Intro to Buddhism and Meditation with Jeff Zlotnik

[00:00:16]all join palms and repeat after me.

[00:00:22]I take refuge in the Buddha. I take refuge in the Buddha.

[00:00:27]>> I take refuge in the dharma.

[00:00:31]I take refuge in the SA.

[00:00:36]>> Keeping the palms joined [bell] [bell] >> [bell] >> Put the palms up.

[00:01:36]All right. Good evening everybody. Nice to see you all. Thank you for showing up. Um, anyone here for the first time?

[00:01:45]Welcome. What brings you here?

[00:01:48]>> Guidance.

[00:01:49]Is that what you said?

[00:01:51]>> From >> this guy. [laughter] Do you know much about my life? You want guidance from me?

[00:01:59]>> I would leave now, man.

[00:02:02]Glad you're here. If you can leave those open pushing back up, >> then you can come closer. Yeah.

[00:02:11]Thanks.

[00:02:13]Yeah, we want the air coming through.

[00:02:16]Appreciate it.

[00:02:17]um guidance. I will do my best. How's that?

[00:02:22]>> Yeah. No pressure or anything, right?

[00:02:25]The other brand new guy in the back who I just yelled at to open the window.

[00:02:29]Welcome. First time here. That's usually where first- timers sit is all the way in the back. So then if they hate it, they can just sneak out. But what brings you here? Right after you finish opening both those windows, please go ahead.

[00:02:40]Thanks. That's clearly why you're here.

[00:02:42]What brings you here?

[00:02:44]>> That was it. Thank you.

[00:02:47]you're going to do just fine here, man.

[00:02:50]The the the difference, you know, this guy wants guidance. You just want to learn how to open windows. Welcome to the Dharmabum Temple. It's kind of what this place is like. Um yeah, this the beauty of this practice is life is always just going to hammer you.

[00:03:05]Always.

[00:03:07]I mean, this is the very first thing the Buddha said, life is filled with duka, suffering, discomfort, angst, dissatisfaction.

[00:03:15]That's what he said. It's the first thing he said. He said it for 45 years and for 2500 years people still that exact same thing. The challenge when you begin to engage in Buddhist practice, learn about it, things like that is people often want to quickly escape from that first piece. Like, well, life is suffering. This sucks. I don't want that. Where's where's the out of it?

[00:03:42]Where's the ending of it? How do I get away from it?

[00:03:46]But you have to be with it. It doesn't just disappear just because you go to Buddhist classes for three months and think all the sudden suffering is going to be gone. You know, it is. You got seats, guys. Come on up. There's Yeah, it's cooler up here also temperature- wise, not like, you know, being cool.

[00:04:04]Um, the suffering is always there. And to me, one of the beauties of Buddhist practice is it it doesn't change. So many things in our lives change constantly.

[00:04:19]And Buddhist teachings don't change. And that makes it really beautiful because it just means you have to practice the very simple fundamental core basic teachings which begin with understanding that life is filled with dooka.

[00:04:39]discomfort, angst, dissatisfaction.

[00:04:42]And if you're brand new or relatively new to Buddhism, it's like, well, that sucks, right? Why would I want to do that? But the second, third, and fourth part of this path help you explore that suffering. But you got to be willing to be with the suffering.

[00:04:57]That's this practice.

[00:05:00]And what I've [snorts] seen over and over and over again in a place like this for the last 20 years is people not wanting to be with their suffering and wanting to get the quick escape, the quick fix, the quick out, the quick ignoring what's going on.

[00:05:15]Um the pointing the fingers, the blame.

[00:05:18]It's everyone else's fault. Anyone here ever blame anyone else for the problems in your life? Yeah, I don't think I need to finish that question. Right. But this is looking at what is our suffering. And uh I found that to be of all the four steps on the four noble truths the most profound and most powerful because the more you can sit with it, the more you can see it, the more you can explore it, the more you can learn to be okay with it. Then the rest begins.

[00:05:48]But if you say, "Okay, life is filled with this comfort, anxious, satisfaction." All right, cool. But now what? Do you actually think that the suffering is not going to continue in other ways? It absolutely will.

[00:06:02]We don't escape it.

[00:06:08]There's one way and one way only that we escape suffering, that we end suffering.

[00:06:13]And what is that?

[00:06:16]>> Nope.

[00:06:19]>> Say again.

[00:06:21]>> Nope.

[00:06:24]Nope.

[00:06:28]>> Thank you. Somebody's paid attention.

