The Rise Of Male Apathy

[00:00:00]Do you guys want to help women in any way? No, right?

[00:00:04]>> The other day I was speaking with someone that I hadn't spoken to in a while, and she asked me what I was doing now. And I told her that I speak out online on behalf of men and their issues.

[00:00:15]Which prompted a question from her, one that I think many women are asking these days.

[00:00:20]Which is what's happened to men?

[00:00:23]To paraphrase what she was saying, basically it came down to seriously, Dan, when did men stop caring and why?

[00:00:31]Mhm. And as I explained to her what was going on, I could >> How we say like for men to not care the way we care now, we fought our biological directive that was implanted into our lizard brains to not want to help people and help women.

[00:00:49]And I literally think it was implanted into us to be able to have our species keep growing, right? Is if we didn't care about helping women or saving women because they cried or whatever it is, our species would not be alive now.

[00:01:04]>> could see that she wasn't well, let's just say taking it well.

[00:01:10]Now, to be sure, she is actually a very nice woman and most definitely not one of the crazies.

[00:01:16]But that said, I could see she was really struggling with what I was saying. Mostly because as she basically said to me after I said men were done being put down, disrespected, and demeaned by people like politicians, women, and society as a whole, I never thought of it that way.

[00:01:34]Which I think is a fair assumption to make about many women, how they simply run on their emotions and never stop to think even for a millisecond that there might be some consequences to their actions. Consequences >> Critical thinking?

[00:01:50]What?

[00:01:51]>> is to their constant attacking of men.

[00:01:54]Which is why I thought it might be good to talk about it a bit more in hopes that maybe, just maybe, a few more women will, like her, have their eyes opened.

[00:02:05]Which is a big ask, I know, cuz we all know women don't like hearing anything >> if we can get one woman to kind of understand what's going on through at least one of our videos, I think we're doing a damn good job.

[00:02:16]>> that doesn't [laughter] fit their feels, no matter how true it might be.

[00:02:21]But this isn't just about dating. It's not just about marriage. It's about men withdrawing from everything.

[00:02:28]>> Everything.

[00:02:29]>> The workplace, society, politics, the news, even men trying to explain how they think and feel in hopes of convincing people that they're wrong about what they think about men. For years now, we've heard the same old question from everyone, what's wrong with men?

[00:02:45]But is that really the right question to be asking?

[00:02:48]No.

[00:02:49]No, it's not. The right question, the better question is, why are we so surprised by what's happening when we've spent years telling a group of people that they don't matter.

[00:03:00]Because from where I'm sitting, a lot of men didn't suddenly wake up one morning and decide to check out.

[00:03:07]They got there one disappointment at a time, one double standard at a time, one dismissal at a time, one disrespect at a time. Till eventually, collectively, they simply decided to just stop caring.

[00:03:22]And honestly, how can you blame them?

[00:03:26]>> And it's so much easier to not care.

[00:03:30]It is sadly easy to not care.

[00:03:35]>> And let's start with the most obvious one, relationships.

[00:03:39]For generations, men were told that marriage was the goal. Find a good woman, build a family, work hard, save >> And men were fine with this. Men were like, "Yeah, I want that. You know what? Family, kids, legacy, I'll work for it. I'll work for it.

[00:03:56]>> Sacrifice, provide, protect, raise your kids. That was the dream that men were sold. Oh, >> but we just never got it.

[00:04:04]>> Only for most of them to eventually realize it was actually a nightmare.

[00:04:09]Which is why today most men don't even see the point.

[00:04:13]They're told they're unnecessary one minute and the next that they're expected to sacrifice. They're told masculinity is a problem, then asked where have all the good men gone?

[00:04:24]They've watched relationship after relationship implode.

[00:04:29]They hear horror stories from their friends about divorces, custody battles, and financial devastation, false allegations, public humiliation, and eventually they ask themselves one simple question.

[00:04:41]Why would I volunteer for this? Why would any sane person want to deal with any of that?

[00:04:48]And I know, I know ladies, not all relationships are like that. And you're actually right, and I know that because I have a happy, healthy relationship and have had one for going on 15 years now.

[00:05:01]>> Shout out to you, Dan.

[00:05:02]>> But you see, that's not the point. No, the point is perception. The point is the very real risk that is omnipresent for men.

[00:05:11]And men, if they do nothing else, one thing's for damn sure.

[00:05:15]They make decisions based on what they believe the risks are.

