78-79 TV's Worst One-Year Wonders. So Bad?

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[00:00:00]Um, upstairs, first door on the right.

[00:00:02]Gracias. Excuse me.

[00:00:11]Wow, what a great face. Face? What a great tush.

[00:00:17]>> [music] >> Oh, 1978, the world first met Michael Myers. No, not that one.

[00:00:33]Yeah, that one.

[00:00:35]Uh, Reese's Pieces first came out. E.T.

[00:00:37]would later appreciate that. And the addictive electronic game Simon first hit shelves.

[00:00:45]But I'm talking about things that no one was trying to remember for fun, sport, or points. And I've got some wild trivia here, too. Now, none of the shows I'm about to mention lasted more than 11 episodes, and that's low. I can explain.

[00:00:57]Paul here, actor and former radio host.

[00:00:59]Top shows of 1978-1979 on ABC had them all on one night. On Tuesday, Fonzie's dog is down in the dumps. Fonzie is not so Dr. Joyce Brothers makes a house call on Happy Days.

[00:01:13]Then Laverne needs some heavy dental work, and Shirley's pain in the mouth cousin has the solution. Then on Three's Company, Roper raises the rent.

[00:01:21]Yep, Laverne and Shirley, Three's Company, and Happy Days. But, I'm talking about the other end of the list.

[00:01:28]You know, the shows that had to sit on it. My one-and-done shows from the '78-'79 TV season. Yeah, sure, some of them are summer replacements. Were they any good, though? I count them down, you decide. Number 10, Grandpa Goes to Washington. Oh, it sounds funny.

[00:01:46]It wasn't a comedy.

[00:01:48]Mr. I'll be taking a keen interest in all your activities right from the start. And I want you to know I'll be taking a keen interest in your activities all the time. Jack Albertson plays a crusty down-to-earth professor who's a grandpa with no previous political experience, and he's elected to the US Senate. And his name is Joe.

[00:02:07]Yeah, he's Grandpa Joe again. You wanted more, Charlie? All right. In one episode, he calls out the president for using taxpayer money for his birthday party, but it's dicey because Grandpa Joe's granddaughter is dating the president's son.

[00:02:22]Ran just 11 episodes.

[00:02:24]Number nine, Who's Watching the Kids?

[00:02:27]Oh, wait till you see this cast.

[00:02:35]>> [music] [music] >> Here comes a daydream drifting down on you.

[00:02:47]Reach out, take [music] it, make it all come true.

[00:02:51]Follow the dream until you see where it's going.

[00:02:55]And like a kid, you're [music] going to feel yourself growing Go for the daydream, singing >> [music] >> like a song.

[00:03:04]Before you know it, someone is singing [singing] along.

[00:03:08]And like the kids [music] who know their dream when You wake yourself up, and you know you can be >> [music] >> You can be as warm as sunshine. You can be as bright as day.

[00:03:21]All depends on what you're watching.

[00:03:23]Who's watching [music] the kids from day to day?

[00:03:27]Try watching the kids.

[00:03:28]>> [music] >> They know the way.

[00:03:31]WHO'S WATCHING THE KIDS?

[00:03:38]TWO VEGAS SHOWGIRLS LIVE WITH THEIR two younger siblings, and the fun begins.

[00:03:42]Melissa thinks that you're her date for the party.

[00:03:45]>> Good evening, Lauren. But when Lauren's real date checks in, Melissa checks out.

[00:03:49]Waverly wonders, who's watching the kids? Friday starting at 8:00 7:00 Central Mountain on NBC. Also, just 11 episodes. Number eight, Sword of Justice. The exciting intro explains it.

[00:04:11]>> [music] >> This court finds Jack Martin Cole guilty of 25 counts [music] of embezzlement.

[00:04:20]That is an absolute lie.

[00:04:23]Those criminals framed me for something I didn't do. And I'll pay them back for every >> [music] >> single day of those three long years.

[00:04:32]They say this place is like a college, but I want to go to school.

[00:04:36]So, you want to know about burglar alarms, huh?

[00:04:39]You never know when precision acrobatics will come in handy. Yeah, any lock can be picked if you got the right tools and the right touch.

[00:04:50]>> [music] >> You mean we're going to bug the federal building? There's a whole level of crime operating above the law. We're going to help put an end to it.

[00:05:11]That sounded like the uh soldier of fortune. Uh, during sweeps weeks, they had plots like this.

[00:05:19]>> part of your wardrobe is your tan.

[00:05:20][music] Jack Cole goes undercover to get the bare facts on an X-rated movie racket. Jack [music] Rambo stars in Sword of Justice tonight. They had a few good guest stars, too, like Larry Hagman. You're not going to arrange anything.

