Cracking Down on LA Hospice Fraud

Added: 2026-05-20

[00:00:00]Today we're undercover to investigate LA's rampant hospice fraud.

[00:00:04]>> Mother, >> he's on the wall, man.

[00:00:10]>> This charming gentleman speaks for one of 89 registered hospices in a single office building in Los Angeles. With 89 hospices, you'd expect this place to be buzzing. That's not what we found, though. Sir, our grandfather is here.

[00:00:24]>> Our grandfather, he likes it here. two days. Not one hospice was open to accept our beloved grandfather, Ron. And maybe that's why, according to the LA Times, federal investigators are all over this building. And since, according to Dr. Oz, the brunt of the perpetrators are Armenian.

[00:00:42]>> In this fourb block area, there are 42 hospices. It's run by the Russian Armenian mafia.

[00:00:48]>> We'll have Leo playing an Armenian in order to gain their trust. And since it's not every day we get our hands on a certified old man, we'll be taking him all over Los Angeles to screw around.

[00:01:01]But first, let's get this investigation underway.

[00:01:06]>> Hello.

[00:01:07]>> Yes.

[00:01:08]>> Hi. I'm at the, you know, reliable home and uh I have my grandpa, you know, this old man Rondon here and uh we just wanted to bring him in and talk, you know, some business and see what we can do. Put him in, you know.

[00:01:21]>> No, thank you very much, man. I'm not interesting.

[00:01:23]>> But he's like we're trying to enroll him, you know.

[00:01:26]>> I say I'm not interesting, man.

[00:01:28]>> Yeah, but what do you mean? This is hospice. You know, >> it's your job to take this old off our heads.

[00:01:34]>> Who's hospice, man?

[00:01:35]>> What do you mean? This is >> we talk like it's your number is on the wall here and it's a call for like when you have old piece of [ __ ] you need to get rid of somewhere.

[00:01:45]>> Says that on the door.

[00:01:46]>> I don't know what you're talking about, man.

[00:01:48]>> Say something. Hi, I'm I'm [laughter] >> That was the shadyiest phone call ever.

[00:01:57]>> We're blurring details here so we don't get sued or decapitated by the Armenian mafia. But two things. One, this place has the comical Y spelling of reliable in its business name, reminiscent of Nick Shirley's learing center. And two, that guy's number was listed as the official 24-hour on call phone number on the door. A lot of these hospice businesses had numbers on the door promising 24-hour on call customer service. So, we rang them up.

[00:02:24]>> I can do a >> I'm sorry. The person you are trying to reach has a voicemail box that has not been set up yet.

[00:02:30]>> That's weird.

[00:02:32]>> Okay.

[00:02:33]>> Your call has been forwarded to voicemail.

[00:02:36]>> Okay, >> dude. It's all hospicees.

[00:02:38]>> Welcome to Verizon Wireless. The number you dial is no longer in service.

[00:02:43]>> It already was.

[00:02:44]>> Your call has been forwarded to voicemail. Nobody there in person.

[00:02:48]Nobody answering the phones. Very interesting. Hi. Excuse me. We're trying to drop this guy off at a hospice care facility. Can you help us with that or are you only lip injections?

[00:02:58]>> No, my mom doesn't.

[00:02:59]>> Oh, yeah.

[00:03:00]>> He was saying that he wanted to be you to be his nurse or whatever, but that's crazy.

[00:03:05]>> I'm studying to become one.

[00:03:06]>> Oh, that's nice.

[00:03:07]>> Couple more years, Ron. [laughter] >> Hold on, buddy.

[00:03:10]>> I don't think I have two more years.

[00:03:12]>> I have faith. Do you ever see any Armenians pulling up in blacked out Gwagons who, you know, maybe they would seem like they work three, four hours a week, that kind of thing going on?

[00:03:21]>> I'm here on weekend.

[00:03:23]>> Are we getting a call back?

[00:03:25]>> Hello.

[00:03:26]>> So, this is our original guy calling us back.

[00:03:29]>> I think you called the wrong number.

[00:03:31]>> Really? He You sure?

[00:03:33]>> Listen, man. We know how this works. We slide you a couple grand. You put a pillow over his face. You and I cash the insurance money.

[00:03:43]>> Yeah.

[00:03:44]>> All right, let's talk to some of the other tenants.

[00:03:47]>> This is one of the other 24-hour lines calling us back.

[00:03:52]>> Hello.

[00:03:53]>> Hello.

[00:03:54]>> Yeah, we have like old guy here for the hospice type [ __ ] >> I'm sorry.

[00:04:00]>> Sorry. We have like this olding guy here. Say hi.

[00:04:03]>> Hi. Hi.

