From 40 Foster Homes to 100 OD’s & F3ntanyl Addiction

本站添加: 2026-05-13

[00:00:00]Fetty comes around. Fetti is when I really fall in love. Just that punch that that that initial knockout blow.

[00:00:06]Exactly. That's when I I fall in love is Fetty. So Fetty starts showing up. I think this is 2019.

[00:00:14]2018 2019. First time I they call it FET is what they were calling it at first.

[00:00:19]Yeah.

[00:00:19]>> So everybody's calling it FET.

[00:00:21]>> I love FET. And so um there's a dude that was in Delaware. He could get it, but we had to go to the east side of Columbus to get it. And I go downhill quickly. I get kicked out of my mom's.

[00:00:30]Now I'm staying with my grandma's. I OD at my grandma.

[00:00:33]>> Your everyday habit now only.

[00:00:34]>> Now every single day, every chance. I'm still still kind of working a job.

[00:00:38]>> IV drug use?

[00:00:39]>> Nope. Snorting.

[00:00:40]>> Snorting only.

[00:00:41]>> Snorting only. That's it. And I'm staying in uh at my grandma's OD for the first time though.

[00:00:47]>> Ah, poor grandma. Grandma find you?

[00:00:49]>> So my cousin found me and but they had to do CPR. They had to push open the door. Ambulance comes. My grandma kicks me out the house. Yeah. So, it's my first time ODing. Actually, no, this is my second time ODing. First time I ODed ever, I ODed on suboxin.

[00:01:19]>> Hey Lou, I'm a person. I'm a recovering drug addict. I want to tell my story.

[00:01:22]How do I do that? Well, Aaron, it's as simple as uh emailing us at getaggripodcast614gmail.com or going to our formfill in our link tree and filling it out.

[00:01:31]>> That easy, huh?

[00:01:32]>> That easy. And then you can come on and share your story.

[00:01:34]>> We got an empty chair waiting for you.

[00:01:36]>> What else should they do?

[00:01:37]>> Guys, as recovering addicts, we're open to feedback, right? So, please hit the like button, subscribe to the channel, >> share, comment, please. And if you're already a subscriber, we really appreciate your support. Thank you.

[00:01:48]>> And if you're not, we don't want Oh, and we're back. Hey, Lou. zoned out for a minute there. Uh we're back. We got a sweet guest came in from Athens, right about an hour away.

[00:01:58]>> Yep.

[00:01:58]>> Chase Tomac. I said that right. Yep.

[00:02:01]>> Hallelujah. It's going to be good already. We're off to a good start.

[00:02:03]Thanks for coming. Yeah. Thanks for coming out, brother. Appreciate it.

[00:02:05]>> And yeah, on short like short notice. I literally just talked to you Monday is when we first talked and then >> bada bing bada boom. Here you are.

[00:02:11]>> Yes, sir.

[00:02:12]>> So, let's uh get into it, man. Um yeah, let's just start off like at childhood.

[00:02:17]How was childhood for you? Uh, so I am from the west side of Columbus. Uh, I grew up uh on Ogden Avenue. Don't know if you guys know where that is.

[00:02:25]>> Oh, I know. Yep. All I know.

[00:02:27]>> Yeah. 317 North Ogden, 295 North Ogden.

[00:02:30]Those I lived on four, five different houses on that block. Uh, grew up there with my three sisters and my mom. Uh, we had a stepdad, uh, Elbug. Shout out to Elbug if you see this. Elbug.

[00:02:42]>> Yeah. His name is Larry, but we all call him Elug. Yeah. That's his name.

[00:02:46]>> Shout out Elbug. Elbug. Yep. So, uh, so you know, before we got to Ogden, uh, I was a crack baby. Um, so was an incubator. Um, my mom was, uh, struggling with addiction. Um, her and my father both were struggling with addiction. Um, when we were about one and a half, my grandma uh, called CPS and she got custody of us. Um, during this time, my mom kind of went full-fledged. They lost the place. she started um you know running the streets, smoking crack, running the bottoms. Um during this time uh my aunt had an abusive husband and he beat my cousin and my mom and my uncle went over there and they uh they beat this guy up pretty badly. My mom got a felonious assault and she ended up getting five years in prison.

[00:03:35]>> Damn.

[00:03:35]>> Yeah.

[00:03:35]>> Wow.

[00:03:36]>> Yeah.

[00:03:36]>> So they beat that they beat your mom and her your cousin >> or your mom and her your aunt. My mom and her brother >> brother. Okay.

[00:03:44]>> Beat my auntie's uh husband up.

[00:03:48]>> They knock they knocked his eye out of him head.

[00:03:50]>> Wow.

[00:03:50]>> Yeah.

[00:03:51]>> Got five years. So mom's now out of the picture completely.

[00:03:54]>> Yeah. She's in prison. We're me and my sisters, my cousins, we're all living with my grandmother on Ogden.

[00:03:59]>> Okay. Is grandma like got her life together at least?

[00:04:01]>> Yeah. Grandma Grandpa works a solid job.

[00:04:04]Uh grandma stays at home with all the kids.

[00:04:05]>> Okay. And grandma's good to everybody.

[00:04:07]>> Yeah. Yeah. Well, grandma is abusive, but better than >> in a grandma way. Like, >> she's pretty pretty abusive.

[00:04:15]>> Okay.

[00:04:16]>> Yeah. She's uh she's uh got her own own stuff going on.

[00:04:20]>> She's got her own style.

[00:04:21]>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like say the least.

[00:04:23]>> Yeah. Like uh get caught um lying ebar soap. Uh she's old school.

[00:04:29]>> Yeah. Exactly. Old school. Exactly.

[00:04:31]Yeah. Yeah. So, but pretty abusive.

[00:04:33]>> Pick a tree or a branch off the tree.

[00:04:34]>> Exactly. Yeah. Pick your own whip type thing. Um, yeah. So, exactly. So, um, mom goes to prison. Uh, >> how old are you when mom goes to prison?

[00:04:42]>> So, I think I'm three when she goes to prison. So, I don't remember. I'm 3 years old. Uh, just looking back on the timeline, I think I was three when So, from a year and a half to three, I was with my grandma and I believe she went to prison when I was three.

[00:04:56]>> So, really nothing like you just Mom's not there. That's all you really know.

[00:05:00]>> Yeah, exactly. I don't remember any of this. This is just my timeline of me being a baby. I don't know any of this.

[00:05:07]This is all learned once I'm older.

[00:05:09]Okay, gotcha.

[00:05:10]>> So, um, yeah, mom goes to prison. Um, so, so getting into my timeline of when I actually remember. Uh, so when my mom gets out of prison, we uh she gets her stuff together. We all get a place and we're probably 10 doors down from my grandmother's house across the street on Ogden. We My grandma lives at 295, we live at 274, something like that. So, we're just right down the street. Um, as time progresses, uh, you know, things are going good. I'm in sports, my sisters are, you know, cheerleading.

[00:05:43]Everything's going good. Um, and then we have an an incident that happens, uh, when I'm about nine. Uh, my, it starts with a prank phone call. This turns into an all day event. Uh, me and my car loads of people end up pulling up at our house and, uh, me and my all my sisters, we get pepper-sprayed while my mom's at work.

[00:06:03]>> Oh, god. By who?

[00:06:05]>> By. So it was two cheerleaders. So my sister was a cheerleader and this other girl was a cheerleader.

[00:06:10]>> Okay.

[00:06:10]>> They pranked phone called it turned into a fist fight. They showed up at our house with car loads of people.

[00:06:16]>> They they pepper- sprrayed us. Cops come. My mom leaves work. Uh we get uh you know checked out by EMS, everything.

[00:06:25]My mom tells all the cops to get out the house. She'll take care of it. So we call you know, all my cousins over, everybody over, and we get car loads full of people. Oh god, you're about to go retaliate.

[00:06:34]>> Exactly, >> man.

[00:06:35]>> Exactly. So, so, so it will be a common theme there. So, my mom was a gangster.

[00:06:39]Yeah. Like, she just was. That's just how she was.

[00:06:43]>> Um, so my my mom gets all my cousins to come over. Um, we go I go down to my grandmother's house because I'm I'm only nine at the time.

[00:06:51]>> They go over there. Um, they circle around the block. Nobody's there. So, they go there probably four or five times throughout the day. Nobody ends up being there. Well, they say they're going to go one last time. and they end up going there. They're getting back.

[00:07:04]This all came out in the transcripts in the court case. They just got back from the uh uh airport. And so when they got back from the airport, they pulled up on them. They get out. My mom starts fighting with the mom of the family. The rest of the people run in the house.

[00:07:19]Well, mind you, we got four or five car loads there. So everybody jumps out and chases them all into the house.

[00:07:24]>> No, no.

[00:07:25]>> So they come to start running out the house. They all get pepper sprayed. Guy comes out. My cousin ends up hitting him with a brick.

[00:07:33]>> Damn.

[00:07:33]>> Yeah. A whole bunch of stuff. The girl, all the bones end up getting broken in her face. They come arrest my mom.

[00:07:38]>> Wow.

[00:07:39]>> Yeah. So, my mom's now got her second Phelon assault. My mom's going back to prison again.

[00:07:44]>> So, that's one hell of a retaliation, bud.

[00:07:47]>> Yeah. Well, I mean, yeah. This Yeah, that's how my family is. Like, you get one over us, we always >> we go 10fold.

[00:07:53]>> Exactly. What uh what's mom looking at this time?

[00:07:57]>> So, so this is her second time. Uh, so it's depending on if she's going to go to trial or not. I don't remember what they offered her because they offered her plea deal that was laid down to and she almost took her last plea offer.

[00:08:07]>> But during this time why she's fighting this case cuz my grandma ends up bonding her out.

[00:08:12]>> Okay.

[00:08:12]>> Get a lawyer. Now we're fighting the case. Well, this goes on for like two years. So, we have like a two-year period or maybe a year and a half where she's now fighting the case.

[00:08:22]>> Um, during this time though, my mom starts diving deep in her addiction.

[00:08:26]>> So, she's back. She's back.

[00:08:28]>> Yeah, exactly. But now it's not crack, now it's pain pills.

[00:08:31]>> Oh man.

[00:08:32]>> Yeah. So now now uh my mom had first time she went to prison, she had met some people while she was in prison. And I have an aunt that she got really close with. She's not really my aunt, but my mom met her in prison. So we call her aunt. She gets in a relationship with her brother. He just did 25 years in federal prison.

[00:08:49]>> Oh boy.

[00:08:50]>> So now he meets the Mexican connects, everything like that. They're bringing in pills. She starts uh using pills.

[00:08:57]During this time, life gets really quick for me. I get kicked out of my mom's. I have to go live with my dad.

[00:09:02]>> Your biological dad?

[00:09:03]>> My biological dad. Okay. Which I've never lived with my biological.

[00:09:06]>> Have you met You met him, right?

[00:09:07]>> My biological dad. Yeah. On Christmases, things like that. He's an alcoholic.

[00:09:11]>> Okay.

[00:09:11]>> Like homeless on the streets, alcoholic, but he always goes to live with my grandmother.

[00:09:15]>> Okay.

[00:09:16]>> So, my mom, I'm acting out cuz now she's on pain pills. She's always staying with this guy. I get kicked out the house. I get uh sent to the bottoms to live with my dad. Um >> what's that what's that vibe look like?

[00:09:28]You guys is weird because like you basically don't know each other.

[00:09:31]>> Yeah, exactly. Dad's never there. I'm running the streets. I'm running the bottoms with my cousins.

[00:09:36]>> God.

