DR ELADU nemboozi ku FAMILY PLANNING.

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[00:00:08][music] [music] Resume.chech.

[00:00:32][laughter] HELLO.

[00:00:43][screaming] [music] YEAH.

[00:01:04]>> [music] [music] >> NIGELOOP.

[00:01:16][music] [music] SO, welcome to yet another edition of Kasuku Live. Y speak to the doctor. This is where we are today.

[00:01:59]Emmanuel.

[00:02:00]Oh, how are you, sir? [laughter] How is life's good? [laughter] Sorry.

[00:02:22]So, [laughter] [laughter] Emmanuel, >> yes.

[00:02:32]>> Means we were born on Christmas day.

[00:02:34]>> Means God is with us.

[00:02:36]>> No. No. But it also means you are born on Christmas day.

[00:02:39]>> Your birthday comes on Christmas, right?

[00:02:41]>> Unfortunately, no. [laughter] Isn't that mascar?

[00:02:48]>> It's not mascar. [laughter] >> My mother said come rain, come sunshine.

[00:02:53]She had to give me a bad word. So >> the name >> the name >> God is with us.

[00:02:57]>> God is with us.

[00:02:58]>> Okay. Um gynecologist.

[00:03:12]You call it [ __ ] doctor.

[00:03:28]That is a vet doctor [laughter] in this language of ours. The slang that one may mean something else.

[00:03:39]>> Anyway, yes. Uh our viewers, thank you very much for for keeping up with you are you well people love you so much.

[00:03:50]>> Thank you.

[00:03:50]>> People listen to you everywhere I go.

[00:03:52]They keep saying the way kasuku kasuku is very difficult. [laughter] But how do you sit with him?

[00:03:59]>> How do you sit with him?

[00:04:00]>> Have conversations with him.

[00:04:02]>> And I tell them I first pray before [laughter] cuz I do not know what you'll see.

[00:04:07]>> I know. I know.

[00:04:08]>> Yeah. But they are very happy and we thank them for really uh keeping up and asking the questions. Sometimes I go through uh the the the lives and the sessions we've shared and I see so many questions and and I think maybe one of these times we can come and just answer the question some of >> and actually that is the whole core of why we do this. I don't know. We've actually not paid attention to that part and I think going forward we need to but we also have the numbers living results.

[00:05:08]If you ask the question, you can move to the golden living in So family planning when someone says family planning >> what do they mean?

[00:05:34]>> So they simply mean methods that can be used to one prevent pregnancies and allow for this person to prepare and space child birth.

[00:05:46]>> Yeah. So they're just methods that are being used.

[00:05:50]>> Yeah. So what available uh family planning methods can you break down for us >> for family planning? Uh family planning really looks at how the normal system functions.

[00:06:03]>> Uh for women they have what we call a cycle, what we call the menstrual cycle.

[00:06:08]>> That menstrual cycle starts uh with chemicals or hormones being released from the brain. they begin to the ovaries and then those chemicals cause the ovaries to ovulate.

[00:06:21]>> Eventually the [clears throat] egg is released. So if the egg is not fertilized, that person goes into a period. So that's a normal menstrual cycle. Keeps on repeating itself every month, every so it's supposed to happen every month.

[00:06:34]Okay? From the time someone starts menration, >> they're supposed to have regular cycles until they reach a point of menopause.

[00:06:41]>> Yeah. Menopause. Menopause.

[00:06:43]average why they don't have because someone was telling me menopause they not have particular age these days. So there's an average age of about 50 50 to about 55.

[00:06:53]>> Okay.

[00:06:54]>> But most women tend to follow the trend of their mothers. Mama to say menopause at 48. The higher chances that >> menopause can come at 48.

[00:07:03]>> There's even there are people even getting who get into what we call early menopause at 45. You get it?

[00:07:08]>> Wow.

[00:07:09]>> Then there are those who go into what we call premature uh ovarian failure or really premature menopause. Those below 40.

[00:07:17]>> Yeah. You can get someone less than 14.

[00:07:19]Menopause literally. Okay.

[00:07:33]In fact, if you take 12 months period >> there then we take 6 months you still you haven't yet you have to reach 12 months then we say that person is in menopause >> and by by the time you reach men you see women are born with all the eggs they will ever need. In fact, those eggs are formed when that girl child is in the womb about 5 months.

[00:08:01]>> So when they give birth to them, those eggs keep on reducing until >> So when you no longer have eggs, then there's no egg that can be produced.

[00:08:12]There's no way you can go into your period.