[00:05:32]The only thing we're going to arrange is you getting out of here. So, pack your bags and start hitchhiking out, young man. Dear friend, whatever you Uh, I'm so glad you remembered me.

[00:05:39]Uh, you're looking okay. What have you done to your lapel?

[00:05:43]Oh. Tuna salad? Hm.

[00:05:45]Uh, how have you been, Mr. [music] Redding?

[00:05:48]Cole. Jack Cole. Surely you remember.

[00:05:54]Yes, of course. Jack Cole. Doyle, don't indulge him. Have him thrown out.

[00:06:00]Since apparently you know each other, then.

[00:06:03]No, no, no, no. I'm sure he meant no harm. Uh, let's just forget the whole thing.

[00:06:06]>> Forget it, Doyle. This man is a hack.

[00:06:08]>> Let's not change the subject, Elena.

[00:06:11]We don't want to start the tournament off on the wrong foot. That's the way your father would have wanted it.

[00:06:17]No.

[00:06:18]Elena, darling, please. I [music] do apologize.

[00:06:22]You have apparently stirred everybody up. I'll send you a bill.

[00:06:28]Only 10 episodes total. Number seven, David Cassidy, Man Undercover.

[00:06:38]>> [music] >> Every sunshine wore >> [music] >> a cool smile, but you'll leave it behind in too >> [music] >> short a time, you'll find.

[00:06:56]You're undercover. [music] Hard times hard times >> [music] >> Who's on your side, then?

[00:07:06]Are they saying >> [music] >> anything Are you going [music] to find out hard times hard times >> [music] >> whose luck will be taken?

[00:07:22]Or are you going to let them take >> [music] >> a piece of you?

[00:07:28]Yeah, David Cassidy plays Dan Shay, an undercover cop in the LA youth scene.

[00:07:37]What made you think that your daughter was any different from any other man's daughter you've been pushing those pills to? Listen.

[00:07:44]Listen to me.

[00:07:45]Your father, we need you. He's in trouble.

[00:07:48]Police!

[00:07:51]>> [music] >> With plots like that, ran just 10 episodes. Number six, oh, you guys mentioned this one a lot in the comments. Here it is, Supertrain.

[00:08:01]>> [music] [music] [music] [music] [music] [music] [music] [music] [music] [music] [music] [music] >> Yeah, well, like the Love Boat, Fantasy Island recipes, plots about the travelers, and lots of guest stars. It's the all new Supertrain, loaded with stars.

[00:09:46]Loaded with action, coming at you next on NBC. Oh, and odd plots, like in one episode, two dwarfs and a magician kidnap a presidential candidate and replace him with an evil twin. You don't believe me? On this week's Supertrain mystery, hail [music] to the chief. Two dwarfs and a magician replace a presidential candidate with a double so real even his wife can't tell. JJ, all I want to do right now is go to bed.

[00:10:12]On Supertrain.

[00:10:15]This gem went off the tracks after just nine episodes. Hey, coming up I have got a pro football player playing a pro basketball player. Oh, and another Jerry Van Dyke sighting.

[00:10:25]Hey, yeah, please share, like, and subscribe if you would and also hype.

[00:10:29]Whatever that means.

[00:10:31]Number five, Waverly Wonders.

[00:10:37]>> [music] [music] [music] [singing] [music] [music] >> Oh, you're getting to me.

[00:11:16]Joe Namath plays an ex-basketball player who now coaches and teaches at Waverly High School. Friday, Joe plays cupid.

[00:11:24]What did it cost to lose your [music] macho image? And Rafter puts on her basketball and puts on a dress to get a date [music] with Dave. It was a little goofy. I watched it. Only nine episodes though. Number four, 13 Queens Boulevard. Interesting cast here.

[00:11:41]>> [music] [music and singing] [music] [music] [music] [music and singing] [music] [music] >> Yep, another failed show with Jerry Van Dyke. He was still swinging and missing.

[00:12:31]Also, did you see Louise Williams there?

[00:12:33]Now, she was going to be Shirley in Laverne and Shirley until Cindy Williams changed her mind and decided to take the part. Both last name Williams, no relation. Anyway, 13 Queens Boulevard was simply about an apartment complex at that address and its tenants. Yeah, here they discuss a baby shower for an unwed mother. Just think of it as making the baby shower for the baby. I mean, you can't be mad at a baby because his mother isn't married. Oh, I'm not mad at her for not being married. I'm mad at her for not even wanting to be married.

[00:13:04]Oh, Mildred, stop it. This is 1979.

[00:13:07]Again, I'm getting the dates.

[00:13:10]Everybody born after the 1950 is part calendar. Whatever you say to him, they tell you what YEAR IT IS.

[00:13:19]WHO is it? Me and Lois.

[00:13:24]Hi, come on in.

