Wasted Potential From a Place of Privilege

追加: 2026-05-05

[00:00:00]Mandatory rant. Are you winning, son?

[00:00:05]Nobody talks about the internal shame and discomfort of wasting the potential that comes from a place of privilege, having all the means and resources, yet failing to achieve something significant. It's when you realize that you have no external factors to blame, that you are born into a family where basic amenities are taken care of, where failures have safety nets, where you have the time the underprivileged dream of. Yet you are unable to utilize that undue advantage, that unfair head start to truly excel at something meaningful.

[00:00:38][ __ ] So, this has been a video that I I actually had a very difficult time making this. I I would actually probably admit that this is one of the hardest videos uh for me to make because I have been thinking about how to articulate this video uh for a long long long long long time uh without essentially getting like a bombardment of like snarky comments because this is like an essentially an impossible seemingly uh impossible topic. But I think I actually just like before I even get to any of the advice, right? Or any of the explanations like I just want to illustrate to you guys how how difficult it would be to to talk about this, right? So if I imagined like that there are like poor people, right?

[00:01:29]There's poor and then you got rich.

[00:01:32]There are different paths that could occur, right? So a poor person, it might be the case that they succeed in life, right? You're like hood rich. Okay, fair enough. And then there's poor people who don't succeed. Fair enough, too. There are rich people who succeed, which is obvious. And then you got these weirdos over here.

[00:01:53]Like, what the [ __ ] Like, how did you fail even though you're rich? Because we have a narrative for this, right? If you're poor and you succeed, it's like, oh yeah, you worked really hard. If you're poor and you failed, it's like, well, yeah, it's cuz you're poor. If you're rich and you succeed, oh yeah, small loan of a million dollars, right?

[00:02:11]But if you're rich and you [ __ ] up, it's like you have no excuse there. There's no justification for any of this. It's just kind of like no one really no one can really even summon any empathy for you, right? And I think the weird thing is that I'm going to explain why this is like so unusual is like I I work in college consulting, right? Uh, and I I still do college consulting now. I try to help people get into like top schools and whatnot. And there's usually like these four different categories, right?

[00:02:45]There's like poor people who like succeed and poor people who don't, whatever, right? But like there's people who um this was like definitely the case back in like my old uh, you know, my old uh, institution where I used to work.

[00:02:57]There would be these people who like they poured in a whole lot of money into college consulting and they would still fail. It's like, oh wow, like I poured in like uh 50 grand, 60 grand into college consulting and like I put in all this effort. I put in everything I possibly could and my parents love me.

[00:03:16]I'm like neurotypical, whatever, right?

[00:03:17]And like they still failed and that was just so brutal.

[00:03:23]There's no like there's no person though out there that could just be like, "Oh, this is what you're doing wrong or this is what the issue is because like we have a narrative for all those other um all those other people, right? Like if you're broke or if you're uh rich and successful, whatever, right? Like I don't really think anyone knows how to address these people because what ends up happening at least like in my old workplace, they just kind of let you get hung to dry, right? It's like oh well you know you can't do anything about it, right? Like too bad just time I guess, right? you're just kind of stuck with that uh shitty feeling. So, uh but I think the other thing that makes it so hard to empathize with these people who've essentially got like every single thing on the planet, right? Like they they've got uh what is it again? Let's see here. Uh basic amenities taken care of by parents, right? Uh failures have safety nets, right? Usually people can't even have that where you have the time, the underprivileged dream of a lot of time. This is like your greatest asset.

[00:04:20]There's like literally no excuse to fail. And I think the people who even just opening this video, right? Even just opening this video and seeing, oh, there's like boohoo, poor people who are like not able to succeed, right? Like they they have all of this stuff, but they can't succeed. It's very difficult probably even for my viewers to actually summon any empathy for these people. Um, and I think that it's very likely the case that you'll have something like this. Uh let's say like you know it's not even just money right like you could even like do this across disciplines. So let's say like um got a lot of money and then you also uh pretty privilege right that's like a really big one. Uh what else? Oh yeah you're like Nepo right?

[00:05:08]You have all of these things.

