QUIET CRACKING Explained: The New Workplace Burnout?! | The Hop Pod Ep 143

Added: 2026-05-27

[00:00:00]We like to struggle.

[00:00:00]>> No, it's a competition who struggle more.

[00:00:02]>> Correct. They come back from holiday, right? Then they'll show that they >> 10,000 emails.

[00:00:06]>> Inbox got 10,000. Come on, everybody know all those you just like is all the newsletters and subscription >> then like your it telling you to change password.

[00:00:16]>> Singaporeans are generally very miserable because it's way too hot.

[00:00:20]>> Yeah. Honestly, think of it.

[00:00:23]>> If it was 5° colder, I'll be a better person.

[00:00:26]>> No, three. I'm happy already.

[00:00:34]Hey everyone and welcome back to another episode of the hot pot where we hop into different transitions in life. I'm Q.

[00:00:39]>> I'm Joey.

[00:00:40]>> I'm Nick. And quick check-in before we start. Have you all ever had a week at work? Right. Where nothing is technically wrong. I just feel a bit off.

[00:00:49]>> Always.

[00:00:50]>> Always. I shouldn't say recently. Yes.

[00:00:53]>> How have you all been?

[00:00:54]>> Tired.

[00:00:55]>> You say you wait. We've been tired since December. Yeah. Yeah. I think I think we need to >> I think we need to move on.

[00:01:00]>> We need to change the vibe.

[00:01:01]>> The branding is >> Okay. I'm exhausted and I'm hanging on by a thread.

[00:01:06]>> No, no. Cannot. We must.

[00:01:07]>> But I'm having fun.

[00:01:09]>> Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

[00:01:10]>> Like can I just say that my body cannot keep up with how I feel. Like my body is so tired. My brain is alo very tired.

[00:01:17]But my extrovert self is very excited.

[00:01:19]>> Is it um the emoji would be uh the smiley the tear? Smiley the tear drop.

[00:01:25]No, it's ah okay.

[00:01:28]>> I feel like that now you >> I think I'm okay.

[00:01:31]>> Oh, better.

[00:01:32]>> Yeah, I want to move on from that branding already. I'm quite sick of being tired actually. I told myself actually just like one week ago I was reflecting. You know what? I need to get out of this funk.

[00:01:41]>> Yeah. Like for what? For what? Feel tired for what?

[00:01:45]>> I know that you've been having trouble sleeping.

[00:01:47]>> My sleep has been quite poor. So I track my sleep. Um also I have people wonder like thinking that I wear two watches.

[00:01:52]Someone actually said like, "Wow, double wristing watches is a >> double wristing sounds really strange."

[00:01:58]>> Double wristing.

[00:02:00]>> No, I don't want to rephrase.

[00:02:02]>> Damn.

[00:02:03]>> But yeah, I know this is a sleep tracker. It's quite demoralizing cuz every night fail, >> but I also don't want to make my branding already. Instead of saying Tai, I am resilient.

[00:02:11]>> You're pressing on.

[00:02:12]>> I'm pressing on.

[00:02:13]>> I'm looking forward.

[00:02:14]>> Correct.

[00:02:14]>> Majula.

[00:02:15]>> So anyway, right talking about this mood that we are in, right? Or this vibe that we are in where we're actually doing okay. pressing forward, moving on, having fun, but then at the same time a little bit like um >> are we cracking beneath the surface?

[00:02:30]>> Oh, I I like that you brought that up because um what a good segway.

[00:02:35]>> Today's topic, right, we are actually talking about quiet cracking.

[00:02:40]>> Quiet cracking.

[00:02:41]>> At first when um I saw that we were talking about this topic, right, with without the script.

[00:02:46]>> Yeah.

[00:02:46]>> Um I thought it was something else.

[00:02:48]>> Like what? No, he thought it was something dirty.

[00:02:50]>> Yeah. Oh >> no. What what exactly would it be?

[00:02:54]>> Like cracking is is what? Right.

[00:02:56]>> Sorry, I don't know.

[00:02:57]>> Never mind.

[00:02:58]>> Let me take a crack at it.

[00:03:00]>> But when I saw the topic, I was wondering whether it's similar to quiet quitting because we talked about it before.

[00:03:06]>> Okay. So quiet cracking, right? Unlike quiet quitting, workers mentally check out and then they do the bare minimum at work, >> right? Quiet cracking is when you are still showing up. You are still doing your job, but you are internally struggling with pressure, uncertainty, and feeling stuck until you hit a breaking point. Then the quiet cracking not so quiet really.

[00:03:27]>> So is it quiet because your co-workers cannot tell you're cracking?

[00:03:31]>> Yeah. It's like a maybe very self internalized thing at the start.

[00:03:34]>> Yeah. You're suffering on your own.

[00:03:36]>> Yeah.

[00:03:36]>> But you still love your job.

[00:03:38]>> Yeah. Okay.

[00:03:39]>> Maybe I feel like for what we do like when we show up for the podcast, it has to be quiet cracking because if we are cracking, >> we quite loud then the camera will just shoot nonsense, right?

[00:03:49]>> No, but I think we're loud cracking already because we've been talking about >> vocalizing how exhausted we are.

[00:03:54]>> But because of the nature of this podcast, we can crack loudly.

[00:03:57]>> Okay.

[00:03:57]>> Course you all can relate, right?

[00:03:59]Content.

[00:04:00]>> Okay.

[00:04:01]>> Okay. Today's episode was actually inspired by a Reddit thread discussing quiet cracking among Singaporean workers sparked by a Business Times article on this trend. So, we'll be unpacking what it really means, why it's happening, how relatable it is, and healthier ways to cope with it.