[00:06:30]So, the first one over here, which is always the go-to, not always, but often, is to be enlightened. That an enlightened being wouldn't suffer, that they wouldn't experience suffering.

[00:06:38]Enlightened beings would still experience suffering.

[00:06:41]If you're enlightened and you um you know, cut your leg, you're going to feel that pain. That is suffering.

[00:06:49]The only way according to the Buddha to free yourself from suffering is >> not to be born.

[00:06:55]>> Not to be born. Now, how many of you came here tonight because you don't want to have a rebirth?

[00:07:00]Nobody.

[00:07:02]So, we have all signed up for the path of suffering. So, embrace it for a while. It's okay. It is okay to suffer.

[00:07:12]It is okay to sit with the pain and the sadness and the fear and the loneliness and the anger and the depression and all of those things. It's okay.

[00:07:25]How many of you seen Goodwill Hunting?

[00:07:27]One of the best movies ever if you haven't seen it, you know. And this and actually today I think ironically enough is Robin Williams would have been his 75th birthday.

[00:07:36]Um, but that scene where he's uh he's with um I'm forgetting the character's name.

[00:07:44]Yeah. Well, Matt Damon, but the character in the movie. Um, but there you go. Thank you, Will. Good Will Hunting. Thank you. Yeah, that scene where he's sitting with Will, right? Um, is so powerful where he's in his office and he's almost like shaking him and he's like, "It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. It's okay to cry. It's okay to suffer. So life is filled with suffering and it's okay.

[00:08:12]And if you can embrace that and abide with that and be with that when you suffer, it will make the suffering so much easier. But if you come to this practice thinking that like I'm just going to figure all this out and all my suffering is going to go away.

[00:08:26]You're going to spend the rest of your life trying to do that and then you're going to die. And based on ancient Indian teachings anyways, you're going to be reborn and do it all over again. I mean, most people here, if not all, don't believe in that anyway.

[00:08:41]So, it's kind of irrelevant, but um guaranteed to it. Learn to love it.

[00:08:47]Learn to love the suffering and um you'll get through it. All right. And then you can work on two, three, and four, which is really just learning to open windows anyway. So, we're good. All right. So, we're going to start with the meditation practice because that's what most people show up here for thinking that's going to fix them. A couple things to tell you before we begin.

[00:09:07]Nothing's going to happen to you. You're not going to float away. You're not going to have any mystical magical experiences. The mind that races all day long. It's not going to shut off. Don't judge your practice, meaning you don't ask yourself, is it working or not working? Are you doing it right or wrong? We're just going to sit. We're going to breathe. You'll hear sound.

[00:09:23]Sounds inside, sounds outside. This is life. Life is filled with chaos. And this practice is learning to get quiet and still within all of the chaos posture. Just want to be comfortable. If you're on a cushion, often it helps lying to the front third, pushing the stomach forward, allows the back to straighten, shoulders are relaxed, hands are on the knees or lap. If you're on a bench or chair, however you're seated, also just trying to sit up straight, relaxing the shoulders.

[00:09:48]Move, simply move. You need to cough, simply cough. It's all right.

[00:09:53]I'll guide us as we begin. We'll settle into a little bit of silence. Just do not expect silence.

[00:10:00]Do not try to shut the mind off. It will continue to race.

[00:10:13][bell] And starting with the eyes closed if comfortable or slightly open.

[00:10:52]Mouth is open or closed.

[00:10:58]We'll start with taking three deep breaths slowly.

[00:11:45]And eventually settle into a natural rhythm of the breath.

[00:11:51][clears throat] Noticing the mind as it wanders, jumping from thought to thought.

[00:12:19]Start with gently guiding the attention focus to the stomach or chest.

[00:12:32]Breathing in, feel them rise.

[00:12:40]Breathing out, feel them fall.

[00:12:59]Simply continue this practice observing sensation of breath expecting Nothing but to sit and breathe.

[00:13:36][clears throat] >> [cough] >> As the mind wanders lost in thought, recognize it.

[00:15:48]Release that thought.

[00:15:52]Return attention, focus to the breath.

[00:17:05]>> [clears throat] [clears throat] >> Where's your mind?

[00:19:55]Lost in thought.

[00:20:03]Return attention, focus to the breath.

[00:22:26]Let patience letting go of judgments from your practice.

[00:22:40]Just sitting Breathe in.

[00:23:11]>> [clears throat] [snorts] >> Learning to be comfortable in stillness, in quiet, just sitting.

[00:26:56]Breathe in.

[00:28:56]And with the body still, rested and the speech quiet aware of all sounds.

