Former NEET Finally Sleeps At Night Before Going to Work

Added: 2026-05-24

[00:00:00]I can't believe it. I actually [ __ ] slept. You know, I had a concept for a video in the works that I never ended up recording. And now I will not need to record because it seems as though, at least for now, my sleep is finally fixed. At least for the most part. I was going to make a video called sex colon the cure for insomnia.

[00:00:30]I thought that would be a very funny title for a video. And I was just going to talk about how when I used to have sex at night before going to bed um or get my dick sucked or whatever, it would make it to where I could sleep in a very calm way and I didn't have interruptions or wake up and I would get eight hours of sleep every night.

[00:00:57]I thought that would be very funny as a concept for a video, but I will not have to record that video now because it seems like I'm doing fine in terms of sleep now.

[00:01:08]What happened was I asked for a change of medication at my doctor because I went to my doctor recently to try and figure out what is going on with these raised moles that are changing color.

[00:01:25]Now, apparently, uh, it's not anything dangerous yet, but what they did was they referred me to a dermatologist who's most likely going to remove them before they ever get dangerous, which ended up being a very good development. But while I was there, I said, you know, I don't want to take hydroxazine anymore.

[00:01:48]To be honest, I haven't taken hydroxazine in a while.

[00:01:53]I used to take it uh but what happened was I would take it every night and it would make me more forgetful and less focused during the daytime at the same time that it didn't really help me get enough hours of sleep. I would still get five or 6 hours of sleep but then I would have the added damage of the cognitive side effects of hydroxyazine.

[00:02:19]So that wasn't fun.

[00:02:22]And I asked, "Hey, can you get me on Trazadone, which is an SSRI? It's an anti-depressant, but it's often prescribed off label for sleep because it has very uh sleep inducing effects.

[00:02:39]It makes people exhausted.

[00:02:42]So, because it's safer than ambient and uh benzoazipines, both of which are habit forming narcotics, there's been this trend of prescribing it off label for sleep for quite a while now.

[00:02:59]Something I've been aware of because I've had to take the medicine before.

[00:03:04]However, during those times when I had taken the medicine, it was largely not effective for my problem or if it did help a little bit, I would have to take it with melatonin at the same time, which is what I did last night and I'm fine with that. But I would have to uh I'd have to take it that way. And moreover, it would kind of mess with my concentration the next day as well as just like my energy levels in general.

[00:03:41]But I think I can compensate that with just having a shitload of caffeine and eating dark chocolate, which is what I do every day anyway. But um that's what I did this morning and so far I still feel exhausted. But one of the added benefits of this is because I am someone who wakes up a lot during the night. I'm not entirely sure why that happens to me.

[00:04:12]It's very helpful because normally when I wake up during my sleep cycle, I have a bunch of energy right after waking up.

[00:04:21]So, let's say I fell asleep for 4 hours and then I wake up. If I wake up after those four hours, I'm going to have a bunch of energy. In most cases, for most normal people, what's going to happen is they're going to feel exhausted. They're going to feel like [ __ ] And I also feel like [ __ ] when that happens to me. The difference is my nervous system kicks into overdrive and I have too much energy uh to fall back asleep.

[00:04:55]And so as a result of that dynamic, I get into a situation where I can't get back to sleep and I just end up feeling like [ __ ] the whole day.

[00:05:09]But the added benefit of this medication is the fact that because it makes you feel exhausted, if you wake up during the night, you're just going to go back to sleep, which is what happened to me. I woke up around 12 um at midnight and I just went back to sleep. So, I I checked my watch and it said 12:34 a.m. I still remember the exact time because this is how my brain works.

[00:05:43]And then I just went back to bed and I ultimately woke up at 5 in the morning.

[00:05:49]So, I I went to sleep at 8:30 p.m. and I woke up at 5:00 a.m. And I have to wake up at 5:00 a.m. every day because I go to work. You know, I'm a a member of the proletariat. I'm a working man, unfortunately. I would really rather not be, but hey, things cost money in the world, and it's a pretty easy job, so it's not the end of the world. But that's the situation that I'm in right now. I had asked if I could get an extra day of work today. Today's Saturday. I have Saturday and Sunday off. I I asked, "Hey, can I have an extra day of work?"

[00:06:29]And she said, "Well, you got to ask the manager that's above me, but most likely she'll say yes." And I thought I took a photo of her phone number, but I didn't.

[00:06:40]And so, I was not able to call her.

[00:06:43]So today I just didn't go over there because I was not able to ask her if I could have an extra day.

