The Mary Celeste, discovered in 1872, was a ship found abandoned at sea with no crew, yet the ship itself was undamaged with full provisions intact. The most likely explanation is that an ethanol vapor explosion from the ship's cargo of 1,700 barrels of crude alcohol frightened the crew into abandoning ship, as the flash fireball would have been instantaneous and left no fire damage. This case demonstrates how scientific investigation can resolve historical maritime mysteries that were once attributed to supernatural causes.
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Dive into the haunting mysteries of the high seas in tonight’s Monday Meltdown!Added:
Well, my tale [music] about a man on the pan walked into the room and everybody left real [music] soon.
Oh, what went wrong?
You had one job, you had one shot, and somehow, man, [music] you blew the line.
and K and [music] K. He tells a joke, the room goes quiet, cuts a mill, [music] starts a riot, says he's cool, says he's the best, but even his dog is unimpressed.
ENK, [music] one along the way. You talk so big, [music] you walk so small. The legend of the drunk party and K.
Ain't no key [music] to every [music] [music] to this day. Keep on trying. That's your charm. [music] A human.
And now it's time for a man who couldn't last 17 seconds with Ronda Rousey in the ring or in the bedroom either. A man whose wrestling nicknames have been Makea-Wish Waldo, the step stool jackass, and the pintsiz Macho Homo.
It's Ian K.
>> [music] >> You see, I I intentionally put five seconds of delay in there so you can scream at me and and call me >> all kinds of names before you show up on stage.
>> Um kind of like how I said that you gobble BBC for gas money.
>> Yes, you did.
>> But have you seen the gas prices? Oh my god.
>> Well, you're going to get a big beautiful bill. A big beautiful gas bill talks.
>> That's right. [laughter] Oh, so I texted Roland I think it's Sunday.
>> Met him Saturday and I said that uh Ian just texted me and said you were gay.
>> And then at the same time I texted Ian.
I said Roland just text me and said you were gay. Well, technically that was true because that Well, no it wasn't because I said Ian texted me and >> neither one of you fell for it.
>> No, I know. [laughter] >> Gee, what a surprise.
>> Why talks? Jeez.
>> Yeah. What do you mean?
>> What are you doing, >> huh? Who Who here is obsessed with uh people being gay? and flu.
>> Um, >> wonder.
>> I remember growing up watching [ __ ] wrestling and my favorite being the step stool jackass.
That was uh I mean cuz he had to get on three step stools and bounce.
>> Was that Was that actually a wrestller's name? The step stool jackass.
>> It was yours.
>> Oh, okay. I I thought I I thought >> I wasn't sure if you're making [ __ ] up again or just um being honest. I'm talking. I'm making [ __ ] up. [laughter] >> Should have known.
>> Should have known.
>> Should have known.
>> I like the the [ __ ] macho homo. I thought that was good.
[laughter] >> I put I put down a couple more.
>> Was this 40 years ago? Well, you know what? I am >> now in this instance.
>> I'm old enough that 40 years ago I was driving >> and chatting. It's big black [ __ ] That's what >> Fox [clears throat] likes.
>> The BBC.
The big black.
>> Why can't it be that?
>> Could be the big black Caucasian.
>> That's right.
>> The big bold [laughter] Caucasian.
>> Big bold.
>> No. No. We're not doing that. Nope.
>> What? [laughter] >> What do you say?
>> No, that is not the acronym. No.
>> He was never young. He was always born from a petri dish.
>> Yes.
Uh, was this 40 years ago?
>> See, in that picture, Sherry's looking at you like, "If you don't tell me the truth, I will end you." Her kids have seen that. That's the last look her kids saw before they died cuz they pissed her off. That's that look >> indeed. Hello. Happy Monday.
>> Comics was on the WWE.
[laughter] Uh, for once that's good. Robbie's throwing >> Yeah. When I when I show up at the >> CIA on Monday, Robbie, I'm looking through your emails.
>> Ah, all you're going to see is a bunch of furry stuff. It's fine.
>> Probably.
Probably.
>> Who'd have thought that the furries would be the most sane part of the Democratic party at this point?
>> Are they?
I mean, the Democratic Party is basically communist at this point, but >> Oh, Sherry smiling. Yes.
>> How many children do you have that live?
Sherry. [clears throat] >> Three out of five.
>> Well, hello Freddy.
>> Hey. Wow.
>> How are you, sir?
>> Owie.
I'm Coral Urban in the boys.
>> God, that was a heavy accent. He's from Australia. Or is he New Zealand?
>> Daddy's New Zealand.
New Zealand.
>> It was because um Lord of the Rings.
That's his first thing. That's why I know that.
>> Right.
>> Okay.
>> Well, I have to say this. Freddy's shirt beat him on the stream by five minutes.
>> That thing's loud.
>> Wow. [laughter] >> Dang.
>> It announced itself before Freddy even showed up.
>> Guess you should have played Monday Night Miami or whatever the hell that one was. They're going to launch this new uh >> that's part of why I wore this cuz Monday >> SpaceX thing tomorrow and it's going to >> if it launches it'll be three times as powerful as a Saturn 5 rocket in much less space. They've been able to maximize the amount of payload they've been able to take into orbit. When they get into orbit, there's two things they're going to be able to see. The Great [laughter] Wall of China and Freddy in that damn shirt.
>> Freddy. Freddy's shirt. Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> So, um >> I was like, where is this going? It's the Colton Trench with his shirt printed.
>> The Colton Trench. Um, >> took a while to get to something else.
>> Something happened over the weekend and >> I told you not to talk about it.
>> And it only lasted 17 seconds.
We're not talking about Freddy's love life. [laughter] >> Oh god.
Oh, >> Freddy selfgrati.
>> What's that?
>> Freddy selfg gratifying himself.
>> Maybe. I don't know.
>> Well, it was an armbar. There you go.
>> Yeah, it [laughter] was an arm bar. So, Ronda Rousey uh and Gina Krono got into the ring this weekend.
>> Um I I hope there was something that led up to it because [laughter] it only lasted 17 seconds. And the funny thing about it too is I I I love the logic behind it as Ronda Rousey's like I don't want to get punched in the face.
[laughter] So she immediately went in for the takedown and yeah >> well if it was a boxing match because Gina >> somebody uh I trust with MMA stuff said >> Gina's from a different era of MMA than Ronda Rousey.
>> So Gan is in the more um street fight era of MMA.
>> I mean I mean the whole thing with MMA it's it's mixed martial arts, right?
Which means is that you have traditional kicking and punching and then you have the um >> that came out of kickboxing. So >> there was a guy named Dale Apollo Cook.
And Roland, you may remember him if you were into kickboxing.
He was a when I was growing up in Tulsa, he was world champion for like 10 years in a row. And kickboxing was all, you know, a few um things you do with the arms, with the fists, but it was mostly kicking.
>> Well, kickboxing was really more for exercise than actual fighting style.
>> Um yeah. Well, okay. Get in the ring with one of them and u because you'd be easy to hit being so low to the ground, but that's different.
>> [clears throat] >> Well, I'm not saying it's not valid, but just that a lot of people who teach kickboxing is more >> kickboxing now, right? With the tao and all it's a little different.
>> Um um >> but it doesn't mean that it's it I mean it wasn't a valid form of fighting.
>> Oh, yeah. You get kicked in the face with something like that, you're going down.
>> Yeah.
>> But yeah, but MMA I I I wouldn't say it's just kickboxing. Obviously, it's more than >> No, no. I'm just saying so what we see of what it is today >> is not what it started out as. It came in with people with different styles, different stuff. There wasn't a um it's kind of like >> the style of fighting the Marines teach and Roland would know this is not any one kind of you know martial arts or fighting style.
>> It's going to kill you fighting style.
whatever it takes to win.
>> Fighting to win, right? And that's what MMA is.
>> It's morphed into fighting to win.
>> Well, and that's that's basically what, you know, commentator says, uh, kickboxing is great for point fighting, which is why it works in female MMA for so long. Yeah, >> exactly. That's a thing.
>> Yeah. I mean, and and and a lot of things, too. It's like, >> um, you know, being being in Kempo, right? We talk about other martial arts and we we generally call most other martial arts martial arts, right? Um, taekwondo, which is a valid form of of fighting, >> really has evolved into just being tournament fighting.
>> Same thing with with with karate, right?
And the funny thing about it is like >> back in back in like the early days of martial arts, like the when it was really kind of going mainstream back in the 70s, everything was labeled karate.
Most things that were probably being taught was taekwondo.
>> Yeah, because it was just all, you know, bastardized Americanization of what those things were. The Filipino fighting styles are some of the nastiest.
>> I was going I was going to say our nice and Khali are probably some of the best >> and pretty ser pretty serious stuff, too.
I've seen that in Thailand. And those guys, man.
>> Yeah. my old Kimpo instructor, he he he really likes >> uh Ki and Ares. And a lot of it is the principles between Kimo and those other forms of martial arts are very very similar except there's a lot more focus on like destructions and whatnot.
Destructions is basically like >> if someone is going to punch you, you redirect it into your elbow to break their hand, stuff like that. um which that is not present in >> no >> in Kempo, but he he actually grafted some uh some stuff in there which was pretty neat. And we we did the >> Filipino stick fighting too which is [ __ ] phenomenal.
>> Nasty. Yeah, it's very >> I had a friend of mine who was a Filipino mil military special forces um and I knew him in New York around the time of 911 we were there and he jokingly called it his Filipino chair fighting style [laughter] >> and I'm like that's funny and then he explained to us one day uh I don't know 6 months into the job we were out having lunch he goes what I mean is I'm going to take that wooden chair over there break it in half and kill you all with it that's what I mean. And I'm like, "Oh, okay. All right. Now you're serious." But um yeah, Robbie says that Gina was one of the first MMA fighters out there. So when you're just trying to build the sport, you're finding first woman. You're trying to find people. So you've taken, you know, she's a foundation of this.
>> And then you take someone like Ronda Rousey who has she was she the gold medalist?
>> I don't I don't know. But she's an Olympic Olympic judo. I don't remember if she won the gold. I know she got a medal.
>> She got a medal for for Olympic Jud. So >> yeah, Olympic.
>> She did stuff and and I I think it for me Ronda Rousey saying I didn't want to get hit in the face so I took her down early.
>> Yep.
>> That is her strategy going if I don't take her down and get her to submit quickly, she's going to beat the [ __ ] out of me.
>> That's Yeah. I thought it was the bronze, but I didn't want to say >> it was a bronze.
>> She got she got the bronze. But still, >> in that sport in the Olympics for women, there are a lot there's a lot of competition.
>> So, for her to get bronze in that is a very big deal.
>> Well, and and the funny thing about it, you you have people, they're like, oh, you kind of like cheering that Gina lost because, you know, they're Gina haters and whatnot. And at the end of the day, um, >> she lost 100 pounds.
>> She lost 100 pounds and got a million.
>> She's the winner. She's the winner just from that. I don't care how the fight went. I mean, she was headed towards a bad end. I didn't even realize. I mean, when I saw her in the first couple >> I didn't realize she had Mandalorian.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. the first couple of seasons of The Mandalorian, I kind of looked at her and I went, "Well, you put even with the armor and everything, I'm like, Gina, you put on a little weight here, you know?" Um, >> but come on, 240. That's bigger than me.
And not by a little. And then that's a that's a woman. I think she's what, 5'7 and I'm 6'1.
>> I don't know how I don't know how tall she is. I've never >> muscle turns to fat really quick. Yeah.
>> And you see her in some of those other things when she was in with Ma Michael Fast Bender in that one movie. Kind of slips my mind.
>> Um she was so good in that.
>> Which one?
>> Haywired.
>> Haywired. Yeah. Yeah.
>> And then in the Fast Bender, was I I thought it was uh Euan McGregor.
>> Was it you and McGregor?
>> Yeah, I think it was Euan.
>> Those guys all >> That's where that was my introduction to as a >> Those colonizers all look the same after a while.
>> Yep. There you go.
>> But yeah, I I liked it. That was my introduction to Gina. I thought I thought it was a great movie.
>> And um yeah, it was kind of it was interesting, you know, very interesting.
>> And the fact that she lost all this weight, she got a million bucks. Rhonda gets 2 million. And I think Rhonda was more active. So obviously >> I think she was doing >> she had a lot she had a lot more going for training wise. So I mean this honestly isn't shocking. Well, and people will scoff, but she was in the WWE for a while. You still have to train with that. And even though it's sports entertainment, everybody knows >> those are still very good athletes.
>> The moves >> that they do still require practice and coordination and all this stuff. So, she was still working out up until a couple of years ago. So, she had a lot less to go. She had a lot less rust. Gina hadn't been in a ring for 17 freaking years and it showed. And myself, I had the same opinion as Ryan.
>> It was the worst case scenario >> and I thought it was going to happen >> and I just didn't want I just didn't want to get in a fight because I knew a lot of people in our hemisphere were all for Gina and everything like that. You know, geeks and gamers, they all flew out there.
>> Some of those stories are actually funnier than the fight. I mean, Ryan, [ __ ] that happened to him and then Jeremy's I don't know how long it's been since Jeremy's got on a plane, but I think it's going to be a long time before he gets on a [ __ ] another one.
[laughter] >> You have a lot of turbulence problems.
>> No, it was smooth.
>> Turbulence problem. And it was in the restroom. [laughter] >> Nice. Oh. Oh, >> he had skyhigh.
>> He had he No, he had a heavy in front of him [laughter] and >> Oh, yeah. That that that's right.
>> [ __ ] she clear she might have cleared the entire plane [laughter] right before Jeremy had to go in there.
>> I'm sorry, dude. You just hold you [ __ ] go back to your seat. You hold your bladder, man.
And like I said, the [ __ ] that happened with Ryan, I just it [laughter] no wonder he does FML. I mean, God, man.
I was just like, wow.