[00:04:04]>> Yeah, he he is like perfect for the hospice. Uh [ __ ] you know. So, >> who is this?

[00:04:10]>> My name is Arouch.

[00:04:13]>> And where are you calling?

[00:04:14]>> I'm calling from What do you mean? Where am I calling?

[00:04:17]>> We're in Van. We're in Vanise.

[00:04:19]>> We're in Vanise. I have my my grandfather here. I >> I am Arouch's associate. I don't What?

[00:04:23]What is up with your suspicion? We have our grandfather and we're just trying to deposit him into a hospice facility.

[00:04:29]This is insane.

[00:04:30]>> They don't want to talk hospice, man.

[00:04:32]>> I am not welcome, I don't think.

[00:04:34]>> Oh, wait a second. Prime Care ask maybe they pay me.

[00:04:38]>> Hello. Hi.

[00:04:39]>> Hi.

[00:04:39]>> Oh, hi.

[00:04:40]>> Hospice here.

[00:04:42]>> No, we have not.

[00:04:43]>> We have Well, whatever you do, you care and we need somebody to care for our grandfather.

[00:04:48]>> You know, he >> Well, we know we don't want >> cuz we've given up caring for him. We can't do much more.

[00:04:53]>> He's spinning the ass, you know. He's like [ __ ] his pants today. Not working.

[00:04:57]>> Not today. Not working.

[00:04:57]>> Not working. They [clears throat] >> Well, nobody around here seems to be doing much working at all. Listen, this guy, his legs are dripping with feces.

[00:05:05]He's been drooling. He's been grabbing girls in the hallway. Is there anything we can do with this guy?

[00:05:10]>> I don't know.

[00:05:11]>> Yes, I am cleaning.

[00:05:12]>> What do you do? What's your business?

[00:05:14]>> What?

[00:05:15]>> She's She was cleaning. You need to take this call.

[00:05:18]>> Maybe she could clean me.

[00:05:20]>> Hey, look. Can we talk business now or what?

[00:05:23]>> For the second time, the original guy at Reliable Blank Blank rings us back.

[00:05:28]>> What a motherucker. Who give my number?

[00:05:30]You have it is on the wall, man.

[00:05:32]>> It's public.

[00:05:34]>> You, >> you know, that's really a rude way to speak to a possible client. All right.

[00:05:39]You call yourself a professional.

[00:05:41]>> We have, man, >> we find the old guy. He's perfect, bro.

[00:05:48]>> Did you just say something about a condom? I will not stand for sexual indecency.

[00:05:55]>> Your your number. So, sorry, man. May you be your number, dude. That was so that was right there.

[00:06:00]I mean, the guy, first of all, his name was on the caller ID and we just got threatened in English as well as Armenian. Ron, >> despite everything we said, you've got a lot of good years left in you and we love you. You're a healthy man.

[00:06:13]>> Ron is not ready to be deposited into hospice. But if I did have a relative who was ready, I would certainly not want her in hands. [ __ ] you, bro. How did you get my number?

[00:06:23]>> Yeah, that's right.

[00:06:25]>> He's due for some healing. Yes.

[00:06:27]>> Yeah, that's true. Hey, how's it going, man? Do you know what you're looking for?

[00:06:30]>> Yeah. Well, uh we're looking to get this guy healed before we drop him off at hospice.

[00:06:33]>> You won't you won't be able to find him here today, man. Nobody's here.

[00:06:36]>> Nobody's here, bro.

[00:06:37]>> Nobody's here today, >> sir. We just uh we called a gentleman and down the hall at one of the hospice services. He threatened us.

[00:06:43]>> I don't care.

[00:06:43]>> You don't care?

[00:06:44]>> I don't care. Look at that.

[00:06:45]>> Well, you don't have any sympathy for me. He We trying to drop off this old guy and [ __ ] >> Nobody here today.

[00:06:50]>> I have a fragile constitution. I don't like to be threatened over the telephone.

[00:06:53]>> If you're uncomfortable with the building, please leave. Well, we're going to go upstairs first cuz I mean our >> Nobody here today, >> sir. Our grandfather >> Nobody is here today.

[00:07:01]>> Our grandfather, he likes it here today.

[00:07:03]>> It's a hot It's hot. He's going to get heat stroke.

[00:07:06]>> No one is here today.

[00:07:08]>> Did I pay you to say this?

[00:07:09]>> No one is here.

[00:07:11]>> If I find out he's compromised, you know.

[00:07:13]>> No one is compromised today.

[00:07:15]>> You can leave if you would like.

[00:07:16]>> Now you sound like him when he gets on a broken record groove.

[00:07:19]>> Would you like to leave?

[00:07:20]>> No.

[00:07:20]>> You We'll invite you get police to invite you to leave.