[00:04:16]>> And this was also inspired by a comment on our overconumption episode where someone mentioned that they were feeling inadequate at work.

[00:04:23]>> So, keep your suggestions coming because your idea might shape our next episode.

[00:04:26]Okay. So, we talked about making work your identity with Miss Angai back in 2024.

[00:04:31]>> She got two children baby when she was on, right? She >> she was pregnant like but it was secret.

[00:04:38]>> Yeah.

[00:04:38]>> Oh, yeah. Correct. Cor right correct.

[00:04:40]Cor right correct. Okay. So, the episode we discussed making work your identity recently. We've been talking a lot about burnout but this feels like a slightly different conversation. So, the first question is what are some signs of quiet cracking especially if it's not as visible?

[00:04:55]>> Ooh. would like not wanting to join your colleagues for a lunch break.

[00:05:01]>> Ah, actually true >> because you just have no more >> capacity >> capacity. It's either you do your job or you socialize. There's no space for both.

[00:05:10]>> But that could also be quite quitting cuz you don't bother making connections anymore.

[00:05:15]>> So in the ven diagram, this is a shared >> but then this kind of like thing like lunch with your colleagues is not really in your job scope. So it could be that in your job scope you are doing everything um and you might not be doing the bare minimum maybe you are even excelling in certain areas of your core job scope >> but all these like ancillary joint team bonding go for cohesion >> go for company retreat >> go for community service >> you're no longer excited or willing to go for these events I think another sign is if you start crying >> oh like you stress then you cry like you've been crying because of work >> but it's not known to your friends or your colleagues. That mean you cry silently.

[00:05:58]>> So after meeting you close the laptop then you like >> you break down.

[00:06:02]>> Wow. You got like that before.

[00:06:03]>> I have I cried every day before work when I was a kindergarten teacher >> before work because you dread. Yeah cuz I just was not ready for the day. I was just exhausted from the day before already and I had to restart.

[00:06:14]>> 7 a.m. I wake up.

[00:06:16]>> I remember I was on FaceTime with Charlie and then like this.

[00:06:19]>> So it's like while you getting ready.

[00:06:21]>> Yeah. I cry that I put makeup there. I wipe the the tears. I put concealer.

[00:06:26]>> When would you stop crying? Like before you leave the house.

[00:06:28]>> Yeah. Got to get your [ __ ] together.

[00:06:30]>> Once you leave the house. Okay.

[00:06:31]>> Uh right before I enter the premise, I wipe my final tear that I go into my final tear.

[00:06:40]>> Before I know what >> No, but I I get it because mine is uh in my second job, I cry every day after work.

[00:06:48]>> So I go home, I lie on my floor, right?

[00:06:49]I lay on my floor, I cry. I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to do this anymore. But you know, have to commit. Those were signs of quiet cracking.

[00:06:57]>> But what about the one where you say you close your laptop after a meeting then you cry? What's the trigger?

[00:07:02]>> Uh as in I can just say out loud that it was in the first few years of first one to two years of YGW like when we first launched. Um I think there were a lot of stresses back then plus I had to also take on an editing role.

[00:07:17]>> So you know editing takes up so much time. I was spending a lot of nights editing the first few series that we launched like the group project, >> Spill it, all all of those series and then I would be rushing every week to edit.

[00:07:32]>> Yeah. Then I think that was the moment where I w I really couldn't take it cuz >> I was losing sleep.

[00:07:37]>> So more editing is like it's a hard day in line, right? Must upload today means must upload today.

[00:07:42]>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:07:43]>> That's true. As I know a lot of my friends who do sometimes cry during their lunch breaks. I think it comes in phases though. It's very dependent on maybe like a project that is being thrown at you.

[00:07:55]>> Actually, what about you Nick? Like you are in a fairly high position at work.

[00:07:59]The stakes are higher and as such do you feel a difference as to when you were in a maybe a starter position?

[00:08:06]>> I have experienced stress throughout my career. At no point have I ever felt that like wow my stress today is so much more stressful than my stress last time.

[00:08:14]I feel like at every kind of stage on the corporate ladder or like as you climb like a workplace hierarchy there will be different levels of stress if you care about the job.

[00:08:25]>> Yeah. If you really >> I think if you don't care also there will be stresses though like you don't care about whether the output is good or not right >> I think there is still stresses because of how people perceive you still have to care enough to keep your job. So, for example, people who quiet quit, right? I think they quiet quit because they don't want to deal with their stress.

[00:08:45]>> They don't give a anymore.

[00:08:46]>> Maybe they're like, "Oh, I don't care that I'm going to get laid off or fired or maybe it's like those iron rice bowl jobs where they cannot be fired." But I feel like as long as you care um about the work and how people perceive you and the effort you put in and your competency, you feel stressed.

[00:09:00]>> But then I think the annoying thing is when um I cannot do anything about that stress. So when I was more junior because of um people more senior than me making mistakes then that stress cascades down. I need to solve that problem when actually I I >> it's not even your problem >> when it's not even my problem >> and you have to navigate it very carefully >> understand >> whereas now I am further upstream in terms of like if I can make everybody's lives a bit easier and reduce the amount of stress then I try to do that. So according to this Reddit thread, user bel999 shares, "When we say people crack under pressure, we usually mean when it's noticeable." So they become highly erratic, irritable, or they just go bananas. But quiet means that a person can suffer a lot of stress, yet it's invisible until maybe one day he snaps.

