Why Dating Shows Are a Humiliation Ritual

Added: 2026-05-22

[00:00:00]But, I got two things on it.

[00:00:02]I'm a younger and I got skill.

[00:00:07]>> [music] >> All right. Well, today I wanted to talk about why dating shows are a humiliation ritual. Dating shows like The Bachelor and Love Island are super popular here in the US. And honestly, you couldn't pay me to watch a bunch of guys juster max and compete against each other to get a cloud chasing broad to give them the rose. I remember my ex-girlfriend got me to watch episodes of Love Island and that show was so agonizing to watch that's been living in my head rent free months later. I can't imagine going on one of these shows and being put through the humiliating group dates or standing in front of a group of women and they decide if you're attractive enough and pop a balloon. Dating shows really show what happens when male loneliness gets sponsored by Netflix. In this video, we'll be watching clips from a few different dating shows and breaking it down. Are you a connoisseur, huh?

[00:00:50]Actually, it would be called an oenophile if you're a connoisseur of wine.

[00:00:53]Sorry. Sorry. Well, no. I don't I don't drink wine, man. I'm I'm I'm a college boy. I like to drink beer. I like to take shots, you know, like Oh, there's nothing nothing wrong with that. I mean, I No, I was in college, too, way back when and graduated everything. So. So, how old are you?

[00:01:05]Older than you. So, you're the old man of the group. Sweet. No, more like more experienced, sophisticated.

[00:01:11]>> So, this scene is really funny because really all four of these guys are like vying for the girl's attention. They're doing all sorts of juster maxing and and making subtle jabs towards each other.

[00:01:20]You know, the one guy said he he's a wine connoisseur and Craig chimes in and said, "Oh, you're actually you actually would be an oenophile." Like trying to like, you know, kind of belittle him a little bit and then, you know, the other guy who who really looks like Jim from American Pie. I I can't I can't get that image out of my head, but he pops up and he says, "Oh, you're the old man of the group." And you know, Craig comes back and says, "Oh, I'm very sophisticated and very you know, very wise." And like they're all really trying to compete hard for this girl and it's actually pretty interesting because this girl I don't I don't find this girl very attractive. I I she's I guess you could say she's like slightly cute. And all these guys are really competing hard for and this is you actually see this a lot in real life, too. Like you see it a lot when three or four guys are talking to the same girl at a bar or club and they're all like finding every little way to try to impress her and she's just like eating up all the attention. Craig, I thought he's a little bit too old to be doing this, but he's going a little bit of robbing the cradle here. So, what about now? Like what's your ideal girl now? Like what kind of girl that you want to date now?

[00:02:27]Whatever whatever girl I like, it doesn't really matter. I mean, I like sometimes different styles, different looks, even mother-daughter, sisters, you know, just any any kind of girl.

[00:02:38]>> mother-daughter? I have. [laughter] I have. I have. Yeah.

[00:02:40]>> Have you really? Did you hear that?

[00:02:42]So, my mom's really hot. I mean, if you met my mom, are you going to be like, "Oh, there's McKenzie's mom." you know?

[00:02:48]I mean, you going to try to hook up that, too? You know, a little healthy competition is not bad. Good job, [laughter] potatoes.

[00:02:54]So, when Craig says that he would like to date a mother and daughter, he's really setting himself up for the producers to paint him as this this creepy weirder older guy. And really producers love this kind of stuff because they do all the editing on the back end to make someone seem as creepy as possible. I think in this case, you know, he's the oldest out of these four guys that are competing for her and they're going to do whatever it takes to literally create a thumbnail that says creepy Craig. And that's going to be you know, that's up on YouTube for the longest time. So, I guarantee you every once in a while, like, you know, his friends and family and anyone who knows this guy probably bust on him a lot and they probably pull up that YouTube video and show it to them or they they send it in the group chats and stuff like that.

[00:03:38]Like a lot of guys, man, they get screwed over by by dating shows. They really get painted in a really bad light. And that honestly like affects their career, it affects their dating life outside of the show and it can be a real they can be a big headache. From the looks of McKenzie [music] and what she said about her mother, I would be more than willing to do a mother-daughter with McKenzie. Craig, if you want after this date, I can [music] give you my grandmother's number. She's old, moldy or what else, but I bet she's happy to prove you. How old are you? You never told us.

[00:04:09]Older than me, I never like specifically.

[00:04:11]>> enough to not be interested in skateboarding and video games and things like that. So, these guys are like subtly making fun of Craig for his age and they keep asking him how old he is.