>> Well, sometimes you just have to you just have to deal with it, man.
[laughter] >> He really had an above average, >> especially if you have to really piss on a flight, too, man.
>> Yeah. And Robbie's mentioning freaking Beardo [ __ ] steals Brett Cooper's seat at [laughter] the fight.
I mean, [ __ ] hell. That >> he he he saw I have a seat.
>> He thought it was like No, he had it he had a he saw an open seat.
>> It was turbulence problem.
>> It was a turbulence problem. Yes, it was. No, but he saw a better seat that was open and he just thought, you know, you're at a Yeah.
You know, the turns out to be Brent Cook already. Yeah. And I think it had already like started because there was like a huge undercard. I think this thing ran for like three hours.
>> I was gonna say I was hoping there was something else and nobody everyone just sat down over and it was like what the [ __ ] dude.
>> So Argentum flying into the hell hole of LA. So, back when I was doing the consulting, flying all over the place in the '9s at LAX, um, I smoked. Um, God, it was so nice.
[clears throat] Smoking was so good. You guys just don't know what it was meant to be able to have a cigarette and calm down from wanting to kill everybody.
God, that was great. But anyway, um the smoking rooms were outside by the planes. So you'd go out this door and the plane you could touch the nose of the plane >> while you were smoking.
>> Yeah. You go on the Mac. Yeah.
>> Oh jeez.
>> Well, and to make it worse for Ryan, he's talking. He's with Jay this morning and he's talking and Jay just decides, well, I'm just gonna rub some salt in this morning.
>> Weirdo only pawn in Game of Life.
>> Yeah.
>> And while all this bad shit's happening to Ryan, right before Jay's I guess like the day before or something like that, he gets a he gets a notification for airlines upgrade to first class for a hundred bucks.
So he upgrades to first class writing first Jay >> Jay does okay >> Jay Jay and they were talking about it on this morning and Jay just like just sticks the dagger in and twists it with that one because Ryan's just like talking about everything that [ __ ] went wrong on his fight. the kid barfing the his over his carry-on won't fit in the overhead. [ __ ] his regular luggage [ __ ] broke and he's having to drag it around from airport to airport and everything like that. I think somebody I think he went to some place before the fight and they got his order wrong. I mean, just [laughter] I mean, this is just >> there there must be this invisible sign that literally everybody can see but us that says God hates me over Ryan's head.
And literally everything [ __ ] goes wrong.
>> I mean, don't get me wrong, I think, you know, Ryan overplays this sometimes. Oh, he does a bit a bit dramatic about, but in this case, I'm like, [ __ ] man. I'm surprised you didn't get hit by a car or something, dude. That's about the only thing that didn't happen to your plane didn't fall out of the sky. I mean, he just I mean, that's the kind of thing where you just don't want to travel again anytime soon.
>> Oh, dude. There there's been times where I've had some shitty flights. Like my wife and I were going to go visit my brother for Christmas and we're we were flying out I think it was like the day before Christmas Eve and um we're we're driving to the airport.
Um I I I don't know if we actually made it to the airport, but our flight got cancelled. I'm like, "Okay, all right.
No big deal. Uh we'll we'll book it for for Christmas Eve early in the morning and we'll fly out to Portland and visit my brother. Um so we're in the car driving to the airport. My phone rings and it's American Airlines letting us know that our plane was cancelled >> the whole flight.
>> Yeah.
>> That was it. And I'm just at that point I'm like [ __ ] this noise.
>> We turn around, go home, and go back to sleep because it was early in the morning. I I I text my brother and I was like, "Dude, we're we're not gonna make it. It's just it's not in the [ __ ] cards, man." Um and and and that kind of sucked. So, yeah. And and at this point, I was having like a really bad string of luck with American Airlines. Uh because at that time I was doing a lot of traveling for work and they like literally every single [ __ ] flight something would happen either being like delayed on the tarmac for hours or you know some [ __ ] like that. Oh god. I remember this one time and the thing that sucked about it is I'd fly home on Friday.
I'd see my wife depending on where I was may for a little bit on Friday. Saturday and then I'd have to fly out again on Sunday. So I'd see my life for like a day, maybe a day and a half tops. And I mean, I was gone all the [ __ ] time. I I I did this [ __ ] for like a year and I was like, I'm switching jobs. I I cannot do this crap >> anymore. Uh >> it's about when you have a a family, a wife, you know, nobody else is home.
>> Mhm.
>> That [ __ ] ends quick.
>> Yeah.
A year is about all you can make as anything beyond that and you're just done. You think water miles and the vacations will take and you never take them.
>> Yeah, it sucks.
>> Oh, and what you just said reminded me on top of everything else when Ryan Ryan had bought his ticket in advance, somehow when he got to the airport and everything, he was actually on standby.
>> What? Holy [ __ ] >> I mean, That's like last minute [ __ ] dude.
You don't you don't [ __ ] >> I agree. I just, like I said, I was listening to this this morning. I'm just like, man, dude. Oh, what else what else could possibly go wrong? I mean, the worst thing that ever happened to me, and actually, it's probably the worst thing that ever happened to the airline, too. is I came back from the Gulf War and immediately I had to get on a plane and um I was flying all the way across country from California to Florida and I get stopped in Dallas and there's some weather condition that's going on in Orlando. They were having like freezing rain or some, but they're not they're not flying in. So, nobody's flying in.
So, my parents get put up at this nice place in Chicago and all [ __ ] like that.
I get nothing. I have to go buy my own hotel room for the night. So, and I call my parents and they're like, "Oh, well, the airlines put us up here." Yeah, they didn't do [ __ ] for me. So anyways, the following morning, get on the flight, get into Orlando and everything like that, and my luggage doesn't show up.
[clears throat] >> Well, one time go ahead. Let me know when you're done.
>> And I'm just at at that point, I'm ready to I'm somebody is going to pay and I'm just like, like I said, I've been 10 months in in freaking the Middle East. I've had enough. I have like zero tolerance and I am just braiding the airport personnel how to flipping, you know, explicit a whole bunch of gamer words. Beep beep beep. And you know, I told him, you got about five seconds to find my [ __ ] or we are going to have some serious problems. Anyways, so they tell me, >> Jesus Christ, >> to go look, they've got a whole bunch of unclaimed baggage.
>> Mhm.
>> And I'm like, what the hell is that going to do? My plane was stuck in freaking Dallas last night.
Don't ask me how this math happens. I go in there to look, just to humor them, and there's my luggage sitting there.
Somehow my luggage made it to Orlando when I couldn't.
>> Oh [laughter] god. Oh dude. Okay. I I remember the full story now with um >> what happened flying to to Portland for Christmas. So what ended up happening is that we uh the the original day what happened was is that one of the toilets was broken on the plane. Now mind you, we have a connection in Dallas to fly to Portland. So, it was just that was the only connection. And >> it's a 1-hour flight, so obviously it got delayed. I want to say maybe we had like an hour layover in in Dallas. So, you know, a little bit of delay, not too much of a big deal. Um, but yeah, so they had a broken toilet. All of our bags were already checked. So, our bags made it to Portland, but we didn't. And the next day, and that was like I want to say like it was like the last flight.
Um, well, at least the one leaving Dallas for Portland, which is why we had to reschedle for the next morning. And yeah, on the way to the airport, they're like, "You're your flight's been cancelled." I was [ __ ] pissed. Um, but there was um there was another time I I'm sure you're familiar with the Congress Hotel in Chicago, right? Talks.
>> Yes.
>> Okay. Uh, what what park is the Congress across the street from?
>> Millennium Park.
>> Yeah. Is Millennium Park. Is it is that like >> that where the giant bean is?
>> Yeah, I think so. Is that one like a dangerous park or is it all right?
>> It's okay. Yeah.
>> Okay.
>> It's it's it's the touristy park.
>> When I um I had to go I had to go to Chicago for work. Um they they put me up in the Congress and I get there and somehow my reservation got cancelled. [laughter] It's like nine o'clock at night. I'm like desperately trying to get a hold of our admin to so I could actually get a room and I was supposed to be in the non-smoking section one like the nicer parts of the of the hotel and yeah they didn't stick me in the smoking section that [ __ ] sucked cuz that hotel room stuck.
>> Yeah, if you're not looking for that and that's what you end up getting is a smoking room. Yeah, that's rough.
>> But the like the interior like the downstairs of the congress is [ __ ] beautiful but the hotel rooms suck.
You hear that? Congress Monday got your ass.
>> Yeah. Well, the funny thing about the Congress that that was uh where Al Capone kind of lived for a bit was in that hotel.
>> Oh, in that case.
>> Oh, you were you were down near the Field Museum, Soldier Field.
>> Mhm.
>> The aquarium, Art Institute. Okay. Yeah, that's Yeah.
>> So, yeah, I thought I thought that was >> close. Yeah. Sky Deck. You were close to all the big buildings. Yeah, you were right there. Anyway, enough of this. Oh, enough of this. We killed enough time talking about nonsense.
>> What's that?
>> Talking about nonsense.
>> Oh, you know, not related to topics.
It's It's fun stuff. Not nonsense.
>> We were talking about luggage laws and all that stuff. Yeah. So, I flew Continental back in the day before it got merged with United.
>> Before they bought United >> for Yeah. before they bought United and became United. Um, so I go brand new luggage. all stuff. I'm like, "Okay, I'm going to Houston. Tulsa to Houston. Two hours 15 minutes. I have never had good luck flying into Houston.
I will not fly into Houston anymore.
[ __ ] that place." So, I go down there, go to Houston, go to KMA for some entertainment, quote unquote entertainment, because they do things down in Texas and certain clubs they don't do anywhere else. And then, um, I'm flying back And my bag doesn't make it back. It's a direct flight, [ __ ] So they say, >> "What the [ __ ] dude?" [laughter] >> Okay.
And they tell me, "Oh, it it got put on a flight to Seattle, so it'll be back here for you >> at some point."
>> Cuz I was flying back down to Houston on Sunday. So I go back different bag you know cuz you always have two weeks worth of clothes because you know this stuff happen when you're traveling. So I go and get and they're I'm like well I'm expecting meet a bag here come back there. He said well your Mr. Flu your bag is in Japan [laughter] so from Houston to Seattle to Japan.
And I looked this lady square in the face, and this is back for all the electronic stuff. Everybody's in line.
And I looked at her and I said, "Do I get the frequent flyer miles for this?"
It broke her. And this black lady in the back just started dying laughing at that.
Fine. I'm not going to get the miles.
Whatever.
Come back the next week.
I for So down to Houston. I come back.
I'm starting to get out. They're like, "Oh, Mr. Flu, Mr. Flu, we got your bag." They know me at this point, right? So, I go, "This is one of those very expensive Samsonite bags."
And it's like the gorilla had beat the [ __ ] out of it. It was Harambe. It was duct taped, right? And all this. And I'm like, "Where did you have it in a wheel well when it went to Japan? I What's going on?
>> Did it fall off the plane from a >> I guess plane? We had to fish it out of the Pacific Ocean, whatever. And the same black lady in the back, and I can't remember her name, I'm sorry, African-American woman, fine Nubian woman, whatever I'm supposed to call >> whatever >> shea, >> my fellow indigenous person. So, um, [clears throat] exactly.
>> Aren't we all indigenous somewhere?
>> Eventually, we're all indigenous to Earth. So, >> right here, >> there's life everywhere. [ __ ] rolling.
And so, um, she comes up front and she hands me a voucher for 25,000 frequent flyer miles.
And she goes, "I'm so sorry. My company destroyed your bag. I There were clothes hanging out of it."
>> Okay.
>> I'm just Oh, yeah. I'm just glad I didn't have, you know, the devices.
>> Oh, god. Yeah. That was >> I had a better time than you did.
Yeah.
Talks, dude.
>> Yeah.
>> Crazy, dude.
>> Screw that place.
>> It's fair. I mean, she You have to be like working in customer service. My worst thing is like sometimes you have to be that person is like, "We [ __ ] up." Like, "Let's try to fix it." But so I appreciate that. That's >> We do that every night. Uh Mondays and Thursdays we sit here and apologize.
>> We [ __ ] up. We're going to try and fix it.
>> We [ __ ] up.
>> Yeah.
>> All right. Speaking of [ __ ] up, uh, roll the >> We're good at apologies.
>> Roll the wretched for $50. Uh, no challenge for the chat tonight. I promise that next one will be harder. We should have a nice variety of topics uh on tap uh for the night. So, I hope everyone tunes in. Can't wait to see the Mandalorian mango and uh Grock this Thursday. [ __ ] my life.
>> Yeah. Oh god. I'm I I I was when I was booking my ticket last week and I was just like, "How long is this movie?"
It's like, "This is a two-hour [ __ ] movie." It's like, "What the [ __ ] man?"
>> Yeah, it should be about 80 minutes.
>> 90. That's like I miss the 90s because of 90minute films. [laughter] >> Yeah, this has no business being two hours. I I was checking uh [sighs] the theaters again and the Thursday one at like 700 p.m. is getting close to being sold out, which is a regular film, but everything else is [ __ ] vacant. I mean, it it it still does not look good.
>> No, >> which I thought was kind of interesting.
Uh it it the um IMAX showings have been pretty [ __ ] populated, almost sold out. Um, but there's only two on Thursday and I didn't get a chance to check the later showing, but the one at like 6:15 was sold out. I don't know about the the 900 PM one. But yeah, it's it's going to be interesting. I I don't think it's going to make as money as much money people think it's going to make, but I could be wrong.
We'll see. Time will tell.
>> That [ __ ] is going to be dookie. That's what I'll say. Yeah, >> I saw what um uh Alan Ang and uh Frank Gore had said about it right out of theaters and they said the runtime with it's a movie made for kids and it was way too long.
>> It said it was four episodes of the Mandalorian put together is basically what it was. She's specific.