[00:09:37]>> Yeah. So during this time um one of somebody that we know ends up getting shot at this time while I'm there.

[00:09:45]>> So my mom comes to pick me up because they're talking about shooting up the house and all this is going on. So, my mom comes and gets me and she takes me with her to go stay at her boyfriend's house. His name was Neil. Um, during this time that I'm staying with her, she can't handle me. I'm freaking out. Um, uh, life has now been turned upside down. So, she kicks me out staying with her and her boyfriend. She sends me out to Delaware to live with my grandmother.

[00:10:08]So, I'm going from the west side of Columbus, not to Delaware.

[00:10:11]>> Yeah.

[00:10:12]>> So, um, I go out to stay in Delaware with my grandmother. At this time, we're going to now Now we're in trial. My mom's taken it to trial. My mom ends up getting convicted of this felonious assault. They give her another five years.

[00:10:24]>> Oh, mom.

[00:10:25]>> Yeah.

[00:10:26]>> So now my grandma's getting custody of me. She's getting custody of my sister.

[00:10:31]My other two sisters, they're uh 16. My other sister's 18. So they're running the streets of the west side.

[00:10:37]>> So even your sisters are acting a fool, too.

[00:10:39]>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We're all going back through my life. My house was the flop house. Drugs were always done there. This is just how our life was. My house was the party house. It was always dope boys at my house. Um, when I say dope boys, I mean like selling weed, pills, things like that, not a straight trap with door man and stuff like that.

[00:10:58]>> Um, so we go I get my grandmother gets custody and I'm now in sixth grade.

[00:11:04]Well, Franklin County is not like Delaware County. Like not at all. Um, I get to school within the first uh month of school. I'm expel Oh, sorry. I got to back up. I don't know how you guys can match this up. I'm sorry. So, in third grade, while I'm living with my grandmother, I in Delaware.

[00:11:21]>> No, >> here on the west side.

[00:11:22]>> On the west side. Sorry, guys. I'm never done. No, I'm >> I'm with you. I'm with you, buddy.

[00:11:26]>> I get expelled in third grade. Um because I knock out the uh You guys have peak. You guys know what Peak is?

[00:11:32]>> Is that for the like the trouble kids?

[00:11:34]>> Yeah, exactly. It's in school suspension.

[00:11:36]>> I'm fighting with another kid and the peak teacher, her name is Miss Collie.

[00:11:39]She grabs me from behind and I like swing my arm back. Oh no. And she falls and hits her head and it knocks her unconscious.

[00:11:45]>> God, buddy.

[00:11:46]>> So I get expelled out of third grade.

[00:11:48]>> Oh. Out of third grade.

[00:11:49]>> So then fifth grade comes around.

[00:11:52]>> Mind you, I'm on IEP, so they still have to like try to figure things out for me.

[00:11:56]So they send me to West Elementary.

[00:11:58]>> Fifth grade, I get kicked out for smoking weed in the school bathroom.

[00:12:00]>> In fifth grade, though. Fifth grade.

[00:12:02]Yeah.

[00:12:02]>> So third grade, accidentally knock a teacher up. Fifth grade, you get expelled for smoking weed in school.

[00:12:07]>> Yep.

[00:12:08]>> That's insane. So now I'm going to Delaware and they have all my transcripts from Franklin or from Franklin County.

[00:12:13]>> They're probably like, "What the [ __ ] is this?"

[00:12:14]>> Exactly. So I'm there for less than a month. I get my third fight.

[00:12:18]>> They expel me out of Delaware City Schools.

[00:12:20]>> Damn.

[00:12:21]>> Delaware does not play. They're not finding alternative schools. They're not.

[00:12:24]>> So my grandma's like, "I don't know what to do with you. I like I have no other option." She sticks me in foster care.

[00:12:30]>> Okay. So, I go from Delaware to foster care and I end up with a African-American family and call it racist, not racist. She call me white boy and where I'm from. Like, I just don't like that [ __ ] >> This your foster mom white boy.

[00:12:46]>> Yeah. She's just calling me white boy.

[00:12:48]That's a bit much.

[00:12:49]>> Yeah. So, she she's got me [ __ ] up.

[00:12:51]So, not only that, so she uh in the foster home, it's me, another kid, and then her biological son. Yeah.

[00:12:58]>> Me and the other kid, we get locked upstairs from the time we get home from school until it's time to eat dinner.

[00:13:03]And there's no snacks, no TV. All we can do is read books.

[00:13:06]>> Oh my god.

[00:13:07]>> So, I'm there for like two days and I'm like, I got to go. Like, I got to find a way out of here. So, >> on my way home from school, I'm like, I got to run away. I try to run away, but I get too scared. I get freaked out. I come back in. Well, they send out um what's called a CASA worker. Do you ever heard of a CASA worker in foster care?

[00:13:23]>> So, they they've they advocate for kids rights is what they Okay.

[00:13:27]>> And uh during that time when she gets there, I start making up whole bunch stuff. I'm like, she's beating me. She's doing this. Like I'm I'm trying to get out of here all of a sudden. Yeah.

[00:13:36]>> Yeah. I'm just trying I'm just trying to get out of here. And so she's not buying any of it. So I just like walk past her.

[00:13:42]I grab my coat. I leave. And it's the middle of a winter storm. So Oh, buddy.

[00:13:46]>> Yeah. I used to have long curly hair. I walk and I I just keep walking. I end up at a speedway. I use their phone. I call my aunt. And uh my hair is frozen my head. So they tell me to go to the bathroom. I use the like dryer on the wall. You push the button.

[00:13:58]>> Yeah.

[00:13:58]>> And defrosts my hair. My aunt comes and picks me up and she takes me to or she takes me back to her house. Well, they call CPS cuz now they they got me. I'm run run I'm a runaway uh kid. So, they're like, "We're going to send somebody out there." So, they send a um like the on call case worker and they take me to a house that's in um Anyways, I I don't remember where it is, but >> to another foster family.

[00:14:24]>> Exactly. I go to it's called Rest Pit, another foster family.

[00:14:27]>> Okay.

[00:14:28]>> So during this time, sorry I'm missing so many pieces. I'm sorry guys. I'm on probation for the fight that I got in in Delaware County.

[00:14:35]>> Okay.

[00:14:36]>> So I have my own felonious assault now and I'm on juvenile probation.

[00:14:40]>> And you're how old?

[00:14:41]>> Uh 11.

[00:14:43]>> Jeez, that's crazy. But >> yeah, so I've already I've already been locked up at uh Central Ohio Youth Center. You guys have ever heard of that?

[00:14:48]>> I think I have. Yeah.

[00:14:49]>> So it's it's right outside of West Central. I know you know CBCF. It's right. You can see it from from the parking lot.

[00:14:55]>> So, I've already been locked out there.

[00:14:56]Well, they send me to a rest pit home at this time. And uh they're just waiting for the week cuz I ran away on a Friday.

[00:15:03]I knew I wasn't staying at that foster home through the weekend cuz I'm not going to be able to leave here and go to school for the days. I'm not staying here. So, it's on a Friday. I stay with the the family's name is uh Mr. and Mrs. Good. Super great family. Um, dad was a military guy, but it's like the first time I was like in a house that like felt like felt like uh actual family and like uh we go and like eat pancakes in the morning like we do all this cool stuff when my PO shows up on Monday morning and he rest me takes me to uh Craw Youth Center >> at 11.

[00:15:35]>> At 11. Yeah.

[00:15:38]>> So, I violated my my papers what happened. Um >> I didn't know you can get like in legal trouble that young. I thought it was like 12 and up or something like that.

[00:15:46]That's >> Yeah, >> that's absurd. At 11 years old, you've already got some Yeah. Expulsions, which is that's out of school period, right?

[00:15:53]>> Yeah. That's not suspension. Now you're gone.

[00:15:55]>> And then now you're [ __ ] uh probation or whatever you call it.

[00:15:59]>> Busted PV.

[00:16:01]>> Um what's the So you go to the You said like a juvenile.

[00:16:05]>> Mhm.

[00:16:05]>> What's that like when you get in there?

[00:16:07]>> Yeah. So juvenile detention. So first off, I'm the youngest one in there. So that how they set you in rooms. So there's two different wings. There's a north wing, a south wing, and then there's an east wing, but that's for the females.

[00:16:20]>> Okay.

[00:16:20]>> So, um they set you by age with whoever you're going to be bunkked with. So, since I'm 11, I have nobody else my age, so I'm in a bunk by myself. And it's just uh when you walk in, so very first thing when I very first walked in there first time, um they do like an intake and they make you get naked. And I remember how like uncomfortable I was having to get naked in front of these cos and so have you squat, cough, do everything. Well, you have to go to classes throughout the day. Um you so like the females their wing is right off of our like living like it's like a day room. Um whenever they come through you have to put your head down.

[00:17:00]You're not allowed to look at them. And whenever you walk through the hallways you have to cross your arms. You have to put your arms across your chest like this. Is that to keep you from touching them?

[00:17:08]>> Which is period. Anytime you're walking through the hallways, your arms have to be crossed. Got to be crossed.

[00:17:12]>> Yeah. Anytime you're moving anywhere, any movement, you have to have your arms crossed.

[00:17:15]>> Um like whenever you guys eat, there's no talking whenever you're eating. It's just like all these like >> crazy rules. And I'm 11 and so like I'm uh easily uh manipulated into doing things by these older kids that are 16, 17, 18. So they got me doing uh stupid stuff like putting we had a water fountain and I used to put paper in it and one time a guard went to go get a drink and it smacked him and stuck him on the side of the face. So I got put they had these three they had uh different um punishments. They had cooling off RC which was room confinement and then IDC hearing which was an internal hearing meaning that you had to uh like go in front of a >> board. Exactly. Um I'm I'm not exactly sure who that was made up of. Um but my very first time getting in trouble was for that for the spitball thing.

[00:18:05]>> Exactly. That hit the officer in the face. So they put me on AR or uh uh a cooling off which is one hour in your room but it's in there with no mats, no books, no anything.

[00:18:14]>> So you're just sitting there for an hour.

[00:18:16]>> Yeah. You get a Bible. That's it. Okay.

[00:18:17]So for 1 hour you're stuck in this room.

[00:18:19]I freak out. It's my first time out for the one hour.

[00:18:22]>> Yeah. I'm crying. I'm pushing my button a million times like let me out of here.

[00:18:25]I'm 11. Like I've never been on my own ever. light. So, I'm freaking out. Well, there uh happened to be this officer in there named Officer Stallone. Officer Stallone was also a uh foster parent.

[00:18:36]Super cool. He explained like, "Look, you're only going to be in there for an hour. Like, you did it. Like, you just have to take the time."

[00:18:43]>> So, anyways, that's a little bit of how how that works. That's going to come in more of effect throughout my process of going through foster care. Um I'm going to keep going back there until eventually I'm going to spend a lot of time there.

[00:18:54]>> Damn, buddy.

[00:18:55]>> Yeah. Um >> what's up with your dad? Like is he what's he doing?

[00:18:58]>> He's alcoholic.

[00:18:59]>> So he's just dead beat all the way.

[00:19:01]>> Exactly. He's uh homeless in the bottoms of Columbus.

[00:19:04]>> Okay.

[00:19:05]>> Yep. That's that's his life. He's he's literally uh wired ash rose is his drink.

[00:19:10]>> Golly.

[00:19:11]>> Yeah. That's every day panhandling.

[00:19:14]Um sitting outside a gas station asking for money.

[00:19:17]>> Uh so you get how long do you serve in there for that violation?

[00:19:21]>> So first violation. I'm not sure how long I actually was there the first time. Um maybe a couple weeks.

