People On The Sidelines Talk The MOST CRAP.

Added: 2026-06-02

[00:00:00]It's never the people that are making the most effort that end up tearing other people down. You don't see rich people or wealthy people or successful people necessarily coming after people that have less than them. And I know that there's a stereotype that wealthy people are stuck up or something, but it's always the people that have the least to lose, that have been scorned by society the most, that are in their own perception less than you unconsciously.

[00:00:26]and whether they know it or not, the ones who do the most damage. And it should be an indicator to everybody that if you're being torn down and you're being bullied, you have something that they don't have that they want. And I mean, as someone that's dealt with bullying throughout my whole life, I mean, it always seems that people just do what they are able to get away with, honestly.

[00:00:52]And it's a shame because it does damage people, but what why do they why would they care about damaging someone else when they have absolutely nothing to lose? They'll project all their negativity onto you day in and day out and tell you snap. And then what normally happens is that you look like the crazy one for retaliating.

[00:01:13]So it seems that we live in this materialistic world and there is more consumption than creation. And when you become a creator, other people are going to try to tear you down as the underdog creator until you succeed. And then they're going to pretend that they were on your side all along. The obsession with possession and status becomes a prison simply to impress people. And for what?

[00:01:37]Because when you have stuff, people are going to try to take it away. And from a young age, we're conditioned by society to behave in certain ways, to do certain things, to value certain things. We'd all be different people if we were born in different places or a different time.

[00:01:53]And this conditioning is a form of imprisonment.

[00:01:56]How can you not question the validity of accepted norms when they are completely random?

[00:02:08]And how can you accept the validity of someone who's bullying you when it seems that they're only doing it because you have more? But there are systems in place that keep people down that are being attacked and bullied. And from my experience, it's always the people on the sidelines that have the most to say.

[00:02:28]And it's because they are insecure, miserable, and jealous of other people.

[00:02:32]Psychology shows us that cruelty comes from insecurity and fear. But the thing about it is is that everyone will always say that they're just jealous, right? But then what do you do about it? Because there's been people that have been maimed from the jealousy of other people. There's people that have been murdered out of jealousy.

[00:02:51]Never let a person that gets their personality from reality TV hurt your feelings.

[00:02:59]I just wish we could all be respectful of each other because everybody is going through a hard time. You know, nobody is out here thriving these days. And miserable people project what's going on in their lives onto innocent people because they feel like they have nothing to lose. But as someone that was going through [ __ ] while I was being bullied, I was getting it from all sides. And I felt like there was nothing that I could do to escape.

[00:03:24]And people who can't use their strength will always exploit another person's weakness. People that feel weak will always look for weaknesses in others and exploit that and project it onto them to feel better. And it seems that it's always the chopped one in the group that attacks the one that's more beautiful. or it's the least athletic one that has the most to say or it's the one that thinks the [ __ ] talker is always the least skilled person in the room. It seems empty vessels make the loudest noise and still waters run deep.

[00:04:00]The people who know the people who are the loudest know the least. Meanwhile, you have other people that you know sit quietly and are more methodical and those are the people that end up being targeted.

[00:04:17]And I don't think we should tolerate disrespect.

[00:04:21]The phenomenon where individuals with low ability and limited knowledge and greatly overcompensate um or overestimate their own competence. I think there's a word for it. I think it's known as the Dunning Krueger effect or something, but I'm not sure on that.

[00:04:40]I might be wrong. Um, it seems like the more stupid you are, the more you overestimate yourself, and I feel like I know several people who after spending years being ugly had a glow up and then they became the attractive, good-looking one, but still um kept their shitty mindset or their mentality of that they were unattractive. And it can really affect you because it's like when people lose weight, they get treated very differently or when you gain weight, you get treated very differently. And unless you have a certain level of charisma, um people are pretty superficial when it comes to your appearance.

[00:05:34]And uh teenage girls are probably the worst perpetrators of this. like they'll make fun of you and refuse to sit sit next to you because you're ugly or you're chopped or you're weird or whatever it is and it's all about projection. They basically attack you and turn everyone against you and it's super weird. And I remember in school I just wasn't really interested in what people thought of me.

[00:05:58]But it got to the point where like rumors were being spread that were affecting my mental health. kind of like how it is now on YouTube where it's like I ignored the bullies for months and they kind of just got away with it honestly because they never really it never really got physical and um people would would say that I'm a nobody like like what does that even mean?

