The lives of the prophets serve as living maps of the human heart, demonstrating how to heal emotional suffering through patience, resilience, and spiritual connection with Allah. Islamic psychology teaches that humans have four basic weaknesses (hedonistic pleasures, aggressive impulses, deception, and narcissism) that can be overcome through the prophetic examples of controlling emotions, forgiving enemies, and maintaining hope during trials. The prophets' stories provide practical psychological guidance for managing grief, anger, temptation, and emotional burnout, with Prophet Muhammad (sallallahu alaihi wasallam) serving as the best example in every emotional dimension.
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Psychological Lessons from the Lives of the Prophets #2 by Prof. Dr. Süleyman DerinAdded:
Yes, brother.
Let's start proof.
>> Yeah, you can start now.
>> Okay.
Every one of us carries weight the world never sees. A grief we cannot name. A fear that visits at night. A hope we are almost afraid to hold. The question is not whether the soul suffers. The question is how it heals. And long before psychology had a name, the prophets of God were already teaching humanity the deepest answers to the question.
And very good morning and a warm welcome to all of you joining us on YouTube and Zoom from across the world. On the behalf of the international Islamic University thought and civilization stick student society, it is my honor to welcome you to the second session of our Islamic theology, philosophy and metaphysics series titled psychological lesson from the lives of the prophet prophet sallall alaihi wasallam. My name is Malik Sedwal, president of the IST student society and a PhD candidate here at ISTec and it is my privilege to moderate today's session. In our first session, we opened a door the idea that the lives of the prophets are not only sacred history but a living map of the human heart. How it breaks, how it endures, and how it is restored. Today in session two of three, we go deeper.
Before we begin, two quick notes. For those on Zoom, please keep your microphones muted during the talk. Uh we will open the floor for questions in the final portion of the session. So do keep them ready. You may post them in question and answer chat box as they come to you and I will bring them to our speaker. For those watching on YouTube, your questions in the live chat are equally welcome and we will do our best to include them as well. It is now my greatest pleasure to introduce our convenor and speaker. Professor Dr. Sulman Din is a distinguished scholar and authent a authority on Sufiism and psychological dimensions of Islam. A field that sits precisely where the spiritual traditions meets the inner life of human being. He serves as visiting professor here atteum and brings to this series a rare combination of classical depth and contemporary relevance. Few scholars can speak to both the ru and the mind with such clarity. Today he turns that lens onto the prophets themsself. what their trials, their patience and their hope can teach us about our own psychology.
Professor Din, the floor is yours.
Allah, maybe you can close your mic.
>> Okay.
>> Dear brothers, sisters, dear colleagues.
I am very happy to be with you. Uh this is my second lecture on uh how can you benefit from the prophets in terms of psychology psych psychological lessons from the lives of the prophets. You can see my slides.
Okay. So I just want to summarize what we have done in my first lecture. uh as you know uh this is uh trying to bring psychology from the lives of the prophets and this is very important to benefit from the prophets because Allah Almighty says in the holy Quran we relate to you oh Muhammad the best of stories in what we have revealed to you of this Quran although you were before it among the unaware.
So why Allah Almighty is revealing these uh stories of the prophets to uh our prophet? It is here again you know explained and relate to you all prophet the stories of the messengers to reassure your heart to make prophet's heart stronger reassure his heart so I believe these stories also will assure our hearts uh as you know it has been used in psychology ology, storytelling and stories as symbols of uh spiritual healing and Milton Erikson is almost father of storytelling in psychology also or Sufis like Roomie and Alazali are often using this uh in their therapies.
Uh why prophets are example to us?
Because we know all prophets are infallible which means they don't commit grave sins. They might make little zah little mistakes but they are immediately corrected Allah by Allah Almighty.
hands. Hands we can take their emotional life, their uh sacrifice, their patience, resilience, their all kind of uh reactions to their uh communities as our emotional and spiritual compass.
Remember I talked prophetam of course this is the depiction of Adam by Darwin's philosophy. uh coming from monkey caveman and becoming full human being. This is of course we don't accept in Islam. In Islam we believe that Allah Almighty created man Adam in the best form. So this depiction is unfortunately everywhere and unfortunat also it is in psychology accepted. So man has no soul.
It is it has only brain and brain is more developed than other animals.
Otherwise there is no difference between uh human beings and animals and Skinner he's a behaviorist psychologist in USA he says we are no different than the oxen we slaughter and eat of course now dear brothers and sisters dear colleagues we are about to celebrate in few days inshallah you know these slaughter animals they are made subservient to us because We are the highest form of creation in this earth and other forms of creation.
The animals, the plants, the vegetables, the fruits are here to serve us. This how Allah created. So we are not equal with monkeys, with donkeys, with mice.
You know this is uh not true.
I am going a little bit quickly inshallah analyzing and in man's nature we have four uh we have four uh basic uh what do you call it weaknesses which is called we have honistic pleasures hedonistic drives aggressive impulses aggressive drives killing harming which is called sabuya.
And as you know, Freud just discovered these two and he became the father of psychology. But Gazali has two more weaknesses to add to this, you know, theory. Shayania, deception and trickery. We take Shayan as an example.
Cheating, deceiving other people and showing a different face. You know when we hate someone we show him or her a loving and smiling face. This is only uh for us other animals other creation they don't uh you know look like this. They are not hypocrites. So you know this is uh another u motivation for our behavior and which is the worst case scenario uh which is uh you know narcissism seeking dominions oppression claiming divinity and uh these are four basic weaknesses that Allah gave all of us so as so as uh we can uh what you say it uh we are being tested with these uh weaknesses. So please remember I love this explanation of Gazali how he is explaining man's nature. This is very very uh important.
I am going as I said actually in Adam again Allah almighty is telling the angels that when Allah said to the angels I will place a successor on earth they asked will it cause corruption and bloodshed and Allah replied I know what you don't so uh here Allah almighty describing man as a khalifa which is a very uh special uh place in the divine realm.
Alhamdulillah, we have such a we carry such a significance in the eyes of Allah Almighty. And of course, Shayan was jealous of man. So jealousy also narcissism are the two significant negative emotions that we see even Adam came to the earth in paradise. Shayan have these feelings and our famous room is saying that the man sold himself cheaply not patching himself with the clo of truth. So here when he says we sold ourselves cheaply equating man to animals is really selling ourselves very cheaply. You see we have such a high value in the eyes of Allah but some people insist that we are equal to oxen equal to you know uh monkeys. This is a big mistake in our understanding in Islamic psychology.