[00:19:28]>> Okay.

[00:19:28]>> I honestly I don't know if it's from >> if it's my mind protecting me or what, but my timeline is really messed up from juvenile.

[00:19:36]>> Yeah. So I don't I'm not exactly sure how long I was there the very first time.

[00:19:40]>> But I leave there and I go to another false I I I go to many many different foster homes in this spin spin of time of I'm running away, getting kicked out in trouble, getting locked back up. Um all throughout this time um I end up going so like the the notable so I end up in like 40 something different foster homes.

[00:20:00]>> No [ __ ] >> Yeah. But like within a year.

[00:20:02]>> Damn.

[00:20:03]>> Within a year? Yeah.

[00:20:04]>> How do you live like that, man?

[00:20:06]>> So I'm not even making into schools. I'm getting kicked out before I even get entered into schools. Plus during this time I'm going back to live with family members, too. So they're getting custody back on me. I'm getting kicked out of there.

[00:20:15]>> Getting hot potatoed all. And are are you leaving these foster homes all like are the foster parents like no [ __ ] this guy. I can't handle this kid, too.

[00:20:22]>> So, some of them were for that. So, so notable ones, uh, so one of the foster homes that I was in, um, I got taken out of because there was two foster kids there, ended up having sex with the dogs and they were having sex with each other.

[00:20:36]>> Wait a minute. So, the foster kids were hooking up with the dogs.

[00:20:41]>> Yes.

[00:20:41]>> And as well as each other.

[00:20:43]>> Yes. And so, >> so like a boy girl kind of >> two boys.

[00:20:46]>> Oh my god. Others.

[00:20:48]>> And one of the kids was over 18. He was just over 18, was just about to emancipate, and the other kid was uh I think 16.

[00:20:56]>> That's the most horrific thing I've ever heard.

[00:20:58]>> Disgusting.

[00:20:59]>> Yeah.

[00:21:00]>> Uh yeah. Jeez, bro. And at any point in your young life, are you like, is this just your world? Have you accepted this as your plight in life or is it like this is not normal?

[00:21:10]>> Yeah. So, I think I think everything was just kind of uh survival mode. So, I was just kind of just just figuring out where I I was just kind of surviving that whole time. just however just to make it.

[00:21:21]>> God brother.

[00:21:22]>> Yeah. Um so so that's one of the notable instance of or reason I was taken out of the home and I wasn't there during the time of all this happening. I was out on rest pit. You guys know what rest pit is?

[00:21:33]>> No.

[00:21:33]>> So rest pit is for like foster families.

[00:21:36]If kids acting up or whatever, they can get a break by sending you off to another foster home for a weekend.

[00:21:40]>> That just seems so anti like we're just going to get rid of you for a while then. Yeah. Like >> oh what a screwed system.

[00:21:48]>> Then you can come back. Yeah.

[00:21:50]>> So, so also at this foster home, the same one where this ended up happening, I had a suite there. This was out in uh Do you guys know where Lucas is? It's out by Mansfield.

[00:21:59]>> Oh, yeah.

[00:21:59]>> So, it's it's way way out because they have to keep sending me further and farther because I kept running. So, they was just trying to get me as far out so I would stop running away. Um during that time, uh my foster brother, his name was Mike, his mom was locked up with my mom. They were both at OW. And so, we've had visits cuz we still get to see our parents because they didn't lose their rights. It was easy for them to transport us both almost all the way to Marian. Exactly. We'd go with our families, then they would pick us both back up. So, it was sweet for them.

[00:22:26]>> Well, Mike was he started sleeping with one of the uh case workers >> at the foster care.

[00:22:32]>> Yeah. Foster care. His case worker from Franklin County.

[00:22:34]>> Wow, man.

[00:22:34]>> So, she was bringing him cigarettes and everything. Well, me and him was close.

[00:22:37]He was 17. I was like 11. And so, I caught wind of this. Now, I got her bringing me a cell phone, bringing me dip. And so, I get in on this. I'm not sleeping with her, but now I know about this.

[00:22:48]>> Yeah. You just got the guilt thing over her head.

[00:22:50]>> Exactly. I got you. I got you. I I I pretty much am blackmailing you.

[00:22:54]>> So, I'm I'm getting dip and um cigarettes. I get She gets me one of those uh silver razor. Remember the Razor cell phones?

[00:23:02]>> Oh, yeah.

[00:23:03]>> Just my favorite phone ever. Yeah. So, I got a cell phone now. She's paying my minutes like portable the >> Jesus.

[00:23:09]>> Yeah. The little plans.

[00:23:10]>> Got 11.

[00:23:11]>> Yeah. And that's insane. That's the system at this time is >> she's hooking up with the the clients or her the kids.

[00:23:19]>> Not that rare. It's not that rare.

[00:23:21]>> That just blows my mind, man.

[00:23:23]>> Yeah.

[00:23:23]>> It's not that rare.

[00:23:25]>> So, Mike uh I end up getting taped from that foster home and the place I was at rest pit at ends up taking me as >> as full time.

[00:23:33]>> Yeah. Full time.

[00:23:35]So I get into trouble there too for I think saying some inappropriate things to the neighbor girl like trying to hook up with her or whatever. So I'm just now I'm going through these houses like now I'm not lasting more than two three weeks at any one of these houses >> and I'm just getting flipped through them.

[00:23:52]>> Well, uh I catch So I'm on probation now in Delaware County, Franklin County, and I think it's Richland County is what Lucas is in. Um, I had a F5 aiding and embedding. So, aiding and embedding is if you're with somebody in the commission of a felony. Yeah.

[00:24:10]>> If you help them further, you get the same charge. So, just like if somebody went to murder somebody, I'd catch the same charge.

[00:24:16]>> Wow.

[00:24:16]>> So, I catch an F5 embedding of stolen credit cards.

[00:24:19]>> Okay.

[00:24:20]>> I also got now I'm on felony probation here, here, here, all three of them. Um, I I still getting in trouble. I end up getting locked up from uh I I go through all these foster homes. They they're running out of places to put me. Um, so I interview with Do You guys know what Buckeye Boys Ranch is?

[00:24:37]>> Yeah, I know that. Yeah.

[00:24:38]>> So they come So I'm locked up at this time. Um, and uh, juvenile detention and they send out uh, Buckeye Boys Ranch to meet with me.

[00:24:47]>> What's that place? That's >> So it's for It's a group home is what it's for kids that can't behave in regular home settings.

[00:24:53]>> Oh, so it's just essentially another juvenile.

[00:24:56]>> It is. It is, but not You're not in jail. you're on a farm taking care of farm animals. Uh it's still locked down.

[00:25:04]It's almost like a It's almost like a West Central. It's almost like a CBC but for juveniles.

[00:25:10]>> Not based around drugs but based around uh you guys I don't >> cognitive behavioral therapy.

[00:25:15]>> Yeah. Do you thinking for a change? They used to have like classes like that.

[00:25:19]Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:25:20]>> So it's So they inter me interview me for um this Buckeye Boy's ranch. I end up going out there. It's awful. I mean, you're talking about all the worst of the worst kids. It's literally [ __ ] awful. Like, these kids are uh they're all older. Um they know where all the blind spots are. Can't wait for the younger kid to come in. I'm the youngest on the whole compound. Like, it's it's just really bad. So, um they had nowhere else for me. No other foster homes would take me just because of all this behavior issue stuff I had. Um so, fast forward, I'm only there for a couple months. they find another place for me, but it's outside the county. So, the way the foster care system works is if they have it's all off of money. So, they get so much money per kid. And the more you go outside of your county, the more it cost them.

[00:26:10]>> Okay.

[00:26:10]>> So, they find a another facility of people, it's called Kids Count 2, and they end up taking me on as a uh client.

[00:26:18]And uh they find a foster home out in it's called Ada, Ohio.

[00:26:22]>> You guys ever heard of Ada?

[00:26:23]>> No. It's out by Lima. You guys know where Lima is?

[00:26:27]>> So, I end up going there and this is like my last shot, last chance at >> I was going to say, man, they're putting you in places just I've never even [ __ ] heard of. They're just placing you wherever.

[00:26:37]>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They're they're just trying to figure it out. Exactly. Um, so yeah. So, Exactly. I've been all over I've been literally all over North Ohio like placed in the smallest to Amishville where we had no electricity to [ __ ] uh middle of nowhere. Like literally I've been all over Ohio. So um I go out to Ada Ohio and uh I'm in a foster home with a really good uh foster family. Um we have I have there's it's God I'm trying to think how many kids. maybe 10 kids there.

[00:27:15]>> What do you consider really good?

[00:27:17]>> So when I say little really good, we get like uh like they have internet there.

[00:27:22]They take us places. They uh >> So they're nice to you.

[00:27:27]>> Exactly. Nice. They're inclusive.

[00:27:30]They have priv Ex Exactly. You're not just like treat it like this [ __ ] animal.

[00:27:36]>> Exactly.

[00:27:37]>> Exactly. a paycheck where a you're not treated like a cuz it's really and it's not even always the foster care foster parents fault because they are really bound by these tight restrictions because so much rides on like you get in a car crash or something like that. Your state property is what you are. Yeah.

[00:27:54]>> If you're a foster kid, you are owned by the state like literally and so much will fall back on to them. The family can sue them. So, it's really not even just all their fault. Some of there's some piece of [ __ ] foster parents out there too. Like the the lady I end up with at first call me white boy and [ __ ] like that. She was a piece of [ __ ] Um and I went to a couple other places where they're pieces of [ __ ] but uh most of the time it's their hands are tied.

[00:28:17]>> Okay. So you end up in a good one.

[00:28:18]>> Yes, I end up in a good one. Sorry. Um I end up in a good one. Um everything's good, but I'm still, you know, I'm still from the west side of Columbus. I'm still I'm not prepared for I'm in like the suburbs. It's country suburbs is what it is. Um, and so like I'm not really hip to like I'm still I'm showing up in Coogi. I got uh 3XTS on like I'm not fitting in to what everybody everybody else is wearing American American Eagle Hollister Apostle [ __ ] like that. So I'm just like out of place.

[00:28:50]>> So the third day of school I get in a fight and like it's like a bad fight.

[00:28:54]Like especially like this school has no fights at all.

[00:28:56]>> Yeah.

[00:28:56]>> And it's like bloody everything. I end up getting my ass beat is what ended up happening. I end up fighting a senior and he uh broke my nose. And uh so things are still going okay though, but I'm suspended from school now. And uh we have a couple episodes where I act out like I'm breaking [ __ ] through the house. My foster has to restrain me.

[00:29:19]They have to lock all the kids in their rooms, everything. Well, they take me to my doctor. Uh his name was Dr. way and they find out I'm by or they'd been uh SK or thinking I was but um he diagnosed me with bipolar.

[00:29:31]>> Okay.

[00:29:31]>> They put me on lithium.

[00:29:33]>> My life completely flips from that time that uh >> in a good way.

[00:29:37]>> In a good way. Okay. Now I'm making A's, B's, and C's.

[00:29:41]>> Okay.

[00:29:41]>> I'm on the football team. I get a girlfriend. Life is going good.

[00:29:45]>> So they found the they diagnosed you.

[00:29:47]Found it. Yeah. In the first try and works.

[00:29:50]>> Yep. Was good.

[00:29:51]>> Wow. So, I'm taking taking my lithium.

[00:29:53]Life's going good. Um, everything's going good. Um, I I still uh I'm playing video games, stuff like that. Uh, life's good. Uh, when I turned 17, my mom's scheduled to be out of prison. She's getting released from prison. I'm also coming up for emancipation out of foster care.

