Why Mormon Girls MUST Be Hot!

Added: 2026-05-12

[00:00:00]More of you girls need to start acting your weight. You heard that correctly.

[00:00:04]Act your weight. Because if you are 160 lbs, I don't want to see any attitude. I want you to be giving all that attitude to the treadmill. I eat too much too often. When I get nervous, I eat.

[00:00:15]And when I'm depressed, I eat. And I just eat anytime.

[00:00:18]>> Well, I don't like myself fat. Um I I really, in fact, I could say I hate myself. And I have I feel really self-conscious around other people. I feel like everyone's watching me and I feel like um you know a fat person just isn't lovable.

[00:00:34]>> I don't date very much.

[00:00:37]I date a few times but most of the guys are just friends.

[00:00:40]So >> my sister came up to see me and uh she's lost a lot of weight and she's just you know wherever we went together everybody was always she's your sister. Wow. I don't see how you can be sisters. She don't even look at all a lie. And here she is 95 lb, you know.

[00:01:01]>> Mhm. So, what were they telling you, Claudia?

[00:01:03]>> When I went to Yeah. Your big sister is a fat slob.

[00:01:20]I'm Jenny Gage and this is life take two. I came to social media 6 and a half years ago to share my story living as a stay at home mom, homemaker, now they call it proud wife inside the Mormon church. My very first video was really almost a cry for help. I don't even know why I did it. I had just met with my therapist who had asked why I was a 40 a 5-year-old woman at the time who didn't have a college education, who had never had a job, had no way to take care of myself post divorce. And for some reason, I just decided to send a cry for help out to the entire world by doing this little 60-second video about why the details behind that circumstance.

[00:02:04]how my Mormon state president made me be unemployed as a 22-year-old girl, which led to homelessness, food stamps, violent abuse, and a pretty [ __ ] up life. Okay, so I was 22 years old, recently married when I went in to have my Temple recommend interview with our state president, and he asked me, "What do you like to do all day?" Well, I told him, "I hike. I love bunny rabbits and ice cream and world peace and I work our windshield business about 50 to 60 hours a week and I'm thinking about going back to college. And he was like, "So then he told me that the family proclamation said that if I didn't quit my job and stay home with my baby that I would go to hell and totally [ __ ] up my kid, too." And he challenged us. He said, "I want you to fast and pray about this brother and sister Green and next week I'd like you to phase Sister Green out of the business." And so I quit my job, stayed with an abusive man for 24 years because I was unemployed and unemployable and now I earn minimum.

[00:03:01]>> I remember making that video and just thinking if just like a couple young girls hear this then they might change their minds about getting married and giving up their careers and all the stuff that I did and that's all I was doing it for. Like if I can just help a couple people and most of my time here on social media has been helping women and really trying to shine a light on some of the traps that we fall into as women. And then Donald Trump got elected and the minute he came into office, my whole platform has really drastically changed because we're all fighting now the giant cult that's in charge of America. I'm usually sitting in my studio talking about news and politics and I've really gotten away from just sharing my story and I miss that. So, I'm going to bring back a couple videos where I just share not because my story is unique, but honestly, in fact, because it's not unique, because so many women are living the same life right now that I used to live because so many young women are going to fall into that same trap. And it's a collective story not just of the Mormons and evangelicals and you know Jehovah's Witness Amish Menanite women so many other ultra-conservative women inside of MAGA and that whole entire pipeline that leads to the alt-right and the life that the alt-right has in store for women as we all can read about in the Heritage Foundation's project 2025 project 2026 etc. I also share my same experience with so many women of past generations.

[00:04:26]My mom, my grandmothers, my aunts of an older generation. So my story is not unique in the challenges that I faced and the things that both harmed me and benefited me. It's my story is not unique and I'm not special. I'm just a woman in America and so many of us have been through the same things. Today I just want to share a little bit about the incredible pressure to look a certain way inside a culture where women are valued mostly for how they attract men and having babies and they don't have value outside of that very very very tiny box that they're pushed into as wife and mom. The quest to be thin wasn't just a hobby. It wasn't just a passive interest of mine. My entire life and all of eternity depended on it.

