Normal things that are RUDE in the Nordic countries | TEACHER PAUL REACTS 🇳🇴🇸🇪🇩🇰

[00:00:00]Yo, what's up guys? Teacher Paul here and today we have a video request from Susan who is saying the following.

[00:00:07]Kelly Louise Killjoy is a Danish comedian and constant creator best known for her viral Nordic class catches on TikTok where the Nordic countries are portrayed as characters to humorously explore Scandinavian culture and stereotypes.

[00:00:25]With German inside.

[00:00:29]Normal things that are rude in the Nordic countries. Let's check this out and if you are watching from Scandinavia or any other Nordic countries let me know if this is true. By the way, we have some um scarves over here. I I don't have Danish scarves, but I do have one for Sweden because of the World Cup, right?

[00:00:52]Unfortunately, Denmark is not in the World Cup, unfortunately.

[00:00:57]And then we have Norway as well.

[00:01:00]So, let me know where you are watching from. Although I don't have one for Denmark, I do have one for these two.

[00:01:11]But, don't worry.

[00:01:13]Your brothers, Denmark, will represent you in the World Cup. You shall not be forgotten.

[00:01:22]And man, I saw the last Denmark match.

[00:01:25]It ended early because of a a health scare. Dang, that was tough, but hopefully everything is okay.

[00:01:35]>> When visiting the Nordic countries, people won't actually tell you when you're being rude. They'll just silently judge you. So, um I'm here to help. So, here are some completely normal things that are generally considered rude in the Nordics. I'm Danish, by the way.

[00:01:49]>> So, you will silently judge me if I become rude accidentally.

[00:01:56]Oh yeah, Finland is also in the World Cup, right?

[00:02:01]Or no?

[00:02:02]Did Finland go to the World Cup?

[00:02:04]No, Finland played against Germany.

[00:02:07]Finland is not in the World Cup. Okay.

[00:02:10]Finland is also a cousin, that's what you said. Okay.

[00:02:12]>> are some completely normal things that are generally considered rude in the Nordics. I'm Danish, by the way, and a lot of what's considered rude in my part of the world actually comes down to time. Because being late for anything is rude. And before you say that's just like Swiss people, no, there's a difference because Nordic people hate being both late and early. I was in Switzerland in May last year, and what I learned was that Swiss people like being on time so much that they actually kind of expect you to be early. Like every day on that very well-scheduled trip, they would ask us like, let's say we were meeting up at 3:00, they would then ask us at like 20 minutes past 2:00 if we could be there 15 minutes before.

[00:02:56]>> No, that's too early.

[00:02:57]>> Nordic people really plan their time according to when you're meeting up. So like, it's like 5 minutes early or 5 minutes late, no more, no less.

[00:03:05]Preferably exactly on time.

[00:03:07]>> That's that's the right thing. Also, Nordic people will very often That's nice. Five late or five early, but two early, it's offensive.

[00:03:15]It's offensive. I've talked about this before, like, you know, if you have like a a meeting scheduled, or if you tell someone I'll be there at 5:00 and if they're too early, it feels like, you know, I need to rush. It's like when someone opens the door for you and you are in the distance, but you don't want to run to the door, and the person keeps holding that door for you, and you feel awkward because you don't want them to hold the door for you.

[00:03:44]And then you have to do that jog so that you can get there faster so people will stop holding the door for you. It kind of feels that way, you know? Because when someone opens the door for you. So, I don't want people to arrive there early and then say, "Hey, I was waiting for you." But, we organized a specific time, so you know, you weren't supposed to be there early. I understand that. I really understand it.

[00:04:08]>> Often apologize for even being 1 minute late. Sorry to the Swiss people, but early feels like pressure. Like, even if it's the other way around and it's like my guest who's arriving early, like I Now I have to host you when I'm not even ready myself and I I can't do that. Just be on time. Like, I'm just talking about it.

[00:04:27]>> Showing up unannounced at somebody's house >> Oh, no. No.

[00:04:30]>> It's rude. With Nordic people, it's all about respecting our time and as mentioned, we often plan our time very carefully according to when we're meeting you.

[00:04:42]Um and these meetups are often scheduled like weeks or months beforehand, so >> Even if I have nothing to do, I am bored in my house. If you show up unannounced, I'm going to still be angry cuz I I wasn't prepared for it, you know? I was going to be Dude, I still still even if you don't pre-organize a Listen.

[00:05:05]>> [laughter] >> Don't show up to people's houses without announcing.

