What If Tastebuds Were Human?

本站添加: 2026-05-25

[00:00:00]Deboning a gummy bear and talking taste buds are just some of what you'll find in these product Tik Toks that go off the rails.

[00:00:07]>> Hey, is that your poop knife?

[00:00:09]>> My poop knife?

[00:00:10]>> I needed to cut up the poop so it could flush down the toilet, but your bathroom didn't have one.

[00:00:14]>> We don't have a poop knife.

[00:00:16]>> God, do you use your hands?

[00:00:17]>> I didn't say I used >> Look, you do you. This is your house.

[00:00:21]But I am a civilized person, so if I could just borrow that.

[00:00:24]>> But no, you can't use this in the bathroom.

[00:00:27]>> Look, I know. I know it's not exactly a real poop knife, but I'll manage. So, >> all right, everybody. Every single toilet in this house is clogged, even the sinks. All because we couldn't find a poop knife.

[00:00:40]>> Right.

[00:00:41]>> Look, I don't need your autographed guy yeti poop knife. Just give me whatever you leave out for the guests. But we don't have one. Just use your hands.

[00:00:50]>> No, of course they have a poop knife.

[00:00:52]They leave it for me right here in the cabinet. That's our cheese knife. Did you really just come into someone else's house and ask to use their poop knife?

[00:01:00]>> Thank you.

[00:01:00]>> I just bring my own.

[00:01:01]>> That's a good idea, >> right? Toss it here.

[00:01:04]>> Oh no.

[00:01:04]>> What?

[00:01:05]>> He's He's about to eat something sour.

[00:01:07]>> How can you tell?

[00:01:08]>> He's setting up his camera right now. Of all the mouth I could be stuck in, it just had to be a food challenge YouTuber.

[00:01:14]>> I CAN'T KEEP DOING THIS, MAN. I'M STILL BURNED from the last Spicy episode.

[00:01:18]>> I have friends in the large intestine.

[00:01:20]Believe me, it can be worse. They lost everything. They say the tip of the tongue can only taste sweet. Maybe we should go over there.

[00:01:27]>> I've tried it. Just a myth, I'm afraid.

[00:01:30]Well, >> we have to do something. Hey, buds. Want to try some MB? MB?

[00:01:36]>> Ignore him. He's from the rough part of the mouth.

[00:01:38]>> Come on. There's no white blood cells around. It makes sour food magically sweet. What do we have to lose?

[00:01:46]>> All right.

[00:01:46]>> This is the world's most sour soda.

[00:01:49]>> Here it comes.

[00:01:52]>> Wo! It's not sour at all. IT'S SWEET. IT WORKED. YES. NOW, let's see what PEPPER SPRAY TASTES LIKE.

[00:02:01]>> THINGS CAN get a little messy around here, but we like to keep ourselves smelling fresh, and that's why we're fans of ScentBird. Scent Bird is a fragrant subscription service that lets you choose from over 600 designer and niche scents. They send you an 8mm bottle, which is about 120 sprays, which is enough to last you a full month. It's the perfect way to try high-end fragrances without dropping $200 on a bottle you might hate. Check out what they sent us this month. We have Dead Cool Extra Milk. It's got white musk and amber. It's cozy and subtle, just like me. Then we have Colt Gaia Mast with Italian Bergamont and coconut. And the reason I know that is because they have these helpful little fragrance notes.

[00:02:39]And I think this one is pretty interesting. Room 1015 electric wood.

[00:02:44]It's inspired by the scent of a guitar case. I used to play in a band, so I think this one's pretty cool. And the best part, the cases are sleek, magnetic, and totally portable. You can swap scents in and out depending on your vibe. Right now, you can get 55% off your first month when you use my code vat5 or scan the QR code on screen. You get to try the first fragrance from scent Bird for only $8.97, and your next month will only be $17.95. So, go to the link in the description, take their scent quiz to find your perfect match, and use the code VAT55 at checkout for that 55% DISCOUNT.

[00:03:17]>> OH MY GOD, WHAT happened to my hand?

[00:03:21]>> The operation was successful. His hand is completely made of magnets.

[00:03:25]>> Why would you do this?

[00:03:26]>> It was the only way to save you. And as much as I hate to admit it, the DBS needs you.

[00:03:31]>> The DBS?

[00:03:32]>> The Department of Big Secrets. Son, you're America's first bionic super spy.

[00:03:37]>> What? You called this bionic.

