House of the Dragon Season 3 Episode 5 Breakdown | Everybody in Westeros Needs Therapy

[00:00:00]It ain't no therapist in Westeros. You mean to tell me we going through all this foolishness because people got mommy and daddy issues? My name is Shirana Williams and these are my thoughts on House of the Dragon episode 5. Y'all to think that Rene thought that people was going to work for free. You mean to tell me people hunting us down and we not even getting paid? You think we going to be fighting for the crown in this economy with no money? You already ain't got no food. Y'all barely can eat in the palace. People over here starving and you think we fa to keep fighting for you and people literally slitting our throats and cutting our bowels out.

[00:00:35]Girl, be ever so effing for real. And Damon too talking about my man going to fight for me BECAUSE IT'S ME. DON'T NOBODY care about you, ho. You think I care about you and I can't put food on the table? Okay, stop it. So, I want to start with Sir Krispy, aka Sir Christian Cole. Over here, we call him Sir Krispy, but in case y'all knew over here, so you know who I'm talking about. So curious speed has come up with this plan which was actually working of ambushing um Reneer's men who are marching in the Riverlands. They basically been ambushing their camps trying to slow them down even though they're kind of outnumbered right now. They have no idea where Aean is, where Raggedy Vaggar is.

[00:01:13]We see the footprints of where Vagar has been, but no one really has cited Vagar.

[00:01:18]They just see kind of the footprints that Vaggar has had a presence there.

[00:01:23]Even Aean don't even know where the heck Vagar is. All right. So, this plan has been working until, you know, we see that Sir Krispy's little little horse had to go on to glory because there were crow's feet put out to basically, you know, slow them down, injure the horses, injure some of the men. And so, Sir is like, "Hey, Sir Krispy, I get it. Okay, you're trying to be like a man of honor.

[00:01:46]Just come on back to Oldtown. You going to make some good money there. People going to love on you. You probably going to have all the hoes over there. So, let's just go to Oldtown. Let's let's leave all this behind. Let Rene take the throne. We don't need to lose no more men. We'll know where the heck Aman is.

[00:02:01]Let's just go ahead and just take an early retirement in Westeros and let's just go live out our lives in peace. But of course, Sir Krispy is so hard-headed.

[00:02:09]He going to do what he want to do. So he leading them down. All the men is just tired. Sir Wayne's like, "Hey, these fools fa to desert you." And low key, I'm f to desert you, too, because I feel like we're on a fool's errand. And then Sir Krispy goes into this whole thing like, "Hey, I'm tired of serving people, okay? I'm tired of serving the blacks.

[00:02:26]I'm tired of serving the greens. I just want to live my life and do what I want to do. So if I'm going to go to glory and you're not going to go to glory, Sir Krispy, you're going to hell. All right?

[00:02:36]If I'm going to do that, I'm going to do it on my own terms. I'm going to do it my way." And Sir Grant looked at him like, "Bro, what? Are you serious?" So Sir Krispie trying to do this little speech at the end, trying to get the men motivated. I mean, we see people passing out when they walk in. They telling them, "Hey, just leave them." Cuz honestly, they they doing better anyway.

[00:02:56]I wish I could have passed out and went on to glory, too, instead of following this raggedy person behind. They finally give up after they see that the rivermen are ahead of them. They burned the bridge so they couldn't cross over. And so, he's trying to get his like people riled up and like all happy. They not really having it. And then we s see Sir Wayne said, "Honey, it's above me now."

[00:03:16]And he packed his stuff up. He told his man, he said, "Hey, hey, you guys want to live? Come on over here. Come, come with me." That's not what he said, but that's basically what it was given. All right. So, we know if you know the books, you already know what Sir Krispy's Fate is. And I feel like we're edging like closer to uh that portion of I don't want to spoil it for people who, you know, haven't read the book or people who haven't just went to Google and just said what is their crispy fate.

[00:03:41]But that's pretty much everything that's happening with them. But let me talk about Laura Orman, okay? cuz I already know he crazy. But my man that came up with his own currency. He's declared House of Derion aka Darren who is Allison's Allison and Viseris's youngest son. He basically said, "Hey, House of Derion is the king. We got our own money. So y'all sit over there being poor. Ain't got no coins. Sitting up here dying for your queen of the bastards over there in King's Landing.