>> And there's a small part where the kids are really going to like the the Grou character and that that's what it's made for was for kids.
>> Except nobody's going to take any kids there because they've lost that audience.
>> They did say it was better than the trilogies.
So, >> well, I mean, that's that's a [ __ ] low bar, man. That is a [ __ ] low bar.
>> All right. TG Monster for $2 says, "Hi, everyone. Happy Monday. It's my Friday."
Well, good. Why don't you uh >> congratulations >> a couple days off?
>> Uh let's see. The Aang Medan myth is a cool ghost ship. I haven't heard that one. We talking ghost ships.
>> Yeah, we we have a few ghost ships talking ships tonight.
uh the Mary Celeste, which is an interesting story, and obviously The Flying Dutchman, which is a bit of um more folklore, but it's actually kind of based on something. Uh Eric K for $2 says, "I want to see uh Sweating to the Oldies versus Jazzer size."
[laughter] >> Don't knock that sweating to the oldies, buddy.
>> Sweating while you're oldies >> every night. Uh mod Eric 17 years is a long time plus being out of shape. Ronda was doing, you know, WWE.
>> Yeah.
>> And still active. Um >> getting bumps and hits. Ronda wanted to finish fast like most of her fights. She stands, she loses. Yeah. And honestly, tactically, it makes a lot of sense.
>> And it goes back to what we're talking about with like the various fighting styles. I mean, you know, if you're a ground fighter, you don't want to be on your feet. You want to get the other person on the ground. Um, there there there was a a lot of jokes within Keno about ground fighting. It's like, yeah, I'm going to knock the person down the ground and then I'm going to jump on them. It's like, why would you do that?
You you walk away at that point if they're on the ground. You run, get out of the fight. Long stay in the fight, more likely going to get hurt. So, I totally buy what Rousey's doing.
[laughter] >> I don't [ __ ] blame her in the slightest. Uh, the dead man for9.99.
Excuse me.
>> Famous ghost ships is comic subject for Gary on FF while he's in Japan. No, I'm not. Um, if you ask me, he should. Uh, but nobody asked me. Nobody asked me either. It's fine. Also, FF is on Sunday. Yes, it is. Uh, but god forbid F&T should be cancelled. [laughter] I mean, >> yeah, that's gonna happen right around the corner. I mean, there's a lot of people that can run Infant. One of them is is ours. Uh WG gift to five memberships. Thank you, WG. That was kind of you, sir.
>> Very very nice of you, sir. Very nice.
Very nice. Uh S Raptor for $2. Send an email. Hope Talks likes tonight's ship.
>> Oh, made just for you, Tox.
>> It's the pro.
>> It's gonna be a penis, isn't it?
>> Hey, IT'S BLACK CANE. BLACK CANE for $5.
I flew space uh I flew space a for uh >> Space A.
>> Space A. Okay. Space A. All right. From Germany to Oklahoma once. It took eight flights. Uh one of which was an Air Force mail carrier. What?
>> Yeah. Flying military, baby.
>> Yeah. You're flying You're flying.
Is that a military thing? Yeah, it's a military thing where they just get you on whatever they can get you on and it's really cheap, but you have to you have to go where they tell you to go. So, you don't really get a choice in anything.
Like, you can get shoved on cargo planes and stuff like that.
>> Like, I flew I flew on a cargo plane for once for like 10 bucks >> back back in the day. So, you know, hey, I mean, >> it's not it's not the most comfortable thing in the world, but if you can't afford to pay airline prices and you're in the military, it's definitely the way to go. You can you can go a long way.
And the other thing is is you're probably going to have a lot more stops.
Like he said, you know, eight stops from, you know, from Germany back to the States.
Like the last thing I'd like to say about uh Razie and Ronda Rousey and uh Gina was I was really pissed off at uh Cornet. I don't know if you guys saw what he basically called it a fix.
And ironically coming from someone who's in sports entertainment saying something was fixed.
Um yeah. And I don't I don't put anything into it. It was not a fixed fight. Gina did not take a diver.
>> Roll calling out. Cornette. Cornette was like a very famous WWE announcer. I don't think we have a WWE audience.
>> Oh, he was a man. He was a manager, too.
He was a manager for a long time.
>> Right. Sorry. Of course. Yeah. For a lot of like classic guys. So, yeah, he's someone who's been in wrestling for the context that you know to what you're saying, >> right?
That >> no worries. Yeah. I don't know if we have a wrestling audience. We've never talked when I'm here.
>> I know nothing about wrestling. I mean, I watched him when I was a kid, but that was >> He was huge. He was huge in uh >> You saw him when you were a kid then, for sure.
>> Um let's see. He was He was in everything. I think he was in He started out like in the South.
um [clears throat] maybe way back in NWA days, but he eventually made it to WWF.
Um he was famous for carrying around a tennis racket that he would use liberally when the ref wasn't looking to win matches. So, uh that but he he had a very long career, you know.
Um, so it was kind of it was kind of really shitty of him to, you know, throw shade at this.
>> Well, did didn't Rhonda also only lose like two fights in her entire career?
>> Yeah. Oh, yeah. Rhonda's crazy.
>> She was 13 and two coming in and the only reason she lost two of those fights is she fought two really good strikers and she tried to she tried to fight their fights.
>> Yeah. And she >> Well, I because I I I remember like, you know, it was like a big thing when she lost that that fight and it really kind of like damaged her um >> her psyche.
>> Yeah. Home homes really worked her over, but that was partly her fault. She thought she could be a striker [clears throat] and she should have just stuck to what she knew and I think it would have been a different fight. Um, so >> well I think >> probably knows what he's talking about >> when it comes to this stuff. And uh yeah, >> the white belt that should have never taken the fight. Oh, come on, Paulie.
>> Here's the thing. If it were a fix, it would have taken longer.
>> Like there's no world with with the fix was 16 seconds. There's because I I want to put out there that this means nothing to Gina Corano to me as a person and most of us cuz she's an actor now. So the the thing is Rhonda had to win for anything to really work for them. If if Gina won, it'd be so upsetting because you know at that point Gina beat Ronda who's again you guys don't watch it but she's been in WWE fighting the same style. you know, she it's pretend obviously, but she's still throwing those punches and [ __ ] right? Like in still she's got the physicality where Gina has been out for 17 years. I mean, >> yeah, >> I would I wouldn't say it's embarrassing, but it it the the the main thing what I've what I've heard is that when basically Ronda went in for the takedown, Gina was like kind of really caught off guard.
>> And that's and that's the rust. That's the rust also. I mean, that's the rust.
And like the >> I dude I I don't give a [ __ ] about the fight. I really don't. U Paulie I mean I I didn't watch it. And when people were bitching about it like that night I was like what the [ __ ] happened?
>> Yeah. I just learned about this in this stream.
>> So >> well and you know and also to like the the accuse that well how many you know if anybody was watching >> you from the channel for that man you're going >> dare you. She's my Anybody that was all I know is Paulie could have taken both chicks because he's done it before.
[laughter] >> That's what I heard.
>> I was I was going to make a joke about calling uh Paulie a [ __ ] ground fighter. I know you kick my ass. He's in way better shape than I am.
>> Where you are and kick your ass and fly back.
>> Oh, I know he can kick my ass, dude.
[ __ ] off.
>> The only person who can beat Paulie.
Well, the other thing too culture put I mean culture just unleas unleashes his nerve gas.
>> But the but the exact same thing applies is like the stuff that Paulie knows is like vastly different from the [ __ ] I know, right? I mean Kemp Kempo is is not uh it's a self-defense art. [laughter] >> I pay $500 to watch you two wrestle.
Well, the problem is that I mean what it would happen is he probably it probably be the exact same thing. He would probably shoot in. It's like I I know some defenses against someone shooting in. But you know I I dude I I haven't I haven't done Kempo in over a year. Dude, I am woefully out of shape. I'm woefully out of practice.
>> And you know who's out of shape? Me.
Because I would have taken that you can't handle somebody you know a few moves or somebody shooting in. I haven't had it said anything about that yet.
Freddy's dying. But gee, whis.
Last time Paulie shot in on me.
>> I got pink eye.
[laughter] >> Oh yeah.
>> He love you long time.
>> Holly buu for comics. Tuku.
>> Oh god. Hold on. I gotta go.
>> I like what Eric. No, all all I'm going to tell you is that we have lasted 53 minute minutes and 17 seconds longer than the fight.
>> Ah, there you go.
>> But, you know, it's the same thing like if you went and saw Tyson early on in his career, you were lucky if you were getting six minutes, >> dude. Yeah. I mean, he he had a [ __ ] entertain.
>> Yeah. I mean, he he was just going around and killing people. I mean, and and it was no joke. I mean, straightforward. Forget about anything, you know, and I'm just going to come and I'm going to knock you out. And if you're going to say that the the Rousey and Corano fight was fake, then you got to say that a lot of people were taking dives for Tyson at the same time because it's the same basic logic. And honestly, I think only one guy kind of took a dive and I don't think it was really uh I don't think it was on purpose. I just think he didn't want to get hit anymore.
And that was the Spinx fight >> um that lasted all of 91 seconds >> because Tyson didn't hit him the second time. At least he didn't hit him flush.
>> And Spinx went down again and then he didn't get up. And sorry, that blow was not hard enough to keep somebody down.
Spinx had just said, "I've had enough and I'm not going to get hit anymore by this guy. I'll take my $13 million and go home before this guy caves in my face." So, >> that doesn't necessarily mean it's fake, though. I mean, just >> Well, that's what Pauliey's saying wasn't fake. It's like it doesn't necessarily mean what Roland saying it makes it a fake fight.
>> Rousey went after somebody. Rousey went after somebody. Got her in an arm bar quickly like >> No, no, no. I think I think he's he's talking about the Spinx fight which what Roland was talking about. Yeah.
>> Oh yeah. I mean >> I I just think I don't think it was rigged. I just think Spinx just >> Or maybe he is talking about the the Rousey fight with Gina. I don't know.
>> Well, I'm saying that Cornet said that this this was a rigged this was a the Rousey fight was rigged and I don't think it was. And I'm just saying by comparison then you got to say a lot of Tyson's fights were rigged too because they didn't last very long. And like I said, the only one I felt that might have been a dive or sort of a dive >> Yeah, he he clarified >> was the uh was the Spinx one because um like I said, I I saw the second hit second time he got knocked down on replay like a million times and like it was a glancing blow. It shouldn't have never knocked him down. Now, a glancing blow on from Mike Tyson to me would put me in the hospital for years >> probably.
>> So, I mean you >> but not another profession.
>> You don't know the amount of punishment like Paulie's been doing this every day for a long time and I think Andy Masterson does same thing. the toughness that you're building up in your limbs and your shins and your forearms. It just the toughness in general of all the small muscles and things around there that you're building up. You just don't have anything comparable to that unless you're doing it every day like they are.
>> Mhm.
>> You just don't. So Paulie could come up and >> could lay me out very quickly in a short amount of time, >> even if I was trying, >> right? And um that's just the way it is. That's what he does. He has an affinity for it.
He's good at it. He knows what he's doing, right? And even uh you look like Joe Rogan was talking about that, how he's good at this stuff, but he says the the really good guys are they're just so far past him. Yeah. Well, I mean, he's older, too, right? I mean, you don't >> you don't you don't have the the strength and speed that you used to. I mean, that's >> No. Reaction time >> deteriorates. Everything Everything Everything goes to a trophy eventually, you know, you get old. Everybody gets old.
>> I don't know. You pop a few V and everything's fine.
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Sure talks. For one thing, >> Iron Morgan for $10 says, "A war broke out in my country when I was on when I was mid-flight to GFK, and when I landed, I had no country of origin and had to stay at the terminal for 20 years." Wait, that might have been [laughter] called the terminal.
>> Could have been.
Okay, that's good.
>> And this the transition. Ever see a ghost ship, Billy?
>> And there we go.
>> Yeah. All right. Um, I I I thought it'd be kind of I I've been thinking about ghost ships lately. I I actually I'm a big fan of ghost stories and especially when they're kind of like true. Um, so I was googling around. I was like, we'll talk about ghost ships, right? And the the the Mary Celeste popped in mind. And that is probably um next to uh the Flying Dutchman, probably one of the more famous ghost ship stories out there. Uh, which is true. Um, pretty [ __ ] pretty [ __ ] wild.
>> Uh, so let me >> So in this this context, we're not talking about ships that are haunted, right?
>> We're talking about ships that have been found or something like that that don't have anybody on them.
>> Yeah. Right. Well, and and the Flying Dutchman is actually, you know, a ghost story more so than anything else, but it is is they believe they know what it's based off of. And this is the thing like we're talking about when it comes to like mythology and and things being passed around through oral tradition and things kind of mutating and evolving. I I think that's basically the story of the Flying Dutchman and and we'll get into that. So, actually, [ __ ] I'm actually I'm sharing the wrong story. This is the Flying Dutchman one.
I want to go to the Mary Celeste one.
So, hang on a second, folks. Let me um find >> So, fun fact, I'm really into this stuff. I never talk about it on stream, but I have a channel with a couple hundred subs that I do like scary story [ __ ] like this cuz I love ghosts and aliens. Unlike Roland, I'm not Mr. Logic. So, >> loves to [ __ ] ghosts and aliens.
>> So, I had just made a short, no joke, like a few months ago about ghost.
>> Paulolly could have come on >> and I was getting into this.
>> Oh, that's too bad. Come on, Paulie.
>> No, no, it's it's my fault.
>> I wasn't paying attention.
>> But >> wait, you didn't send him a link?
[sighs and gasps] >> Wait, >> I didn't see DMs. Oh, Robbie did a meme.
>> Okay. Um, so the so the Mary Celeste um was a ghost ship. And by ghost ship, it means it it was a ship found at sea with nobody board. And >> nobody really knows what happened.