Of course, we have Shayan in Adam because Shayan whispered to Adam, shall I show you the tree of eternity and eternal kingdom? And of course, in this way, he caused corruption. uh you know he caused that Adam had to leave paradise because of him. So this is very uh you know important to know that Shayan is our enemy. Unfortunately there is no Shayan in psychology today. People think you know whatever is going on inside it's in our brain. As a matter of fact, today the center of man in psychology is brain. But we believe it is not the brain, it is the soul. So more than brain, we have the soul or conscience and our soul is the main actor in Allah in our Islamic psychology. But unfortunately today uh you know western psychology rejects believing in shayan believing in the soul which are two very important actors.
I spoke about jealousy and envy before deadly emotions because uh Kabil son of Adam killed Habil another his brother.
So the first killing was out of jealousy. So it is deadly emotion.
uh and you know I am going very quickly story of the the longest period of resilience we see in the life of Alisam he lived almost a thousand years and rejected always you know by his community even then he never gave up his hope he never lost you know his courage uh so Uh the lesson we have to take from here is maybe whatever uh uh you know the length of our suffering we should never lose our hope. God can move uh ships on earth on the mountains you know and save us believers anytime he wants.
Again here I remember I talk about how to cut off uh people because uh Ibraisam was begging Allah Almighty that Kenan his son is a member of his family and Allah promised him to save his family but Kanan was a non-believer. He didn't you know embark on the ark. So in front of his very eyes his son Kenan was drowned and you know Allah Almighty warned him that he is not a member of your family.
So uh here we learn how to cut off some toxic people from our lives. Even it might be our very close uh you know family members or sons, daughters or wives or husbands. If they go exceed the limits Allah Almighty you know commanded there is no need to be sad for them. If they really want to you know uh do some evil things we cannot prevent them. We can only control ourselves. We cannot control our relatives or kids or uh you know spouses. So there is no need to be very sad. And here Allah Almighty is warning you know that he was entitled of unrighteous conduct. So do not ask me about what you have no knowledge of. I warn you so you don't fall into ignorance. This is very clear uh you know warning that we shouldn't uh you know waste our lives uh feeling you know sad grief or on our friends or relatives if they do something bad. Of course our job is to correct them to advise them but at the end of day every single person has you know free will and after that we remember we talk about story of Yakobis this is very important because in Yakub Alisam's story we learn how to express our grief because in this life we can uh you experience all kind of emotions, grief, sadness, loss, loss of our kids, babies, you know, or uh you know uh family members, anything can happen to us but nothing should break or resistance or you know uh strong belief in Allah Almighty. You know the first thing I would like to say here in some cultures they say men never cry. This is wrong.
Men, women, as Muslims, we can feel our pain and our loss. Here we see that Yakob Alisam even lost his eyes because he always cried after his loss, his beloved son Yusam. The Holy Quran informs that he turned away from them lamenting Allah's poor Yufu and his eyes turned right out of the grief he suppressed. So here there is no uh you know uh kind of uh seeing it as a mistake by Allah Almighty. Allah Almighty is narrating us that uh Yakob Alisam lost his eyes. But there's one important thing here. Yes, we can feel sad, grief, but what he says, I complain of my anguish and sorrow only to Allah and I know from Allah what you don't know.
Soam was complaining his grief to Allah not from Allah or not about Allah to other human beings. This is very important you know we can feel the grief but we should never say anything which will displease Allah Almighty. So here we learned that it is okay to mourn which is sometimes in Islamic culture we say brother be patient don't cry just be patient this is test from Allah yes it's a test from Allah but we are human beings we have hearts so uh this is quite important uh and again of course the story ofam is very important because in this story uh as allah says uh verse 111 and indeed in the stories of the prophets there are lessons for people of reasonab this is very important and of course from there are so many emotions you know betrayal loss uh sadness imprisonment whatever you imagine mashallah almost everything is present in the life of yamam so This story is particularly important for those who lost beloved ones in their families or who are imprisoned you know uh with no crimes they committed maybe out of slander uh and many people today in prisons especially in the western countries unfortunately some Muslims are imprisoned for some false terrorism charges you know no good justification But alhamdulillah even today so many prisons now are working very hard to make dawa and a lot of inmates inmates are becoming Muslim. So we have examples from the story of Yuisam we talk about dreams dreams are very important in prophet's time whenever they prayed the fajger prayer the prophet sallall alaihi wasallam turn back and uh ask the companions did anyone see a dream today and you know he would uh kind of uh explain the dreams uh interpret the dreams But today this art of interpreting dreams is little bit ignored.
Some psychology people are using it. But most of the psychology people today they reject these dreams saying that these are the firings without any purpose in our brain which is not true or repetition of our daytime experiences.
That is possible of course. We called it.
Some dreams are like that. But also there are some dreams who are giving us good news from the unseen. Uh also it's good for therapy.
Controlling sexual desires is a big problem nowadays. uh modern technology, you know, uh social media and films and you know, pornography is becoming a big problem for Muslims. Here yisam has been tested in the worst case scenario.
Imagine a young man with full desires as a man for the opposite sex and he's a slave. He has no free will. He's in a palace under lock. Also the lady who invites him tempts him is a very beautiful lady. So can you imagine any scenario where things can be worse than this? You're a slave. You have to follow whatever your master commands you locked up. young man, not like a very old man in 50s, 60s, 80s, in maybe in his, you know, of 20s, very handsome, you know. But even then, what did he say?
My lord, prison is better than what they want from me. If you do not turn away their plan, I may incline toward them and become one of the ignorant. Here we see yallam is paying the price. He is choosing the worst case scenario that even you imprison me. I will not follow these temptations. And actually dear brothers, sisters, dear colleagues, dear young young men, young women, this is a very good lesson for us. You know, inshallah we as Muslims control our morality, our sexual urges. And of course in Islam in Islamic psychology alhamdulillah unlike other religions we advise marriage as a solution for this kind of you know problems because in Buddhism in Christianity uh they believe that uh a single life is a good life. You can be a better Christian a better Buddhist better Hindu. I don't know about Hinduism that much but mostly apart from Judaism and Islam people in other uh religions uh advise a single uh life uh you know the monks the nuns they don't get married so this is called celibate life in Islam we don't have this so whatever Allah gave us as emotions desires feelings they are all necessary uh feelings and emotions.