[00:04:19]It's kind of a way for them to like joke on him in front of the girl and make her laugh. And I really think with Craig, I think the reason they're questioning his age and they think he's much older is because he has a receding hairline and he also has very thinning hair in the front and it kind of makes him look a lot older. And I think basically it's setting up this dynamic of, you know, three younger guys and one old guy competing for a younger chick. And it's just kind of a weird dynamic that's not playing in Craig's favor. I'm so excited. This is so much fun for me cuz I have this princess complex and it's the horse and the carriage ride thing and it's so nice. Kind of like [laughter] a like a fantasy thing for me, you know.

[00:04:59]Do you guys have any?

[00:05:01]I've lived out one of my fantasies before.

[00:05:04]What is it?

[00:05:05]>> uh due to old age. Experience experience my young So, Jim from American Pie is joking on Craig again for his age and the joke is actually working because the girl is actually laughing like ear to ear and she's like leaning in and you can tell she's much more attracted to Jim than than Craig. If you're witnessing this, you can already see what's about to go down. Honestly, I think it really comes down to Craig does look a lot older, you know, because of his, you know, receding hairline, thinning hair in the front. Jim looks a lot younger. He's a little bit better looking than Craig and she's more attracted to him and Craig comes off as very like awkward. And I think he's coming off as like trying to play like he's trying he's coming off very serious, whereas the the guy, Jim, he's just kind of being light-hearted and you know, joking around. I think you know, the combination of him looking a lot younger, being a little bit better looking and closer to her age, it's just he's got this in the bag on.

[00:05:57]>> It's my young friends.

[00:05:58]>> experience.

[00:05:59]>> Experience, yes. How about you, hot shot? What kind of fantasies do you bring out?

[00:06:03]I have tons of fantasies.

[00:06:04]>> Well, name one of them. They keep evolving. They change as time goes on.

[00:06:08]>> Well, I'd like to hear. But I got two things on him.

[00:06:11]I'm younger and I got skill.

[00:06:16]>> [music] [music] >> So, Jim from American Pie is just a complete savage. I mean, he just goes for it. He just kisses her. And >> [laughter] >> it's just like that's got to be so humiliating to be Craig. Like watching the guy you're competing against make out with the girl you're also trying to win over. And you're stuck on this like this ride where you like you're all of your legs are touching. You're all so close together. They're making out literally right next to you. And it's not like Craig can just jump off the other wagon while this is going on. So, he's like literally stuck there. Like that's got to be so freaking embarrassing and humiliating. And I honestly feel I feel bad for Craig. Like that's that's tough, man. Like if if you're at a party, like God forbid you're competing against another guy like this. Like you can just you know, walk off and call it an L. But he's literally like stuck on this ride until it's over. Like that's freaking brutal.

[00:07:22]>> [music] >> I don't want you to break a hip.

[00:07:26]I had to do this though, but Craig is forced to witness them making out for a long time, probably. He's sitting there.

[00:07:32]He's He's God knows what Craig's thinking. He's extremely embarrassed, extremely humiliated. And then the first thing he says is I don't want you to break a hip. Like that's so freaking savage, man. Like Jim's just Jim's just rubbing salt in the wound at this point and like just knocking Craig while he's down.

[00:07:50]Tory kissed [music] me for a long time.

[00:07:52]I wasn't expecting it, but it was pretty hot. Tory surprised me a little bit >> [music] >> by going for the kiss, but I attribute it to the alcohol. He was completely out of control of his own body. He probably doesn't even remember it. Now, I apologize that he swallowed your face, but if [laughter] you want a real kiss Do you really [clears throat] want sloppy seconds? Tory, do you want sloppy seconds?

[00:08:11]>> [laughter] >> Damn, this is even more brutal, man.

[00:08:13]Like this is like the kiss of death.

[00:08:15]Like not only did he witness, you know, Jim, his competitor, like making out with this girl for probably over a minute, now he goes for the kiss and gets turned down. Like he's even more humiliated at this point. He's like going through his head and he's just thinking like damn, this really [ __ ] sucks. Like this is really embarrassing and you know, the other guy is just, you know, Jim is just enjoying it, enjoying like, you know, Craig being like so humiliated.

[00:08:42]>> I think he'll take whatever he can get at this point. Full desperation.

[00:08:45]>> [laughter] >> Do you Do you want sloppy seconds? It won't be sloppy once you're over here.