There's actually some good speculation which is probably the true story behind it. Uh but yeah, so it's it's kind of interesting because the the Mary Celeste even before it became the Mary Celeste had a very interesting story. So anyway, uh the fate of the captain and crew of the Mary Celeste remains one of the most endearing uh maritime mysteries in history. And on November 7th, 1872, the 282 ton um Brigendine set sail from New York uh on its way to uh Ganoa, Italy. Hopefully I said that right. I probably did not because I'm not >> Genanoa.
>> Genoa.
>> Genanoa.
>> On board were the ship's captain Benjamin S. Briggs, his wife Sarah, their two uh a 2-year-old daughter Sophia, along with eight crew members.
Uh less than a month later, on December 5th, a passing British ship called the De Gratia spotted the Mary Celeste.
>> What's that?
>> That's mine and talks's birthday. Just that's funny.
>> Okay. Mhm.
>> Um, spot the Mary Celeste at full sail, a drift about 400 miles east of the Azors, which which are islands.
>> Yes. Uh, with no sign of the captain, his family, or the crew, aside from several feet of water um, in the hold and a missing lifeboat, the ship was undamaged and loaded with 6 months worth of food and water. Yeah. All all the cargo on board the ship was completely untouched.
>> Right. And they had enough pro provisions for 6 months.
>> Yes.
>> And there was the lifeboat was missing >> and they found him 500 miles off of that island.
Uh where and the last entering the log.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> Just real weird.
>> Yes. The Mary Celeste had a shadowy past. Originally christened the the basically Amazon. It was given a new name after a series of mishaps including sudden illnesses and deaths of its first captain and a collision with another ship in the English Channel. an investigation into whether the um to grant payment uh by its insurers to the Dante's crew for salvage of the ghost ship found uh no evidence of foul play.
So the Mary Celeste would sail under a different owner for 12 years before the captain deliberately ran into ground and attempted insurance fraud. Um that that's the thing I I find so funny is that it it's much like that hotel we're talking about. um you know, it had a very kind of like weird past. Nowhere near as dark.
>> Um as the hotel.
>> Uh but yeah, this is kind of kind of weird. Um so in a nutshell, uh as we we said that the ship itself was found, completely untouched. There was a lot of speculations. Was a pirates? No.
Um, and the answer more likely is mundane than anything else. And again, this took place in the 1800s, so people were pretty [ __ ] superstitious. Meanwhile, um, one of the most famous maritime mysteries, um, endures. Um, why would an um, an experienced captain such as Briggs or his sailors abandon a perfectly sound ship? That's a very good question.
Theories over the years have ranged from mutiny to pirate attacks to assaults by giant octopus or sea monsters.
>> It was a giant [ __ ] It was a giant [ __ ] >> Uh well, others have been speculations that could be aliens. Rowan >> probably was probably was they are prevalent in the universe. Well, while more scientifically minded proposed an explosion caused by fumes from the one 1,700 barrels of crude alcohol in the ship's hold, and that is most likely what what caused it.
>> Um, >> yeah, there's actually a really really >> guys censor this. Oh, wait.
>> Roland is showing his true face.
[screaming] Oh my god, >> there he is. God.
>> God, his true face looks like Katie Perry's vagina.
>> Probably smells like it, too.
>> Well, at least you still don't have to worry about the mass [ __ ] her hair up.
>> God, that thing got it.
>> The suction coming off of his bald head with that thing is hilarious.
It >> was.
So, the speculation of what actually happened is that because they were selling out of New York uh and it was much cooler because they had all this alcohol and one of the um I think it was like three of the barrels were actually found empty. They believe what happened is that the fumes from this alcohol was filling the hold and because it was in colder weather, it would not ignite as easily until they started getting into warmer weather. So, the speculation is that one of the um sailors lit up a pipe which basically caused a flash fireball to happen and everyone [ __ ] freaked out. Um or it could have been like a spark from like metal or something like that. But anyway, the speculation is that there was this massive fireball that happened in the ship. It freaked everybody out and that's why they got into the into the lifeboat and abandoned ship. And it's also a good possibility that they were not trying to get away from the ship uh it itself per se, but the ship may have gotten away from the lifeboat and that's the reason why it went off by itself. Um cuz Yeah. I mean it's interesting because people actually have gone and replicated this scenario.
>> Yeah. There's these guys at uh University of Manchester, right?
>> Right.
>> Yeah. One of one of the things that people kind of ruled out was saying, "Well, why wasn't anything charred?" And so what they did is they this guy set up there there was two experiments done.
One was uh I think the first one they mentioned Yeah. in um 2001 bestselling novel um Clive Kustler claimed to have found the wreck of the Mary Celeste, but oh yeah, that never mind. That that's >> he claimed to have found it. That turned out to be >> it turned out not to be the case, but there was a >> they did the wood test and the wood was still alive when the Mar Yeah, it was still alive during the time of the Mary Celeste. But >> what they did is they they used like these little mini paper crates and used butane and they kind of replicated it and it did not burn the little paper crates. So >> is a very good possibility that that's what happened. So the guys at the University of Manchester, the ethanol vapor explosion hypothesis, so that's what they tested.
>> Yes.
>> And the thing about an ethanol vapor fire is it's um a flash blast as you said.
>> Yes.
>> It does not leave any um um any trace that it happened of any kind of fire or anything. It's kind of like the flash paper that they use in magic tricks, >> right?
>> Mhm.
>> Same thing there. So they think that that happened and you're right, they they saw that they thought the whole ship was going to go up. They all got off onto a life raft and the life raft the boat got away from them cuz it was pretty big boat compared to the life raft.
>> Mhm.
>> And then they just got unlucky at sea.
>> Yeah. And they most likely probably died. [laughter] >> Right. I mean, because it doesn't take a whole lot in a lifeboat with that many people in it to dump that thing over.
So, >> did they say didn't they say there was like that the ship had water? It was like water logged or at least partially.
>> Well, it basically had water in the hole, which is >> right. But if you're not >> you have the BGE and if there's no one there to man the BGE pumps, you're not pumping the seawater out.
>> No, I I got that.
So there's like no possibility like well nobody's ever accounted for this like a flash storm or something maybe taking everyone by surprise and you know everybody was on deck and they all just got kind of swept out to sea. I mean, it it's a possibility, but I think that would have probably would have left some evidence that the ship damage.
>> Well, that's what I was asking about the water being in the hold.
>> Well, okay. So, one of the things too that happened is that in another article I was reading is that they basically had batten down the hatches because there was actually a storm. And what ended up happening when the fireball went off, it basically blew the hatches open.
>> So, I'm I'm pretty sure that they were all below deck when this happened.
And somebody legit probably [ __ ] >> lit up a lit up a pipe and caused the explosion to go off.
>> One of Cultzer's ancestors.
>> Yep.
Yep. But uh yeah, I mean it's just Yeah, it's it's kind of it's it's really funny. Uh just when you when you look into it, you're like, "Oh, wow. You're it's a ghost ship. What happened?" and you're like and you start digging deep and you're like well this actually does make sense of how it could happen.
>> Well, it it would be more interesting back then because I guarantee you they were like what the f you know when when they initially found because you know what is this like when did they start figuring this out? Like very recently right where they did the experiments. Yeah, I mean a lot of it too because obviously science has come a long way since the 1800s. You know, one of the big clues was the fact that, you know, it had all this ethanol alcohol in there and two of the of the barrels were empty, which means that it probably evaporated, >> right?
>> And you were going from so barrel making technology, we'll get into that in of the day was not precise. So, when you're going from colder temperature to the warmer temperatures, cuz these were they were going to um they were going south, weren't they?
>> No, they were going to Italy.
>> They were going to Italy, right?
>> Yeah.
>> So, so when when this happened, they were in warmer they were warmer temperatures. Yeah.
>> Yeah. So, it Yeah. That's where you get the leaks. This thing flashes out there.
They freak out.
>> Yeah. Get off. And uh it it was actually it was a blue flame from what they said.
>> Uh so that that's >> it's instantly there and gone.
>> Yeah.
>> Kind of thing.
>> It probably it probably [ __ ] freaked the [ __ ] out of the out of everyone on board and they had no idea if it was going to happen again, which it would have >> uh because it was the alcohol. Um >> and they probably had no [ __ ] clue that this was going what would happen.
They may have thought that maybe it was the wrath of God or something like that.
And so they got off the ship. Literally right. They probably thought it was like a fireball. That's what I'm thinking.
>> Well, I mean, they I'm pretty sure they [ __ ] saw it and it scared the [ __ ] out of them.
>> Uh maybe maybe some eyebrows got singed.
I have no [ __ ] clue. But >> yeah.
>> Well, I mean, in the end, here's something's mystery for a long time. We don't know exactly what happened because none of us were there, right? All the people that witnessed what was going on are dead.
>> Yes.
>> But >> but but this is this is very plausible though. Very plausible thing that they've been able to recreate.
Um, and as close as you can get to it, it turns out this is just a tragedy.
>> Yeah.
>> Somebody made a judgment call, a seasoned captain made a judgment call that got him and his crew and his family killed. That happens. And you have um the show Deadliest Catch that I used to watch all the time. I watch it every so often now. Um they call it deadliest catch is because that was the most one of the most dangerous jobs >> straits man that's [ __ ] rough.
>> They just people were just gone and uh they had that in the show. We're talking about that when you're battling the elements um especially the ocean. You just don't know what's out there. There's so much of the ocean we haven't explored. There's so many things. There was something here recently that made some discovery. some creature down in the air on his trench like this creature should not exist here.
>> His name is Roland. Please.
>> Well, >> indeed.
>> Roland's gone down a lot of trenches in his time.
>> That's what I heard.
>> Yeah, >> I know.
>> And they're all male trenches.
>> Yeah, there.
>> I got the rolling rolling button theme here.
>> Yeah. I don't do the last part because um it's unsatisfying like you are.
>> [laughter] >> Okay.
>> I leave the audience short like you do your wife. Oh god. Okay.
You know I give Gary short jokes all the or >> you give Gary finish. No nonfinishing jokes or finishing rate jokes all the time. So I guess that's karma. Soul assassin.
>> I'm not finishing a lot. Um, >> with men.
>> With men.
>> We do manly things.
>> No, I don't finish with men.
>> So, at that point, they didn't they didn't they no longer believed in that.
I get where you're going, but yeah, they did not at that point. 1870s. Yeah. They they stigma regarding women on ships had basically been gone at that. Well, I think I think a lot of that was kind of over exaggerated because obviously people came from the col came to the colonies in the 1700s and a lot of those were men, women, and children. So, >> you did have to have some women's, I'm sure.
>> Well, it wasn't so it wasn't >> it wasn't so much bad luck. It was just they were considered distractions and especially if you were not like a passenger vessel >> of some sorts, you know, it it having women on board. Yeah, there you go.
Exactly. So, >> I always thought it was pretty funny.
I'm trying to remember. Oh, it was Yellow Beard where they had Mishu a prostitute. It was basically Mish Pro.
>> Prostitute. Yep. Yellow beard.
>> Great [ __ ] movie.
>> That was a great movie. He's dead to Graham Jab and what a great comedian he was.
>> But >> shut up on your tits to the table.
>> We're never going to know, but it's pro it tragically people lost their life and um yeah, it's kind of like the Titanic.
There were so many theories and stuff flying around at the time the Titanic went down.
>> Yeah.
>> Uh the Edmond Fitzgerald.
>> They had Yeah, that's another one. The Edmond Fitzgerald >> ship just gone.
>> And was it Lake Michigan or was it Lake Erie that it Lake Superior.
>> Lake Superior. Okay.
>> Mhm.
>> And it took a song.
>> Yep.
>> Um Gordon Lightoot to uh to have enough people to out there. But there's also I mean the movie Perfect Storm, >> right?
>> They don't know what happened to those people.
>> They just piecing together things and made a movie based off of uh the radio >> guess contract train. That's not real.
>> No. That's so sad.
>> Perfect Storm. Perfect Storm is real.
Those events happened. How it happened with George Clooney and and >> was Mark Wahlberg just bobbing out in the ocean waiting for the sharks to bite his dick off. No, I don't know. But um >> but people do die out there in those storms.
>> Well, and a lot of it too is that there's such a mystery to the sea, right? And that's the reason why you have all the superstition and whatnot.
And >> you know, it's like again going back to the Flying Dutchman, >> uh, that that being just kind of like an an interesting tale. Um, but yeah, I mean, you >> you never know when a giant [ __ ] storm breaks out and it sinks your ship in the middle of nowhere and you lose all hands. I mean, that's just >> how it is, especially during that time period without transponders and and [ __ ] like that. Uh, it's just it's just very fascinating and it it's kind of creepy when you find a ship sailing at sea by itself. It's like, whoa, what the [ __ ] happened here?
>> It makes for great stories.
>> Isn't that crazy to think to find a whole ship at sea just empty? Like, that's um, honestly, I would love to be the guy to find that just cuz that'd be such a cool story. I'm sorry.
>> Well, it's like, you know, look at look at the whole thing with like the story of Ron Oak. I mean that that that's >> yeah what happened a very [ __ ] interesting story because >> they're the lumbies. I have a friend who's a lumbi. They're definitely the lumbies here in North Carolina.
>> Yeah. Well, I mean the predominant theory is that basically they melded with the natives, >> right? That's what the Lumbies are. So So sorry that's the name of the tribe that they believe that it became the Lumbies. Yeah. Sorry. I know that sounds like a joke. That's so I I just am a big proponent. Even the lumby like people have tales of like, yeah, this is where we kind of came from. So, and they're like half white Native Americans.
Interesting fact.
>> Yeah, we're all half white.
>> I love this kind of [ __ ] >> Thanks. Those damn comments. And for a for a long time you had all the mysteries with the Bermuda Triangle, you know, all the ships that were lost in there, the the lost squadron >> from 1940s, all all of that stuff, too.
