Being an introvert is a superpower!

Added: 2026-06-01

[00:00:00]I think a lot of people have a fear of being alone. I want to talk about that a little bit because I really think that my ability to reflect inward and be more of a loner and be more of an introvert has actually played a big part in me being able to fix my life, in me being able to kind of put things into perspective and to really be analytical about myself. And a lot of the things that I was doing wrong and a lot of the time that I spent alone was actually in a way therapeutic and in a way very valuable for me. I know that we live in a day and age now where more and more people are probably feeling lonely and feeling isolated. And I think some of my best times were when I was alone and isolated. And I know that sounds weird.

[00:00:48]It sounds not normal. Maybe my personality type allows for that. Maybe because I grew up and I was an only child and my mom wasn't really around. I didn't realize I was latch key until I look back now and realize that I was totally latch key. Me being able to be by myself for long periods of time is almost like a superpower. And I think that more people need to look at it that way rather than looking at it as this bad thing rather than looking at it as like, you know, you're a hermit, you're an introvert, you're a loner, you're a weirdo because you don't want to be around people. And I made a video a while back talking about like being an introvert and how that feels and how I kind of liked it and I preferred it. I feel that it has impacted my relationships a little bit. I know that my wife struggles now with me being the way that I am with my personality of like just not wanting to go out and not wanting to do things. So, I understand that there's a bit of unhealthiness to it or not being the best thing for you.

[00:02:00]But I feel that introverts or people who like to be alone often have to deal with extroverts who tell us that the way that we're living isn't right. I want to say like it's fine. Like I honestly feel like it's fine for me. I feel like it's a lot easier for me to not have to deal with people. It's a lot easier for me to spend time by myself and think about the things I want to do and think think about my goals and work on the things that I want to work on. And I say that I think some of the best times that I had for myself were when I was able to spend long periods of time by myself. And I do believe that now like I believe that I work better alone. I believe that I am able to focus more when I'm by myself. I believe that I am able to be more creative when I'm alone. And I believe that it's the way that I want to be. And I wanted to make this video because I feel that we should stop shaming people for wanting to be by themselves. And I also wanted to make this video to say that it's okay. It's okay if you are like me, if you're an introvert, if you're a loner and if you're someone who doesn't want to put themselves out there. At the same time, I want to play devil's advocate and talk about like there is value in having friendships and there is value in networking and there is value in making relationships with people who, you know, could be life partners, who could be business partners, who could just be friends. And I don't think that you want to be completely lonely all the time because we're human and humans are social creatures, right? We're social animals.

[00:03:42]We live in packs and we live in societies and we live in communities.

[00:03:46]And we should be able to at least be social when we need to. And we should also recognize that it's okay to have to be social sometimes, but it's also okay to be an introvert and lean into your personalities, right? Like many people who are introverts are able to kind of focus on things on their own time and do the things that they want to do because they don't have to be reliant on other people and they're able to work alone as where extroverts or people with more outgoing personalities who need to be around people need people in order for them to be creative. They need groups in order for them to be able to work. And I feel that if I had a different personality type, I don't think I could have spent all those hours that I spent learning how to code locked away in a room in front of my laptop. Hell, even now as I'm building different stuff and I'm working every day, I'm in front of this computer by myself. My wife and kids, they go out and they go do stuff.

[00:04:50]They hang out with friends here in KL where we're at and she's with the traveling groups and she's hanging out with different moms and different parents and different groups of people who are hanging out with their kids. I'm at home working and it's where I thrive.

[00:05:05]It's where I do my best work. It is my favorite place to be is to be alone. And don't get me wrong, I love spending time with my kids. I love spending time with my wife. I love that aspect of having a family, but I feel fine when I'm by myself. I'm also not someone who has a large circle of friends. When I was younger, even when I was as young as I can remember, I had small groups of friends. And at one point, my friend group got too big. I would kind of try to stay away from my friends. I know many people right now that would tell you how I was when I was younger and I was always locked away in my house in front of my TV or on a video game even when I was like 14 and 15 years old.

[00:05:55]Like that's what I did. That's who I was. And I never grew out of that. And I feel that at least back then because it was pre- internet and pre cell phones and preocial media, you know, there was more of a get out and play with your friends type thing. And I really didn't enjoy doing that that much. I would rather be home doing my own thing. And as I get older now, I realize that that's just kind of how I'm wired. And I guess I want to talk about this more as a I don't know, video diary entry where I'm kind of just maybe coping a little bit with my personality type and talking through how I feel about this now.

[00:06:39]Because as I get older and I'm almost 40 now, I think about like what are some of the things that shaped my personality and and shaped my life and what are some of the things that really helped me grow and develop? And I think about like man, you know, there's there's some key moments in my life. There's some core memories or some some stuff that really had a big impact on me, but I think about like what's the one consistent thing that I remember the most? And I was like, it was a lot of time spent alone, but at the same time, like I was okay being alone. If you're someone who's not okay being alone, then don't be alone and try to make friends. It's a skill. I know for a fact that you can work on that and get better at meeting people, get more comfortable with talking with people, and if you do feel lonely and feel like you've got no one, then go out and do that. But like me, my wife tries to make me friends. She tries to like be like, "You need a buddy. you need someone to hang out with. And I'm like, please, no. I'm good. I really, really would rather just not do that.

[00:07:40]And I'd rather spend more time by myself. Like, if you gave me the option between going to the gym by myself or going with a workout partner, I would choose to go by myself. If you gave me the option of working on something by myself or working on something with someone else, I would choose by myself.

[00:08:01]I would choose by myself almost every single time because it's just what I prefer. And those long periods of time when I've been locked in and isolated and focused on working on whatever I'm working on at the time have been some of the best times of my life. And it's weird. It might not sound normal to some people, but like I said when I opened up this video, I don't think it's normal.

[00:08:27]And it's okay to not be normal. Just be you. and start to focus on the things that you realize give you a competitive edge, give you an advantage somehow. If you thrive being alone and you're trying to learn how to code or you're trying to start a business and you're trying to start a YouTube channel or whatever, like do it alone, right? If you thrive with other people around, then find other people that are doing the thing you want to do. I often always tell people like, go network, go network, go network. The reality of it is is I hate networking. I do it if I have to. if I absolutely have to, I'll do it. But I don't prefer doing that. So maybe I should take my own advice or I should at least be more open about the fact that I don't like doing and I feel like I am open about that. But it's just an example. If you see that you work a certain way and you are better at something because of the way that your personality is, then lean into those strengths. And it and if it's being a loner and being an introvert and working on stuff by yourself, then then lean into that because you'd be surprised when you lean into your strengths how much they can help you advance in what you're trying to do. And I'm realizing that now as I'm like putting in crazy hours, working on the app that I'm working on right now and like trying to get ahead and build and build and build and build and realizing like how much I just really like being alone and how good it's been for me. And you know, some people will tell you that it's not it's not good for you, but I don't know.

[00:10:00]I feel like I really like it. So that's just me. And that's my introvert update.

[00:10:07]I guess maybe I should call it that, right? since uh I made a video talking about being an introvert a while back.

[00:10:12]But it's a it's all right. It's good to be an introvert. It's good to be a loner. And everybody says that like this making a YouTube thing and having a personality on camera is like proof that I'm not an introvert. Trust me, I would rather speak to a camera any day than I would actually speak to like a real person because the camera doesn't talk back and I can just rant and ramble and not have to, you know, deal with somebody else's point of the conversation. That's it. I'll see you next