Parents Are Reinforcing Public Toddler Tantrums Without Realizing It

Added: 2026-05-16

[00:00:00]Parents are accidentally reinforcing public tantrums and most don't even know they're doing it. The following clip gives us a glaring example.

[00:00:10]>> No, don't pull it tail. No, you don't need to >> come on.

[00:00:39]And before anyone comments, yes, I know that toddlers naturally melt down and cry. That's not the issue. The issue is what parents teach next. I'm Miss Brandy. I help aggressive kids calm down. and the parents and professionals take the power back. The second this little girl starts screaming, the entire energy of her parents shifts to panic and pacifying. They immediately start trying to soothe, feed, distract, and negotiate with her. And this teaches a very powerful lesson. If I scream loud enough, my parents lose control. This is how screaming becomes communication and public meltdowns gain power. And this is how kids start learning. They can emotionally control environments. So what should happen next? You calmly walk her outside. You make eye contact and in a serious tone you say, "We are sitting out here until you calm down and then you wait." And this is where planned ignoring becomes very important. You're ignoring the performance of the meltdown because attention is fuel. And before people comment, "This is just toddlers," remember this is where bigger behavior patterns begin. Kids learn very early whether or not their parents mean what they say and follow through. If screaming consistently changes the environment, removes demands, gains attention, and makes adults panic, the brain remembers that. So, the behavior grows, and the pattern forms. How would you have handled this toddler's public tantrum? Please share it in the comments and follow for real behavior strategies and the truth parents and professionals need to hear.