it, too. But we know so many guys like that who, you know, it's working home.

[00:23:19]Working home. [clears throat] And they don't plan anything to do for themselves.

[00:23:23]>> [ __ ] is awkward, man. I think I think with um nothing >> with [snorts] co it kind of made people a lot of complacent and just watching YouTube be on on social media hollering at chicks online because it's easier to send 10 DMs and get rejected in real life.