"She'll Use It Against You!" Why Men Don't Open Up To Women with @AlisonArmstrongVideos

Added: 2026-06-02

[00:00:00]Men cannot reveal anything that they believe will be used against them.

[00:00:07]>> Welcome to another episode of Ask a Brother podcast. I'm your host, Jeff St. James, and we're going to have a whole host of different people from different backgrounds coming in because it really is about building a community [music] of like-minded people that's just open to listening and hearing from other perspectives. The revolution is going to be because [music] of us.

[00:00:28]I made a controversial statement when I first first came out, you know, publicly last year where I said I don't know that women are necessarily loyal to men. I think when I said I think that they're actually loyal to their feelings about men.

[00:00:43]And people say, "How could you say that?" And this this and that. And I was like, "Well, I mean, women aren't leaving happy relationships.

[00:00:52]You know, they're not they're not divorcing happy situations.

[00:00:56]I said, "But when their feelings change?" And I was like, "And do you assume that men that show up every day and do what they're supposed to do, their feelings don't fluctuate?"

[00:01:04]Mhm. Of course they do. So, that was my initial argument, which is like I think women are just a little bit more loyal.

[00:01:11]And but I will give the caveat with this. I could see a scenario where we could argue that men may be more loyal to their lust at times. Um but the data's starting to reflect and show that cheating numbers are starting to look pretty even now between the sexes. So, I don't even know if I could say that as much anymore.

[00:01:28]Um but I will >> say something about it? Yeah.

[00:01:33]Oh, boy. Okay.

[00:01:35]Loyal to their lust.

[00:01:37]Procreate just is number one.

[00:01:41]It is number one. It's why it It's why it cycles around your brain so fast. I It asserts why virtually every species on the planet that has a mouth it also has It's elimination >> [laughter] >> procedures involve the genitals.

[00:02:04]Why would that make sense? To stimulate them several times a day so we don't forget to make babies.

[00:02:12]>> [laughter] >> Like we're we are we are built to procreate.

[00:02:18]And it's one of the It's one of the most hopeless things that women take personally.

[00:02:26]And it's it's it's one of the things that first showed up in in Keys to the Kingdom. Mhm. That that how literal men are and and when you say she caught my eye or um she turned my head.

[00:02:42]That is a precise statement. It was involuntary. He did not decide, "I'm going to watch her to the limits of my vision." [laughter] He did not decide that. She turned his head.

[00:02:59]And to feel disrespected by that, to feel threatened by that it it's such a waste of energy. In instead of it's not disrespect, it's just instinct and we wouldn't have humans if it weren't for that.

[00:03:18]And and the respect he shows is how quickly he turns his head back.

[00:03:23]>> [laughter] >> Yeah. Yeah, you are about to say That's the respect.

[00:03:27]Listen ladies, listen ladies, you better listen ladies here. The it the respect is how quickly he turns his head back.

[00:03:33]That is it versus him lying to you and saying he don't see it.

[00:03:37]Cuz that that's it. I love that.

[00:03:39]>> Yes. Yes. And then if he turns his head back, the look on your face is going to determine what happens next.

[00:03:47]>> [laughter] >> Because women women and pissed off that men won't apologize.

[00:03:55]But we have shown you nearly 100% of the time that your apology will be part of the next attack.

[00:04:07]We will use your apology. We We will recycle your apology with pride at our efficiency of using the same admission of guilt >> [laughter] >> over and over and over again.

[00:04:25]And And this is why you guys only That only has to happen a couple of times and notice that it's happening with women starting with your mom that you just don't apologize anymore because because protect trumps provide. Provide an apology, protect oneself.

[00:04:48]You can't provide an apology that you know is going to be used against you.

[00:04:52]You can't reveal anything. Instinct The instinct to protect has men locked down.

[00:04:58]It has women locked down, too. And I'll come back to that loyalty thing. Mhm.

[00:05:03]Men cannot reveal anything that they believe will be used against them, believe it could be used against them, or someone has proven they will use it against them.

[00:05:19]And this is how I learned so much about men.

[00:05:21]>> [laughter] >> Mhm.

[00:05:23]I spend a lot of time on airplanes to get to the places to teach women about men.

[00:05:27]And the men sitting next to me they'd start to talk.

[00:05:32]And I'd keep listening and they'd keep talking and then they'd say, "My wife doesn't even know this about me."

[00:05:37]And I'd know exactly why she didn't know.

[00:05:40]But I didn't know his name. I didn't know the name of his children. I did I children. I didn't know his ultimate destination. He was certain I couldn't hurt him.

[00:05:49]So, he gave me everything. And this is I mean, this has happened with teenage men. This has happened with elders and everything in between. Just handed to me because I they knew I couldn't hurt them.

[00:06:05]Now, this is why political staff members witness so many things and then and then publish >> [laughter] >> hurtful things, but the big powerful politician were sure they couldn't hurt them.

[00:06:18]Big mistake, right? Mhm.

[00:06:20]On the other hand, if you wanted to contrast, women do their darndest to only reveal what they think will be found attractive by that person.

[00:06:34]Mhm.

[00:06:37]Including our real reactions.

[00:06:43]Yeah.

[00:06:44]Yeah. Including our truths. Including our truths. If we don't think our truth will be attractive to you because in our our version of procreate them, protect them, provide, we're so much smaller and weaker than men.

[00:07:04]Mhm. So much. Like unbelievable difference in strength given by testosterone.

[00:07:11]And I mean, honestly, I've had so many lifetimes as a man, I am still astonished at the weakness of this little white lady's body.

[00:07:22]>> [laughter] >> She is so pale and so weak.

[00:07:28]>> [laughter] >> I asked I asked one of the board members of the International Black Summit, "Why was I born into this body?"

[00:07:37]>> [laughter] >> Listen, you know what?

[00:07:40]>> And I'm not I'm not kidding. Her, her eyes changed colors. Mhm. And she said, "We are born into that which we're meant to transform."

[00:07:49]Mhm. And then her eyes changed back.

[00:07:52]>> [laughter] >> I was like, "Oh golly, white women >> like she has some southern roots. She sound like she has some southern roots.

[00:07:58]>> She sound like she has some southern roots with that answer. That was a good bar.

[00:08:03]That was a [clears throat] good bar.

[00:08:05]We are born into that >> in Atlanta. Her name was Petal. Her name is Petal and this was in Atlanta. Some good southern roots. Yeah. So we are born into that which we are meant to transform. Oh my god. That's what she said.

[00:08:19]So here I am.

[00:08:28]>> [music]