She Had 12 Boyfriends and Asked if I Wanted to Be No.13 | EP 90 | OP Said Podcast

[00:00:00]Yesterday I went on the best date of my life.

[00:00:02]>> This is not a case for you to crack, sweetie pie.

[00:00:05]>> We've all had bad sex, guy and girl, by the way, but you don't have to sign up for more of it. She's an animal.

[00:00:11]>> [laughter] [music] >> Hi and welcome back to another episode of OP said pod. I am Marie and today is a dating episode.

[00:00:28]>> Hey and I'm Mel.

[00:00:30]>> And I'm May. I'm a Gemini. I like to go for walks in the park.

[00:00:33]>> Ah!

[00:00:35]Okay, [laughter] I'm a Taurus and I like to read sometimes.

[00:00:42]>> It's about dating, putting our dating profiles out there.

[00:00:46]>> What about you, Mel?

[00:00:47]>> I'm better in person.

[00:00:49]>> [laughter] >> We significantly >> Okay, so quick one before we get into it. We have some exciting news. The British Podcast Awards and Listeners Awards is now open. It is back and we need your help. It's the only award where you, the fans, get to actually vote, not a panelist, so we really need your vote.

[00:01:11]>> So no pressure, but kind of pressure.

[00:01:13]Open until the 23rd of July, it only takes 10 seconds, I promise. Link is below, just pop in your email, search OP said and vote. Your support means everything. Every repost, every share, every comment, it hasn't gone unnoticed.

[00:01:28]>> So go on, link below. Vote for your girls.

[00:01:31]>> So our first story is from the subreddit dating. Bad sex with a great guy.

[00:01:38]>> Ooh.

[00:01:39]>> I, 26 female, have been dating this guy, 40 male, for about 5 months and everything was going really well at first. We've had great dates. Our personalities compliment each other really well and we spend a lot of time together. The chemistry outside of sex is honestly amazing. The issue is that we recently started having sex a few weeks ago and it's been really disappointing.

[00:02:03]I didn't know his age when we first started dating, but I also didn't think 40 was an age where I'd run into sexual performance issues like this. He struggles to maintain an erection and that's still been the case even with performance enhancement. At first, oral wasn't great either. There was actual biting which caught me off guard, but I communicated >> [laughter] >> what I Last night he gave me really good oral, but the erection issue is still there. I honestly don't know what to do. I really like him, but sex is important to me. I want to talk to him about it, but I don't want to hurt his feelings. We recently had a conversation where I expressed some of my sexual needs, but I didn't fully address the erection issue because I wasn't sure how to bring it up kindly. I don't think sex is everything in a relationship, but it does matter and I'm worried this could become a bigger issue over time. I could really use some solid advice.

[00:03:08]>> [laughter] >> They have nothing. They're going to say in 3 2 1 leave. [laughter] >> No, no, no. Actually, no. I was going to say um you need to have that honest conversation with him and actually ask him what's good. Um and why sir can you not stay hard for long or get up at all?

[00:03:26]Um because he might be all in his head.

[00:03:29]There might There might be solutions.

[00:03:31]So, I would definitely say you need to have an honest conversation and if after that nothing changes, then I personally would be exiting stage door left. Um but apparently sex is not that important to you.

[00:03:46]So, that's what I got.

[00:03:48]Cuz it's very important to me.

[00:03:51]I >> [laughter] >> Up up up up Okay, after that conversation if nothing changes, then he can just be your number one eater and that's it.

[00:04:01]>> It's true. It's true.

[00:04:02]>> Let him like don't let go of him. Let him fulfill that role and then you find someone else who fulfills the rest if you still want to keep him around. I just think don't tie yourself to somebody who can't do the things you need. But also I Good on you, girl.

[00:04:22]>> [laughter] >> How you doing?

[00:04:24]How do you do that?

[00:04:26]How do you I >> that?

[00:04:29]>> [laughter] >> But also what >> That is Like you guys are saying I'm like what I do that?

[00:04:33]>> [laughter] >> I'm speechless because I don't know why I'd still have somebody around if they can't perform. And see that performance, the thing is with guys they start to get a bit angry and then they get resentful and they take it out on women.

[00:04:48]>> Yeah. Like I when I'm saying I'm blaming that he can't get up.

[00:04:51]>> I'm telling you from experience I had it with one of my ex. There was a a blip.

[00:04:55]It was a very small blip and it wasn't until after the blip that he said, "Oh, do you know what? It's just that I had work issues and I was taking it out on you." And I was like, "I knew that. I knew that." Cuz this is what happens. So you're early doors, you're early in, you can walk away. And I just think without sex, isn't it just friendship? Keep him as a friend.

[00:05:17]>> going to say that. I was going to say sometimes you might just need a friend.

[00:05:20]>> It's just friendship. Let him just be a friend. He can't perform for you the way that you need. And that's it.

[00:05:26]You can have the com- And he's even Imagine he's even taking performance enhancers and still nothing's happening.

[00:05:32]>> I don't know why we're not going to a doctor.

