Mandalorian and Grogu is AWFUL - Star Wars A No Hope

Added: 2026-05-26

[00:00:01]nerdotic.com.

[00:00:03]>> Greetings you over 1 million Heliens and the 40% who haven't subscribed yet. When it comes to reviewing film, I find that the most enjoyable are either really good films or really bad films. with the really good. It's great to enthusiastically share something that I found inspirational, aspirational, thrilling, funny, horrific in a good way, or something that just kicked ass.

[00:00:25]With the really bad, which quite frankly is the most that comes from Hollywood these days, it's easy to pick that lowhanging fruit and mock the industry that has all the money and resources in the world, yet still finds new and unique ways to things up. And the one thing they both have in common is at least I found some sort of amusement and it wasn't a complete waste of time.

[00:00:51]Then there's the worst type of film to review, the boring and pointless movie that only exists to occupy your time as a piece of content. And as you're halfway through, your mind starts to wander and you come to the cold realization that you have just given up precious time that you will never get back. That's exactly what Star Wars: The Mandalorian and Grou is. The first film from the cinematic intellectual property known as Star Wars in at time of recording 55,632 hours or 2318 days or 331 weeks or 6 years, 4 months, and 2 days. But as you know, this is not Star Wars. This is Disney Star Wars.

[00:01:31]Paced with box office projections coming in under Solo: Star Wars Story, a film that came out eight years ago without adjusting for inflation, Disney decided to roll out the influencers to go influence. And that went well >> to get to see like my first little preview of it. I was losing my mind >> in IMAX. I was blown away.

[00:01:57]>> You're not going to want to miss this in IMAX.

[00:01:58]>> This is the way. Listen, I pride myself on my media literacy and my ability to really think deep thoughts about movies, but for this one, I I I don't care what the plot is as long as he's there. Okay?

[00:02:12]I am just here to see my baby thrive.

[00:02:21]Then, of course, there was this totally authentic picture that Pedro Pascal took with real fans. Oh, wait, no, it was staged for influencers. How embarrassing.

[00:02:31]>> But apparently the influence with anybody who was influential ends there with Disney because they're once tried and trueue comrades in the access media have turned on him. From the BBC, it's felt like homework. Why Star Wars went so wrong. Oh my god, bigots. From Slate, we have a new worst Star Wars movie. The Mandalorian and Grou is so bad it's baffling. Yet, it really isn't. From Time magazine, it's too bad Star Wars opted for Baby Yoda when Andor was right there. Too bad Andor cost over a half a billion dollars and nobody watched it.

[00:03:02]From Inverse, The Mandalorian and Grou is barely a movie. I completely disagree. It's not a movie.

[00:03:10]>> You did have a written plan originally for a fourth season.

[00:03:14]>> Oh, yeah.

[00:03:14]>> I'm kind of >> We had scripts. It wasn't just a plan.

[00:03:17]It was a We were getting ready cuz there was a work stoppage cuz there was a strike. In the past there there had been opportunities if you had already written something if there was a writer strike.

[00:03:27]We had scripts ready because I knew I'd have to stop writing. The strike went on for a long time and when we came out of the strike the conversation started which is like hey it will have been almost 7 years at this point since there's been a Star Wars film. These are characters that people know as there are other projects that were being planned.

[00:03:42]Is there something that we could do with these characters? At time of recording the critic score on Rotten Tomatoes is 61% and on Metacritic it's 53. And I can hear you now. Who gives a crap what the corporate critics think? They gave The Boys season 5 a 93%. That's [ __ ] >> And that is true. But I want you to remember the last Disney Star Wars film that hit the theaters almost 7 years ago that unintentionally united the fandom and corporate critics alike. The rise of Palpatine. And the same thing is going to happen here with Star Wars: The Mandalorian and Grou. Is it the worst Star Wars film ever made? No. Arguably, that could be The Last Jedi or The Rise of Skywalker. Both offensively bad. The Mandalorian and Grou is just offensively boring. An utterly pointless piece of content. And you've heard this a lot because it's true. It is essentially three filler episodes of a bad streaming series made into a bad streaming movie that they decided to release in the theaters. We here at Nerdic like to think that we provide a service because the one thing you can't get back is time. Essentially, I watch this movie so you don't have to, and it saves you 2 hours and 20 minutes of your valuable life.

[00:04:51]>> What are you waiting for? Hop on.

[00:04:55]>> The film opens up with a scene on a planet that's totally not Hoth with all terrained armored transports, all-terrain scout transports, and snow troopers. Remember the Empire Strikes Back?

[00:05:05]>> Remember Ed remember?

[00:05:10]Now, the Mandalorian is with Zeb from Rebels and little baby Grou, who's just a little cutesy booty.

[00:05:18]>> GROU, IT'S SO CUTE.

[00:05:20]>> As you may or may not know, the Mandalorian is now the official guardian and protector of little baby Grou. Now, why does he continually take a small child into dangerous situations that will mostly get him killed? That's something I've been wondering since season 1.