[00:06:24]Everybody's somebody, you know, but people that say stuff have never or people that some people have never encountered truly evil people. And I believe that we're all manifesting our reality. And if you're a chronic victim or you're being chronically bullied, you're either in a very toxic, difficult environment, like you could be in a prison, for example, where everyone's out to get you. Or you could be projecting some sort of energy that is saying, "Look, I'm an easy target." And I don't even know what it was that made me such a target for abuse. I still don't know what it is that makes me a target for being attacked. And it's something that I still wonder about.

[00:07:11]You know, it's it's the anonymous people online and the people on the sidelines, like I said before, that have the most opinions. You see a lot of times people shit-talking athletes, professional athletes, like when they lose a game or something, and it's some fat [ __ ] on a couch or something like that. And it's just crazy that it's people with the least that think that they can just tear you down.

[00:07:40]It kind of means that they have really no they they are not putting themselves out there enough to fail, but they're the first ones to mention your failure.

[00:07:51]And there's a lot of people like this ever since co because they're like chronically online. And I feel like the internet has radicalized a lot of people to believe things that aren't really even indicative of real life. So few people are even in real life anymore. As someone that is chronically online, it's kind of crazy. But everyone, it's always the haters that tell you your worth. It's like if there if you're worthy of being hated, you're doing something right. Like everyone who's ever made it has has had haters.

[00:08:26]Now whether you like her or not, Taylor Swift, Lady Gaga, they've all they've all had stalkers, haters, and people trying to tear them down. But now they're extremely wealthy, whether you like it like like it or not.

[00:08:38]and jealousy and envy. Instead of fixing themselves, they mess with other people.

[00:08:45]And I kind of sometimes wonder if ambition is something that people are simply born with because from what I know, it seems that some people have the fire in them and some people want to snuff it out.

[00:08:58]Some people are just coded to be bitter.

[00:09:04]How many people in today's age have haven't had a 10-minute conversation with someone? You know, how many people in today's age haven't had a connection with someone recently?

[00:09:15]Success is simple. You either outwork your excuses or you lose.

[00:09:20]And if you're successful and attractive, you're not normally online because the world meets your needs. So, it seems that a lot of people turn to online to get their needs met like I do.

[00:09:34]And it's very easy to attack someone who um doesn't have a way to defend themselves or who is remote and you don't really know them in real life.

[00:09:49]And I remember seeing this video of a man that left a racist comment on someone's TikTok and she actually hunted him down and found him and got him fired for that comment, which is amazing and I think we should normalize that kind of thing.

[00:10:03]So most people don't have skin in the game when it comes to being creators or trying to do something awesome with their lives. They're just haters and Reminds me of like colleagues that will start rumors and leave you out of emails and stuff like that and they'll project their victimhood onto you when you finally win in a fight.

[00:10:35]Pictures profile can mean that they have I I remember thinking that I gave a [ __ ] about people's Facebook followers. There used to be this thing on MySpace called the top five or something where it's like you were like besties with someone in their top five and it's like I just remember thinking that this is so superficial.

[00:10:52]And I think a lot of these negative people just don't like it because we're authentic and they don't have the bravery to do that. Or someone along the way put them down to the point where they lost their authentic selves and they want to do the same thing to other people because they think it's wrong. Or they're just unconscious and they like the fix that they get from tearing people down.

[00:11:12]And I understand a level of gatekeeping and paying your dues, but at the same time, there are people that just are bullies.

[00:11:28]And I don't think we're being negative by acknowledging the harsh realities of the world. The psychological and ideological divide between us seems to be widening.

[00:11:39]pockets of tension are exploding all over the world and less and less people are able to survive. And I just think that if you manage to find a way to live, people are going to have nothing to lose. Like there's there's more and more people that have less and less to lose.

[00:11:53]I'll put it like that.

[00:11:57]And I feel like some people just aren't capable of hard work. Some people aren't capable of consistency. Some people are so in this belief system where they don't want to put in the work and they think that they're entitled to just having it right now that when they see something that you've earned, they think that they can just take it from you.

[00:12:20]I truly don't understand these types of superficial people, why people are so obsessed with appearances, why people have to tear other people down. And I've never understood the mentality of being a bully. I really haven't.

[00:12:36]I just >> I just believe that karma will come around. Like what goes around comes around. Like when you're going for it, eventually it'll catch up. And I keep waiting for something to happen to the people that bullied me back in the day.

[00:12:53]But it seems that for the most part, they end up getting away with it.

[00:13:03]But anyway guys, um, if you're new here, my name is Shelby.

[00:13:11]I exist and I make stuff. And the modern society is a scam.

[00:13:18]I feel like bragging about being the best student or being the best employee is like bragging about being the strongest slave on the plantation.

[00:13:33]And at this point, I'm certain that maybe even ads aren't even trying to sell us anything. They're just trying to piss us off about things that we can't have.