[00:09:48]So it's an important part of mental wellness for people to make sense of what is happening to themselves, their loved ones, or their staff before it's too late.

[00:09:55]>> I have a a perspective.

[00:09:56]>> Yes. Cuz this person is saying that people who do suffer a lot of stress and they remain invisible, right? Don't you think that is linked to the the color personality, the green, yellow, red and blue?

[00:10:08]>> The episode that we did really, is it?

[00:10:10]>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That one. Basically red are loud people. They would vocalize their thoughts. They would lead and then greens are followers. Blues are also a bit more follower, a bit more quiet. Um but they do more of like the analytical work. So I personally feel that rates tend to show their stress more because they don't exactly care as much about keeping the peace.

[00:10:36]>> Whereas someone who is a green personality, they they wouldn't want people to perceive them that way or they don't want to burden other people.

[00:10:43]>> So I feel like it's also tied to people's personality on whether they are quiet or loud cracking. For me, I would voice out to my supervisor.

[00:10:52]>> Right. Interesting.

[00:10:53]>> Do you think that I will voice out or not voice out?

[00:10:55]>> No. So, so you are red, right? You you do vocalize your thoughts and your ideas, but I think because you also have this upbringing of, you know, being that that elder son, you need to be in charge. You need to take care of everything. You don't need to make your problem other people's problem. Then I think you wouldn't voice out as much as me.

[00:11:14]>> Correct. Correct. In the sense that I wouldn't voice out.

[00:11:16]>> Yeah. Yeah. Correct. It's just that to me if I feel like I'm suffering and it doesn't make sense and it's not logical because of my bandwidth and I don't I'm just one person and I cannot do all of these things right. I will voice out.

[00:11:27]>> Do you think I'm the kind of person that will voice out?

[00:11:29]>> Last time maybe a bit more people pleaser but then now you know your rights.

[00:11:33]>> Yeah. Now she'll fight back all the jobs I I quit or I left right it's cuz it was unethical and then I voiced out. If it's a very black and white situation I think easy to voice out cuz there's a clear right or wrong right. But when it's things that are maybe a little bit harder to prove when you're in a corporate setting, sometimes things get lost, you might be given a task that technically is not doesn't fall under you, but they can argue that it falls under you, >> right? Then that's when it gets tricky because you can't prove the black and white. And then by the time you do that, you prove that you're not a team player.

[00:12:03]You're showing that you are not willing to um pull your weight in a team setting. Then it might affect your future in the company. I think that is what causes people to start cracking because you're like, I have no choice but to take this on. Then you feel like you have to suffer in silence and alone, right? Okay. So, there was actually a survey which was done by a recruitment agency, Robert Walters. It found that 30% of workers in Singapore experience quiet cracking regularly while 65% experience it occasionally. So, this rate is actually much higher than the global average. Can I also just say right I genuinely think that Singaporeans are generally very miserable because it's way too hot.

[00:12:43]>> Yeah. Honestly think of it.

[00:12:46]>> I feel like if it was 5° colder, I'll be a better person.

[00:12:50]>> No. Three are happy already. But do you agree that Singaporeans are we generally more hardworking than maybe other countries?

[00:12:56]>> I think so.

[00:12:57]>> Yeah. I think that because it's so competitive here, cost of living is so high and from young there's a structure or system in place that rewards like hard work and kind of like competing and outperforming the next person, right?

[00:13:11]>> Then that mindset is carried into adulthood. Um where in the workplace they're so scared of like losing out or like falling behind. If you don't have that pure competency or capability then you compensate by putting in more and more hours. It's like a big system that trickles down, but because we're so small, our efficiency rate needs to be higher compared to other countries. And I mean, it's proven. One of our local actresses moved to France. I think it's Sharon.

[00:13:37]>> Sharon. Yeah.

[00:13:38]>> Yeah. So, Sharon Al moved to Europe and then HR issued her like letters like this is your final warning like please go and explore some activities in your personal life. and she shared it and I'm like that's crazy cuz it's very normal for us Singaporeans to be working like I'm quite mindful when I I'll try and schedule messages cuz it's really a very Singaporean thing where you see you need to deal with it immediately even if it's a Sunday it's very hard for people to like I'll check back on Monday >> actually I realized that um Singaporeans also on the other hand right we like to victimize ourselves a bit I think we like to >> struggle >> we like to struggle >> yeah we really do know it's a competition who struggle more >> correct you see like you go to your Instagram stories, right? Then sometimes like 11:00 at night and someone will take a picture of their their laptop, of their MacBook still open. Then it's like the outlook.

[00:14:26]>> This happened when we were like 20, 22, 23.

[00:14:30]>> But I don't think Instagram is all about that now.

[00:14:32]>> No, still got But but it's very millennial. No, actually is like older millennial.

[00:14:36]>> Your like your friends?

[00:14:38]>> No. No. Older then it's the black black and white picture of the MacBook then or like they come back from holiday, right?

[00:14:44]Then they'll show that they >> 10,000 emails.

[00:14:46]>> Inbox got 10,000. Come on. Everybody know all those. You just like is all the newsletters and everything like subscription >> then like your it telling you to change password you want to bluff who >> I find a very Singaporean problem where if you say you're very busy then you're like w then you relax then you say you're not busy w your life so good like there's always something to say and there's always something to do and either way we are not happy >> actually on that note right have you not even heard of this term before >> no I saw it online >> uh I think it's just a recent trending term.

[00:15:20]>> You'll find that sometimes we come up with too many terms.

[00:15:22]>> Yeah. Why? If they don't come up with terms, we cannot do more episodes.