For example, we have anger.
Uh if we didn't have any anger, we wouldn't defend ourselves. We wouldn't defend our countries. If we didn't have desire for food, we would die out of starvation. If we don't have sexual desires, uh we wouldn't produce offspring. So these are all necessary emotions. But Islam is advising us to use all these emotions in balance. You know sexual desires are only fulfilled in legal boundaries in halal boundaries in marriage of the opposite sex. Of course, I will maybe touch upon this subject of uh you know uh this uh lesbian and gay life is forbidden in Islam totally and as Muslims we don't follow uh such illegal haram paths. So infallam's story we are learning uh how to control all these emotions. And again another thing I love in this story is uh how yallam after so many years of suffering he suffered all kind of things he was pushed into a dry well so as he dies in pain he is tortured then he was sold as a a slave in young age can you imagine a young boy imagine the trauma he suffered so much then being a slave in a palace.
He was tempted by Zlea. Then he was surrendered.
He was imprisoned for so many years. You know what can be worse than this? Almost everything happened in his life. And of course the brothers are you know behind all this pain. But what did he say? And imagine uh Yusam when he forgave them he was in a position of almost being a king, a minister of treasure. He had authority.
He had uh you know soldiers under his command. He was rich. He was powerful.
And this time his brothers who pushed him into a dry well came as beggars.
Poor nothing in their hands, very little money to buy some food. Yam if he wanted he would torture them take his revenge you know but he didn't do what did he say no reproach on you today may Allah forgive you he is the most merciful of the merciful here dear brothers and sisters sometimes it is very difficult to control or desire to take revenge especially when we are powerful and or enemy is weak. But here we learn forgiveness is the best option. And our prophet sallallaihi wasallam also always forgive his enemies. You know most of the time of course there are some special cases he didn't forgive but most of the time he was the best example of forgiving his enemies. Inshallah in our family lives, in our uh you know uh professional lives, in our friendships, uh we should choose this uh you know uh path of uh forgiving others.
And of course I spoke about prophetisam.
He was the richest man on earth. Even today no one can be his equal because no one can speak to animals today. He will speak to hood hood the birds uh to bring intelligence from his enemies from his environment. He would talk to an ant. He would you know ride upon the wind. He would command the wind. He will he would control the gins. You know he has uh almost limitless powers of course given by Allah almighty as a test. Dear brothers and sisters, every power, every sickness, every calamity is a test.
There is no, we cannot say calamities are bad or blessings are good. It all depends how we use them. If you are patient when you have big calamities, you are rewarded. If you have a lot of blessings and if you don't fulfill the rights of the poor, you know, then they will be a sin on you. So everything is a test from Allah Almighty and Sonam has such a immense power that no one can be his equal. Even the prophet wasallam he said one day he said I saw a gin in the masid. I want to catch and bind him to the pillars of the masid so that you can see it but then I remembered the prayer of my brother Sulman. What is his prayer? He had a special prayer.
Suan said, "My Lord, forgive me and grant me a kingdom no one after me will have. Indeed, you are the most merciful." Here the say why prayed in that way? Is it out of selfishness?
Is it that he's jealous that other people have the same powers like him?
Here very interesting explanation taps is that the the most difficult thing is for us to control uh our uh you know uh desires, willpower when we are really powerful when we have all kind of things under our command. So it is so difficult realizing how difficult it was to control yourself when you are rich when you have power to control so many things. Therefore he prayed that ya Allah don't give this kingdom so many powers to other people because people after me will be maybe weak and they will abuse their power. So this is very important here again loved horses and today we are using horses in therapies very shortly it's called hypotherapy you know uh for emotional reflection building trust stress reduction actually I take my kids to ride horses I myself uh cannot ride them very well because they are so big you know sometimes when you ride a horse it's so big it is difficult to control but when you uh get accustomed to it in young ages it is really a good therapy for the kids.
So the lesson we learn from this story is that worldly wealth and power can align with spirituality.
But why we have only two prophets as king prophets and very powerful su alam and his father dah alisam and the rest of the prophets are poor suffering all kind of sicknesses tortures social rejection you know fear because uh this shows that rich Muslims will be very few most of the Muslims will be suffering hence Allah gave very few examples in the holy Quran That's my uh comment. If you want to please uh contribute, I am very open. Uh by the way, this is a new project. Uh dear brothers, sisters, dear colleagues, dear friends, I started uh with Malik Rahim when he was in stumble in his last few years. We started this project of how can we benefit from the stories of uh prophets but he passed away Allah.
Hence alhamdulillah I continue this uh project myself now. Alhamdulillah. And inshallah uh you know I I am planning to go through every prophet and how can we benefit from them in controlling our uh emotions you know is very interesting so far all the prophets were patient resilient they have all successful successfully completed their missions but there's an exception Yusam uh he had kind of emotional burnout. He was so much overwhelmed by frustration uh you know at the residence of his people. He uh left his mission earlier than he was commanded and as a punishment he was swallowed up by a big fish a whale. We don't know uh the kind of the fish uh but you see here uh that prophets this shows to us uh all prophets are also human beings they suffer they feel what we feel they feel anger they feel uh exhaustion emotional burnout but uh what we learn from here the prophets always when they committed a minor mistake. They immediately remembered Allah and made Toba turn back. Dear brothers and sisters, sometimes we see people around us using drugs, doing some very bad things. We never should lose our hopes from these people. One day they can inshallah make Toba uh and come back.
But the important thing here is that they should accept their uh mistakes.
Some problem some people unfortunately today they defend their uh problems.
They defend uh you know fornication.
They defend LGBTQ. They defend using you know alcohol or uh you know taking interest from banks. So as long as uh we accept uh you know or sins as sins there's always a hope as in the case of he's first saying there is no god but you ya Allah he's praising Allah almighty and after that he is admitting that I have committed injustices to my own soul. all by uh not fulfilling my mission by leaving uh you know my mission earlier than you have commanded to me. So here there's no denial no projection no victim narrative. I think this is very important today as Muslims sometimes you know we play the victim.