[00:13:45]It's just that I need more Monopoly money so I can buy more plastic or else I'm nothing.

[00:13:59]I feel like I don't I'm losing I'm losing my train of thought now, but you guys know how I do that.

[00:14:09]I feel like certain levels of work or hard work is kind of like a slave mentality.

[00:14:17]Like the people that would criticize me would be because I wasn't fitting into the slave system and then they would try to convince me that I would never succeed. And maybe they were right. But what is success as a slave?

[00:14:31]The ability to suffer indefinitely without complaining is seen as being manly or or just enduring pain is seen as being manly. I I thought that it used to be competence and power, but it seems that being a slave is now being elevated while being the master is denigrated.

[00:14:58]And it's always the other slaves in the system that want to drag you down. They see someone on their way out and they want to do the the crabs in the bucket routine.

[00:15:17]a lion hunting an animal for eight hours straight every day or an animal trying to escape a predator for eight hours a day.

[00:15:25]That seems like how most of us are.

[00:15:26]We're either being prayed on or we're being the predator.

[00:15:40]Honestly, I'd rather deal with a predator in the wild and deal with an immediate threat than the long prolonged stress of being packed in like sardines like these other people or with other people. I mean, the thing is that most people would call animal control as soon as anyone acted like the way most humans do.

[00:16:13]It seems that even the friends that I had in high school fell away. And it's not even a broken bond. It's just that most people move away and they get busy.

[00:16:22]And most friendships are extremely shallow.

[00:16:25]The new the new American dream is to leave. The new American dream is to use the system to escape the system, which is like you can't you can't leave the system by being a part of it.

[00:16:39]People always are like, I'm trying to save up enough money to leave my job.

[00:16:43]And I get it, you know, but how do you leave the system through through using it?

[00:16:53]I feel like public schools are literal prisons for children. And the only time many people will experience physical violence is normally in school.

[00:17:06]Boxes and cages as kids so our parents can be free to wage slave and they just keep us in these little boxes. We're just boxed in like literally mentally, physically. It's spiritual warfare to keep us numb and to keep us in learned helplessness. If you tie if you if you beat a lion or you tie an elephant to a string when it's young, it'll always think that it can't escape.

[00:17:30]Sometimes even if you open a caged for a caged wolf, they won't escape because they don't know how to survive on their own. A caged bird will think that flying is an illness because its own wings have been clipped.

[00:17:50]Regular exposure to high cortisol levels changes your molecular biology so that you become stressed more easily for longer periods and it becomes a chronic condition.

[00:17:58]In other words, stress is like being addicted to cigarettes, but you become habitualized to this buzz of feeling of needing to feel like crap.

[00:18:11]And I get that we have bills, not to mention car maintenance, gas prices, loneliness.

[00:18:18]It's crazy how part of part of it is like nothing is really worse than school. I think about my life and I have to remember that at least I'm not in high school anymore because school was absolutely [ __ ] miserable in every single way. if you possessed an IQ that was even slightly higher than average or slightly lower than average, just enough to grant you um some self-awareness or maybe just enough to be bullied, then you were seen as weird and quiet. And I just don't understand why I need to be constantly talking all the time. It's like I was accused of being the quiet one, of being shy when I just really didn't relate to the people around me. And so they thought that I was an easy lowhanging fruit to just bully and pick on.

[00:19:00]I dropped out of the workforce and I'm happier now than I've been. And I feel like I'm making about the same amount of money as I was working part-time by going full-time on my art. And I know that took me 20 years personally to do because I've been doing art since I was, you know, 12. I'm almost 33 now.

[00:19:25]Um, I tried living on cheap pasta and all it did was [ __ ] me up. You know, I have a hard time saving money on food.

[00:19:42]That's my big thing.

[00:19:49]If a life lived in high court is all, if we're all stressed out all the time, it's not worth living. You know, in tribal societies, if someone was being problematic, you went through, your cousins, your aunties, your uncles, and relatives to have some kind of consensus. And if you were right, they just got exiled or killed. And I feel like sometimes in toxic environments, it's the innocent people that get killed. In modern societies, you have to go through lawyers and bureaucratic processes.

[00:20:17]And modern civilized life produces a lot of good and it definitely makes some things easier, but you go through way too many steps to make your way down to get justice.

[00:20:35]And normally there is no justice if you can't afford it. And the whole soul question didn't really matter back when you were just fighting for survival.

[00:20:42]Life wasn't consistent. And so the soul was getting up every morning and working for the group and and communing with your friends and maintaining what you had.