[00:05:35]>> No, why he's not. This isn't her issue.

[00:05:37]>> like when I say why are you not saying go to a doctor, my guy? Like why are you not going to a doctor?

[00:05:43]>> She needs to have that conversation with him.

[00:05:44]>> And the first thing that would be in that conversation is you need to go and see a doctor.

[00:05:49]>> Yeah.

[00:05:49]>> Because if natural sources are not helping, what are you doing here? You're going to run out of >> Natural way you got natural sources.

[00:05:56]>> Enhancements.

[00:05:58]>> Natural >> They're not all They're not all, yeah.

[00:06:00]>> might not be natural.

[00:06:01]>> But >> I'm just saying I think he needs to go and see a doctor, a professional in that area. This is not a case for you to crack, sweetie pie.

[00:06:09]>> [laughter] >> Uh yeah.

[00:06:11]>> I just think it's >> It's true. It's true. It's true.

[00:06:14]>> Nancy Drew >> Especially her as well.

[00:06:16]>> What?

[00:06:17]>> Like it's his problem.

[00:06:18]>> You're all crazy. I don't know why.

[00:06:19]>> Why why should she have to find a solution?

[00:06:21]>> Come back when you've sorted out.

[00:06:23]>> Yeah. If this dilemma was an emoji, it'd be like yikes.

[00:06:27]>> Yeah.

[00:06:28]>> If this dilemma was an [laughter] emoji, it'll be that African man holding his eye.

[00:06:33]>> Or that good gif.

[00:06:34]>> Ah.

[00:06:35]My god. No, thank you. Comment. He should see a doctor. It could be any number of issues. The important thing for you is how patient you're willing to be while he figures it out. OP, I'm a pretty patient person. I've always considered sex to be something that can get better over time, but never dealt with this particular issue before. I even coached him on oral and it's gotten extremely better. Thanks for the advice.

[00:07:02]I will definitely see if he can ask a doctor about this. Any ideas on how I should approach the conversation?

[00:07:08]Yo, you need to SEE A DOCTOR.

[00:07:10]>> [laughter] >> AND THEN GO >> [laughter] >> I'M JOKING. YOU NEED TO, you know, go to your >> a sensitive topic, especially especially for men.

[00:07:23]>> You need to like kiss him on the cheek.

[00:07:25]Be nice about it. You said you've got all the patience in the world.

[00:07:27]>> doing? Step by step.

[00:07:28]>> Yeah.

[00:07:29]>> Absolutely. No, no, you you don't need to do all that, but you do need to ask him at the beginning how long has this problem been going on and be honest.

[00:07:36]Because don't sit here and lie and tell me, "Oh, it's something going on for for like 1 month since I've been stressed with work. Work's quite heavy at the moment. No, just say like clearly, you know, what have you done to take it What have you What have you tried? What hasn't worked? Have you spoken to a doctor? So, it's not You don't even have to persuade him to go to a doctor. Just have you spoken to a doctor? I think you just need to almost talk to him like a friend. Like a friend would If you spot Yeah, if you spot an issue with a friend and you have concern about that issue, you come to them and you ask them, you know, like how long has this been going on for?

[00:08:10]>> Yeah.

[00:08:11]>> What can like What have you done to try and fix it?

[00:08:15]>> Yeah, yeah.

[00:08:15]>> That's what you need to do. It's not It's not so much about coming to him as his sexual partner. I think it's more of I think it's more of coming to him with concern, genuine concern, and taking care with your choice of words, and asking him about the issue. So, it's more about tackling the issue more than laying blame at him and saying, you know, sex is shit.

[00:08:37]>> Yeah, but she I don't even think that she thinks the sex is shit. She's saying that she only get to the sex.

[00:08:42]>> the sex is not great, no?

[00:08:44]>> No, she said the oral is not fantastic.

[00:08:46]>> of this?

[00:08:47]>> Yeah, the title says like >> Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, about sex. Good. Go on.

[00:08:50]>> Yeah, that's that's what I'm saying. So, So, it's actually So, it's actually bad sex. So, don't don't try and attack his manhood, either, because that's really easy if like I don't know if he gets a bit aggressive. Because he could He could get a bit annoyed and angry about it. Anyway.

[00:09:04]>> [laughter] >> And you're like, "Whoa. No, be gentle.

[00:09:08]Definitely be gentle." I wouldn't want anyone to handle anything that they might be thinking quite negatively about me in a negative way. So, you know, just be kind.

[00:09:17]>> But talk about it expeditiously. Like the sooner you talk about it, the sooner you can figure out whether you stay or leave. And bad sex is a good enough reason to >> It's soul-destroying, you know?

[00:09:26]>> It It's not good. Like >> It can It can affect your self-esteem, by the way.

[00:09:30]>> your day at work, and you're just thinking what >> It can really affect your self-esteem as a woman, as a person.

[00:09:36]>> It can ruin It ruins lives.

[00:09:40]>> Absolutely [laughter] not.

[00:09:42]Bad sex if we're just dating.