[00:30:11]>> So, during this time, I missed this part. when I was 11. So when that very first CASA worker came after I ran away, she quit being my CASA worker. The gentleman that was on the board of CASA, he ran the he started the board of CASA.

[00:30:26]His name was Pete Wilkerson. He took me on to be one of his kids. He only had three kids on his case load.

[00:30:32]>> So me and Pete get this special bond of he's he's the only person that's consistent in my life.

[00:30:38]>> Okay.

[00:30:39]>> And he and he shows true unconditional love throughout this time. always shows up for me when I'm in ju juvenile detention. He's coming to my visits.

[00:30:48]Like he's just this pillar in my life from 11 until now I'm going on 15.

[00:30:53]>> Okay.

[00:30:53]>> And he's just been consistent all the way through this. So, um so me and Pete's still was he he wanted me to graduate high school before I left foster care. And so, um I'm on my meds, everything. My mom scheduled for me to get out of uh or my mom is scheduled to get out of prison. She gets out and I'm still in foster care, but my 18th birthday is coming up. So, I'm going to be emancipating from foster care. Um, so my 18th birthday comes, I emancipate out of foster care and my mom comes. So, at this time, my mom's selling pills again.

[00:31:26]>> So, she gets a uh apartment up in Ada.

[00:31:29]She has an apartment in Delaware and she has a house in Columbus. So, she has three different houses in three at the same time.

[00:31:35]>> At the same time.

[00:31:36]>> Damn.

[00:31:36]>> Yeah. But also, mom got her cosmetology license, so she's cutting hair, too. But she's also selling pills on the side >> and she's paying rent for all these places.

[00:31:43]>> All the places. Yep.

[00:31:44]>> Man, mom's a hustler, baby.

[00:31:45]>> Yeah. So, I'm staying up in Ada by myself. So, now I'm emancipated out of foster care. Yep.

[00:31:49]>> My deal with my mentors. I'm going to be the I'm the first person in my family that graduated.

[00:31:54]>> Okay.

[00:31:54]>> So, like or I'm I'm the I'm the first male that graduated. I'm the second person that graduated. They're uh my cousin. Uh >> what you want? High school.

[00:32:02]>> Yeah. High school.

[00:32:03]>> Okay.

[00:32:03]>> Yeah. So, >> you're the only the second in your family to graduate high school.

[00:32:06]>> Exactly.

[00:32:06]>> Damn, brother.

[00:32:07]>> Yeah. So, um, sorry, it's hard to stay on track.

[00:32:12]>> And the crazy part is like you're you're not even like addict at this point, right? This is you've lived an insane life before you even turned 18. And >> don't get me wrong, I've been smoking weed and [ __ ] like that since I was seven, eight. So, like, let me I sorry, I should have probably focused on that, too, because I'm going to talk about when my addiction really gets off the uh rails. Um, I I've been smoking weed. My my sisters and them whenever I was like three, they used to put a hat on my head and they would blow weed smoke into it.

[00:32:42]So, like this was just [ __ ] they did.

[00:32:44]>> Hot boxing at an early point in life.

[00:32:45]>> Yeah. And so, fifth grade I got kicked out for smoking weed in the school bathroom.

[00:32:49]>> Uh, got drunk with my mom on 151 when I was probably eight, seven, eight years old. So, so there there's signs of my addiction, >> but that's not really that prevalent.

[00:33:00]That's like the least of your problems back then. Yeah.

[00:33:03]>> Yeah. They don't really get to shine through because I'm not really in positions to to let them shine through because I'm >> nowhere to access these.

[00:33:11]>> So, yeah. You're 18 now. You're back.

[00:33:13]You're living in one of your mom's places, right?

[00:33:15]>> Yeah. My mom got an apartment up in Ada.

[00:33:17]Um I go off my medications. Of course, I'm not taking with you now. I'm smoking weed.

[00:33:23]>> So, this is where my addiction really starts to uh kick off.

[00:33:26]>> Why did you quit the meds?

[00:33:28]So, so there's this strange thing with uh bipolar and and for me in my case of bipolar, life's going so good, I don't need them.

[00:33:35]>> You don't need them anymore.

[00:33:36]>> Every time, dude. It happens so many time. It's happened so many times.

[00:33:40]>> Life's just going so great. I figured it out.

[00:33:43]>> Oh, it's like recovery, too. Like, my life is so good. I don't need to do this [ __ ] anymore.

[00:33:46]>> Yeah. Okay. So, life's going so good.

[00:33:48]Don't need my meds anymore.

[00:33:49]>> Yep. Now I'm smoking weed. My mom's coming up. Uh I I have a new group of friends now. Um, football season's over.

[00:33:58]I'm in this relationship, though. And, uh, so throughout this time, uh, I'm progressively getting worse. Uh, now I'm starting to dabble in pills. Um, oh, I missed another part. I'm so sorry. I got to go back here. So, before I'm out of before I emancipated out of foster care, I try heroin for the first time.

[00:34:17]>> You just tried heroin.

[00:34:18]>> So, I went on a on a visit home. My sister was living in a hotel. My oldest sister, >> man.

[00:34:23]>> She's selling heroin.

[00:34:24]>> The cheerleader sisters?

[00:34:25]>> No. No, no. This is my oldest sister, Jess.

[00:34:27]>> Okay.

[00:34:27]>> She's selling care. She's now lost everything and they're her and my three sisters are staying in a hotel room and they're trapping out of a hotel room.

[00:34:34]>> Okay.

[00:34:35]>> I'm coming home for home visits from foster care, staying in the hotel with them. And my sister I'm begging my sister to let me try heroin for the first time. She lets me I and then I'm just going back off my visits like everything's sweet.

[00:34:48]>> Oh, buddy.

[00:34:49]>> Yeah. So, my mom gets out.

[00:34:51]>> Yeah. Jesus.

[00:34:52]>> Yeah. So, I didn't fall in. I I mean, I I love the warm feeling, everything like that, but I still wasn't completely gone. Still had, you know, friends up in Ada. All this stuff was going on. So, I'm in this relationship and I'm progressively getting worse with my bipolar >> um to the point that I become very um abusive uh to my uh ex-girlfriend um to the point of I'm playing Russian roulette with her and myself with a 357 Magnum.

[00:35:20]>> No [ __ ] Like, how what's that look like? So, >> are you is like forcibly playing Russian roulette with her and >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, so my insecurities and my uh feeling of abandonment when she's going to leave me, >> I'm now holding her captive in the house.

[00:35:35]>> Okay.

[00:35:36]>> To the point of threatening to take her life.

[00:35:38]>> That's crazy, man.

[00:35:39]>> Yeah. Yeah. So, my I'm I'm sick.

[00:35:42]>> So, you put the you literally put the gun in the bullet, spun the chamber.

[00:35:45]>> Yeah. And I'm playing Russian with her with her.

[00:35:47]>> That's insane, man.

[00:35:48]>> Yeah. Not Not okay.

[00:35:50]>> No, I mean Yeah. It's just like Yeah.

[00:35:51]Jesus.

[00:35:52]>> Yeah.

[00:35:52]>> Uh, man, nothing. No click. I mean, it's all Yeah, that's >> I'm sick. I'm sick. I'm I'm literally uh my mental health is deteriorated.

[00:36:04]>> Um, time goes on. Um, eventually she So, we're supposed to be taking over this apartment that my mom had. And so, she's going to be moving back to Delaware.

[00:36:14]Gets to the point where I'm I'm so sick that I'm physically putting my hands on her. I'm beating her. So, she goes and puts a restraining order against me.

[00:36:22]>> Okay. Smart girl.

[00:36:23]>> Yeah. Absolutely. Absolutely. And I'm still doing crazy [ __ ] like showing up at her dad's place, stalking her, doing crazy [ __ ] Like, I'm sick. Um, so time goes on or whatever. I end up uh we end up going and living in I end up doing a job up in Michigan and living in Detroit and we're working uh fixing a hotel. So, I I leave. I we lose the apartment. My mom goes and picks all her stuff up.

[00:36:47]This girl has a restraining order against me. I'm doing odds and end jobs.

[00:36:50]So, I'm staying out in Detroit. One of my best friends, they come up to work with me. This is when the pills, the 30s start really taking off because in Michigan, they're so easily to get.

[00:37:00]>> Um, start, we meet these two uh Cubans up there. Uh, his wife has uh uh cancer.

[00:37:08]She's getting a script of perk sets. We start buying all the scripts of perk sets.

[00:37:14]um start going down the rabbit hole with uh with pills. We get done with that job up in Michigan. I come down to live in Delaware with my family. Well, me and my mom, so another priest I miss during this time when my mom got out, she also got with a gentleman that I literally hated. His name was Bobby. Um they got get their own place, her and Bobby does.

[00:37:38]And so me and her are now having friction and we're not talking, >> me and my mother, because now >> again, you've told me you're going to do this, this, and this. When you got prison, everything's going to be good.

[00:37:49]Now you chose another man over me again.

[00:37:51]>> So now I'm resentful. This is all going on.

[00:37:55]>> So me and my mom don't talk for I want to say about six months.

[00:37:58]>> And so I'm stay with my cousin aunt. And during this time, um, I'm just 18. Um, I get in another relationship um, in Delaware. The girl gets pregnant. I I meet her one night on New Year's Eve.

[00:38:12]She gets pregnant. I leave. I go back to my cousins. She calls me and she's like, "Hey, I'm pregnant."

[00:38:16]>> Oh, buddy.

[00:38:17]>> So, I go to stay with her because now we're going to be a happy family.

[00:38:20]>> Yeah. Kids fix everything.

[00:38:21]>> Yeah, exactly. Well, I And this is my first time meeting her.

[00:38:24]>> Yeah.

[00:38:24]>> Um, and >> the first time you hooked up with her, you got her pregnant.

[00:38:28]>> Supposedly they were my kids.

[00:38:29]>> Golly. But like what can go wrong will go wrong.

[00:38:32]>> Well, it gets real. it goes really wrong.

[00:38:34]>> So, uh, I go there, I stay with her. Um, she's in a section 8 apartment in Delaware. She's already got one kid. Um, she's pregnant with twins. Uh, I start staying with her. My cousin, uh, Bubs lives out back behind her. Me and him go out one night and we were at the strip club all night drinking. I come back there and she's like, "Pack your [ __ ] You can't stay here." Well, I got my I have a a gun on me at the time. And so, she tells me, uh, pack my [ __ ] I pull out the gun. I [ __ ] in it. I'm like, "Bitch, shut up." And so just stupid.

[00:39:07]>> Sorry. I don't mean to.

[00:39:07]>> No, I know it's not. It's awful.

[00:39:10]>> So I'm like, "Shut up. Whatever. Her kids getting ready for school. He comes in the room. I toss the gun on the bed.

[00:39:16]She leaves. I go I lay down on the bed.

[00:39:18]I'm like, "Fuck, I want some breakfast."

[00:39:19]I leave to go get McDonald's. I come back and the door's open. And so I'm like, "What the fuck?" But I left the gun at the house.

[00:39:25]>> So as I'm coming into the house, the door gets kicked back on me. And they start shouting commands. Lay down.

[00:39:31]interlock your fingers, everything. I get charged with a kidnapping, guns under disability in Delaware County.

[00:39:37]>> Damn.

[00:39:37]>> Yeah. And I just turned 18.

[00:39:39]>> You go hard, buddy.

[00:39:40]>> Well, it's Yeah.

[00:39:43]I wish I Yeah. So, I learned quickly. I I I It was It was a great lesson very early. Um, so now I'm going out for kidnapping, Guns Under Disability. Um, >> kidnapping F1, right?