[00:20:52]And you figured yourself out through proving yourself against a lion or a threat or through the the trial and the the um the gauntlet of giving birth or something like that.

[00:21:13]And I really don't know what a utopian society would look like.

[00:21:19]But ever since I totally gave up on the idea of ever owning a home or attaining career success, my life has improved immensely. I have almost like a shut-in lifestyle working only enough to cover my basic expenses.

[00:21:33]And I know that I have a privilege of like living with my parents, but I'm going to leverage every single privilege that I have.

[00:21:42]It allows me time to spend with reading, creating art, enjoying life. I'll never be browbe into downloading LinkedIn or working my ass to death. My lifestyle will probably be pretty lame and I'll forego a lot of material possessions.

[00:21:59]But it really is insane how many people live their lives as if they have another chance. You'll only be this age once.

[00:22:07]And I kept waiting for someone to come and save me. I kept waiting for someone to take me by the hand and tell me what the [ __ ] I was supposed to do with my life. But the idea of giving up that up to slave away is just so that you know Caner Fitzgerald quarterly profits can go up is is just patently insane. Like for what? So I can purchase an empty signifier of status to impress the people that bullied me in high school. So that I can live slightly in a slightly bigger box. so that I can attend more overpriced events and associate with different people that make more money.

[00:22:44]Like, I honestly would rather hurl myself into a wood chipper than go through or participate in the system in any capacity ever again.

[00:22:53]School was such a nightmare because with undiagnosed ADHD, I just couldn't stand the prison. I wasn't able to do it. I was forced on to IEPs and counseling and school is just absolute hell for years on end.

[00:23:09]Seven crappy hours of our lives that we'll never get back for 12 years. Just think of like where we could be in our lives if we had actually been building skills that we were good at. I'm not saying we don't need general knowledge, but it's just so inefficient the way school is.

[00:23:25]And the socializing aspect, I never really got anything out of socializing at school.

[00:23:29]other than, you know, just feeling isolated.

[00:23:41]And I I feel like servers, for example, food service workers or construction workers, they they they slave away. They work like donkeys and they make barely anything. Or even if you do slave away and make a lot of money, what's the point if you're never home to use it?

[00:24:04]I ended up applying myself in school and I objectively succeeded at school by societal standards and it was for nothing.

[00:24:14]And when I remember my early 20s, I'm no longer ashamed now of how things have turned out. But I am ashamed that I was ashamed of those things. I'm ashamed that I just gave a [ __ ] too much.

[00:24:38]If we don't need to be stressed, we shouldn't want to be stressed.

[00:24:52]I actually feel like bills are these abstract economic forces that keep us within this mentality of this reality. One of the biggest of these is starvation, which is very much, you know, a real thing. And it does threaten our survival to not have our basic needs met. But anything outside of meeting your basic needs is completely unnecessary.

[00:25:43]Everything feels like it's fake. Like the social aspect of school and bullying, the feeling that we're trapped in this desk chair chamber, like teachers are not truly caring for students. they are just part of the bureaucracy. People expecting you to find a job and work constantly and then being bullied and pressured by people like shame is a social construct.

[00:26:10]Pressure is a social construct. Like people threaten your survival if you don't comply with the system. But then what's the point of living?

[00:26:23]I also noticed that the dollar as it becomes devalued, the economy generally genuinely crumbles. We've slowly stopped even trying to convince people to work in any way material bene that's beneficial materially. We're not even told to work anymore to buy a house because it's becoming less and less true. The system is just relying more and more on fear and shame. Now we've we've actually eliminated the reward for complying with the system.

[00:26:56]Literally, we've just translated we've just transitioned from like comfortable indentured servitude in a suburb to actually blatant slavery.

[00:27:07]You have to give up your life and dignity for bare necessities.

[00:27:17]People brag about slave maxing in this economy.

[00:27:30]We're fed slop. We We consume slop.

[00:27:38]I feel like I'm stressed all the time, even though I have no real stressors.

[00:27:45]I remember being energetic as a kid and slowly but surely I was boxed in.

[00:27:51]The teachers despised me. I literally spent all my free time doing homework thinking that one day, one day as an adult by now I would be free to make my own choices to not be treated like [ __ ] I thought that if I worked hard enough in school I wouldn't be treated like [ __ ] anymore and that I would be accepted finally.

[00:28:13]They thought that I was [ __ ] They thought that I was weird. And one day we go on this trip outside where all of a sudden I feel relaxed and they're like, "For some reason, you're not so squirly when you're outside or something along those lines."

[00:28:33]And I'm like, "Yeah, because I'm not being imprisoned in a in a jail."