[00:29:14]in the mind learning to settle.

[00:29:23]Know what it's like to just sit and breathe.

[00:29:33]Knowing with each breath there's nothing else to do.

[00:29:42]Nowhere else to go and no one else to be.

[00:29:55]Everything beautiful exactly as it is.

[00:30:00]sitting breathing.

[00:30:11]Once again taking three deep breaths slowly.

[00:31:12]>> [music and bell] [music and bell] >> as you slowly Open the eyes slowly beginning to move.

[00:31:51]And most important with the practice of meditation is to recognize how you feel now immediately after.

[00:32:05]Compare this to how you typically feel throughout your day.

[00:32:11]Recognize the difference if there is one.

[00:32:18]Ask yourselves how you'd prefer to feel every day for the rest of your life.

[00:32:27]And realize however you feel now. If it's quiet, calm and still or a busy mind, racing mind, whatever you're sitting with at this moment.

[00:32:37]It's not from anything I said. It's not from how we sit and hold the hands across the legs.

[00:32:44]It's not from the sounds around us or anything else for that matter.

[00:32:48]Has everything to do with your own mind and your own mind's reaction to an external situation.

[00:32:56]This is what the Buddha call Samupata means dependent origination.

[00:33:02]This is the basis of the Buddha's awakening.

[00:33:05]The word Buddha simply means awakened.

[00:33:08]He was a human being no different than any one of us who began to understand why he suffered, why he got angry, sad, depressed, stressed, anxious. He began to understand the cause of relationship of all phenomena.

[00:33:25]And what that means very simply for all of us, regardless of where you come from or what you believe in or where you think you're going, your whole life is filled with things that happen. You react. More stuff happens. More reactions. That's it. That's what we get.

[00:33:43]This practice is simply learning what it's like to respond to something quietly, peacefully, still.

[00:33:50]Because for most of us, the way you responded to the last 20 minutes is quite different.

[00:33:54]from how you respond to every other 20-minute period of your day.

[00:33:59]And so all we're working on is closing the gap to where the way you feel now is closer to how you feel all just as driven, motivated, productive, successful, whatever that means to you in your respective lives.

[00:34:13]But with a mind that's steady, clear, focused, distracted by nothing, disturbed by no one. This is not an easy practice. It's not necessarily fun. It's not an escape as often people think it is. It is direct perception into the present moment.

[00:34:34]And present moment is filled with conflict, chaos, difficulties, challenges. Again, duka.

[00:34:41]This practice is learning to be with life as it arises, not running from it.

[00:34:48]Meditation is free. Buddhist practice is free.

[00:34:52]It's just sitting, breathing, becoming aware of what you think, say, and do.

[00:34:58]The Buddha called this karma. Karma literally means action. Karma is not what goes around comes around. Karma is not people getting what they deserve or they're going to get what's coming to them. Karma is not what we get, it's what we give. We generate karma three ways: body, speech, and mind. So what we think, what we say, and what we do has an impact in our lives and the lives of those around us.

[00:35:20]So the very foundation of this practice is to become mindful and aware of our karma. Meaning mindful and aware of what we think, what we say and what we do.

[00:35:32]And again, how that impacts us and the life of those around us.

[00:35:37]The actions of others is important.

[00:35:40]Tiknadhan referred to it as engaged Buddhism. It is not ignoring what the world is doing around us. The world around us is a mess. It's always been a mess and it's going to be a mess for quite some time. But this practice is not changing what other people do.

[00:35:55]This practice is changing what we do and how that can then impact the world.

[00:36:01]So as you go out there and engage in the world and you fight to create change, you do it from a place of loving kindness and compassion, not from a place of hatred and anger.

[00:36:15]So with that, I'll pause. Uh for me, always really prefer to respond to questions, meditation, Buddhist practice, anything you're sitting with.

[00:36:23]Uh to those joining virtually, welcome.

[00:36:26]My apologies for not welcoming you at the beginning. Thank you for showing up.

[00:36:29]Um feel free. There's a chat box on your screen as you see. Uh say hello. If you have any questions, put them there and I'll do my best to respond. Uh so we use the rest of our brief time this evening for questions.

[00:36:48]>> [clears throat] >> Yes.

[00:37:02]>> Not so much a question as avation.

[00:37:09]Sorry.

[00:37:13]I thought these had so many thoughts about it and my family.

[00:37:29]I was struck by mythology and it alignment with astrology.

[00:37:40]and with a practice such as Buddhism and I've been further struck by stupidly reading many comments.