[00:39:54]>> F1. Yep.

[00:39:55]>> So, that's the same as murder, but Exactly. Yeah.

[00:39:57]>> at 18. Fresh 18.

[00:39:59]>> Yeah. Fresh. Fresh 18. Jeez.

[00:40:01]>> Yeah. So, like now locked me up, they booked me. Um me and my mom had just started talking. So, her and uh my castle worker Pete, the one that I told you guys been consistent. They're my wife. They go and get a lawyer. His name's Chase Mauy, the lawyer.

[00:40:16]>> He's the one that Do you guys remember that Studeville case >> back in the day?

[00:40:20]>> No.

[00:40:20]>> The football players had raped.

[00:40:23]>> The cheerleader.

[00:40:24]>> He was their lawyer.

[00:40:25]>> He was their lawyer.

[00:40:26]>> Damn. All right. Bad luck is the prosecutor that prosecuted is the the that prosecuted that case is now my judge.

[00:40:34]>> Oh buddy.

[00:40:34]>> So we find this out later.

[00:40:36]>> So they got they got beef already.

[00:40:37]>> Yeah. Exactly.

[00:40:38]>> The lawyer and the judge.

[00:40:39]>> Exactly. So So I sit down. I'm in there for I think a little over a month, month and a half. Um and I'm fighting this case.

[00:40:48]>> What are you What are they What are you looking at? So, I mean, you could say I'm looking at if you stacked all the max penalty over 50 years.

[00:41:00]>> Okay.

[00:41:00]>> Am I actually looking at that? It's my first offense.

[00:41:03]>> Yeah.

[00:41:04]>> Technically, could I have got like caught a bad judge on a bad day? I could have got 50. Like, if I if if I'm actually taking those charges, if they don't plead me out or anything, >> is that the likelihood? No, not at all.

[00:41:15]It's my first offense. anything.

[00:41:19]I'm honestly I mean I could maybe go to prison for I could maybe go to prison, but anyways, uh we get the lawyer. He works out a plea deal. I end up pleading out to aggravated fencing. Um I have to forfeit my uh firearm. Um I think possession of marijuana because I had some possession charges as well. Um and so I get two years probation.

[00:41:40]>> Wow.

[00:41:41]>> Yeah. So So I luck out and and misdemeanor probation. They don't even give me a felony.

[00:41:46]>> Yeah. Wow.

[00:41:46]>> Lucky bastard.

[00:41:47]>> Yeah. Yeah.

[00:41:48]>> The a medicine menacing is is that felony?

[00:41:50]>> No.

[00:41:51]From the Yeah. To misdemeanor.

[00:41:53]>> Yep. So, I take an M1 is what I end up getting. So, I luck completely out. But my PO is a complete [ __ ] >> And so, he's on my ass about, you know, doing drugs or anything. So, I decided I'm going to go to South Carolina at this time. I'm I'm just gonna get away.

[00:42:07]He's like, "All right, if you you can go there, just don't ever come back." Is what he tells me. Like, you can go, just don't ever come back.

[00:42:13]>> So, let me go to South Carolina. Well, I'm doing good down there. I start doing construction. Well, now I find cocaine in South Carolina.

[00:42:21]And so I I start hanging out. Now I'm partying too long. Me and the person I'm staying with down there get into it. So now it's time for me to come back. Uh I get back um and when I get back now my mom is no longer in Delaware. She's not living with my aunt and now they've moved to full heroin. They're getting heroin from the Mexicans >> and they're getting a shitload of heroin.

[00:42:42]>> Are they are they're doing it themselves, too? Yeah, they're using, but they're also selling.

[00:42:47]>> Okay.

[00:42:47]>> So, this is when life starts to speed up into my my addiction.

[00:42:52]>> Um, so I get back from South Carolina. When I get back, they're now living on the south side of Columbus. My sister has her she's renting a place from my aunt that's not really my aunt. She owns a a duplex and my sister's living on one side and her mom's living on the other side. My mom is now staying with my aunt that's getting the dope from the Mexicans.

[00:43:14]So, long story short, um I end up getting kicked out of my sisters. I go to stay with my aunt and my mom at the house where they're getting all the dope. And I'm like, I got to do something different. Like, I I have this epiphany. I'm going to fix my life.

[00:43:28]Everything's I need to go to college.

[00:43:31]>> So, I signed up for fast because I was a ward of the state. I get free college.

[00:43:35]>> Damn.

[00:43:36]>> Yeah. Because if you emancipate from care, your parents are technically the state.

[00:43:39]>> Any college you go to?

[00:43:40]>> Uh I don't know exactly how it works out. Um, I'm guessing I don't know. I don't know if that counts for like Yale and Harvard and all these other places.

[00:43:48]>> Where you end up where'd you go?

[00:43:49]Columbus State?

[00:43:49]>> No. So, I end up going to UNOH, University of Northwestern Ohio. Okay.

[00:43:53]>> So, I don't know if that's just for state schools or something like that.

[00:43:55]I'm not sure exactly how that works.

[00:43:57]Whenever you fill out your FAFSA though, you fill it out. They have a specific place though for foster kids. Advanced paid from Care.

[00:44:03]>> Okay.

[00:44:03]>> Um, but I think it's probably all state schools. So, I have to pay no tuition, anything like that, but I'm taking extra money. So, now I got money to live on.

[00:44:11]So they're cutting me checks.

[00:44:13]>> So I get out to it's UNO AC is up in Lima.

[00:44:16]>> So I go to school there. Um I decide, you know what? I need more money. So I'm going to start selling weed. I know people in Michigan. So let me start getting weed from Michigan because it's a lot cheaper.

[00:44:26]>> Uh the girl I start messing with, she's on the softball team. She's from Michigan, from Detroit. Her cousins grow weed. So I'm like, "Okay, my roommate, he is an Asian guy from New Jersey. Lots of money." So, I put two and two together, get him to front me the money, have send the girls up to go get the weed. They go get it. I'm selling weed now. I'm the weed man on campus.

[00:44:47]>> Okay.

[00:44:48]>> So, I have them go and get me a couple pounds here and there, here and there.

[00:44:52]Well, finally I go and have them like I'm making good money at this point because I'm getting next to nothing and I'm selling to college kids that are paying top dollar. So, I finally have her go up and get me 12 pounds, but I'm only six of them are mine. Six are my other roommates, but I'm selling them to him at wholesale price, but I'm making like $200 off of each outs off of him.

[00:45:13]>> Okay.

[00:45:13]>> So, and he's taking six of them off rip.

[00:45:15]So, I've already made my money back on these six pound. Everything I'm making on these pounds is all mine.

[00:45:19]>> Smart. Yeah.

[00:45:20]>> Yeah. So, everything's good. When they get back, I'm an ounce short on my or on the 12 pounds. So, I'm like, where's this at? They go back, they put it all in their speakers, like, oh, it was stuck down here. So, it's already fishy.

[00:45:31]So the way it worked was me and my roommate that was there's two of us in a room. He went to school during the day.

[00:45:38]I went to school at night. That's I'm bipolar. I stay up at night all the time anyways. I'm not on my medication. Um so he would be so there'd always be somebody there to stay with the weed. He had left out uh the girl that I was messing with got a flat tire and he was like they called him to come change the tire. I'm in class.

[00:45:57]>> Oh no.

[00:45:58]>> I get a call in class. I just got robbed.

[00:46:01]So soon as we go on break, I like hightail over there. They done ripped my whole uh dorm room apart. They took all the weed. They took all the money. They taking everything. And that was all my reup money.

[00:46:12]>> 12 pounds of weed.

[00:46:13]>> No, I only had six because six went to my roommate.

[00:46:16]>> But I had all my the money that I made off those six >> was in my room. And none of this is money is mine.

[00:46:22]>> This money was all fronted from my roommate. So off rip, it's not mine. I was just about to make my money off these six pounds because I got his money back. Yeah.

[00:46:30]>> Off of selling the other shakes.

[00:46:32]>> Wow, bud.

[00:46:33]>> So now I'm freaking out. And so while I'm there, one of the guys that came and bought a quarter pound from me pulls up.

[00:46:39]He owed me $5 on the quarter pound. Only $5 bills. He was $5 short. He showed up to to pay me back. He showed up during the robbery, too. So why they were in the room stealing the [ __ ] He had showed up.

[00:46:52]>> So the roommate that is so there's four rooms is the way it's set up. We're here. There's another roommate here and there's two other roommates here. This kid had seen this guy during the robbery. So he tells me, "No, there's a black guy here. He was." So I'm like, "Come in here." The dude that's $5 short. I'm like, "Come in here."

[00:47:08]>> He thought it was him.

[00:47:09]>> I did. So I'm already in my mind. So I'm like, "Is this the dude that it was?"

[00:47:13]He's like, "Yeah, he's the one that was here."

[00:47:15]>> So I go to get around him to punch dude and he pulls out a pistol and sticks in my face >> on campus.

[00:47:21]>> So now they're calling campus security.

[00:47:24]Everything's going back. I'm getting on the phone with my mom because I don't know what the [ __ ] to do. Now's campus security's coming. I'm out of all these whatever. And she's like, "Listen, just say that you had money in there.

[00:47:32]Somebody broke in, stole the money.

[00:47:34]Like, if there's no weed in there, uh, possession signs of the law. Like, you ain't got to be worried about it." So, I sit down on the curb and I'm waiting on campus security to pull up. Dude swoops back around. He's trying to explain to me like, I had nothing to do with I showed up to pay you. Campus security surrounds him.

[00:47:49]>> They get out and when they do, they go to stop him. He hits one of the officer and takes off.

[00:47:54]>> So now they send sheriff's department.

[00:47:56]This thing blows all the way up out of proportion. I'm on I'm on probation though. Now this aggravated menacing.

[00:48:02]>> So now I'm worried my PO is going to find out.

[00:48:04]>> This is going to go left. I'm [ __ ] sweating bullets.

[00:48:09]>> Long story short, he ends up going to jail. The dude that they find the weed in his car. They find the gun in his car. He goes to jail.

[00:48:15]>> So it was him after all.

[00:48:16]>> It was not him.

[00:48:17]>> No, >> it was not. It was the girls that >> went to get the weed, the the volleyball girls, and they end up being from the west side of Columbus. So, we're we're from the same side of town. Had no idea.

[00:48:27]But they sent the the African-American girl sent the white girls over to break into my apartment >> and he just happened to come to drop off the money to me that he owed us >> during then they when she was staying spending the night with me, she went in middle of the night and unlocked the window. They cut the uh they cut the >> screen and came through the window.

[00:48:45]>> It's how they got it.

[00:48:47]>> Wow, buddy. So, long story short, so now now my PO is going to find out. My PO finds out now that I'm back from South Carolina. He thinks I'm still in South Carolina.

[00:48:56]>> Now I I got to come see him. He wants to know what's going on. I get expelled from UNO. Now I'm not going to school there.

[00:49:02]>> So now it's time for me to come back to Columbus.

[00:49:05]>> Here's where my addiction is going to uh take off real bad. Um I get back here.

[00:49:10]Um while I was up there, you know, I was doing a little bit of partying and stuff. Uh he drug test me. I fell for um Xanax for benzo or not benzo.

[00:49:19]>> Yeah, benzo diaphragm or whatever. So now I go to my mental health doctor. I'm like, "Hey, I need my lithium." And I also have been prescribed Xanax for all this time. I'm a college student. They have nothing to think of it. They just give it to me, my Xanax. So now I'm selling my Xanax.