[00:05:20]Inside the Mormon church, we had a belief that man and woman couldn't go to heaven without one another to be in the highest degree of the celestial kingdom, which was everybody's goal to become like God. You had to be married with the new and everlasting covenant. I'll put some links in my description so that you can read up a little bit more about this. So I was literally taught from the time I was a very young child. I can remember being about 5 years old when they started to teach this in primary about eternal marriage, eternal family.

[00:05:50]We would sing little primary songs that taught us about families being together forever through Heavenly Father's plan.

[00:05:58]I know that a lot of other Christian religions teach till death do its part and then when you die, you're just going to be single. You're worshiping God all by yourself as an independent, autonomous child of God. In Mormonism, the twain shall become one flesh, not just for this earth life, but for time and all eternity. That's what Mormonism is all about. I've been digging through my vast collection of diaries that I kept from age 8 so that I can publish some of those on my Substack. And as I read through some of my older diaries, it's really sad to see a 9, 11year-old, 13year-old girl obsessed with my looks.

[00:06:36]And that was always tied directly into finding an eternal companion. It was my mission in life. It was everything that I lived for because I wanted to return to Heavenly Father again. I wanted to live in heaven. I wanted to have my family with me forever. And the step to getting there was attracting that man.

[00:06:56]There was an older single woman in my ward for a while growing up. And to me, she was the ultimate horror story. She didn't take care of her hair that much.

[00:07:08]She didn't wear makeup. She was on the higher end of the scale. And it was just heartbreaking to me as a young woman looking at her and thinking she doesn't have an eternal companion. She's not raising children. She's not fulfilling the only reason that she's here, which is to be a wife and a mom. And I knew that she wasn't going to be able to go to heaven because she didn't have that husband. And it's funny how much of my life I spent thinking about this woman and being so heartbroken for her. But also on the flip side of that, thinking, I never want to let that happen to myself. And the reason that she's not married is that she just wasn't able to attract a husband. And I know that a lot of teenage girls go through phases where we are bothered by our bodies and our faces and our hair and all those things and that quest to keep up with all the supermodels and all the pretty people that we see on camera. But for me, I had that and on top of that that insane pressure that I was going to need to make sure that somebody would marry me.

[00:08:11]So, I can remember even as a, you know, a very young late elementary school girl making decisions about, I'm not going to eat that ice cream that my grandma just gave me or the coconut cream pie that she has in the kitchen because I need to keep myself attractive. It didn't help that the Mormon church released all kinds of videos and young women's lessons and other propaganda to support this narrative that women should be thin. Go watch this full video. This is really uh an eyeopener. Uh I believe this was from my mom's generation, like the late 1960s, early 1970s. It's called Fat Fighters. And they interview all of these girls at BYU who are just not stick skinny. And the the fat shaming, the just generalized body shaming in this video, that was my life >> about being sexy and stuff like that. It just scares me and I don't want to have to go through that.

[00:09:12]>> You don't want to be sexy.

[00:09:13]>> I just I I want to be kind of neuter.

[00:09:17]>> One of the major problems is the lack of dating activity. Most of the girls are not dating and most of them don't want to because of their poor self-image and discouraging experiences.

[00:09:28]Deliberate efforts are made to develop social skills through special assignments with a goal of improved rapport with the opposite sex.

[00:09:37]>> Everybody's going to have a reason to be unhappy to some extent, but you're taking these reasons and using them as a basis of staying up there.

[00:09:46]>> I'm not worried that I won't get married cuz I know I will.

[00:09:49]>> Odd, >> you know, and so that's not my hangup.

[00:09:52]>> But Don, your past history and Karen's past history indicates that you're both in ruts. That's true.

[00:09:58]>> And if you don't get out of those ruts, you're going to be in them. Just like Murray is saying, when you're married, as well as your >> That's what I'm trying to do. I'm trying to get out of my rut right now.

[00:10:07]>> But part of the rut is not facing up to reality and not being honest.

[00:10:12]>> That's right. But I'm trying to get out of it.

[00:10:14]>> But you get very angry when somebody tries to help get you out, don't you?

[00:10:18]>> Yeah.

[00:10:19]>> And so I really want to.

[00:10:22]>> I I really am trying. I think you are because you keep coming in spite of it being painful.

[00:10:27]>> Yeah, I I come every week.

[00:10:33]>> The girls are all on their way. Some have lost more weight than others.