[00:05:09]>> The door may be open, but it doesn't mean the schedule is. But yeah, even close friends and family text first.

[00:05:15][music] This leads me on to canceling plans last minute.

[00:05:18]>> I hate that, too.

[00:05:19]>> good reason, this is more rude than saying no up front because you don't feel like it. Again, Nordic people mentally plan around you for days, weeks, if not months. Um >> I must be Nordic.

[00:05:31]>> Respect our time and we will love you for it. This is a two-way street, by the way. Another and maybe less obvious respect our time thing is speaking to people without a purpose. It's actually kind of rude here. Nordic people often don't do small talk much when running errands and just trying to get through everyday life. And more often than not, I think we actually avoid [music] it actively. If you talk to us, we will assume there's a reason. Otherwise, we get confused and awkward. So, if you've ever had a a conversation with a Nordic person where you thought, well, didn't they like me or this got awkward very quickly, it's because that Nordic person was more than likely trying to figure out what you wanted.

[00:06:13]>> Yeah, is there something you want to say?

[00:06:15]>> Yeah.

[00:06:15]>> I have a very real example because I was in California when I was a teenager. I think I was I was either 18 or 19 and I was standing in this queue at a roller coaster in Disneyland and this lady behind me began speaking and I I kind of it it sounded like she was speaking to me and she was saying literally saying, are you the wolf then?

[00:06:39]And I just turned to her.

[00:06:40]>> Are you the wolf?

[00:06:41]>> I just turned to her like this and looked away again. And even though she was looking directly into my eyes and and speaking up so that I could hear her, it was only when I got back to the hotel it dawned on me that I was wearing a t-shirt with a wolf on my back eating a sheep. So, she was definitely talking to me. I I didn't it did not cross my mind that she could possibly be saying that to me. She was just making casual conversation and my Danish brain could not comprehend.

[00:07:14]>> But why?

[00:07:15]>> If any of that makes sense, I don't know, but >> Why?

[00:07:17]>> just know that I think about this lady to this day and I am so sorry. I must have seemed like the rudest person ever.

[00:07:24]I just my Nordic brain could not comprehend that you wanted to just talk to me without a practical reason.

[00:07:29]Over-politeness can be very rude and that's another one where US Americans and Nordic people often misunderstand each other. I We can call this >> Listen, it I don't like when people want to do stuff for me like open the door for me or you know I I don't like those type of things because it feels like dude I'm not I'm not important you know I I am exactly like you so you don't need to make me anything or do me do anything or oh let me hold your back for you no it's my bag let me carry my bag it's my weight I really don't like that you know And yeah when people talk to to me without having a purpose I also feel the same way I feel awkward I smile but I don't know how to respond it's not that I don't like it it's nice when people try to talk to you but it's just I don't know how to respond so I understand what she's saying here and I feel like I'm a little bit Nordic and I don't want to be rude it's just that it makes me feel uncomfortable like I don't know people trying to do stuff for for me like hold my bag or carry stuff interesting just move here already I'm just saying I understand it makes so much sense I don't know if it's a Brazilian thing or if it's a specific Nordic thing but I understand what she's saying here >> one asking questions you don't want real answers to as well like how are you is a question like we will often assume you want the real answer to and that answer is often very personal especially if you don't know us very well so rude personally I hate this question like because it's often asked right as you walk through a door and you're like wow can I sit down before we talk about my feelings and I know it's not meant to be taken that way but it just feels like an act to me when I know the other person is assuming that I will say fine how are you in general or at least in my experience Nordic people don't really like pointless conversation like that speaking loudly in public places is considered rude Honestly, this one is probably valid a lot of other places around Europe as well and it is one of the main reasons that we give you as American tourists a hard time. It's one of those things where we won't directly confront you, but let's say you're at a restaurant and you're speaking very loudly, everybody else at the restaurant will have made eye contact and just silently agreed that you're annoying. Actually, it very much gives the Nordic people something to agree upon and come together over. So, >> It's pick me energy, you know, it's energy that people like Why? Like can't you speak at a normal level voice without being scandalous?

[00:10:17]Just, you know, respect other people's conversation as well. They want to talk as well. They want to have a quiet evening as well.

[00:10:24]You don't need to shout.

[00:10:26]It It's just You don't need to, you know.

[00:10:30]>> I don't know, maybe you should just keep doing it. Sitting next to someone when there's ample space around is rude. This is a classic.