[00:37:57]people just wanted to find >> and thinking how many people >> Yeah.

[00:38:18]>> Yeah.

[00:38:20]Yeah. People will find fault with anything and everything, you know. And there's such a um you know this vast crazy universe that we're in. There's so much out there that is beyond what we can even comprehend.

[00:38:36]And yet you know we debate over what color shirt we should wear or who we think people should love.

[00:38:47]Just nonsense, you know.

[00:38:50]So, it's uh I think an important reminder always to begin to look at what are the things that we as individuals are really wrapped up in and what are we fighting over?

[00:39:02]What are we arguing for?

[00:39:04]And how many of the things that trigger us and piss us off all day long could we really set aside to leave time to leave time, space, and energy to fight for things that actually really matter as opposed to the potential little stuff that we get wrapped up in that is somewhat meaningless.

[00:39:28]And that's for each person. Yeah. Go ahead. How do you So I'm having [clears throat] >> relationship.

[00:39:40]>> Yeah.

[00:39:43]>> With people in what >> relationship.

[00:39:47]>> Okay.

[00:39:52]>> Yeah. So the question for those who didn't hear it uh virtually or anywhere was um you're having trouble with uh insecurity in relationships and and in your life and how to regulate that. Um so again brand new to Buddhism, right?

[00:40:09]Um it's important to understand first and foremost that you know the first thing pops into my mind is years ago a few years ago uh one of the college kids uh after meditation discussion uh he asked a question similar but a little bit different and he said I'm worried that when I speak I'm worried that people are judging me and I looked at him and I said dude you don't need to worry about that they are judging you.

[00:40:42]They are always judging you. They always have and they always will. The question is, which is really the question you're getting at, not just in maybe personal, you know, loving, intimate relationships, but friendships and, you know, workplace, school, whatever it might be. Um, how do we ultimately get to a place where other people's thoughts of us are meaningless?

[00:41:08]because they are. Now, I get it. People always pick it like, "Well, we need people to like us for our job." Yeah. I mean, if you go to an interview and the person hiring you doesn't like you, they're probably not going to hire you.

[00:41:18]So, yes, I understand there are situations where it helps to have somebody like you, you know, or accept you or embrace you, all those things.

[00:41:26]Yes. Um, but what I'm hearing in your question is just maybe you don't like yourself.

[00:41:34]I don't feel like I'm worthy of a lot of >> uh you say you don't feel like you're worthy a lot of it. Yeah. Are you in therapy? And I mean that very seriously.

[00:41:43]>> Yeah. My joke always is half the people here are in therapy, the other half are therapists and half of the therapists are in therapy. Right. So your question is very much therapy and since you are brand new and and for those who many of you have heard this but Buddhism and therapy are very different. Both very wonderful, both very helpful. Um, many people end up here because their therapist said, "Go to the meditator, go to Dharma Bum Temple." But they're very therapy is to break down all your trauma, all your past, all your history, and get at the core of like what's going on.

[00:42:17]Beautiful. Keep that path for those in it. Buddhist practice says, "I'm just here and I don't really give a [clears throat] what people because it's meaningless."

[00:42:31]They are just as ignorant and unenlightened as I am.

[00:42:35]I've had millions of thoughts about people over the years. Do you know how much that meant?

[00:42:39]Nothing.

[00:42:41]Do you know how much I actually knew about the person I was thinking good or bad things about?

[00:42:46]Not much.

[00:42:48]I might think I know them. When people get to know you, what's your name?

[00:42:52]>> Matthew.

[00:42:53]>> Matthew. When people get to know Matthew, do they really get to know you or do they just get to know the projection of you, the story of you, what you want them to see?

[00:43:03]Like, you ever go on a first date with somebody and sit down and just tell them all the miserable things about you [laughter] and like, I hope this works out well. No, you lie to them for two years and make them think you're great.

[00:43:14]And then two, maybe not lie, but and then two years in and they're all laughing with you, not at you, because they've all done it. That's why they're laughing, right? And then two years in all of a sudden they're like, "Wait, Matthew, what's this?" They're like, "Oh yeah, I really didn't want to tell you that about me. I wanted you to love me first." We just present.

[00:43:34]It's a facade, right? In Buddhism, I don't get too far into this, but the teaching is called nonself, right? Nonself doesn't mean we're not here. Doesn't mean we don't exist. It doesn't mean we're not real. We're here.

[00:43:46]We just exist completely differently from how we perceive ourselves. What happens is similar in a way to therapy but very different. We have a story about oursel. So Matthew has a story about yourself. And if I said tell you about, you know, tell me about you, you'd tell me what you want me to hear.