[00:10:38]>> This came from the church. That was just always part of my life. And it really ramped up when I went away to college. I started at what's now called BYU Idaho.

[00:10:47]Back in the day, it was called Rick's College in 1992 when I was a 17-year-old girl. And yes, I was at college. So you think I was there to get an education as Charlie Kirk talked about going to get your MS degree. That's what the Mormon church has always taught. Why do they even put young women in college? Why do they give them scholarships and things like that so that there can be girls there for the return missionaries to go marry? So I really wasn't focused on my education or what I'd ever do with it.

[00:11:13]And that was reinforced by counselors, by my college bishop, and the entire community. I was there to find my husband. And the flip side of that was the pressure that I had to make sure that I was attractive enough to bait the right husband to want to marry me. So, in the months leading up to me going away to school, I wasn't concerned at all about talking to my counselor about what credits I could take that would transfer off to the next college or what would be the most marketable job skills or anything like that at all. Not at all. Not in the least. My focus was how I looked. I started going to tanning salons all the time. That was like such a 1990s thing to do. I made sure that I saw hair stylists right before I left. I had a job so that I could save money for like the best clothes, cute little dresses and high heels, of course, all very modest. And had my teeth bleached for the very first time. Like I went to my dentist back in the day and had him bleach my teeth. And my whole entire emphasis was how I looked. And I had been trained throughout Young Women's to focus on all the wrong things, to focus on what was on the outside and how I was presenting to everybody else around me.

[00:12:30]And unfortunately, what they don't tell you is that that pressure to attract your partner doesn't stop when you get married. I guess I always kind of thought that, you know, once I get married and have kids, then I don't have to be I think it was 98 pounds when I started college. I'm small. I'm only 5' 3. I was naturally skinny anyway, but I was a string bean when I started college. But then you get married and have babies and the pressure is on to keep that man interested in you because you don't have job. You don't have anything else of value to your husband that you're bringing to the table.

[00:13:00]You're dependent. So, in a lot of ways, Mormon husbands do see you as a liability. Like, you got to bring it if you're going to have that sugar daddy taking care of you and the kids. I posted an article here this week on my Substack about my Mormon life and I included this photo. This was me after having four children. In fact, this photo is just about eight years ago right now. I was like 43 years old at the time and I've had multiple comments about just how gaunt I look and I look like I'm anorexic and just really the thinness of this this woman. I look very much like Ruby Frankie. I also get that a lot. I remember when I was in my late 30s and we had moved to South Carolina.

[00:13:41]So, for the first time in my life, I had a non- Mormon doctor, not because I chose to have a doctor who wasn't Mormon, but because there just weren't any Mormon doctors available in the town. So, I had this doctor that was non- Mormon. And one of the first questions that he asked me when I went in for a physical was if I had an eating disorder because I was about 10 lbs under the average.

[00:14:03]And I asked him if he ate at McDonald's.

[00:14:06]This was my response. And he's like, "Yeah, I prefer Burger King, but yes, I do." And I said, "Well, you have an eating disorder. I consider that very disordered eating. My eating is very orderly." And the funny thing is that at the time I would have never thought that I had any type of eating disorder.

[00:14:26]Wouldn't have considered that in the least. If somebody had diagnosed me with that, I would have thought that they were absolutely crazy. And I didn't necessarily have something that would fall under diagnostic criteria for an eating disorder. What I had was at that point like 40 years inside the Mormon church where literally every bite of food that went into my mouth, I considered what the results were going to be. And if I had a day that I woke up and my size double0ero jeans after four babies didn't fit me just so when I was 102 lbs as a 40-year-old woman then I would make sure that I just did a water fast for a couple days and I was vegetarian for years that morphed into veganism and finally eventually for the last 3 years before my divorce I would be a raw vegan living almost exclusively on sprouted nuts and what did I even hate. I hate air and good vibes. One funny thing from the my my wife era in general, not necessarily raw veganism. I don't know, maybe this isn't funny, maybe this is just sad, but how long it took me to grocery shop? Because if I was picking up like a new box of organic crackers that I'd never purchased before, I would have to look at every single ingredient, count all the calories, do the math on that, how much fat is in this, what type of fat is it, and is this even worth me putting in my mouth? I had this little saying that I said all the time. Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels. And I would say that in my head all the time, anytime it was like after dinner, but I didn't eat after dinner before bedtime. And I do a little intermittent fasting here and there, too. When that became a thing, um I would say that to myself when I was hungry, when my hands were shaking, when I was out at the park with the kids and I felt like I couldn't even push the stroller over to the slides, I'd be craving just give me a granola bar. A granola bar would feel so good right now. And I would say to myself, nothing tastes as good as skinny feels. I think it's sad too to see today on social media all of the stick skinny Mormon girls that are still out there.