[00:05:20]And for a growing number of men, they've done the analysis, done the ROI, and found the reward simply doesn't outweigh the risk anymore. Then, there's work.

[00:05:31]You know, the very thing men's entire lives and existence is judged by.

[00:05:36]>> Pretty much.

[00:05:37]>> Companies used to talk about things like loyalty, working hard, staying late, giving 110%.

[00:05:45]They were told, "We're all family." That is, right up until one Friday afternoon, suddenly their badge no longer worked.

[00:05:53]Their email was gone. And security was escorting them out to the parking lot.

[00:06:00]Funny, isn't it, how the family reunion only lasts until the latest quarterly earnings report?

[00:06:07]>> Mhm.

[00:06:07]>> Add to it, promotions and hiring are no longer based on merit. No longer based on the best person for the job. No, they're based on how many checkboxes HR can cross off to try and make the company look good.

[00:06:22]So, what did men do? Well, men stopped killing themselves for promotions they weren't going to get.

[00:06:29]Stopped volunteering for overtime that was never appreciated. They've stopped making work their entire identity.

[00:06:37]Because if a company can replace you before your coffee gets cold, then why should your entire life revolve around making someone else rich? Then there's society itself. And this one might be the hardest one for us to talk about, mostly because somewhere along the way, men started realizing that in the end, nothing they ever did counted.

[00:06:58]They started realizing that none of it gets acknowledged, let alone appreciated.

[00:07:03]Do something good? Well, that's what men are supposed to do. It's the bare minimum a man should be doing.

[00:07:11]Make a mistake though, well, suddenly that's going to define you. It's going to show who you really are.

[00:07:19]Then there's the fact that men are the ones who've designed, built, and continue to maintain and improve our entire society.

[00:07:27]Everything around us wouldn't be here if it wasn't for men. Yep. But rather than admit that, men are being castigated for it.

[00:07:36]Work dangerous jobs? Nobody notices.

[00:07:39]Keep the lights on, collect the garbage, repair power lines after hurricanes, work on rigs offshore, dig mines, build >> Just being a lineman in general without any bad weather is already >> build roads, climb towers.

[00:07:55]Again, none of that's important. No, that's what men should be doing. So, why should we give any thanks to them at all?

[00:08:04]Yet, society depends on men doing these jobs every single day.

[00:08:09]But, appreciation? Well, to be kind, that seems to be in pretty short supply.

[00:08:14]It's funny, isn't it, how the people everyone notices are usually the ones sitting behind their cameras and microphones? The ones taking advantage of all the things men have provided that allows them to do so. Yep. All while they're attacking and demeaning those same men >> And remember who's giving them all the attention and money. It's still men.

[00:08:33]>> for daring to do so.

[00:08:37]It's exactly why the men actually keeping civilization running, well, most people never learn their names, and most don't have the first clue the sacrifices that they're making in doing so.

[00:08:49]Nor do they care to, which is why men have stopped doing things like arguing online, chasing likes, trying to impress strangers.

[00:08:58]They've stopped apologizing for just existing.

[00:09:03]There's no point in having conversations with people that have proven time and again they aren't going to listen or acknowledge anything that you have to say.

[00:09:12]>> Yep.

[00:09:12]>> No, men have got better things to do with their time now.

[00:09:17]They'd rather >> Remember GTA is coming out.

[00:09:19]>> spend it fishing or hunting, >> I don't really care for it, but I know a lot of you guys want to play it, so >> hunting, working in the garage, playing with their dog. They're off hitting the gyms and building something.

[00:09:31]They're choosing to simply be left alone.

[00:09:34]And guess what?

[00:09:36]They're finding happiness in doing so.

[00:09:40]They simply no longer care what anyone has to think because for most of them, no one has cared what they had to think for their entire lives.

[00:09:50]And you know what's truly terrifying to people who use guilt as a weapon?

[00:09:55]Someone who no longer is interested in feeling guilty.

[00:10:00]Which is why they're so afraid of the so-called manosphere, why they are desperately trying to shut it down.

[00:10:07]Because men are coming together. Men are talking.

[00:10:11]And they're pointing out to each other just how absurd things have become.

[00:10:16]And in the process showing even more men why they need to stop caring as well.

[00:10:22]>> No, 100% Dan. It start for me it started with The Godfather, right?

[00:10:27]He He showed me the light.

[00:10:29]I was like, you know what? I'm going to show some people some of the light, too.

[00:10:33]And I made my own content. And then now we have people like Dan. We have people like P. We have people like Jack Morgan.

