The most shocking statement in the Bible

Hinzugefügt: 2026-05-09

[00:00:00]I said, "What is the most powerful, the most inspiring, the most the most awesome statement in the entire Torah?"

[00:00:11]He said, "Love your neighbor as yourself."

[00:00:19]I said, "You find that awesome?"

[00:00:23]He says, "Yeah."

[00:00:25]I said, I think it's preposterous.

[00:00:30]Love your neighbor as yourself.

[00:00:33]Let's see.

[00:00:36]I should love my neighbors children as much as I love my children.

[00:00:45]I think I would have some very unhappy children.

[00:00:53]And so would my friend because he also loves my children more than his children.

[00:01:00]Well, maybe not more equally.

[00:01:04]See, the objective is to love your neighbor as much as you love yourself.

[00:01:11]It's a very dangerous concept because let's say I love my neighbor's wife as much as I love my wife.

[00:01:27]very dangerous because the tendency is if I'm going to love her, I'll probably love her more than my wife cuz she doesn't cost me anything.

[00:01:48]She doesn't snore at night.

[00:01:54]very dangerous concept this love your neighbor business.

[00:02:02]So look at what happens and this is really serious because even without the Torah that you know the the conventional wisdom is that we have to love everybody equally. We're all the same. We're all okay. So I love my neighbor's wife as much as I love my wife. And then it becomes a little more.

[00:02:25]Now my neighbor loves my wife more than he loves his wife because my wife doesn't cost him anything.

[00:02:35]So now I love his wife more and he loves my life, my wife more. Why don't we just switch?

[00:02:47]Oh, but that won't work. Because as soon as we switch, I want my wife back because now she doesn't cost me anything.

[00:02:58]Do you see where this is going?

[00:03:04]The conclusion of all of this is that the culprit and the problem is marriage.

[00:03:11]Marriage got to go.

[00:03:15]See, if nobody married anybody, then we could all love each other equally and there would be no problem.

[00:03:27]So marriage is the culprit.

[00:03:35]And of course, same is true with children.

[00:03:38]I love my neighbor's children as much as I love my children. Actually, I love them a lot more because they don't cost me anything and I can leave whenever they get on my nerves.

[00:03:57]So maybe we should switch children.

[00:04:01]But that wouldn't work either, right?

[00:04:03]Because as soon as we switch So what's the problem? problem is having children.

[00:04:16]So the problem is that your children are your children and your spouse is your spouse. Well, that's got to go.

[00:04:26]That's what's causing all the problems.

[00:04:30]Nothing should be mine. Nothing should be yours.

[00:04:36]So a long time ago the sages said there are people who have a philosophy what is mine is yours and what is yours is mine.

[00:04:50]Some say that is very generous.

[00:04:53]Others say that is a total ignoramis.

[00:05:02]What do you think?

[00:05:06]How beautiful is this attitude? What's mine is yours and what's yours is mine.

[00:05:13]We share equally.

[00:05:22]Well, the reason that that doesn't work out so well is if what is yours is mine and what is mine is yours, then nothing is mine and nothing is yours.

[00:05:35]If it was mine and I give it to you, well, that's very noble.

[00:05:42]But if it's not mine, it's yours. And yours is not yours, it's mine.

[00:05:50]And there is no charity. There is no sharing. There is no giving.

[00:06:11]So what is the ideal attitude?

[00:06:14]What is yours is yours and I have no rights to it whatsoever.

[00:06:21]And what is mine is a little bit yours.

[00:06:30]That's beautiful.

[00:06:35]What is mine is mine and what is yours is a little bit mine.

[00:06:42]That's a criminal mind.

[00:06:48]What is yours is yours. What is mine is mine.

[00:06:53]That's a law-abiding citizen but not very friendly.

[00:07:05]So the sages say there are there these four kinds of mentalities. What is mine is mine and what is yours is mine.

[00:07:13]That's just a criminal.

[00:07:16]What is yours is yours and what is mine is a little bit yours. That's beautiful.

[00:07:23]What is mine is mine and what is yours is yours. That's just standard.

[00:07:33]And what is yours is mine and what is mine is yours. That's just stupid.

[00:07:39]Ignoramis.

[00:07:53]So what's with this love your neighbor as yourself? It doesn't sound like a very good idea in practice. In theory, it's beautiful.

[00:08:05]But as soon as you try to practice it, everything falls apart.

[00:08:22]Another question somehow related.

[00:08:27]God says, "I put before you today good and life, evil and death.

[00:08:36]Choose life."

[00:08:41]Now I'm completely confused. If I'm supposed to choose my life, how do I love you as much as myself?