[00:04:09]But over here, we got Hassadion money."

[00:04:12]Now, I don't know about y'all, but can you just make your own currency and be like, "Hey, we got money now." I don't think that's how that works. But hey, he has his gold coin. He shows House of Darion who really like, "Hey, man. I'm just here so I don't get fine. Y'all done put me in the water to this crazy man. Like, he be lashing out doing crazy stuff. So, I ain't got no choice but to be doing all these studies that he really don't care about. So, I just Orman fine. But hey, he actually is like making some headway. We see that he's has people who are planted in uh King's Landing who have been secretly, you know, unaliving some of the gold cloaks, slitting their throats, having like their bowels out. Four of Damon's men have already, you know, been killed. And then we see what happens at the end of this week's episode. And so Orman, Lord Orman, he not letting up. Okay? He said, "Hey, I said what I said. I declared my king. I don't care about y'all little raggedy queen. We going to do what needs to be done. All right. But Damon, he's trying to raise the spirits of the Gold Cloaks, which is kind of crazy cuz he was like, "I know my man." And even even I think it's Sir Luther, and I could be wrong. Don't don't hold me to it, okay?

[00:05:22]I had an espresso martini today, but he's basically like, "Damon, child, let me tell you, I know you've been around for a while, but half the people who you said fought for you, honey, they not around no more. These them Gen Z like these the Gen Z gold clucks, okay? They not doing nothing unless you sawing some money. So right now it ain't no money in their bank account, okay? It ain't no money in their dragon accounts. All right. So they're just like, "Huh? You mean to tell me people hunting me down and I ain't getting paid?" And word on the street, y'all ain't got no money.

[00:05:54]Any way to pay people? Absolutely not.

[00:05:56]And I was here for it. Damon tried to like, you know, get them so happy, but they were just like, "Sir, it ain't no money." Okay, it's pay to play. You want You want us to fight? Show me some coin.

[00:06:10]All right. So, they get a break in their little case of what Damon's trying to figure out. And they see they find this man that they're torturing. And then he shows them the gold coin, the House of Derion coin. And basically, they know that Laura Orman is behind this. And then, you know, he shows Rene like, "Hey, remember when I told you you was supposed to burn that little raggedy kid, but you wanted to have a heart all of a sudden? You see how that went against you, Rea? You see how y'all be treating me like I'm the crazy relative.

[00:06:36]And really, I'm just the one who doing what needs to be done. But since y'all don't want to let me be me, and you want to do your own thing, I want to be different. I'm not my father. I want to be different than everybody else." You see how you in this situation? You see how you in a crazy predicament right now, Rea? So all he had to do was show the coin and be like, "Next time you going to listen to me, okay?" But Reneer has her own thing going on. And before I even get into that, I want to talk about Sir Krispy, not Sir Krispy, I want to talk about Sir uh Lord Foot Fetish and Aegon. So I know that Lord Laris aka Lord Foot Fetish, all right, I just know he be going through it because he be so tired of Aegon. And to be honest, it ain't enough feet picks, feet sniffs, just feet tickles in the world to make me put up with Agon Raggedy behind cuz he's sitting up here like I'm going to go to her hall and murder my raggedy brother, Aean. And and Laura Lis is just like, bro, bro, you can barely walk. You can't do nothing.

[00:07:40]You think you fa You think you going to WALK YOUR RAGGEDY BEHIND? YOU ALREADY SEE. YOU already see. I'm I'm challenged in walking a little bit. And ain't nothing wrong with that sir foot lord foot fetish. But sir, all these people we got to go through all the lints that we had to go through to get to Harrenhal. Honey, are you okay? Do you not see your fate if you follow down this path? Like, I'm telling you, all you got to do is just come back to this raggedy camp and just chill and let them battle it out. But he just don't ever want to listen. Okay. And so I like that we finally get to the acceptance stage for Aegon where he's basically just like okay I guess some fire is dead and you know I know my raggedy behind not going to reach Harrenhal and then Lord Laris is just like okay so can we go back now like did you get it out of your system?

