I Don’t Even Know What’s Happening Anymore In *EUPHORIA* (3X5)

Added: 2026-05-23

[00:00:00]This little piggy.

[00:00:02]This little piggy what? Oh, piggy. We're talking about these toes. Hello everybody. We're back for more Euphoria this week. Episode 5 called This Little Piggy. I hope you went back and watched all my other Euphoria reactions.

[00:00:16]I hope so. Okay, so last week, I don't know if it's an unpopular opinion, but I enjoyed last week's episode aside from certain things.

[00:00:24]It actually kind of felt a little bit like old Euphoria. I don't know if anybody else feels like that, but to me it did. Cass left Nate, you know, because he's $1 million in debt. So, Cass said, "I'm out. My ride's here. I'm leaving." She's going wherever the wind takes her. So, she is working with Maddy now, like you know, getting into the industry and everything like that, the only fans stuff. I just want to get into the episode. So, let's just do that.

[00:00:54]She would never say it out loud.

[00:00:56]>> [screaming] >> Nate going broke.

[00:01:01]finally granted Cassie the permission to follow her dreams.

[00:01:04]The toes spinning. This little piggy went to the market.

[00:01:09]Oh, I should have known. I was talking about Nate's toes.

[00:01:14]This little piggy had none. She had 17,000 new subscribers. Well, [ __ ] Yes. Maddy worked her to the bone. I want to see more ass. As you should, Maddy.

[00:01:31]Not Maddy being in the room for that.

[00:01:35]Oh my gosh, we get it. You have boobs.

[00:01:38]Do you want to hear my word say?

[00:01:42]No, thanks. I'm not going to fart in a jar for $700.

[00:01:46]You fart in the jars. Okay.

[00:01:50]>> [laughter] >> Oh, guess you just hit 50,000 subscribers.

[00:01:55]>> [screaming] >> Damn, 50,000 already? Maddy helped her to get even more exposure. No, Maddie knows what the [ __ ] she's doing. Well, in the past, men used to be a hunter.

[00:02:06]>> Oh.

[00:02:08]Trisha.

[00:02:09]If a man today were to say that he wants a girlfriend that can cook or clean, he might as well be screaming the N-word.

[00:02:15]Okay.

[00:02:16]What?

[00:02:17]Well, you sound like a Democrat.

[00:02:19]I'm not [ __ ] Yo, what? Even with all the attention she was getting, she still missed Nate.

[00:02:27]I don't want to hear about that [ __ ] I think you need to take that big sweetheart of yours and stick it in the [ __ ] freezer. Mhm.

[00:02:35]Clock it.

[00:02:36]>> He's not a breadwinner.

[00:02:38]He's a bread loser. Literally.

[00:02:41]Literally. Your career is about to [ __ ] explode. She was getting bigger.

[00:02:51]Where is that going?

[00:02:53]I Oh my Okay. You know what? I think I'm good.

[00:02:57]I think I'm good.

[00:02:59]The hell?

[00:03:02]What am I watching right now?

[00:03:04]Explanation now.

[00:03:06]Wait, what are we doing?

[00:03:10]What?

[00:03:11]What is going on right now?

[00:03:13]What is going on right now?

[00:03:15]Hi, Frank. Hi.

[00:03:17]Frank, I don't need your POV.

[00:03:19]Yo, this is so [ __ ] weird. We're I'm so good off of this.

[00:03:30]I'm seeing Sydney's boobs more than I'm seeing my own, [ __ ] That's enough.

[00:03:34]Like, we're just We're just doing anything this episode, huh? She had finally been unleashed.

[00:03:41]Sure. I literally have no comment.

[00:03:46]Okay. 15 years, now he [ __ ] decides to betray me. They are shooting.

[00:03:51]Man, the [ __ ] was scared to die. Also, he's okay. Business is in the hands of that Dracula face and a crew of moronic [ __ ] crackers. Jesus. They got guns, too. Excuse me.

[00:04:03]>> And we have the element of surprise. Ew.

[00:04:05]The [ __ ] do you got on, [ __ ] Sorry.

[00:04:09]I'm 6'3. Oh.

[00:04:11]>> passive a [ __ ] as 5'9. He's so cute. Oh my gosh, he's such a cutie but he's not Alano. I don't know what his name is, but he's such a cutie. These pants are the pants of a [ __ ] man of Okay, then change the pants. Like he he drags it.

[00:04:24]>> Is this what you think of me? Oh my gosh, don't hurt him. He's too cute.

[00:04:28]Don't hurt him.

[00:04:30]Who the shot?

[00:04:31]You think I'm not the size I am?

[00:04:34]Like doing too much.

[00:04:38]>> [screaming] >> Oh.

[00:04:43]Oh my gosh. Just made him pee his pants.

[00:04:47]How are we just going to move on from that that quickly? Oh my gosh. Yo, you know Maddie's not a real manager, right?

[00:04:53]What?