[00:15:25]>> True.

[00:15:26]>> So, it benefits us.

[00:15:27]>> Actually, it's just shack.

[00:15:29]>> It's just different ways to describe Shaq.

[00:15:31]>> Yeah. Sh. But I do think that it's interesting because the nuances is I mean sometimes we just cannot describe the exact feeling.

[00:15:39]>> Do you feel like coming up with these terms and giving them a name like actually contributes to like that negative vibe? No, I think it brings meaning.

[00:15:48]>> Oh, is it?

[00:15:49]>> I think it brings meaning to life.

[00:15:51]>> Very melancholic.

[00:15:52]>> It's It's a bit like how on Tik Tok now there's I always keep seeing every other day got some new theory.

[00:15:57]>> How I see this is just like synonyms of sad.

[00:16:02]>> Yeah, >> there's disappointed. Sad being sad and disappointed is different.

[00:16:06]>> Just like quite quitting and quieting is different.

[00:16:08]>> Yeah. So, I do think it's important to differentiate >> the the circumstance and the feeling, the emotion. Actually, I do think it's important because it helps you figure out what stage you are and whether there's still room to salvage anything because there are people who are unhappy, right? We've seen in our parents' generation, they just they're unhappy, but they don't know what is causing it and how unhappy they are. So, if you if you can classify it by stages, then you know whether there's still a chance for you to stay on in this company and be happy or if it's time to move on. But do you guys think that this is tied to a matter of job expectations versus job reality?

[00:16:47]>> I don't think so. No, I think it's just like other kind of like environmental factors.

[00:16:54]Just you have people to provide for, things are expensive, scared to lose your job.

[00:16:59]>> I do think that that's a possibility on top of that. So maybe when you first start a company and there's been like maybe a year or two years, you're expected to have some sort of progression, but your life also progresses, right? Maybe at that time you get into a relationship and you're planning for a wedding. So finances are tighter and then to save on cost, maybe you plan yourself. So your time that you have is shorter, which means at work you might maximize time in between lunch break, I'm going to work on my wedding.

[00:17:30]So you become a lot less present and you have less brain space. There's so many things because your life progresses but then your work also is expected to progress but then your attention span cannot be split. So there's only so much you can do. So I feel like it's a little bit of both.

[00:17:43]>> I'm just so confused by this term. Like I I just think that there are so many >> quiet cracking.

[00:17:49]>> Yeah, there are just so many layers.

[00:17:50]>> I feel like it needs to be visualized in an egg form. Is are you cracking in the first layer or third layer? Like if you crack outer layer means you're ready to quit already.

[00:17:59]>> Okay. Wait, wait. Because I'm so confused, right? Because I feel like I can relate to this feeling, but sometimes it's just a one day thing.

[00:18:07]Correct.

[00:18:07]>> So, is quiet cracking a face a one day thing or like it will lead to a quiet quitting. You know what I mean?

[00:18:14]>> Ultimately, like when you compare to like burnout, it's just like burnout, but you don't tell people >> essentially. But I feel like burn out means there's been a pretty like distinct fracture. It's not a crack. How about burning out?

[00:18:31]>> Ah, burning out is >> on the way there. On the way there.

[00:18:34]Okay. Oh, yes. Burning out is like you're boiling the the egg.

[00:18:37]>> Correct.

[00:18:38]>> Haven't cracked yet.

[00:18:39]>> You're boiling the egg.

[00:18:40]>> Haven't cracked yet.

[00:18:40]>> Then crack in like the inside crack.

[00:18:43]Then outside crack. When the outside really break. There's a hole. That's when they burn.

[00:18:47]>> Okay. Then if you think of it as an egg, right? Means it's irreversible the crack or can glue back.

[00:18:53]>> Can put the washi tape.

[00:18:54]>> I think so.

[00:18:57]Matt Lips time.

[00:18:59]>> Welcome hosts to Matt Lips. Here's how the game works.

[00:19:03]>> We've prepared a special story with a bunch of fill in the blanks. I'll first ask each of you for words, adjectives, nouns, verbs, and adverbs. And once we've filled them in, you'll take turns reading the story aloud and reacting to it.

[00:19:17]>> I already know your like or at least maybe Q don't know what is adverb.

[00:19:23]>> No, I'm sorry. Adverbs.

[00:19:25]>> I hate this adverb. Verb, adjective, noun. But what's adverbs?

[00:19:29]>> Adverb is a action word, right?

[00:19:31]>> Proverbs.

[00:19:32]>> Okay. Joey, give me an adjective.

[00:19:34]>> Bombastic.

[00:19:35]>> Uh, Nick, give me an adjective.

[00:19:36]>> Chill.

[00:19:37]>> Q, give me an adjective.

[00:19:39]>> Intelligent.

[00:19:40]>> What's describing me?

[00:19:42]>> Joey, give me an adjective.

[00:19:43]>> Bombastic.

[00:19:45]>> Titillating.

[00:19:46]>> What's titillating? How do you spell that?

[00:19:50]>> Okay. And last one. Everyone agree on a adjective. How about girthy?

[00:19:56]>> I like girthy.

[00:19:57]>> So before you start reading, please each take one piece of paper from Lenny.

[00:20:02]>> Huh?

[00:20:03]>> This one feeling like already.

[00:20:05]>> These contain special twists/ conditions that you'll have to follow during your turn or if you're lucky, you might be spared.

[00:20:12]>> So I'll start first before I start. Here is my condition. Hosts who are reacting must either applaud dramatically if the statement said is true or yell objection if the statement said is untrue. Welcome one and all to the tales of the hot pot the origin story.