[00:06:53]But I wanted to go because man, this [ __ ] is so [ __ ] easy. It's like unbelievably easy to do. Yesterday I literally just sat and watched YouTube videos for most of the day. It was crazy. I watched this this Argentine YouTuber called TomX make a Minecraft gaming computer out of a coffee uh uh a coffee maker. So he he 3D printed some [ __ ] in order to put a PC I think from AliExpress on the inside and he had a coffee maker that simultaneously made coffee while you can play Minecraft. And it was like a fun it was a fun video. And most of the other stuff I watched was just like news because I like to I like to see what the Spanish and people from other parts of that part of the world think about uh current events.

[00:07:56]But yeah, I don't know, man. I I think my sleep for now is fixed. Obviously, as my body gets more tolerant to the medication, they'll have to raise the dose. That's what happens when you're taking medications, but I feel fine about it right now. I just hope that the cognitive side effects that I'm worried about don't come to mess with me in the future in any major way. It is taking longer to wake up than it normally does. You know, normally after I have as much caffeine as I had this morning, I'm like wide awake, after half an hour, 45 minutes, it's been that amount of time and I still feel sleepy.

[00:08:44]So, I am not really a fan of how the after effects of this medication are looking to be so far, but it is what it is, right? You you win some, you lose some. I think most likely if I had continued sleeping for four, three, five, six hours a night every night like I have been for the past several months, the cognitive side effects of that and the effects on energy would have become so noticeable at some point that really it would have been worse than whatever this medication is doing to me.

[00:09:27]So, I'm not too worried about it. My body is all [ __ ] up. My brain is all [ __ ] up. Maybe at some point after having taken this medication for so long and sleeping the amount of time every night that you should be sleeping. Maybe what'll happen to me is I'll get into a situation where I don't actually need the medication anymore because I don't have all of the stress on my nervous system and my body from going every every night without sleeping properly.

[00:10:03]Because apparently the longer that you spend not sleeping, the harder it is for your body to get accustomed to sleeping again.

[00:10:16]because of uh of like extra cortisol or whatever. That's another thing I wanted to make a video about cortisol, but that was also going to be a topic that I touched on.

[00:10:31]In the original video about sleep that I had planned that I mentioned at the beginning of the video, I was going to talk about these cortisol studies that I had read and I was going to be like, "Oh, maybe this is the the unique mechanism by which my sleep was fixed back when I was able to have sex every day." Um, obviously that is not something that I'll be able to enjoy again, at least not for probably a very long time.

[00:11:02]But it is what it is, right? You know, we can't we can't all be winners in this life. But, you know, lately lately I've been getting into this schedule and this groove of things where I really feel as though life is just not that difficult of a thing. It's really not. You know, you've got certain things you're supposed to do that everybody's supposed to do and then you just do them. It's just the things you have to do or they're just the things you have to do.

[00:11:38]incorrect conjugation for a moment in English. I know nobody cares, but it gets on my nerves. I don't like it when when people say uh is instead of are, for example, when they're talking about uh something in the plural, you know, it's it's it's our people, not they is people. I mean, if it's part of your dialect, I'm fine with it because, you know, different dialects can have grammatical differences that's linguistically and morally neutral. But there are a lot of people that speak a dialect of English where there are certain rules that are present and those people don't follow those rules. In casual speech, a lot of rules get broken.

[00:12:29]a lot of rules mainly about conjugation.

[00:12:32]I mean, people will use the singular when it's supposed to be plural and it gets on my nerves, but it is what it is, right? Uh I don't I don't complain when people do that. I just notice it. There's like something in my head that's like analyzing all of these errors and I don't know how to turn it off. It just shows up. That's why I say whom in my videos. I had somebody point that out one day.

[00:13:01]They said, "Why do you say whom in your videos? Are you trying to sound smarter than other people?" And I'm like, "No, it's just the way my brain works. I know how to use that word properly, even though it has largely been eliminated from speech in English. you know, in writing you'll still see it sometimes.

[00:13:29]Even in writing, a lot of the time people break the the rules, but people people don't know how to use it anymore.

[00:13:39]Um, and like it's not difficult to figure out if you've ever watched a TV show and they say to whom it may concern.

[00:13:50]Well, you've already got an idea of what you're supposed to say or or how it works. Um, with whom do you bank?

[00:14:01]Come on, man. Let's let's figure this out. You know whom is an object pronoun.

[00:14:07]So you use it when somebody or something is receiving the action of a verb or if it's following a preposition. It's very easy. You know whom did you invite?

[00:14:18]Obviously in to invite is a verb.

[00:14:24]So whom goes at the beginning because it's the object of the verb. How does who what's who's who's receiving the action?

[00:14:36]You know, how does the the verb affect them? Or or you know, the object of a preposition, you say to whom did you speak, right? Um you know, you spoke to him, so you use whom. Now, that's another way you can think about this.