[00:04:54]Cast, what are you doing?

[00:04:55]>> Assistant to a manager. Like bulldogging and now there's diarrhea.

[00:04:59]Ooh, let's look, [ __ ] You look so good. Gorgeous.

[00:05:05]Ew.

[00:05:06]You know that porn star you used to represent? She's making a fortune.

[00:05:12]Yeah, we're aware. I do make a lot of money. Cuz I've been tagging you and [ __ ] Well, also because people want to see her, but you know, sure. She's just another Hollywood [ __ ] Wow.

[00:05:24]Don't be talking about Maddie like that.

[00:05:26]Professional videographers, editors, photographers. Think of what we could build together. What is this, a content house?

[00:05:33]No, we have our own place, so I'm not sure we need to.

[00:05:37]We're good.

[00:05:39]And a beautiful view.

[00:05:41]If I can't convince you, maybe the fans can. Okay, well, use your brain, Cast.

[00:05:46]It'll to tasteful. One is not there?

[00:05:49]Good.

[00:05:51]I see a whole lot of mess. It's like you're pretending to be in a relationship.

[00:05:54]>> Wouldn't that make you jealous? Yeah.

[00:05:57]Why I have to talk to Maddie first.

[00:05:58]>> Oh, Maddie. But this guy can take you places. I'm really counting on you, babe. Yeah, because you need the money.

[00:06:06]Look at this.

[00:06:08]Ugh. I love you. I love you. I love you.

[00:06:11]You owe me that money as soon as you can.

[00:06:14]>> He's like, yeah, you can give me the money. Bam. That's Bonnie and Clyde, baby. That's Jay-Z and Beyoncé.

[00:06:21]No.

[00:06:22]Don't ever.

[00:06:24]Nathaniel, don't ever. Bonnie and Clyde, sure, go ahead, cuz you know how that ended, but >> [laughter] >> don't. Mhm.

[00:06:35]Alamo had asked to see me alone.

[00:06:37]How are they trying to make it seem like being with the racist ass people was better than being here with that like how are they trying to make it seem like that in the show right now? Cuz that's the vibe that I'm getting. They're trying to make it seem like being with Lori's people was better. Because look at what man's suiting up to do something. I don't even know, but that it can't be good.

[00:06:55]The first nice you come around, then the cascade of trouble.

[00:07:03]Something about you gives me the heebie-jeebies.

[00:07:08]The heebie-jeebies? No, something about you gives me the heebie-jeebies because why are you so calm and like monotone?

[00:07:16]Ooh, hi. Who's this?

[00:07:22]That was the security. The bouncer, no?

[00:07:24]How's that his fault? Oh my gosh, he let them in. Okay.

[00:07:29]Rip. Okay, so that whole like thing circulating that that um Bishop is like working with the DEA or whatever, he's like an undercover cop or something, that can go out the window cuz he's about to torture that man. She She to meet.

[00:07:41]I am. About what? She didn't say.

[00:07:44]I got a good feeling about what she wants. What?

[00:07:47]>> For me to bend over and spread my ass.

[00:07:52]What? But I'mma spread hers.

[00:07:55]Ew, excuse me. My [ __ ] [clears throat] got a whole lot [ __ ] more valuable than money.

[00:08:01]Okay, what did they take? This is ain't nobody's monkey.

[00:08:11]Okay. [snorts] I like those pillows. Those are really nice. Where the [ __ ] are you put What is that? A a I don't even know what that is. What is that? A trumpet? I don't know. How do you even know how to play that?

[00:08:23]He just pisses me off every time I see him.

[00:08:28]Oh, [ __ ] That's why they have the pigs.

[00:08:31]That makes sense.

[00:08:33]That That makes sense cuz pigs do eat anything.

[00:08:36]I told the DEA that Lori wanted to set up a meeting with Alamo. Mhm. Look, just getting to the room with your phone out.

[00:08:43]Like what?

[00:08:45]Y'all should be able to give me some better advice than that or instructions than that. You should know.

[00:08:51]>> They needed me to get her to incriminate herself.

[00:08:54]She's calling to let you know that I had nothing to do with Paladin. I didn't think he was going to kill him.

[00:08:59]I don't ever want to talk to you again.

[00:09:02]Oh, [ __ ] Y'all really only have Rue to help you get these people? Are you Are you kidding me? Rue can't be the only one to to put this [ __ ] together. Like that's crazy.

[00:09:15]I'mma bet you wish you still had your drug mule. Every [ __ ] day, man. Too bad. Jaws been filled.

[00:09:21]By?

[00:09:22]When you locked to know Okay. By who? Panthers office, Maddie speaking. So, Brandon wasn't telling the truth. You're just an assistant. An assistant who's helping you get that bag. So, I don't know what we're we're doing.

[00:09:41]So, is she going to be moving into that house? So, you were lying about living in a dormant building.

[00:09:48]You caught me. I'm sensitive to lies.