You know, I think they've hashed a lot of that out at this point. But, you know, some of those ships, they just >> they just disappeared.
>> Well, and a lot of it, too. It's just that, you know, there are phenomena that happen that just may not have been known at the time. And and Parrot Head has a very important question. Are ghost ships creepier than male feminists? Nothing is creepier than a male >> feminist than a male feminist.
>> Yeah.
>> I don't know. Have you seen Camala Harris's stepdaughter?
>> That's creepy. I'm just saying if she were in a episode of Scooby-Doo, >> you know, you know those like >> her face would be ripped off to reveal the old man.
>> Okay. Yeah.
>> You know what she looks like when you guys were were basically putting my face on Sigourney Weaver. That's what she looks like. [laughter] >> That's what she looks like.
>> Take a look at some of those ones that Robbie did where he put me on Sigourney Weaver and then compare it to this chick.
I mean, it's >> No, she was in Scooby-Doo. The old man would be the mask and you'd rip the old man's mask off and she'd be underneath.
There you go. That would be the >> I knew it was the butthole. Oh, wait.
You [laughter] not Oh, wow.
>> Wow. All right, we're we're going to hit some chats and we're going to talk about the Flying Dutchman real quick.
>> Uh, hey, it's Joe >> 499. If you see the camera shot above the ring, the last shot Iron Mike gave Spinx um compressed his head into his spine. Oo, it was a stunner.
[laughter] Okay, I didn't for $10. I was on a cruise long ago and a high tension metal cable suddenly snapped and sliced everybody in half that was dancing on the main outside deck. Oops. That might have been the movie Ghost Ship.
>> Ghost Ship. Might have been >> might have been the Colia too. Could have been Disneyland.
>> Thinking that you were in those >> the dead band for 49. My question is do you all call them ghost pirates or pirate ghosts? Ghost pirates, of course.
>> I would think ghost pirates would be the proper terminology, but >> in that case, pirate ghosts is what I was saying.
[laughter] >> Well, Roland was always known as Butt Munch the Pirate. [clears throat] >> Yes.
>> Yeah. Back in the day.
>> Who told you that?
>> Yeah. [sighs] >> Well, what talks is not saying that he was Munch?
>> I was Munch. Oh, yeah. [laughter] Well, comics was Roland's fateful second in command. Uh, Rim job the peg legs pirate.
>> So, [laughter] >> come here, Rim job.
>> Quick impersonation talks. I'm floundering. Quick, quick.
>> Help me. I can't get my comeback to go in the happy. [laughter] If um if you were a James Bond villain, you would be Rim job. So, [laughter] >> see, that makes more sense.
>> That makes more sense. That's odd job.
>> Got him. You [ __ ] idiot.
>> Cuz I know we were going to talk about >> if was the sidekick. He would be hand job.
>> Hand job. That's [laughter] right.
>> I would hand solo.
>> We would Roland and I would be f you and f me.
>> Yes, you would.
>> And Ian Oh, well Roland would be, you know, I'm Robbie's fajger.
>> No, >> fajger. I'm your fer. WG says the last colony merged with the Croatan. Yeah, I thought the the tribe was the Croan because that's what they had carved on the tree >> very much. That's probably what happened. Um yeah, because Indian tribes I mean there [clears throat] weren't >> the reason that they had the whole game of skip stick ball was because war was too expensive for them. It it would they knew that it would kill out the civilization. So it's just whoever won the game.
>> Same thing with I count and coup as well.
>> They would kill certain people up to certain age, they would keep the rest of them. They would castrate the men and make them slaves and off you go, >> you know.
>> Yep.
>> So there's a real penalty for losing.
>> Yep. Um I'm assuming you mean what do you call a PDF file pirate?
>> So just to be clear, by the way, I I I haven't looked into this.
>> Oh, sorry. That >> me neither.
>> There was no punch line. Yeah. Um, I I uh Oh, here we go. Anything. Okay.
>> R Kelly, that's [ __ ] great.
>> Listen, I'm not going to say that The Flying Dutchman was aliens, but it was definitely Aliens.
>> Okay. Um, so let's talk about The Flying Dutchman. So, the um >> what you guys uh know from legend is that the Flying Dutchman uh allegedly was a cursed ship that would continue to sail the seas forever because the captain pissed somebody off. Either he cursed himself or God or the devil cursed him.
And of course we we saw the Flying Dutchman in the movie Pirates of the Caribbean 2 uh with um with Davy Jones, you know, being at the helm and everybody who got stuck on board uh basically kind of turned into some kind of like ghost monster.
And so that I mean I I I think that's a great example of using something like that from mythology and incorporating into a movie that that was very well done. Of course, you have two. You have Davy Jones or Davy Jones's locker, which I I completely forgotten what that story is about. And of course, there's the Flying Dutchman. Um, so why is it called The Flying Dutchman?
Okay. Um, I I'm going to I'm basically I just summarized the two stories of the Flying Dutchman. Obviously, the probably the most well-known tale came from the English uh which was obviously adapted from um you know the the original kind of like Dutch story about it. So this is more about the historical speculation of what the story was kind of based off of was this one ship. Okay. So, you know, pretty big during the time period was the Dutch East India Company. So, now um the last name is from the Dutch East uh sorry, former Dutch East India Company.
Uh Captain Do I need Oh, hang on. I need to go back over here. I need to start with this because this um Ban Fox is basically kind of where the story kind of comes from. Um so, they're they're talking about the previous like stories of it.
Okay. Another thing is that the VOCC the Dus sorry Dutch East India Company uh never had a a harbor in so that this is like one of the cities they they believe that it came from that the uh the Flying Dutchman came from this uh turn it's something in Dutch. Uh so it's impossible for the ship to have left that port. Um so it's more likely that the ship came from Amsterdam.
Uh so that is a lot more plausible and where it basically is the story of the captain named uh Willam Vander Dean. So that is the alleged captain of the Flying Dutchman.
And >> is that Captain Viller Hungen Floppin Dongan? Is that who that is?
>> Yes. Yes.
>> Other variations captain um >> basically give the captain other names besides William or Hearnick. Van Durkin Durka Derk Derker Durk Derk Durkan >> Ramount Vonam Vonam. Whoa, look at that.
And then uh Von Stratton. God, I [ __ ] hate these names. So anyway, what's going to come up here is that this uh Ban Fox is going to be the captain of the ship. So uh now the last name uh is from a former Dutch East India Company captain who actually existed, which is this guy right here. Uh, he was born around 1635 on the island of I'm not going to try and [ __ ] say that right there.
>> Tersling.
>> Tur tersling and started working uh for the VOC in 1656.
Um, in his ship's logs, the captain's log is found in the toilet. Uh he wrote about journeying with a small ship and crew from the Netherlands to Selian uh Norway basically nowadays uh Sri Lanka not not Norway I don't know why the [ __ ] I said that I'm [ __ ] okay in 16474 um they ended up shipwrecked near the Mal Davis or Mal Mal Mald Dives and floated put it around the sea for 22 days in a small boat. Wow, that's a long time. And they survived on coconuts.
God damn, that sucks. And finally reached um Kochi in India after 3 weeks.
U from there they traveled to uh I hate [ __ ] saying these words.
>> Bavaria.
>> Yeah. Badavaria which is nowadays Jakarta in Indonesia in July of 16.
>> That's where Dr. Doom rules, right?
Yes, Indonesia.
Uh, >> I was thinking Bavaria or whatever.
>> Bavaria, Batlavia, Bolavia, I don't know. In July 1674, they returned to the Netherlands.
Shortly after his return, U. Barton Fox asked um the border of the VOCC to build him a light ship where he could bring letters and documents to the Cape of Good Hope and the Dutch Indies. Um they agreed. Uh he has worked brilliantly for the VOCC for almost 20 years already. Um his first task is a new um in his new ship is to deliver confidential letters to the governor or general in um Bat Batavia.
Batavia, there we go. Uh he leaves the Netherlands uh the 3rd of November 1677 and arrives in April of 1678. So, basically, this ship that we're talking about now is going to be what is going to be referred to as the Flying Dutchman.
Okay. Everyone um is in shock that he sailed the entire area in 5 months time, where bigger ships usually take at least 8 to 12 months over the same journey.
And if you think the return journey would take him longer, then you're wrong. It only took him about 140 days or 40 four five months.
It's like 45 months. It's like what? No, four to five months. And he didn't even uh go straight away. He delivered letters uh in Selon and took a break for a week at the Cape of Good Hope. Besides that, uh Fox is an excellent navigator, very courageous, and has endless um experience. So after the trip he returned to whatever the [ __ ] this >> tellin >> tellin sells his house on the island and buys a house in Amsterdam. At the same time he got an important position uh at the VOC which is the the Dutch East Trading Company for those of you that are slipping in after we start talking about this where he became responsible for the construction and equipment of ships. uh but he still goes out to sea often and will sail for the VOCC until the end of his life.
Okay. Now remember uh where in the first part I mentioned how the flying Dutchman was increasingly fast ship. Okay. This is like other things in the the article talking about it. [snorts] Uh sometimes delivered old letters. So this is basically what they reason why they think that this is where the uh legend of the Flying Dutchman is based off of is because of these similarities between um this guy his ship and what he was doing.
Uh all right. So where was I? Okay. All right. Does it all Yeah. Does it start to ring a bell? I thought so. Uh for a long period there was no proof that the Flying Dutchman was based on um Fox.
That was until the historians discovered a new source. a piece of um a piece written by Vice Admiral um Jacobus Bolin who lived from 1791 to yeah 1876 after Fox already died and was buried in Amsterdam in the early 1700s. Uh Jacobus was called Jacob was a son of a VOC captain.
In travel reports, he writes about seeing ships in the night and it disappeared again in the morning. He also wrote that Fox is the reason for the story. He was a very courageous captain who sailed at fast speeds and across high waves as if they were they were nothing. Um, Jackabus also writes that the Dutch sailors uh was he exaggerate the story after that as they do because that's like one of the big things with like with any kind of tall tale be it the sailor, a minor, whatever. Obviously things kind of get exaggerated. Going back to the whole thing we were talking about with um oral tradition and telling stories when they get told over and over people embellish they add stuff to it and you know the story just kind of evolves.
Um so where are we talking about exaggeration blah blah blah I mean um what else are you going to do on a ship uh for so many months? Yeah, tell stories. Uh some stories say that folks wouldn't even uh wouldn't have been half a giant uh and a cursed pirate.
Then after some time, no one had heard anything from Fox and his crew. Some people assumed uh he cursed himself and his entire crew. Again, that's kind of going back to the whole thing with Blind Dutchman uh making them sail for eternity. So odds are he probably got taken out by a storm.
much like we were talking about earlier.
Jacus uh Dutch sailors uh then started sharing the tale with English sailors and before you know it, the flying Dutchman is there without Ban Fox perhaps because they couldn't pronounce his name. Who knows? So there you go. This is probably the story that the Flying Dutchman was based off of, which I think is is pretty interesting.
>> I mean, it's not real.
>> Well, I mean, what happened with this guy was real. Obviously, the Flying Dutchman is not real. And and and the other thing, too, where, you know, the article kind of gets into is that uh the reason why it was called the Flying Dutchman is that when things are further off, you kind of get a mirage effect, right? when it's very hot and you see water beginning to evaporate. It's like this like Have Have you guys like driven on the road and it's like so [ __ ] hot, you you kind of like see this haze?
>> Yes.
>> On the on the >> highway. You can you can see like the heat coming up from the uh asphalt.
Yeah.
>> Yes. It's the same idea here. And if you have a ship that's further off out um from where you're at, it kind of causes the same effect and it makes it look like the ship is flying.
So that that's where they get to the whole thing with the Flying Dutchman.
>> Um and on top of that, sailors tend to get drunk and see [ __ ] and Yeah. I mean, how many times have you guys gotten loaded and you misaw something? You thought something happened that >> never >> never happened.
Yeah.
>> Well, well, and we're probably past the time, but like during the 1600s and even in the early 1700s, a lot of times reason sailors and pirates consumed large quantities of alcohol is because there wasn't a lot of safe drinking water. So it was the uh it was the only thing liquid that was properly distilled that was fit for consumption. Yeah. There you >> have stores on board. So I mean but they also had >> rum, right? I mean >> yeah they they had grog or whatever whatever else. Like I said it it wasn't they make it out like sailors and pirates were just basically drunks. Well, there there was a there was a reason behind their consumption.
Now, did a lot of them consume too much of it? Well, yes.
>> Well, I I think a lot of it, too, is there's also boredom, right? I mean, when you're on when you're on a ship and nothing's going on and your only outlet is basically alcohol, you're you're probably going to get a little shitfaced at times. Maybe maybe not like massively shitfaced, but enough for you to kind see things cuz like the a lot of like the like the theories behind mermaids were like sea cows, right?
>> And you get a maybe you get a slightly shitfaced sailor and they see this thing in the water and they think it's a woman, but it's most likely a sea cow.
There's, you know, the scary thing is there actually been stories of recorded stories of sailors trying to [ __ ] Seek House.
>> Oh, sure.
>> Yes.
>> Yeah, that's actually >> sirens and [ __ ] like that.
>> Doesn't know what >> the name Roland means.
>> No, it doesn't.
>> Okay. I just wondered. I'm just, you know, asking questions with a female human.
>> Mhm. You know, the interesting part I found in all that was his ability to uh sail the routes much faster than other vessels. I I'm I'm curious if they ever tried to figure out how he was able to do that. I mean, he was knocking several months off the average [clears throat] times. He was doing things in four, four and a half months. He He was probably taking risk that most ships probably wouldn't take >> and it probably to him.