[00:20:30]Three friends, Joey, Q, and Nick, decided to take their friendship and early 30s confusion to the next level by starting a podcast.

[00:20:42]>> So they could add their relatable adultting roles and hopefully make the rest of you feel LESS ALONE.

[00:20:47]>> WOOHOO!

[00:20:49]>> BUT WHAT exactly do each of them bring to the table? First up, Joey, a 31-year-old bombastic creative hailing from Singapore's CHILL MUSIC SCENE.

[00:20:59]>> WOW.

[00:21:00]chill music scene.

[00:21:02]>> Some people know Joey from her intelligent album Pow.

[00:21:06]>> A >> others might recognize Joey from the titilating TV show GROOM MY ROOM.

[00:21:14]>> YES.

[00:21:15]>> Still not ringing a bell? Then you've probably seen Joy's wet mukbangs or the or the occasional pungent mental health reality check on >> objection. That is very insulting. In short, Joey is the internet's tyrannosaurus older sister. Equal parts thick and ready to hop you when you need it most.

[00:21:35]>> Objection. Objection.

[00:21:38]>> So, what meaning?

[00:21:40]>> Okay, now it's my turn. News anchor mode. The reader must read everything like breaking news. Ah, you so I canala.

[00:21:47]It's not your canal. Okay. Next, we have Q. Fellow 31-year-old internet gabanzo bean. No stranger to the media scene, Q is a swollen personality who isn't afraid to blink her opinions. Whether that's helpful pearls of wheelchair or brutally honest reminders meant to pierce your confidence. Q specialty sinking through life's chaos with a mix of introspection, fitness, fashion, and the occasional explosive social mixer.

[00:22:15]>> Wow.

[00:22:16]>> Actually quite good at yours.

[00:22:17]>> No, the first few words didn't make sense at all. Q is a 31y old gabanzo and she is a swollen personality.

[00:22:25]>> No. Um I mean sometimes I do look a bit swollen.

[00:22:27]>> Okay, my turn. The person who the story is being read about does a model pose every time they hear their name.

[00:22:36]>> Oh my god.

[00:22:36]>> Okay, our audio listeners, please come to YouTube because you wouldn't want to miss Nick posing like a model. And last but not least, we have our infected corporate DD Nick the OP. Sorry. The opinionated but quickly hilarious Nick might look like your typical Singaporean man, but online Nick's made machine gun with iconic lines like, "Hey, I'm quite a big deal." Okay. Chat GBT said I was a borderline genius. Did she hurt her back?

[00:23:04]Need squishy finance advice, fitness tips, plant advice? Run no further.

[00:23:10]Nick's got you covered. And together they formed the hot pot where three friends attempt to survive adulthood.

[00:23:16]one girthy opinion at a time.

[00:23:19]>> You know what our opinions are very >> girthy.

[00:23:24]>> So actually right if you think about burnout right a lot of times um it's not about job satisfaction or job expectations. There are a lot of high-flying people who really enjoy their jobs who find meaning in their jobs who are doing important work and then they are performing well or so but they still burn up like they don't manage like their own capacity well enough. M >> so actually when do job satisfaction and job performance right no longer matter in the workplace in this regard in my mind right it's when for people who are starting a family right once you have kids >> oh yes >> once I have kids right I don't care how satisfied or how much passion I get out of my job >> oh my god yes >> which is dangerous right >> why >> you are assuming this is when your kids need you but by the time they are at 8 to nine they at the age where they don't want to need you that's when you still need to have a very strong foundation of things that make you happy.

[00:24:15]>> But on the other hand, if for example now I have a 10k a month job and then this doesn't make me happy, but I got two kids, then there's an option to take a 5k a month job, but I super happy.

[00:24:28]>> Of course, you'll take the 10k and find a hobby or something, you know, >> it's not a bad thing because ultimately there's you need to >> it's a responsibility.

[00:24:37]>> Yeah. You need to take care of a life.

[00:24:39]Correct. So I do see parents checking out of their >> after they after they have kids, right?

[00:24:45]>> Yeah. And maybe the work that they do, they are no longer as passionate and as excited during meetings. They don't chime in as much as before. But family aside, what are other reasons for why people start to quite >> or if you don't plan to start a family?

[00:24:59]That's the other one.

[00:25:00]>> So then you you're just you're just coasting. You're just coasting and just doing the bare minimum at work.

[00:25:05]>> Cracking.

[00:25:06]>> Yeah. I do think also in Singapore very common not all obviously but there are times where you know there are employees who want to try they want to try and make things better and then when they take it up with their managers they realize that it is too big of a ladder to climb and it's a very simple solution but then you need to look at budget I actually experienced that once when I had like a full-time job right and I'm the kind of person that I need to put 100%. So for me to to have that moment where I'm like, you know what, I can show up. I can do bare minimum. No one's ever going to notice. Like there's there's no point here because I'm just exhausting myself. I get tired and I get upset that it's not appreciated or it doesn't make a difference. Then what's the point? And I realized as I did bare minimum, I was so much happier. And not to say that everyone's doing bare minimum, but things still go on. The company still survives. See, this is quite quitting, not quite cracking. But I didn't want to quit.

[00:26:03]>> No, but quiet quitting is not leading.

[00:26:05]>> So is quiet cracking a precursor to quiet quitting?

[00:26:08]>> Yes, I think so.

[00:26:08]>> So quiet is the stage before >> quiet cracking. Quiet quitting then actually quit.