Oh, you know what? I was under difficult conditions. You know, uh I was living in the west, in USA, in Germany, you know, there's so much temptation around. Oh, I am in business without interest, how can I make business, you know, or if I have a store, a restaurant, uh without selling alcohol, how can I make profit?
uh you know if there's some problem in our job as Roomie is saying in a beautiful poetry he says you are trying to change the holy Quran the explanation of the holy Quran and he says oh my brother don't change the Quran change yourself you know no need to change the holy Quran change yourself if Allah is saying alcohol is haram it is forbidden we should follow it if interest is ribba is haram we should follow it. We don't uh try to change the commandment. Especially psychology today. Unfortunately, people psychologist sometimes you know these psychology is a science. It's a positive science. Nothing to do with religion.
LGBTQ is okay because it is our hormones. No, we have all hormones. We have the hormones of a killer, hormones of a cheater, hormones of a liar and everything. But uh as Muslims we resist against these urges we don't follow them blindly. We you know first check the holy Quran. If it is haram to eat something for example eating uh pig uh you know pork don't eat it. Oh we don't you know say oh it is okay in old days there was no hygiene today there's hygiene. No, if something is haram, there's no need to change it.
So, we always see here a post, you know, crisis growth in every prophet. They go through h all kind of difficulties but always after that uh you know they recover and they grow.
So, return to your mission is very important. How many times you fail, you never give up.
And of course the story of Musa Alisam is very important. If I am not wrong, I think we we stopped there last time.
Musa Alisam is one of the prophets who has been mentioned the most in the holy Quran. And there are very interesting things here. Of course, we are not after the full story, but we are more after the psychological uh lessons we can take uh from this prophet. And when I was Malikah, I heard I learned this uh you know technique from him. This is a technique that holy Quran is using gradual desensitization.
It's very interesting uh that you know some people uh fear lions, wolves, snakes. It is very natural you know it is nothing to do with your piety. If you're a very pious Muslim you are uh you know not supposed to fear maybe some enemies of Islam but you know you have no right to for example escape from the battlefield. You have to fight. But if you are escaping from a snake uh from a tiger that is uh very human and here Allah Almighty is teaching in detail how Musa Alisam had a natural dislike of snakes you know some people are not afraid of snakes people in India they are playing with snakes you know they're okay but Musa Alisam had special you know fear of snakes And before he met uh Pharaoh, his magicians, Allah Almighty is gradually desensitizing his fear of snakes by how he says says what do you have in your right hand? Oh Moses and says he aside, this is my stick, my stuff. When Allah Almighty commands him, throw your stuff, it turns into a big scary snake, a serpent.
And of course, when Musa Alisam saw it, you know, he escaped and he even didn't turn back.
And Allah Almighty reassured him, "Oh, Musah, come back and do not fear.
Indeed, you are safe." in chapter kas.
So Musa Alisam came back and took his stuff back into his hand and turned into a staff again. You know in that way Allah Almighty showed him how to control his fear of snakes. So uh this is called gradual desensitization.
uh you know if you are uh for example have anxiety and fear of heights so they take you to first floor of a tall building a skyscriber then the second floor you look outside you know gradually third floor fourth floor then mashallah in Koalaur we have so many high-rising buildings 40 you know 30 40 floors then at the very end You go up top of the building and you look down from the 30th floor and of course because it's a gradual so you learn how to control your fears that technique was mashallah says Malikah you know understood it from the holy Quran and of course when Mus Alam met the magicians of Pharaoh of course he defeated them. Uh and he even then it's interesting when the magicians throw their ropes and they became snakes.
Allah almighty says Musa Alisam even then he feared but he concealed his fear within himself. So you know the nature doesn't change immediately.
We should be patient. We shouldn't hurry. But the important thing here is you know controlling our fears. Kazali is always saying uh that therapy is by its opposites. If you are not courageous, you accompany courageous people. You join the army. You try to you know fight in the front lines. If you are miserly, you go with generous people. You learn how to spend money from them. you take your friends to restaurant or whatever you know. So uh we in Islam in Islamic psychology we try everything but it is uh opposites.
The second problem emotional problem Musa Alisam had is anger. You remember Alisam was very forgiving prophet. He forgave all his big brothers. Even though they tried to kill him, they caused so much immense suffering for him. But what did he say at the end? He said, "There's no blaming on you today. There is no blame on you today. I forgive all of you." But Musam had anger problem when he came back.
from the uh TA when he saw his people worshiping the cal he was almost killing his brother Harun. Harun was a very his big brother as well as he's a very soft person. He was shaking his head you know you know dragging him by the beard and he said yeah oh my son of my mother please stop it. He had to back him. So Musa Alisam even throw his tablets that God gave him. You know he was some anger problem.
Remember uh he killed the Egyptian when we when he was involved in the fight. So he was powerful uh physically a powerful prophet uh with some anger. Uh therefore you know Allah Almighty told him very interesting chapter ta verse 43 30 43 44 go to Pharaoh for he has crossed the limit speak to him gently perhaps he may be reminded of or fear Allah normally you know Pharaoh deserves all kind of horrible treatment and rough and you know bad treatment because he claimed to be a god but Allah Allah almighty telling Mus Alisamallam go and talk to him kindly and nicely. So what we understand here uh every emotion is treated every negative emotion is treated by its opposite and again we see in the life of uh Pharaoh Mus Alam there is a lady who is very pious exemplary and under very difficult conditions. Can you imagine?
She is the wife of Pharaoh. The most uh you know uh worst man on earth ever created because he claimed to be God. He killed thousands of thousands of thousands of uh children of Ben Israel.
Unfortunately, today the Jews are killing our Muslim brothers and sisters in Gaza. So the roles are now reversed.
uh so those who were victims in the past today uh became uh you know unjust people. So inshallah we pray that our brothers and sisters in Gaza uh will very soon attain peace uh freedom and all their rights are replaced inshallah we pray to Allah almighty in these holidays of just before inshallah. So look at the Pharaoh's wife Assa. He's an exemplary person mentioned in the holy Quran. So dear brothers and sisters, there's no justification uh to follow the uh the evil ways. Even you are wife of Pharaoh, even you are wife of a prophet, uh it doesn't matter.