[00:13:25]Hi, Lois. You staying a while? Yeah, a little while. Take your coat off.

[00:13:31]We got to get back to work.

[00:13:33]Guess what? We got $60 for the crib.

[00:13:35]Which one should we get? The $75 one with my store discount. Should we get the one with the clowns or the one with the monkeys? Yes, Lois. Which one is proper for a child born out of wedlock?

[00:13:49]Oh, will you stop it already? Susie's entitled to live her life the way she wants. This is 1979.

[00:13:58]Ran only nine episodes. Number three, Turnabout. Oh, this open explains the crazy plot. Once upon a time in a very nice city in a very nice house, there lived a very nice man and a very nice woman.

[00:14:15]They were married to each other and they loved each other very much. They not only loved each other, they also liked each other. How about that? But, they had a problem. Even though they loved each other and liked each other and had good jobs, they sometimes were not very happy. They envied each other. They each thought the other one had a more interesting life and they wished [music] they could change places with each other. And they said that.

[00:14:43]Unfortunately, they said it in front of a statue that had a magic spell and lo and behold, his spirit [music] and personality went into her body and hers went into his. And that's the way they are today. Will they live happily ever after?

[00:15:02]Well, let's see.

[00:15:04]>> [music] >> Poor John Schuck, right? Fresh off playing Yo-Yo the Robot Cop, now he's playing a woman. This live-action promo also explains it. Angeli. That's my husband, Sam.

[00:15:17]>> My wife, Penny. And this is Turnabout.

[00:15:21]>> [music] >> A little magic made Penny and Sam switch bodies. I am in your body and you're in mine. And sometimes [music] things get too hot to handle. Watch Turnabout Fridays on the new NBC.

[00:15:35]It's pretty much what you think. Here we see the wife as a man invited to the office steam room. Uh-oh.

[00:15:41]We're going to meet him in the steam room at 10:00. Steam room?

[00:15:48]Hi.

[00:15:51]I think I may die. Please God, make it a heart attack. Then it will be over fast.

[00:15:57]This is terrific, huh?

[00:15:58]Wonderful. Wonderful.

[00:16:00]Thank you. Did you see the last week's game?

[00:16:03]Of course we saw the game.

[00:16:06]>> [laughter] >> Sam, don't you think Randy has the best pair of hands in football? I hadn't noticed.

[00:16:22]Turnabout had just eight episodes.

[00:16:25]Number two, Billy, starring Steve Guttenberg and this cast.

[00:16:31]>> [music] [music] [music] >> This was your classic Walter Mitty. He daydreamed a lot with plots like this.

[00:17:08]Monday, let your imagination run [music] wild with Billy. He's a dreamer with fantasies that drive everyone crazy and Monday he imagines that he's the world's [music] greatest doctor and his father's trip to the hospital TURNS INTO A CRACK-UP.

[00:17:23]THAT'S BILLY. MONDAY at 8:00 7:00 Central and Mountain. It had a great bunch of guest stars, too, like Suzanne Somers and Lou Ferrigno as Billy daydream, but the dreams lasted only seven episodes.

[00:17:36]Now, here we are. My number one one-and-done TV show of the 1978-1979 season. Oh, boy, Miss Winslow and Son.

[00:17:47]>> [music] [music] [music] [music] [music] >> Another unwed mother. Now, this was pretty bad. Susan Winslow, an unwed art designer, and she has a baby and that's pretty much it. First of all, look at what he's done to your body.

[00:18:52]It'll take months before you can wear a bikini.

[00:18:55]And and when's the last time you had a full night's sleep?

[00:18:58]You're even scared to leave him alone enough to go to the john.

[00:19:01]>> [laughter] >> You're right.

[00:19:03]I sit him on my lap.

[00:19:07]Oh, Rosa, I I feel so inadequate, especially when he cries. Sure you do, cuz you're convinced that if you weren't a crummy mother, the kid wouldn't be crying in the first place, right?

[00:19:21]Right.

[00:19:22]Okay, Rosa, so tell me, what can I do about this? It'll pass.

[00:19:26]Oh, I hope so.

[00:19:28]I'd hate to feel this way when he graduates from law school.

[00:19:33]This show has a 2.5 rating on IMDb.

[00:19:36]That's super low. Only 11 votes right now, but that's also kind of a telltale sign.

[00:19:41]Anyway, there were just six episodes of Miss Winslow and [snorts] Son. All right, ouch. Well, let me hear it. Which ones were good? Which ones did you watch because you wanted to or were made to by your parents? Let me know all that and more in the comments. Also, please like, subscribe, and hype. And take a look at my first video on 1970s low-rated TV shows. Uh that's out there. And also, I did a video about the whole Shirley Williams thing and how she became Shirley on Laverne & Shirley. So, if you want to see that, it's right here.