[00:08:50][laughter] And unfortunately for Craig, the girl gives every excuse not to kiss him. She kind of jokingly says like, "Hey, you do You don't want sloppy seconds?" And she's just using that as an excuse to not kiss Craig. She's not attracted to him and she's just much more attracted to, you know, Jim from American Pie.

[00:09:08]>> [laughter] >> He got it first.

[00:09:18]Yeah, well, he >> [music] >> He He sneaked in there.

[00:09:19]>> before though.

[00:09:20]>> [singing] >> Yeah, he sneaked in there. He's drunk, so he can't control himself. So, Craig was already pushed in the lava by this girl and Jim. And now they make out a second time and they just like they're like pretty much dunking his head in the lava and not letting him breathe. Like this is just like so messed up on so many levels. And I can't imagine like being Craig in this moment and like seeing this all like transpire in real time. You also got to remember like they're in such close quarters with each other, like we're literally within like a few feet of each other. Their knees are touching. There's a cameraman right next to them with a big camera in the face. Craig knows that this is going to be all over TV. This might be on different like TV networks. All this stuff is going through his head and he's kind of really just trying to rationalize and seem calm. But all this stuff is like going through his head like a freaking tidal wave. And I think he's just trying to, you know, joke it off like, "Oh, he's drunk. Like he won't remember this." But like deep down this probably caused Craig to have a lot of a lot of sleepless nights and maybe even PTSD. Like I I I I genuinely feel bad for Craig. That's really tough. But I think the thing with Craig is I think it just wasn't a good match up. I mean like I said he he just looks a lot older, you know, she's more into this guy. He's closer to her age. He's a little bit better looking. You know, I think Craig he he probably did fine. Like he probably He's at least a decent looking guy, you know.

[00:10:39]I'm sure he found someone, got married, had kids. Like I'm sure Craig would be fine. But this moment like that's That had to be a really broke brutal moment in Craig's life. And next up we have off snipe Savannah snipe. How you doing ladies? My name is Ben. I'm a financial analyst and I'm from Bray.

[00:10:57]>> [cheering and applause] >> AND FROM BRAY, YOU'RE WELCOME to the show, sir. But ladies, are you turned on or turned off?

[00:11:04]>> [music] >> 19 lights off in that round with 11 left. Let's go and have a chat with a couple of those. So it's really unfortunate that so many of these girls turned their lights out on Ron Weasley.

[00:11:20]I think this isn't a shocker though.

[00:11:21]Unfortunately, he's not the best looking guy. And a show like Take Me Out tends to be the most brutal because girls are solely going off of his looks and nothing else in the first round. I think the biggest issue this guy has is he's he's balding pretty significantly. The North Reaper snatches hair line faster than Britney Renner snatches up her NBA players. On top of that, I think most women don't prefer guys with red hair.

[00:11:43]It's just kind of a fact and that's just kind of the way it is. He also has pretty non-existent eyebrows and overall just isn't a great looking guy and this all subconsciously I think factored into, you know, why the vast majority of girls shut their lights off.

[00:11:56]Megan, you were first out in that round. Yeah.

[00:11:59]What happened? Um I don't like his dress sense at all. Oh, poor guy. I really don't like the boots with the jeans tucked in. I just don't like it. What a crock of [ __ ] It's crazy the the reasons people give for rejecting someone. I really just think she just saw him and she wasn't attracted to him and she doesn't want to hurt his feelings. So, she's like, "Yeah, I don't like his the jeans tucked into his boots. That's the reason I rejected him." Sure, sure.

[00:12:24]I think it's it's quite Well, aside from the the the the trousers being tucked into the boots, I'm not going to judge another guy on his dress sense. I mean, for Christ's sake. But, you know, he's got the the the blazer and the the shirt.

[00:12:34]>> No?

[00:12:35]>> Don't like the blazer either.

[00:12:36]Sorry. Do you have a stylist or do you dress yourself? Uh well, stylist is fired now, so he's just Catherine, Yes.

[00:12:44]lights out for you as well. Why? Um some of the girls said they like chic geek, but that's not just for me. Now, you have lovely teeth, Thank you very much.

[00:12:51]but just not my taste.

[00:12:53]But just not my taste. Just not for you.

[00:12:55]Well, that's fair enough. Look, there's nothing I can do about that. So, I actually really appreciate this girl's honesty. She was straight up she basically straight up told him in a nice way that he just wasn't her type and that's totally fine. Not every girl's going to be into you. Jolene, when I go out with men, I do like to talk about work at the end of the day.