[00:16:24]Ballerina Farm has the body of a 14-year-old and she has nine babies and she just had a baby and she's just popped right back into that little teeny skinny figure. Taylor Frankie Paul who has just left the Mormon church so she's not officially Mormon anymore. She is so tiny. I know she doesn't come across as so little on camera. She's very thin, but in real life, she's just tiny, tiny.

[00:16:49]She's so sticky. all the girls on secret lives of Mormon wives and most of the LDS influencers that you see, they have all of the trademark Mormon stuff, the Utah curls, the bleached teeth, the eyelashes, the Botox, the lip flip, the breast implants, and everybody has mommy makeovers after they've had their babies because they can't have that little bit of a pooch because again, their only value is keeping that husband attracted.

[00:17:15]Because if he's not in love with her and he just decides this marriage is over, then what? She's going to end up like I did at age 44, homeless, years of poverty after that. And everything everything that was supporting her is gone if that husband doesn't stick around. And for those of you who comment about, you know, Jenny, you look so much healthier and happier now. Totally happier. So much so. And as far as the weight gain, like I've gained 75% of my former weight since I left the Mormon church simply because I didn't have that pressure to be thin and keep my husband interested in me. I remember when me and my beautiful partner Kevin were first dating. Like it was one of the first weekends that he spent at my house. And at like midnight, we were just watching movies in bed and whatever. And he asked if I had any ice cream in my fridge. And my first reaction was at at midnight like I don't need those type of calories. But I was just in this like enjoy life type of mode. So we went out to the kitchen and grabbed big bowls and did banana splits with, you know, caramel sauce and fudge all over the top and sat in bed at midnight eating ice cream. And it's funny that that was probably the first time in my life that I'd ever done that ever. And I was like 45 plus years old.

[00:18:36]And since not having that pressure of the Mormon culture, that quest to keep my husband happy, the pressure from Jake directly who watched me like a hawk to make sure that I stayed exactly the way that he wanted me to stay, and just the stuff in my head, the programming from childhood and everything that I had never let go of. As soon as all of that evaporated, I decided to just eat. And it's funny, it's seven years now since I left the church. And Kevin and I have been together for almost seven years.

[00:19:07]And to this day, if I sit down to just like eat a sandwich at lunch, just whatever sandwich I want. And yes, I still eat a very healthy diet. But if I just sit down and eat until I'm full, I will still talk about it feels so good to be full because my whole entire life I was always hungry. And I was I was always hungry. I was hungry because I had to look hot to get to heaven. And in so many ways, it feels like that should be illegal. Like, how do religious organizations get away with telling children that they have to attract a mate? Like, here you are in church and you're falling in love with Jesus and you're buying into the whole eternal life thing and you want to go to the celestial kingdom. Well, let me tell you how you do that. You have to be really pretty so that you can get a husband. How is that legal? It seems like child abuse to me. And it was experienced as child abuse to me. That's what it felt like. It was soul crushing.

[00:20:06]My nickname for years was skinny Jenny.

[00:20:09]And I guess now I would just change that to Happy Jenny.

[00:20:15]And a lot of the reason why I'm in that space now is leaving the doctrines. I don't think that I would ever have gotten over that. I would still be 102 lbs today if I hadn't left the Mormon church. And of course, the other aspect of that is having value outside of how I look. That's not all I bring to the table with my partner. Now, there's so much more. So, I guess I'd like to bear my testimony that decentering men, desentering the man gods and the man scriptures and everything that they teach you is the secret to happiness.

[00:20:48]10 out of 10 would recommend. I'd like to hear from you. Did you grow up in a community where your looks were valued above everything else and the only thing anybody wanted out of you was a pretty face and a toned body, glossy hair and bright smile? If so, tell me about it in the comments. And if you have transitioned beyond that, tell me what led to your life take two. Thanks for watching everyone. Mwah.