[00:05:11]It's it's so hard to be empathetic of people who are like this. it it's just why why do you have any reason to be sad? But it is the case that these people could still fail even if they have all three of these variables. It's just that our perception of this is that they're essentially impervious to any external negatives, right? like whatever I throw at these guys, whatever kind of bullets go their way, it's like, oh, you have this like protective force field because uh wealth and pretty privilege and nepo, it's like you're essentially immune. And I think that's a it's like a line of logic that I think happens a lot is when a person sees a privileged underachiever, they usually think, "Oh, that person has all of the things that I don't have.

[00:06:00]They have money. They have pretty privilege. They have nepo. I don't have that. They must not be capable of suffering the same way that I do.

[00:06:10]So that sucks. That really, really sucks. Um, not just because you're invalidated, but I think the core focus of the privilege underachiever's real suffering is something along the lines of like, and you know, forgive me because I'm trying to phrase this the best way I can. I still struggle with this, right?

[00:06:32]um is that these people probably are deprived of the very most basic fundamental human experience which is suffering right this person is although they're rich although they have pretty privilege they have nepo so on and so forth they can't suffer or at least their suffering is unjustified and everyone's suffering should be justified but like we don't even grant these people that and very justifiably so we don't grant these people that cuz like they they have all of these things that that we don't have. So, um it's a very admittedly dehumanizing experience, right? Um I think a really good example of this would be something like um oh there's a perfect one, right? Like uh if you're like a beautiful woman, right?

[00:07:19]You're a beautiful woman. It's like what reason do you have to be depressed?

[00:07:26]Everybody loves you. Everybody is whatever, right? They they don't really outsiders who are not the actors, they don't see what the actual girl is going through, right? They go, "Oh, yeah, like uh you're pretty and everybody loves you and everybody's po like everyone thinks you're popular, right? So on and so forth. You have no reason to be depressed." But what the girl sees would be something like everyone I'm surrounded by wants something out of me and I'm always surrounded by false smiles because people only would want me if they want to date me or surround me or whatever so on and so forth, right? So I I think that's like a really um excuse me uh it's a very big uh you know difficult problem for a lot of people who are under uh underprivileged but al excuse me uh privileged but also underachievers.

[00:08:15]So that brings me therefore to a conclusion where I think this is hard because like again I don't really think I come across a lot of people who talk about this so I can't really conclusively say oh this is like my solution so to speak but I do think that this is like about as close that I can get to a conclusion. Okay so um of course like if you guys have any different opinions you could just let me know. Okay. But the solution that I think for people who are privileged underachievers is that they need to relearn how to be brave.

[00:09:01]Okay, this is the core sort of like philosophy that they need to develop and nurture over time is they need to relearn how to be brave. So what do I mean by this?

[00:09:16]What will happen if you're a privileged underachiever is you're going to be kind of hit in the ego, right? So I want you to like uh let's reread this, right?

[00:09:27]Like nobody talks about the internal shame and discomfort of wasting the potential that comes from a place of privilege, right? Wow, I wasted all this potential, right? This is like a judgment. How could you be this dumb?

[00:09:41]Right? Like how could you like we gave you everything? How are how are you still struggling? Right? Uh having all the means and resources yet failing to achieve something significant. It's when you realize that you have no external factors to blame, right? Like these are all of the reasons you should not Oh, sorry. Excuse me. Uh, these are all of the reasons that you should not have struggled and you're still struggling.

[00:10:03]And I think the thing that makes this so shameful is almost like it's oh god, how how do I phrase this? Let me see if I could phrase this right. It's like when you've done everything that you possibly could to succeed and you're still failing, you're kind of like an NPC, right? You're like an NPC cuz it's like you're expecting, oh my god, like I have all of these all these buffs, right? I have all these buffs. I should be like a final boss.

[00:10:37]But in reality, it's like when you actually die, you're like dropping common loot, right? You're like, "Oh, dude, I'm not even a boss. I'm just I'm just a regular NPC." This is like the most dehumanizing thing on the [ __ ] planet, bro.

[00:10:55]If it's like I tried everything I possibly can and I'm no better than like an NPC or like a a random mob, right?

[00:11:02]I'm I'm I'm just a goblin, right, in a dungeon. This is like that's like horrible, right? Like and um I think the shame of being an NPC inexorably leaves uh leads to something like this. I'm just going to uh phrase it a little easier like this. It's going to be um I'm going to draw you guys a chart, right? So it's like I try so hard and I don't live up to expectations.