[00:49:34]Get back here. Um my mom is my mom and them's uh selling dope, like lots of dope. Um so that they're they're selling heroin. Um, I'm halfass foot trying to do the right thing and getting high at the same time. So, I'm working, you know, at Goodwill and I end up working at Jify Lube, but I'm still getting high on the side. Not strong out though.

[00:49:56]Heroin was not my I liked heroin. I like opiates, but heroin did not really get me there.

[00:50:02]>> Okay.

[00:50:03]>> Fetty comes around. Fetty is when I really fall in love. Just that punch that that that initial knockout blow.

[00:50:09]>> Exactly. That's when I I fall in love is Fetty. So Fetty starts showing up. I think this is 2019.

[00:50:18]2018 2019 first time I they call it FET is what they were calling it at first.

[00:50:22]Yeah.

[00:50:22]>> So everybody's calling it FET.

[00:50:24]>> I love FET.

[00:50:26]>> And so um there's a dude that was in Delaware. He could get it, but we had to go to the east side of Columbus to get it. And I go downhill quickly. I thought my mom's now I'm staying with my grandma's. I OD at my grandma's.

[00:50:36]>> Your everyday habit now?

[00:50:38]>> Now every single day. Every chance. I'm still still kind of working a job. IV drug use.

[00:50:43]>> Nope. Snorting.

[00:50:43]>> Snorting only.

[00:50:44]>> Snorting only. That's it. And I'm staying in uh at my grandma's OD for the first time though.

[00:50:51]>> Ah, poor grandma. Grandma find you?

[00:50:53]>> So my cousin found me and but they had to do CPR. They had to push open the door. Ambulance comes. My grandma kicks me out the house. Yeah. So it's my first time oding.

[00:51:05]>> Actually, no. This my second time ODing.

[00:51:06]First time I ODed ever. I ODed on Suboxin.

[00:51:10]>> You guys ever heard of that?

[00:51:11]>> Yeah. How does that happen?

[00:51:12]>> I did not even know it could happen.

[00:51:13]>> I didn't know that was a thing either.

[00:51:14]>> I smoked weed and took a sub. I had my own apartment.

[00:51:17]>> You took just ASAB.

[00:51:18]>> ASU. I snorted it. No, I snorted a half a sub.

[00:51:21]>> The pills, the orange pills.

[00:51:22]>> Yeah. Yeah. And ODed.

[00:51:24]>> I ODed.

[00:51:24]>> That's crazy.

[00:51:25]>> Fell out. Yep.

[00:51:26]>> First time I ever ODed. But they didn't know it was overdose because I had no prior drug. I had nothing documented as drug >> use. Yeah.

[00:51:33]>> And I I don't know if it was just so far back they weren't checking for uh Suboxin at the time for bup. I'm not sure if that's >> probably going for all like the usual suspects, you know, like crack, heroin, all that.

[00:51:44]>> So, it was never even deter. Nobody had still known that that had been overdose, but that was my first actual overdose.

[00:51:50]>> Um, thankfully, the girl I was messing with at the time found me and she had kicked in my window and called EMS.

[00:51:56]>> So, this is my second time overdosing and so things are going to go downhill quickly. Um, so my my grandmother finds me overdosed. She kicks me out. So, now I'm homeless. So now I'm running the streets. So um I'm like I'm going to go to treatment. I'm going to go to Mary Haven. So they sent me to Mary Haven um on Alen Creek Drive.

[00:52:16]>> Okay. You did residential over there.

[00:52:18]>> No, it wasn't residential at the time.

[00:52:19]This was still detox at the time. They didn't have residential wasn't on South High at the time.

[00:52:23]>> They had two wings is what it was. They had the Coleman. Yep. Is it Paulman?

[00:52:28]>> Paul Coleman. Yep. They had Paul Coleman on one side. They had the detox on the other side. So, um, I'm there for probably four days trying to detox off this fetti and [ __ ] my ego gets the best of me. A dude calls me a [ __ ] >> Oh, boy. Here we go.

[00:52:43]>> Yeah. So, I'm like, >> all of a sudden, you got to >> we got to go to the Let's go to the bathroom. Yeah. Well, >> we go to the bathroom. Or no, no, no, no. I called him a [ __ ] That's what it was. He He was not his ego.

[00:52:54]>> He his ego. Yeah. I called him a [ __ ] And he >> said he was from Italy and be calling him a [ __ ] All this other stuff. So anyways, we go to the bathroom. I punch this dude and he [ __ ] hits his head off of the uh sink and goes unconscious or having a seizure.

[00:53:08]>> You have a history of that, bud? Like just [ __ ] hitting people. They fall into things and knock themselves out.

[00:53:13]>> Knocked themselves.

[00:53:13]>> Well, yeah. That was the teacher. She fell and hit her. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:53:16]Yeah. Yeah. She Yeah. This is Yeah.

[00:53:18]>> bad luck.

[00:53:19]>> Well, this there's a lot of things that become common occurrences in my life. Um >> they get tossed out of there, I'm assuming, right?

[00:53:25]>> So So So yeah, I go AMA. I I didn't get on my [ __ ] I'm so scared they're going to call the cops. I'm going to catch a charge from this.

[00:53:32]>> So I [ __ ] as soon as they were doing construction on the building, so they had one of the doors propped. Soon as they opened the door, I just took off out of it. I left all my [ __ ] there, everything.

[00:53:41]>> Um, so now my brother comes and picks me up. My brother just got out of prison.

[00:53:46]>> My brother is going through integrative services and they're paying his month.

[00:53:49]He's living on the west side. So I'm like, "Fuck it. I'm going to the west side. Awful idea. This is where things are just going to go downhill much quicker."

[00:53:57]>> I don't think you've ever had an uphill in your life, buddy.

[00:53:59]>> Yeah.

[00:54:01]That's I do now, but >> Jeez.

[00:54:04]>> Yeah.

[00:54:05]>> Yeah. So, I go to the west side. Uh we start saying a warn out west um on on the hill.

[00:54:11]>> And um during this time, uh you know, dope is readily available all over the west side. Find out about testers if you go up to the corner stores.

[00:54:22]>> Love being the tester, man.

[00:54:23]>> Yeah. You get testers sitting at the corner stores. Um, so life start starts to go or addiction starts to go very rapidly. Um, but during this time I'm still I I would get so strung out and I'd be uh I'd still have his place to come back to, but I'm running the west side. I'd go to try to go to treatment again. So I'd go in and out of treatments. Um, so like I was telling you, I was at Lighthouse. Um, I don't have timelines completely lined up, but I'm going in and out of treatment back to addiction, back to the west side.

[00:54:55]kind of just like foster care. Um, I end up at Lighthouse and I get in a relationship or I do decent. Um, I start talking to my mom again. She buys me a new pair of tennis shoes. I get in a relationship with one of the I don't know if she's the counselor, care coordinator or something. Um, >> an employee of the treatment center you're at.

[00:55:13]>> Exactly. The employee of the treatment center.

[00:55:16]>> We get in a relationship. Um, I get caught sneaking out and staying with her in her car.

[00:55:21]>> She doesn't get caught though.

[00:55:23]>> Okay. So she comes, they knock me back down to phase zero and I'm up at phase three. So I'm like, there's no [ __ ] way. I'm not I've done all this work.

[00:55:30]I'm not going back.

[00:55:32]>> She takes me to straight to the west side. Me and her end up, you know, staying together. Um well, she tries to commit suicide during this time.

[00:55:40]>> The your >> Wow.

[00:55:42]>> case man, whatever the employee of the treatment center you're at.

[00:55:44]>> Yeah.

[00:55:45]>> How does she try to do it?

[00:55:46]>> So So me and So I end up relapsing.

[00:55:49]>> Yeah.

[00:55:50]>> And I tell her I relapse. She's like, "I can't go back to that." And so then she I don't know if she was feeling guilty that I relapsed. I don't know exactly what was going through her head. She takes a whole bunch of pills and her mom finds her in her bathroom. She's not answering my phone calls.

[00:56:03]>> So I start freaking out. I go up to Lighthouse trying to get a hold of her.

[00:56:06]>> Oh.

[00:56:07]>> So everything comes out that we were in a relationship every So this just goes downhill. Yeah.

[00:56:12]>> She loses her job, everything. Because I haven't heard from her. So then she ends up pulling up on me after she gets out the mental health hospital and she brings me like my clothes. I had her holding. So, remember the PUA money?

[00:56:23]>> So, everybody got the, you know, the PUA money. Yeah. She had some of my money in her bank account because I I got my or it was the stimulus checks at the time.

[00:56:31]I had one of my stimulus checks went to her bank account. So, she bought me like $600 that was left in her account. It's the last time I ever seen her.

[00:56:38]>> So, long story short, I'm still going in and out of treatment. Still running the west side. I'm trying to get clean or maybe it's just cold out and I'm trying to get somewhere to stay warm. Um, so I'm going in and out of treatment.

[00:56:50]um during this time. Uh but the during this time it's getting worse and worse.

[00:56:56]Starting to now shoot heroin. I'm not just snorting heroin anymore.

[00:57:01]>> Um I'm now living on the street. I'm no longer welcomed at my brother's house.

[00:57:05]I'm now living in homeless camps. Like I'm living down off of Central Avenue, right off the train tracks, >> like tent city.

[00:57:12]>> Exactly. We're living by the train tracks. So CPD can't [ __ ] with us because this is railroad land and you got to get the railroad people to come tell us to move.

[00:57:22]>> Yeah.

[00:57:22]>> And eventually they do and they tear down our whole [ __ ] camp and I lose everything again.

[00:57:27]>> Um and so so I'm not proud of this at all, but one of the things that I honestly uh if you ask anybody that's ever got high with me anything, I I've overdosed over a hundred times. Like I literally think I can get documented overdose. Not just people narcing me. Like this is going to the hospital. Like I honestly think I can get the Guinness World Record for like most overdoses. Yeah.

[00:57:51]>> Let's go, Guinness. Get out here.

[00:57:52]>> Yeah, I know. I'm dead ass. Like I literally have so many like my mom used to say I was allergic to the [ __ ] >> like cuz I was just I just fall out. Um so anyways, my point to this is uh we get to the point of telling you about me overdosing.

[00:58:07]>> Um I end up overdosing here out west. I end up at Doctor's West. I end up on a uh ventilator.

[00:58:13]>> Ventilator. Exactly. Um I had uh swallowed puke. What's that called?

[00:58:17]Whenever you're >> aspirated.

[00:58:18]>> Aspirated. Yep. Vomit and they put me on a ventilator.

[00:58:22]>> Um I go to go stay with my mom because now she's feeling like you're going to die if you stay out there. So, but I I still now mind you, my sisters are still getting high. So, I go to stay with her.

[00:58:33]I call my sister. I'm like, "Bring me some dope." She brings me some dope. She comes to see my mom. She brings me a little bit of dope. I end up falling out of her house. So my sister has to bring Narcan there. Please bud.

[00:58:43]>> So my mom kicks me out of her house cuz she's trying to So >> your mom who sells heroin?

[00:58:48]>> Well, so at this point she's fullfledged addiction.

[00:58:51]>> Okay. So your mom who is an addict.

[00:58:52]>> So my aunt got hit by SWAT. She goes to prison.

[00:58:55]>> They catch her with like 75 ounces and she a whole bunch of money, hundreds of thousands of dollars.

[00:59:01]>> She's in prison at this time. So now the taroin is dried up. Now my mom was smoking crack at first and now she's now doing fetty.

[00:59:10]So my mom's like, "You can't be here."

[00:59:12]Because during this time, my mom had overdosed. My mom had custody of all my nephews and nieces because my sisters were in addiction. And so she lost when she overdosed, she lost custody of my nephews and nieces.

