Why a Toxic Person Is Most Dangerous When the Bank Account Is Empty

Added: 2026-05-09

[00:00:05]What is going on, beautiful people? Lee Hammock, your favorite. You can have a favorite diagnosed narcissist here with another episode today, y'all. Today, we're talking about the broke toxic person, the broke manipulator, damn near the broke narcissist. What happens when a narcissist or a toxic person loses all of their funds? What happens? What goes on in the mind of that type of person?

[00:00:34]When they long no longer have that, no longer have that dough, what goes on in that in that noggin. We going to call it the noggin and whatnot. But we going to hop right into it, y'all.

[00:00:47]narcissistic people.

[00:00:53]>> Money becomes >> tool of manipulation. Let's just keep it hot. Let's just keep it ready. Money becomes a tool of manipulation. They just use money for status. The status the the type of status manipulation.

[00:01:10]They use money to manipulate partners.

[00:01:12]Financial Y'all hear the term financial abuse all the time. A lot of narcissistic people will absolutely financially abu use and abuse the people that they are dealing with. You ever wonder why your partner when they have a lot of money, you can't tell them nothing. Like you can't tell like you can't tell them nothing. They don't want you can tell them something but they're not trying to hear it. Right? You can tell them whatever you want to tell them but they but they not trying to hear it at all. Right? They're not trying to hear it. They don't want to talk to you.

[00:01:39]They don't want to nothing. But when things are going bad, you see the flip.

[00:01:53]You see the personality flip. You see the personality change up really quickly when you're dealing with somebody like this, especially when they lose access to what they supposed to have, right?

[00:02:04]When they have money, you can't tell them nothing. But when they don't have it, you can tell them what everything you want to do, but they still won't be listening to it. and they still don't care to the point where it's going to change their their mindsets, right? They will take try to take take your money. A narcissistic person or this type of person right here, this manipulative person will absolutely feel entitled to your money. Feel entitled to what you have.

[00:02:29]That's what they do. They will absolutely feel entitled to what you have. Isn't that crazy? Isn't that crazy as hell right there? Like that is insane how they can absolutely go and feel entitled to what you have in this situation right here. Because when you have a narcissistic person like this, a person like this, a manipulative person like this who's acting on like this impulse or acting on this money type of stuff right here, they will ab absolutely keep losing it. Like they use money for their safety. Money, if I have money, at least a little job or something like that, I feel safe. I feel like I'm in control of everything. When a narcissistic person loses money, when they lose it, that's when things go crazy right there. You see what I'm saying? When they lose it, because now they don't feel safe. Now they don't feel like they have any type of power.

[00:03:16]Now they don't feel like they have any type of control or whatever the case may be. Right? This is what goes on in their mind. [clears throat] If I have money, I'm in control. Especially if I have a lot of it. When I don't have money, there is a lack of control. This is why a broke narcissist, a broke toxic person, a broke manipulator is a dangerous person.

[00:03:41]Because I know y'all hear the I know everybody here has heard the platitude, uh, money is the root of all evil. It's not money. Money does not the root of all evil. It's the lack of money. It's the chasing of the money. Right? Because money in a different societies, money doesn't exist. Were people people taking each other's lives and stuff like that over it? No. You hear these stories all the time on the news, whatever that the partner decided that they were broke.

[00:04:07]So, they decided to take out five take out 17 insurance policies on their husband or their wife and then a month after the insurance policies kicked in, they murdered them. What? You know what I'm saying? Isn't that crazy as hell?

[00:04:20]That's crazy. It's just like they want to like a broke narcissist, a broke toxic person, a broke deceiver is a dangerous ass person. You you say you see these these first 48s all the time.

[00:04:31]Like the armed robbery at at the grocery store. Like what the hell we doing?

[00:04:37]He killed three people to take and he got $2 from it because he was broke.

[00:04:40]Like that's crazy.

[00:04:43]That type of stuff right there is crazy.