[00:28:39]There's a reason schools look like jails.

[00:28:46]spiritual warfare on a grand scale.

[00:28:48]Money is energy, right? But trading time for money is crazy. I don't I don't trade my time for money anymore. I don't get paid by the hour anymore.

[00:28:59]And I don't know how I manifested this.

[00:29:01]And I'm not saying that I'm rich, but like I would rather be a neat and get away with it than ever trying to pursue a life in this system where people just gang up on you if you overperform, fire you if you underperform. There seems to be no balance of good enough or the right amount.

[00:29:29]When I was a kid in school, I would procrastinate and not turn in assignments or I would do the assignments and then forget them and I would be shamed and guilt tripped into oblivion while saying that I wouldn't have a future like like anyone could have predicted what would have happened.

[00:29:46]It was basically a more emotional torture going through school and I would just get around to doing these assignments out of guilt. But I would just try to be avoiding pain all the time.

[00:29:59]Now, as an adult, I resent what I've been programmed into. A mediocre person, a mediocre version of my core essence.

[00:30:09]Guilt tripped into slaving away this life so that the powerful can become more powerful. Working towards a goal I have no personal stake in because the alternative is ostracization, starvation, imprisonment. And we have to recognize the ways in which we've been set up for failure. elevate our situation, elevate each other, and raise the next generation better than we were raised. But the system is against us. I feel like you'd be a horrible parent to bring a child into this.

[00:30:39]They keep the men complacent with porn addiction and gaming addiction. They give them fulfillment through fake things that aren't real. And if it wasn't for these things, men would have revolted already with how bad things have gotten. The copes keep up with how [ __ ] up things are. And with AI, the copes are only going to get keep getting even stronger. They keep us sedated.

[00:31:12]I was stuck for years chasing the next big thing. And it wasn't until I realized that at this point it's not about the nine to to five grind or waiting for luck. It's about the structure and discipline that works quietly in the background while you actually live your life.

[00:31:32]It's about realizing that I was cog in a machine that I couldn't possibly understand and shifting my focus to building systems of my own life.

[00:31:41]building building building an audience of like-minded people. And we can utilize this technology to create instead of consume.

[00:31:54]I used to be stressed all the time.

[00:31:58]I used to have nightmares about school and just stay up at night pumped full of stress hormones, cortisol, adrenaline, thinking about a letter, a number on a top of a piece of paper.

[00:32:12]And it's all about fakery. The craziest part is that when you work like a dog or you're unemployed, you may not even have that much of a different life.

[00:32:22]You you certainly are not any freer by having a job.

[00:32:29]I see people come in to situations all the time that are, you know, working their lives away. And I feel like sometimes homeless people may be even happier or freer.

[00:32:46]We have to parlay what we have into an ability to survive.

[00:32:56]These mass extinction events are going to keep happening. These mass casualty events are going to keep happening.

[00:33:02]They also force you by law to go to school. Truency is against the law.

[00:33:13]You need high levels of power in order to actually remove yourself from the system. Unfortunately, in most cases, when you remove yourself from the system without resources, they treat you like absolute dogs.

[00:33:32]The high of feeling good can also be a reprieve from feeling bad, such as, you know, alcohol and opiates. So, you can be addicted to being constantly cortisol filled and stress filled and adrenaline filled and enjoy the tiny window of reprieve where you are basically numbed by your own stress chemicals like when you're you're in the fun part of a video game or you're just going to bed or after a stressful day or you you're eating McDonald's. You know, modern life has indeed created a world of pain with small offramps that feel good. And the delineation of feeling good and bad is at the heart of consumerism and materialism. It's like most of us just have this deep sense of feeling not okay and our entire lives just revolve around avoiding the meaninglessness of life for a moment. Numbing ourselves out but at the same time being poor and having nothing spikes cortisol as well.

[00:34:26]So at least with a job you can afford copes.

[00:34:30]Your thoughts can physically affect you.

[00:34:32]And I think too many people hesitate to actively use positive affirmations because they feel like they'd be feeding into some sort of delusion or that it's corny and woowoo. But the goal of affirmations should be pointing out to yourself what you experience or to, you know, prime yourself for gratitude for an experience rather than actively trying to deny reality like I'm thankful for stuff that I don't have or something or trying to manifest something you don't already have. It's like I think you have to take inventory of what you already have.

[00:35:02]You can make them as straightforward or esoteric as you want, but it's important that you don't force yourself to believe things that aren't real about yourself. It's like you're not lying about yourself. I feel like taking things for granted is the thief of joy, too. Like having running water in this economy is a blessing. Having the lights come on when you switch the flip or flip the switch is is a blessing.