[00:10:37]>> And this is a I don't think this is a Nordic thing or this is a what I'm about to say. I think this is a man thing what I'm about to say. Not what she's saying. What I'm about to say. Stalls in the bathroom.

[00:10:49]Maybe women will understand the idea, but men if you're standing next to someone in a bathroom stall not a stall, what you call it?

[00:11:02]It's not Is it a stall?

[00:11:04]Dude, don't stand next to each other. Just if there's other available ones separate.

[00:11:11]Why why why you like you're you're you're you're You know what I'm saying? It's like it's just Why?

[00:11:18]Question is why.

[00:11:20]Dude, if there's so many empty places, why sit right next to the person?

[00:11:25]Thank you, Nami. Is that how you call it?

[00:11:29]Thank you for the copy request. Is that how you actually call it?

[00:11:32]>> Sitting next to someone when there's ample space around is rude. This is a classic Nordic meme, but it's true. We do not like people sitting next to us when we can see there's space around for them to >> Exactly. If there's space around, my bag is sitting next to me.

[00:11:51]My bag is sitting on the the seat next to me, so nobody will sit next to me.

[00:11:56]Urinal, that's the that's how you call it. If you're in the urinal and somebody comes right next to you, come on, that's so disrespectful, man. That's so rude.

[00:12:07]Dude, it the rule of thumb is if you are in the middle, then another person has to go in the at the the the the at least one or two urinals away from you.

[00:12:22]>> divide themselves upon. If you sit next to a Nordic person in an more or less empty bus, they will assume there's something wrong with you or that you will cause them harm. Or at least the thought will go through their heads. We are very big on the respect of the personal space, so respect time and respect space. Time and [music] space. And and we're good. Like the biggest Nordic ongoing joke during the pandemic was that we hated the restrictions because now we had to stay closer to each other.

[00:12:49]>> [laughter] >> It's a little sad. Using formal titles are kind of rude here. Like unless you're addressing the king or queen, don't. I know it's used to to show respect in a lot of other places in the world, but it does not feel respectful here. How do I explain that? It it feels like impur- >> Can you imagine? This is the worst nightmare for a Nordic person. You're in an empty bus or in an empty airplane.

[00:13:15]Well, airplanes, you don't have the choice, but let's say a bus. You're in an an empty bus and then somebody sits next to you and starts small talking.

[00:13:24]Dude, I know I would want to stand up and and go sit somewhere else. It's the worst nightmare, man. I I mean, imagine that scenario. You are in an empty bus or an empty train.

[00:13:36]Somebody sits next to you while there are so many other seats and they start asking, "How are you?

[00:13:43]Where are you from?" Making small talk.

[00:13:47]And you know that you have to sit there for an hour.

[00:13:50]Dude, I would just stand up and say, "I'm not interested."

[00:13:54]I don't know what you're selling, but I'm not interesting, buddy. I'm not interested, buddy.

[00:13:59]>> Does not feel respectful here. How do I explain that? It feels like impersonal and distant. Like even doctors and teachers will will think it's weird if you use formal titles with them. I've said it before. Like if somebody called me by my surname or last name, I I would feel like a tax form. And [laughter] if somebody called me ma'am, I would feel like I was 100 years old. Hate that.

[00:14:21]Ma'am, what do you mean, ma'am? Bragging about pretty much >> Or or Lena, pretend you're on the phone.

[00:14:27]Pretend to be sleeping or pretend to be on the phone. That's the classic one.

[00:14:31]When you see someone that you kind of are acquainted to, you pick up the phone and you're like, "Oh, yes. Hi."

[00:14:36]Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:14:38]Pretend you're on the phone.

[00:14:40]>> 100 years old. Hate that. Ma'am, what do you mean, ma'am? Bragging about pretty much anything is rude. And this ties very much into the whole like people being loud part as well because Nordic culture is a very conflict avoidant and don't stand out-ish kind of culture. And that's very much due to our culture being influenced heavily by the law of Jante. And the law of Jante or the law in Danish is this Scandinavian social norm that heavily discourages standing out. Instead, it promotes like humility and equality by saying you shouldn't think you're better or more >> She pointed to her hair. Yeah, she stands out with that hair. I I her hair.

[00:15:20]It's a very nice shade. It fits her her sweater or shirt or whatever she's wearing. How do you call it?

