Stop Assuming the Worst—This Is What Actually Went On

Hinzugefügt: 2026-04-30

[00:00:00]The response to this video was really interesting. I had a lot of people tell me that I'm rude, that I'm opportunistic, that I'm taking advantage. And what really stood out to me was the way that people fill in the gaps. So many assumptions made about who this person is, about what they do, about what the dynamic is. And then conclusions were drawn from that without asking any questions. And for context, this video was about my stepdad. He is not a handyman professionally. So what we're looking at is how quickly we build a story and make a moral judgment based on it. But even outside of that, there is something even more important being missed. He can say no. I told him many times that it's safe to say no, that there is no consequence to saying no.

[00:00:42]And he still chooses to say yes. But instead of looking at that, the responsibility was being placed back on me for asking. You can't fix somebody's inability to say no by managing the situation for them. I value autonomy, which means I respect people enough to let them choose, even if that means they say no. You don't build better boundaries by removing the moment where somebody has to use them. Absolutely everything I teach is rooted in self-responsibility, which means people are responsible for the choices they make, including saying yes or saying no.