[00:08:16]So family planning tends to follow a circle in women.

[00:08:21]There are basically two broad categories of family planning.

[00:08:26]The ones we call hormonal family planning methods.

[00:08:30]>> Then we have what we call non hormonal family planning methods.

[00:08:35]Hormones are the ones that target the menstrual cycle.

[00:08:40]>> The the most important thing about the menstrual cycle is stopping ovulation.

[00:08:46]You know what ovulation is?

[00:08:48]>> Yeah.

[00:08:55]>> [laughter] [laughter] >> I think something like that.

[00:09:02]>> When the egg is released that is called the process of ovulation.

[00:09:07]>> So the the hormonal family planning methods work by preventing that process from happening. M.

[00:09:15]>> So if the woman cannot release an egg, >> even if you have intercourse 20 times, they will not get pregnant.

[00:09:23]>> Okay. The the eggs are there, but they not being they're not released.

[00:09:26]>> They're being doant.

[00:09:27]>> They they're being kept in their store in the ovary. They cannot leave the store to go and meet with the sperms outside.

[00:09:35]>> Doesn't that have side effects?

[00:09:37]>> It's a good question. One, the the the when you use these family planning methods, the hormonal family planning method, for example, they include things like pills, pills that women must take daily.

[00:09:50]>> Daily >> daily.

[00:09:52]>> Ah, >> and when you take them daily, they effectively prevent you from ovulating.

[00:09:58]>> If you can't use pills, they're injections every 3 months.

[00:10:02]>> Okay.

[00:10:04]>> Press is in that category. You know these things? Yes, of course.

[00:10:08]>> Very good. [laughter] S every 3 months.

[00:10:16]>> Every 3 months.

[00:10:19]>> Very good.

[00:10:20]>> Free of charge of the health centers, government health center.

[00:10:22]>> So cyan press is is one of those there's what we call depot the cyan press but of every 3 months.

[00:10:30]>> Yeah.

[00:10:30]>> And if you get it effectively, you should not be able to ovulate. You should not be able to conceive. Then the third one are the implants.

[00:10:41]That one is non hormonal.

[00:10:44]That's a coil.

[00:10:45]>> The car for down is IUD.

[00:10:46]>> Is a coil. Yes.

[00:10:48]>> Coil.

[00:10:49]>> Okay.

[00:10:49]>> We shall go there.

[00:10:51]>> So the hormonal methods can be pills, can be uh injections or can be implants.

[00:10:58]>> Yeah.

[00:10:58]>> These implants you can when you put it here you can leave it for 3 years or you can leave it for 5 years. But we have had people who say they have that cine and still get pregnant. Now I must I think this is a disclaimer. There is no family planning that is 100%.

[00:11:13]>> The hormones work they're about 99.8% effective.

[00:11:18]>> It means that if you use it the chance of you getting pregnant is almost impossible.

[00:11:25]>> But not totally not totally impossible but almost >> almost.

[00:11:30]>> So there's no family planning. So even even the hormones that you use whatever planning that you use it is not entirely 100%. Even the vasecto is >> so so >> even the tubo cutting tell 100%. Cuz we've seen people have cut their tubes and they've conceived after the tubes have reconnected.

[00:11:50]>> So if a guy comes with hot spans they can break that cut.

[00:11:54]>> Yeah. It's not hot sp okay with a lot of force. [laughter] The force is in the sperms or in the act.

[00:12:04]The act of releasing them comes with a lot of force.

[00:12:14][laughter] [laughter] Not really. So there are things that make the family planning less effective.

[00:12:27]For example, if you're taking certain medications for let's say for people who are HIV positive, >> the the drugs for HIV tend to speed up the breakdown of the family planning.

[00:12:38]>> So if you're taking pills or if you're getting these injections and you're on certain drugs, the HIV drugs for example, we tell you you may have to come earlier than the time >> you get it. If you delay, you find that the drug is broken down quickly and then you'll be put at risk, >> okay, >> of of being exposed to the family plan.

[00:12:56]I mean of being exposed to the pregnancy. So those are the hormonal methods. Nina non hormonal methods.

[00:13:03]>> Non hormonal methods >> work by making sure that this sperm and the egg should never meet.

[00:13:12]>> The woman will continue producing her eggs. The husband will have his sperms but the two should never meet. For example, condoms, >> both male and female condoms. Okay. So when you use a condom the sperms are held in one place unless of course if the condom busts >> okay even the condoms are not 100% you they can bust size matters you get the the force itself the if it has expired >> the lubrication >> lubrication you get it so all those things can actually affect how effective this family planning methods can can be the second non hormonal method are the the the IUDs the intrautrine devices or The coil.