[00:44:02]And then you tell 10 other people a similar story unless it's wanting a different outcome. So you're just constantly changing the story about who you are.

[00:44:12]Is any of those who you really are? is that just some story you're telling because you have some outcome of wanting people to think something about you.

[00:44:21]You're actually the one who is creating the story for them to think about you.

[00:44:30]Just focus on your intention is my suggestion.

[00:44:35]Body, speech, mind, what we think, what we say, and what we do. Pour your heart, your effort, your love, your kindness, your compassion into everything you do.

[00:44:45]Honesty into everything you do. Family, friends, relationships, and then whatever people think about you, that's their mess, not mine.

[00:44:55]You know, um, does that help at all?

[00:44:59]>> Yeah.

[00:44:59]>> Yeah. Non-self. If you want to like Google and learn about something, again, it can be very confusing, potentially dangerous because it doesn't mean you're not here. You're like, "Oh, I'm not here. It doesn't matter." No. everything matters. Non-self is actually telling us that everything matters. That it's important to pay attention to everything and everyone. And that the thoughts we have about ourselves are just an illusion.

[00:45:19]They're not really who we are. They're the story we're telling.

[00:45:23]>> So, it's important to explore that.

[00:45:26]What else? Yeah, >> I know you said you didn't want to get too far into this, but on the concept of nonself, >> Yeah.

[00:45:31]>> I've been reading some Carl.

[00:45:33]>> Yeah. Yeah.

[00:45:33]>> And he talks about the shadow self where parts of yourself come back and they'll manifest themselves away.

[00:45:40]>> Yeah.

[00:45:41]>> And I was thinking about selfreization in Buddhism. How do we how do we integrate these parts of ourselves we don't like or won't acknowledge without identifying too much.

[00:45:51]>> So yeah. So the question on how do we uh in essence integrate the parts about ourselves that we don't like into our life. Um, everything you just said, right, from a psychology philosophy student to doing this stuff for a long time and still being a mess, everything you just said comes down to the fact that there are parts about you you don't like.

[00:46:17]That's the problem.

[00:46:19]It's exactly what I was talking about at the beginning.

[00:46:24]Whatever you're thinking about yourself that you don't like, that's not you.

[00:46:30]It's stuff you've done. It's thoughts you've had. It's people you've harmed.

[00:46:36]It's manipulations you've pulled off.

[00:46:40]That's not you.

[00:46:42]They matter. They're important. They've hurt people. They've hurt yourself. But that's not you.

[00:46:48]Those are aspects of a what the Buddha taught is the second noble truth. Greed, anger, and ignorance. The cause of our suffering.

[00:46:58]the three poisons which you've heard over and over and over again. But what you're really asking about is can I see my greed, craving, desire, right? My anger and my ignorance and love it because you have it. Why do you have it?

[00:47:17]Because the Buddhist said, "As soon as you're born, you are guaranteed to suffer." Number one, experience suffering. Doesn't mean all of life sucks. It just means you're going to experience suffering. pain, discomfort, angst, dissatisfaction, all those things. That's what he said. The second thing, which again come to your back to question is the Buddhist said, why do we suffer? We suffer because of our craving and desire and always wanting more and we're ignorant. So here is this enlightened person, some dude who taught some really wise stuff 2,500 years ago pointing out the fact that we as humans are what?

[00:47:51]>> Huh?

[00:47:51]>> Flawed.

[00:47:52]>> Flawed. Yeah, but forget no, we're not flawed.

[00:47:58]That's your view. Your view is that you're flawed. That there's something wrong with you.

[00:48:05]Welcome to Western religions. There's nothing wrong with you.

[00:48:10]You're a beautiful human being. Who experiences greed, anger, and ignorance?

[00:48:15]Is there anyone in this room who hasn't experienced greed and anger and ignorance? No. By definition of the Buddhist teachings, we're all going to experience it because one, if we are going to experience dooka, then the cause of that means that also is always going to exist. That's not a flaw.

[00:48:34]There's nothing wrong with you. This is where again these big contradictions even with therapy is like, well, you need to be fixed and here's your pills.

[00:48:42]This will fix you. If you're on medication, stay on medication. This is not a talk to leave your meds. Stay on your meds. But do you understand the difference? Here you have this. This is wrong with you. Here's your pill. This will fix you. Well, it might make you healthier, but you're not broken. You don't need fixing.

[00:49:01]You need to practice what overcomes greed, ignorance, which is generosity, compassion, and wisdom.