[00:35:32]Public school is I don't even know if private school would be any different, but I hated school since I was very young.

[00:35:47]They tried to chemically labbotomize me because I was too strong. So, they sedated me and I was still on those sedatives today.

[00:35:58]I guess we're going to be bankruptcy maxing soon.

[00:36:02]And they say that homeschooling will ruin your social skills.

[00:36:06]So, I don't even know what the alternative is.

[00:36:13]Schools are just basically daycarees that keep people from actually living their own lives. It just keeps the money flowing through the economy. Like think about how few people were needed in the European villages to be fully self-sufficient. Everything today is built around the system. It's like almost everything we do ends up serving it. And if you try to step outside of it, you'll be punished and end up alone.

[00:36:35]And the only thing we really have that's even somewhat outside the system is like freelancing. I guess making our own money, starting our own thing, art, but even art has been taken away by AI.

[00:36:56]And I know a lot of people that are cooked from being homeschooled because it's like you don't even know how to function in the system at all if you were homeschooled.

[00:37:19]I mean, I remember school life was where my my response to like the prison type hierarchy in the school was to just not engage with it at all, never be part of the artificial ecosystem, just do my own thing because I learned early that trying to play the game was boring and miserable. And to make matters worse, these midwits would take that social system from school and then take it into the workplace. And it's like you never escape high school.

[00:37:49]Wherever a thought goes, a chemical goes with it.

[00:37:53]But I feel like I don't have always control over my thoughts.

[00:38:01]A lot of people end up dropping out.

[00:38:06]I just remember going in and just wanting to punch walls and punch everyone in the face every day. The only way to escape was to just dissociate for me.

[00:38:25]Jobs are literally an adult daycare indentured servitude.

[00:38:34]double my cortisol and pass it to the next person because I feel like you can be addicted to stress like I was saying before.

[00:38:47]Do we take the red pill?

[00:38:49]Do we stay in a hyper vigilant state?

[00:38:55]We're cortisol maxing at this point.

[00:38:58]We're living on sheer adrenaline and it's suppressing our immune system and stressing us out all the time. Like lot life sucks so much. I sometimes think that there's no way that this isn't a simulation. There's no way that this is not diabolically designed to snuff out your soul.

[00:39:16]making things like simultaneously not make sense, but laughing at the natural response of this because it's like we're cooked.

[00:39:28]It's just like things have gotten so much gradually worse.

[00:39:32]It's actually just all brainwashing.

[00:39:48]And living in constant stress gives gave me an autoimmune disease. It's not a lie. Like the more like stress is a chemical reaction to our environment but also to our physiology. And once you've passed a certain threshold of chronic stress, like I said before, it's easier to get cancer again after you've had cancer once, it's easier to get stressed out again once you've been stressed out chronically.

[00:40:15]It's almost like pressing on a burn victim's skin versus pressing on someone's skin that is not burned. It's like we got to we got to rebel by stopping to eat processed foods. Like I know that that's not always easy, but I'm dumping all my time and energy into my art at this point.

[00:40:46]And if you guys want to support my art, check out my Etsy.

[00:40:50]Um, I'm going to be doing more commissions. So, if you guys ever want an art commission of any kind, check me out.

[00:41:02]A shitty diet can cause intense levels of cortisol spiking or insulin spikes too, which causes cortisol spikes.

[00:41:13]We got to we got to start drinking more water and change our diets. But then again, how do we afford it?

[00:41:20]I still have occasional nightmares about school. And I actually had a decent GPA relative to a lot of people, but it was just so stressful.

[00:41:37]Maybe I should just go homeless.

[00:41:40]I don't I don't think I'll ever be homeless, thankfully.

[00:41:44]But I've been in a mindset where I literally physically believe that I would end up on the streets if I didn't do well in school, which was never true.

[00:41:55]I'm trying to read into philosophy like Nietze and Narissism and Kant and Kierugard and stuff like that.

[00:42:03]They predicted modern life very well.

[00:42:13]The government literally shows us what we want to consume. Targeted ads are crazy because we're all on different sides of the internet now. There's no consistent media anymore.

[00:42:27]There's no there's no shared reality anymore. We're so divided by social media because everyone's on a different side of the internet.

[00:42:36]And school was like going to a torture chamber. Unpaid labor.

[00:42:46]I feel like God was just a concept that we had because we didn't know how to prove everything otherwise.

[00:42:52]Especially in the face of rough conditions, we couldn't really explain famine. We couldn't really explain explain that drought. We didn't have systems around it to survive it.

[00:43:02]And it gave you something to believe in.