[00:03:39]>> With just 1 to two hours of prep time, your hand could be virtually anything, a lockpick, a knife, or a really cool ball.

[00:03:48]>> But what if I need fingers?

[00:03:49]>> That's what your other hand's for.

[00:03:51]>> I have another hand.

[00:03:52]>> Did you really think Uncle Sam would send you in unprepared? What is this, Vietnam?

[00:03:57]>> The Mark I has fingers made out of micromagnets. Perfect for extracting enemy secrets from inside Pringle cans.

[00:04:02]>> Does that happen frequently?

[00:04:04]>> Never. But we have to be prepared for anything. As we speak, America's enemies are engineering their own bionic super spies to rival you.

[00:04:11]>> Is that a bionic gun?

[00:04:13]>> Don't worry. Once we install these bionic nipples, you'll be protected from over 3% of all incoming fire.

[00:04:19]>> I don't think I can do this. You're wrong, Pete. You're better, you're stronger, and you're way more fun to fidget with. God, >> do you really think I have what it takes to be a spy?

[00:04:29]>> Of course I do. Cuz if you don't, you owe the US government about $6 million.

[00:04:34]So, >> Oh, yeah. Thought so. Ariel here is about to jump off the roof. We're going to see how many plushies it takes to stop her fall.

[00:04:41]>> I thought we were doing the neck drop challenge.

[00:04:44]>> We already AIed that. Check this out.

[00:04:46]It's mad realistic. That's crazy how realistic that is. We got 20 plushies on the ground. Will that be enough to prevent Ariel from getting serious injuries?

[00:04:56]>> No.

[00:04:57]>> All right, that's one no vote from Ariel and one yes vote from me. Let's find out who's right.

[00:05:02]>> They're they're plush toys. They're not designed to like catch you.

[00:05:06]>> Uh, science lesson. Soft things make gravity chill out. You should know that from your little egg drop video.

[00:05:12]>> That wasn't me.

[00:05:14]>> Oh yeah. So realistic, huh?

[00:05:17]>> I'm not jumping off the roof. No.

[00:05:20]>> Well, we won't know what happened to her, but we will know what happened to me. Soup. Soup.

[00:05:34]Next up, $1 versus $10,000 ambulance.

[00:05:38]Let's go.

[00:05:43]>> Oh, God. Are you milking your desk?

[00:05:46]>> Yeah. Are you going to milk yours?

[00:05:49]>> Mine?

[00:05:51]>> Oh, what is this thing?

[00:05:53]>> Whoa, calm down. It's just an alpha utter. It's a cow stress ball that sticks to flat surfaces. They're gifts from the new guy. He's a little strange.

[00:06:01]God, that guy's weird. Today, we're showing you how to de-bone a giant gummy bear. Use your chef's knife to cut along the leg and then twist until you hear the joint pop. Remove that leg bone.

[00:06:12]While you're at it, make an incision at the top of the head. This is the surve, also known as the brain, which is a delicacy in some cultures. Now, we'll remove the breast meat, cutting against the grain and pulling slightly as we slice. Set aside the dark meat. You'll want that for sandwiches tomorrow. Keep slicing. And oh. Oh, it looks like this bear had young. We'll respectfully set those aside and make sure they return to nature.

[00:06:36]Now, on to the heart. Hey, weirdo. You too ugly to take that thing off.

[00:06:40]>> Don't listen to that guy. He likes to judge people based on their appearance, but he's just a fat, ugly bully.

[00:06:45]>> Hey, loser. Want to come to my party tonight? We're going to be doing dirty Tik Tok dances.

[00:06:51]>> Yeah, right. I would never invite you.

[00:06:54]Check this out.

[00:06:58]Don't worry about him. He's just cooler, richer, and more attractive than you.

[00:07:03]So, he thinks he's better somehow.

[00:07:05]>> Hey, kid. You're suffering from a latex reaction. I can see it on your skin.

[00:07:10]Somebody. High five.

[00:07:12]>> Don't worry about him. He's just a licensed dermatologist.

[00:07:15]>> Okay. Who wants to see what this freak looks like without his mask on?

[00:07:18]>> Oh, hell yeah.

[00:07:24]Looks like Xavier wasn't from this planet.

[00:07:26]>> And so you see, now you've started an interplanetary war.

[00:07:30]>> Come here, give me YOUR UNDERWEAR. WHAT?

[00:07:33]>> I'M Gabe and I'm a human stress ball.