[00:11:33]Right now what will inexraably happen if I don't live up to expectations is I'm going to try to avoid this right avoid by taking the safe route.

[00:11:59]Okay, I'm going to just make this a little uh closer. Right. So yeah, it's like I'm gonna essentially try to take the safe route as a result of this because I don't want the shame of having to work as hard as I possibly can and have all the potential. Like I don't want all of these investors pouring in their hearts and souls into all of my efforts. I don't want people to care so much about me only for them to get disappointed by me. It's like, oh god, I don't don't look at me, bro. Like don't don't have any expectations about me. uh because inevitably what's going to happen with that is I'm just going to feel like wow I I I can't live up to those expectations right I can't exactly uh have any uh resolution to that so what will happen is if you do this what do you think's going to happen if I take the safe route right then what's inexitably going to happen if I uh you know only take the safe route it's I'm not going to live up to expectations. Oh, [ __ ] Right.

[00:13:11]So, what do you think is going to happen if I do that? If I don't live up to expectations, I'm going to avoid again, right? I'm going to avoid the thing that I know that I need to do and then I'm going to take the safe route. Oh, I'm just going to like kind of, you know, take a a milk bread, you know, like a soft noodly arm approach. And then that's going to make me not live up to expectations again. and then oh my god I'm going to avoid right and so this avoidance leads to taking the safe route which leads to not living up to expectations again again again again again again right this is a horrendous cycle this is a deadly deadly deadly cycle and to be fair it's like there's there's no resolute answer to this but I do think that like the best answer I could possibly give is to relearn how to be brave. This is like the thing I mentioned before. Right now, before I get to this, I do genuinely believe that there's another answer to this that I think like is I've been thinking about this for a while, right? Uh and I think it's probably going to be something that some of you guys uh my viewers are probably going to be thinking too is well, if I have this cycle, isn't the answer to just not have expectations, right? Shouldn't I just remove this?

[00:14:33]If I dispel all expectations, then the cycle's broken, right? And I I think that's technically in theory true.

[00:14:44]It's just that if I look at people in real life, I don't think I see this happen in real life. Right. I I it's it sounds very correct though, right? I I would totally understand if people were to say, "Oh, just suspend all expectations, right?" Um, but I just don't see that happening. It just seems more of like very zen-like, oh yes, uh, I will suspend all of my expectations. I will suspend all of my earthly desires, right? Oh, I am levitating in the air.

[00:15:15]Like, it's just, it seems something that you would say to a person who wants to be like enlightened, but that's a very high order to ask of people, right? It's essentially like, oh, this would be technically true, but um you're essentially asking them to to achieve enlightenment. It's like [ __ ] like very very difficult. Tall order, right?

[00:15:35]But I do think like something that would be easier for people to do is to relearn how to be brave. Because the issue with being a um what would you call it? Like a privileged underachiever is that you're essentially taught to not be brave. You're taught that you shouldn't be going out there to to try new things because if you do that, what do you think happened before, right? What happened before when everybody was buying my stock essentially, right? What happened when everybody was bullish on me? It's like everybody like failed, right? Or I failed everyone. Everyone uh was putting their hopes up on me. They were they're uh investing in me. They're pouring in all this money and I'm not able to live up to expectations. It's like I would be very very conservative-minded as a result of this.

[00:16:24]So, I'm going to try to give you guys um an example of this in in the real world so that maybe you guys can relate. Uh I know quite a lot of people in my life who are like in the art industry. Uh which is funny actually because I I usually work with like computer science engineering kind of kids. So like they usually don't know like a lot about the art industry. They're like, "Oh, like art is just forever unemployment, right?" But there's actually a lot to art industry that people don't know. And one of the things that's interesting about the art industry is that there's like this big um there's this big funnel that's like very very sweaty, I guess, is what you could call it, right?

[00:17:01]They're um I'm going to show you what this looks like.

[00:17:05]There's different elements of the art industry.

[00:17:09]There's like, you know, traditional and then you've got illustration.

[00:17:17]Uh, you also got animation, right?

[00:17:21]And then you've got like what would you call it? Like entertainment design.

[00:17:31]And entertainment design is the one that I think well actually these two uh entertainment and illustration are the ones that I'm like most exposed to with other people. And it's especially the entertainment design people who are super sweaty. They're super hardworking and super like go-getter like, "Yeah, yeah, I want to go. I want to go."