[00:13:53]>> The coil works by making sure because the coil is put.

[00:13:59]Let me see if I have a my iPad. Do you have a paper? Can I have a paper and a I have a pen. This plain paper.

[00:14:08]>> You get from >> So you have seen the drawing of the reproductive system. Yawa.

[00:14:22]Yeah.

[00:14:22]>> And for science.

[00:14:24]>> Mhm.

[00:14:26]>> So you've seen something like this.

[00:14:28]>> Mhm.

[00:14:30]>> Where this is the ovary, you know, fallopian tube.

[00:14:35]>> Tube, >> you know, in uterus. Then this is a vagina somewhere here. The IUD.

[00:14:40][laughter] Focus. Focus.

[00:14:43]>> Let's Let's go ahead.

[00:14:45]>> Yes. Yes. The IUD is placed in the uterus one1 in the upper part of the uterus.

[00:15:00]Okay. I think we have some IUD. We may may get some shot. But the IUD is placed up in the so when the sperms enter the IUD have got two types. There is a type which which contains copper what you call the copper IUD.

[00:15:22]>> Your copper IUD tell you hormonal that one works by making sure that that copper destroys the sperms. The sperms cannot go past this point. When the sperms reach near the IUD, they get slowed down >> by the copper.

[00:15:38]>> By the copper >> and they eventually get destroyed.

[00:15:40]>> Yes, they get destroyed.

[00:15:41]>> Yeah.

[00:15:42]>> So the remember the egg is waiting for the sperms tubes.

[00:15:53]>> So the copper iod is non hormonal. It works by making sure the sperms are destroyed. They cannot reach into the fallopian tube. Okay. So the egg the egg can only survive for 24 hours after it has been ovulated. So if it is not fertilized the egg dies. So that is there's also a hormonal IUD for it. It contains hormones but it also works primarily by making sure that the mucus is thick. The sperms can struggle to reach the the egg swim through and most of those sperms get to die. So those are ideally the the non hormonal contra condoms and IUD. There are also others. They are what we call uh the cups, cervical cups >> where you just try to cover the cervix.

[00:16:38]But some of these methods are not really uh they're not so common in our market.

[00:16:42]>> Okay. Yeah. Some of those are not common in our market.

[00:16:45]>> But we have had anyways emergency pills. Yes. So emergency pills are as the word says emergency.

[00:16:58]>> Emergency pills work by making sure that they postponed ovulation. They push ovulation which is different from the routine pills that you take. The routine pills make sure you cannot ovulate. M is they if you if you're going to ovulate in the next 3 days they sort of push that date for ovulation to allow the sperms to die before fertilization takes place.

[00:17:26]>> Now emergency pills have a problem.

[00:17:29]>> Why? Because if you have started the process of ovulation, ovulation normally takes >> if you have sex during the time of ovulation, those emergency pills >> won't work.

[00:17:46]>> Won't work.

[00:17:47]>> Hey, >> so it's very important when you're going to use emergency pills, >> it's okay. It's very important when you're going to use emergency pills to know if you are ovulating or not >> because if you take if you have sex the day before ovulation already the process has started >> because ovelation takes 2 days. So on the app most most apps have a dates they will say this is ovelation date just know 48 hours before ovelation if you take those pills there are higher chances that those pills will not work.

[00:18:20]>> That's why people are getting it wrong.

[00:18:22]Many people they and many people use emergency pills three four times in a what >> in a week >> in a week in a month.

[00:18:29]>> So it's no longer emergency. [laughter] >> And yet the word is emergency. You only need to use it emergency. [laughter] >> So when you do that you disorganize your cycle.

[00:18:41]>> When you disorganize your cycle you do not know the day you're going to ovulate.

[00:18:44]>> Yeah. So such a person who is using emergency pills more than once or twice in in a week or in a month should get a better family planning method which is more reliable. That's where most people are getting it wrong. Someone uses emergency pills today after 3 days using another emergency pill but already the ovelation day was pushed >> was pushed >> and if if if it the process has started even if you take it again it's not going to work.

[00:19:08]>> So you end up with a pregnancy. Would you advise younger girls 18, 19, 20 around 25 to use family planning especially when they don't have children?

[00:19:18]>> Yes.

[00:19:20]>> Doesn't it hinder them in the future?

[00:19:22]>> No. So family planning does not affect your fertility. It doesn't.