[00:04:45]You see what I'm saying? But this is what happens when you have a broke manipulative person, a broke toxic person. they will absolutely keep doing all of this over and over and over again because that's what goes on in the mind right it's like the more I have the more in control that I feel and the less I have the less control I feel right here you see what I'm saying because this is why you get a lot of especially the more overt malignant narcissist the more money they have or even if they broke you can have a broke narcissist that fakes you hear the term fake it till you make it you can have a broke bummy bum ass narcissist or toxic person right out here faking the funk, dressing nice, dressing expensive. Uh, and what you call it, it dgate. They got DHGate all on on speed dial expedited shipping.

[00:05:31]DHGate. They dressing nice, dressing fancy, whole time broke as hell. They want to keep up their image. This is why money is so important to narcissistic people. It's like money, it's like, it really is. I want to be able to keep up my image. I want to be able to have feel like I have control or something like that. And y'all understand I I do so many one-on- ones with people over Zoom where people are just saying like leave.

[00:05:52]When I first met them, I actually thought that they were wealthy. They had everything. Had nice clothes, nice everything. But then it turns out they had a negative net worth.

[00:06:04]A negative net worth. They didn't have any money at all. They didn't have any type of money at all. They just they were just faking it until they got in.

[00:06:12]They told me they had they owned a business. They told me this. They told me that. But when we got married or whatever, we started finally started living together. I was like, "Hey, where's the money at for the bills and they never did have it." They said they were waiting on a deposit or waiting on somebody to pay an invoice and the invoice was never paid lately. I don't know what to do. I don't know what what happened here. People like this continue to do it all this type of stuff right here. That's where it goes. They brag all the time. Yeah, a lot of them do, right? A lot of them do. A lot of narcissistic people will brag, but not necessarily covert narcissist. Covert narcissists with money are more they still they might drive a nice car but they this is the type of narcissist that is kind of like faking the funk the other way. Right? If a covert narcissist has a lot of money, they tend to not show it. Right?

[00:07:03]This is the type of person that will dress nice dress lowkey nice. They're not loud with it. They're not peacocking. They'll dress low-key nice and stuff like that because they want people they don't necessarily want people to know. They want people to know they have a little bit of status, but they want to have this this air of like mysteriousness, right? They want this air of mystery like what's this person about right here? They dress kind of nice, but I don't know what they got.

[00:07:27]The covert narcissist are going to be different. Covert people are going to be different and whatnot. So, this is what happens right here.

[00:07:34]My ex was a student and I was paying all the bills and he would take his student loan refunds right to high-end clothing stores. Then say he looked down on the poor. Oh, dear Lord. You see what I'm saying? He she was taking care of this grown man who was in school and he would get his refund check and and go buy high-end stuff to fake the funk. Y'all see literally a clear example of it right there. Clear example of it right there. That's what ends up happening.

[00:08:01]They take the money from you and fake the funk. This is exactly what they do.

[00:08:06]They will do this type of stuff because it benefits them in the long run. It really it really really does cuz they I go here spend my like she said her her student ex would take his money take his refund check and spend it on high-end stuff to go out here and pretend to have money. He's worried about his image.

[00:08:26]Image control, image maintenance is important. Then this is why when narcissistic people lose money, when they go broke, they get dangerous because their image is out of control. I can't control my image with stuff that I'm buying from Walmart. And yes, I love Walmart, y'all. This shirt is from Walmart. Yeah, stuff that I'm buying from Walmart. I can't control my image.

[00:08:43]I don't look like I have money with this this out out of boundary shirt on, whatever the case may be. This is not Louis. This is Outbound Out of Bounds or whatever case, whatever Walmart brand is, right? That's what they do. They want to protect their brands and stuff like that. His car is old, but he spent money for the divorce, upgrading the engine. Yeah. Is it paid off? It's paid off. It's paid off.

[00:09:07]It's paid off or whatever. I'll answer I'll answer questions that are not about the topic later on. I'll do a Q&A later on. Um, but this is what, like I said, narcissistic people when they do go broke, they will absolutely get dangerous, right? Because like I said, when they have money, they're in control. when they don't have it, they lose control because they want to they if they have money and let's just say they are the financial providers in your household.

[00:09:32]When they have money, I'm telling you, they treat you horribly. They'll say things like, "Look, y'all will agree that you will be the stay-at-home parent or whatever, and they'll make the money, and they'll and then they'll say crazy ass stuff to you like, "Without me, you wouldn't have this life that you have.

