Kevin Samuels CHECKS 41-Year-Old Baby Mama Blaming Black Men for Her Dating Life

Added: 2026-05-13

[00:00:00]Welcome back to No Filter Doze.

[00:00:02]Tonight's caller is 41. Says, "Black women struggle dating black men because of upbringing and preferences, but Kevin starts pulling the story apart. Four sons, three fathers, never married, and a history of dating older men leads the conversation into accountability and the choices she kept making. Make sure you like and subscribe and don't forget to regularly support Kevin Samuels original channel because that's how we help keep his message circulating in the culture.

[00:00:32]>> 41. What do you got for me on the topic?

[00:00:37]>> Why do black women keep losing their value?

[00:00:39]>> I just started listening to your show.

[00:00:44]>> I think it's has something to do with their upbringing to be honest.

[00:00:48]>> Okay.

[00:00:49]Because since I was young in high school, I went to a predominantly black I mean a predominantly white school with a lot of Puerto Ricans. And all the black young men at that time were dating white men. I mean white women, Hispanic women only. And it was very hard for black women even at that very young age to be able to date a black man. that preference was a white woman or Hispanic women versus >> How old are you?

[00:01:18]>> 41.

[00:01:19]>> 41. So, we're roughly the same.

[00:01:21]>> 41.

[00:01:22]>> We're We're 11 years apart. What state are you What state were you born in? Did you were >> I was born in the state of Pennsylvania.

[00:01:31]>> Yes.

[00:01:32]>> So, due respect, ma'am, I don't buy that. We're separated by 11 years and not in Generation X. Did you see most black men dating non-black women? If you're a millennial or zenil, yeah. Not 41.

[00:01:52]>> Where I live? Yes. Where was that?

[00:01:55]>> The surrounding city.

[00:01:56]>> Where was >> I live in like the Lehi Valley, which is mostly Hispanic >> and white, but the surrounding city like Philadelphia, they definitely they do like um date black women. But speaking from my experience growing up, >> it was very hard for me. Like in order for me to date a black man, I would have to date somebody from New York City or Philadelphia. And >> you have any children?

[00:02:21]>> I do. I have four sons.

[00:02:24]>> How many times you been married?

[00:02:24]>> No, I never been married.

[00:02:26]>> What? Why not?

[00:02:29]>> Um I honestly believe that I was never married because I made uh poor choices in men.

[00:02:36]>> How many different fathers?

[00:02:38]I have three different fathers.

[00:02:41]>> How old is your youngest?

[00:02:43]>> He's 11.

[00:02:45]>> How old is your oldest?

[00:02:47]>> He's 23.

[00:02:50]>> And all the fathers are black men.

[00:02:54]>> Three of them are black. I mean, two of them, two of them are black and one is white. The last one is white.

[00:03:02]>> What are you doing over there?

[00:03:05]>> I really believe that. um picking the wrong men. And until I recently started watching your show, I realized the difference in quality of men. And I've been doing a lot of self-reflecting and trying to figure out why. Because I get hit on a lot by different men, different quality men. Every race you can think of doesn't >> Okay. But one thing one thing one thing that doesn't change, right or wrong, man. If it's it's called a husband.

[00:03:33]If you had a husband first and you and your womb was closed until you had a husband, then there's no wrong man.

[00:03:42]There's just sex partners, >> right? And that goes back to your topic as far as why do you know why are white women getting black men? I personally feel like it has something.

[00:03:58]>> You're saying that when when you grew up, it was harder for you to date black men because of the part of country you lived in. But >> yeah, they they preferred >> But you but you messed around and got four sons uh from black men. So you found some somewhere. Um but no husband.

[00:04:19]Um and I'm like, >> this is the thing.

[00:04:22]>> Huh?

[00:04:23]This is the thing and I would to answer your question. I think it has a lot to do with the upbringing and some of the things that black women go through at a very young age. Now, I'm not making up any excuses. I'm only speaking from personal experience.

[00:04:37]>> Okay.

[00:04:37]>> The the first person the first black man that I encountered was 10 years older than me. Um, I was young, kind of came from a broken family. Didn't really know no better. Was trying to find my way.

[00:04:49]>> Your mom let you date a man 10 years older than you?

[00:04:53]Um, my mom wasn't really present. She wasn't present. She >> She wor night night shift. And >> your mom wasn't present.

[00:05:02]>> How old were you?

[00:05:03]>> She was not. Yeah, she was not. How old was I?