[00:08:27]Can you just listen to me from now on?

[00:08:29]And so I do like that Lord Foot Fetish read Aegon for filth because you have all of these Rene Aean uh Aegon. They're all like complaining these like first world problems. You guys literally grew up as young princes and princesses with every single opportunity before you.

[00:08:51]Really? Real is the only one who got dead dirty because she was basically born a woman. But honestly, y'all live good lives. All right? And y'all just here complaining. All y'all do is complain. Don't never want to do nothing but just sit here and complain. My daddy didn't listen to me. My mommy didn't love me enough. And so I like that Lord Foot Fetish reads Aegon for filth cuz Aegon's like, "Well, my mother like care more about, you know, Aean because he was missing his raggedy eye and this and that." He was just like, "Sir, let me just be honest for a moment cuz I've been listening to you complain for a very long time now. Let me tell you something. You ain't ish. You ain't going to never be ish. All right. You had every single opportunity before you to be a great king. And you didn't want to do it. You wanted to go around here and just smash some little pass arounds.

[00:09:38]You didn't want to take your training serious. You didn't take being a king serious. All you did you wanted to drink. You wanted to just lay in your little self-pity and say people didn't love you enough. And this is why you're in the predicament that you're in. He was like, "Not only are you a terrible man, but you were a terrible king at that." So miss me with the complaining, sweetheart. And I was just like, "Thank you. Finally. Finally, someone told him like what needed to be said. You are the reason that you were like you were in pain that you just half burnt because you wanted to march into a battle that you knew that you were not good in battle. You weren't EVEN INVITED TO THE BATTLE. How you going to show up to a battle that you weren't invited to knowing that you can't fight? That is why you burnt. That's why some fire is hibernating or probably dead. I need you to understand that you are the reason why you're at where you're at right now.

[00:10:30]Okay? So, even he had to be quiet for a moment. So, they go back to the camp.

[00:10:35]Then, they run into Raggedy Tylen Lannister cuz he was like, "Just get the ship." He's like, "SHIP, WHAT Y'ALL trying to do?" So, while they sitting up here coming up with a master plan, talking too loud, one of the people, the main man that runs the camp, he sees them and then basically Aegon kills a man. And then if you could see the look in s in Lord Foot Fetish's face, he was just like, "Here this mother go. If it ain't one thing, it's another." I thought I got through to him and here he go still making dumb decisions. I can just tell he fed up. I'm surprised at this point that he ain't just sold him off somewhere and just had somebody just take him on to glory. Really take him to hell cuz ain't nobody in House of the Dragon going to glory except maybe Helena. That's about it. But yeah, so I don't know what's gonna happen with all of that, but I just know I know foot fetish sick of this. I know he's sick of Agon miss. I know he's sick of it. Okay, so I don't know what's going to happen at that, but I guess Agon felt like he got his lick back since the dude was being disrespectful in the first place.

[00:11:33]He was like, "And it's your grace." As he like stabbed him. So I was just like, "Okay, you got to win, I guess." All right. So let's talk about Alice and Aean. So Aean been missing. Alice sitting up here nursing him, playing his mama, trying to be his lover. I don't know what they got going on, but it's just a whole weird thing. So, Am's been having nightmares. You saw when uh Damon got to Harrenhal, you know, he has the nightmares. They talk about the ghost that haunt Harrenhal and things like that. And then, you know, he starts talking about how, you know, he saw himself die just like Helena told him.

[00:12:08]And then she starts like cuddling him like she his mama. And honestly, that was the first time that I saw Aman. I was like, "Oh, he actually is human. He not like the spawn of Satan like I think he is. He just he just a little boy that's frightened." And then he started talking all this mess. Alice tells him that Reneer is queen that they say that Aean killed Aegon. And then he started talking about how I worship my brother.