[00:09:47]Without me, without my income, you would be nothing." And you like, "Wait, I was working till you told me not to to agree not to. What are you talking about?

[00:09:55]Without me, you're nothing. I run this house. I pay the bills here. You going to do nothing." You like, "Okay, I'll go get a job." "No, the hell you won't. Why we go get a job? You have pay more bill." Then we have to pay daycare and tell. No, no, don't do that. But you can't you can't keep holding money over my head. I'm not holding money. Have to be real.

[00:10:13]So when that card when they when that type of stuff happens and that card starts getting declined that's when you have narcissistic people that will blow a gasket.

[00:10:24]Some of them will absolutely blow a gasket like on things like this when this type of stuff start to happen. So this is what you got to watch out for.

[00:10:31]I'm just telling you this is what you have to watch out for. If y'all just joining from YouTube, make sure you hit the uh thumbs up button and whatnot and drop a uh comment in the comment section. I'll do a Q&A later on. Um but that's it right there. I'm just telling you this is the mindset. This is the mentality. They will keep doing this stuff over and over again. Like, and if you if they if you have the money, cuz you you do get the gold digger narcissistic people, right? If you have the money, they might absolutely feel entitled to your money at the same time.

[00:11:00]You see what I'm saying? If you have the money, they'll feel entitled to your money. And gold diggers can be both male and female or non-gender uh non-binary, whatever, trans. You have a trans gold digger, right? Doesn't matter. Gender is irrelevant here when the gold diggers are coming out. But they will make it feel like your money is their money. And that's all they and that's all they care about. So when you have the money, they feel entitled to your money. And when you try to cut them off, that's when they lose their damn minds. That's when you might lose their partner, right? It's all about the money. They don't really truly care about you, right? They don't really truly care about you. And this is the type of stuff that continuously happens over and over again. They don't care.

[00:11:43]They don't care. My ex said, My ex said to tell me that. My ex said that to me that he worked hard to give us everything we had. I make more than double he did before he quit his job four years ago. You see, there you go right there. You see, literally there go right there. They will claim everything is theirs. Yep. Even if they don't pay any bills, even if they don't pay have any income coming in, even if they don't do anything like that, 100% they will make it seem like you're still uh it's all mine.

[00:12:12]But especially if they do pay the bills, they will 100% do the same type of thing. They'll say, "This is definitely all mine." Right? That's crazy as hell.

[00:12:20]You know, my ex was on double My ex was on double what I earned, but soon ran out of money and I was lending it to him. He blamed it on his toxic exes wanting more child support. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:12:30]Don't y'all I'm not talking to you right here in this is just in general. If you have a part if you get with a partner and they're behind on child support, y'all you're going to end up paying that like how y'all paying to take care of somebody else's kids you just met. Not you, not the person I just talked to, but it's just in general. I stop doing that, [snorts] you know? But I'm just saying like here. So, do narcissists have a pimp mentality? Some very well made some narcissist because like that's when they think they're entitled to every money, every type of money that you make, right? All the money that you make, I should get a piece of or I'm entitled to. You know that pimp mentality is you use your body, go out there, make the money, you give it to me, and I'll divvy it up as I see as I see fit. That's that pimp mentality right there. Yes. So that some of them do have that mentality. I think all pimps, especially the horrible evil ones that beating on they beating on they uh I guess they're escorted to workers or whatever, they are just psychopaths, right? You got to be a psychopath to think you are entitled to somebody's mind, body, and soul and stuff like that. You you kind of have to be, you know, but if you have if you're dealing with a broke narcissist that's always begging you for money or broke manipulator, they'll I'm just telling you, don't let them play on your prayer on your heartstrings. They'll be asking you for money constantly and not wanting to get a job, not wanting to work. they will choose not to work. Y'all know how many people how many people I talked to how many y'all know just in general in America when when you talk about stay at home parents is normally the woman, right? I've talked to people in situation before on my my Zoom calls where both people were working, the man got fired and the woman was working and having to take care of the kids and stuff like that for years. The man just refused to get another job. He set his lazy ass on the couch for 14 years.