[00:07:24]>> And then we'll help the police. will crack down on the operations because this place is corrupt as the day is long. And you know it, you know it >> here.

[00:07:34]>> Well, you know, we need to feel pride in living in California and giving 13% of our yearly income to these people. This is really a service we're doing. Would not be able to have his wife up at the lip injection clinic. He would not be able to have her rolling around town in a Benz shopping at Fendi if it weren't for the taxpayer. Yeah. So, thank us.

[00:07:54]more him than me, but thank us.

[00:07:56]>> Yes, >> we're about to get into some alltime funny bits with Ron. Trying to bully him into buying us a $100,000 truck, trying to get it mummified at an event center.

[00:08:07]But first, a quick word from the sponsor who made this video possible. If you guys create content like I do, or you want to create content and you want to turn it into real recurring income, you need to check out Fan View. It's a powerful creator monetization platform that lets you upload your content, build a page, and get paid directly through fans, support, and contributions. What's great about it, it's super beginnerfriendly, and works literally in any niche. And you don't need a big audience or any prior experience.

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[00:08:55]Also, and this is kind of neat, it's one of the leading platforms for AI creators or AI generated content. If that's the route you want to explore, if you want to be on that bleeding edge, if you've been thinking about starting to create content and you want to monetize it, this is the best way. If you're curious, just click the link in the description and check out the Fan View Creator Academy. It'll teach you everything you need in order to get started. We're here with Ronald, a man we know. He comes to almost every single one of our comedy shows.

[00:09:26]>> Ronald, your first comedy show was probably Harpo Marks and Buster Kaden.

[00:09:31][laughter] >> So, our taste in comedy, it's a little not his style.

[00:09:34]>> Yeah. Yeah.

[00:09:35]>> He preferred if one of us came out and juggled for the full 15 minutes every now and then.

[00:09:39]>> No top hats, none of that stuff. I'm sorry. No canes.

[00:09:42]>> Look at He's wearing Etnney. He's wearing skateboard shoes. Ron, can you pop shove it? Um, pop shove it. No, I can shove it and then pop my load. Yeah.

[00:09:52]Oh my god, Ron. Ron, that's good that you tell the audience. The audience was not sure if Rod was capable of popping it and then shoving his load. Or excuse me, shoving it and then popping his load.

[00:10:03]>> Yeah.

[00:10:04]>> And the idea gets across whichever way you say it, doesn't it?

[00:10:06]>> I like that, Rod.

[00:10:07]>> Yeah.

[00:10:08]>> Hey, check these out. These are all church security.

[00:10:13]>> Oh, wow.

[00:10:13]>> For the back door.

[00:10:14]>> Are you a church attending, man? on.

[00:10:17]>> Um, no.

[00:10:18]>> You know, that takes courage of conviction because a lot of people when they're getting near the time where they're going to shake hands with the grim reaper, >> they start making right with God. Is that your bed right there, Ron? That's nice.

[00:10:28]>> Yeah.

[00:10:29]>> Ron, I'm going to touch this at my own hazard.

[00:10:32]>> Oh, boy.

[00:10:35]>> There's your own hazard.

[00:10:36]>> And then I doubt this is a coincidence.

[00:10:40]Gooan.

[00:10:41]>> Oh, wow.

[00:10:42]>> Got the cocoa radiant Vaseline.

[00:10:44]>> Not spooch. And then the Gooan. And we mentioned the Marx Brothers and Buster Katon.

[00:10:50]>> There it is.

[00:10:50]>> Milton Burl is his guy.

[00:10:52]>> There it is. [snorts] >> A late Vivalian >> early television star.

[00:10:56]>> There it is.

[00:10:57]>> With an allegedly huge [ __ ] >> That is Thank you.

[00:10:59]>> Thank you, Ron. You know, taking anything edible from you after seeing your jerkoff station gives me some pause.

[00:11:06]>> Yeah, >> but my breath is a little stinky from post coffee. Ron, you ever come on to a girl in the grocery store? Some of them I I know too well cuz I've been shopping the same two stores.

[00:11:16]>> They know you by name and stuff.

[00:11:18]>> I eat their donuts as I'm walking through the place and they know I don't pay for them. And >> what? You just steal donuts?

[00:11:25]>> Well, I don't steal them. I just borrow them for a little bit and usually I return them to the outside world.

[00:11:33]>> Yeah, the outside world. Yeah, >> that's not okay.

[00:11:35]>> How are you better than the Armenian hospice these?

[00:11:37]>> For real.

[00:11:38]>> How are you better? Also, Ron, if you're in the produce section and you see a cutie, be like, "Hey, I bet you're over sexed. Your knees haven't met in years."

[00:11:47][laughter] >> You like that one, Ron?