[00:59:24]>> So during this time, she's trying to get custody back of my nephews and nieces.

[00:59:29]So she kicks me out the house that night. The next morning, now I'm staying with my sister and it's about 2 miles away from each other up in Delaware. So my sister brought Narcan, but they brought me back with water and everything else before they needed the Narcan. So my sister comes picks me up.

[00:59:44]She takes me to where she's staying.

[00:59:45]Next morning, my sister is blowing up her boyfriend's phone at the time. His name was Tone. And she's like, "Tell Chase to bring the Narcan." My mom had overdosed on the dope she took from me.

[00:59:55]>> Oh.

[00:59:56]>> So I [ __ ] have to run a [ __ ] two miles. I'm running literally with the Narcan and puking cuz I'm so out of shape. [ __ ] vomiting as I'm running with an arc can to take to my sister to hit my mom.

[01:00:09]>> Yeah.

[01:00:09]>> So, I get there. My sister had to climb up on the roof and go through the upstairs window. So, she has I'm calling her to come down to unlock the downstairs door. She unlocks it. I get up there. My mom's butt naked. [ __ ] I have to narcan her. I have to carry her, put her in the >> uh tub. She shits all over herself.

[01:00:26]Like, cuz you know the narcan you instant withdraw.

[01:00:28]>> Yeah. And I and also I want to say like when you withdraw and you get woke up by EMS is the worst feeling.

[01:00:34]>> The narcan of Yeah. then waking up with faces looking down on you.

[01:00:37]>> Yes. And just knowing I [ __ ] up again.

[01:00:40]Oh my god. Like it is >> I always think it's the cops when I wake up and then like it takes me a second to realize like, okay, >> I might have a shot of not going to jail.

[01:00:48]>> Awful, dude. Most just oh my like I did it again. Like how [ __ ] stupid am I?

[01:00:54]It's the worst feeling.

[01:00:55]>> Um >> does mom wake up?

[01:00:57]>> Yeah. So mom gets up. She's in the bathtub. Um, but she can't her legs are [ __ ] up. She can't really walk. Um, and so they're going to the hospital.

[01:01:07]And so I'm now searching my mom's house for this dope. I know I got a half a grand because at this time I'm getting PUA money. So I got money coming in that's not legitimate, but I'm still I still have money coming in on this card.

[01:01:20]So I'm buying decent amounts when I'm getting it.

[01:01:22]>> Okay.

[01:01:22]>> So I know there's a half a gram in this house somewhere. I need to find it because I know she didn't do the whole half gram in the six hours I've been gone.

[01:01:30]>> Yeah.

[01:01:30]>> So, I start searching her whole house. I find it on a plate in her upstairs.

[01:01:35]>> Good for you for finding it.

[01:01:36]>> Well, I'm just going to do it.

[01:01:38]>> Yeah, obviously.

[01:01:39]>> Yeah. So, I'm geeked. Uh, so they take her to the hospital. I stay there for a couple days. Hi. I got my phone. Um, she gets back and she was like [ __ ] up after this overdose. Um, so I don't I I don't know if it was like not enough oxygen, but one of the things that started happening was she was seeing like um things that weren't there. Um, I'm not sure I'm not sure exactly what it done to her, but she wasn't right after this overdose. Um, so during this time, uh, I go back to Columbus and now I'm staying with my other sister, Danny, and we're staying in this lady's house, man, Miss Loretta.

[01:02:20]It's a hoarder house. And she called us one night and she tells us like all you guys have is each other. Like you guys and like it was just weird the way she was talking to us. It was almost like she knew she was gonna die. Like it's what it felt like. Your mom. My mom.

[01:02:34]Yeah. She's talking to me and my sister because we would always be at it cuz we're fighting over dope and we're fighting over this and like she just had like this talk with us about like you guys are you guys have each other only each other. Like nobody else gives a [ __ ] about you guys. Like you guys need to look out for each other. And like at that time though we didn't really look at it that way. And uh so my sister Jess and my sister Sam, they were the closest with my mom at this time. They're the ones helping her get dope because they're in active addiction as well.

[01:03:01]>> They both get locked up within a day of each other.

[01:03:04]>> Oh man.

[01:03:04]>> So my sister Jess was like really looking after my mom and she knew my mom was going to like OD if she wasn't there. And so she's locked up at the time and me and my sister Danny are running the streets. And uh my I talked to my mom the night she died. Uh she called me and we had like this she was like if you don't do something different you're going to end up in prison. Like you're going to you're going to [ __ ] around. You're going to find out like you're going to go to prison. And like I was like all right I'll call you. I mind you I got dope I'm getting ready to do I'm waiting to get off the phone. Like I can't wait to get off the phone.

[01:03:38]>> And so I hang up and I'm staying with my brother and his girl at her grandma's.

[01:03:43]And so I'm up in this room or whatever.

[01:03:45]I fall asleep. I did my dope. I fall asleep. I wake up the next morning. My phone's blowing up. Everybody's been calling me. And so, first person I call is my aunt Lisa. Like me and my aunt Lisa, we've been tight. Um, and so she called me and she was like, "Uh, where you at?" And I was like, "I'm at West.

[01:04:02]What's up?" She's like, "I'm coming to get you." I'm like, "You can't come [ __ ] get me?" Like, she's up in Delaware.

[01:04:06]>> Yeah. Yeah.

[01:04:07]>> I'm like, "You can't come get me?" And she was like, "Uh, what are you doing?"

[01:04:10]I was like, "My dance." And she's like, I can't remember exactly how she said it, but she pretty much told my mom's dead. Like, they found her mom's when she's dead.

[01:04:18]>> Mhm.

[01:04:19]>> And like I [ __ ] just I don't even know. Like I just first I was like in this this disbelief at first. Um yeah, I was in disbelief and then I was angry at her. Like there's just all these emotions. Well, my my brother's girlfriend got Xanax, so I ate a whole bunch of Xanax. just didn't want to deal with this [ __ ] But before I ate the Xanax, we had to go find my sister Danny to let her know.

[01:04:45]>> Oh, >> cuz I'm blowing her phone up. She's not answering. So, we drive to Miss Loretta's house, which is also out west.

[01:04:50]And we go and she's [ __ ] knocked out in the basement, and we wake her up and tell her. And she's like in discombelief.

[01:04:59]I leave there, I eat a whole bunch of XY. I'm out for the rest of the day. I don't I don't even remember the whole rest of that day. And so like now we're trying to figure out like how we're going to bury her everything because we're all adult dope fiends.

[01:05:10]>> Yeah.

[01:05:11]>> So my aunt starts a GoFundMe and uh whole bunch of people from my past from you know foster care. People that just been in my life they donated money. A whole bunch of people donating money. We get enough to bury her. Um during this time though uh my sisters are in jail. So now we got to figure out how to get them out. So you guys know what a furlow is?

[01:05:31]>> Yeah.

[01:05:31]>> Yeah. Like what's >> Yeah. Yeah, they give him a furlow to come to my mom's >> funeral.

[01:05:36]>> Yeah, to go to my mom's funeral.

[01:05:39]>> So, we get everything arranged. Uh, everything's going good. Mind you, at this time though, I'm actively suicide or I'm passively suicidal. Not that I'm going to kill myself. I just I'm doing so much. I'm shooting meth, heroin, crack, all in one shot, everything. I I don't give a [ __ ] if I die. Like, I see no reason of living. And so, like, I'm literally just like so gone. And uh thankfully my uncle Butch, he came and picked me up from the west side and he took me until Mah's funeral. He was, it's gonna sound right or wrong, but he was making sure I had enough dope every day not to be sick.

[01:06:13]>> Yeah. But not >> to make it to my Exactly. Okay.

[01:06:16]>> Just to just to get to my mom's funeral.

[01:06:18]>> Okay.

[01:06:18]>> So, every day I'm staying with him.

[01:06:20]We're going to the dope man. He's putting everything on a on a plate for me to make sure I have I'm not sick.

[01:06:25]>> Yep.

[01:06:26]>> Until we can make it to this funeral.

[01:06:28]The day of the funeral, I'm on my way to Delaware to go to my mom's gonna be buried up here because this is where she died. And we find out uh the detectives because mind you, my two sisters are in jail getting furlows to come out. Me and my sister Danny both have active warrants. So, we're on the run.

[01:06:45]>> So, my sister Danny calls me and she's like, "The [ __ ] detectives called uh Mimi and uh our aunt Janette. They called and asked where the funeral's going to be. They're gonna get us tomorrow at mom's funeral.

[01:06:57]>> Damn.

[01:06:58]>> Yeah. So they're >> That's a dirty move, bro. Come get you to the funeral.

[01:07:02]>> Yeah. So So now I'm like, "Give me I'm in overdo now." So I get me the [ __ ] out of Del. So I make my aunt Lisa. I'm like, "Drive me to Columbus." Like I'm I'm not going to my mom's funeral. Like I'm me the [ __ ] out of here. She's driving halfway down 23 when my cousin Chelsea ends up meeting us and I get in the back of her car and I hide in the back of her car. My sister Danny never comes to the funeral. My other two sisters are out on furlow.

[01:07:23]Go to the funeral. I'm hiding in the back of the car waiting to see if any cops show up, anything. Well, I'm like halfway through the funeral. Nobody's showing up. So, I get out the car. I end up going to my mom's funeral. We're getting drunk at the funeral. Um and then my cousin leaves and she comes pulling back up like [ __ ] flying up.

[01:07:40]She like the [ __ ] sheriffs are outside of the So, they got it blocked off >> the cemetery.

[01:07:44]>> Yeah. So, there's only one exit to come out this [ __ ] cemetery.

[01:07:47]>> Yeah. It's off of 23.

[01:07:48]>> Who comes to arrest somebody at the funeral, bud?

[01:07:51]>> So, I start freaking out, dude. So, I [ __ ] jump in some girl's car I don't even know. She's not even my family.

[01:07:56]Anything. Uh, they end up [ __ ] get me out of there. Uh, but it's shortlived.

[01:08:02]So, side quest. My sister's on our on furlow. One goes back, the other one goes on the run.

[01:08:08]>> Never shows back up from furlow.

[01:08:10]>> I go to We all end up, long story short, we all end up in jail together. Me, Danny, Jess, and Sam, we're all in the same jail at the same time.

[01:08:18]>> This is where our recovery is going to start. Um, so I don't know how you guys are in pieces together. Sorry, I've missed so many pieces, but I hope I'm doing all right.

[01:08:28]>> Um, so we all end up in jail and I'm like, "Okay, I'm going to get clean.

[01:08:33]This is what I'm going to do." Um, so I end up going to uh Portmith, Ohio to go get clean.

[01:08:40]>> Okay.

[01:08:40]>> And uh my sister Jess, she goes to CBCF, but the one out in West Central, the one out in Mary'sville. my other two sisters, they uh I don't remember where they end up going. They're still getting high running the streets. So, I go to treatment down in Port Smith and while I'm there, I meet another counselor. We leave or we go back to her house. Her boyfriend is also a counselor at the same place. He catches us in bed together. He ends up she takes me brings me back to Columbus or No, she didn't bring me to Columbus.

[01:09:13]She we and her running around. He ends up OD and dying while we're together.

[01:09:16]Mhm. Mm- >> She brings me back to Columbus. She's out running the streets doing whatever.

[01:09:20]So, I'm back on the west side now. So, I'm out there probably a month and [ __ ] is just so bad cuz now I have nobody to call. I'm nobody to lean on. I have nobody to um uh what is that called? Whenever somebody enabler, I have no enabler now.