[00:12:29]And I was like, "You worship Aegon Raggedy behind?" But I guess that's just like, you know, the little brother just looking up to his big brother, but it really was nothing to look up to with Aegon. But just like Aegon thinks that they favor Aean because of his eye, you know, Aean talks about how his brother tormented him, made fun of him because of his eye, and how like he received better attention because he was the first born and this and that. Just like how Agon was like, "Well, Aiman was better in Valyrian. Aim was better a better fighter." Like they both going through this whole thing. It's interesting how all the siblings think that the other siblings were favored over the other. And it's just like honestly a part of training. This is why we need mental health training in Westeros because we wouldn't be through half of these battles for the Iron Throne if they just had better parents to love them and they just had a couple of therapy sessions. All right. So um basically you know she comforts him and then we see that um we see that more men come looking for Aean and then they try to like you know mess with SA Alice but then Aean comes to her rescue and he kills all of them. She's like oh I see someone took a turn for the better. You can tell that he's still weak but I guess he's finding his way back to his true devilish self. All right. So, all of that is happening, but Allison, who is never going to get the mother of the year award, but she tried to be a mother in this week's episode, she tried. All right. So, we know Helena is pregnant. And so, she asked the Grand Maesters to bring the little potion that Allison took when she was smashing Sir Krispy that uh Rene took when she was smir Krispy, you didn't show got around a lot now that I'm sitting up here thinking about it. Okay, I'm sorry. Let me get back. Let me stay focused. All right. So she has the grandmaster bring the potion but the grand m like hey girl okay I'm already just a grand maester and I served the high towers for a long time and you know I'm dark skin and stuff so I I just it already ain't looking good for me right now okay I can't keep helping you people talking they already tried to kill me like once or twice your raggy son tried to kill me I can't take no more I got to go ahead and side with Rene because she's queen now so if you ask me to do something else for you sis I got to go ahead and snitch on you okay so this the last favor that I can do for you. So, he gives her the little I don't want my baby no more potion and she tries to get Helena to take it and Helena's like, "Girl, I'm a mother. I know you're a raggedy mother and you didn't really care about us and stuff, but I care about mine. So, I'm not taking your raggedy potion. I'm going to have my baby." Allison's like, "Girl, but if you have a boy, she going to have to kill your baby. So, either either we going to take the baby to glory now, and if it's a boy, the baby going to get taken to glory by Rene. So, I don't know what you want to do, but it's only it's only the same outcome just at different time periods. All right. So, Helena still wasn't having it. But Miseria, she you know, she knows everything. She she came in the room like, "Now, be you think I don't know. You think I I don't still hear these whispers? Did you not know who I am? You didn't ask about me. You know about me. You know, you know good and well about me. So, what's going on, girl? Who Who the potion for?"

[00:15:40]She smelled a little potion. She tried to say, "Oh, Helena been having headaches." She's like, "Okay, give me the headache potion." She smelled it.

[00:15:46]She like, "Girl, now you know I ran a [ __ ] house. You think I don't know what this potion smell like? I can make this in my sleep." And so she basically takes the fall for Helena and makes it seem like, "Oh, I took a lover." And Miss Saria looking at her like, "Girl, I know you not getting your bag blown out cuz Sir Krispy somewhere else right now.

[00:16:04]Ain't nobody trying to smash you right now. The block is hot for you." So, she takes the potion, which is the first motherly thing that I've seen her do outside of she did try to she's been trying to save Helena, even though Helena just don't want to listen to her.

[00:16:16]So, she takes a potion, but Missia is still looking at her like, "I don't trust you." So, Allison comes up with this plan to basically have them sneak out and basically get away cuz it's only so long you're going to be able to hide that Helena is with child, right?

[00:16:31]Especially as they're being, you know, held prisoner, they're being watched. So she was like, "Hey girl, we got to leave tonight, honey." She was like, "Okay, but what about my baby? What about like the little one right here? You know, your grandchild." She was like, "Oh, we got to leave her behind." Okay, I'm not going to lie. She's cuz she was like, you know, if she lets out one squeal and then I just thought about Harriet Tubman and how she like knocked out when the babies would cry when they try to like go uh to march to freedom and she would knock them babies out if they was being too loud. I was just I know I shouldn't have thought of that. I let my intrusive thoughts win, BUT DON'T ACT LIKE Y'ALL didn't think of that, too. And she was just like, "Baby, she got to stay behind. You know, maybe we'll come back and get her. You know, maybe, you know, Reneer take care of her." And then she was like, "Girl, let me tell you something. As a real mother, cuz you're not a mother. I know when you're lying. You look away when you lie." And all you do is lie, Allison.