At the end of day, we have freedom to choose.
One thing no one can take from our hands is freedom to choose.
Here Allah Almighty is giving the example of Pharaoh's wife.
Chapter verse 11.
Allah has set forth the example of the wife of Pharaoh for the believers. when he said, "My Lord, build for me near you a house in paradise and save me from Pharaoh and his deeds and save me from the wrongdoing people." So whatever is the condition, there's always a hope. Uh of course, even sometimes this hope is only in paradise. Yes, there's no salvation maybe saving yourself from the you know this calamity this big test but we believe as Muslims even we are killed and bombarded and tortured alhamdulillah we will attain paradise out of these stories I found some psychometric tests you know Musa Alisam he was such a strong man as I said he helped the daughters of Shahisam uh you know watering their sheep and one of the daughters probably the elderly daughter.
Uh when uh she was praising Musa Alisam to her father she said oh my dear father hire him a strong transported person is definitely the best to hire.
The second uh verse is related to susam when you know after so many slander imprisonment he saved himself from the prison and you know his innocence was understood by pharaoh or by the king of Egypt but he told him proposed put me in charge of those store houses of the And for I am truly reliable and knowledgeable. So here we have four characteristics.
When we want to employ someone, when we want to choose someone as our friend or as our spouse, when we want to marry, we can uh you know use the psychometric tests. First strength. A husband should be uh strong enough to protect er strong enough to earn enough money to look after his family. Also, he must be trustworthy.
A unreliable person you can't marry a cheater, a liar, you know, a hypocrite.
If you understand someone has these characteristics, please please please don't go close to him. Just even if you are engaged, give up the engagement. Of course, after marriage, this is a different issue. We should help them uh to defeat these bad characteristics. But before marriage, there's no, you know, uh reason to take risks. Just leave this relationship and reliability is very important. It is the same thing with trustworthiness and knowledgeable. You want to employ someone check his knowledge whether this person knows the job he has enough knowledge or no. So uh this is my modest understanding of psychometric.
How can we take psychometrics from the holy Quran? Of course this is open to as I said to new research. There are so many other characteristics as Muslims inshallah we should go deep in the holy Quran uh and learn more uh you know benefits uh to bring back to is inshallah uh psychology okay now or proam but before I go to wasallam. Ibraimisam wasn't in my uh program today. It wasn't in my uh plan.
But because uh you know it is uh uh zila the pilgrimage month I thought I should little bit speak about uh our father Ibraimisam father of all prophets. you know what kind of uh spiritual and psychological lessons we can take from his uh example. First thing Iraim is the close friend of Allah Almighty. Why?
Because he passed all the difficult tests. He was tested by his life. He was uh you know thrown into fire by Nimr and he didn't give up saying he didn't give up his dawa to you know he was tested you know to slaughter his son Ismael uh you know he tried to slaughter him and Allah of course gave another better option. A ram was slaughtered in his place. Alhamdulillah in few days we will be slaughtering sheep, ram, camels, cows. Here what does it mean to slaughter? Sometimes we forget the real story behind it. It is our attachments to wrong things. Sometimes we love our children uh almost equaling our love for family is equal to our love to Allah almighty. All other loves apart from Allah should be subservient to Allah's love, divine love. So we should love Allah in our heart, we should put place Allah in the highest corner of our heart and all other things below Allah. But sometimes you see we love our children uh we earn money for them. We don't pay our zakat you know when they do some uh wrong things don't warn them. Here we learn that this kind of attachment is a wrong attachment and actually as a matter of fact Gazali says hearts are to love Allah. Allah Almighty made us khalifa his vast on earth and created everything for us. The animals the satars whatever you imagine the rivers the trees the forest everything is for us but Gazali says we are for him. So everything should serve us and we should serve Allah. But sometimes unfortunately uh the vehicles the means become end in itself. We love money more than we love our religion. We love our children. We love our you know job sometimes and we do so many sacrifices needless sacrifices for our jobs for our families sometimes. And Ibraimisam is teaching us nothing should come between us and our religion or between the love of Allah and between our mundane loves.
So you know he was tested uh hence he was happy and uh you know ready to uh slaughter sacrifice his son. Actually here in the story of this sacrifice we also see a beautiful example in the story of Ismaam as a pious son he gave a remarkable uh you know answer when his father said oh my son I see in my dream that I sacrificed you to Allah what do you say he didn't say dad are you crazy don't believe your dreams you know I am your son how can you kill me just for the sake of a dream he say look at the his submission to divine will. Oh my father do as you are commanded you will find me if Allah wills among the patient. This is beautiful beautiful you know expression of uh submission to Allah's commandment.
Hence out of this submission surrender to divine will. Today we are in few days inshallah celebrating Eid of maybe the lessons we should take in this is we should you know purify our hearts from uh extreme love for the world for the family for money whatever or attachments. Everyone has a different attachment. We should check ourselves in this holidays. You know, if we have attachment to our money, uh we should give it up, pay our zakat, be more generous. If we love our wife more than we love our husband more than we love Allah, it's a big sin and calamity.
Hence, attachment is very important. The other important thing in Islamic psychology, other religions are sometimes choosing the easy way. So they have total detachment. As I said in the beginning of my talk, you should detach from the opposite sex. Never marry, have a c celate life. In you know monastic life, it is forbidden to possess any money. You can't have any money at all. It is forbidden. So uh this is total detachment in Islam. Uh we can have money, we can have family, we can have jobs, cars, houses. The important thing is not to attach ourselves to our possessions, not to be possessed by the world, not to be controlled by these worldly things. We should be always in control.
And uh this is the maybe most important psychological uh lesson we should take home today from the story of Ibraimisam or father and of course Hajisam or mother Hajar is another very important personality. Remember today I spoke about Assa the wife of Pharaoh and another beautiful example we have is she is an exemplary person. Imagine she had a newborn baby Ishmael and Ibraim or father left them in the desert in Mecca or Becca. No trees, no water, nothing, no food.
And imagine how desperate Hajar was. She was, you know, running between Safa and Marva. Because of such huge sacrifices, Allah made them eternal in his holy book Quran. As became eternal, Haj became eternal. Our father became eternal. So these are all examples, highest examples of sacrifice.