[00:11:49]>> Damn, that's like some [ __ ] shaming, man.

[00:11:50]>> That's Milton Burl right here.

[00:11:52]>> That's some Milton Burl [ __ ] shaming right there.

[00:11:54]>> Yeah, Ron, be like, if they try to kick you out of the store for thieving andor hitting on women in the produce section, be like, "It's not my fault. Her whistle takes requests."

[00:12:04]>> Oh, we might have to do that, dude.

[00:12:07]Where am I anyway?

[00:12:09]>> We're at the car dealership, Ron.

[00:12:10]>> Come on. You're going to buy a [ __ ] car, bro. Come on.

[00:12:13]>> Oh, >> what do you think about these, Grandpa?

[00:12:17]>> Oh, that yellow one's nice.

[00:12:19]>> Wait, which I don't. He's a little What do you mean yellow one?

[00:12:23]>> Yellow.

[00:12:24]>> Oh, that's a pole. I see.

[00:12:28]>> Oh, yeah. It's a pole, Grandpa. They have that there for the banners. They're advertising. What's it going to cost us to walk off the lot today in one of these Rams here? Yeah, >> it depends of the MSRP of the one you pick, but anywhere between 88 to 90,000.

[00:12:42]>> 90,000.

[00:12:44]>> Yeah. Grandpa, you got your credit card, huh? You mind if we sit down and do some paperwork inside, sir?

[00:12:48]>> Yeah.

[00:12:49]>> Oh, let's do it. Yeah.

[00:12:50]>> Grandpa, the nice man's going to ask you some questions.

[00:12:52]>> Yeah.

[00:12:52]>> Where are we now?

[00:12:54]>> We're at the goddamn place to buy the car, bro. I'm sorry.

[00:12:59]>> Listen, grabs, we were outside. We came inside.

[00:13:01]>> I thought maybe it was a carnival or something. No, Grandpa. They don't have carnivals anymore. It's not 1926.

[00:13:08]Grandpa, you're going to need to pull out your credit card. The man's going to have you sign some paperwork. Okay.

[00:13:13]>> And you sign it, bro, and sign it well so it doesn't look fake, bro. He's really annoying sometime, bro.

[00:13:19]>> Have a seat. Grandpa. Grandpa. No. No.

[00:13:20]Grandpa, don't follow him. He said he's going to Come on, Grandpa. What are you doing?

[00:13:24]>> Sit down and shut the up, man. Sorry.

[00:13:26]Sorry, bro. Sorry.

[00:13:27]>> Sit down. Shut the [ __ ] up. Okay.

[00:13:29]>> People are looking at us, Gramps. So, Grandpa, he's going to slide you a contract and you're going to sign your name on it. John Hancock style. All right. He was one of your schoolyard friends, wasn't he?

[00:13:39]>> You go ahead.

[00:13:40]>> I think so.

[00:13:40]>> He signed it really big on the declaration.

[00:13:43]>> Signed it on with his dick.

[00:13:45]>> I didn't say anything about Dick, bro.

[00:13:47]I'm so I'm sorry. He's >> Come on, man. Don't talk about Dee.

[00:13:51]We're trying to make a deal.

[00:13:55]>> You work here?

[00:13:57]>> No, that's Rohan. He's our friend in the AV club. He knows how to use the camera.

[00:14:02]>> We got to do it. Okay. Because your bank said that we needed to film any sort of transaction because you're in a conservatorship and you're not in your right state of mind.

[00:14:10]>> Right.

[00:14:11]>> Daniel is going to help me.

[00:14:12]>> Okay. Awesome. Daniel, >> what brings you guys?

[00:14:15]>> So, Daniel, here's here's the deal. This is our grandpa. He's under a conservatorship. We got the cameras because this deal uh well, it needs to be captured in order for it to be considered legitimate by his estate.

[00:14:26]>> And uh we want to get one of those rams, man. We want to get you guys paid and we want to be on our way.

[00:14:31]>> Yeah. And I just want to give you a heads up if he says anything racial. He fought in the war. He's old school.

[00:14:37]>> His computer's not working. So, let me find a computer that does work. And I'll be right back to the gas.

[00:14:42]>> Is there a manager we can talk to, man?

[00:14:44]We're trying to expedite this thing.

[00:14:45]Daniel, I'm sorry to bust your balls here. It's like after 6 p.m. He can't even talk. You know, >> someone was stating that you want to do it out.

[00:14:52]>> Yeah, we want to do this thing now quick as possible. The only way I can actually accept a purchase on a vehicle would be cash, cash, use check, personal or business.

[00:15:00]>> You can't just swipe his card.

[00:15:01]>> He has like numerous cards.

[00:15:03]>> The most I can do on an actual credit card is $10,000.