[00:19:26]>> Now of course when you use the hormonal family planning methods depending on how long you've used them sometimes you your system must reset itself.

[00:19:34]If you're using these hormonal methods, they are going to disorganize the normal menstrual cycle.

[00:19:40]So if you stop using them, it takes some time for your system. Some people immediately conceive after they've stopped. Others may take 2, 3 months, 4 months, 6 months, but it does not mean that you're going to become impotent.

[00:19:53]You have used the family planning methods. So young girls out there 16 uh 17 18 and you know this these days it's actually so so serious that people are beginning sexual intercourse as early as 15 years 14 years.

[00:20:07]>> Okay. And the problem is that many people are not aware of what to what to use.

[00:20:12]>> So you find that people out there they using emergency pills until they conceive then they have to struggle with abortions and all that. You get it? You rather actually have if [clears throat] you if you go to the US and in some of these countries those those girls are taught about contracept contraceptive methods as early as possible and they start using them early >> so that they don't yeah they avoid that because here we have a problem don't talk about those things and the kid at 18 is already having >> two children so prevention >> prevention is better than the cure [laughter] now there's thing I've heard there are people I've heard they are too fatile yes I I have met some of those women that they have used hormones they have conceived they have used non hormonal IUD and they have conceived yes I've met some of those there are people who really and you Family planning is not how can I say >> is not one sizefits all.

[00:21:25]>> It's not that if I've used an IUD for me I mean everyone else should use an IUD.

[00:21:29]No there are people who use IUDs and either they get problems what infections all the time after they use an IUD.

[00:21:35]There are those who get pain when they're using an IUD. You get it? So sometimes it's very important to have a discussion and that's where people get it wrong before getting a family planning method speak with tell them your medical history.

[00:21:52]>> For example people who have history of pressure if you have history of pressure and it's not controlled you don't we don't advise you to use hormones. If you have history of getting clothes, you've ever got a clo >> if you use a hormonal method, it's going to worsen your chance of getting a clo.

[00:22:09]>> So, so people should they should not just say I'm going to do family planning. They need to come to serious hospital.

[00:22:15]>> You need to go to hospital >> and talk to doctors >> and talk to doctors or talk to family planning experts because there are midwives and nurses who have been trained in giving family planning methods.

[00:22:24]>> Yes, they're there. But >> no, there are midwives and nurses who through programs and projects we have because we know you can't get doctors in every corner of the country. But if you have the nurse there whom you've trained on how to give family planning, that person they can be effective. So don't just go to a place and say I want this family planning. Sit with the doctor and say if I am to use this family planning, what are >> the risks of using this family planning?

[00:22:49]What are the benefits of using this family planning?

[00:22:51]>> I have this history in pressure. I got a stroke before. Okay, in my family people are getting clots. Should I use hormonal family planning methods? I am on these medications maybe pressure for HIV and all that. Which family planning is best suited for me?

[00:23:08]You get it? Otherwise people just go to the pharmacy and or to and they just give them a family planning then when they get side effects of this family planning because some family plannings can make you to bleed a lot.

[00:23:21]>> The hormonal methods for example.

[00:23:24]having sat down with you this family planning can cause A B C D your mind will be more prepared and ready for the effects of using that family planning.

[00:23:44]>> Okay. Now, um, moving into the male side, >> there's a myth I also want you to break down for me. Is it true women get horn in menopause? [laughter] >> Like like they want it now more than here when they are >> so the the sexual the sexuality or the sexual desire of women has got picss.

[00:24:10]For example, most women tend to pick with sexual desire when they're ovulating.

[00:24:18]>> Okay? Because during that time when the egg has been released, the libido tends to be very high and the woman tends to want to have intercourse. It's just an act of nature. Yeah. Reproduction must take place. The egg has been released.

[00:24:33]>> Where is the nearest man?

[00:24:35]>> Okay.

[00:24:37]>> Yes. So you when a woman is is ovulating the the the li the okay the horn >> is high >> it's very high >> now that transitions when you go into menopause because in menopause you you no longer have eggs you're no longer ovulating okay so ideally the desire for a woman to have intercourse tends to drop >> okay but it it's not entirely true that they will never want to have sex. No, they will actually still want to have sex. The other challenge that they face is that when they reach menopause, some women undergo what we call uh atrophic changes. In simple terms, they undergo changes around the reproductive area. Some of them lubrication reduces.

