“Change Everything Or Alcohol Will Swallow You Up”

Added: 2026-06-02

[00:00:02]Giving up the booze can be quite easy for a lot of people.

[00:00:06]The hard work starts after that.

[00:00:09]Because you've got to change your life completely.

[00:00:14]Because for years I drunk most of my adult life. And I started about about 14.

[00:00:21]And um you've got to change from needing that drink to make you feel relaxed, to take the stress away, as a reward.

[00:00:34]When you think about how many hours heavy drinker puts in dealing with drink, I thinking about drinking, going to the pub, being in the pub, more so in my case recovering took a long time.

[00:00:46]>> [clears throat] >> How much stress was involved to carry your life you had, trying to hide bank statements, trying to hide hide bank statements, hide bottles, trying to you know, mask your breath, chewing gum and um mouthwash is all this to carry on.

[00:01:01]Trying to go somewhere was a massive planning thing. You couldn't do anything spontaneously cuz you maybe couldn't drive.

[00:01:09]Well, all of these things have to change if you want to be sober for life.

[00:01:13]It's not easy.

[00:01:16]You can't change your personality, obviously.

[00:01:19]But I'll lose the habit.

[00:01:21]And the habit is very difficult to break.

[00:01:25]Because essentially you've had this parallel life going on. You've got your work, your family, then you've got the drinking life as well.

[00:01:34]And the drinking life has to suddenly stop.

[00:01:37]It's really difficult when somebody says to you, "You can't have a drink for the rest of your life."

[00:01:42]It's like, "Wow, panic. What am I going to do here? What am I going to do there?"

[00:01:45]Many years it's happened to me, and that's why I went sober off and on it.

[00:01:49]Um sober for a while, then back on it again because I thought, "Well, how am I going to cope? I can't I can't go to the first kid in there. Everything I can't go to Red Island.

[00:01:58]It's up London. I can't meet lads.

[00:02:00]So, what plans am I going to do when I finish later in the Western London?

[00:02:03]It'll be a really busy day. What should I do? I'm going to have a couple of coffee. I could offer you something to drink.

[00:02:08]A few pints after work.

[00:02:10]After early, sometimes even in the morning. After nights.

[00:02:14]What am I going to do on holiday? How can you sit all day on holiday?

[00:02:17]Have a drink.

[00:02:19]Even though people say to me, "Do you have one?"

[00:02:22]I never had one. We can't have one coming.

[00:02:25]So, your whole life starts to change.

[00:02:27]Really difficult. That's why not many people can do this.

[00:02:30]Very few people can stay off for life.

[00:02:33]They still have them. Even people had liver transplants have gone back on it.

[00:02:38]It's not uncommon that.

[00:02:39]I mean, I was gravely ill within 2019. I couldn't go back. I don't want to feel that ill again. I've learned that through being sober how ill I really was.

[00:02:49]And it was absolutely horrific.

[00:02:51]You know, you lose your weight, your muscle mass, and you become gray. You've got no You have no personality, really. You're a gray man, aren't you? You know, I mean, literally gray. When I went down to nine stone, where was I? I'd be filling up again with food in two and a half years in hospital. And what a carry-on that was. So, my life was busy when I was in London, but my life was also chaotic because of the booze. It would have been much smoother without the booze.

[00:03:16]Much smoother. I could have coped with life much better.

[00:03:19]Everyone's got stress. I've got stress in the morning. We all have stresses and worries and things. But as a sober person, I wish there were many, unfortunately, you can deal with those.

[00:03:30]And you'll get through life. And you'll wake up in the morning and think, "I'm really pleased to be alive." You'll have a happy persona.

[00:03:37]Most alcoholics, heavy drinkers, are pretty miserable people cuz they feel so rough. And if you use a phone, terrible.

[00:03:43]Getting up at 4:00 in the morning for early shift, awful.

[00:03:46]Um getting home from late, till midnight, and having a couple of hours on the couch with a couple of beers and TV and having to get up again half 10 next day. Always felt tired.

[00:03:59]A bit nauseous, a bit sick, a bit I didn't like myself. I didn't like anything in the end because the alcohol controlled me.

[00:04:09]And that's the most dangerous part of it when it controls you. A lot of people wouldn't deny this. They'll go out and just control me. I only go out a few times a week.

[00:04:15]It controls a lot of us. If you said that most people give up for a week, they couldn't.

[00:04:19]I know a lot of gray area drinkers here.

[00:04:21]So, it's a killer. It's as simple as that. And it's so you've got to have a bit of a plan of action before you decide to stop. And you have to have a hell of a reason to want to stop forever.