[00:15:06]>> All right. Do you got something for under 10 grand on site?

[00:15:08]>> If you want to go down to my used car department down the street on the right hand side is my Maserati location. 5711 B.

[00:15:14]>> All right. We go there. He might as well been shoeing a bum off the property the way he just spoke to me.

[00:15:18]>> The only way you'd be able to do it, like I said, unless you go to a bank, give me a cashier check.

[00:15:22]>> The bank, he can't talk, bro. What do we do with the bank?

[00:15:24]>> He's going to go face down on the counter and he's going to drool. He's going to leave a big puddle of droo.

[00:15:28]>> You [ __ ] done this before, bro. We went to Chase like three times last week.

[00:15:32]>> I should say something. If the bank's not willing to do it, what makes you think a dealership's going to be doing >> Well, come on, bro. You guys are kill my car dealer, bro. Come on.

[00:15:39]>> You guys are the shadiest.

[00:15:40]>> This is a lemon. That thing's got sawdust in the accelerator. I mean, it's f Everything's a PG.

[00:15:45]>> My bro Harut, he runs like uh, you know, Robertson Honda, bro. He He would make the deal easy, bro. He's not in today, bro.

[00:15:51]>> All right. Well, I appreciate you guys for stopping by.

[00:15:53]>> Do you guys have an Armenian on site?

[00:15:55]>> Yeah. Do you have an Armenian, bro? Come on.

[00:15:56]>> No. I thank you for your time and thank you for >> He goes to bed at like 4:30 p.m.

[00:16:01]>> This is midnight for him, right? Who knows what he's he probably is seeing the light right now. He doesn't realize that's sunset. He thinks that's heaven.

[00:16:07]>> Grabs, come back. Come back from the light.

[00:16:10]>> He thinks he's going to the pearly gate.

[00:16:12]>> Come back to the Hey, don't go to the light, bro. Come on. Don't go to the light, bro. Come on.

[00:16:16]>> Thanks for Thanks for Thanks for your help. Consider the cheaper bat. Grandpa, you fought the Germans in a Jeep in the Second World War, didn't you?

[00:16:24]>> You bet.

[00:16:26]>> They're good vehicles. Yeah.

[00:16:29]>> He might say some unoured things to your Asian wife, though. You get >> Yeah. He's inappropriate sometimes.

[00:16:34]>> Don't hand her a ping pong ball. Okay.

[00:16:36]Don't you dare hand her a ping-pong ball.

[00:16:38]>> He always does that.

[00:16:40]>> Listen, she's a nice woman trying to She's not a sucky sucky girl from Saigon.

[00:16:43]>> I would give you that.

[00:16:45]>> She He's He keeps talking about the sucky sucky girls in Saigon. He keeps having flashbacks.

[00:16:51]>> I'm so sorry. He always does. [laughter] >> Good job, Ron.

[00:16:56]>> This might be a good place for your sendoff party.

[00:16:58]>> Hello. He was asking if he can have, you know, his like, you know, funeral. The wake.

[00:17:05]>> Funeral.

[00:17:06]>> Yeah. You know, like we put he he's going to get smoked. We put him there.

[00:17:09]Everyone can see the flower. Your money.

[00:17:12]We pay We pay good money.

[00:17:13]>> We pay good money. Once he's dead, we pay good money.

[00:17:16]>> Big time. Can we look at the room?

[00:17:18]>> Yeah.

[00:17:19]>> Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:17:20]>> We just have these on him. Our uh we got to make sure he trips and falls a lot and we have to have it on camera so we can sue the city.

[00:17:26]>> Yeah. Because we make like 40 grand less doing that [ __ ] So because he fall >> How do you feel about the room, Grimes?

[00:17:31]>> I won't be able to open my eyes and look around at the time. So this is good energy though. This is good energy for your funeral.

[00:17:37]>> But this looks good. Like you know your family, you got to think about your your you know your ex-wife is going to be right there probably with her new husband and she >> on number four. And then our niece Jenny with the big tits will be on three. Is that okay with you? You probably want her closer to the casket. We'll put her over there on >> put one, you know, probably with the big teeth.

[00:17:53]>> Maybe two.

[00:17:54]>> Maybe two. Maybe two. Yeah. Yeah. Of course. Huh?

[00:17:56]>> No. Two. The big tip.

[00:17:57]>> Yeah. You should see. But they're like they're like E, man. It's like crazy.

[00:18:01]>> It was a problem for a while of Thanksgiving cuz she was only 12 when she started to develop. And Uncle Ron, >> he's like a crazy bastard.

[00:18:07]>> Hey Jenny, why don't you come over here and sit on my lap?

[00:18:10]>> I'll tell you the story of Pinocchio.