[00:25:26]Okay. Because of menopause, the hormone that is necessary, the estrogen is not is low during menopause. M >> so vaginal lubrication is less. They end up having a bit of tightness around the vagina. They end up feeling pain during intercourse. So such things can reduce a woman's desire.

[00:25:47]>> Okay? Not because she really does not want to have sex, but because every time she's having intercourse, she's feeling pain, she's not well lubricated and all that. So she might as well just opt to have less of the sex.

[00:25:58]>> So the the issue of getting hornia is not entirely true.

[00:26:01]>> It's not entirely true. And actually >> just depends on the person.

[00:26:03]>> Depends on the person. And you know we actually have medications. There are creams that we use estrogen creams that we give these women >> to be passing there >> to be passing there. And they don't have to pass it dur before sex. No, they can pass it daily for some time and you realize that the lubrication improves >> randomly. [laughter] That's good. Uh you know I like these conversations because they dispel so many now because now they used to tell us when women get older >> they crave >> that is >> so now I understand it's just about the person a particular person and >> thank you very much people She told us for her no contraceptive works on her.

[00:27:03]>> She she's so so fatile. So such people the men need to opt for maybe the other permanent methods. One permanent methods the tubiligation for women where we actually tie the tubes >> and then we have vasectomy for for the men where we we men also have tubes. We also have we can also tie these tubes.

[00:27:22]So those ones are a bit much better.

[00:27:25]>> But the thing is that >> sometimes >> people get tubation or tie the tubes especially if they're young people.

[00:27:34]>> There's a there's a degree of regret >> eventually because yeah that's where I was coming.

[00:27:39]>> For the men I think the the family planning method for the men >> is withdraw family planning method.

[00:27:45]>> It is one of the family planning methods in in what we call non hormonal methods.

[00:27:49]So is it effective?

[00:27:50]>> It is not effective. They effective. But I've also I've met I've met men who have perfected the art of withdraw when they hold >> when when they feel that part.

[00:28:07]>> So withdrawal first withdrawal is what it falls under what we call uh I think okay fatility awareness meth. So there are methods that just rely on a knowledge about someone's cycle. For example, safe days.

[00:28:24]>> Okay. There are people who will have sex during the safe days. When they reach the unsafe days, they abstain.

[00:28:33]Condoms and any other contraceptive meth especially the condoms. Then when they out of the safe days, I mean out of the fatile days, they go back to having unprotected.

[00:28:42]>> Fat days like how many? So the fatile days varies per person.

[00:28:48]>> Okay. But on average they're about seven to about 10 days.

[00:28:52]>> Fatile days. Yes.

[00:28:53]>> So seven days. 7 to 10 days if someone is not banging.

[00:28:57]>> Oh seven when they in their pe.

[00:29:02]>> So literally that is 17 days >> out of uh 30 >> out of 28 30. Mhm. So a man is literally left with >> 13 >> 13 days.

[00:29:16]>> Oh wow.

[00:29:18]>> It sounds weird.

[00:29:20][laughter] >> I was going to ask you.

[00:29:22]>> 13 days. Wow. The 13 days a few.

[00:29:28]I don't know. [laughter] I'm just thinking when if you're trying to avoid getting pregnant and you have to throw your man chow for only 13 days.

[00:29:38]No. But you see during this during the fatile window you can use condoms.

[00:29:44]>> Yeah but but people don't want to use condoms. You know the things they say about >> that what >> they want skin to skin >> but there are more this there are better condoms that give you the feeling of skin to skin.

[00:29:55]>> Yeah they give you the feeling they it's not actually you understand. [laughter] So now you get it.

[00:30:04]>> Okay. Um so you are still telling us um there's withdrawal. Yes. So withdrawal is not effective. In fact in terms of effectiveness I think the percent is about 60%. You know like most of these family planning they are 99 98 99 withdrawal is about 60 >> effective and withdrawal requires a lot of discipline.

[00:30:25]>> Yeah.

[00:30:25]>> Discipline from both partners.

[00:30:28]Number three is that just before you withdraw, there are already sperms that have escaped.

[00:30:37]>> Yeah.

[00:30:37]>> The earlier one, >> those ones, they have already taken off.

[00:30:42]So, by the time you think you're withdrawing and some of some people want to try themselves to go an extra mile before they withdraw, too late.

[00:30:55]By the time you withdraw the guys have already gone have taken off. So for you think you've withdrawn but you have sent a few kasus in front.

[00:31:03]>> Yeah.

[00:31:04]>> And those ones will do the necessary.

[00:31:06]>> They already enrolled.