>> Well, and he probably also may have found some Damn it. Um, he may have found some like uh currents or something that other people did not find that sped up sped up his ability to sail. So, like I said, I found I found that very interesting. And of course that plays into the legend as well, the Flying Dutchman being a very fast ship, you know, and him being able to >> Oh, yeah. And this is a very solid point. His ship's cargo was letters, not gold. Yeah. I mean, it wasn't like laden heavily. I'm sure that probably is a factor into it as well. Um, >> yeah, that in itself though wouldn't like cut four months off a trip. It might cut like some days, a few weeks, but we're talking like months here. You know, that that's just that's just remarkable. He obviously learned something about those routes that nobody else knew and he also wasn't sharing because he was obviously, you know, may that was his trade. Mhm.
>> You know, if he can get if he can get information from point A to point B faster than everybody else, well, then he's kind of cornered to market on the whole thing.
So, probably he found himself a functioning wormhole [laughter] >> and he found that by reverse engineering alien technology.
>> No, no, no. Read the name.
Exactly.
And um so that's it.
>> It was aliens.
>> I was not going to say it was gorrhea, but it was ganorrhea.
>> But it was ganorrhea.
>> It was gorrhea. Yes. I I'll accept that more. Thank you.
[sighs] >> Goria. I barely know her.
>> So Elay says talks told me the Flying Dutchman was in the Karma. IS THAT TRUE?
>> [laughter] >> I I BELIEVE THAT'S CALLED A Dutch rudder, but >> I have no [ __ ] clue.
>> Yes, the I can tell you the Havana omelette is not in the Karma Sutra.
>> But yeah, >> I don't even want to know what the [ __ ] Havana [laughter] >> Oh no, please let me coat inside of any place.
>> Blue waffle was enough for me. [ __ ] hell. [laughter] >> Oh yeah, we Have you not seen Goatsy?
>> Yeah. The disappearance of the goatsy blue waffles.
>> The another another horrible horrible one is the tub girl.
>> Horrible. Horrible.
>> It's absolutely horrible.
>> There was the what? One called >> Tub Girl. Tub girl.
>> Yeah.
>> Oh, >> don't Google that one, guys.
>> The SS Orang Median or Orang, however you want to spell it. O U R A N G M E D A N.
>> Orange Agoten.
>> Orangeen. What? We're talking about oranges tonight. So, everyone shut the up. By >> I wore my shirt for it.
>> By comics brand teabags.
When you get teabagged by comics, [laughter] you know >> teabag brand teabags.
>> Teabag tea. That's right.
>> A free tea bag with every bag of teas.
[laughter] We would sell tea tag brand tea bags.
That's just nuts. [laughter] >> Michael Nolles right now is asking that question himself.
>> I don't know if you you heard about how Michael Doles had Billy back on.
>> He did.
>> He didn't.
>> Oh no.
>> That's because she's [laughter] >> Oh my god.
>> Why? Oh, it's >> Oh, that must have been >> That was terrible. Terrible.
>> Terrible. Terrible.
>> Actually met Charles not too long ago.
>> Um Oh, no, wait. That's uh that's Jimmy Kimmel as Carl Malone. That's right. So this Aang median ship uh supposedly in 47 or 48 the ship was in the straight of Malaa Durkadistan but Malaka picking up a distress call. Uh all officers including captain are dead lying in chart room and bridge possibly whole crew dead. Then a final transmission, I die. When rescuers boarded the alleged, they allegedly found the entire crew dead with the expression of terror frozen on their faces.
>> What is this? What ship is this?
>> Arms outstretched as if warding something off. Uh the O ring gian me an I.
>> Orang Midan. Uh, it's um orcish for there's [ __ ] aliens out there rolling. Um, so before the ship could be towed, it caught fire and exploded. [laughter] >> What the [ __ ] >> Exactly. So they get on there only everybody's dead with this horrible look of terror, including the crew's dog, which was frozen uh mid snarl. So before this ship could be towed, it caught fire because you know you find an empty ship, >> you get salvage rights, baby.
>> Yeah.
>> And um international waters.
>> Um it caught fire and exploded. Some researchers suspect a cargo of nerve agents or other chemical weapons being smuggled illegally.
>> That would make the most sense. Yeah, that would make sense.
>> A lot more than aliens.
Yeah. Explains why there's uh both deaths and a lack of records.
>> Yep. Um >> yeah, back back to the Ed Edmond Fitzgerald. Um >> the big lake they call get you gummies.
What?
>> Yeah, >> that was um yeah, like talks mention it was Lake Superior.
And what it's been a while since I've looked into the Edmond Fister. What?
What [ __ ] happened to that ship?
>> It sank in a storm.
>> Sank in storm. Broken half sink in a storm.
>> Okay.
>> Yeah.
>> And basically it happened so quickly.
>> Yeah. It was it it got well the theory goes it probably got caught between some waves and basically it's a physics um equation >> because it was filled with u >> because yeah it was carry it was carrying a max load of iron ore and basically kind of it >> it got to a point where the yeah two waves kind of held up both and it kind of went No support in the middle. No support guys. Just go. Yeah, >> because it it just went it went down like almost like immediately by the >> That was 50 years ago last year.
>> Wow.
>> Yeah.
And had they had they either been a little bit behind or a little bit ahead, they might have >> been fine.
>> They might have made it. Yeah, they almost made it. I forget the uh there's this there's this place where they could have dropped anchor. It's like a It's like a cove on on the lake where they could have probably dropped anchor and rode out the storm. And of course, if they'd left port a little bit later, they probably could have, you know, avoided the storm completely, but they just ended up right in the middle of it. And these storms, they come on, Lake Superior is notorious for these storms that come on really fast and just basically almost out of nowhere. And that's what happened here. And like I said, they there was just no there was no chance. They just >> Yep.
>> Yeah. They they had reported they lost some hatch covers. So these ships are long ships and they have pellet ore in them >> and other things. And so they have these hatch covers that they pull up to to pour the ore in. And then they put them down and they h and they uh they uh tie those down and usually metal tongs come and and tie this stuff down. So there was a report that they were taking on water and lost a couple of those hatch covers in the storm.
That's pretty powerful to because those things are heavy.
>> Mhm.
>> Even if it broke loose, it still be pretty heavy. And then um uh they came back and said that they lost their radar and they were wanting a nearby ship to keep them on their radar because they're basically blind in the middle of a storm, >> right?
>> And Lake Superior is pretty big.
>> Um so >> after that [clears throat] there was some strange radio stuff that they heard on the radio. Um the captain whose name was Msurly was yelling, "Don't let anybody don't let nobody on the deck." So, you know, he was Yoda. Um, [laughter] then later, uh, he sent out a message saying they were holding their own and then it disappeared from the other ship's radar.
>> Yeah, I I vaguely remember that being like, yeah, they were talking about how they're holding their own and then it just disappeared after that. So they believe that in the seas with the water taken on with these hatch covers gone, it it suffered a structural failure because if you get turned the wrong way in the waves, you're not going to take a big ship like that and go at a wave. You're not going to climb up it and go around. You got to go toward at an angle.
>> So >> y >> um they got crossed up.
There was nothing underneath them but 30 40 feet of air and that was it. There was no water mass to counteract the mass >> war pellets >> and it cut it in half and down they went because with that much ore and no buoyancy that's hitting the bottom fast.
>> Yep.
>> That's what she said. [clears throat] says there was another ship that Fitz Fitz was in contact with throughout most of the event.
>> Sorry, I just jumped on me. Let me scroll down. Uh um throughout most of the event and then the Fitz disappeared if I remember right. The storm was early for what is usually seasonal shift in weather.
>> Yeah.
>> Yes. It was an it was an early storm for for the time of year. Um, usually the bad ones don't come to a little bit later on. This one came a little bit early, but like I said, that's the problem with Lake Superior is it's very unpredictable.
Um, and like I said, these storms just freaking come out of nowhere and >> you you have no you have no idea. It could be clear skies one moment and completely black the next and you're just you're just [ __ ] it, you know, you >> it's dangerous, but they have to do it.
That's the way they get the iron ore out of the upper peninsula is they have to go that way. So, they have to they have to use superior as a route, you know, just like >> especially car that much. Yeah.
>> So, you know, talking about is the Arthur M. Anderson that was the one that was in communication with it all night, >> right? Interesting. So, um, Brahma also says, "Also, the wreck is considered a graveyard legally, so very few, if any, dive to the wreck." Wrecks are allowed.
>> Yeah. It's also in a dangerous area. It It's not like it was the only ship or the first one to have sunk in like >> Yeah. And that's one thing that Bungalow Logic says that basically the floor of the Great Lakes are littered with shipwrecks.
>> There's more than 6,000 >> really in the Great Lakes. Yes.
>> Yeah. Like I said, this is no joke.
>> More um more ships and planes go missing over the Great Lakes than the Muno triangle.
>> Yeah.
>> Yeah. Especially ships.
>> Well, yeah. Why >> Obama?
>> I was going to say aliens.
>> So, >> Oh, no.
One of the things that [clears throat] has come out is that the the a naval architect whose design team worked on the Edund Fitzgerald's design basically came out and said after an expect inspection of the ship in November of 75, it was not seaorthy.
So, the ship should not have been out there.
>> And you know, they're designing ships and stuff without modern computers and simulations, all the stuff in the 50s and the 60s when these ships are built.
>> And how do you learn when a tragedy happens and you study it? Um, and that's basically what happened here. But yeah, there's there's a ton of of shipwrecks in uh the Great Lakes because that's The whole Eerie Canal system was created for horses to pull that ice and iron ore from those upper states in Canada down to New York to get, you know, out out to the rest of the world for trading. And it wasn't until they had reliable shipping that you could replace the Eerie Canal.
Um, and there was actually a uh place in Buffalo. You can go there now. Um, where a guy built these grain elevators to foster all the stuff with the Eerie Canal uh, and employed thousands of people.
And then literally after a decade, a little more than a decade, overnight he was out of business when they opened up the ports and they had ships and things they could uh move along in the Great Lakes that could survive. So there's a a lot of history up in that area around this stuff. So >> yep.
>> Yeah. And Brahma's right. The Gordon Lightoot song is what really helped with the fame >> of uh >> Well, yeah. It would just been another It would have just been another wreck >> if he hadn't written the song. It It definitely >> propped it.
>> I mean, it just goes to show you how [ __ ] brutal the sea is. [laughter] >> In this case, it's not the sea. It's It's a [ __ ] lake. But still, >> I mean, no joke. think of um there's so many wrecks of these uh ferry boats.
So you go in the Greek Isles and in that area uh and in Ireland uh you know you've got these islands and you've got people with these giant ferry boats with these huge bow um pieces that tilt so you can get cars and things on. And there was one I can't remember how long ago it was. They were beeb boopping along in the uh Mediterranean and the bow fell off.
[clears throat] So the bow that that raises up, she let cars off and all that stuff. It's and the ship going fast, you know, down it goes. And very few people were able to get off of that. I just, you know, the Andreadora that um cruise ship not too long ago that >> 50s I believe.
>> Yeah.
But yeah, there's there's just it's um it's a big mystery in >> the ocean.
>> And um they couple years ago found uh brick roads about 9,000 foot down near Hawaii.
So you just don't know what's down there, what you're going to find. So, >> is it actually brick roads or is it actually like what we saw in the was like the Bahamas. I think >> it's not the biminy thing. No, >> it's a man-made road structures.
[clears throat] >> Um, and they also found uh copies of Battlestar Galactica down there.
>> I mean, that that makes the most sense.
>> The original the original or the >> No, no, it's the 2000's one.
>> Oh, it's the 2000's one. Okay.
I mean, there's some [ __ ] crazy [ __ ] around Japan, too. I mean, because obviously with the ice age, I mean, it did pull a lot of water out.
>> Yeah.
>> Um, you know, it's like >> there's some giant lizard that's really pissed off at Japan.
>> Yeah.
>> Too. You got to >> No, because like when all the ice >> making movies about him.
>> Yeah. when when the sea level drops because a bunch of water basically ends up on land because that's essentially what happens. You know, the the um the continental shelf is basically different, right? And that's probably what because of um during this time period, people probably built stuff. It got wiped out uh when when when the ice melted causing the sea levels to rise.
So, yeah. Uh it's there's there's a lot of probably stuff that is lost of time because of that as a result.
>> Well, you know, and you just look at it.
Mother nature is still, you know, still wins no matter how far we advance in technology. I mean, just imagine, you still have all these problems nowadays. Just imagine what it was like a couple hundred years ago to be trying to sail across the ocean or sail to various places that imagine the risks with just wooden ships. I mean, we still have problems now and we the shipping technology is much greater and you know we still have tornadoes and typhoons and all sorts of [ __ ] you know, and no matter how techly advanced we get, these things still screw around with people.
>> Yeah. you know, and they're still deadly.
>> Our Jen wants to know if they found any warp slugs around there.
>> Yes.
>> [ __ ] time.
>> Yep. Um, but yeah.
>> Oh, yeah. That's And Bungalow Logic brings it up. Uh, Chicago has very long breakwater walls enclosing the coastal water just to absorb all that violent current pressure. Yeah. And that's like Michigan.
>> That's of Michigan. That isn't even superior. Although Michigan's pretty >> can be pretty violent at times, too.
>> It can be. It's pretty deep. Which one's the deepest?
>> I thought it was superior.
>> Oh, superior is the largest. I don't know if it's the deepest.
>> All right, let's let's ask the internet.
>> Yeah, let's ask which is the deepest.
>> The deepest thing is Roland's butthole.
>> [laughter] >> Lake Superior is the deepest.
>> Okay. It is the largest and the deepest.
I wasn't >> Superior is 1,332 ft deep.
>> Lake Michigan is 925. Lake Huron is 750 and Lake Ontario is 802.
>> What about Erie?
>> Erie is the shallowest at 483 feet.
>> Yeah, I figured that.
Interesting.
It's funny. He's like, "Ah, look at that." Lake onto >> Ontario.
>> Ontario.
It's like, "Ah, wow. I didn't realize that Toronto was on the lake."
>> Yep.