[00:18:12]>> Yeah. And then, you know, the family got involved and they make a case and [ __ ] What do you think about like a big like spray like a mural behind him?

[00:18:20]>> Oh, I love that.

[00:18:21]>> Yeah, >> I love that. We get that picture of you after your swimming championship in 1938.

[00:18:27]>> Pretty. You look good. And your bulge.

[00:18:28]We We can put a little more on the bulge in the picture.

[00:18:32]>> We can do that in post, John. Give you a little something here.

[00:18:35]>> Yeah, we can give you something.

[00:18:35]>> Oh, I already have something there.

[00:18:38]>> He always talk about his dick. You know, he like >> he's always talking about his dick. He is.

[00:18:43]>> Sir, do you guys have any sort of inbalming service? Because we're thinking about mummifying this.

[00:18:48]>> Well, I still don't know exactly what you what you guys trying to do. And then how many people? What's what's the time?

[00:18:55]>> I mean, if we can you go in through his nose, can we get his brain out? And then can we get all of his vital organs taken out of his body? We just want to preserve this bastard.

[00:19:04]We want to have him around for generations to come. So we he could come to family outings.

[00:19:09]>> Do like event >> just the event part. Okay. So we we have to go somewhere else for that [ __ ] But I think I know a guy, bro. I I know a guy we can >> You guys You guys can't mummify this.

[00:19:18]>> You don't do that [ __ ] here.

[00:19:20]>> Oh [ __ ] >> Damn, dude.

[00:19:27]My espanol. No bueno. Papa Elo lo pantalones.

[00:19:34]>> Why are you speaking in Spanish?

[00:19:37]>> We're at a car wash. But this see this is our grants right here. Yeah, >> man.

[00:19:41]>> He [ __ ] dispense, man.

[00:19:43]>> No, I pooped. Didn't that come across in my Spanish?

[00:19:46]>> That was pretty good. But, uh, >> loses.

[00:19:49]>> What? What are we doing?

[00:19:51]>> Well, we need to run this guy through the wash.

[00:19:52]>> Oh, I know, but we >> He's durable, bro. You can put him in.

[00:19:56]>> Now, I'm going to give you a $20 bill.

[00:19:57]We're going to get him to drop his trousers and take a walk through the car wash. That's what's going to happen.

[00:20:02]>> Easy, bro. Easy.

[00:20:04]>> How you doing, my man?

[00:20:05]>> How are you?

[00:20:06]>> Good, my friend. Uh, you know, we got this old uh this old is she these pants?

[00:20:10]>> Not very much.

[00:20:12]>> You always say that three rolls of Charmin later. I'm still wiping.

[00:20:16]>> Yeah.

[00:20:16]>> What about Can we strap him on the car?

[00:20:18]The top of the car, you know?

[00:20:19]>> You know, one of those maidens on a ship.

[00:20:21]>> Yeah. You put him on the car, bro.

[00:20:23]>> He's going to be face down, too. So, you're not going to have to look at his dingling.

[00:20:26]>> Yeah.

[00:20:26]>> I I don't want you to look at dingling on the You don't get paid for that.

[00:20:29]>> And you couldn't help but looking at it.

[00:20:32]Can we give you a few buck to clean his, you know, to to wipe for us? Because, you know, we've did it like three times today, [music] but I'll give you like $200 if you want to clean him up.

[00:20:41]>> No, >> we'll handle valet while you're back there cleaning his ass.

[00:20:44]>> I'm sorry, sir.

[00:20:45]>> Yeah, it's it's not that that hard, bro.

[00:20:47]If you have a hose, you can just hose him down, bro. You know, >> and we can lay him out starfish style face down in the middle of the parking lot.

[00:20:54]>> Just [ __ ] >> And depending on the PSI of that hose, you can stand 10, 15t away. Sorry.

[00:20:59]>> What PSI do you have on your hose? Do you have a good hose?

[00:21:03]>> Hey, excuse me, man. Our gramps just [ __ ] his pants. He's been eating canned turkey all morning. Can we strap him to the hood of your car? Or can you make another pass through the wash?

[00:21:13]>> We'll pay for the car wash.

[00:21:15]>> And we'll a little something extra for you.

[00:21:16]>> Yeah, >> it's easy, bro. He does it like we've done it before.

[00:21:20]>> I know.

[00:21:21]>> Wait, you don't want a shitcovered elderly man on the hood of your car?

[00:21:23]What's wrong with you?

[00:21:24]>> No, thank you. Everything is wrong with me.

[00:21:27]>> No. No. It's easy to do, bro. It's like we >> You guys need to not do this.

[00:21:31]>> Sir, he's being a real jerk.

[00:21:33]>> I don't Listen, I know that. I know what you're doing. You guys are recording, trying to get content.