[00:13:12]He's a financial analyst and I think that would be a little bit boring to talk about, so Who wants to talk about work after work, in fact? Well, that's fair enough, yeah.

[00:13:20]Surely you could find other things to do with your spare time. No, financial analyst.

[00:13:24]>> What do you do, Jolene?

[00:13:25]Um, nothing.

[00:13:33]The audacity is on another level with Jolene when she says that she couldn't she can't see herself talking to him after work cuz he's a financial analyst and she's [ __ ] unemployed. That's beyond brutal, man. That's insane. It's like if you're going to like, you know, criticize someone's job title and say it's boring, at least have a [ __ ] job. [laughter] It's insane. Her rejecting him had nothing to do with him being a financial analyst. This guy could have been a cop, a firefighter, a pilot. Like Like he could have had he could have had like a job that women find very sexy and she would still reject him. Licia.

[00:14:08]Lights out. Yes. Um, speaking of tight trousers.

[00:14:13]They're all the rage. Yeah, they're the in thing now. Yeah, no, not really. And the boots as well. I didn't really like the style. That's it for me. And the hair. So this girl rejected him for his fashion and his hair. I think the latter is more of the what's really happening below the surface, but I I do think that fashion does make a difference when it comes to attracting women. I do think if you dress well, you dress in a way that fits your body type and you have the right color combinations, it can definitely like give you a slight boost with women. Like someone especially if they like that particular style and they dress that way themselves.

[00:14:51]But I don't think that fashion is going to be like boosting your SMB or like really making girls that wouldn't be attracted to you suddenly attracted to you. But I think that this girl subconsciously when he when she sees his red his red balding hair, I think she instinctively sees that as very unattractive and she can't picture herself dating him.

[00:15:12]That's unfortunate, but you know, really once once you start losing your hair and it becomes very obvious, you look much much older and it really takes away from your attractiveness. Carrie.

[00:15:24]>> [laughter] >> Hi Tony. Hey, what's the story? Your lights off as well. Yeah, he just looks like the type of chap that I would really do something. Oh, you know what chap the word no?

[00:15:35]So I think this is the halo effect happening in real time. She looks at him and she sees his different flaws that she has. She sees that he's much much older than her and she automatically like subconsciously thinks negative things of his like his personality and his character and the way he could be.

[00:15:52]And this is just a raw part of life that happens all the time. He just looks like She turned off your light on the basis of what you think he type of guy he might be. [laughter] He's just not my style like what age you? I'm 31.

[00:16:06]31? I'm 18 like 18 oh well that's fair enough. There's a there's an age gap.

[00:16:09]There's a big age gap. That's all right.

[00:16:11]That's fine. So yeah, I do think 13 years is a pretty big age gap. But let's just be honest if she found him super attractive, she wouldn't really mind that age gap. Like she'd be like, oh I want to try out like an older guy. I want to see what this guy's like. Could be even be like a turn on at that point.

[00:16:25]Minerva, some good news at the end down here please.

[00:16:29]Oh lord. You're one of the ones with the light on. I know I know I know I heard financial analyst and I just counting money in my head.

[00:16:39]That's got to be soul crushing for Ron to hear that. It's like one of the very few women that actually kept their lights on just wants you solely for your money. Like that's got to be so brutal and so demoralizing on so many levels.

[00:16:51]It's like, yeah, she doesn't like me for my my appearance from the get-go, but she likes me because of the potential to take her on trips and give her a a fancy lifestyle. That's brutal. A money digger?

[00:17:05]Okay Ben, you've got 11 lights still remaining and another chance to impress our ladies coming up right now. You've got 30 seconds to knock their socks off.

[00:17:13]Remember girls, if you're feeling Milton, hit that button as Ben gets flirty for thirty.

[00:17:20]Well, girls, I'm probably not that your average guy next door and there's a good chance you've probably not gone on a date with a guy like me before. I'm at a kind of a a weird stage in my life right now. My career, my personal life is already about to take off and I'm really ready for that special someone right beside me to take along the adventure.

[00:17:40]>> [applause] >> Okay, buddy.

[00:17:43]The last four in that round. Let's go and see what it was that turned off a couple of our ladies. Madison, lights off.

[00:17:51]Yeah, I'm kind of a bit scared. I think you're looking for a commitment and I don't know, I'm not really ready for a commitment right now. Then why the hell would you go on the show if you weren't looking for a commitment? Like it's just insane like the kind of the gaslighting that some of these women will give this guy when they're not attracted to him.