>> I don't pay attention to Canada all that much.
>> [ __ ] Canada. Of course you know that rule.
>> Blank. Blank Canada. Oh, I'm sorry.
Eerie is only about 210T deep, not 483. So, it's it's so technically Ian, if you were faced down in Eerie, Lake Erie, and got an erection at 210 ft, you would be 200 you would be one foot above the water. [laughter] >> [snorts] >> I guess that's a compliment. Am I Drew by proxy now? [laughter] I miss Drew in his mighty dong ofleness.
>> Yeah, [laughter] >> indeed.
>> And it just Yeah, >> for I'm looking at I'm looking at a map.
I was like, "Oh, yeah. There's Buffalo.
There's Niagara Falls. There's like on uh >> Hey, hey, look at these four retards reading the internet.
>> Yeah. [laughter] >> Look at us. Hey, look at the guy with a shirt. See the guy with a shirt? Yeah.
Look at that. Look at that. Look at the gay man in the Star Wars hat. Yeah, [laughter] that man is gay. Gay.
Disguises a flu.
>> He He's the the Star Wars guy is gay.
And you know why? Because his lips are chapped. Lips are chapped. So >> they're not chapped. Yeah, they are.
>> We can tell.
>> That's because >> he's got protein shakes he uses on them.
>> No, >> you can stop now. Talks.
>> What? [laughter] >> It's 11:00. I'm tired.
>> Look at Look at all these retards. Yes, >> indeed.
>> That's probably Look at Look at all >> Smith is a [laughter] Jeremy scared god. Oh no. Now I really feel insulted.
Why argentum? Why?
>> Wait, what?
>> Gay man in a Star Wars hat.
[laughter] >> Ah, that's funny.
>> That That was probably the crulest joke of the night.
>> Jeremy has an above average penis.
Roland has a below average penis.
Totally different.
>> I've seen it >> for $4.99.
I promised myself that I wouldn't send >> uh super chats uh to waste money that you wouldn't understand and I wouldn't find funny. Uh but here we are.
[laughter] >> Look at the [ __ ] Heychard.
>> Also, the dead man for 199. Great show tonight. The truth is out there.
>> Play the talks.
>> What's your rolling?
>> Never mind.
>> What? What's wrong with rolling? You missed the >> You missed the queue by like five [ __ ] minutes, dude.
>> That was not 5 minutes.
>> Yes, it was.
>> Okay, >> internet on on a stream. It was five minutes. 5 seconds is like five minutes, dude.
>> Oh, I wait. We got a super chat uh from the uh uh dead man. Great show tonight.
The truth is out there.
>> Well, you nailed that, dude. Perfect timing. You nailed it that time, Tom.
You nailed it.
>> Nailed it.
>> You did all the things, man. Flu. All the things.
>> That's right. There is no do try. Only do. There is no do, only trying. Okay.
Whatever that >> gentleman, you're forgiven, >> dude. Argent, that was great.
>> Kelly.
>> R. Kelly.
>> Kelly. Yes. R.
>> Yep.
>> Yes. I am on Gary time. I am. You know, the funny thing is I actually got an email from >> um Rumble today about how I should put my channel on Rumble.
>> Is on Rumble.
>> My channel is on Rumble.
>> Respond the guy with my I am on Rumble.
What's that?
>> Is that how you responded to it?
His >> dad is his avatar.
>> It's It's the It's the uh one of the account managers there. It's like, "Dude, I am honorable. I dual stream all the time.
>> Is that Roland's butt pirate hat? You know what? That's what I'm doing.
>> Have you taken the time to look up my channel on on Rumble to see if I was there first?
>> What a crazy thing for them to do. Yeah, >> probably just It was probably help.
>> No, they reach out to channels like that that I'm gonna I'm gonna email the guy back just like I am on Rebel, man.
>> What are they calling you?
[clears throat] >> What's that? He has to respond back.
Yeah, I've been on there for 10 years.
If your analytics were any [ __ ] good, you'd [snorts] know that.
>> I know. Promote my channel.
>> Please hire a developer. Not from the bay.
>> Yeah. The funny thing is I actually applied at Rumble to be a developer. I got turned down.
>> I can see you doing that.
>> But you weren't [ __ ] enough.
>> Clearly.
Oh man, these are these are funny. These are absolutely [ __ ] hilarious.
U we have the flu fighter, not to be confused with the Foo Fighters.
>> So Brahma says, "But are you doing a channel on Rumble or doing it from your user profile? They are different."
>> Brahma, you've known comics for how long? Are you going to ask that [ __ ] to try and figure that out?
>> No.
Uh, I want to say that uh I did something like that a while ago.
>> Go to channel.
It's all reuse content.
>> Well, there you go. Um, so toxic man flu.
There's the flu fighter.
>> There it is.
>> Aha.
I guess it was >> the great thing is I can just go as myself for Halloween. What?
>> Oh no.
>> You You can read that. [laughter] >> I can't read that [ __ ] >> E gasp. No. Get away from me. Toxic man flu is after me and I can't seem to get away. He's immortal and my force lightning is useless on him and his cat.
Vader seems to be always on another call. I thought getting a Roland would stop this talks, but no. Now I can't get any sleep as this Roland sign spelled Roland with a D. Roland sings non-stop and I can't get away from him. Maybe.
Where is Q when you want him?
>> That's a lot of one cloud.
>> That That really >> raptor. No D. [laughter] Please don't put a D on my name.
>> That hurt. Roland.
>> No. Roland is the headless Thompson gunner gunner, right? Norway's favorite son. Roland is the wretched and uses his gums to blow guys for cash. Totally different in how [laughter] all that >> which is totally different what toxic man flu does.
>> Why Why should this stop at this point?
This has been totally gay from start to finish.
>> [snorts] >> So why should it stop now?
>> No, >> I don't know what you're talking about.
The >> farters >> farters >> presents farters. So instead of lanterns, it's farters.
>> It's farters.
>> Like the ozampic work down. And >> yeah, >> culture looks very pale.
>> Well, I mean all all the weight that Tom lost went straight to >> to culture, right? Culture, dude.
>> Well, yeah.
So that's >> poor fella.
>> Very brown.
[clears throat] >> Very very brown. Um, so there's that.
Here we go. Uh, guy. Damn girl. Are you a Ford girl? [clears throat] No. Why guy? Cuz there's a new issue with you every [ __ ] day.
>> That's the way it works.
Uh, here's from lovely Belle and it's Mr. and Mrs. Flu in our 250th anniversary celebrating in our patchwork quilt.
>> This is exactly the opposite of what the United States is. It's a patchwork couch.
>> That's when is Belle being nice to anyone.
>> Belle's been nice to me for a long time.
Oh, look at Oh, coming soon. Young Ian and Grou into the void.
>> So, they're going to fly to Roland's [ __ ] [ __ ] off.
>> Oh, like the magic school bus episode.
>> Exactly. [laughter] If you help me and he crashed it into Roland's [ __ ] >> You don't crash anything in Roland's [ __ ] You can't touch the sides. All right. Um, like throwing a hot dog down a hallway. [laughter] >> Fox would know apparently.
>> Wow. The sharing tonight. Wow. What?
>> I don't know.
comics. Help me find my keys. We'll drive my semi out of his ass. All right.
>> Oh my god. [laughter] >> This is all [ __ ] We're in grade school and middle school. Folks, >> by my crazy [laughter] Robbie and I still say you belong in the ninth circle of hell.
[laughter] >> You know, it is well done. So well done.
>> No, it's not. [laughter] pop cup of popcorn.
>> Have some What would be even better is if this were a video and there was a little green wiggly thing that come out of the top of that popcorn. That would be funny.
>> Wait, but comics is right. Make Roland into Dobby next, please.
>> No, that's already been done.
>> Where have you been >> for the last couple?
>> Yeah, right. I think they should make uh Roland into Mr. Smei from Peter Pan.
[laughter] >> Mr. Shme from what?
>> Peter Paner.
>> Okay.
>> The little dumpy guy next to >> Oh, yeah. Mr. Shme. Okay.
>> Yeah. His hooks like Yeah. Left him for hooks. Yeah.
>> Do you want a Wonka? [laughter] >> Ah, that was good. That's actually good.
Yeah, >> that is pretty funny.
>> Uh, tough times we're living in. Even Gandalf the pimp is feeling it. Ex-pimp homeless and whoreless hash pimp lives matter. [laughter] >> Must beans didn't make enough money whoring on a corner.
>> Hey, and look at all those Ford chicks just waiting to have issues daily on you >> right there.
Ah, here we go. It's a Dallas Cowboy fan. I feel this one. And a Super Bowl win, please. Make a Wish Foundation.
Sir, I think you're confused about what we do here.
>> Very [laughter] true.
>> Not those >> cowboys suck.
This is funny. Smurf and turf. Today's special.
>> Garamlating the Smurfs.
>> Wow. He does look like Gar.
>> Pretty accurate. Gargaml.
>> I think that's a real guy, isn't it?
>> Could be.
>> They just He looked like him. I think they just Yeah, >> I'm pretty sure that's a but >> yeah, that's really good.
>> Au and um some kind of soda with lemon.
>> Probably tea.
>> I know for tea with >> But you are the teaag king, so you would know this. Oh, I should have poured all that money into tea just so I could call you the teaag king. [laughter] >> Son of a [ __ ] Nice try, toxic man flu.
[music] >> Indeed.
>> Meet the huo.
Hua mau. A massive Hawaiian banana that can grow up to 10 inches long and 4 in wide. H zip. [laughter] That's a giant banana.
Give it. I don't know. I'm not doing that.
>> Unrealistically large banana.
>> Drag racing. You're doing it wrong.
[laughter] >> May have participated in one of those in college. Uh, ladies, when's the last time a guy opened a car door for you?
>> Fishkuel Lassa says, "When I got arrested."
>> Nicely done.
>> Oh, you know, feminism basically killed uh, you know, chivalry. So, >> oh, Ellienette Paige >> Blood Sport >> next flight.
>> My My wife is like, "Why don't you open the door for me anymore?" She's I was like, "Cuz you told me not to."
>> Yeah, 100%. That's how that [ __ ] works.
>> Yeah.
>> Yo, Dexter Bank Club.
>> No, I never No, you said you can open the door myself. That's what she said.
And so I stopped opening doors for her.
>> Uh, open the door for me, you lady.
Dexter Morgan's Miami Slice key lime pie ice cream with a blood strawberry swirl and white and dark chocolate body parts.
>> I would eat this >> unironically make this. I would eat that.
>> Wow. That Freddy, >> everything [clears throat] about this >> screams you. I'm just saying.
>> Right.
>> It really does. With the shirt you're wearing now with this. Yes.
>> If any one of us is a Ted Bundy type, secretly it it is me. I'll take that.
[laughter] >> So, I was just talking to Mrs. Flu the other day about South Beach, Miami. Um, I love I like the colors and the night life and the scene and stuff of South Beach, which I think explains a whole hell of a lot. So, there you go.
[laughter] >> Fair enough.
>> It's not pretty, but um, release McCracken.
>> Um, dmer delight. Yeah, >> dmer delight is good.
>> Uh, yeah. Yeah, I find it to be too bony.
Nice.
>> I'm pretty sure this is DJ Cobra.
>> Bony and kind of gay. [laughter] >> Bony gay. What you did? What though?
>> Only kind of.
>> All right, here we go. Dave the light guy, formerly Mr. Hey, would you blow me?
[laughter] >> This fight could have been an email.
>> I love that.
>> That's harsh.
Yeah. Anytime the mainstream media starts talking about experts, this is exactly how I picture them looking, >> right?
>> Yeah. Beaker >> and evil Beaker the emo chick. Whatever.
>> Yeah. One.
>> Am I high or does the new Duncan mascot look like a walking butthole?
[clears throat] >> That's good.
>> That's appropriate.
>> Coneman the Barbarian. Ah, that's good.
I like good.
That is man. The soda jerk.
>> Yeah.
>> Talks like it because jerk is in the name.
>> Yes. Get in, Gina. We're going to rob Netflix of 3.5 million in 17 seconds.
[laughter] >> That was [ __ ] funny.
>> Imagine being Netflix cuz like you at least want one round for the advertisement, right? I mean, because now Netflix does ads.
>> Um, they got their money's worth on the undercard.
>> Yeah, they think anybody who knew what they were doing knew that this was probably going to go down this way, >> probably.
>> Um, let's see here. What do we got? Um, oh, Monday Mystery Meltdown Into the Unknown with Ian K. Oh, look at that.
[snorts] >> That's a actual picture of my butthole that he has right there.
And is that beer in a >> I think it's supposed to be champagne.
>> It looks like urine >> or apple juice.
>> And this is the SS about to >> Why are you pushing that it's urine?
Ian's kind of pushing that it's urine.
And >> it looks like urine, dude.
>> Okay, so it's urine. I guess you drink urine. You want to drink?
>> No, I don't. It just looks >> We were so nice.
>> Cuz he's it's sterile and he likes >> They're trying to help you out. Yeah, we we had his back and then he goes, "It's urine." [laughter] >> It looks like it.
>> You drink urine. All right, fair. Well, this is a real photo of you, so we were trying to help.
>> Oh, yeah. Totally real photo. Yeah.
>> Well, right. Sorry, they made you a little tall.
>> To totally not AI generally. That was No, >> absolutely not.
>> Actually, dude, dude, this is true. Or it's Kors.
>> Coors and piss. Look at >> exactly the same.
>> Probably is the same thing. The champagne of beer. It is the champagne of beers.
[laughter] >> Or is that Miller >> high life or whatever? I had >> Miller highlight Miller highlight.
Champagne beers I believe.
>> Champagne beers. Yep.
>> If you were a beer, Roland, you'd be a schlitz. Schlitz. [groaning] Um >> I think it's given away by the birds flying in different directions.
>> Know exactly.