[00:21:37]>> No, no, we're recording because he does things that are against the law. He puts his hands on women in grocery stores.

[00:21:42]>> Yeah. You know, he's not good guy. He uh he grabbed kitties, [ __ ] You know, everything just crazy in store.

[00:21:48]>> And you might think he's exaggerating when he says [ __ ] but sir, >> that's his move.

[00:21:52]>> He gets in there.

[00:21:54]>> He gets in there.

[00:21:54]>> Claw type [ __ ] >> It's like a woodpecker in the side of an oak. No, look at how sweet he looks.

[00:22:00]>> You say that, but how about if he gives you an Australian kiss?

[00:22:07]>> Oh, what is that?

[00:22:08]>> Oh, wow. Well, it's kind of like a French kiss, you know, like this, you know.

[00:22:14]>> Uhhuh.

[00:22:15]>> But it's down under.

[00:22:18]>> Our grandp [ __ ] his pants. We're trying to go through the car wash. He's giving us a hard time.

[00:22:22]>> Listen to him, brother. He's trying to be funny.

[00:22:24]>> No, no, we're not trying to be funny.

[00:22:25]We're trying to be sanitary. We're trying to be clean.

[00:22:29]>> Trying to wash.

[00:22:29]>> YEAH, WE'RE TRYING TO WASH HIS ASS, MAN.

[00:22:31]>> He [ __ ] these pants.

[00:22:32]>> He trying to wash his ass.

[00:22:33]>> WE'RE HE'S TRYING TO WASH HIS ASS. LET HIM THROUGH, MAN.

[00:22:37]>> Come on. Hey. Hey, man. Appreciate you, man.

[00:22:40]>> Hey, you know what, man? This car washes on me.

[00:22:42]>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:22:42]>> This car washes on me.

[00:22:44]>> This was on me, dog. Hey, I appreciate you, man. Hey, thanks for looking out for your elders.

[00:22:48]>> Yeah, all the time, man.

[00:22:52]>> Hey, Ronnie, you should wake this guy up.

[00:22:53]>> Yeah. Yeah. Wake him up. Tell him to get his life together. Excuse me, sir. No sleeping on your basket.

[00:22:59]>> This >> uh No, you can't sleep on your basket.

[00:23:03]>> We just want to make sure people aren't dozing. It's a Saturday. You got to be a busy body like you ladies.

[00:23:08]>> Yeah.

[00:23:09]>> I wanted to make sure you weren't dead laying on that thing.

[00:23:13]>> Yeah, ladies. We were just trying to make sure he was with us still, you know.

[00:23:16]>> Okay, cool.

[00:23:17]>> People pass all the time, ladies. My grandpa wanted to say something. I I just wondered if you ever got a an Australian kiss.

[00:23:28]>> No.

[00:23:28]>> No.

[00:23:29]>> What's that? Grandpa, >> what is it?

[00:23:31]>> Yeah.

[00:23:32]>> Well, it's kind of like a French kiss, but it's down under.

[00:23:37]>> Ah, >> Ron.

[00:23:38]>> Grandpa.

[00:23:39]>> Gramps.

[00:23:40]>> We're sorry about that, ladies.

[00:23:42]>> She finally got it.

[00:23:44]>> That was great. Ron.

[00:23:45]>> Grandpa, you refuse to watch your diet.

[00:23:47]This is the kind of stuff that happens.

[00:23:50]>> Oh, how you doing, my man? We're trying.

[00:23:51]He has botulism, you know.

[00:23:53]>> He eats poncho via canned bean burritos from 1970s.

[00:23:56]>> You recording?

[00:23:57]>> Yeah. I mean, we got it. The guy's got botulism, bro. He's going to die on our hands. You think we want to take the fall? People are going to think we murdered him for the insurance money.

[00:24:05]>> Yeah, but if if I'm going to get charged for murdering him for the insurance money, which I've threatened to do several times. I'm going to be rolling camera, bro. That's just how I do it.

[00:24:12]Hey, what's up, man?

[00:24:13]>> Hey, what's going on, man?

[00:24:14]>> H Gramps has got bachulism. That's what's going on, man.

[00:24:16]>> Yeah.

[00:24:17]>> Oh, man. That sucks.

[00:24:18]>> I know it sucks, dude. What's going on with you, man? Okay.

[00:24:20]>> You all right?

[00:24:21]>> Um, yeah. I'm just getting discharged, but um, >> congrats.

[00:24:25]>> There's a a a question I need to ask.

[00:24:28]>> Hit it.

[00:24:28]>> When they did blood samples on me, I was at 400 alcohol level.

[00:24:34]>> That's impressive. I haven't been there since senior formal in college.

[00:24:37]>> Right.