[00:31:09][laughter] >> So that's why withdrawal is very it's one of those methods that it's not reliable. But again like I said I've seen couples who will tell you I have five children but I space them every two years. And you ask them what contraception what what method are you using and they will tell you for us we withdraw and the wife will tell you we are disciplined when he's about I tell him they just do it for likes >> no they're disciplined unlike some people who are not disciplined the time when they're supposed to withdraw that is the time they're now doing other things or some some women when you want to withdraw they hold you the hands and legs and say you're not going anywhere.

[00:31:53]They want to feel the magma.

[00:31:58][laughter] They said it feels like an a mountain is erupting.

[00:32:07][laughter] [sighs and gasps] And that's when people say hail Mary. [laughter] >> So, so, so, so, um, for men, I think we have only withdraw. And then maybe this one they call it >> vasectomy.

[00:32:20]>> The vasectomy. And we have condoms.

[00:32:22]>> Yeah, the condoms.

[00:32:23]>> Condoms work. I don't know why you don't look down those condoms.

[00:32:26]>> The problem we have these days, people just test the blood.

[00:32:29]>> But do you know >> they like man that is even very unreliable. If you test blood of someone now, what if they undergoing the the window period?

[00:32:39]>> Why these days people fear pregnancy more than HIV? Yes, >> I know. Anyway, it is what it is. But I think men have not really embraced family planning a lot. Uh because uh >> why why why do you think men have >> no I think it's for the woman because well the woman is the one receiving that is one and of course I think the natural order the man is you know those things >> yeah but then vasectomy >> with the way DNA is happening these days. So what happens after you do vasectomy and 10 15 years later they tell you >> those are not your kids. So would you suggest the person does DNA before >> clearly [laughter] but you know most men don't have the role of of doing these days they're telling people do DNA they're like [laughter] but but that is how our grandparents used to behave they knew that someone is raising their child somewhere even they know that this child doesn't look like me but it is okay >> let me do my But >> so for you, you're not okay with DNA.

[00:34:03]>> No, for me, I think that if you trust the person, >> okay, >> trust is very expensive these days.

[00:34:10]>> I you see anyway right now what is prevailing, it would really make more sense for someone to get DNA. But I I think who is a father? A father is someone who who may not necessarily have been father the one who takes care. The one who does I cannot stay if you are the one who raised me again. You will be yes we shall say okay yeah out of courtesy but my father will always be my father.

[00:34:47]Couples who are conceiving via IVF and they're getting donor sperms and donor eggs >> are in those fathers and mothers to those children.

[00:34:56]>> The that's the mother not the father.

[00:34:59]>> No >> yes like the man. No, the the husband >> when when when the you know actually when the time we talk about male male infertility we will talk about that but there are men who over 50% of couples that cannot conceive men are responsible men are having poor quality sperms. Men are having sperms that can't swim >> that to the point that we have to suggest for them to get donor sperms from another person >> from another man.

[00:35:31]>> Yes.

[00:35:32]>> You don't be the father. No, but the owner of the sperms is the father.

[00:35:35]>> No, but you see, you are the one who has facilitated the IVF. You are the one who has taken care of. You don't own the sperms.

[00:35:44]>> You see the only the difference with that is one that one, you do it intentionally. You aware.

[00:35:50]>> Yes, >> that is one.

[00:35:52]>> Two, you [clears throat] don't know who the father is.

[00:35:54]>> True. But does that mean that you're not the father of that child?

[00:35:57]>> Yeah. You are the father.

[00:36:01]You're not.

[00:36:02]Yeah. And we run around science.

[00:36:04]>> No, that's the honest truth.

[00:36:07]>> Science is trying to find solutions for some of these men, even women.

[00:36:11]>> It is. But the natural order is what may I believe in the natural order on certain things.

[00:36:21]>> The only thing is now DNA. There's another man who knows.

[00:36:27]Okay, maybe he doesn't know but there's you know >> but here you're very well aware nobody is going to wake up one day to claim this child >> because the confidentiality stuff and you know all of that those things and then it's your own decision you have made it with your wife >> so anyway it brings in two things one it as a child let me ask there are children who are being raised by men >> who are not their biological fathers >> but they consider them their fathers >> they consider them >> yes Good. But there may not be. So in other words, we need to really to this word father. It has to be a broader word to encompass all these. It cannot just be restricted to genetics.

[00:37:10]>> It has to because genetics is what makes you.

[00:37:13]>> Yes. Genetics.

[00:37:13]>> But then the thing is me I appreciate the men who are doing these things.