[00:43:05]But I have to wonder how people in war zones still believe in these things. How anyone can because it seems like religion kind of just helps to assist the patriarchal and elites system.

[00:43:28]But self-awareness, situational awareness, we make money off of, they make money off of our anxiety.

[00:43:44]We're placed into a world that automatically breeds super predators who lord over us and then we are expected to be thankful for it.

[00:43:58]And school was hell. Like I said before, I wanted to be creative and I still want to be creative. And then we don't have any energy at the end of the day to do the creative things that we want to do.

[00:44:16]Life as a concept is inherently stressful. It's like a fight for survival every day. Like regardless of civilization, if your civilization isn't fighting to be competitive, then you'll lose and be subjugated by the opposing tribe. That being said, society is still [ __ ] up. It's a [ __ ] up torture machine. It's always been. Life is just a fight for survival. And what are we trying to stay alive for? Why do we have this inherent fear of non-existence?

[00:44:51]I just don't know the answer to that.

[00:45:01]They say that even strawberries are poisoned now with too much glyphosate.

[00:45:08]The easy answer is to stop consuming, start creating and saving. Money is energy.

[00:45:20]I do believe that the best path to a good long life is to stay off the antiscychotics, stay away from the the noise and create more than you consume.

[00:45:41]They want you to be afraid of the walls of your own mind. And it's your responsibility to push against these walls.

[00:45:46]They want to punish you and force you into submission.

[00:45:54]And these are the people on the sidelines.

[00:45:59]Like I was saying earlier, the people on the sidelines have the most to say.

[00:46:03]These are the ones that project onto us.

[00:46:09]and what people do is more of a reflection of them than you. And I think the older that I get, the more I understand that because it's like when you're when you're a kid, immaturely, you think that the world revolves around you and that everything is personal.

[00:46:26]The devil's goal is to convince you that you what you know to be true is false and what you know to be false is true.

[00:46:37]And it's often times the people that are closest to you, like your family, your parents, the people from your hometown, they see you in this box and they want to keep you there. And it's really strange.

[00:46:54]And I feel like lying is your best bet. You don't want anyone to know what your true dreams are.

[00:47:05]You only want other like-minded people to know your dreams.

[00:47:11]And people that supposedly have their lives together on the surface, like have a spouse, children, home, job are all the ones that bother others and try to judge people and call Jenzie lazy for being cryb babies. Meanwhile, Jenz may not have all of that, but we're not busy bashing others lives and we don't hurt a fly. It's like as a 30 almost 33-year-old woman, I say thank you to Gen Z because I was are already living kind of a a Gen Z lifestyle and I've never been happier. And we're finally living at times like these where we can just flow and be ourselves as long as we dissociate from the system because everything's [ __ ] anyway.

[00:47:51]And I never really trust reviews on movies and music because other people's opinions are trash. It's like you have to like a certain thing to be accepted. You have to and who gets to dictate that anyway? It's so empowering to have your own opinion that was truly formed by you and not by the fear of being different from other people. I remember when I was in high school, I used to check in to see if something was cool. I was still embarrassed that I still like Pokemon and Neopets.

[00:48:20]And I'm getting to the point where I almost can't stand content, where there is no pauses, where there's jump cuts, or it's high energy, where sometimes a creator won't even let me hear their whole sentence without being spliced up. Like the more splicing there is, the harder it is for me to connect with a creator or a person talking. And I haven't seen a lot of people making genuine content out here until recently.

[00:48:56]That's why I don't really edit my videos.

[00:49:10]And smart and attractive people usually are not the wealthiest ones. Sometimes, a lot of times, it's the most repulsive, unattractive, and ignorant people with the most confidence and delusion that end up making it because they believe that they can't.

[00:49:28]Dream big. Dream logically. Don't don't don't dream logically. Like, dream big, not logically, but also have a very clear idea of how the world works.

[00:49:42]And I I hesitate to say that I should have been more careful about who I shared my my dreams and desires with because even though my friends and family are wonderful people and they support me, I never fully trust anyone when it comes to my goals and aspirations. And there have been far too many instances where my dreams have been shot down, laid bare for all to see, looking utterly pathetic and unachievable as they shrivel up and wilt away. Like I wanted zero negativity from anyone during this YouTube channel building. So I didn't tell anyone that I was making this channel until I was already monetized until it was so big that I couldn't be ignored.

[00:50:32]And my mantra is never take advice from someone you wouldn't want to change lives with. This has helped me a lot.

[00:50:39]Unfortunately, I took the advice of others seriously for a long time and it set me back from my dreams. But I'm hopping back on the wagon.