[00:07:37]People love giving me a squeeze. But with the new HR policy, only above the neck touching is allowed. Of course, with everything going on, I've been working a ton of overtime. I'm even working on my breaks. And with the office expanding, I need all the help I can get. So I 3D scanned and I analyzed and eventually I printed my own face to send around the world. Now everyone can relieve their stress. So now I can take a much needed vacation.

[00:08:15]I have to get out of here.

[00:08:18]>> Whoa. Yeah.

[00:08:19]>> Oh my god. What did you do? I stabbed it.

[00:08:23]>> Okay, I'm going to help you. But first, we need to hide the body. It's just a stress toy. Oh god, it's still bleeding.

[00:08:30]>> What's the big deal? I've done this before.

[00:08:33]It's a pattern.

[00:08:34]>> No, I have a channel.

[00:08:35]>> Oh my god. You film it?

[00:08:37]>> People like it.

[00:08:38]>> Uh-oh. Have you read the comments?

[00:08:41]>> What? What is happening? Oh, if the cops ever find out about this.

[00:08:45]>> Why would THE COPS?

[00:08:48]>> WE GOT TO tip him up.

[00:08:49]>> Merry mother of God. You're under arrest, sicko. Gotham, Henderson.

[00:08:54]Henderson, that ain't going to be enough for this psychopath.

[00:08:56]>> You guys know this is a stress toy, right?

[00:08:58]>> Henderson, you're better than this.

[00:09:00]There ain't enough justice left in this cold, cruel world. Henderson, no.

[00:09:03]>> Wait, wait, wait, wait. Can we just talk about it? THIS IS DON'T shoot me.

[00:09:07]Peterson.

[00:09:10]>> We're not my precinct, punk.

[00:09:13]>> What?

[00:09:13]>> Let's go.

[00:09:15]>> SAMUELS. NO.

[00:09:17]>> HEY, it's okay. I'm sure he'll come right back.

[00:09:20]>> Yeah, like how Jones made it back.

[00:09:22]Something must be going on. Everyone's getting called up to battle.

[00:09:25]>> I'm scared.

[00:09:27]>> Scared? You boys don't know what fear is.

[00:09:31]>> You've seen action. I've been down in the depths. I've seen things you can't conceive.

[00:09:38]>> Wait, we got wounded coming in. Are you okay?

[00:09:42]>> I don't have much left in me. But neither do you.

[00:09:45]>> God, they're not going to use me to TP another house again, are they? Is somebody making a mummy costume?

[00:09:50]>> Worse.

[00:09:51]They bought a new hot sauce. It's called Rectal Reckoning. That's Ghost Pepper Spice, but it tastes so good, they're eating a lot. That's the perfect storm.

[00:10:01]What are we going to do?

[00:10:04]We should surrender.

[00:10:06]>> You always say that. Bed the day.

[00:10:08]>> Everybody back. That's a time portal.

[00:10:10]They're pretty dangerous, but as long as no one steps inside of it, we're totally blink.

[00:10:15]>> Noah.

[00:10:15]>> Dude, she said this was a time vortex.

[00:10:17]Why wouldn't I go into it?

[00:10:18]>> Get back here now.

[00:10:20]>> No way. I got to show you guys my iPhone. They're totally going to Wait.

[00:10:25]>> Everything that goes through this portal is going to be transformed just like your clothes.

[00:10:28]>> I can live without modern convenience. I mean, look, they're selling cars for $100. I have that in my wallet.

[00:10:35]What happened to my $100 bill?

[00:10:36]>> Oh, yeah. Inflation works both ways, I'm afraid.

[00:10:39]>> Still, life here can't be that bad. I mean, I still got all my coupons. See?

[00:10:44]Free labbotomy.

[00:10:46]>> No, ignore that one. There's a reason people live longer now.

[00:10:48]>> Plus, I think you just got drafted.

[00:10:51]>> Okay, how do I get out of here?

[00:10:53]>> We need an object to bridge the gap.

[00:10:55]Something that hasn't changed in like 80 years. Oh, use my Kit Kat clock. It was invented in the 30s, but it's still made by the same company today.

[00:11:04]>> Quick, the portal's closing. Get ready to hold on.

[00:11:07]>> Got it.

[00:11:10]See? No harm done. You sure about that?

[00:11:14]>> That's a guy.

[00:11:15]>> I think I need a labbotomy.

[00:11:17]>> And don't forget, use VAT 55 or scan the QR code to get 55% off at scent. Thanks for watching. Fat 19.