[00:49:09]So when you do generous things, how do you feel? Good.

[00:49:12]>> Do you feel flawed then?

[00:49:14]>> No. When you practice compassion and love towards yourself and the rare moments you do it towards yourself, which is very rare, and towards others, how do you feel? Do you feel flawed when you're practicing compassion? No.

[00:49:31]Wisdom?

[00:49:33]You got a little bit of it, right? When you practice that, how do you feel?

[00:49:37]Good. Any flaws? No. because you're practicing generosity, compassion, and wisdom, which is what the Buddha taught to overcome greed, anger, ignorance. I'm telling you that a lot of scholars, teachers will tell you that four noble truths, the Buddha taught thousand different ways for 45 years until he died.

[00:49:56]Do not complicate Buddhist practice.

[00:49:59]You are not flawed. You're human. And that means you're going to do a lot of stupid things.

[00:50:05]Do them less.

[00:50:08]Right? You've heard me say my answer people say well what is wisdom right it's not about what is the wisest thing according to the Buddha my qu you know the Buddha praised I believe it was Sabudi one of his disciples for giving a discourse on wisdom he asked him to sit down and talk about wisdom sits down and says absolutely nothing and after a period of time the Buddha comes up pats him on the back and says good job good job wisdom could not be spoken of so my way to translate that teaching into a modern day is let's look at the opposite of wisdom which is ignorance So do you know when you do stupid things? Usually do those less and by default you are practicing wisdom.

[00:50:48]Less ignorance is greater wisdom. Don't worry about what is the ultimate wisest thing to do. We will spend forever trying to figure that out.

[00:50:57]Practice generosity, compassion, and wisdom.

[00:51:02]and ultimately always including yourself, the love and compassion towards yourself and and and try to let go of this heavy heavy heavy conditioning that says you're flawed and you need to be fixed.

[00:51:18]So I don't try to, again, back to your original question, I don't try to marry the two. I don't try to say, okay, well, you know, I'm going to look at these great philosophers and make them make sense with Buddhism. They're two different things, two different people, two different sets of teachings. I would always keep it separate. Both valuable, right? I'm not dismissing one or or saying the other is greater. They're all brilliant, but trying to like make them all like fit into some tiny little Buddhist box, it'll do what it's doing to you right now, which is confuse you.

[00:51:54]Yeah. What else? Yeah.

[00:51:57]>> What should you do if you break a precept?

[00:51:59]>> What should you do if you break a precept? To hell.

[00:52:04]Forget all that stuff about flawed, right? This is where you're really flawed. When you break the preo. Um, so let me uh back up briefly without turning it into a whole precept talk.

[00:52:16]But so so at the time of the Buddha for those who don't know uh for the monks and then the nuns and the original what was SA the community they had 227 or 311 precepts the place now it wasn't like the Buddha sat down and said here's a bunch of rules you all have to follow them when things happened in the SA in the community that were divisive that caused problems a precept was created um there's uh what's called the vaniah which is the code of conduct for the Buddhist teachings right I'm not a scholar I don't like to read a lot, but you can study the vaniah. You can look at the code of conduct. You can see why each precept was created, why it's there. There's like the major precepts, the minor precepts, things like that. If you get all like you want to get all heady into that, Vaniah. Um, and uh, it's in what's called the what's called the Trypitaka, the three baskets of of Buddhist teachings, which are the sutras, which are the teachings, means thread, the sustras, which are the commentaries, then the vanaya. Um, so the basic five precepts, which are typically what most people are maybe asking about, which is kind of irrelevant at this point in time, but the basic five precepts that the Buddha taught, again, I'm kind of walking through these quickly, is to refrain.

[00:53:25]Actually, before I get to that, let's look at what a precept is. Do you drive?

[00:53:30]Have you heard me do this example before?

[00:53:31]>> No.

[00:53:32]>> Okay, great. Do you drive?

[00:53:33]>> Yes.

[00:53:34]>> When you come to a red light, do you stop?

[00:53:37]>> Why?

[00:53:38]>> Because I don't want to get hit by another car. You don't want to get hit by another car. Very selfish of you.

[00:53:43][laughter] See, I know you well. We We cleaned up at Pride together, so now I can really pick on you. Um, what else could happen?

[00:53:52]>> Get a ticket.

[00:53:52]>> You can get a ticket.

[00:53:54]>> Nothing. Let me ask you this now. Do you have to stop at the red light?

[00:53:57]>> No. What could you do?

[00:54:00]>> You could run it. And what what happens?

