BITCHIN'- Independent Short Film

Added: 2026-05-26

[00:00:14][music] [music] Dear diary, it all started with a boy.

[00:00:34]Not just any boy. The most perf boy, Eric.

[00:00:57]Unfortunately for me, Eric was dating Jess, the sneakiest, sneakiest, stankiest [ __ ] ever.

[00:01:11]>> That girl, she looks >> where you're going.

[00:01:16]She's bitchicious. The boys, they scream her name. They're blowing kisses. SHE'S EVERYBODY'S PRINCESS. OH, SHE'S been delicious.

[00:01:24]>> Eric was perfect.

[00:01:26]Jess was my enemy. Or so I thought. But I think I'm getting ahead of myself.

[00:01:34]Anyways, diary, Eric and I were having one of our daily phone calls.

[00:01:40][laughter] So yeah, >> that's why I decided to switch to Tommy Hilfiger cologne instead of Axe Body Spray. You smelling on me today?

[00:01:56]>> Uh yeah. Uh so yummy.

[00:02:02]Um, so [clears throat] Jess was complaining about you again at lunch today.

[00:02:10]>> What? What did the wicked [ __ ] of the West say about me this time?

[00:02:15]>> A bit harsh is balls.

[00:02:16]>> Not untrue, though. Remember that one time she wore that absolutely hideous top and kept saying it's from Italy when I literally saw it at [laughter] limited 2.

[00:02:28]You know, if you were with me, at least you'd have a girlfriend who shopped at Hot Topic.

[00:02:34]You slimy [ __ ] Who was that?

[00:02:38]>> Did I not tell you? Jess was on the other line. She was bugging me today about how much we talked.

[00:02:45]>> See, babe, I know she wants to steal you. Izzy, you are severely mistaken if you think I let you anywhere near him.

[00:02:52]>> WELL, YOU CAN'T STOP ME, [ __ ] >> You want to bet?

[00:02:57]>> Yeah. Yeah, I do actually.

[00:02:59]>> Well, you'd have to get through ME FIRST.

[00:03:02]>> IS THAT A THREAT?

[00:03:04]>> What if it is? Well, then then I guess I'd have to meet you at school tomorrow.

[00:03:09]I guess so. Front steps 11:30 a.m.

[00:03:12]Sharp. Be there. I will. So will I.

[00:03:20]>> I hate her. I hate her. I hate her. I hate her. [screaming] Let's do this.

[00:03:44]>> Good morning, sweetie. Do you want some chai tea to start your day?

[00:03:49]>> Not today, Mom. Get me the protein shake. Chocolate.

[00:03:52]>> Okay, hun. Toaster strudel, >> obviously. and extra frosting. Now, get out. I have to get ready. Today is going to be stressful.

[00:04:43]Hope I didn't keep you waiting. Let's just get this over with.

[00:04:48]Wait, do the thumbs go inside or out?

[00:04:54]I think in that feels right.

[00:04:57]Wait, but what about my nails? I got them done yesterday. Oh my god. Did Samantha do those? She does mine, too.

[00:05:04]She's just so good. How much was that diamond accent nail? Aren't you guys supposed to be like fighting or something? Right. Yeah.

[00:05:15]>> [bell] >> punch me or something. Well, if I start, I'm going to get in trouble. Well, if I start, I'll get in trouble. Just like start at the same time or something.

[00:05:27]>> Yeah. That count us down.

[00:05:29]>> Three, two, Wait, wait. Do we go on one or do we go on go?

[00:05:33]>> Um, go. Was that the go?

[00:05:35]>> No.

[00:05:36]>> Three, two, one, GO.

[00:05:45]STOP.

[00:05:56]>> [screaming] >> NO, [crying] MY NAIL.

[00:06:13][crying] My nail is broken, TOO.

[00:06:18][screaming] [crying] >> [screaming] >> It's okay. [laughter] It's okay. We We can probably still glue them back on.

[00:06:30]>> I think I have some nail glue on my purse.

[00:06:35]>> This is so stupid. Why do we want to fight anyway? Wasn't this your idea?

[00:06:39]>> I thought it was yours.

[00:06:41]>> Wait, like how did this even start?

[00:06:53]I just I don't know how to talk good. This stupid teacher always makes me do like grammar and speak out loud.

[00:07:05]I hate when people make me do things, you know. Oh, >> you poor thing. Let me help you with your orals.

[00:07:12]>> You know, the teacher says I give really good ones.

[00:07:16]that [ __ ] >> Ew. No, I would never do that >> to Eric or to our teacher.

[00:07:29]>> But you said >> I meant with our English class.

[00:07:33]>> My god. This whole time.

[00:07:35]>> I guess it didn't help that Eric always said you hated me.

[00:07:38]>> He said you hated me.

[00:07:39]>> I don't hate you.

[00:07:41]>> Me neither.

[00:07:45]Eric is such a [ __ ] [laughter] >> Do you want to walk to English together?

[00:07:52]Eric will be so mad. [clears throat] Totally.

[00:07:58]So, diary, it started with a dumb boy and it ended with a BFF. Crazy story, huh?

[00:08:31]Let's go mission.

[00:09:26]Hello.

[00:09:28]Huh? Heat. Heat. N.