[00:37:18]>> And actually I have mad respect for them because today most people like that.

[00:37:23]There are guys after maybe your father who take on on kids after the father disappears >> you know I have mad respect for them and I actually encourage them to go on but me what I move along most >> so you you don't call that person father to those children >> no he's not their father this one is out of courtesy what you will say this is my papa But your father is there even when you don't want to talk to him. The reality is what you and and and and by the way >> for me that is what bothers me the most especially with women. Um I've seen lots of women who struggle with kids.

[00:38:21]you get another guy raises this kid blah blah blah then out of the blue one day a guy is 20 years he shows up >> so I don't know from all those life struggles and it's something that really bothers me by the way a lot >> like you hustle with your kid >> what are the circumstances know there are some men who will tell the woman I do not want anything to do with this child >> and then they appear 20 years later >> so how do we repair this woman because these are things money cannot even buy.

[00:38:52]True.

[00:38:52]>> You understand?

[00:38:53]>> But also now such a such a child, imagine you are such a child that that that so-called father did not want anything to do with you or even told your mother to terminate the pregnancy and for some reason she kept you.

[00:39:03]>> But you know you know the issues that deal with blood [laughter] >> somehow especially when your pups shows up.

[00:39:10]These all become stories.

[00:39:13]Sometimes money is not everything. No, but I'm saying like when your pups shows up, not every day, but I'm saying there there's when your pups shows up with money.

[00:39:23]>> There are people >> and it's like man times where I had those days. There's this apartment, you manage it.

[00:39:33][laughter] And that's where and that's where actually where most men who raise these kids regret because then one day the kid tells you man I'm talking to my dad and you're like wow where was your dad you know that's >> very very funny that's that's a it's a tough discussion >> and it's a discussion that of course puts fatherhood into balance but I think it it takes more than just genetics to be a father yes genetics plays plays a key role in fact genetics is a foundation of fatherhood >> it's a foundation but then we have seen fathers who are not present. You said fathers who are not that fathers who are actually alive >> and they have done little for their children you realize that you become somebody in life >> but that has not done anything he's a drunkard in the village so I think we are just selective because if you if you get a successful >> father then things changed but he's not successful >> so and I and I actually advise men as you take on these roles just count it as your CSR at the world that one day as your account with God you telling man I was I was a bad guy but at least I took care of someone [laughter] >> for for 20 years is that reason enough for you yeah because with the with the way the world is you you you may not expect to get rewarded >> true yeah >> true but I think when you do that you you you you are not expecting anything and I think actually most fathers do that you think fathers invest thinking that you're going to repay them >> it is mostly the mothers >> who are But most fathers most fathers even don't don't get any praise and you realize like and anyway there's a lot that comes with fatherhood. Exactly.

[00:41:17]>> Yeah. But for us in in the world of fertility in the world of IVF and all that we get such couples where the man cannot actually produce the sperms and we need to use a donor sperm or we have to use sperms.

[00:41:31]>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We actually in the IVF centers that we work >> no the the sperm donation we only pay you about 150 to 200,000 >> I thought every day you you're producing sperms you have excess sperms >> yeah but >> and you produce them in millions >> I can't just be throwing them around like that >> you might as well get 150k or 200k from >> like dailyh >> like daily >> what you daily every time you donate >> yeah I Withdraw every day. I like I say I come I withdraw every day. Are you producing like a 150?

[00:42:08]>> Yes. If you give us sperms daily, we will be able to give you the 150.

[00:42:21]Okay.

[00:42:23]15. And if you have good good sperms and and your sperms are helping families to conceive and have children, your rate card can go up. You can be like >> money goes up.

[00:42:33]>> Even egg donation for example. Egg donation of course for it it's a bit more rewarding. It's about 1 million.

[00:42:38]Yeah. It's about 1 million women.

[00:42:41]>> Yeah.

[00:42:42]>> Then you fuse with >> the sperms.

[00:42:44]>> Then the kid comes.

[00:42:45]>> Wow.

[00:42:46]>> So those ones we pay them about 1 million. 1 >> if if you have good eggs.

[00:42:52]>> So let me see.

[00:42:54]You may get about 2 million >> if I donate. Madame donate. [laughter] >> So a month we can make our car 3.

[00:43:03]>> Yeah. If it's no for the women is just once in a month.

[00:43:06]>> Once a month. Okay. That's 1.5. Mhm.

[00:43:18]>> So you can make the money actually.

[00:43:21][laughter] >> Yes, you can make some money. Anyway, so um that's been family planning.