[00:08:54]So God is saying that you should be as important to me as I am to myself, but my life comes first.

[00:09:02]Well, I just undid the whole thing.

[00:09:14]Like that famous joke about the Lone Ranger and Tanto. You know the joke?

[00:09:21]The Lone Ranger and Tanto are surrounded by Indians.

[00:09:26]And Tanto says, "Boy, are we in trouble?"

[00:09:30]The Lone Ranger says, "Boy, are we in trouble?" And Tanto says, "Who's we, white man?

[00:09:36]I was your best friend till now, but my life comes first." So, so what is this? Love your neighbor as yourself, unless you have to save yourself.

[00:09:58]So does it actually say choose your life?

[00:10:05]Doesn't say that.

[00:10:07]Says choose life.

[00:10:11]No one needs to be told to choose their own life.

[00:10:16]We're sufficiently selfish. We're sufficiently egotistical. No one needs to tell me to choose my life.

[00:10:27]Choose life means life is greater than any one individual.

[00:10:41]So be prolife for everybody.

[00:10:48]Now, I love my children far more than I love my neighbor's children.

[00:10:56]But when it comes to life, the life of my neighbor's children is any less valuable than the life of my children.

[00:11:10]So, I'm going to take care of my children first because I love them, not because their life is more important.

[00:11:22]If I can give some charity, I'll give it to my community before I give it to a other community because my community is important to me.

[00:11:35]But that's just me in principle. Is the other community any less important than my community? Do I just cuz it's mine?

[00:12:01]What does it mean? Love your neighbor as yourself.

[00:12:05]It doesn't mean you shouldn't love your family more than you love strangers.

[00:12:11]That's that's barbaric.

[00:12:21]What does it mean as you love yourself?

[00:12:25]As much as you love yourself.

[00:12:32]How in the world do we measure that?

[00:12:41]And how are you so sure I love myself?

[00:12:48]What if I don't love myself? Then I shouldn't love my neighbor.

[00:12:58]So obviously the Torah assumes you love yourself. Now can you include others in that love and love them as long as you're loving anyway?

[00:13:12]So as you love yourself doesn't mean as much as you love yourself. But as you go about loving yourself, include others.

[00:13:27]You're precious to yourself.

[00:13:30]Others should be precious, too.

[00:13:36]You worry when things are not going well for you. Why don't you worry about someone else when it's not going well for them?

[00:13:46]So, we're not really talking about romantic love. We're not talking about personal love.

[00:13:55]We're talking about how how protective are you of yourself? How precious are you to yourself in those areas? Why only you?

[00:14:20]So the word love can be used in many different many different contexts.

[00:14:28]You don't love your neighbor the way you love your children or your wife or your parents.

[00:14:39]It would be wrong to not distinguish, to not have a special love for parents, a unique love for a spouse, and a a love appropriate for children of your own. Of course, those things should be different.

[00:15:08]But that's a very subjective love.

[00:15:14]You don't love yourself subjectively.

[00:15:21]You love yourself instinctively.

[00:15:26]Well, if it's instinctive, then you can apply it universally because it's not because it's not personal.

[00:15:51]Put it in different words.

[00:15:53]There are times a person hates himself.

[00:16:00]During those times, he doesn't need to love anybody else.

[00:16:09]See, even when you hate yourself, you have an instinctive survival instinct that would make you protect yourself even while you hate yourself.

[00:16:25]Somebody says, "I hate myself. I hate myself. I'm disgusting. I can't look at myself." Try slapping him.

[00:16:36]He will instinctively withdraw, right?

[00:16:41]Or put his hand up to block. So, why' you do that? Why' you do that?

[00:16:48]Why are you protecting yourself? You hate yourself.

[00:16:54]So even when we hate ourselves, we still protect ourselves. Is that some kind of a love?

[00:17:09]This woman told me that she was going to because she doesn't care anymore. She hates herself. Blah blah blah blah.

[00:17:20]I said, "When is the last time you fell out of bed at night in your sleep? You just rolled off the bed."

[00:17:29]She says, "I don't do that." I said, "Why not?

[00:17:35]You're asleep.

[00:17:37]How is it that even while you're asleep, you're careful not to roll off the bed?"

[00:17:46]Because as much as you hate yourself, you take good care of yourself. In fact, you put on makeup this morning.

[00:17:58]Who hates themselves and puts on makeup?

[00:18:07]Is that romantic love? No. Is that passionate love? No. Is that even pleasant love also? No.

[00:18:17]But if it's not love, what is it?

[00:18:25]So there's a love where I find you lovable.

[00:18:29]There's a love where I find you significant.

[00:18:42]So why don't we call that respect?