[00:05:34]>> Serves you right. Anyway, the Mandalorian with the help of that cute little baby grou slaughter all the snow troopers and Imperial warlord and easily take out the all-terrained armored transports which are now established canonically as some terrain armored transports. An opening scene that was barely worth the description because it has no consequence over the rest of the content other than being the end of episode 1. Mango, Grock, and Zeb go back to the New Republic base where they meet with Kathleen Kennedy played by Sigourney Weaver. Now, is she there to announce a bunch of projects that will eventually get scrapped? No. She tasks Mango and Grock to find a mysterious warlord known as Coin to find out what the Empire is up to. Now, how can they find out what the Empire is up to when there isn't an Empire? Don't know.

[00:06:17]>> No one knows what he looks like. And most believe him to be dead.

[00:06:21]>> Yeah, that's a great plan. That'sing genius. If I understand it correctly, this was a lot. And this will give you an idea how the rest of this movie is going to go because Mangu and Grock have to go to the planet Nal Hut to meet with the Hut twins to find the location of Jabba's son Rod of the Hut and then go to the planet Shakira to save Roda the Hut from the crime lord Janu so the New Republic can find the whereabouts of the mysterious warlord coin.

[00:06:47]As payment, Kathleen Kennedy gives the Mandalorian a new razor crest because Hasbro's pissed they blew up the last one.

[00:06:54]And then we're off on a pointless meandering adventure filled with inconsequential action scenes peppered with cute little Baby Yoda scenes. OH, IT'S A baby Yoda.

[00:07:05]>> Mando meets with the Hut twins who show him the last known picture of Rod of the Hut, which is from the Clone Wars movie.

[00:07:11]You know, the often forgotten first theatrical Star Wars flop written by Dave Fona, who has coincidentally potentially written the latest Star Wars flop, Mango and Grock.

[00:07:21]>> We have the story. Dave and I bounce back and forth with the story. He'll do doodles or give me notes. Dave's very good at uh this is taking way too long, so let's get this over with. So, Mango, Grock, and Zeb go to the planet Shakira and find Roda the Hut roided up to the gills.

[00:07:37]>> Maybe Jaba the Hut. Oh, I >> Mango goes to save Rada, who was perfectly happy as a gladiator with only one fight to go. And then he's freed from the crime lord Janu who treats him well. And then the stunt man, voice acted by Pedro Pascal, talks to an alien, voice acted by Martin Scorsesei.

[00:07:53]>> Whoa, for this price, I'll tell you whatever you want.

[00:07:55]>> Who tells him the whereabouts of Janu.

[00:07:57]And then Mando talks to Janu and offers to buy Rada's contract out, which he declines. Then in his infinite wisdom, the genius crime lord Janu tells Mando that he plans to kill Rod of the Hut rather than free him. And then Mando goes back to Rod of the Hut and tells him Janu is going to kill him. Rod of the Hut doesn't believe him and they end up in a battle that's supposed to look like the game board on the Millennium Falcon. Remember Star Wars?

[00:08:21]>> And then they escape after the laser gate around the arena is shorted out which is reminiscent of the laser gate in Obi-Wan. And then there's a pointless chase scene through space Chicago where eventually Mangu Grock and Zeb capture Rod of the Hut. Now through all this we learn that Rod of the Hut wants to be and I quote his own man. Now why would a hut say I want to be my own man? Not sure. He's tired of living in his father Jabba's shadow. And he also tells Mango that the hut twins don't want to save him. They want to kill him. And that the crime lord Janu is the warlord coin. You know, the person the New Republic is looking for for information on an empire that's not the Empire. So instead of turning Rada in, they decide to go capture Janu and land on a beach that looks like it's just outside a shell cottage in Tinssworth. I wonder where Dobby's grave is. And despite being heavily outnumbered by stormtroopers, they capture Janu who looks suspiciously like Alistister Crowley pretty easily.

[00:09:13]And they go back to the New Republic base where we get a Dave Fona cameo as Dave Fona and they turn him into Kathleen Kennedy. And that's the end of that episode.

[00:09:21]>> I'm gay.

[00:09:22]>> In the next episode, Mango, Grock, and Rada go to the planet with the Baboo Fris. And no, I don't give a [ __ ] what their species NAME IS.

[00:09:29]>> SO MANY HORRIBLE. I'M A HORRIBLE BABY. A bad baby. And then the stunt man voice acted by Pedro Pascal is captured by the bounty hunter Embo from Dave Fona's Clone Wars and Rebels. And you wouldn't know this character's name if you watch this film because they never say it. Um I don't care.

[00:09:45]>> So now both Mango and Rod of the Hut are prisoners of the Hut twins who feel double crossed and for the first time in this film they take off the Mandalorian's helmet and unfortunately we get to see Pedro Pascal's face and then he falls through a trap door just like Return of the Jedi. Remember the rainco.

[00:10:02]>> But now I understand why they took off his helmet so Pedro Pascal can go into battle with a giant white snake. Make of that what you will. But not before the huts inexplicably return his helmet that they just stated was one of the most valuable things on the black market.

[00:10:17]Because obviously Pedro Pascal was only scheduled for a couple days of shooting.

