What does a narcissist think when you reject them?

Added: 2026-05-13

[00:00:00]When you reject a narcissist and they force you to reverse discard them because they've been acting so horribly, they're going to assume that you're leaving them for someone else. Even if they have absolutely zero evidence that you ever cheated and you never did and you can't even think about dating someone else ever again, they're still going to assume that. To understand this, you need to know two premises.

[00:00:23]One, narcissists have overinflated egos that shatter like glass. And two, narcissists can never be alone. Because they're the most selfish people in the world, they assume that everybody else thinks like them and they are constantly scouting for people to keep on the back burner because they can never get enough external validation from just one person. They need multiple sources. They assume that everyone else needs this, too. When you break up with them and they're not expecting it, they feel so out of control that their ego shatters into a million pieces. And because they still cannot take any accountability for their toxic, atrocious behavior towards you, they assume it must be because they found someone else. See, a narcissist can't possibly fathom that you would choose being alone over being with them.

[00:01:16]Even if they've cheated, even if they've abused you. Because they're never okay with being alone. So, if you picture a person who is not self-aware whatsoever and doesn't realize that their actions have consequences, meaning if they abuse you, you might choose to leave, if they don't even understand that premise to begin with, then they're like, "Why would this person leave me? It can't be because of me. I'm perfect. I'm great."

[00:01:44]That's the delusions of grandeur, right?

[00:01:46]"I'm the most perfect partner. I'm superior to others." So, if they're going off of the premise that everyone else thinks like them and they are perfect, then the only conclusion they can come to is you must have found someone else. They have no evidence of this besides how they would act in the situation. And a narcissist's lack of empathy and gross sense of entitlement means that they really don't care when they're emotionally cheating on you, physically cheating on you, or lining people up on the back burner. They don't care how it impacts you. They never even think about that. So, their mentality is if I'm doing it, they're doing it. And the reason why you are never going to talk them out of the fact that you have never cheated and you're not even capable of that is because that would rock their entire worldview that it's okay to be alone. You don't always have to be with someone. So, this is why when you leave them and you put up strong boundaries and you go for good and you say I'm done for real, they will almost always say there's somebody else, isn't there? It's del- lusional thinking, it's offensive to who you are as a person and your morality. This person does not know you at all and you should go no contact.