Break the cycle: Real talk on saving your relationship.

Added: 2026-05-15

[00:00:00]So, go to counseling together. Read a book together. Have the talks. Schedule weekly check-ins where you're both actually able to be honest about what's working and what's not. Be vulnerable with each other talking about each other's legitimate needs for closeness.

[00:00:14]Work on how you fight. Start learning how to interrupt that negative cycle of conflict. And if you can't or won't do that without fighting, that's your sign that you need to get some help because your relationship is at stake. You got into this relationship for a reason. Why did you even start it? Because you enjoyed feeling close to them. Don't let your shame or guilt come and steal that away and push them away because you're too afraid of facing yourself and admitting this is scary. And listen, I've done the work. I'm doing the work.

[00:00:45]And it is scary. Learning how to go deep within yourself, learning how to be vulnerable and open up to someone again, learning how to be a safe place for someone to tell you their negative emotions and vice versa.

[00:00:55]I get it. It's scary.

[00:00:57]But I'm just here to tell you I've seen the other side. I've seen the connection and intimacy that's possible.

[00:01:04]And it's worth it. You don't have to follow the same patterns that your mom or dad did. Those walls that you've put up, they might keep you safe, but they're going to cost you your most intimate relationships.

[00:01:15]Dare to be different. And I'll warn you, different isn't easy. Growth isn't comfortable. But just like working out, it gets easier the more that you do it.

[00:01:23]And one day you'll look back and be so glad that you started. Thank you so much for watching. Stay curious. Listen to each other.

[00:01:31]Can't wait to see you in the next one.