[00:17:23]So, she was just like, "Oh, no. I'm not leaving my kids." So, she finally ends up convincing her. Okay. So, they're dressed in disguise and they're like trying to get out, but as they're about to leave the room, Missa is right there like, "Oh, don't you know? I know all the secrets that's going on up here. So, I don't even understand why you thought you was going to get away with this raggedy plan." So, Allison tries to tell her like, "Hey, okay, girl. I'm caught.

[00:17:48]We red-handed caught, but just don't tell nobody. I'll stay here. Do what I need to do, but I just need you to keep this secret." So, I don't know if she was actually going to keep the secret.

[00:17:57]She kind of just walked out. But Helena finds a secret passageway, but then they realized that the passageway led to like a wall and then basically the the entrance that they came in that was already sealed. Then Helena down behind dropped the uh lantern. So I don't know what's going to happen to them. It's just it's touch and go right now for them. But Rene is just going through it.

[00:18:19]Her council raggedy. There's this new lady who I forgot she was complaining. I think she's in relation to the Starks, but I could be wrong. It could be the espresso martini getting to me. But she's on the council and she was already complaining like, "So you just not going to give us her haul like you said? You just going to reig on the plans?" So they go to the council meeting and Sir Torren Manderly, he is so shady. Like they're literally in the middle of a meeting and Sir Torren is like telling old girl all the like all the tea like, "Hey, like Adam, that dude right there, that's Lord Coralus' bastard." Then Mera started talking. They like, "Oh yeah, and that's the [ __ ] right there. the white mark. Yeah. Yeah, girl. The the brothel girl. Yeah. Damon looking like, "Y'all know we can hear you, right?" And then he was like, "My bad." I was just, you know, I just trying to fill her in on the tea. She She kind of behind. She probably wondering like who all these bastards and [ __ ] at this council table. Like, huh, thought we were a decent city here once before, but clearly Rene just doing whatever she want to do. So, I love the, you know, they're upset cuz they can't find Aean and she wants Baya and Adam to like continue looking for Vagar, but Adam's like, "Girl, honey, we need to sleep. We ain't had no food. Like, we got to lay down. Y'all ain't got no money. So, it ain't like we living like in abundance over here right now." Bailey, like, "Adam, speak for yourself. I want to be a hero cuz I ain't trying to get married to no raggedy man." But did y'all kind of peep that there's like it's like a little love connection happening between between Baya and Adam? Y'all see that, right? I didn't make that up. Y'all see that, right? Cuz I saw it. I saw it. I said, "Go ahead now. We got to stick together in times like this." So, um, Rene gets upset because Damon just do what they want to do. They said, "Hey, y'all get some rest. Damon, can you go do what I told these little raggedy kids to do?" but they too tired since they act like they didn't they've been working day and night and they ain't really doing nothing. So she gets upset because Damon's like, "Girl, my men getting murdered. We ain't even got no money to pay them. We need to worry about them cuz they supposed to be protecting us, but if they ain't getting paid, they ain't going to protect us. So like I think we got bigger issues at hand." So she goes and checks him outside like, "Hey, um I don't know if you know, um I'm the queen. Like we not in Dragon Stone no more. So if I tell you to do something, I need you to go do it. and I don't need no lip behind it.

[00:20:37]All right? So, let me know what you fa do because if you're not gonna respect me, then we're gonna have to figure out other arrangements. All right? So, Damon basically goes off cuz he like, "Girl, ain't nobody trying to listen to you right now." Okay? She's like, "I ain't got time to argue." And he was like, "And I ain't trying to argue with you."