[00:54:03]>> Depends. You could get away with it. You can get a ticket. Someone can get hurt.

[00:54:06]You can get hurt. Whatever, right? So ultimately, traffic lights to me are examples of precepts. They're there to do what? Keep us safe.

[00:54:18]They even have a yellow light with traffic lights that like warn you. You know, green, you're good to go. It's about to turn red. So, we are warning you, you're almost in danger. Precepts are not really always that way, right?

[00:54:30]So when we look at the basic five precepts to refrain from lying to refrain from killing or actually it's just harming to refrain from stealing or taking what's not yours to refrain from sexual misconduct to refrain from intoxicants these are the basic five that typically most people begin to look at right you take the precepts um if you want to you might go to some formal you know ritual practice at a Buddhist temple and like do a formal precept ceremony 2009 we did a dharma dharma It's now engaged Buddhist program but called Dharmab Bum Life back then and we did a precept ceremony towards the end and uh my dear friend love him to death Ken St. Pierre, our very first uh board president. Um we took precepts and uh the next like two days later he came in and shared that he'd already broken like all five precepts [laughter] and he said that he was at a doctor's office doing an anonymous medical form anonymous and he found himself lying on the anonymous form. Right? And the precepts to me for and I know this isn't your question. Your question is what do I do when I break it? But before we even get to that, in all likelihood, you're going to I don't like the word break, but you're going to do things that are kind of different from what the precepts teach realistically potentially the rest of your life to varying degrees.

[00:55:54]First and foremost, which I think is most important is anytime I talk about the precepts, is I challenge people to take and just see, wow, what if I actually go a day without lying or gossiping or slandering.

[00:56:15]I'll make it easy for you. I'll do it half a day. Right? The precepts are there to show us. Alex, who taught here for years, he would always say, "Don't take precepts because they're forced.

[00:56:26]Take precepts because you're at a place in your life where it makes sense and you're ready for them." That they shouldn't have to be forced upon you.

[00:56:34]They are things that should happen naturally from the cultivation of generosity, compassion and wisdom. So um they begin to the the cultivation of these things begin to translate into well if I cultivate if I cultivate endless loving kindness and compassion for all beings, how could I harm anyone?

[00:57:01]If I practice love and kindness and compassion for all beings, how could I harm anyone? If I practice love and kindness and compassion for all beings, how could I kill anything?

[00:57:13]If I am truly practicing that, which again, this is not your question, but I'm, you know, prepping you for the next precept that you break, you know, maybe next week. um is I think awareness and observation of the precepts is incredibly powerful and beautiful to see how these play out in our lives. Not to judge ourselves, not to think we're failures, not to think that we have like screwed up, not to think that we're going straight to Buddhist hell because we violate a precept, but to be proud of ourselves for recognizing like, wow, this thing matters to me now where maybe six months, a year, two years ago, you probably wouldn't be asking this question. It wouldn't have mattered. But now it matters. And I think that's beautiful. to your question.

[00:58:01]When you break a precept as you asked, acknowledge it, recognize it, apologize if appropriate and necessary or if appropriate. Um, and like, you know, if you harm someone and it's it's there's an opportunity to apologize to them and and they're open to it, then, you know, do so. If not, apologize to someone else. But genuinely apologize. you know, if you hurt someone that doesn't want to hear from you 12 years ago that just because you got all Buddhist, they're probably not, you know, waiting for your phone call, you know, gee, thanks.

[00:58:35]Right? So, apologize to someone if it's appropriate. If not, um, and then the third one is to to recognize what you did, to apologize, um, and to vow not to do it again, to take that vow internally again.

[00:58:51]I vow to do my best to cultivate the practice to undertake the precept of refraining from etc. And uh you know give yourself some grace and don't be so hard on yourself is my suggestion. Um yeah does that help?

[00:59:12]>> Yes.

[00:59:13]>> Yeah. Um what else? We do one more before we close.

[00:59:19]Um, yeah, I was gonna ask I don't have a specific question, but just expanding a little bit on >> kind of the idea of like everything matters and also nothing matters. Kind of like the duality of that and how that kind of plays out in our lives. And one thing I like that I'm not even sure where I heard it, but like somebody for example would wake up at the beginning of the day and just like all right, I'm going to do my best and then at the end of the day like whatever, you know, [laughter] but kind of that like it all matters as we do it.

[00:59:57]and also practicing that compassion of the radical acceptance and compassion even for ourselves like in the last example like >> I think that gets a little confusing >> for sure.