Hence dear brothers, sisters, we should submit to holy Quran to the commandments of holy Quran. Sometimes unfortunately uh we you know try to change for the sake of psychology. Some people are really attached to psychology so much so that they even give up the commandments of the holy Quran. Not among the Christian and Jews or non-Muslim psychologist even among the Muslim psychologists you know we should always check our knowledge check our professions with the criteria of the holy Quran if you're a family therapist you know you cannot give therapy without knowing the laws of family in the holy Quran what's the you know duties responsibilities of a husband a wife a son a daughter uh you know or if you are giving therapy in relationships we cannot cut off our parents for example.
Yes we can be very careful sometimes uh not to break their hearts but today unfortunately a lot of psychologist in the west especially they advise you know their customers to cut off their relationship with their parents. Why?
Because toxic parents, childhood trauma.
By the way, if child childhood trauma was valid, Ismaam would have the worst scenario, worst childhood trauma. Can you imagine? He was put under the, you know, the sharp knife. Yusfam was pushed into a dry well. So, of course, I am not saying these are okay. Yes, we always carry our past as a baggage, as a burden on our shoulders. But the prayers we pray, the holy Quran we read, we can uh heal these childhood wounds. There's no need to bring them all the time uh to the present time speak about them because many people when they go to psychologists they remember these uh bad experiences they had in their past and they cut off their families. So just to remind that please uh when we use psycho I'm not saying these are all bad no they are really valid some of them but please uh compare our knowledge check our knowledge with the you know commandments of the holy Quran if we are doing something bad just stop it please.
So today as last prophet of course is the the last prophet and by the way other prophets are examples in certain maybe things but proh is the best uh example in every emotion.
Maybe in forgiveness yisam is known as the best but noam has the same or even more forgiveness in his life. He has anger problem but he is controlling his anger more than other prophets. So our prophet is the best prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam.
Therefore dear brothers and sisters, anyone who is learning psychology or teaching psychology, we should have uh a good knowledge of s especially in terms of emotions. How the prophet was controlling his anger, his love, you know his fears, these are very important and today I will give inah few examples.
So the first thing in prophet's life is kindness uh you know to everyone around him to his family to his companions you know to non-Muslims to his enemies this very important and in Aliman this is very interesting verse Allah Almighty is saying that by the mercy of Allah you were gentle with them had you been harsh and hard-hearted they would have dispersed from around you. So forgive them, ask forgiveness for them and consult with them in the matter and when you have decided then place your trust in Allah. Indeed Allah loves those who placed their trust in him. So the prophet was the best of you know man. He is the best creation of Allah. But he Allah almighty is telling him uh kindness is very important even as a very you know important prophet if you showed harshness to your companions they will just leave you. So what we understand uh you know from this lesson is that we should be kind, nice, forgiving but of course uh is it is easy to say but very difficult to to do it.
And also a prophetam once he frowned upon a blind man. You know in chapter Abbasa we know the story. And here Allah Almighty is correcting his behavior warning him that he frowned and turned away because the because the blind man had come to him. But how do you know that perhaps he might purify himself or take heed and the advice might benefit him? So here my dear brothers, sisters, dear colleagues when we give therapy we should always prioritize those who are eager to listen to us.
When we choose our clients maybe you know we should choose the ones who need us most. Uh I was listening to a famous uh you know Turkish mom. He is giving therapy against gins. Every week he gathers uh people jama in the mosque and they recite chapter bakar. Bakar is by the way is the you know the one of the best suras to get rid of gins. It is very powerful surah and he was you know kind of complaining that some people who have no trouble at all with jeans they come to listen to him just in case they might one they have this trouble in future and he was telling please don't come to my you know gatherings don't come to the mosque if you have no problem of gins you know so only those people who suffer from uh these creatures should come to be. So sometimes you know we prefer maybe rich people over the poor or people with some uh you know place in this society. But here we learn we should always choose the people who need the therapy, who want it, who love it. So don't force yourself on the people uh who don't like you.
Again you know uh in the sayings of the prophetam we know that as a person we can naturally distinguish between good and evil. This is called you know alra.
Alfra is in our pure nature. We know bad is bad, good is good. Therefore even a little child when he do something bad or she do something bad he do it you know in secretly he don't he doesn't do it openly. Uh so uh look at the you know uh definition of sin or prophetam is describing sin. Sin is what causes discomfort in your chest and is something you want to hide from others.
Goodness on the other hand is what brings peace to your heart and satisfies you. So dear brothers, sisters, dear colleagues, when you feel tight in your chest when you do something, don't do it because there is an internal compass Allah Almighty place into our hearts whenever we do something bad, we get a warning from our soul. But of course some people they don't listen to their souls and in the way the soul is numbed the heart is hardened as the holy Quran says that their hearts became harder than the rocks for the ben is so if you don't follow your cut they call cut feelings in the long run you are losing it the says use it or lose it Actually another thing uh maybe we should learn there are so many prayers the sunnah prayers uh from the life of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam maybe we should even gather a prayer book for psychology people that these are psychological prayers for example an example Oh Allah, I seek refuge in you from sorrow and anxiety, from weakness and laziness, from coveress and misliness, from the burden of depth and from the oppression of people. So dear brothers and sisters, sometimes we think sadness is good. You know when you are sad it is okay, you are close to Allah. Uh no, there's no such thing in Islam. uh you know the prophetam is seeking refuge from these negative emotions. Of course, sometimes uh it is inevitable. We have to experience these things.
But normally I'm Muslim patient. Ya Allah give me poverty so I can show resilience. There is no need to say these things. As Muslims, we always ask from Allah a good health, you know, uh good family. But if things go other way around then we should ask help from Allah Almighty. Take refuge in him from grief. You know grief is not something good. Long-term grief make you sick.
Damage your health. Uh also uh you know laziness is a big problem today.
Unfortunately, we scroll, we watch social media, you know, we waste our lives and we get accustomed to become a lazy uh you know uh and weakness.
Sometimes we should never feel weak in front of any job. We should be always self-confidence you know. So all these emotions are negative emotions and it's not bravery to open ourselves to such dangers, we should always escape from dangers, you know, uh maybe is very interesting. If some people are putting us down, you know, oppressing us in our jobs, maybe even we should think of changing the job. Imagine your boss is always putting it down, you know, uh breaking your heart, not appreciating your success. You can't change your boss boss character. Maybe you can change your workplace. So these are the some of the emotions but there are many other a hadith.