[00:05:06]>> Mhm.

[00:05:07]>> Um, I was about 16.

[00:05:11]>> So, you dating a 26?

[00:05:12]>> 17. I had my first child.

[00:05:14]>> Oh, you was dating a 26 year old man.

[00:05:19]>> Yes. I was my mom was man that's statuto I was kind of on my own >> but ma'am that's statuto yeah you're right yeah it was >> but you had I've been 16 you knew what's you knew not to be dating no 26 year old man >> I can I can hear I can hear ma'am here's the thing you weren't born on the moon you were born in the same country I was born you born in the same country I was you had ABCs just like I did. You No, you were just fast. Fast out here doing what the hell you want.

[00:05:58]>> I didn't I didn't really have any doubt.

[00:06:01]>> Okay. Okay. Whatever it's called, ma'am.

[00:06:02]You were 16 with a 26-y old. You You knew that was not right, but you did it anyway. That's cool.

[00:06:11]>> I learned that it was not right, >> ma'am. You knew that was not right. Oh, no. No. Don't over talk. No, no. You cannot tell me that this man could come up to the high school and pick you up.

[00:06:22]>> I didn't meet him in the high school.

[00:06:24]>> Doesn't matter. He couldn't come to pick you up.

[00:06:29]You cannot tell me you could have walked around in public with a 26-year-old saying, "This is my boyfriend at 16."

[00:06:35]They have locked his ass up.

[00:06:40]>> Let me just say that he was not He was He was in a street life. living a street life.

[00:06:47]>> I don't give a [ __ ] I'm saying that you knew you shouldn't be dealing with a 26 year old.

[00:06:54]>> You knew that.

[00:06:55]>> I knew.

[00:06:56]>> Then stop talking about how I was raised and this and that. Yeah, you may have been raised jacked up. So what? 16 and you were people. Look, man, I hear people say this all the time. Your mama was only supposed to raise you till 18.

[00:07:10]So that's only two more years. You can drive a car, meaning you could commit murder. You knew better than dating a 26 year old. You knew better than laying down and making babies.

[00:07:20]>> Since I was 13, >> I don't care if you was on your own since you were 11.

[00:07:29]You still know the difference between an adult and a kid.

[00:07:40]Why am I do why am I saying this, man?

[00:07:42]because I'm still still saying yes, you may have had a rough upbringing. What's the name of your therapist?

[00:07:52]>> Um, I don't have a theor therapist at the moment.

[00:07:56]>> Have you ever had you ever had a licensed clinician?

[00:08:01]>> Yes.

[00:08:02]>> When?

[00:08:03]>> Yes, I have.

[00:08:05]Um, I want to say the last time was probably about maybe three years ago.

[00:08:13]>> How long did you see that person?

[00:08:14]>> Um, after that it's been counselors.

[00:08:16]>> How long did you see that person?

[00:08:18]>> How long did you see that person? The clinician.

[00:08:21]>> Um, probably for like two years.

[00:08:24]>> All right.

[00:08:25]>> Cuz some I mean some other things happened in my life.

[00:08:27]>> All right. All right. Hold on. Pop your brakes. Pop your brakes. Pop your brakes. Pop your brakes. You're still 41. You got four kids.

[00:08:34]And I'm still trying to you, like it or not, you got to cobble this together to make some part of a life out of it. Your mama didn't raise you. Didn't get what you supposed to did.

[00:08:42]>> You need therapy. You need help. And and that's what it comes right down to. But at the end of the day, >> stop making babies out of wedlock.

[00:08:50]That's what we need to be telling. And I hope you're preaching to your sons.

[00:08:53]Don't do this because this is a cycle.

[00:08:57]>> Oh my. Thank God I don't have no grandb babies.

[00:09:00]>> Oh, >> there. I mean, three of them are over the age of 18. 18.

[00:09:05]>> Are you in a relationship right now?

[00:09:08]>> I was in a six-year relationship.

[00:09:10]>> Are you in a relationship right now?

[00:09:12]>> Months ago.

[00:09:12]>> Are you >> No, I'm just working on myself.

[00:09:16]>> And the person you relationship, the person you were [ __ ] talking to me. What is wrong with you?

[00:09:25]>> I'm sorry. It's a little muted. I'm sorry.

[00:09:29]The person you were in a relationship was the child's Was that your child's father?

[00:09:35]>> No.

[00:09:37]>> So, you had a fourth baby and then you went and got another dude.