[00:10:40]We have so many men now that are sharing their experiences and their And it's kind of spreading the word, all right? We have men of different creed, different sizes, different skin color, different races. We got a Cambodian guy here. We got Dan is white. We got P black. We got, you know, a whole bunch of different people. I don't know Actually, I don't think I know any Hispanic creators. Maybe I have to go look for some Hispanic creators.

[00:11:08]>> Finally, we get to what I think is the biggest reason of all why men have walked away, why so many men have become apathetic.

[00:11:16]And I mentioned it just a moment ago in passing, but I want to reiterate it and really drive this point home because from men's perspective, nobody's cared about them first.

[00:11:27]For years now, men have felt like they were told to be stronger, work harder, complain less, sacrifice more, but expect less.

[00:11:37]They were told to just figure it out yourself cuz nobody's coming for you.

[00:11:41]>> True.

[00:11:42]>> Handle it. Be a man.

[00:11:45]And what did men do after hearing that over and over?

[00:11:48]They listened and said, "Okay, if that's what you want."

[00:11:53]And guess what again? In doing so, they found peace. Even funnier is how when men actually heard all that, they responded by doing exactly what they were told.

[00:12:05]And now, people are acting surprised that men have become emotionally unavailable.

[00:12:11]They're shocked that men have withdrawn from dating and marriage.

[00:12:15]They're surprised that men >> This emotional unavailability is so true.

[00:12:21]I used to be very emotional. Not like emotional emotional, but I used to show more emotions.

[00:12:28]Nowadays, like you guys see my like uh reactions here, but it's just in normal life, I just don't care to chit-chat with people, talk with people, or share thoughts or anything like that. No, no, I'm very closed off nowadays. After my divorce and everything, it's just been very more like that, so.

[00:12:47]>> have stopped volunteering. They're surprised that men have stopped believing institutions had their backs.

[00:12:53]Even more surprised that men have stopped caring what strangers thought at all.

[00:13:00]And here's the thing.

[00:13:01]Apathy isn't loud, and neither are men.

[00:13:05]It's why they're not marching in the streets, why they're not trying to trend on social media, present company accepted. They don't scream and stomp their feet time and again like little children. No, they just shrug and walk away.

[00:13:18]And that's what makes it so dangerous because you see an angry man still believes something can change. But a man who's become truly a pathetic has stopped believing anyone is listening.

[00:13:31]Mostly because he already knows they aren't.

[00:13:36]And that's a much harder problem to solve. People keep asking how to get men engaged again. How get them dating again, marrying again, leading again, participating again. Well, maybe the answer starts with something incredibly simple. So >> Appreciate us.

[00:13:53]>> So simple that people will refuse to actually do it.

[00:13:58]It starts by acknowledging that men are people themselves.

[00:14:04]Actual human beings.

[00:14:06]It starts by not framing anything men say or do as toxic.

[00:14:11]It starts by not demanding men open up and then viciously and brutally attacking them when they do.

[00:14:19]It starts by not labeling men coming together as toxic masculinity, being red-pilled, hating women, or a host of the other labels that women, the media, and politicians have stuck on men who dare to try and find a place where they felt heard.

[00:14:36]The bottom line is this, people care about people who care about them. And respect has to travel in both directions.

[00:14:44]>> That's why I always say it guys, fuck with people that fuck with you.

[00:14:49]>> So when you've spent decades convincing millions of men that they're valued only for what they can produce and spent years telling them that they are inherently bad or defective simply because of how they were born, well, you don't get to be shocked when one day they quietly decide to produce less or don't want to be the world's piñata anymore.

[00:15:12]When you spend decades telling men every single day that their struggles don't matter, you don't get to be surprised when they stop talking about them.

[00:15:23]And if you've spent decades acting like nobody owes men empathy, which is exactly what's going on, you don't get to be surprised when many men eventually start returning the favor, returning that energy back in kind.

[00:15:39]And that's the conversation we should be having. Not what's wrong with men, but what happens to any group of people when they conclude that nobody really gives a shit whether they show up at all. The other day I was You know, it's true.

[00:15:55]Well, when you have this feeling in life that you're useless and nobody cares for you, why would you want to do anything? Why?

[00:16:05]It is a very logical thing to think. It is a very logical way for men to go about life.

[00:16:11]Nobody wants me?

[00:16:12]Fine. Then I'm not going to do anything.

[00:16:15]Please like, subscribe, comment down below. I really appreciate that. Catch you guys next time. Ciao.