[00:14:52]You you can think so him, her, etc. Okay. Well, if you can say him or her there, to him did you speak to her did you speak? That sounds really strange. But if you say to whom, it makes more sense. So there are easy ways to figure this stuff out, but maybe I just have an intuitive sense of grammar. I think everybody has an intuitive sense of grammar for their own language.

[00:15:24]But obviously many people do not follow the rules if the social environment that they come from is not one in which those rules are followed. Because ultimately language in terms of how we develop it, in terms of how we use it, uh is ultimately uh the the product of the social environment, the social forces that exist around us and ultimately mold our behavior and conception of the world. So, there's a lot going on with that. But I am autistic and I have a very high level of attention to detail.

[00:16:13]So, I notice these things and I think about them. I think to some extent perhaps I have also trained myself to notice them and think about them over the years out of sheer interest due to the fact that I find this stuff fascinating. Um, I like how languages work. I like the bones of them. I like um I like to know that I am speaking in agreement with or in in accordance with the the rules as as they've historically existed or as they're written of a language. you know that that's why um you know for example in in Spanish there are certain aspects of casual speech that I've picked up on where I realize okay the people uh talk like this but in the written language there are certain rules that um that that are that are more obvious right um that people may not necessarily follow.

[00:17:29]Like for example, you know, if if you take the verb a which is is to is to have but not to have something which is it's uh to to have like in an abstract sense.

[00:17:45]Um it it also means uh I mean it it means when you conjugate it it means a lot of things like if you take the conjugation I it it means there are right or aba which is what is it the predate past tense I forget the exact name but uh it's it's like the habitual past um it you know it's like there were is what that means. But there's also ubble which also means there were but it in a more uh closed sense like okay there were and that is it's not a habitual thing in the past it's totally done right. What's interesting is for example somebody might say uh much lasas there had been many houses but the thing is with that verb and and you can see why somebody would would make that mistake right uh because in general um in Spanish everything has to correspond respond the the conjugation has to of the verb is based on number and gender. But with that verb a it does not work that way. And there there's a reason why.

[00:19:12]But uh the correct thing that you would say there is um you would say abos um or muchas there there had been many houses. Um, and if you think about this in a different context, like if I were to say I muchos, there are many. That would sound perfectly normal, you know. Uh, no, nobody would question that. You hear that all the time. So, why in the past tense do you change it all of a sudden to to a plural form? It's it's already used. The verb is already used to refer to singular or plural. Now, when you think of it like that, it starts to make more sense.

[00:19:56]And so, for that reason, you know, it would make sense to if you're going to say there's going to be a lot of something. So, so you would say vaos um I don't know much um you could say either of those things but in casual speech a lot of people especially in Latin America will say van vanos incendios there are going to be many fires now van if you're talking about aos ores uh which are you knowes is is you all plural and aos is uh is them which is obviously plural. Uh okay that makes sense. So in general if you're talking about the plural of something it makes sense to to for to go for the verb to go which is you would use the the plural form. However, again, in this case, because we're we're using um this this verb for uh for to have in an abstract sense or or for there to be, however you would like to translate that, there's something else going on here. Um and so we have to uh we we have to um to remember that this verb does not is is not uh conjugated uh in this way if we're we're using this other verb.

[00:21:44]Um there's a lot going on here. I don't know. I I've been talking for a long time. I got really annoyed when I watched a YouTube video the other day. I was watching an Estonian woman speak Spanish and she said lost.

[00:22:06]I It literally hurt my ears to hear.

[00:22:08]It's whenever you use that's always going to be followed by the subjunctive mood. And and because dur which is to last um is uh is an ar verb the the subjunctive or one of the subjunctive conjugations is is going to end with e. Um same thing with which is to speak you know it's if um if I said I don't know right um always triggers the subjunctive mood and so you would not say ablas which is in the uh what is that called the indicative conjugation for to which is the informal u in the majority of Spanish countries uh you you would use abless right abs which is in the subjunctive. And so it ends in e s rather than as s. And so I I use it for as long as it works.

[00:23:13]Although a literal translation of that would be it I use until that it lasts or or until that lasts which does not make any sense in English. But, uh, the actual translation, if you want to understand the meaning, is I use it for as long as it lasts. Um, and so I heard this Estonian woman make what to me seemed like a really obvious mistake.

[00:23:40]It's a like if you listen to a lot of Spanish, if you're talking to a lot of Spanish speakers and you're paying attention to how they speak, it's super obvious that that that's a mistake, right? Um, but she for whatever reason just I don't know didn't know despite speaking the language for much longer than me.

[00:24:02]So I'm not sure what's going on there. I have an obsession with grammar.

[00:24:09]Some people might call me a grammar cell. I believe that would be appropriate.

[00:24:14]But I'm living in the world and that's all you need to know. I had a good night of sleep.