[00:09:45]>> I literally even had this conversation with Melinda the other day. I said, "I'm never going to have bad sex again, you know."

[00:09:49]>> Yeah.

[00:09:50]>> I agree.

[00:09:51]>> Yeah.

[00:09:51]>> Ever. We've all We've all had bad sex, guy and girl, by the way. We've all had bad experiences, but you don't have to sign up for more of it.

[00:09:59]>> [laughter] >> That's what I mean.

[00:10:01]>> Yeah, it sounds like you're in it for the long run, so good luck. Completely off topic, we know as much as 35% of you that watch this channel do not subscribe. If you could please hit that button, it would really help reach people just like yourselves. And don't forget you can follow us on TikTok, Snapchat, Facebook, and Instagram @OPsaidpodcast.

[00:10:21]>> Okay, so this dilemma is from Reddit OKCupid. Way back as a very horny 19-year-old virgin whose romantic experience peaked at kissing, I signed up for Friendster, the original social media battlefield.

[00:10:36]I've gone on one or two decent dates from meeting people online before. So, when a woman messaged me out of the blue asking me on a coffee date, I was feeling optimistic. She suggested a cafe near my house, so I ditched my buddies and a basketball game, headed home from school, and went to meet her.

[00:10:53]Immediately, I noticed something. Her profile pic only showed her face with absolutely no context for the rest of her appearance. She turned out to be under 5'10" with a buzzed pixie cut, multiple piercings, tattoos, and somehow gave the energy of a goth elementary school student. None of that was automatically a deal-breaker. I was just surprised. She was super upbeat, but I noticed she would switch from excited to weirdly forceful in seconds.

[00:11:21]It wasn't enough that she insisted on buying my coffee. No, I must also have coffee cake.

[00:11:28]She would handle everything. At 19, free food sounded like a win, so I rolled with it. Conversation was mostly standard first date stuff until she suddenly decided she was bored and wanted to relocate to a nearby park. We get there, I hop on the swings. That's when she reaches out and starts running her fingers through my hair. Now, if you had asked a 19-year-old me beforehand whether having a woman unexpectedly play with my hair sounded great, I would have said absolutely. In reality, I have never felt more uncomfortable on a date.

[00:12:01]So, I naturally started swinging higher and higher to create physical distance.

[00:12:06]While airborne, trying to escape, she casually tells me she currently has 12 boyfriends and one girlfriend.

[00:12:14]>> [laughter] >> She said, "You don't want to be number 13?"

[00:12:19]>> [laughter] >> Oh, she does.

[00:12:21]And asked, "Would you like to be number 13?"

[00:12:24]>> Oh, wow.

[00:12:25]>> I asked whether they all knew about each other. She says, "Yes." And explained that most of them work together at a sandwich shop in a nearby suburb. Then she says they should rename the place from ice cream and sandwiches to ice cream and orgies because apparently everyone hooks up in the back. At that point, my stomach dropped and I desperately wanted to go home. Instead, she insists we go to McDonald's. Again, she chooses my meal. Again, she pays.

[00:12:53]By now, I'm just complying because I've developed this irrational fear that saying no might somehow trigger a boss battle. We eat our Big Macs. I don't remember the conversation. I only remember my internal monologue screaming. This was around the time antioxidants became trendy and palm juice was everywhere. So, before we left, she insisted on buying me a bottle of pomegranate juice.

[00:13:16]I thank her and say, "Oh, I think I hear my mom calling me home."

[00:13:21]Her response, "Sweet, your place. Let's go."

[00:13:25]>> [laughter] >> I took off running. It was about 2 miles home. I'm pretty sure I made it in under 10 minutes. She messaged me afterwards, but I never responded. I never heard from her again.

[00:13:38]>> Wow.

[00:13:40]>> That is so crazy.

[00:13:42]>> pimp.

[00:13:43]>> [laughter] >> Okay, she's a pimp.

[00:13:46]>> 13.

[00:13:47]>> Well, she's trying to grow her circle.

[00:13:49]She's a pimp. I don't care what anyone anyone says.

[00:13:52]>> And you are onto something.

[00:13:54]>> That's crazy. But you know, I'm also thinking about this ice cream shop. It's very unclean.

[00:14:01]>> unhygienic >> nasty word there >> My dilemma comes from dating.

[00:14:07]I was on Hinge for 8 months, three dates a week. Here are my weirdest and worst experiences. Already posted on the advice subreddit, but honestly, I want to share this everywhere because the experience was educational. I'm 20, female, and I've officially deleted Hinge after being on it for about 8 months. During that time, I went on an average of three dates a week. My goal was basically to get a proper feel for Hinge and compare it to apps my friends were using like Bumble and Tinder. If I was going to do dating apps, I wanted to commit. Looks became mostly irrelevant.

[00:14:43]I replied to pretty much everyone in my likes and agreed to dates with anyone who seemed decent. My vetting process was imperfect, which resulted in some absolutely insane experiences.

[00:14:56]>> Oh, my.

[00:14:57]>> Here are my highlights.

[00:14:59]Number one.