[00:26:13]>> Yeah. Okay. Okay.

[00:26:14]>> Okay. Then burnout is like here burnout is >> I think burnout is navigating whether you want to leave or not. And that's why there's that push and pull.

[00:26:22]>> Okay. No, no. I think right quiet cracking >> this episode. Quiet cracking first. Then after that you have a fork.

[00:26:30]>> Then one different route one choose your puff.

[00:26:35]>> Route one is burnout. Burn out then you collapse and you crumble.

[00:26:38]>> Right. Route two, right, is you quiet quit.

[00:26:40]>> Yeah. Yeah.

[00:26:41]>> Then after that um both routes combine back into quitting.

[00:26:46]>> Okay. Then I'm going to ask the next question. Do you think all of this affect team morale >> or do you think one affects team morale lesser than the other?

[00:26:54]>> No. affect equally, right?

[00:26:56]>> I think they all affect team morale unless the whole team is checked out because for them checks. Yeah. Is the I'm fine.

[00:27:04]>> I'm good. Yeah. Five. Like how's your day been? Great. You don't you don't want to say like oh okay because if you say oh okay then it's a whole you need to explain why it's okay.

[00:27:12]>> Yeah. Yeah. Unless you're ready to sit down and really expand on that and then say okay I need a change in this correct >> system. Do you think Singaporeans are very good at pretending?

[00:27:21]>> No.

[00:27:22]>> No.

[00:27:22]>> Not really.

[00:27:23]>> No. I think they their face their face damn obvious like I know when someone's unhappy someone's stressed >> and I know when someone coasting also >> ah damn obvious >> and there are some workplaces right in Singapore where because they're what we call iron rice bowl jobs right very obvious when people are are coasting >> okay what do you mean by iron rice >> cannot get fired no matter how poorly you perform cannot get fired >> super troublesome or m fun to fire you there are some places I heard >> the admin take it takes like 2 years to to fire someone >> you need to actually write a whole report, right, for why this person should and then you must put them on a PIP and then they must fail this PIP in a very specific way and then after which you go for another evaluation and >> so so basically toxic workplaces happen because people are lazy.

[00:28:10]>> Correct.

[00:28:10]>> They lazy to fire the incompetent people.

[00:28:13]>> Yeah. And then because it's >> true >> because of this right these people who are coasting right they take up one head count. So you cannot even replace >> you cannot even replace them. I hear I also choir crack.

[00:28:24]>> No, because when you look at it this way, it is a system that is not designed to help you.

[00:28:30]>> You know what I mean? You see it as a I am so small >> and there's no way I can make a difference or or change a situation. I can choose to either continue grumbling and go through my 9 to5 or I can just step out and use my energy elsewhere in my 9 to5. And I would take that we we all do what we need to survive. Yeah, I think actually a lot of people do realize that you need to pick your battles and some battles are not just not worth fighting because you know that you will ultimately lose.

[00:28:56]>> Agree.

[00:28:57]>> And that's why you buy blind box >> sorry >> to put at your office desk.

[00:29:02]>> Genuinely I think that people are coping with work stress right by during lunch break they buy things and they or like they decorate their deskpop.

[00:29:09]>> Yeah. They decorate their desk so that you know what this is this was for me.

[00:29:13]>> Beyond work right how does quiet cracking show up in someone's life? So, for example, does it affect your energy outside of work? When you hang out with friends, when you show up to a podcast and talk about adultting struggles, does that happen to you?

[00:29:28]>> Not really, I think. Does it? Let me >> It affects us. What do you mean? The three of us have >> It definitely have been affected.

[00:29:37]>> Our energy levels have dropped significantly since >> I thought I thought it's cuz we've matured.

[00:29:42]>> Okay. I mean, we've aged.

[00:29:43]>> Yeah, >> that's one. But I do think that recent years our work has piled up all three of us.

[00:29:48]>> I think also it becomes very apparent to me um that I'm very tired right when I'm picky of who I hang out with. So I will only start hanging out with people that I know I can be brain dead around. Like I can sit with my posture ra like full scoliosis on the couch you know >> don't need to talk to and I don't need to think. Yeah, that's how I know I'm starting to lose it because I have zero capacity to have to perform or like if I have to think about the next question to ask you.

[00:30:19]>> Yeah.

[00:30:20]>> Yeah.

[00:30:21]>> Oh, I mentioned this to you the other day um during supper. I was like, am I losing myself?

[00:30:27]>> I also have been talking to my closest friends and my partner about it. Like I feel a bit sad that I'm no longer that version of myself where I'm like, let's go, let's hang out. you know, as in I I feel like I'm true to myself right now, but I don't think it's healthy to be so alone, like so distant from the people you love.

[00:30:51]>> Yeah, I agree.

[00:30:52]>> So, I do think that it affects my life that way.

[00:30:54]>> Sometimes it's not about capacity also, right? It's about just the the mood >> means >> cuz I feel like actually I do have capacity to hang out with people even if I am feeling like that stress network stress >> but you're just not in the right mood.

[00:31:08]It could also be like you're a bit avoidant because you feel like if you meet up with people, people ask you about work, people ask you how things are going. Like for example, we do this podcast now, I ask like how we open this episode, right? How are your then it's always like ah it >> Yeah. Everyone's exhausted. I I don't think >> my my own set is enough, you know?

[00:31:25]>> Yeah. Then when everyone's set come together, right? Yeah.

[00:31:28]>> It's just not a good thing. Like >> I don't know. I think every time my friends and I whenever we're all drained, it makes the hangout quite >> draining.

[00:31:36]>> Draining.