[00:04:30]Because pubs are everywhere. Our booze is everywhere, isn't it? It's all over the shops. It's in garages now and 24 hours in the filling station.

[00:04:38]And it's a massive part of life.

[00:04:41]And it has been my life since I was a teenager. [clears throat] Parents used to drink a little bit. Um but, you know, nothing nothing excessive. Just social drinking.

[00:04:50]Alcohol is everywhere. Sporting events, cuz we you know, we've talked about this before. So, the main thing is you've got to really you've got to really want this.

[00:04:58]You have to have a very, very strong reason to want it.

[00:05:01]And a desire to be sober.

[00:05:03]You can't just say, "Oh, I'm going to be sober for 2 weeks."

[00:05:06]You want to give up for life and really improve your life cuz it will improve.

[00:05:09]The longer you're sober, the more your life will improve. I guarantee it.

[00:05:13]I guarantee it because everything will repair.

[00:05:16]No matter what age you give up.

[00:05:18]Your body will fight for you.

[00:05:20]And that's the main thing to remember.

[00:05:22]And when your health is good, everything's good, isn't it?

[00:05:25]Cuz if you haven't got your health, well, I didn't have my health in 2019.

[00:05:27]Or probably a few years before that as well.

[00:05:30]I couldn't do anything.

[00:05:31]I couldn't go anywhere. I couldn't even get out of the flat in the end.

[00:05:34]Used to pad round the walls. I couldn't walk properly.

[00:05:38]I couldn't eat anything. I used to get in the morning and just sip Stella Artois to try and equalize myself and my mind and my body and physically I was physically dependent on it.

[00:05:49]And it really became so bad I couldn't go to the doctors for anything else. I'd try to get diazepam, couldn't get that, and I self-medicated with it for years.

[00:05:57]I'd been off the booze since 2012, 2014.

[00:06:02]I went back on it 2014. And within a few days of going back on it, I was completely hooked again. That's the danger with it. It's a really sneaky thing, alcohol.

[00:06:10]Creeps up on you.

[00:06:11]You know, I met somebody outside to have a drink.

[00:06:14]Cuz they don't know I was an alcoholic.

[00:06:15]I was frightened to tell them. When you worry about telling people, you shouldn't ever be like that. If you If you meet somebody, tell them you've got a problem. Just say I don't like drinking.

[00:06:24]They won't ask you 100 questions.

[00:06:26]Why? A B C D E F G and all that sort of thing. You've got to really be strong for yourself, and you've got to look after yourself.

[00:06:33]Cuz if you don't look after yourself, you can't look after anybody else, can you?

[00:06:37]It's a dreadful, dreadful illness. It kills far too many people every single day.

[00:06:41]Every 10 seconds somebody dies in the world of alcohol-related disease or um or incident or you've got all these things, heart attacks, liver disease, pancreatitis, cancers, all linked to alcohol. Social problems linked to alcohol, domestics, child abuse, all of that's linked to alcohol.

[00:06:56]Rape, sexual assaults, people having affairs, all linked to alcohol.

[00:07:01]I can't think of anything good that came of it. I used to think that it used to relax me a little bit.

[00:07:05]But I'm a big um fan of something I thought about the week which was I think we drunk to calm the mind. I think a lot of alcoholics have you drinking cuz they're very very well what you would think as and very sensitive people.

[00:07:21]And we tend to drink to stop the mind chatting.

[00:07:24]If that makes sense.

[00:07:25]And you've got to get to a point where you can actually relax without the without booze.

[00:07:29]Takes a bit of doing.

[00:07:31]It really does.

[00:07:32]Cuz that's the only thing I sort of miss from it really.

[00:07:35]Getting me to sleep. There's no way I could have even one now. I wouldn't want to risk it. I'm too far the other side.

[00:07:40]I'm into loving life sober now, and I couldn't risk it.

[00:07:44]I know I can't risk it for anything.

[00:07:47]So, you know, if you need any help, please get in touch. Watch the videos.

[00:07:50]There's a lot of videos in there.

[00:07:51]There's about 200,000 in there now. So, I've been doing this for a couple of years, and it's been a good idea to do this. I'm going to carry on cuz I know it's helping people.

[00:07:59]Because nobody understands what you're going through other than another alcoholic. It's as simple as that.

[00:08:04]Nobody will understand alcoholic withdrawal. Nobody understands why you can't just have one.

[00:08:10]I don't have a clue what the public is like. I haven't got a clue. And neither have most GPs, to be fair. And I've got a couple of friends who are doctors.

[00:08:15]They would admit that. You know. Only people who've been where you are will understand the situation.

[00:08:21]And I'll catch you all soon. Thank you.