[00:10:21]And isn't it strange that throughout the series and this film, people continually capture and want to kill the Mandalorian, yet they still let him keep his armor and his helmet. Anyway, Pedro Pascal is bitten by the white snake and then beats the white snake. And then he's saved by cutie booty baby Yoda and the baboo fricks who take off without knowing they leave little cutie booty baby Yoda behind which is a good thing because eventually the mango succumbs to his wounds.

[00:10:48]And then there's an excessively long scene with cutie booty tootsie baby Yoda doing cutesy things.

[00:10:56]Taking care of the Mandalorian, building him a hut. randomly running across an alien who gives him an antidote to the poison. And during this scene, you can go to the bathroom, drop a deuce, come back, then go to the counter and get some snacks, come back, and then go home and do your taxes and come back and it'll still be going on.

[00:11:14]Of course, the mango is okay, and he and Grock find a crash ship, which they fix pretty easily. There's another pointless battle, but it does include something I've always wanted to see since I was a kid, a giant CGI gobbledygook hut brawl.

[00:11:25]The Hut twins get swallowed by Pedro Pascal's White Snake. And while many people will call this a movie made for kids, and hey, you may be right. What do I know? Because every kid in America wants to see a 76-year-old woman piloting an X-wing fighter. Speaking of Sigourney Weaver's Kathleen Kennedy, if you saw this film, which most of you have not and will not, didn't you find it interesting that she called in the order to bomb the Hut Fortress while Mango, Grock, and Rada were still in it, and they barely escaped, jumping out at the height of a few hundred feet. But of course, Baby Yoda conveniently forgets he's able to use the Force when just a few minutes ago he was able to lift an entire hut out of a pit. But to be fair, that's something the Mandalorian series did quite a bit. Forgetting to use the Force, forgetting to use a jetpack, forgetting to use a blaster, forgetting that telling a story isn't just a series of side quests. Anyway, everybody's okay. Rod of the Hut joins the rebellion and Mango and Grock take off. And if you ignore my advice and actually watch this movie, you will forget it by the time you get to your car. You may have noticed my excessive use of and then I was just trying to match thematically what the movie was. A series of and THEN >> a piece of content that was essentially a cartoon with humans in it who mailed it in. Not if you all die.

[00:12:42]>> I'm so scared. I hate to say it, but the legendary Sigourney Weaver was abysmal in this as Kathleen Kennedy and I half expected her to say fade in at the beginning of every scene.

[00:12:52]>> Their nephew is being held against his will by another crime syndicate on the Outer Rim, and they need a professional to get him out quickly and quietly.

[00:13:01]>> And I got to give respect to Pedro Pascal for suckering Disney into giving him money for doing next to nothing.

[00:13:07]Three seasons of The Mandalorian, two episodes of Boba Fett, and now a movie of the most passionless voice acting you've ever heard. But at least you got to see me wrestle with the white snake.

[00:13:18]Again, this isn't the worst Disney Star Wars ever made, and it is the most inoffensive when it comes to breaking canon, but it definitely earns the label of the Blandoran. It plays out like a film made as a contractual obligation to retain rights. It's Lucasfilm being in a full-blown identity crisis and doing the safest thing possible, man. and going Grock isn't woke, but it does have a 76-year-old girl boss piloting an X-wing fighter, but it doesn't have anything like they fly now or somehow Palpatine returned. It does accomplish one thing.

[00:13:48]It shows us how the First Order came to power because the New Republic is [ __ ] But the biggest takeaway from Star Wars, The Mandalorian, and Grou won't be the film itself. It will be the reaction to it or the lack thereof because it's going to shine a light on the absolute state of Disney Star Wars who's been able to hide their diminishing returns and outright failures behind nebulous streaming numbers. And listen, Disney can only lie to itself for so long and the access media can only deny reality for so long.

[00:14:17]And it's nice to see people coming around. Oh, there's a problem with Star Wars you don't say. People have been saying that the failure of Disney Star Wars has to be studied. And I'm here to tell you it already has with hundreds of videos by my fellow content creators, including one of the best by my good friend Mer, Star Wars Cannot Grow Up.

[00:14:34]The good news is this is a completely isolated film. You do not need to watch The Mandalorian or any other Star Wars project to watch this movie. The better news is you don't need to watch this movie. But Mango and Grock will serve as the most damning evidence that Disney Star Wars has entered the phase of apathy.

[00:14:54]The crazy thing is if you had released Mango and Grock, say after Mandalorian season 2, it would have made more money and Star Wars would be better off if Disney hadn't made any. And you can't say we didn't try to warn you. So, as this movie ends up being a major disappointment and people start to scramble at Disney, Lucasfilm is left with only one option. No, not fire everybody and start from scratch while also erasing everything they made. While that would be nice, I would warn to be careful what you wish for because I believe we are one step closer to this inevitability. Disney's going to remake Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi. Search your feelings. You know this to be true.

[00:15:31]>> No.

[00:15:32]>> If you like what you heard, please like, share, and subscribe. If you didn't like what you heard, I thank you for listening this long. I will see you in the next video.

[00:15:41]>> Please subscribe.

[00:15:58]Heat.