[01:09:41]My mom was my person. My sisters are my people. I now have none of these people.

[01:09:45]I'm out here running the streets completely on my own. Um, so I'm like, "Fuck it." I run from I I actually What happens is I go to a trap to get dope and they're like, "We just cooked crack.

[01:09:58]Do you want to try some?" Like, "Do you want to test her?" Like, it's fired. I hit it and I instantly ears ringing. I'm paranoid instantly. [ __ ] I leave out the house. I start zigzagging through the houses from the West Bro to Solivant to West Bro to Sullivant, back and forth. I'm freaking out thinking that the cops are trying to get me. I end up storing all my dope and then I'm trying to get it all out cuz I think I'm going to overdose.

[01:10:20]>> Oh man.

[01:10:20]>> I run all the way from the hill down to the bottoms uh to net care. I check myself in net care because I'm not scared. Um they send me out to uh Toledo, Ohio and to a treatment facility called Midwest Recovery. Um I get end up getting there. Mind you, I've been in and out of treatment. I never worked the steps though. This whole time I've never worked the steps. I've always been smarter than. I'm known better than y >> I I I gotta figure it out. I can do this some other way. Nobody's going to tell me I I I I'm smarter than everybody here. I get there and I'm just like literally I show up there on a gurnie.

[01:10:59]They take me to the wrong building with all the people that have like six months clean.

[01:11:02]>> All the people doing good >> and I'm getting weled through them all.

[01:11:05]I'm so [ __ ] embarrassed. And I'm just like seriously so sick and at my rock bottom. Um, so I get there, they take me to the detox part. Uh, they get me in there. Um, I get clean. I go to the 30-day rest. It was recommended for me to do the 30-day impatient rep.

[01:11:26]>> You actually were open to that idea.

[01:11:27]>> Finally, usually it was straight to I'm going straight to sober living.

[01:11:31]>> I'm not doing my 30 days.

[01:11:33]>> So, I go there. Mind you though, none of my family knows I'm here. I didn't I I feel like I have nobody. I my cousins, all them people, nobody matters. So my they're they're actively searching the west side, putting out missing pictures for me.

[01:11:47]>> Mhm.

[01:11:47]>> So there's pictures up at the Valero, the all over West Brod, all over Sullivan. They got their phone number, putting out rewards for me. I finally call home and call my aunt Lisa, the one that I've always had a bomb with.

[01:11:59]>> So I call her and she's like, "We thought you're dead. Like you're missing. Everybody's been searching for you." And so I don't know why, but I man I just I really wanted to do something differently this time. And so while I was there I'm first off I couldn't accept that I was powerless over drugs and alcohol. I couldn't understand I couldn't accept this was a disease. This was a conscious choice I was making. I couldn't understand how my brain was working. I didn't understand I was being hijacked.

[01:12:28]So I had to really really understand the first step before I could even make any progress in these steps. So, I'm doing a whole bunch of research on YouTube and I came across this lady. Her name is Dr. Nicole Labor. You guys ever watch her thing?

[01:12:39]>> We literally just had her here last last week.

[01:12:42]>> Get the [ __ ] out of here. How am I not seen? I watch all your guys' [ __ ] >> Yeah. Literally just came Yeah. last week.

[01:12:47]>> No, you guys didn't.

[01:12:48]>> Yep.

[01:12:48]>> That's dope, dude. She was like my like goto.

[01:12:51]>> She's a brilliant lady.

[01:12:52]>> She's the dope dude. What?

[01:12:54]>> Very smart.

[01:12:55]>> Yeah. Well, she has a video up on YouTube, >> Addiction 101.

[01:12:58]>> Yeah. And she breaks it down. And I could finally like understand like what my brain was doing to me.

[01:13:04]>> Yep.

[01:13:04]>> That's crazy. I didn't even know you guys had her on here.

[01:13:06]>> Yeah.

[01:13:07]>> Damn, that's dope. Sorry. I'm just like geeked out right now. I wish wish I'd have known this before.

[01:13:12]>> Yeah. Check it out. It's a good episode.

[01:13:14]>> I'm going to I'm going to My bad. I didn't know I didn't know you guys had her.

[01:13:18]>> Yeah.

[01:13:18]>> She was the one that like finally I accepted that I'm powerless like once I put this in my body. And so it allowed me then to start working these steps.

[01:13:27]And so I get there uh whole God did a whole bunch of things for me at this time though. Uh I got very close to one of the workers there.

[01:13:35]>> You better stop getting close to workers, brother.

[01:13:37]>> No. No. This was a male.

[01:13:38]>> Okay. So that's your male work.

[01:13:41]>> Fault dog.

[01:13:41]>> No. Yeah. No. Exactly. This was a male worker. And uh during this time he had moved jobs and he was able to become my sponsor.

[01:13:49]>> Okay.

[01:13:50]>> So he started working through the steps with me and started just you know not only that he was taking me to all kinds of things like he He was um they have a saying in aa lead by uh what is it they wanted to show it to you.

[01:14:06]>> Uh do as I say not as I do.

[01:14:10]>> Yeah. But it's there's a saying in anyways he made it appetizing to be sober.

[01:14:15]>> Okay.

[01:14:15]>> Like him and all of his fringe groups, the things they were doing.

[01:14:19]>> Attraction rather than promotion.

[01:14:20]>> Exactly. Attraction rather Thank you.

[01:14:22]Attraction rather than promotion. It was very attractive to be sober and clean and I wanted to do the things they wanted they were doing. And so as I worked through these steps and I, you know, made my amends, um, I was doing really good, relationship came, a girl I met in treatment >> years before. Um, >> we meet, it's actually my wife right now.

[01:14:46]>> Yeah. So, we do good, but if we fall off for a second, >> uh, we meet and, uh, I don't know at the time she's still using. Um, I have a bad day. I was I was always on my [ __ ] like meaning like I was always I was never out doing no [ __ ] I was always either going to a meetings, whatever. I come into uh into uh, sober living and one of the guys is just on my ass. I'm like, "Bro, I'm not out here [ __ ] around. like why are you on my like [ __ ] it I'm leaving like literally like just an instant like I was just like done like and so I call her I'm like come get me >> I [ __ ] overdosed with her >> [ __ ] literally less than 24 hours outside of treatment. Y I've overdosed on her twi or three times I overdose on her >> and so in the midst of one of the overdoses uh the uh I get sent to uh inatient mental health facility uh on the west side of Columbus. It's an awful awful place. I can't think of what the place is called right now.

[01:15:45]>> CDC.

[01:15:47]>> It's uh >> Twin Valley.

[01:15:48]>> No, it's not Twin Valley, but it's right off of Green Lawn. Uh >> I don't know.

[01:15:53]>> It's a lockdown facility. I'm I'm there on a pink slit and she's on her way to jail.

[01:15:57]>> Oh golly, buddy.

[01:15:58]>> Yeah.

[01:15:59]>> Yeah.

[01:16:00]>> Well, during this time though, I still made all this progress. I knew I didn't want to use. I knew. So, while she was locked up, so I get released from there.

[01:16:06]I go to stay with my brother and I'm like, I don't. She starts calling home and I'm like, I don't want to use anymore. Like, I don't want to do this.

[01:16:13]Like, I've done so much. She's like, I don't want to use anymore.

[01:16:16]>> So, I'm putting the little bit of money that I get from selling my food stamps on the phone. like I'm doing the littlest bit but just to be able to communicate with her.

[01:16:25]>> And so I'm like whenever you get out I want to go to IOP when you get out. So she gets out she gets released. My brother takes me to Columbus. We meet her mom. She comes down to stay with me in Athens.

[01:16:34]>> During this time we start going to IOP.

[01:16:37]We're going to classes every week. We start working a minimum wage job and like we're just happy to have a little paycheck, little bit of food stamps that we're getting.

[01:16:46]>> And we just start saving up, saving up, saving up. We finally get our own place.

[01:16:50]I go get my peer support certification.

[01:16:52]She's uh we've had now our uh we have one son. He's two. We have a second son on the way. He'll be here uh God.

[01:17:01]February.

[01:17:03]>> March. March. No, we're in March, right?

[01:17:06]Yeah. Got a 12 month.

[01:17:08]>> Yeah. Turn. Good for her.

[01:17:09]>> Sorry. Yeah. In May, we'll have our second sign. Um life's really good now.

[01:17:14]Uh I work in the field.

[01:17:16]>> How long have you got clean now? So, it's been four and a half almost five years. I think uh 2021 is when I got clean.

[01:17:26]>> It's almost five.

[01:17:26]>> Yeah. Almost five years. Congrats.

[01:17:28]>> Bravo, sir.

[01:17:28]>> Yeah. Yeah.

[01:17:29]>> Well done.

[01:17:30]>> And then now you ironically enough work in one of the places that you ventured through in your time.

[01:17:36]>> Exactly.

[01:17:36]>> Isn't that weird how that works out?

[01:17:38]>> Yeah. It's cool.

[01:17:39]>> Like if you would have asked you then, like >> I'd like bros, you're tripping. You're tripping, man. Yeah.

[01:17:44]>> Yeah. No, especially just in the place I work. It was like almost like outlandish. It wasn't like a regular treatment facility. It's like there's no way ever.

[01:17:52]>> All three of us have done that full circle thing.

[01:17:55]>> That's crazy.

[01:17:56]>> Or worked where we were locked up or institutionalized.

[01:18:00]>> It's insane. And it's so different from being on the other side.

[01:18:03]>> Yeah.

[01:18:03]>> Just look at like this is like almost like a it's almost like unreal. It makes me appreciate like or makes me Yeah.

[01:18:10]Just like I used to be that person. I'm like thank God I'm not anymore. Yeah, >> it's a good it's a good like slap in the face of like I can just make one dumb decision and I'm I'm that guy again.

[01:18:21]>> It really is that quickly.

[01:18:22]>> That quick. Yeah.

[01:18:23]>> For sure.

[01:18:23]>> Um >> yeah, that's crazy. So, yeah, five years clean, got a kid on the way.

[01:18:28]>> Uh decent job. Yep.

[01:18:29]>> Decent place to live.

[01:18:31]>> Yep.

[01:18:31]>> Congrats.

[01:18:32]>> Yeah, that's amazing, brother. Amazing.

[01:18:34]>> Appreciate it.

[01:18:35]>> Yeah, >> I missed some stuff in there. Sorry. I I've never done my leave.

[01:18:39]>> It's hard to It's hard to tell your story and make it make sense.

[01:18:41]>> I'm sweating. Yeah. So, >> thanks for taking the time to come on.

[01:18:44]appreciate you guys.

[01:18:45]>> Yeah, congratulations, brother. Your life has been a [ __ ] since go, you know that, right? Like I mean, you didn't have a good start nor a good middle.

[01:18:54]>> Uh but like good for you for even through all that.

[01:18:57]>> Yeah. I I hope hopefully someday my son will see this and see the sacrifices that we made to make his life differently. That's why I really wanted to do this was I really wanted to get as much of it out there without me having to go through and talk to him. And so I hope one day he'll see this. It's not that I'm going to be like, "Hey, son, go watch it." Just hope one day he'll be able to see it. Just cuz there's more things I wish I knew about my mom or my dad that I'll never get to have those kind. There's things that come up all the time, questions of did you ever have these disease? Anybody in the family have these diseases.

[01:19:28]So, I hope that someday he'll get to, you know, use this for his own documentation.

[01:19:32]>> Yeah. What not to do.

[01:19:34]>> Cool. For sure.

[01:19:35]>> Well, thank you, man.

[01:19:36]>> Thank you very much. Much appreciated.

[01:19:37]>> Yep. Thank you. All right.