[00:31:37]>> Yeah. Oh, >> it makes the hang out quite dreadful actually. I feel like the conversation doesn't lead to anything happy >> and then it makes me feel worse when I go home.

[00:31:45]>> Yeah.

[00:31:46]>> So that's why maybe sometimes I avoid certain friend groups that >> during that season >> I like to complain >> like to complain about work all the time. I cannot I think that is the difference cuz when my friends and I all tired then we're just like let's do just do a brain raw hang, right? We just don't talk about anything that is too deep.

[00:32:02]>> Okay. So there's another Reddit thread titled working adults in Singapore. How do you cope? I'm a working adult in a 9 to6 office job. I feel incredibly bored and exhausted. It is just work and home.

[00:32:14]I feel nothing to look forward to. Life is just this cycle for the next few decades.

[00:32:19]>> Well, the decades thing really scares me all the time.

[00:32:22]>> Actually, this kind of people I feel like very pessimistic.

[00:32:24]>> But it's the reality of the reality of the life in Singapore.

[00:32:29]>> But I can find things to do. No, man. As I'm giving this person benefit of doubt that for example they OT until 7 8 p.m.

[00:32:36]then they have to go home. They go home then repeat repeat repeat every single day and then there's nothing else that they can really look forward to after work right because work takes up so much of their life >> and the whole conversation about having this vision of you know repeating this for a few decades right I mean it's >> all Singaporeans are talking about this like when can we actually retire? Do you relate to this or do you think quiet cracking can look um different for different people?

[00:33:02]>> Okay, first of all, I feel like I I define my quiet cracking as one day like a day a day or like a week.

[00:33:09]>> I wouldn't see it as a few months.

[00:33:11]>> So, I can quiet crack today but tomorrow I'm okay. When it comes back to this what whatever this guy mentioned, maybe I don't really feel as worried about repeating this routine for decades because I feel like I'm someone who is always going to look for something new.

[00:33:26]I would never want to stay at the same position or the same role for multiple years. If there's no change, I'm not growing. I'm not excited about life. I would not stay. Yeah. But maybe this guy is coasting like he's going with the flow.

[00:33:39]>> Yeah. So that's what I mean by like a lot of a lot of the times I feel like it's because they go with the flow then you feel like that.

[00:33:46]>> You're saying that they have to make a change in their routine. If not, they will always be stuck.

[00:33:50]>> Yeah. And it might even be small things, right? Saturday, Sundays, like switch up how you spend the day. I think it's harder for people who are only coming into themselves a bit later in life.

[00:34:00]>> Um especially in Singapore where individuality is so discouraged or rather not celebrated.

[00:34:06]You are always told to blend in and follow the crowd. If you want to excel, it's quite isolating. And if you have a social life through that is usually because of CCA or you are in a a club that's more social. But if you're really in an academic path and you are already inherently not a very sociable person, then I can totally see how you would be very alienated and bored because now you've already gotten there. But in order to maintain the current um maybe the house you have or the current like bills you have to pay, you have to keep continuing with the work cycle. And then maybe all this while you have no time for social activities, right? It's very hard to start now. I think for us is is a bit hard to see cuz we'll take matters into our own hands and if we're unhappy we'll make a change but I think making change so radically like that is is a very big risk for a lot of people cuz there's no backup plan and there are a lot of people who are also go to a social mixer I'm alone you know maybe they they don't have as much social experience and I always feel very sad cuz I see this a lot and to us it's so simple go to go to someone do a handshake say your name but that in itself if they approach in a weird or not normal way, >> the person on the receiving end will just be like, "Okay, cool. I don't vibe with you, right?"

[00:35:24]>> But they're trying.

[00:35:26]>> So, I feel like it can be so hard. I think especially in social with social media now, all they're scrolling is that people who are working and then they have a social life, then it just makes you feel like everything I'm doing and I'm trying will never amount to what I want to get. So, that's how I feel the cycle of quiet cracking starts cuz there's no solution.

[00:35:44]>> Okay. So, actually quiet cracking I think in today's context, right? A lot of it is also driven by fear. There's fear of losing your job. I feel like a lot of people feel like job security now is not great. A lot of uh employees, right? They are responding to quiet cracking or they are responding to this fear by doing what people call career cushioning. So they're building out career safety nets in terms of you know networking constantly, updating their CV constantly, upskilling constantly, >> which you know it can go both ways. It sounds exhausting.

[00:36:17]>> On one hand, it feels like, oh okay, I have a bit more of like an insurance, right? So then that alleviates the fear a bit more, but then all of these things also take up more capacity.

[00:36:25]>> Yeah, it's kind of like being a primary school kid and then having the textbook not be enough. You still need to go for like tuition for like three subjects just to do well and fight the bell curve. Maybe sometimes I don't really feel the need to do all of this that you mentioned because I feel like media industry is a bit different.

[00:36:42]>> In what sense? Some jobs cannot be replaced all.

[00:36:45]>> Oh, true.

[00:36:46]>> Like the human aspect of you know doing a shoot production coming up with content ideas. Yes, you can come go to AI websites to get ideas but >> like the the little details >> the nuance the nuance for what we do in terms of like YouTube content or social content is >> Yeah. Yeah. I think generally social media content I think very difficult to replace with AI completely. That's why I think for me and my scope of work, I don't feel the need to always like, okay, I need to upskill all the time as compared to someone who's maybe in >> tech. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:37:23]>> It's back to your point again. You can feel like you are in an endless loop, right? Until you really break down whether you are truly unhappy or you just like to complain about it. But I think when when you start venting, you also start losing like why you are venting. If you're venting because you're unhappy, we don't tend to be like, "Hey, actually it's been going great. I'm busy but I I love what I'm doing. We don't we're like >> I am very busy very busy but but good >> you know why because it's relatable like you know whining and complaining about a job is relatable versus flexing and saying that oh my job is great like things have been so good. I I think yes to maybe to some of your friend groups, right? They would be so happy for you.