[00:20:52]And he just walks off. But I like that when we see Rene go um to the temple to pray, which gave Damon a chuckle cuz he was like, "Girl, now you know you don't practice this religion. What you sitting up here for? you still you still mad that the little high he don't want to like anoint you queen what what are we doing you're just doing this for appearances girl you know you ain't praying stop playing so then he tells her like what's going on and I like that he reminds her because even Rene is just like these people call me bastards and he was just like girl you doing a lot like you doing all of that in last week's episode just because somebody called you a bastard and I want to be like in Rene you said you let Lord Corus name each and every one of your bastards and say to your face and you didn't do nothing. So now you mad at them. You taking it out on them when you really need to be going to get Lord Coralus. So he was just like, "Honey, did you think this was going to be easy? You thought being queen was going to be like this easy thing and like people would just rejoice like, "Oh, Reneer's queen now.

[00:21:54]We just going to chill out. We ain't going to like we ain't going to try her no more. We ain't going to call her queen of the bastards no more." He was just like, "Honey, that's life. That is being queen. That is having a position of power. People are always going to be there to try you every single step of the way. And it's more about how you respond to it with a cool. Now Damon talking to someone telling you need to be more levelheaded. I mean not the best messenger. Okay. But he was actually spinning facts to her. So he also tells her like there's something actually I want to give kudos to him because he told her like um and let me find this cuz she was talking about how she felt like the guys turned against her and he was just like you know you're a woman all right so he was just like dang why can't I find it whatever he's like you are a woman and there will always be those who oppose you and sometimes I think Rene forgets she wants to be on the same playing field as her father Viseras as Aegon. And it's just like you're a woman. Like it's it's never going to be the same for you. It's just never. It doesn't matter how many people you kill, how many lands you conquer, they're always going to try you based off the fact that you are a woman. All right? So, he was like, "You're better than this." And she was like, "Okay, well, if I'm better than this and you sitting there talking about that, I need to do better. You supposed to be Damon.

[00:23:13]You supposed to be the baddest in the land. And you can't even find my raggedy brothers." And then he just kind of looked at her like, "Girl, ain't nobody ain't nobody trying to argue with you."

[00:23:21]And so we do get word that Joffrey comes back and she, you know, I don't know why she has this apprehension to, you know, go and see Joffrey. She finally goes to see him, but he's already asleep. And I I don't know if she just worries because, you know, it's the block is still hot out there and she's already lost two of her sons and I think she's just scared of losing another son. And, you know, basically it's just a lot going on. she's not had an easy path to becoming queen and now that she is queen it's the road still isn't easy for her and so I like that you know we see in this episode that everyone still everyone kind of feels the same way and it's interesting that through their lens they feel wronged and they feel hurt when the other sibling thinks that they just had this happy go-lucky life and they didn't have all the issues that they had. So, I think it's really interesting that all of these siblings are being checked for their privilege, being checked for I just thought things were going to be so much easier this way and maybe because they were kids who grew up in a time of peace under Viseras and they didn't see the spoils of war, what it took to get to this era of peace. So, it's very interesting how, you know, they're having such a hard time because they felt like these roads would be easy for them to conquer and it really isn't. But, I do like this episode a lot more than last week's episode. And I know you're going to be like, "Shana, everything can't be like rah rah, kill everybody every single week." But I did like this episode a lot more. Um, I like that we're getting more into like the mental state of where everybody is right now as we see we're gearing up to a big battle. We know what's going to happen. But I actually I really enjoyed this episode. I really did. I liked it. Now, people were hyping this up a lot. People like, "Oh, did you watch the episode?" They said this is like one of the best episodes. And I was like, "This episode was really good."

[00:25:05]But like what y'all was hyping it up to me before I saw it, I was just like, "Okay, it's good." But I don't I don't know if I got a different episode to everybody else. But I was like, "It was cute. It was good." Sir Krispie still alive, so it ain't that good. A guy is still alive. Aim is still alive. So unless one of them going to hell. Don't be sitting up here gassing up these episodes like that. Okay, but yeah, those are my thoughts on House of the Dragon episode 5. As always, my name is Shir from Perweight. And if you like what you saw today, make sure you hit the like button, hit subscribe, share this video with your friends, and make sure you hit that notification bell and hype my video, too. And I love you guys 30,000. And until I see you again, bye.