[00:15:00]My first ever Hinge date. This man pissed on the side of the road in the middle of King's Cross. Midstream, he turned around and asked, "Is this a turn off for you?"

[00:15:09]>> Yes.

[00:15:10]>> Oh, wow.

[00:15:12]>> I'll give him a two out of 10. Public indecency, and we had literally just walked past the pub. Somehow, he ghosted me afterwards, which did a number on my pride because how do you piss in front of me and then decide I'm the problem?

[00:15:27]Two, the surprise intervention.

[00:15:30]I had a genuinely lovely date with a guy. Went home all giddy thinking we really hit it off.

[00:15:36]Later that night, I got added to an Instagram group chat with him and a bunch of strangers. Nobody was a mutual except him.

[00:15:44]Somebody immediately @ed me in capital letters, "Do you know X? Stay away. He's a perv."

[00:15:51]Then I got flooded with videos of this man doing things in front of a laptop.

[00:15:56]Turns out he fell for a Discord scam and someone screen recorded everything. I'd rate him a four out of 10. Fun date, but being reckless enough to trust a random Discord is concerning. Bless your poor horny soul.

[00:16:11]>> Oh.

[00:16:11]>> Three, the boyfriend incident. While waiting for my date, a random middle-aged man started harassing me and wouldn't leave.

[00:16:19]I messaged my date asking him to hurry because I felt uncomfortable. He arrived 10 minutes later and when I introduced him as my boyfriend to get the guy to back off, he loudly went, "What? Don't make it weird. We just met."

[00:16:32]>> Oh, wow.

[00:16:34]>> I said, "Shut up."

[00:16:36]>> [snorts] >> I'd give him a three out of 10.

[00:16:39]Your complete inability to read the room meant we had a middle-aged man third wheeling for 45 minutes. The guy even offered me biscuits and my date got annoyed he didn't get one.

[00:16:49]>> Maybe >> [laughter] [gasps] >> Maybe you should have gone on a date with him.

[00:16:55]>> Yeah.

[00:16:56]>> Okay, four, the movie choice. He picked The Terrifier. During the scene where the blonde woman gets hung upside down and sawed in half, he turned to me completely serious and said, "That's hot." Five out of 10. Things had actually been going well until then.

[00:17:12]Deeply concerning eye contact. You may eventually feature in someone's Netflix documentary. Points awarded for fries and ice cream.

[00:17:20]Five, the mattress man.

[00:17:23]We were out super late, around 3:00 a.m.

[00:17:25]and somehow he convinced me to crash at his place before heading home. Tell me why this man owned no pillow, no duvet, no cover sheets.

[00:17:34]>> Oh, so >> Just raw.

[00:17:37]>> [laughter] >> I mean, they get blankets in prison.

[00:17:40]>> Oh, jeez.

[00:17:41]>> Give him that.

[00:17:42]>> Oh.

[00:17:42]>> Just raw mattress.

[00:17:44]I took my contacts out and didn't have my glasses. Despite knowing I'm basically blind, he still kicked me out at 7:00 a.m. because he was too tired to help me get home. One out of 10. I fell into the canal because I couldn't see.

[00:17:56]You used my folded jacket AS YOUR PILLOW.

[00:17:59]>> [laughter] >> NO.

[00:18:02]>> MEANWHILE, AT MY FLAT, I HAVE three pillows, all covered, and a duvet.

[00:18:07]>> Oh, my god.

[00:18:08]>> I would wish both sides of your pillow to always be warm, but first you actually need to buy one.

[00:18:13]>> [laughter] >> Six, the accidental girls' night.

[00:18:17]While talking outside my flat, my flatmates, extremely drunk, somehow dragged him into doing karaoke at the gay bar down the street. He ended up singing Defying Gravity. Actually a decent singer. I'll give him 10 out of 10. The date was derailed immediately, but we accidentally had an elite girls' night with a bonus man. You ghosted me afterwards, and honestly, fair enough after my Elvis impersonation. I've got way more stories, but character limits exist. All that to say, these are just a handful of weird moments from a lot of dates. I also had some genuinely lovely experiences. Most people on Hinge are actually decent. To the girls out there dating, good luck, stay safe, and have fun.

[00:19:00]>> That was That was really entertaining.

[00:19:02]>> Yeah, I enjoyed her her recaps.

[00:19:05]>> Yeah.

[00:19:06]>> Lovely.

[00:19:06]>> Top comment. I cannot believe he let you fall in a canal. Literally mind-boggling. OP responded, "There's a moment in life when you're pulling yourself out of a canal >> [laughter] >> at 7:00 in the morning, you've missed your only bus cuz you couldn't see the number at the front quick enough, [laughter] your back aches from no pillow, and your head hurts from no sleep, where you're like, 'Is this rock bottom?'

[00:19:35]I blocked that guy the second I got home, but boy oh boy was I raging for days."

[00:19:41]>> Yeah, you would be.

[00:19:42]>> But I would suggest sleeping in your contacts. I've done it many times.

[00:19:46]>> Yeah.

