To effectively change someone's behavior or increase the likelihood of them doing something, notice and appreciate their good actions rather than focusing on their mistakes; when people feel valued for what they do well, they become more motivated to improve and repeat positive behaviors, whereas criticism often leads to disengagement and reduced effort.
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Why Criticism Often Makes Behaviour Worse追加:
You looking to change somebody's behavior or you're looking to increase [music] the likelihood of somebody doing something. Don't catch them being bad.
Notice them being good. So, if your partner cleans your kitchen for you and you go in and go, "Well, you haven't done that bit. You haven't done that bit." Well, they'll never try and clean that kitchen for you ever again. Didn't appreciate anything they did do. If instead you went in there and found the one bit you really did like, we'd actually find we'd get a significant improvement. They'd try and make the most rest of kitchen hopefully look like [music] that.
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