[00:14:14]Still expected meals. Still didn't help with the kids and stuff like that. And when she divorced him, guess what? When she finally decided she wanted to divorce him after his big stinking lazy ass sat on the couch for 14 years, guess what he did? He went and took alimony out on her because he said he was accustomed to a certain type of lifestyle.

[00:14:32]Don't let if you have a able-bodied partner that is choosing not saying they can't find a job and it goes on for years. Y'all imagine paying alimony to get to get this person out of your life because some of them will feel entitled to it. Like this man sat his stanking ass on the couch for 14 years, didn't try to get a job. And then when she finally decided that she had enough and kicked him out, he's like, "I'll see you in court." Got e look. And the court gave him emergency alimony. Emergency alimony to a grown ass man, a grown able-bodied man. A grown able-bodied man. He got out emergency alimony. And so she was left taking care of the kids.

[00:15:10]And still he still didn't do nothing for the kids. So he got to he moved out, took the money that she was giving him and got an apartment for himself and just set his staking ass in there for a couple for at least I think the next year and a half, two years until the alimony had stopped and then he finally got a job two years later. So he set he said he had to chill for 16 years. Stop letting people take advantage of you like that, y'all. That's what a manipulator will do. They'll make you feel like I can't just find a job anywhere. Like I don't want to just find any job. I'm overqualified for these jobs. 15, 16, 17 years. It's crazy.

[00:15:41]Crazy. Y'all got to stop taking care of grown. Like, and this is going to sound sexist, but stop taking care of grown, able-bodied ass men. They are bums.

[00:15:48]Especially they just choose not to work.

[00:15:49]They are bums. Those are bum ass people.

[00:15:51]Stop taking care of bumps. You So, I got a couple minutes, y'all, for a few questions. I filed for divorce yesterday after 19 years. Uh, hubby does the I'm in the home when he isn't having an affair. I'm on the house right now and something told me to Google my address to home for sale. Oh, he's trying to sell your house while you're still living in it. Oh, dear Lord. You don't you have to sign paperwork for that to happen? I'm actually I'm actually a real estate agent in North Carolina. Don't you have to sign paperwork for your house to be sold?

[00:16:17]Yes. He spent more energy trying to do the bare minimum than it would be to find a Y. You see what I'm saying? This is what people would do. This is what people This is literally what people would do. Emergency alimony. That's disgusting. For a grown ass able-bodied man, but like again y'all, this is what she allowed to happen for 14 years. And when she decided to get divorced, he took her for alimony. He's like, "I have a I'm accustomed to a certain type of lifestyle. I haven't worked for 14 years. What do you expect me to do? I can't just find a job. I have a huge gap in my resume. What do you expect me to do?"

[00:16:44]And the court said, "Hey, bang. Hit the gavvel." She was she was mad as hell.

[00:16:48]She was okay to be she she ended up getting getting over it because like eventually when court started to happen more, he had to pay child support because he wouldn't take care of the kids. So, it kind of canceled out. The alimony end up canceling out after the child support orders and stuff went through. So, she didn't necessarily have to pay for a while. It's crazy, y'all.

[00:17:04]But anyway, y'all, I do have to hop off this thing, y'all. I got to hop off here. Mentalillness.net for my one-on-one coaching. I actually just started doing Telegram coach. I do text message coaching as well. I have text message sessions available. It's limited slot every week because I want to get allocate enough time for every person.

[00:17:19]You can find everything at mentalheenness.net.

[00:17:21]My text message, Telegram. I do voice notes back and forth. Telegram sessions are up and ready, up and active on YouTube. I mean, not YouTube, on my website and whatnot, just so I can, like I said, communicate with more people.

[00:17:35]You see it right there. Telegram is up.

[00:17:37]Message me anytime and whatnot. Send me voice notes. Send me screenshots to break down. Telegram. You got to download Telegram though. Mentalness.net for all of this stuff, y'all. Hit the subscribe button if you haven't. And as always, as always, mentalness is out.

[00:17:52]Peace y'all. Have a good day. Be safe.