Getting through Mother's Day

Added: 2026-05-12

[00:00:01]Hello and welcome back to my channel.

[00:00:04]Today we're talking about Mother's Day.

[00:00:06]Can you believe it? Can you believe it's coming around again? It is tomorrow.

[00:00:12]Today is Saturday afternoon.

[00:00:16]And um I know Mother's Day can be a very hard day for a lot of people.

[00:00:21]So I thought I would do a check-in and check with everybody, see how everybody is doing. Maybe you could leave a comment. Let me know if you have any plans for Mother's Day. Maybe you have grandchildren that you're going to be seeing or other children or maybe just, you know, go out to eat, do something nice.

[00:00:44]Um, for others, it's going to be rough and I absolutely understand that, especially if you're if you're fairly new to estrangement. You know, it it's hard. I I'm not going to lie. It is very hard and I think this this holiday can be one of the hardest things of all.

[00:01:07]It's kind of right up there with Christmas, right? I think in some ways it can be worse than Christmas because Christmas always to me includes um first and foremost, right? the the religious aspect of Christmas and also you your friends and family and the decorations and the music and um I I usually can find joy in Christmas.

[00:01:30]Mother's Day is exactly what it is. It's focusing right on mothers, right?

[00:01:37]So, let me tell you a little bit of my background. Um, my mother passed in 20 when did she pass?

[00:01:50]2001 on Mother's Day.

[00:01:54]Yeah, she died on Mother's Day. My son was 13 at the time and um it was hard. It was very hard.

[00:02:06]But I always said that she was a wonderful mom and it was kind of fitting that she passed on Mother's Day because she was a great mom. That's like I how I like to remember her and think about her and I do think about her a lot. I talk to her sometimes. I talk to her picture and uh I feel like, you know, both my parents are are with me. you know, I do feel that way even though they're they're both deceased, you know. So, when my mom passed in 2001 on Mother's Day after that, Mother's Day was not the same for me. Uh even though, you know, I had a son and and you know, he'd always say, "Happy Mother's Day, give me a card." Sometimes I got a present, sometimes I didn't. But you know, he was living with me and he was young and um but what happened as a few years went by, he was about maybe 16 and he worked in a restaurant in our town and of course Mother's Day is like the busiest day of the year in a restaurant in all restaurants, right? Except for maybe McDonald's and even then maybe it's crowded. I don't know. I don't think I've been to a McDonald's on Mother's Day, but that's probably crowded as well, right? If your mom likes m uh McDonald's, then that's where you're going to take her, right? Of course, that makes sense. So, and maybe going with the grandkids and they love McDonald's. So, you know, even though it's not kids day, of course, it's kids day every day, right?

[00:03:51]So, but um so I would have a double whammy. I knew my son had to work. I didn't want to make him feel guilty and and um he'd say happy Mother's Day before he'd go out the door cuz he'd have to go in early, you know, early in the morning and he would be gone till maybe 600 7:00 at night, you know. So, I pretty much, you know, I got in a real funk there for a few years between my mother's passing and and just being alone all day, maybe feeling bad for myself. And I don't know, but I did notice, as with most situations, time heals all wounds. And as the years went by, it did get easier for me. But the first few years, uh, they were rough. I would say the first five years of Mother's Days, I I I always, um, I just dreaded it. I really did dread it, you know. But after that, it did start getting better. And I mean, you know, we all at some point, I think, have to deal with our parents passing, you know. Um, it's just a fact of life, you know.

[00:05:10]But now I have this arangement which I've had for I don't know going on six years now from my son. And um so it it kind of brought it all up again when we were first aranged like Mother's Day. Oh boy. You know, but um I I feel like I'm at a point where I can be okay with Mother's Day. I don't like it. I still don't like it.

[00:05:37]But I feel like I can get through it.

[00:05:41]You know, best thing for me is to not to concentrate on the Mother's Day aspect of the day. You know what I mean?

[00:05:51]Like um they had a little lunch in here this past week in my apartment complex.

[00:05:58]Mother's Day. I didn't go. I thought about it. I thought, "Oh, it'd be nice to see my neighbors."

[00:06:04]I couldn't do it because it's Mother's Day. I I I it was a celebration for Mother's Day and I thought I don't know, my heart wasn't in it.

[00:06:14]Maybe that's wrong. Maybe I should have went, but I didn't want to go. So, I I didn't go.

[00:06:21]And um tomorrow I may go to a friend's house for a little bit. We may just go out shopping maybe and and have some lunch somewhere.

[00:06:33]Otherwise, I'm going to stay home and maybe watch a movie or a couple movies, you know. And I do watch a lot of YouTube. I'm also on YouTube, but I watch a lot of YouTube. And uh there's some shopping uh people that do shopping hauls that I really enjoy watching.

[00:06:52]So, I may do that. You know, anything that will not focus on Mother's Day. I will always say happy Mother's Day to my mother in her picture.

[00:07:03]And um I'm not expecting a happy Mother's Day from my son. I'm not expecting a text. I'll let you know if I get one. I would love to get one, but I've known for some time that he he doesn't it's a very strange thing to say, but um I truly feel he doesn't think of me as a mother anymore. He has totally dis detached himself even though we have been texting. If you watch my channel, you know that we have had some interactions which I'm very happy about. But um like I said, he's very detached. He doesn't think of me, I don't think, as a mother. I I never hear mom or ma where years ago he would always text me, "Hi, mom. Hi, ma." And you know, I was mommy, then I was ma for many years. When he was a teenager, it was ma. Then he got into his 20s and I was back to being mom.

[00:08:03]So, and and now, you know, no, I'm He'll just text, but he doesn't call me anything, you know. So, and he hasn't for a very long time. So, it's a weird thing, but I just don't think he thinks of me. as as his mother or family anymore. He's Will that change? I would love it to change, but I don't know if it will, you know. So, what are you guys doing for Mother's Day? You know, I I hope that you have someone to spend it with or that you can, you know, occupy yourself and do something nice. I'm always saying that do something nice for yourself. Um, do what you feel like doing. You know, I think that's the best advice. And if you don't feel like doing something, don't do it because, you know, whether we like it or not, um, whether we're happy or not, you know, we were we are mothers. We were mothers. Fathers, Father's Day is coming up, too. I know.

[00:09:18]We were parents and um we deserve to be happy, you know, in the middle of all this. We we deserve to be happy.

[00:09:32]So, please leave me a comment. Let me know how you're doing. I'm just checking in today. See how everybody's doing.

[00:09:38]Tomorrow is Mother's Day.

[00:09:41]And um I'd love to hear from you. And um for anybody that's new here, my name is Jane and I am a mother of an adult son, but I am estranged. We are estranged from each other. Uh not my doing, his doing. And um which is the title of this channel is just a parent living with estrangement. I'm not a psychologist, a doctor or anything like that. I'm not a nurse. I'm not a medical provider. I'm just a parent who is living with estrangement and um trying to help other people get through it. And um so please, if you haven't subscribed, please subscribe. Give this ch this video a like. It'll help a lot. And it's all free.

[00:10:35]And maybe even a hype. If you see the hype button, I would love a hype. That's free also.

[00:10:41]It's all free. and it helps our channel so much. So, just want to say God bless you. Enjoy your day in any way that you can. At least I hope you can you can find some comfort in the day and uh maybe some healing and maybe reach out to somebody else if they're having a bad day or they're estranged.

[00:11:05]And I will see you in my next one. And uh do something nice for yourself because you deserve it. We all deserve it. All righty. Take care. Bye-bye.