Inshallah we try to learn this a hadith and you know whatever is the prophet is taking refuge in Allah we should also take refuge in Allah.
You know uh the prophetam was an human being like us when his uncle Hamza was killed, marted mutilated in the worst way unfortunately in the battle of Uhhood.
He swear by Allah if I achieve victory I will punish 70 of the enemy in the same way.
But of course Allah Almighty corrected him.
uh prophet. Oh my prophet when you punish people punish them in the same amount you suffered no more than if one person is killed kill the killer not 70 people. So you see here we see that our holy book Quran is correcting even the emotions and we see that also in companions sometimes companions came to prohman bin mas he came to prophetam he said yoolah you know my heart is telling me go to top of a mountain live like a monk you know dedicate your all life to worship of Allah.
Uh so what do you say and or prophet told him Islam there is no monkish life in Islam again he said I want to divorce my wife my heart is telling me divorce your wife dedicate all your life to God you know sometimes we have this emotions especially from religious perspective we want to dedicate all our lives to Allah to serving Allah the holy Quran that's okay but proam is advising also to look after our family, look after our wives, our children. You know, this was a part of religion. There's no uh monkish life in Islam. Hence, uh the companions whenever they had some extreme emotions, they went to the prophet and the prophet balanced their emotions. Therefore, sometimes as psychologists, as psychiatrists or you know, imams and scholars, we should uh balance the emotions of our uh know customers or or jama the congregation in the mosque. If people are for example using alcohol in certain areas in Turkey for example, the coast areas they use a lot of alcohol.
So we should tell them not to use alcohol. If some people have other inclinations, some people are very miserly in some parts they don't pay their zakat or in some agricultural areas they don't give their us from the crops you know then we should talk to them maybe talk more about generosity.
So uh you know uh these controlling uh emotions are very important. Uh inshallah we try our best to take the example of prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam.
Again uh anger control we learn from al gazali. He has a beautiful chapter alab.
Chapter is really talking in a big detail in three different levels. How can we control our anger? First biological level he says anger from Shayan. Shatan was created from fire and fire is extinguished with water. So when one of you gets angry let him perform ablution. Even this is good for non-Muslims. We tell them wash up go and have a cold shower. Then this is the first step biological. Then of course uh you know the second level is uh cognitive.
Gazali says when you get angry you become very ugly. You become like a wolf. You know look at yourself in the mirror you will dislike dislike yourself. You will give a lot of wrong decisions. When you are angry you will be pity forever for the you know uh wrong actions and wrong decisions uh you have given under anger. So he is persuading us that anger is bad. And third level of under control is spiritual.
This is only good for Muslims because uh you see Allah Almighty says in holy Quran they swallow up their anger which means they control their anger and they forgive and Allah loves those who do good. So this is only uh good for Muslims because when we forgive, when we control our anger, we don't take revenge, then Allah almighty inshallah will give us so much reward in the hereafter. Of course, Imm Raan says man is very miserly. We never give up something without something better in return. So Allah Almighty is telling us if you forgive, if you give up your rights, your anger, you will be given so much in the hereafter that you know uh so don't follow your anger, don't follow your desire to take revenge and you know whenever he listened to his people he had this deep listening attentive approach. Uh when he talk he said this man cannot be a king. He invests so emotionally in his followers.
No king could do this.
An elderly woman you know talked to prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam when he was working for an important job but the prophet listened to him. So he said you know this deep listening is very important. The prophet wasallam whenever he talk to someone he turned with his whole body and talk to person you know address the person with his whole body not just turning his face right or left. So this is very important. Sometimes you know we talk too much. We don't listen to others uh deeply especially with this modern technology. We listen uh someone with one ear with another ear we listen to some uh you know videos in our iPhone or in our smartphones you know. So deep listening unfortunately is something very rare today.
Last thing I would like to talk today is homosexuality and the example of prophetam.
This is psychology to this homosexuality in Islam is acceptable. Okay. when the people why the people of Lud Alisam was destroyed because they have done it on people who didn't want it. So they used force uh they raped men not because they were homosexual but because of rape. Of course these are nonsense we know that it is haram you know says I hate what you do. So you have the story here the verses of the holy Quran that he is offering his daughters for marriage give up my guests you know don't uh do this evil thing give it up but unfortunately people didn't listen to you know and they were destroyed because of that why I brought this is today very few countries uh you know in the world you can talk against homosexuality In Turkey, you can speak against it. In Malaysia, alhamdulillah, in Indonesia, you can speak against it. But many western countries, Australia, USA, Britain, Germany, you are not allowed to give therapy. Even someone comes with homosexual background. He says or she says, I want to, you know, get rid of this sickness. Please help me. If you help them, it's a crime. They take away your diploma. very sad. Unfortunately, that shows us without the holy Quran even the the worst you know things which are should be hated can be very normal.
So in the west it's so normal they uh you know advertise homosexuality in films in advertisements you can get better jobs uh in the companies in the government. Uh you know they have this positive what you call it uh uh help to homosexual people in the west but this is a big harams you see a nation was destroyed because of this.
How can we how can we accept it as something uh normal? Therefore uh my dear friends, colleagues uh we should never justify something bad. Allah almighty has fibbid in holy book. So psychology as business life as family life as the laws be under the you know control of the holy Quran. Uh also psychology should be under the control and guidance of holy Quran. There is no justification to say something to give therapy anti-Islamic ways and say claim that psychology is a separate uh science.
It's a positive science. No, because psychology cannot be a positive science because we can't see our souls. We can't touch our souls. We cannot dissect the soul in the laboratory. Yes. for our bodies. We can ask from a Christian, from a Jew, Jewish doctor, if I have a you know pain in my stomach, in my knees, anyone can cure me because it is a physical sickness. But anything spiritual without the commandment you know without the principles of the holy Quran or the principles of all proh sunnah uh we can be easily you know misguided.