[00:18:10]And I also think if she did if she did find a guy super attractive, she would definitely be ready to commit to that guy. She just doesn't find She just doesn't find Ron attractive and that's that's that's okay at the end of the day, but just don't lie about it. Just be up front.

[00:18:23]>> [laughter] >> Jesse, lights still on as well for you.

[00:18:24]It is, yeah.

[00:18:26]Um he's not my usual type, but I'd be willing to give him a try. So this girl comes out and says that he's not her type, but she's still willing to go on a date with him and I don't think this is good to be honest. From my experience, when a girl when you're not a girl's type and she doesn't have that like raw genuine attraction for you, she could use him for just like a foodie date and have her have her pay for a full course meal and she has no She has absolutely no intention of seeing him again and he gets his hopes up and she just, you know, never talks to him again. I think that's what would happen here if she actually did end up giving him a chance.

[00:18:59]It's their chance to find out a little bit more about you.

[00:19:02]Ladies, if you're turned off, turn off and take a look at this.

[00:19:08]He likes these alternative sort of girls. He likes these rocky [music] chicks. He uh Barry always thinks he's crazy. I hope they don't mind me saying that. His friends think he's a big gay cuz [music] he still lives with his mommy and his fluffy dog. And the reason [music] is because he dances all the time, he loves his mom, and he loves his dog. Barry has had many [music] hairstyles over the years, and he spends a lot of time on his hair and products and making it look right. So, he needs to spend less time on his hair and more time [music] on the girl. Oh, no, Barry, that's a total blackout.

[00:19:42]>> [laughter] >> Yo, his friend is the worst wing woman on the planet. The fact that she Her pitch was basically his friends think he's gay, he spends too much time doing his hair, and he lives with his mom, but give him a chance. Please, please give Ron a chance. Like, that's that's a That's the worst wing woman in the on the in the entire world. That's brutal.

[00:20:03]I'm already sad about that, man. Don't you be awing him now. You turned off your lights.

[00:20:09]Poor Barry. What makes this even more brutal is that the host is like taking shots at him as well. He's like, "Oh, you poor thing." Even the girls that did leave their lights on for for Ron, they were eventually going to turn their lights off as well. I just really think the producers of this show probably got bad ratings when they did blackouts, so they pretty much they told some of the girls like even if you're not attracted to the guy like we can't have everybody turning off their lights off after the first round. So, they probably had some of the girls just like leave their lights on till the second or third round, even though none of the girls had any sort of attraction to him, and they had no intention of like keeping their lights on and going on a date with him.

[00:20:48]>> It just didn't suit you, you like you don't know what you're missing. I mean to say he's he's a little daisy, this one. This one's a keeper. This one's for life. I think that's probably what put a lot of you off, actually, to be fair.

[00:20:57]As I say, no one goes home from the show empty-handed, and I have something for you here. Oh, thank you. No chance you could just drop drop off my dry cleaning on the way home, could you? Cheers.

[00:21:04]Thanks very much. Give it UP FOR BEN, EVERYBODY.

[00:21:06]>> [cheering] [music] [music] [cheering] [music] >> COULD YOU IMAGINE GETTING REJECTED by like 30 women on on a live television show? They told you every single reason they didn't like you or that they weren't attracted to you.

[00:21:33]As you're walking out, they even play the lonely song all by myself.

[00:21:40]Like that's that's got to be the biggest humiliation ritual of all time. Like you're just like they're just like the producers are just rubbing it rubbing it in this guy's tears at this point while he's walking out. His confidence is crushed, his self-esteem is down the drain. He has to go back to his family and explain that everyone turned their lights off. All his friends are probably ripping on him. His co-workers are like, "Oh, how'd that dating show go, Ron?"

[00:22:05]And he's like, "Yeah, I got all I got blacked out. No girls chose me." And they they played all by myself as I'm going out. I'm sure um when he gets on Zoom calls and they and they ask they they do the icebreaker, "What's been your most embarrassing moment?" He brings this up every single time. Poor Ron, that's brutal. But honestly, at the end of the day, like these dating shows, they really are a huge humiliation ritual for men, especially if they're like unattractive or if they're put in a situation like, you know, Craig where he's like an older guy who's balding versus a a younger guy and a younger girl they're competing for. It's just like dating shows really do they're just so humiliating in so many different ways. I definitely respect people who go on dating shows because it definitely takes balls, especially when producers and editors work hard to paint the contestants in a bad light. Well, if you've enjoyed this video, feel free to give it a like, feel free to comment down below, and feel free to subscribe. Until next time, ladies and gentlemen, cheers.