[00:18:47]Jeff, I find you significant. I obviously respect you.

[00:18:51]It's not respect.

[00:18:54]I don't know you. Why would I respect you?

[00:18:59]And yet, without knowing your name, without knowing who you are, if you get into trouble, I'm going to have to stop and help you.

[00:19:09]Why?

[00:19:15]because you're significant. I can't just ignore you.

[00:19:21]I can't call that respect.

[00:19:26]I can't call it love either. I don't love you.

[00:19:29]In fact, don't get into accidents when I'm around. I don't want to be bothered.

[00:19:40]So, what do we call it?

[00:19:44]You are significant.

[00:19:47]I don't know you. I don't like you. But you are significant.

[00:19:54]So in a kind of a loose sense, we call it love.

[00:20:03]What we really should call it is fear.

[00:20:09]Remember we talked about this What does it mean that if you're if if I see somebody in trouble, I see somebody hurting, somebody hurt, I can't ignore it and walk away. I can't I see someone drowning. I can't I can't leave.

[00:20:33]I'm not a lifeguard.

[00:20:37]I'm not sure I can save the guy.

[00:20:43]But I can't walk away.

[00:20:48]So if I'm not a good swimmer, I'm going to scream and shout until I find somebody who can save him. But I can't walk away indifferent.

[00:20:57]Why?

[00:21:01]And what is that compulsion?

[00:21:06]What compels me to stay?

[00:21:11]It's certainly not love because I don't know you.

[00:21:21]It's not respect. I don't know you.

[00:21:29]In a very real way, anything that compels me is a form of fear.

[00:21:41]Because fear doesn't mean outwardly afraid to get hurt.

[00:21:52]That's that's the most basic. That's the most materialistic form of fear.

[00:22:03]Fear simply means there are forces stronger than me against which I am helpless.

[00:22:12]Is that a good definition of fear?

[00:22:18]It's not just a guy who can hit me over the head with a with a brick.

[00:22:23]Anything that is stronger than me against which I am helpless produces a feeling of fear.

[00:22:39]Anything that makes me feel small and weak, that's fear.

[00:22:46]I'm afraid to take a test. Nobody's going to hit me over the head with a brick.

[00:22:56]But failing the test is too scary. Why?

[00:23:05]Because I don't have a choice.

[00:23:08]I have to pass the test.

[00:23:14]And sometimes that's true and sometimes it's just in my mind.

[00:23:20]But anything that makes me feel weak is the experience of fear because if it's stronger than me then it humbles me.

[00:23:40]Love makes me feel rich.

[00:23:43]Love makes me feel full, significant, substantial.

[00:23:51]When I'm in love, I'm so real, top of the world.

[00:23:59]Fear means I feel insignificant.

[00:24:03]I feel vulnerable. I feel tiny.

[00:24:07]I am not me because there's something stronger taking over.

[00:24:16]So if I am compelled to stay and take care of a guy who's drowning or a baby that has been abandoned, what do I call that overwhelming force?

[00:24:33]I can't call it love.

[00:24:36]Fear.

[00:24:39]Now what happens when you are afraid?

[00:24:47]Flight or fight?

[00:24:52]Flight. I understand.

[00:24:55]Just get out of there. Go away. Get away. Go. Okay, that makes perfect sense. What do you mean fight?

[00:25:08]How can I fight something I'm afraid of?

[00:25:11]If I'm afraid of it, it means it makes me feel weak and small. How am I going to fight something that I'm weak and small against this thing that is big and powerful?

[00:25:24]So fighting when I'm afraid is totally irrational.

[00:25:35]Why is that an option?

[00:25:42]Turns out that when you're afraid, you can fight a lot better than when you're in love.

[00:25:53]When you're afraid of something, which means you feel compelled, then you become as strong as the need demands.

[00:26:16]If I have to beat up Goliath, Then I just might because that compelling force is stronger than me might say a little simplistically the reason David defeated Goliath is because Goliath was not afraid. need and David was afraid.

[00:27:00]So Goliath was coming secure in his strength and relying on who he is to win the battle.

[00:27:15]David fought the battle motivated by the desperate need to win.

[00:27:27]That need to win is as strong as the need to win which is much stronger than King David.

[00:27:46]Like the example of a person who can lift a car off a child to save the child's life.

[00:27:53]He can lift a car.

[00:27:59]If he was motivated by the love of the child, he would not be able to pick up the car.

[00:28:11]Because love means you're being yourself, your best self. And your best self cannot pick up a car.

[00:28:24]But when you have this compelling feeling, I c I can't just leave the kid there. Can't can't. Well, then you become as strong as the need cuz that's what's motivating you. So if the need is to pick up a car, you pick up the car.