[00:38:00]But >> maybe some people feel the need to be relatable by venting a little bit so that the others can feel accepted also >> because if you already know, right, that this whole group is suffering at their job >> and then you're here flexing about how life has been great, right? They will then look at you differently and they might feel like, hey, >> yeah, >> can you read the room? It's very interesting how people respond to busy.

[00:38:25]Sometimes you're like, "I'm very busy."

[00:38:26]Oh, good. Good to be busy. Like, good for you. Law that like if you're not busy, you're going to lose your job.

[00:38:32]>> Correct. I feel like it's it's something that we are conditioned to think, right, that you need to struggle in order for it to be perceived as hard work.

[00:38:40]>> You can work hard and do it efficiently at work so that you don't carry outside.

[00:38:45]>> But there are some people I see you very free after work very free. I'm like, >> but it's after work. I feel like we do need that that boundary and I think that people are being more vocal about it nowadays and I wonder if this will contribute to maybe a decline of quiet quitting.

[00:39:01]>> I find like a lot of times when you are online right or even in this kind of like catchups when people talk about work it's just very negative then I feel like it just breeds more negativity. It does >> like if you go on Reddit like all of these threads, right?

[00:39:14]>> It's always just like negative, negative, negative. Then you catch your friends and it's negative, negative.

[00:39:18]Then even if I might have been like on the fence about how I feel about work, right? Actually, >> now I'm starting to be negative, too.

[00:39:23]>> So, are you suggesting that people should should list out what they're grateful for, >> right?

[00:39:27]>> Oh my god, we need to do like journaling when you meet your friends.

[00:39:31]>> The new rule for the hot pot is whenever any of us ask um the other two how we are doing, right? We cannot say tired.

[00:39:37]We cannot say shack. We cannot say um exhausted brain are exhausted. No.

[00:39:41]>> Okay, let's start now. Nick, how do you feel?

[00:39:42]>> I feel great.

[00:39:43]>> What are you grateful for?

[00:39:44]>> I'm so grateful that I am, you know, gainfully employed and that I get to work with teams all over THE WORLD.

[00:39:52]>> WOW.

[00:39:52]>> AND EXPERIENCE different working cultures.

[00:39:55]>> Wow. You hear that? Okay. You better use this as an example to meet your friends and then share good things. Yeah.

[00:40:02]Actually, that made me feel instantly better.

[00:40:04]>> Did you Did you feel a little picked in your step? I feel like I'm a changed person.

[00:40:08]>> Oh my god, I'm uplifted, >> inspired.

[00:40:11]>> What about you, Q?

[00:40:13]>> Um, I'm grateful for you guys.

[00:40:15]>> Wow.

[00:40:16]>> Yeah. I mean, to like have been chatting with you guys for 3 years.

[00:40:19]>> Yeah.

[00:40:20]>> Um, I'm grateful for a life filled with people I love and people who love me.

[00:40:26]>> Wow.

[00:40:28]>> Yeah. you just piggybacking off of that, >> especially in this context, >> just circling back, I just want to piggy back off of that. Actually, I am also very grateful to love and be loved by like people around me that I have in my life, but also good to finally see some fruits of my labor after hustling like dog the past couple of years. I'm finally starting to see them come to fruition with like exciting jobs.

[00:40:53]>> Joey has been booked and busy. So happy for her. Okay, so in that same Reddit thread, right, um, another user sums it up quite nicely. You will continue to feel bored and exhausted and have nothing to look forward to until you find out what is meaningful to you.

[00:41:09]>> Thanks.

[00:41:09]>> So whether that is your chosen profession, passion, relationships, community work, selfmastery, and so on.

[00:41:16]Uh, you will still be exhausted sometimes, but you will finally know what makes it all worthwhile. So to wrap things up, right, what should listeners take away from this? Yeah, like what you mentioned, find something that fills your cup in other means. It could be a hobby, it could be a side project. As someone who really did pursue a passion project, I think I can attest to that.

[00:41:36]It it really does bring a different sense of fulfillment. It almost feels like a second job. And then this second job exposes you to new skills, new people and new environments. And then actually that excite that will become quite exciting.

[00:41:50]>> I would say the grass is greener where you water it. Of course it you know you cannot compare your journey to someone else's and work should be a little hard.

[00:42:00]I think we have lost the essence of work and a job like it is a job. You are supposed to feel um a bit of friction cuz that's where growth happens. Yeah. I think you need to be honest with yourself on whether you are willing to put in the work otherwise it just might not be the right fit.

[00:42:19]>> Thanks so much for joining us on this episode of the hot pot. You can listen to us on Spotify, Apple Podcast, and we listen.

[00:42:24]>> And subscribe to our channel here, as well as join our Telegram channel if you haven't already.

[00:42:30]>> And we'll see you on the next episode.

[00:42:32]>> Bye.

[00:42:33]>> Oh, sorry. I need to sneeze.

[00:42:38]>> That was so dear.

[00:42:39]>> Really? Is it >> the >> I you know, I always pray like don't like when people do that.

[00:42:48]People like their heart will stop or the eyebrow your eyebrow >> or their eyeball will pop