[00:50:49]When I worked at a fast food place, there was this woman that I worked with that was a supervisor. She'd always come in pissed off.

[00:51:00]He'd rant about everything like her BD beating her and [ __ ] I don't even know.

[00:51:05]And it was just clear she was projecting on to me and trying to tear me down because she was stuck there and she didn't have options.

[00:51:16]It's hard to explain, but I feel like when people see you having less cortisol or stress than them, they project theirs onto you, and it just transfers energy.

[00:51:31]I've learned to be supportive of other people's lofty goals, not a jackass, and discourage them, not tell them that it's unrealistic.

[00:51:39]And I'm purposely boring now just to deflect projection. I just tell people I don't care about anything. And it's not far from the truth, but it's not the entire truth either because it's the people that see where you're going. and they see see your accolades and they see the declarations you're making about success and they want to tear you down.

[00:52:13]It's like testing fate and and I hate being given attitude by customers or people or just being seen as a punching bag.

[00:52:46]I'm not okay with being shut down anymore. I just do what I want. And to this day, it would have been easier if I had a supportive environment. To this day, I wonder what it would have been like if I had mentors instead of bullies and detractors.

[00:53:04]And I've wanted to be an artist ever since I was 12. It's been 20 years, but I've never really made any progress on it. And I basically gave up on my dream for years because I felt like I had to already know how to paint by the time I was 25 years old. I had to already be professional by the time I was 25 years old.

[00:53:24]I haven't known what I don't know, and I just don't know how to piece all the things together in order to make it happen. But the thing about it was was putting myself out there and I just didn't know how to do it. And I just kept trying it though. And now I'm selling more of my art than I ever have.

[00:53:41]Failure hurts like hell.

[00:53:44]But understanding how life works is also important when it comes to lofty goals.

[00:53:47]It's okay to have lofty goals. It's okay to dream big. But you have to have a path to get there. You have to have training. You have to know the fundamentals of your craft.

[00:53:56]And There's a story of a New York Times bestselling author that was told as a 20-year-old by a cool guy in her writing class that she couldn't write and she believed him and stopped writing for 30 years. Now her novel is a New York Times bestseller.

[00:54:19]Her only regret was listening to this jerk and not pursuing her gift.

[00:54:26]The annoyance of having to constantly smile ear to ear is so real.

[00:54:31]Realistically, I'm just not smiling all the time. My older older men that you work for or customers especially make a fuss over it.

[00:54:56]And I'm never going to stop creating art. I want to keep going with it.

[00:55:05]So your hometown is a cult.

[00:55:10]People are the crabs in the bucket.

[00:55:18]And that's the summary of today's video is that young people.

[00:55:26]If I had known these things earlier instead of learning the hard way, I would have been in much better shape.

[00:55:30]So, I guess it takes as long as it takes to learn these lessons. But if you're being hated on and torn down, it's because you have something special. And you can actually reverse engineer what your what your gifts are based on what people are picking on you for. It's the very things that they're tearing you down for that you should focus on.

[00:55:58]I I want to be unapologetically ambitious and goal oriented. And what I notice is that when I step into these goal oriented mindsets, a lot of times I'm met with cynicism and nihilism. and the algorithm rewards it and the cycle of self doomer perpetuate self-perpetuating doomer mindset continues and it's like this doomer side of the internet has become its own thing it's like if you say that you're trying to evolve out of that mindset people don't want you part of their doomer club anymore and being someone who wants a positive future despite everything that I've said that we're cooked and everything like that I still want a positive future It's just hard not to feel outcasted sometimes. And I can't believe I Oh my gosh, it's been like an hour since I've started talking on this video. But don't let people project on you. That's the end of today's story. Don't let their anxiety, failures, and insecurities anywhere near your goals. This is like common in all stages of life, but especially when you're young, as we're seen as naive compared to others. And I actually thought that people who are older knew better.

[00:57:09]But I listened to the wrong people for years. And now I'm finally listening to myself. And I'm not letting people that are on the sidelines dictate what I want to do. How could someone that's not an artist and who's never pursued it and who and who There's so many artists that do make money. There's so many people on YouTube that do make money. I never thought I'd be monetized on YouTube, being able to pay certain bills with my my YouTube money.

[00:57:37]And I just wanted to say finally, thank you guys for watching.

[00:57:47]I can't say enough how much I truly appreciate you guys.

[00:57:52]And I've almost been on this channel a year now. And we've hit over 20,000 subscribers in a year. And I just wanted to say thank you so much for the support, for your understanding, for for your like-mindedness.

[00:58:05]And again, my name is Shelby. I exist and I make stuff. And I will see you in the next