[00:28:44]I mean, what else am I going to do?

[00:28:48]So you ask somebody who picked a car up to save a child, how how did you do that?

[00:28:54]I don't know, but what else should I have done?

[00:29:02]In fact, if the person stops to think, let's see, how much does that car way?

[00:29:09]There's no way he could do it anymore because he's being reasonable.

[00:29:22]A reasonable person cannot pick up a car.

[00:29:33]Somebody asked one of the great from Russia, "How were you able to resist all the pressure, all the torture, all the threats of the communists? eight years in the gulag in the labor camps and you never you never violated Shabas.

[00:29:50]How did you do that?

[00:29:55]He says, "How did I do it? If you were there, you would have done it."

[00:30:02]You had to do it. So, you did it. If you were there, you would have to do it. So, you would do it.

[00:30:09]Of course, I don't buy that for a minute. But at least the idea in principle that's true.

[00:30:22]If there's something you must do, you are as strong as that must, which is much stronger than you.

[00:30:35]And the funny thing is the guy who picks up the car off the child a few days later finds himself trapped under a car.

[00:30:46]Shouldn't he be able to pick it up?

[00:30:52]No, he can't pick it up.

[00:30:56]So to save the child, he can pick up the car. To save himself, he can't.

[00:31:02]I've never heard of a anybody picking a car off off themselves.

[00:31:18]Because if it's yourself trapped under the car, you would be motivated to pick up the car out of self-love. Love can't pick up cars.

[00:31:34]So fear is much stronger than love, unless you're afraid of pain, which is really just another way of loving yourself.

[00:31:54]So, getting back to the to the Torah, we're reading the Torah and we're finding out what it is that God needs.

[00:32:07]If I really thought that God needed something, could anything stop me?

[00:32:17]That's called the fear of heaven.

[00:32:22]Fear of God or fear of heaven means if this is what God wants, then how could I not?

[00:32:43]God asked the Jewish people, "Will you accept my commandments?" They said, "Yes.

[00:32:50]Ask them afterwards, why'd you say yes?

[00:32:56]Why did you agree?

[00:33:02]613 commandments and you agree.

[00:33:06]What would their answer be?

[00:33:09]What was I supposed to do? Say, "No, it's bigger than me. I I I had no choice. I had to say yes.

[00:33:22]It's God talking.

[00:33:32]That's called a fear of heaven. Not fear of what God could do to you.

[00:33:40]That's not fear of heaven. That's fear of pain.

[00:33:48]Fear of heaven means once I know that this is important to God, how how could I not?

[00:34:02]If I find an abandoned baby, I cannot walk away. I must stay and see to the baby.

[00:34:13]How can I not?

[00:34:17]And that's just a baby.

[00:34:21]But if it's God, it should be infinitely more compelling.

[00:34:29]How could I walk away from God?

[00:34:47]So yes, there's a mitzvah to love God.

[00:34:55]But isn't that funny?

[00:35:00]If I don't love you, how can you demand I love you?

[00:35:12]And some guy walks over and says, "You have to love me." Excuse me.

[00:35:25]What does that mean?

[00:35:30]So obviously before God can ask you to love me, you first have to be in awe of him.

[00:35:42]Otherwise, who is he to tell you what to love, who to love, when to love?

[00:35:51]When you're in awe of God and you can't walk away, God says, "Please don't Don't do it out of fear. Do it out of love.

[00:36:14]When someone you find awesome says, "Love me," that is a very inviting invitation.

[00:36:36]And that's why we teach our children.

[00:36:38]One of the first things we teach a child is to say, "The beginning of all wisdom is the fear of God."

[00:36:52]And of course, the obvious question is, why are you starting off with fear?

[00:36:59]Why don't we tell our children the beginning of all wisdom is to love God?

[00:37:06]Cuz that's not the beginning of wisdom.

[00:37:07]That's stupid. What are you loving? Who are you loving?

[00:37:12]Who is he to say you should love me?

[00:37:25]It is wise to begin with fear.

[00:37:58]That's what we're supposed to develop when we learn Torah.

[00:38:08]How could you not?

[00:38:13]And the how could you not has also has many layers. How could you not do for God when he is the creator and he is the master of the whole universe?

[00:38:29]for how could you not when you realize how important it is to him and how uncomfortable it makes him when you sin and how much pleasure he gets when you do a mitzvah. How how could you not?

[00:38:51]or after all he's done for you and you expect him to continue doing and do even more. How could you not?

[00:39:06]If someone loves you that much, how could you not?

[00:39:20]So you get to choose which how could you not do you prefer because he's big and powerful because it means so much to him or because he's done so much for