[00:15:26]>> Instead it promotes like humility and equality by saying you shouldn't think you're better or more important than others. And bragging just goes heavily against that. Like you can say you got a new job, but just don't brag about your big fat salary. Like we would very much like to hear about the job, but just not about your new social status. An example I still remember to this day is back when I was in school. I had saved a higher amount of money for my like occupation and age as a student back then. And [music] um I was very proud of myself. And during a conversation with my friends, I just casually dropped that info.

[00:16:03]Granted it was a very weird information to drop in the middle of that conversation, but I will never forget the absolute stink eye I got from my friends, mind you, >> [laughter] >> when I did that. I have touched lightly on this one before, but tipping cultures are very awkward to Nordic people. Like I just don't understand why you can't just pay your employees. Sorry, it always gets me a little bit pissed off, but like when the price isn't the actual price, it just feels dishonest to me.

[00:16:33]And that is even though payment terminals are now also doing this in the Nordics. Like at a lot of random stores, you get this option to tip before you pay for your stuff. And it just creates this really awkward silence between you and the person behind the counter because more often than not it's >> And also, let me just say before she finishes, let me just say one thing.

[00:16:56]I was talking about this also with Whiplash the other day, and the tipping culture, it's not only about giving a little bit more to the service provider.

[00:17:09]You know, if you want to pay a little bit more because you understand the whole culture that you know, the The aren't paying enough the like for the waiters to be there. Fine, you're going to give them a little bit more to help them. But what we or we were talking about and what I don't agree with is, "Listen, if you buy a water, the waiter will come and bring you that water.

[00:17:32]What is the effort that he put there?

[00:17:35]Walking, right? He walked to your table and got you your water.

[00:17:40]Now, if you are ordering a beer, you're going to pay a little bit more.

[00:17:44]If you order wine, you're going to pay a little bit more.

[00:17:49]So, it it depends on how much you're paying on your bill, because it's part of the percentage. So, if I'm paying if I'm buying one water, that's 10% of I don't know, €1, €2, or I don't know how many kroners that would be.

[00:18:10]But if you're buying a champagne, the same effort of walking towards your table will cost you 10% of I don't know, how much is a bottle? 50?

[00:18:20]So, you're going to pay five, sometimes 10 times more for the same effort of walking over and getting you your beverage.

[00:18:31]So, that's what I don't understand and I don't agree with.

[00:18:35]Because depending on the restaurant, depending on the meal, depending on what you buy, depending on the drink you buy, you will pay extra on tips.

[00:18:47]But the effort of doing that work is the same.

[00:18:53]So, why do you have to pay more if they're doing the same job? They're doing the same work, you know? That's what really gets me.

[00:18:59]And also, I have had to pay a tip on a self-service buffet, where you get your own food, where you get your own drink, and you pay at the counter.

[00:19:17]So, there's nobody actually working there except for the chef, the cooks.

[00:19:23]I don't understand it.

[00:19:26]But, you if you do want to tip me, then you can go over to buy me coffee.

[00:19:30]>> [laughter] >> No, I'm just joking about that.

[00:19:34]Oh, man.

[00:19:36]It just doesn't make sense.

[00:19:39]>> Like, at a lot of random stores, you get this option to tip before you pay for your stuff. And it just creates this really awkward silence between you and the person behind the counter, because more often than not, it's it's the very first time you're even speaking to this person. And I just I don't understand. Just pay your employees. I Not taking off your shoes inside someone's home is rude.

[00:20:07]Just saying this pisses me off even more. I I have nowhere else to speak about this, but the one thing that has confused me the most about playing this game my entire life is the fact that most of these houses, you you just walk straight into the kitchen or living space. Like, what do you What do you mean you don't have mud rooms? You just walk straight into where you eat I don't I don't understand that concept as a Nordic person. Like, there's snow everywhere outside right now. I Really, seriously, people with shoes on inside, you just leave them on on the couch and then your bed. I I don't I don't get it. I just hope >> This is interesting because we've seen this culture from Korea as well. We've seen a like a video that talks about this as well. And it's interesting because I don't know Nordic countries use do that, taking their shoes before, which makes a lot of sense, you know. I have indoor shoes and I have outdoor shoes. Actually, not shoes, but I have um flip-flops, indoor flip-flops, and outdoor flip-flops. And, you know, I always remove before going into the the room because it's dirty, man.

[00:21:12]>> Well, hardly with my full chest don't get it. If you want me to actually be verbal about throwing you out of my house, just keep your shoes on. This is getting a little rancy. I'm sorry. Um but I am [laughter] an okay person. So, I guess this should offend me. Honking your car >> You know that song? I'm not rude, I'm just a Norwegian.