[00:19:47]>> I would never take them off. If I don't have my glasses >> home?

[00:19:50]>> If No, if I don't have my glasses, I'm definitely sleeping with them on.

[00:19:54]>> Yeah, but you're also at a stranger's house.

[00:19:57]>> Exactly. I need to Yeah, I need to see what's around.

[00:20:00]>> If you If you like built up a bit of trust and they've got saline at home, then you're okay.

[00:20:05]>> No. He didn't have He didn't have a pillow, bro.

[00:20:08]>> Yeah, I know. That's right.

[00:20:09]>> It's not the top of [laughter] the list of things to do.

[00:20:11]>> wild. It was It was a wild move, yeah.

[00:20:13]>> Some people are really living rough.

[00:20:15]>> [laughter] >> They are, man.

[00:20:17]>> Anyway, the feed said, "Fred's bad dates." You mean bad's dates?

[00:20:22]>> Wow.

[00:20:22]>> [laughter] >> You've got the S with every word that came off >> Fred's bad's dates. Okay. So, the feed said is where we see >> What do we What do we read? The wildest things we've seen this week.

[00:20:34]>> this week.

[00:20:35]>> Thank you. Okay, so number one, went on a date and he told me, "You're pretty for a dark girl."

[00:20:41]"I smiled and said, 'And you're confident for a man with that hairline.'

[00:20:46]The silence was loud. He started stuttering.

[00:20:49]I said, 'See how crazy backhanded compliments sound?' Then I left him there to reflect on his generational trauma."

[00:20:56]>> [laughter] >> "Number two, went to coffee with a guy once matched on a dating app. For the first 5 minutes, he says, 'I can't tell the size of your chest by how loose your top is, so I don't know if we're going to be compatible." I was so shocked and uncomfortable. I just got up and left without saying a word and never looked back. Like, what?

[00:21:15]>> Woah.

[00:21:16]>> Number three. I went on a coffee date where the guy was so cheap he didn't order coffee before I got there. He ordered free hot water and used his own tea bags. And the guy had the audacity to complain that I spent $2 on that bus instead of walking.

[00:21:31]>> That's That's >> Why is he pocket watching?

[00:21:35]>> Hey my sister.

[00:21:36]>> Four. I once met a guy online and made it very clear that I wasn't looking for romance or anything sexual. I was an exchange student and didn't need anything complicated. I was looking for people to hang out with. I went to the movies with this guy and after the movie he proposed to me with a flower.

[00:21:53]>> [laughter] >> Mad.

[00:21:56]>> Wait, sorry guys. Are you seeing the TikTok that's going around with this girl who is her best friend who's opposite? He's filmed the whole thing.

[00:22:04]Her sneaky link gets down on one knee and asks for her hand.

[00:22:09]She was >> [laughter] >> so disturbed.

[00:22:11]>> That's not No.

[00:22:12]>> No, it was crazy.

[00:22:13]>> eating the room.

[00:22:14]>> She didn't know what to do for so cuz they took her plate. And then another plate appears that says, "Will you marry me?"

[00:22:19]>> [laughter] >> written in chocolate sauce. She said, >> Woah. That's crazy.

[00:22:24]>> No, I haven't seen that.

[00:22:24]>> And he got down on one knee, popping ring.

[00:22:27]>> He loves her.

[00:22:28]>> The light behind the ring.

[00:22:29]>> Ah.

[00:22:30]>> [screaming] >> And that's where it That's where IT ENDED.

[00:22:33]>> WOW.

[00:22:36]>> NUMBER FIVE. I went on a coffee date with a lass. I'm gay. The convo started okay till she asked my plans for the next week. I told her I was going on holiday. She then spent the next 20 minutes saying how excited she was to be going on holiday with me. I SOS my daughter and within 10 seconds she rings with an emergency. Never got in my car so fast. She said, "Oh my god, we're going on holiday."

[00:23:00]>> That's That's >> Okay. So, the next one is today I effed up. Today I effed up absolutely wrecking a first date. This happened last night.

[00:23:12]It's the morning after and I'm still trying to wrap my head around how the heck such a good date could end so badly in the strangest twist of events. So I'm a 39-year-old man. I'm about 6 months out of my relationship. Breakup sucked, took a lot of time to process, but I'm finally starting to feel better and comfortable dating.

[00:23:30]I've been on a number of first dates over the summer and the fall just to keep myself out there. I work from home in a suburb and my opportunities to meet women organically are pretty rare. So naturally, I'm using the dating apps. I found that getting back to dating after about 2 years of being out of it, things are different and even worse.

[00:23:50]I really hadn't hit it off with anyone I'd gone out with this summer. Even when I thought I'd found a fun connection recently on another date, it went nowhere. Cue last night's date. She came out to meet me in my town. Kind of a long Uber ride for her. We went out to dinner where I'd reserved a table, but we got there early and sat at the bar.

[00:24:10]She's gorgeous, funny, talkative and we really hit it off. We're having such a great time there that we ended up staying at the bar and sitting next to each other. Sitting side by side, having a great conversation and lots of touching. Ended up there a few hours, one thing led to another and we were kissing at the bar.