>> Yeah. None of this. But the SS ass rammer is about to give him a new and those Mr. Rogers uh fold over velcro ties.
>> Oh no. The really funny thing is the only reason why he started using ass rammer is because I've been >> you keep texting it to me. [laughter] >> It's really violent. It it just I'm sitting there going, "Hey, how's it doing gay boy in the morning?" He's like, "Okay, ass rammer." And I'm like, "Whoa, dude. [laughter] Calm down." Ass rammer. I remember when I told you something about go eat a ass ramer sandwich or something like that.
>> You were talking about ass ramer. We were talking about you uh in the San Francisco gay pride parade and um your chaps and dangling around and doing your teaag show and you [snorts] said something um >> I saw him at my bar >> about food and then we got on a food thing and I said you like to suck down hot dogs or something and and you said something about me eating an ass rammer sandwich. So there you go.
>> An ass ram and cheese.
Yeah, it was something like that.
Thomas Massie. Oh, here we go. Breaking.
Thomas Massie found to have connection to far-right extremist group The Founding Fathers.
[laughter] >> That's pretty [ __ ] good, actually.
>> Yep.
>> That's funny. Come on, give him credit of his rocker.
>> Okay, sorry. That was a better That joke deserved more. I'm sorry. That was funny as [ __ ] >> Oh, well, I can give it more if you want.
>> No, you you you earned that one. That was good.
There it is.
[laughter] >> You should try being in a brainstorming session with him for one of our specials um we did a few years ago.
[laughter] >> The show is nothing. Yeah.
>> Oh god. Yeah. There's Yeah.
>> Good night, Mrs. Flu.
>> She's going to bed.
>> Good night, Mrs. Speeding kills bears.
>> Speeding does kill bears.
>> And that's a a baltini.
>> Okay.
>> That's Brahma.
>> Or is that >> 100% a real bull? No, that's Brahma. Is that >> I think No, I think that's Brahma.
>> I don't know. I think it's you because No, if it was an otter, it might be Brahma, but it's a bear, so it's probably you.
>> Okay. Well, Belle is >> I just made you the top. He was Whatever. I'll ask her in the morning or something. That would >> be nice. Oh no.
>> Oh no.
>> Who would have done this?
>> Oh, I don't know. Could it be Robbie?
>> I don't think step [laughter] stool jackass.
That is gold. That is absolutely gold.
>> [ __ ] hate my life.
>> This is actually how I met comics was at this match right after the match. I was a huge fan. Oh, that's just [laughter] >> You actually can't see Freddy because see this guy right here? Freddy's blowing it.
>> Yeah, [laughter] >> hand is covering my head.
>> Covering your head.
>> You see his other hand is Yeah. On the back of my head from there.
>> It's crazy, dude. Yeah.
>> It's nuts.
>> I was so excited. I started blowing a guy.
>> Whatever.
>> I blew like 10 guys that night.
>> This is what I get for showing my face on the [ __ ] internet. [laughter] >> Yes, it is. But I have to say the face that's that looks pretty good. So >> that is it does look like you Ian unfortunately.
>> Step stool jackass. That's um that's amazing.
>> Step stool jackass >> came up came up with that one on the fly too.
>> Mhm. Robbie's good at what he does.
Yeah. I'm just basking this a little bit.
>> [clears throat] >> So, so apparently this guy's made of confettia. Uh, his head blows up.
>> Uh, yeah.
>> Well, you know, Trump doesn't talk blows his load. It's It's confetti.
>> Is that what you call it? Me looking at the F my son got on his assignment that I did. [laughter] [laughter] >> Oh man, >> that's pretty funny.
>> That one seems personal. Yeah, >> I I actually now I bought one of these.
Um, let me introduce you to my friend. I don't give a fuckaurus.
>> I [clears throat] need one of those.
>> Yes. You know why?
>> That's what killed the dinosaurs there, buddy.
>> A meteor.
>> Here you go. So, what do you do for a living? I hunt and kill aliens. What?
Aliens don't exist? seen one.
>> No. You're [ __ ] welcome. [laughter] >> Yep.
>> Thank you for your service.
>> There you go.
>> Mhm.
>> He works for XCOM.
>> He does.
>> The government lying to you. Who cares?
You lying to the government. Yes. Elmo.
[ __ ] in prison.
>> Mhm.
>> Uh oh. Yeah. Then this one. What kids think monsters look like. What monsters actually look like.
>> Accurate. That's accurate.
>> And we're back to >> It's okay. You look just like him.
>> You'll do a good job. Really?
>> Okay. I feel better. Let's do this.
>> Look at >> a Look at that.
>> It's okay.
>> Yeah, that's good.
>> I love that time when Ian was bubbles.
[snorts] It's so good. Oh, yeah. That's it.
That's all that's out there, I think. I think that's it. Unless it's Oh, no.
>> The name Roland means croissant for possibly rolling lines. Which is it?
>> Uh, >> the priest bakery.
>> I think you should go online. In fact, I'll pay for it. go online for you to get one of those $50 seminary certificates or whatever you want me to take a course.
>> You can just go to Universal Life Church, listen to an audio audio recording and you're ordained. I mean, come on. I've done it.
>> I am ordained >> twice.
>> I would um I think Roland, you ought to do that and you ought to hire yourself out as an officient for weddings.
M >> we are here gathered together to celebrate the joining of this [ __ ] to this [ __ ] [clears throat] >> This [ __ ] Yeah, that's probably how I'd say it, too.
>> Well, it's a little bit more official now. [laughter] >> That's true.
>> That's true.
>> You know, if I did this and I told you people, the the memes would just Well, they're already flying. What am I talking about? So, >> well, we're getting four maybe five of those every two weeks. It's they're just flying off the shelves.
>> Yeah.
>> Y >> Universal Life Church.
Become an ordained minister.
Get or ordained online.
Officiate weddings.
Yeah.
>> How much does it cost?
>> Nothing. I mean, last I checked it was nothing. Become an ornate minister.
>> Yeah. You got to fill out the thing now.
Okay. Before you just listen to like an audio recording and put [clears throat] in your name and you're ordained.
[clears throat] >> That was it. Seriously, >> that's how I did it. I'm ordained for real. Yeah, I did it. Pay like 20 bucks, whatever.
>> Yep.
>> I am a pastor of the Church of the Ever Bouncing Bedspring.
>> Nice. Nice.
>> Mhm.
>> Which means he's a [ __ ] a man [ __ ] >> Yeah, there's a lot of guys that have been bouncing on off that bedspring.
>> Sure got a party mouth. [clears throat] >> What he doesn't tell you is it's the the um he's a member of the Universal Pillow Biter Church.
>> Yes. [laughter] >> Okay, that's pretty good.
>> I want the truth.
>> I can't handle the penis.
[laughter] >> No, it's me rolling.
>> Speaking of not being able to handle the penis, >> why would you do that? That's me.
Everyone, look me up if you want to look at my stuff. I'm Roland the Wretched now. I'm changing my channel name. If you think I'm kidding, I probably will do it just to [ __ ] with Roland. And I'm going to tag it in my channel. If you look up the name Roland the Wretched, I show up.
>> Well, the difference is that he's a Roland and you're a Roland.
>> Well, my father named me after him. So, his real name is Roland. He just hides it from the internet. I'm Roland thei.
My grandfather, his father was was a sea cow. Roland the first. He was named Roland because he was fat and he rolled around because, you know, he was a sea cow.
>> That's how you find his penis.
>> That I thought that was supposed to be a flower dick. I just realized I missed >> missed the missed a couple of things there.
>> Yeah. Uh rumble time. Um is that a >> Haggard song?
>> Haggard song.
>> Isn't that a country singer? Merl Haggard.
>> Like Merl. Okay.
>> I was thinking like Haggard from Hogwarts for some reason.
>> Yeah. Merl Hagard. That's right.
>> Very close personalities.
>> It's a [ __ ] thing. Yeah. For what I also adios. Um guys and Freddy.
>> Oh, thank you for othering [laughter] man. Thank good night.
>> Good [clears throat] thing I'm Roland with a D now. So I don't even respond by that name anymore.
>> Roland Jun.
>> Roland. Roland. Roland.
>> Yeah. But thank you very much. I appreciate it.
>> Your parents failed you.
[laughter] >> What?
>> Said my father. He's been determined to be my father. Look at our names.
>> I do not.
>> No, I do not claim you. I never will claim you. You are not of my loins.
>> To be honest, you both have the same level of gay.
>> True. Don't dead name him.
>> Yes. Don't dead name him. Yes. Mech Jay said rolling diver to verse Roland.
You're right. Let's make this a thing.
>> All right. So So last week I was listening to Benny Johnson and he had uh let's see Jeremy Corbel on. Not good Jeremy Jeremy Corbel on.
and Jeremy Corbel did a documentary called Sleeping Dog and it's about UAPs.
So, me being the [ __ ] that I am, I paid 15 bucks to watch this [ __ ] on YouTube and I did a review for it. So, all you people who make fun of me and alien [ __ ] please go watch my video.
It's the latest one I just posted a couple of days ago.
Uh, yeah. Let's just say I wasn't a fan of the documentary and I told Benny he owes me 15 [ __ ] bucks.
So, >> I'm sure he'll get right on that.
>> Yeah, I'm sure he will, too. So, um, >> still doing >> still doing videos. Still, uh, going to the Mandalorian Grou Thursday.
>> That's going to be fun. Oh, it's going to be a glorious disaster. I just think this is going to be a complete I can't believe they're saying it's going to make a hundred million over the four day. I just don't think this thing has a snowballs chance in hell. [snorts] But that's it. As always, Ian, thank you for having me on so I can feel even worse about myself thanks to the chat.
>> How is that possible? Oh, you're >> I >> I don't know, but you guys keep doing it every week to me. So, >> you're welcome.
>> I mean, >> thank you very much.
>> How do you think the rest of us feel?
[laughter] >> Yeah. I mean, gee, Whiz, we got you have you on the show.
>> Yeah, I know. You guys are stuck with me forever.
>> It's pretty bad. [cough and laughter] >> I have I'm gonna play this because I haven't played it in a long time.
Uh >> oh.
>> Oh.
I mean, it's it's true.
>> Anyway, uh yeah, that's back when Eevee Mucks [ __ ] the bed at him. The cat, you know, >> Only Fans. Prison orgies. Oh, good.
>> Prison orgies.
>> You do Only Fans.
You You're the one who's putting the damn ticker in here. I'm not programming this [ __ ] >> What?
>> What?
>> No, that's YouTube.
>> That's AI.
>> Yeah, YouTube does not do that.
>> No, that's just like an AI thing that happens.
>> Yeah, it's AI. It's AI man.
>> [ __ ] boomer.
>> Yeah, >> you don't think AI is powerful enough to write a few words, Dad. I'm sorry for him, guys. I didn't mean to invite him on and him cause trouble.
You know what? Alzheimer's patients like that need constant supervision. Freddy, what's wrong?
>> I try my best. I try my damnedest.
>> Well, maybe if you weren't spending so much money on fancy ass shirts done, >> man. That's pretty appropriate just cutting it off like that. Ian, >> I mean, they can still hear us.
[laughter] >> Yes.
>> That's proper. All right.
Um, thank you for everyone showing up tonight to this [ __ ] show.
>> This was definitely a [ __ ] show. Um, >> yes, >> nothing went terribly wrong. It was fun, but you're right.
>> I mean, it could have been worse. I mean, >> it's kind of like >> Mac praline ice cream. It's ice cream, so it's good, but it's >> right >> not at the same time. It's not like double dipped chocolate, >> which is one of Ian's teaag flavors.
[laughter] >> Coming to store soon.
>> That's right.
>> You know, the funny thing is that talks about one who knows.
>> Well, yeah, I come up with the flavors and Braum is right. The [ __ ] that I came up with that never made it to air is disgusting.
>> I couldn't [laughter] imagine.
>> Oh, some of the Christmas show the the Christmas songs I came up with.
>> I I >> Robbie, you're never going to see that.
>> Robbie, what you can do is you can come up with toxic man flu. Professional teabag stand.
>> The only way you're going to see that is if you do it in a meme. Okay. If he were to stand up and turn around, it looked like a frog standing up.
No ass. He'd been sitting at Yeah, he's a Marine. He has no ass.
>> I have an ass.
I'm offended by that.
>> You are an ass. That's different.
>> Then show it. [laughter] >> Well played, man. Flu. Well played.
>> There you go. Took me a while.
>> Mahalo Beachs. Yes. Oh, Mecca and Jay coming in hot with the Oh my.
>> Oh my.
>> Very appropriate for this show.
>> At least you're not hoing.
>> Well, you might be after this episode.
[sighs] >> Yeah, I am. After being on this podcast, I have no opportunities. [laughter] >> Night, Keely.
>> Oh, you can always get a night.
>> You can always get a job with the NSA like me and read Robbiey's emails. Yeah, [laughter] >> that's some sick [ __ ] How How's Hummeraspr >> surfa >> homosaparifa whom Sarifa >> Sarifa >> Okay, so that's an angel. Okay, got it.
>> Sarif.
Okay, >> Sarif. We're all >> How many retards does it take to pronounce a name?
>> All of them.
Yes, we are >> mainly rolling.
>> Night R Jerham.
>> Remember, go check out Rol into the Ratchet with a D.
[clears throat] >> Hey, good night Robbie has great memes tonight and SFS. That was me and a TIE fighter. Yes, >> it's the flu fighter.
>> Oh, the flu fighters. That's funny.
That's funny. You see that? Like >> you didn't get that.
>> Everybody was saying it. When was the last time that I introduced you as the flu fighter, not to be confused with the Foo Fighter?
>> Yes. I was not paying attention.
>> Clearly, >> as usual.
>> Yes.
>> I think that we ought to come up. You know, those stress balls.
>> I'm I'm ending the stream. We need to come.
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