[00:21:32]>> car is rude. In Denmark, it's even illegal to honk for any other reason other than as a warning of danger or if somebody has not seen you. If you honk, people will assume something is wrong.

[00:21:44]So, if you're an impatient person, too bad. Uh you can't honk for that reason.

[00:21:48]Also, jaywalking is kind of rude in the Nordics. Uh take this one a little lightly because everybody jaywalks a bit. But Nordic people and especially Scandinavians are rule followers. So, if you're out traveling like to bigger cities like London and and such.

[00:22:03]>> London.

[00:22:04]>> Just know that the people waiting for the light to switch to green at pedestrian walks and such, they're they're often from Scandinavia or or Denmark mostly. And that's not to say that Nordic people or Scandinavians don't break the rules. Like we do, but mostly when it's done quietly and nobody else is affected. Again, respecting everybody's personal space and time.

[00:22:26]Like Nordic people as a whole are actually very open-minded as long as you respect those two things. And just remember silence is not perceived as passive-aggressive here. In fact, we assume that silence means everybody is comfortable. And before I go, I just wanted to thank everybody >> Nice.

[00:22:42]>> for 100,000 subscribers. Subscribe so I could get more. Like, comment.

[00:22:47]>> Isn't that bragging?

[00:22:49]>> [laughter] >> Wash my floors, all that. See you next time. Bye.

[00:22:55]>> Oh, man. No, I it's funny. I'm joking about her bragging and all.

[00:23:01]Because, you know, she like you don't brag, but I have a play button with 100,000 subscribers. I'm kidding. You know, obviously I know she's not bragging. It's a joke. But guys, I feel like I understand Nordic culture. And the funny thing is that while a lot of these things are rude to Nordic countries, the opposite is rude to other countries. Like if you go to my country or depending on where you are because my country is big and different cities have different rules, different norms. But if you go to a specific place in my country, for example, for example, in the countryside or the north of the country, and the the south of my country is a little bit more of um European, I would say, descendants. But the north, if you go there or depending on where you are, also the countryside, and you don't make small talk, you're being rude.

[00:24:01]If you don't ask, "How are you?" or say hello, you're being rude.

[00:24:06]If you don't tip in the United States, for example, you're being rude. So, the opposite is rude.

[00:24:14]Do you understand?

[00:24:16]Sometimes, for example, in a party, if you don't arrive late, you're being rude.

[00:24:22]It's interesting. It's interesting that different places have different cultures and sometimes it's the complete opposite. Like if you don't tip in a American in an American restaurant, don't go back in that place because they're they're going to spit on their food. I'm kidding, not everybody does that, but um they're still they're just not going to want to give you service.

[00:24:43]Like they're they're going to you're going to be known for the person who didn't tip, you know.

[00:24:48]But anyways, exactly, read up the country you're visiting before you go there because sometimes you're trying to be nice and you're trying to be respectful, but you're doing the opposite. Like for example, did you know some places in my country, if you remove your shoes indoors, you're being rude?

[00:25:06]Cuz this is not your house. This is the mentality.

[00:25:09]Why are you removing your shoes, your stinky socks, you know?

[00:25:14]It's not your house. Like it's the same as opening my fridge.

[00:25:18]Not you're taking your shoes off in my house, now you want to open my fridge.

[00:25:21]What do what else? You know what I'm saying? What you're going to put your feet up on my couch, up on my coffee table?

[00:25:28]It's kind of like that mentality. So, a lot of places don't like that you remove your shoes. It feels like you're too comfortable in my house.

[00:25:39]I know that sounded weird, but some places it is exactly that.

[00:25:44]Cuz I'm not giving you the liberty or the you know, the intimacy of removing your shoes or or opening my fridge or or you know, going into my bedroom.

[00:25:57]Kind of like that.

[00:25:58]You know, if it's your family, yeah, sure. You can remove your shoes, feel free, feel yourself at home. But if it's a stranger removing their shoes, it feels weird. It feels awkward, you know?

[00:26:13]Anyways, different culture, different rules.

[00:26:18]Look up before you travel. Thank you guys for watching. Thank you Whiplash for the request. Guys, who's going to win the World Cup?

[00:26:27]I'll see you guys next time. Thank you so much Susan for requesting. If you want to request a video just like Susan did, go over to Buy Me a Coffee. Link is in the pinned comments and I'll see you soon.

[00:26:35]Uh don't be rude. Bye-bye. Take care.