[00:24:28]We decided to grab the check and head back to my place to kick it and smoke a little weed. For background, I've been smoking quite a bit this year starting in summer, but I'm still pretty sensitive to THC. It can really quiet me down and if I get really high, I definitely get some temporary anxiety while high and it goes away. It's something that kind of happens on the way up. So we're hanging in the living room on my couch. I pack a big bowl for us, pass it to her so she can smoke it first. She hits it hard and hands it back to me and I inattentively take a pretty massive hit without thinking about it. I'm instantly way higher than I'd planned or was really able to deal with in a situation with someone new where there was already a lot of sexual tension in the room.

[00:25:13]So, we're chatting and she says something about how she was in a 12-year relationship, she took some time to herself, and she's just getting back into dating and just wanting me to know.

[00:25:22]Instead of having any remark like about how that's a long time or asking her how long she's been single or if she was married, anything at all, instead I was confused about how we got onto the topic. So, my response was basically, "Yeah." And she replied, "Yeah." And then things just got awkward as fuck.

[00:25:42]I was so high that I was basically nonverbal and she just opened up about something pretty personal. Complete disconnect. I think we ended up laughing about it after I said sorry and was super duper baked. We moved on, but it was definitely a little weird. We hang out for a few minutes and then she says she had a great time and she's sorry, but she needs to get back home because she has a family brunch in the morning.

[00:26:05]Totally chill and makes sense. She lives like an hour away. It's past midnight and she needs to be up early to spend time with her family. I was still just high as fuck and acting a little awkward. I was frustrated at myself for it. So, she's grabbing her coat and putting her shoes on as her Uber's getting closer. Important to note that she was wearing heels that were super high. I'm hanging out on the couch talking with her and she's standing a few feet away. Next thing I know, she loses her footing and falls straight towards me. I'm sitting on the couch with my knee up. She falls face first and whacks her cheekbone right on my kneecap. Instantly, she grabs her cheek and I'm like, "Dude, are you okay?" I grab her an ice pack and apologize profusely. Her face is basically red and starting to swell and her Uber's coming.

[00:26:53]We tried to laugh it off, but holy shit, that was shocking. The mood was completely wrecked, and all the tension between us transformed into this weird energy. Keeping in mind, I'm still high as a kite.

[00:27:07]I walk her outside to her Uber, where it's raining. I hadn't put my shoes on or anything, just wearing socks and walking her out in the rain. She laughed super hard as she's getting into the Uber. I mean, what else can we do at this point? I texted her and said I was sorry about her cheek, let her know to text when she made it home safe, and told her that I still had a great time with her, because in fact I did, but I just got way higher than expected, and the date took the wildest turn in the world. I've never had anything like that happen to me. I wasn't expecting to ever hear from her again. She did text when she got home. She said her face looked fine, not to worry about it, and that she had a lot of fun.

[00:27:45]She was probably just being nice. I still doubt I'll see her again after that disaster. I'm hoping I do though, and we end up having the funniest first date story in the world, but the chances of that are slim to none. Why get high though?

[00:27:57]>> It's salvageable. Sorry, for me it's very salvageable. Message, call her the next day, and just say, like, yeah, it went too hard, but let's meet up for drinks next week, 2 weeks time, whenever.

[00:28:11]>> Yeah, following that the top comment says, "Write her back and say, I need to see you again." It's with a K for knee.

[00:28:18]Knee cap.

[00:28:19]>> Aw, what happened?

[00:28:21]>> [laughter] >> I just Yeah, it's so I don't know. I think it's quite interesting people's perception of the events. For me, that wasn't a bad That wasn't a really bad ending.

[00:28:33]>> But he said he messed up, but I don't think he did anything. She was just wearing She was just wearing She had heels and she >> No, no, no, no. He's talking about when he when she told her No, when she told him about her relationship status.

[00:28:45]>> And he said, "Yeah?"

[00:28:46]>> [laughter] >> And then there was no one around him.

[00:28:47]Yeah.

[00:28:49]That That's what he was talking about.

[00:28:50]He felt like he fucked up there.

[00:28:51]>> Oh, that's fair.

[00:28:52]>> And I No, but I just don't think it's a big deal. I think it's really salvageable. People have done more They've done worse. Sorry. They've done a hell of a lot worse. Like, that's not a bad date at all.

[00:29:04]Yeah. It's just maybe a bit awkward. It is, but it just it just ended a bit awkwardly. She's got a little bruise.

[00:29:10]Her face is fine.

[00:29:11]>> Ask me in 2 to 3 days.

[00:29:13]>> I think some people make a big deal out of nothing because >> Yeah.

[00:29:16]>> And I think that a lot of things are viewed really seriously when it's just like turned into a joke, like >> Yeah, it seems like they have, though, yeah.

[00:29:23]>> So, this dilemma is from Reddit Dating.

[00:29:26]Yesterday, I went on the best date of my life.