[00:24:39]>> Grabs it been there since I think it was VE day, huh?

[00:24:42]>> Victory in Europe.

[00:24:43]>> Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So, so sir, you were shitfaced drunk. What's the problem? I don't really understand. How does 400 >> compared to 008?

[00:24:53]>> I think it's slightly under.

[00:24:55]>> I would say it's probably five times.

[00:24:59]>> Nah, Gramps is an old fddy duddy. I think you got two or three more beers left in you >> because one earlier time, you know, >> uh I blew or they >> You don't have to tell. You might have aged too if you blew.

[00:25:14]>> Got to be careful about that. There's a lot [laughter] there's a lot of those she mails where I'm in the streets of Burbank.

[00:25:19]>> Hey man, they're cheap. Come on.

[00:25:21]>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, what'd you blow, my man? I'm sorry to interrupt.

[00:25:24]>> Um, well, I didn't blow. They just took a blood sample earlier.

[00:25:28]>> He always denies he blows, too.

[00:25:29]>> I never blow, bro. You know, he's our boy.

[00:25:32]>> Hey, man. Hey, you beeped, man. I'm going to have to have you walk this again.

[00:25:36]>> That's a good one. But yeah, you can't record inside here. It's a hippo violation. So, I'm going to need you to step outside or >> It's just for our safety for grandpa.

[00:25:42]>> It's grandpa.

[00:25:43]>> I understand. But >> he whails us with a cane. You know how many times I've been cracked on the skull with that cane for doing nothing wrong? I'm sick of it.

[00:25:50]>> I just can't record inside.

[00:25:52]>> Yeah. I mean, we got it. This guy >> listen like he does crazy [ __ ] He put his cane up like a a homeless lady ass.

[00:25:58]>> Okay.

[00:25:58]>> He thinks it's still Korea, dog. He thinks every homeless person or even his grandsons are just another slope in the bush.

[00:26:05]>> And like the camera helps because >> Charlie in the trees, my man. That's what he thinks. Hey sir, do you guys have any alcohol on site for this man?

[00:26:12]He's coming down hard.

[00:26:14]You know, rubbing alcohol he say he drinks. So >> you guys have any Listerine?

[00:26:18]>> Yeah. Like Nyquil.

[00:26:20]>> Ron, you look great. You're >> Oh [ __ ] >> You were talking to grandpa about making some sort of romantic gesture.

[00:26:24]>> Thank you.

[00:26:25]>> Oh yeah.

[00:26:25]>> Hi. How are you?

[00:26:27]>> Good. How are you guys?

[00:26:28]>> Good. Good. We are hanging out with his grandpa, you know, and >> grandpa right here.

[00:26:32]>> He really wanted to like talk to one of the ladies and give the flowers.

[00:26:37]>> Yeah.

[00:26:38]>> Here. These are for you.

[00:26:40]>> A Ron. That's so nice.

[00:26:42]>> That's nice. That's very sweet, but I can't accept anything.

[00:26:46]>> All right, I tell you what. I'll give you a a Haitian kiss.

[00:26:50]>> No.

[00:26:51]>> Whoa. What? Grandpa. Wait. Wait. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Grandpa, what's a Haitian kiss?

[00:26:55]>> Kiss.

[00:26:56]>> It's um a kissing um >> I I don't know what's going on, but >> No.

[00:27:03]>> Yeah. There.

[00:27:04]>> He's been wanting to get this off his chest all day.

[00:27:06]>> I mean, he's been drinking to be quite frank with you, miss. I mean, he's been pounding wine.

[00:27:10]This is it's his it's his wife's anniversary or you know her death anniversary.

[00:27:15]>> She's been dead for 10 years.

[00:27:17]>> She's been dead for 10 years. So you could that's why he's extra socks.

[00:27:20]>> If you guys want to do the sock story somewhere else, that would be great.

[00:27:23]>> Well, you know, you should show a little bit more heart, miss. You do in fact work at a retirement home. I mean, his wife died >> in it was an industrial laundry accident. It was a nightmare. It just makes me feel uncomfortable that this gentleman is completely straight with the camera on me and I'm in >> Well, little do you know, he's actually not completely straight.

[00:27:42]>> He's gay as she over there.

[00:27:45]>> Grandpa likes that kind of humor. You know, Gallow's humor. He fought in the war.

[00:27:49]>> Yeah, >> the line was [ __ ] hole.

[00:27:52]>> I know, but I I just couldn't say it.

[00:27:54]>> You couldn't say it. It's hard. It's hard. I >> Hey, that's the thing is Rod at the end of the day, he's got oldw world manners.

[00:27:59]>> Yeah, he does. If you love Ron as much as we do, come meet him.

[00:28:02]>> He's in our comedy shows every Friday.