[00:09:44]>> Um, >> yes.

[00:09:47]>> I'm confused.

[00:09:49]>> You got four sons?

[00:09:52]>> Yes.

[00:09:53]>> Your youngest is 11?

[00:09:57]>> Yes. You had a six-year relationship nine months ago.

[00:10:03]>> Yeah. So, I got in that relationship.

[00:10:05]>> You got a six-year relationship nine months ago. End of nine months ago.

[00:10:10]>> Yeah.

[00:10:11]>> That person was not your 11 year old's f.

[00:10:16]>> No. No.

[00:10:17]>> Then you went and got another dude.

[00:10:21]>> That's Stop. Stop.

[00:10:24]>> You don't need to be dating no more.

[00:10:27]None.

[00:10:28]>> Okay.

[00:10:29]>> Your factory is closed. You're not in the right frame of mind to be dealing with anybody. No. Nothing.

[00:10:40]You got to get you on track. Cuz at 41, you're not an old woman. You can still do damage out here. And you got an 11 year old to raise.

[00:10:49]You're making men. And often times, women make the very men that that other women despise.

[00:10:56]You're still trying to do what you're going to do for you and you got kids to raise.

[00:11:02]>> You stopped. You need to You need to worry about this boy becoming a competent. Is he Is he doing is he making A's and B's?

[00:11:10]>> He's an honoral student.

[00:11:12]>> Good.

[00:11:12]>> 11y old. And um >> my 18-year-old, he's still a senior, but >> he's doing well as well. Play football.

[00:11:18]>> He's a what? He's a what?

[00:11:21]>> He's a senior >> in high school.

[00:11:23]>> My 18-year-old is a senior. Yes.

[00:11:25]>> Okay. Um, yeah. Stop dating.

[00:11:29]Yeah, that. Yeah, slow that one down.

[00:11:31]>> I agree.

[00:11:32]>> And And I gotta say this, man.

[00:11:35]>> Why are you wearing a do-agg?

[00:11:37]>> Huh?

[00:11:38]>> Why you wearing a do-agg?

[00:11:41]>> I can't hear you.

[00:11:42]>> Why you wearing a do-agg?

[00:11:45]>> Oh, um, well, I'm supposed to be sleeping because I get up at 6:45. Okay.

[00:11:50]I mean, 5 in the morning.

[00:11:51]>> It's your It's your night. It's your night time stuff. didn't want to miss your show.

[00:11:55]>> Okay, that's why I asked.

[00:11:57]>> That's why I asked. That's why I as like it is late time. So, all right.

[00:12:00]>> Don't worry, it's late under there, but I didn't want to be on here, but I really wanted I'm trying to learn as much as I can from you.

[00:12:06]>> Okay. Well, uh, stop dating. Stop dating. Get back in therapy. Do the work.

[00:12:12]>> No more babies.

[00:12:14]>> No, I'm done. I've been done. He was my last one. I'm just trying to figure out where to go from here. Uh >> and I think that you have a lot of knowledge.

[00:12:21]>> Yeah. Go you go you you go you talking go get a pacifier over talking. She might there might be a delay. But yeah man when I hear somebody with all these kids I'm like we a lot of people are going to hear this call and try to turn it into a sympathy story but Kevin kept dragging it back to the same place. Choices. At some point, the pattern is the pattern. Four kids, three fathers, no husband, and still talking about what men prefer. That's backwards.

[00:12:56]And this is what a lot of modern dating conversations turn into. Women will talk all day about trauma, upbringing, environment, and what they went through.

[00:13:05]But the scoreboard still exists. Life keeps count even when feelings want a reset button. Fellas, this is why discipline matters when choosing who gets access to your life. Stop looking at potential and start looking at outcomes. A woman's past decisions tell you how she thinks under pressure, how she chooses men, and whether she understands consequences. Some men hear a sad story and immediately want to rescue. That savior mindset ruins a lot of men. And ladies, the world is not grading on effort anymore once children are involved. Men look at structure, stability, peace, accountability. A man with options is not signing up to clean up years of unresolved chaos just because somebody finally became self-aware at 41. That's the harsh reality nobody wants to say out loud.

[00:14:00]Men are judged by what they build. Women are judged by what they preserve. And once the foundation gets cracked enough times, people stop looking at intentions and start looking at results. If you stay locked in, hit like, subscribe, and drop your thoughts below. And keep supporting Kevin Samuels original channel. That's how his message stays in circulation.