[00:29:30]I, 26 female, have been seeing a guy from university, 27 male. Our first date was at a bookstore coffee shop where we talked endlessly until we were asked to leave because the shop was closing.

[00:29:42]>> Aw.

[00:29:43]>> We discovered so many shared interests that our conversations just flowed so naturally without either of us having to try to keep up. On Friday, we planned to have dinner at a cute Italian place. We arrived around 5:00 p.m. to beat the crowds and had plenty of daylight left after dinner. Spontaneously, we decided to hike to my favorite beach. Mind you, we were still dressed for dinner. It was a fun and slightly risky trek through the woods, but it was absolutely worth it. We sat on a tree branch and talked until sunset. But what we didn't know was that a storm was approaching. By the time we realized it was too late and we had to walk back through the woods in pouring rain.

[00:30:22]Despite the rain, it turned out to be the most magical date I've ever had.

[00:30:26]With the tree canopy kind of shielding us from the worst of the rain and fireflies.

[00:30:31]He was a complete gentleman throughout, holding my hand to keep me steady, opening doors, and looking at me like I was the most special person in the world.

[00:30:40]We ended the night watching our favorite comedy sketches in his car until the rain cleared. It wasn't the most physically intimate date, just hugs and hand-holding, but it was incredibly intimate in every other way. Yesterday, we had a picnic at the beach, another amazing date. He's sweet, caring, and incredibly respectful towards me. We ended the day with some great hugs and a small kiss. Anyway, I've been so happy with both dates that I wanted to share.

[00:31:08]>> Aw.

[00:31:10]>> Happy for you.

[00:31:11]>> Small kiss.

[00:31:12]>> I know. That >> [laughter] >> Small Me would have been a full-on snug.

[00:31:17]>> Yeah, why not? Small kiss. Top comment.

[00:31:20]That's really great. Sending more good vibes.

[00:31:23]>> Yeah, hope it lasts.

[00:31:24]>> The final dilemma comes from Okay, Keep It. Back in 2012, I had just moved down to Tucson after getting divorced and figured it was time to get back into dating. Historically, I'd had pretty good luck with online dating. Most of my relationships started online, so I felt optimistic. I started chatting with one woman and had this nagging feeling her profile photos might have been generous. We got along well and I was trying to turn over a new leaf and not be superficial, so I set up a date. It was the middle of summer and I'd recently finished modifying my car.

[00:32:00]If you've ever had a 400 wheel horsepower car, you know restraint becomes optional. On the drive over, I noticed a strong smell of gas. I ignored it, mistake number one, because I had test pipes installed and they always smelled a little fuel heavy. I missed the turn to her apartment because I was too busy enjoying the drive. Pulled into her lot, checked behind me to reverse, looked forward, and immediately saw flames. Not little flames, 3 ft of fire stretched across the entire hood of my car and getting bigger by the second.

[00:32:36]I've dealt with enough chaos free work to stay calm under pressure, so I grabbed what I could, got clear, called 911, and watched my $40,000 limited edition car, 340 made and mine was number two, burn to the ground in under 5 minutes. Right about then, my phone rings. It's my date.

[00:32:57]I explain what happened and she starts getting annoyed thinking I'm blowing her off. I tell her, "Walk outside, look for the giant column of smoke." She reluctantly does, then immediately starts apologizing and says she's coming over.

[00:33:12]We stayed on the phone while I waited for the fire department. Eventually, I see her coming around the corner and I wish I could say my stomach dropped because she was stunning.

[00:33:22]>> [laughter] >> Unfortunately, my suspicions about the profile pictures were correct.

[00:33:28]>> Oh my, oh my.

[00:33:29]>> I wasn't attracted to her at all.

[00:33:31]>> Oh no.

[00:33:32]>> But she'd shown up while my life was actively combusting and I no longer had transportation, so I figured, "Be nice."

[00:33:40]To my surprise, we actually had a great conversation. She invited me back to her apartment for a few drinks. Her definition of a few drinks was a 4 750 mil bottle.

[00:33:52]>> Hey.

[00:33:53]>> I stayed over since neither of us could drive. The next morning, she wakes up and immediately drinks two beers.

[00:34:00]She offers to take me home and asks to keep hanging out. At this point, I've avoided the awkward rejection conversation because she did rescue me from my burning car situation, so I say, "Sure." She disappears for 30 minutes and comes back carrying what had to be $100 worth of alcohol.

[00:34:20]This is [laughter] going on. Throughout the day, we're watching TV and messing around online while she systematically deletes the entire supply.

[00:34:28]By 8:00 p.m., she's cycling through crying, laughing, yelling, and being weirdly cheerful, sometimes all in one sentence.

[00:34:37]I finally hit my limit and tell her she needs to go lie down, and when she sobers up, it's time to head home. After about 10 minutes of arguing, she crashes in my bed.

[00:34:47]The evening instantly improves.

[00:34:50]>> [laughter] >> Eventually Oh, she's out cold.

[00:34:54]>> [laughter] >> Eventually, I go to sleep, too. Next morning, I woke up completely soaked. My half-asleep brain takes a minute to process what happened.