[00:43:32]>> Yeah. Now for men, there are newer family planning methods that are still being developed. For example, there are injections that are being de for a man like >> Yes.

[00:43:43]>> Every 8 weeks you get an injection.

[00:43:45]There are there are injections that we we we put to block the tubes that are also being developed.

[00:43:53]So that's and and that and that tubalo blockage can take about one year after which it it dissolves and then you you are able to function again. I mean you're able to release viable sperms.

[00:44:05]There are patches that you get and you put on your arm and then the hormone goes in and yeah but all these are they all risky. They're not risky, Kasuku. But don't you see the risk women go through when they're when they're getting this family planning?

[00:44:21]What makes you think that for them they can endure the side effects than the men?

[00:44:25]>> Not us.

[00:44:28]Anyway, because for me initially when I heard of these men, I thought like they don't come. No, they do. They actually cutting doing a vasectomy everything stays functional. It's just that you'll be firing blanks.

[00:44:46]>> Oh, >> you'll actually even produce what we call seminal fluid. But in that fluid sperms because we have we have blocked off the connection of >> the testes the sperms to to come out.

[00:45:01]>> I I think that's the most important thing you need to begin telling men because men >> the only time they feel like H this has happened is when they come.

[00:45:10]>> No they they release they release freed they actually get an orgasm they come but that's exact orgasm.

[00:45:17]>> Yes it's just empty you are just firing blanks.

[00:45:21]So it is very effective. You stay with your morning erection, your night erection, all those system operates.

[00:45:32][laughter] >> I don't know. Vasectomy sounds weird in my mind but >> no it is that there are women who have undergone a lot of severe effects from contraceptives that the the only right option is for the man to get a vase or or to break up with the manh before you go to break up get the context why could the man take [laughter] You need to encourage men to get [laughter] you. [laughter] >> Yeah. You see that is a very simple procedure. 15 30 minutes you're done in not even in theater in in in a in a in what you call a procedure room.

[00:46:21]>> These are very simple procedures.

[00:46:23]>> Okay.

[00:46:23]>> Yeah. If you think you've reached your family size, you have four children, you're tired of planting children all over the the city, you get your vasectomy. But when you get a vasectomy, inform your wife about it. Do >> otherwise you will continue. [laughter] That has been Dr. Emmanuel.

[00:46:43]>> Yes.

[00:46:44]>> From TMR, Golden Living Specialized Hospital.

[00:46:54]TMR Golden Living Specialized Hospital.

[00:46:57]It's always a pleasure.

[00:46:58]>> Thank you >> having you and I hope uh guys you've picked those who want to do some of these things.

[00:47:04]>> These things are here. So you can always come around the movie.

[00:47:08]>> Uh for me I'll stick with the condoms.

[00:47:13]>> Yes. And and withdraw. Ah we enjoy kind of this lifetime but uh you can count those 13 days.

[00:47:23]>> Yes >> 13 days there are people who tell us they are masters that withdraw but now they have like eight [laughter] my brother exactly what there's a guy who told us getting pregnant does not need an hour.

[00:47:41]>> It's just a snap of the finger. So, [laughter] so but anyway, like we said, you can download the TMR Gordon Living app.

[00:47:54]>> Uh, drop those questions there. You can uh go to these videos. Actually, TMR also has a >> Tik Tok page. I've seen it. TMR hospital. I've seen they have uh No, I've seen their YouTube.

[00:48:09]>> You guys have a YouTube channel?

[00:48:10]>> No, we have we have a YouTube channel.

[00:48:12]You can go. But you also have a YouTube channel.

[00:48:14]>> Yes. Yes, I do have a YouTube channel.

[00:48:16]Uh, >> it's called Lad Emanuel 256 or Dr. Lad Emanuel. That's just the name.

[00:48:22]>> Yeah. So, you can go there. There's a lot of talks that I give about uh family planning, pregnancy and all that.

[00:48:29]Sometimes you putting something on Google, you find it hard to read through everything. But when you hear someone explain things like we have done today, you able to pick one or two things.

[00:48:39]Yeah. Yeah. So, >> K. Thank you.

[00:48:43]>> Pleasure.

[00:48:43]>> We shall meet again. [laughter] >> Bye.

[00:49:09]The views expressed on Kasuku Live do not reflect those of the host, producers, or management. They are solely of individuals providing them and do not represent or reflect the official policy or position of this YouTube channel.

[00:49:30][laughter] >> [screaming] [laughter] >> That's it.

[00:50:00]>> [music] [music] [music] [music]