[01:00:13]>> Yeah. So I'll close with this thought.

[01:00:14]Um and even you know even for me to say everything matters and nothing matters the term nothing matters is is again is also a little bit dangerous for lack of better words. Um, you know, and I say it all the time, but I just in saying that when I say nothing matters, what I mean is that everything is completely different from what we think. Like we don't really know what's going on.

[01:00:36]And so I tend to apply this idea of nothing matters more to like just the daily things.

[01:00:44]You know, the the latte that didn't have enough pumps of whatever you wanted in it, right? the car that got in front of you on the freeway as if you are so important and how dare they get in front of you and they ruin the next hour of your day when we know nothing about them. Um the thing that happened 12 years ago that really isn't impacting our lives anymore, but we're still hung up on it. Um all the little things that trigger us throughout our day. When I say nothing matters, that's kind of what I'm talking about. uh everything matters means all of those things also matter because they impact us. So they're not meant to be ignored. Um I believe really when you look at and again to close with this thought Buddhist teachings on mindfulness really is to be aware of the thoughts, feelings, sensations that arise when these things trigger us. Can we be aware of them? and how they impact us. So even the things that I'm saying don't matter, like an example of not getting enough, you know, whatever in your latte. Well, yeah, in the grand scheme of life, that doesn't matter. But the fact that that actually pisses somebody off, you laugh, so maybe you, I don't know, but someone in the room, I'm sure, is pissed off that their latte wasn't made properly today. Ultimately, in the grand scheme of things, that has no bearing whatsoever. But in that moment, it is incredibly important because it did something to us. It triggered something.

[01:02:25]Not only that, when we feel that way, do we just stay quiet about it or do we let the person know who made our latte the wrong way and make sure to ruin their day also, right? So, very rarely do we feel and experience these things and just sit with them. Again, going back to what I started with, this is dooka. your life isn't over because your coffee was made the wrong way. But in that moment, it's really causing suffering, discomfort, and angst. Can we just say, "Wow, how grateful am I to even have coffee, you know?" So nothing matters and everything matters. That's kind of what it means to me. Yeah. So I'm going to close on that unless uh anyone has anything they must say.

[01:03:13]All right. All right, so we'll join palms. May any merit gained from this practice be transferred to all beings in all directions. May all beings be at peace. May all be free from suffering.

[01:03:38]All right. And I just want to say very quickly before Star comes up, door closing announcements. Um to everybody that I mean this whole last week with the Pride San Diego Pride Pride celebration. Um everybody that came out, prepared, helped make the Pride parade march happen. Um to everybody that made signs before that for the Pride Parade, everybody who marched, everybody who went to light up the St. Paul's Cathedral um where there were 500 people in a huge interfaith service all coming together um to kind of the middle of Pride Week to light up St. Paul's. Uh to everybody that showed up 7 a.m. bright and early to clean Baloa Park Monday morning after the festival. Um just thank you. What an incredible experience. Um if you've never marched in the Pride Parade, you have a whole year to think about it and work your way here. Um, but it was really just such a beautiful week to support the LGBTQ community. Um, which is a huge part of the Dharmabum Temple community. Um, and so I'm just really grateful to everybody who made that such a a special special experience. So, thank you all. Um, star.

[01:04:59]Hello [snorts] everyone. I'm tonight's host star. We opened the door of the temple 19 years ago to introduce Buddhist practice to those who show up.

[01:05:07]Those who meet are not nuns, monks, gurus, or teachers and are not looking for students. They're simply practitioners sharing their interpretation of the practice. Every night we have different classes led by different people from various Buddhist traditions. We have a recovery saga that meets several times a week for anyone with addiction. And our food redistribution program is every Thursday at 4:30 p.m.

[01:05:30]We have classes and programs every day and everything we offer here is always free. We have silent meditation Monday through Friday at 8:00 a.m. and 12:00 p.m. The full schedule is on our website and also posted in the entryway above the shoe rack. We have a lending library. If you see a book you like, feel free to borrow it, then bring it back whenever you are done with it.

[01:05:50]Please straighten your seat or cushion before you head out. A few people can stay to close and latch the windows.

[01:05:56]That would be helpful. Thank you for being here. We wish you well and hope to see you all again. And there's a little baby lizard running around here. If you want to refrain from killing, watch your steps as you exit.

[01:06:08]>> Thanks.

[01:06:09]>> Thanks, D.

[01:06:19][laughter] >> Thanks, brother. Good to see you. Nice hat. That's a sharp one, too.

[01:06:29]Hey, I got to run L, but thanks for