[00:35:05]She had peed in my bed.

[00:35:07]It's worth noting I had bought brand new furniture literally a week earlier.

[00:35:12]I just laid there for a minute questioning every decision that had led me here.

[00:35:17]Then she starts waking up. I pretend to still be asleep. Instead of owning up to it, she quietly slides out of bed, carefully strips the sheets, walks to my laundry room, and puts everything directly into the dryer. Not the washer, the dryer. That was my breaking point. I got up, walked past her without saying anything, chain-smoked an unreasonable number of cigarettes, came back inside, and [snorts] found her casually sitting at my computer like absolutely nothing had happened. I [snorts] looked at her, shook my head, and told her to leave.

[00:35:53]Later that day, she texted, "Sorry about all the drinking. It was the 10-year anniversary of my brother passing away, and that's how my family celebrates his life. I had a wonderful time with you, though. Want to meet up again?" She's an animal. [laughter] >> Want to meet up again?

[00:36:11]Hey.

[00:36:12]>> Absolutely not. That was a bad first impression.

[00:36:15]>> You pissed on a bed, and you didn't even say, "I'm sorry about that."

[00:36:18]>> Yeah, no.

[00:36:19]>> It's "Sorry about all the drinking."

[00:36:20]>> No.

[00:36:21]>> You need to get the hell out of dodge and go to the first rehab center on the way home.

[00:36:27]>> Yeah.

[00:36:28]>> You're a drunk, my dear.

[00:36:30]>> She is. But she said that's how my family celebrate.

[00:36:34]>> No. Where are your family?

[00:36:36]>> She was just by her smoke.

[00:36:38]>> You're you're an alcoholic, sis.

[00:36:39]>> She's crazy. Top comment. Your extreme misfortune has entertained me for a brief moment in time.

[00:36:46]>> [laughter] >> Congratulations.

[00:36:48]Another comment. The inferno was God trying to save you from a crueler fate.

[00:36:53]>> [laughter] >> Yeah.

[00:36:56]>> Not lying.

[00:36:57]>> I'd be so pissed if someone pissed on my mattress.

[00:37:00]>> Brand new.

[00:37:01]>> That Do you know what? That happened to me.

[00:37:03]That happened to me. I think I'd had the mattress maybe a couple weeks, and my friend's daughter pissed on the bed.

[00:37:10]And anyway >> The end of that sentence?

[00:37:17]>> It's It's a devastating feeling.

[00:37:19]>> Yeah, it's actually really devastating.

[00:37:21]And you can't be You can't be angry at a child, as well.

[00:37:24]>> a protector underneath.

[00:37:25]>> I didn't at the time, but you can You can get it professionally cleaned, though.

[00:37:30]I I know that now. Back then, I didn't have that kind of money.

[00:37:34]>> Yeah.

[00:37:34]>> Like, I literally just came from >> My mattress comes with a a >> That's really good for that.

[00:37:41]>> Yeah, but like a wet protector, as well.

[00:37:43]>> [laughter] >> That's really good to know. I was just left uni, just got a job, just bought a mattress.

[00:37:49]>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I get it.

[00:37:50]>> I didn't have spare professional cleaning money.

[00:37:52]>> Listen, I remember when >> I tried to clean it, but I didn't do that great of a job, but >> I remember one time he peed on the bed.

[00:37:59]The way he peed was so awkward. It's like Normally, you pee kind of like down this way. When we woke up, it was like near our pillow. I was like, "How are you sleeping?"

[00:38:09]We sleep in the air.

[00:38:10]They just move around. Where he peed, I was like "Why?"

[00:38:15]>> [laughter] >> It's like how I was so glad that we had the mat the protector, cuz it was just stripping that off, and the mattress fine, but just this much more we he would have pissed on the mattress cuz you know the protector only covers a certain point.

[00:38:28]So I was like, "Where the hell How do you pee that way?" Like >> He might have been sleeping with his head to the >> Like his head was up up that way. He's probably Yeah, he's heading towards the foot of the bed. He was sleeping like he was doing a hip hop.

[00:38:40]>> Oh.

[00:38:41]>> Like it was crazy, anyway.

[00:38:44]You never want to wake up with that. I was so unhappy when I woke up. So I can only imagine a grown person's wee as well.

[00:38:50]>> And then they pretend like it didn't occur.

[00:38:52]>> And then he went to mess up my dryer.

[00:38:54]>> No, that's crazy.

[00:38:56]>> And that's it for our little dating episode. I hope you enjoyed it, and we will see you next week for our normal episode. Thanks for watching.

[00:39:04]>> Bye.

[00:39:05]>> Bye.

[00:39:05]>> [screaming] >> When is the door not a door?

[00:39:13]When it's a jar.

[00:39:15]>> [laughter] >> I went on a coffee date with my with a la >> See, she's just whistled.

[00:39:25]No, I just stopped.

[00:39:27]>> What?

[00:39:27]>> No, last the last film we did, yeah, I was whistling as well.

[00:39:31]>> [laughter]