[00:17:50]Right? Like these are the guys who are usually trying to go for places like Riot Games, uh, you know, Sony Santa Monica, right?

[00:17:57]Uh, you know, like other companies like maybe like uh even like you know, like uh places like Nvidia, right? Like places that would uh need entertainment designers. Like this is this is so hard for a lot of people because what happens is these people will be super sweaty and they'll work for four years in like an art school. And by the way, like when they're working for four years, I'm going to illustrate this here. 1 2 3 4.

[00:18:27]Like usually the first year is useless.

[00:18:30]The second year is useless. The third year is kind of okayish but mostly useless. And it's the fourth year that's actually really helpful. you're only ever really learning something in like, you know, a few classes, right? It's like a small minority of classes. And they will like work really really hard in this time, but they will fall through with expectations because like it it'll be there's something like this, right?

[00:18:52]Um, and make this smaller.

[00:18:59]These art types, what will happen? This is so [ __ ] weird. I don't know if any other like art um you know design majors or like so on and so forth like actually notice this but like there'll be these people who like they need to reach this to be like successful right and this is like the bottom of the barrel right they're already over here they're already over here they only need this to succeed And when they're so close, they don't work toward this anymore. And I'm beginning to think that a lot of the times like the reason that they don't do this is because of the same dynamic that happened here, right? It's like, wow, I graduated from college. My uh parents paid for all of my uh art school tuition, which is like a lot of [ __ ] money, right? All of my teachers are kind of like, you know, cheering me on.

[00:19:57]They're they're hoping that I'll get like a top studio like uh Sony Santa Monica or Riot Games or you know like Naughty Dog or whatever the [ __ ] right?

[00:20:04]And like there's all this [ __ ] hope.

[00:20:06]There's all this [ __ ] hope for me to succeed and instead of actually getting a job right out of college, I don't, right? And it's like, oh, but you know, if you work a little bit harder, you could do this, but like they don't have the courage to do this because what if I achieve what if I end up with the same failure of this, right?

[00:20:25]I think that's like a very common thing that seems to happen in the art industry, at least like from from what I've seen, right? Uh it looks like a lot of people what they'll do is they'll say, "Well, you know what? I'm going to take the safe route because if I continue putting in more effort into art after already investing four years of school into this, right? It's like I don't think my heart can take any more failure. I don't think my heart can stand having all of this all these privileges and still being nothing better than an NPC. Like they they just can't tolerate the uh dehumanization, so to speak. So, they're like, "Yeah, I don't think I'm going to like I don't think this little bit is worth it anymore. I'm just going to like work at a boba shop or something or I'm just going to uh, you know, do a different major. I'm just going to whatever, right?" Like, they they can't really um tolerate that. So, I hope that this helps this. I'm going to admit though, like at the end of the day, like this is not a resolute solution to everything as as long as this [ __ ] video is, right? Um, but it is still a topic that I think is really important to shed light into because man, like I've had a lot of um, you know, consult, not consultants, I had a lot of clients of mine who like came up to me uh, for transfers. They're like, "Oh my god, like I I wasn't able to get into top schools even though I was putting in all this [ __ ] effort, right? I was uh putting in, you know, four years of effort into trying to get into a top school." And my parents were putting in so much money for college consulting and it just didn't work out, right? And so I'd be like, "Oh my god, like what kind of schools you get rejected to, right?" And they're like everywhere. And so, um, that's when I would start working with them, right?

[00:22:06]And um God, yeah, know it's just really it's really [ __ ] you know, cuz like I think there's a lot of people who do fall under that category where they they've had everything. They've had everything and they still don't have justified underachievement, which is just man, it's the most uh invalidating thing on the planet, right? To not have a valid uh form of suffering. But hopefully this helps. uh if you guys are struggling with something similar to this or I'm really really open to this.

[00:22:36]I'm just so curious. I want to know what some of you guys have to think about this cuz I I just I don't think I see enough people talking about this, right?

[00:22:44]So, uh yeah, feel free to let me know uh in the comment section down below. I am also open to uh if you guys need anything like college consulting, college advising, uh you know, passion project assistance, so on and so forth, feel free to reach out via email in description box below. Uh college essay applications as well. I'm totally happy to help out with that. Um, other than that, thank you so much for being patient with me, guys. I will talk to you then. See you later.