So my last words, my last words, prophets are good examples to control our uh emotions you know uh and of course psychology is all about uh mental processes and emotions controlling your feelings. So prophets are the best examples. Uh they they have been tested in the worst case scenarios.
uh you know as I said betrayal, love, fear, temptation, any anything you imagine there's an example in the holy Quran inshallah we learn from the lives of the prophets from their emotional lives and take our examples from them of course the western psychology is doing something good uh in certain areas but we shouldn't follow them blindly We should always check new paradigms of psychological therapies with the holy Quran's principles. I thank you very much. Uh it's almost one and a half hours now. I would like to open uh discussion. Uh brother Malik maybe you can administer the process. Thank you.
>> Thank you. Thank you professor Din for a truly profound presentation.
What strikes me most is how the lives of the prophet became a mirror for our own inner struggles. We carry suffering, anger, desire, the need of forgive and in their lives, everyone of these is met and transformed into a ray of hope. We saw patience and unwavering trust in Allah in the hardest of times. In the long sorrow of Syodana Yakub and the trials of Syoduna Yusf Alisam who even when he finally held power over those who had wronged him chose the path of forgiveness and we are reminded that Syodna Sulleman despite his unmatched kingdom and authority reminded humble before his lord. The lesson for us is clear. When we are given power, the higher act is to forgive and so to stay grateful. We are very reminded by your lecture prof to that many of the prophets lived in poverty that near nearness to Allah was never measured by wealth or station. uh and in the lives of Syodana Yub Sayudyana Ununus we have how even the smallest thing turning away was met with sincere thba teaching us to be ever watchful and humble about our own shortcomings before Allah. Then there is Syduna Ibrahim Alaiisam who passed every test ready to sacrifice his beloved son showing us that every love we hold must remain smaller than our love for Allah and the beautiful submission of say is Alisam who surrendered willingly and through it all in the life of our beloved prophet Muhammad sallallahu alaihi wasallam we find the complete example to turn to Allah in dua to seek his help and to place our trust in name and every condition every prophet and every chapter of their lives is a lesson left for us. Thank you professor for opening this lesson to us so beautifully. Uh with that let us know move uh move to our question answer session and I can see the questions are coming. Uh let's see any of the question please uh from uh any of the question if anybody wanted to ask from either on the zoom or if anybody is uh on the YouTube channel they can ask even the question. Okay, before any of the question anybody could ask, I would like to ask a question pro from you. Uh from all the prophetic examples you have shared today, uh which lesson do you feel speaks most urgently to the philosophically struggles of our own our own new generation? How would you uh tell this amongst all these examples which is the most important?
I think the story of >> your mic is off maybe >> especially controlling your temptation because we have been tempted today by social media but by all kind of evil films you know produced in Hollywood in Bollywood for different people different prophets are more exemplary For young people maybe is the best story. But someone with anger problem for example or someone who is living under oppression under dictators is maybe Alisam.
Therefore I'm trying to go through each prophet in the holy Quran because you know not everyone has same problem.
Imagine someone is terminally ill in our next sessions. I would talk about everybody's some people are suffering cancer today some other terminal sicknesses you know and uh of course Allah Almighty you know made good examples for us in the lives of the prophets. So there is no escape from the guidance of whatever emotion we experience there is an example in everyone should choose you know if you have a rich man for example having man's power then you can look how he didn't abuse his power he was using everything for the sake of Allah almighty so every prophet is very important. Of course, as I said in the beginning of my talk, prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam is the best example.
So, but as I said, other prophets are known for certain things. Inshallah, you know, we choose our own choice depending on different situations.
Thank you.
>> Thank you. Thank you very much, Prof. Okay. Anybody from uh the audience those who wanted to ask any of the question please you are most welcome.
>> Uh yes I'm seeing the YouTube prop so as uh uh the zoom both both chats I'm watching.
Yes. Any question from the audience please?
>> I think people are getting their prepared for >> I know there are participants of there are about 24 participants uh those who are watching us live. Okay no question anyhow as we come to the end of our time uh I want to offer the deepest gratitude to professor Dr. Suland not only for his knowledge but for the care with which he shared it. We have been reminded today that the healing of the soul is not a modern discovery. It is a prophetic uh inheritance. A warm thank you to Isticum for hosting this series to our uh technical team behind the scene and to everyone of you who joined us in the morning. This is uh this was the session two of three. We warmly invite you to return to our final session. The same spirit, the same pursuit of wisdom. Uh ladies and gentlemen, let's have the picture together first of all and then we will conclude conclude this session.
>> Okay.
>> Uh in multiculture societies there are always challenges of tolerance of others. What are their limits in handling this? This is a good question because every prophet was challenged by you know non-believers.
Can we tolerate for example LGBTQ for example can we tolerate people cheating in business? Actually when we look at the prophet's lives they never gave any concessions.
They never gave up the truth against the power. They always defended the right thing, the right devotion, the Thanks.
Oh, you can.
>> Yes, prof. Yes, I'm just waiting. Maybe somebody else is writing. Uh, one more uh question had came. Uh, the the key word is obedience to command to of Allah. The problem with our community is we are ignorant and far away from understanding the Quran. What's your view? Actually in psychology departments they are teaching the Quran Quranic understanding of psychology. This is very important.
If you are in law school you must learn about the Quran. If you're in business school again you must learn how Islam is organizing trade.
Unfortunately nowadays you don't know all fields. You don't have to know everything. But if you are choosing a job you should learn what the holy Quran and the prophet say about it. As I said if I am a businessman I should know the you know injunctions conjunction about the commandment about the zakat which things I can buy which things I cannot sell. For example, what is it about? If I'm a psychologist, Thank you very much professor. Uh let's have a group photo here. I think sister uh you can help us in taking of the picture please.
>> How can you eat?
>> Uh yes the sister will do the part.
She's very technically very groomed.
By the way, I congratulate your from now inah tomorrow is after tomorrow is 8 accept your worship with Kurbanis and bring peace and health to all Muslim nations to all Malaysia or beloved respective countries brotherhood by sharing and caring for the poor through our companies as well.
>> Okay, sister Nasrin uh you have taken the picture.
Okay, thank you very much. Yes. Ready in 3 2 1. Yes.
Okay. Thank you. Thank you very much all of you those who came and those who have given their time on the behalf of IST student society and ISTM I wish you a very blessed day and I wish you in advance. So I conclude this session with these words. Alhamdulillah.
Okay.
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