[00:09:53][ __ ] I just need you to know that it's not personal, it's just business.

[00:09:58]Okay, I got to see. Basically, Brandon made me an offer I can't refuse. Well, go ahead then, say it.

[00:10:05]Well, she still had that picture? But you're my best friend.

[00:10:08]Was. This is a big opportunity for me.

[00:10:12]I just feel like we were doing pretty we were fine with Maddie. And I have to move on.

[00:10:18]Okay.

[00:10:20]Said, "Yeah, okay, sure." So, I'm calling about the LA Knights audition with Cassie. Oh.

[00:10:26]I'm going to have to cancel that.

[00:10:28]Maddie.

[00:10:30]Yeah. Wait, wait, wait, what? No, I don't represent you. Exactly. You just said that you got to move on. Didn't you just leave me? No, no. What a good move, Maddie.

[00:10:41]I drew up a contract.

[00:10:42]Mhm.

[00:10:44]Sign that [ __ ] So, I need proof of this [ __ ] Mhm.

[00:10:54]Maddie hadn't secured an audition. Well, duh.

[00:10:57]>> [laughter] >> Call the casting director, put Cassie on the list. Do it, Lex, even though I know you just got in trouble, so. But still, do it.

[00:11:07]Ooh, I like this shirt. It's giving like Tiffany Stratton. Tiffany Stratton again, you guys know WWE?

[00:11:13]Tiffy time. They'd love to be besties.

[00:11:17]I'll be doing a monologue from Anthony and Cleopatra by William Shakespeare.

[00:11:25]Okay.

[00:11:27]I mean, it doesn't look like she's doing too bad. Blow me into a pouring.

[00:11:31]Okay, do we like it or not? Like I don't know.

[00:11:34]That's your sister.

[00:11:36]Yeah.

[00:11:37]>> If she can do Shakespeare, she can do whatever she wants.

[00:11:41]Oh, [ __ ] Well, that means it's good? Girl, I don't know. I guess so, good enough. Who was your most recent?

[00:11:53]Angel. She was passionate though.

[00:11:56]It's mostly us. So you two are in love?

[00:11:59]Definitely.

[00:12:00]Okay. She's trying to make you jealous.

[00:12:04]Who eats like that, Jules? What do you want?

[00:12:08]Loki to be with you, that's what you want. So you want to just me, but you won't out of respect? I'm not sure respect was in the question, like the other time when she was here, so Make me yours. Oh.

[00:12:24]>> [gasps] >> Oh my goodness. Wow.

[00:12:30]Oh. Oh.

[00:12:34]That's not what I thought was going to be happening. I thought it was real.

[00:12:38]Bring guys to my apartment and [ __ ] them when I'm not here. Who's RB?

[00:12:43]Rue. Rue, she's not a guy. I got a wife.

[00:12:45]I cannot be coming home with a [ __ ] STD.

[00:12:49]Okay.

[00:12:50]I like you, but I love my family.

[00:12:54]Oh.

[00:12:57]Where are Jules?

[00:12:58]We could have just been doing art stuff, you know, not being a sugar baby. Cassie wired Nate 30 grand.

[00:13:05]Nate had missed his last payment.

[00:13:07]>> This is just exactly what I would have expected for his his life to be after high school. Just not in like a huge house, just like in the basement or something, you know?

[00:13:19]Oh gosh. Ooh, you not about to be that happy for a minute longer. Wait, this is really nice. You have people driving around in golf carts in your neighborhood?

[00:13:27]He's supposed to get beat the [ __ ] up again.

[00:13:31]God, don't break the glass, please.

[00:13:33]Okay, sure.

[00:13:38]I was going to call the [ __ ] Whack.

[00:13:43]Right in the face.

[00:13:45]Ooh.

[00:13:49]We're losing the pinky finger now?

[00:13:51]>> [screaming] [groaning] >> Why did it come off so easily? Now Now he No pinky toe, no pinky finger.

[00:14:03]When did this turn into a [ __ ] horror movie?

[00:14:07]Keep biking, kiddo.

[00:14:10]Yeah.

[00:14:11]Sort of forgot that I frame magic.

[00:14:14]Oh, yeah.

[00:14:16]Well, you almost outed us, [ __ ] So.

[00:14:19]Better figure out how to Rue, put it there for sure. I know for fact that you cannot trust this [ __ ] God. The the gunman, they do a lot of talking. Claro, they were talking so much.

[00:14:31]with the [ __ ] Didn't you say Rue lived with those crackers? And she didn't recognize their voices.

[00:14:40]Like I forgive her and then she just immediately [ __ ] you over again. Like when you look at her in the eye, you don't just like Yeah.

[00:14:49]Not even a little bit? That not Well, maybe cuz it's been a little bit of time, but for me girl, we had to mop her again just because I reached a state of pure harmony.

[00:15:00]Girl, what frequency are you are you are you on because I need to get there, too?

[00:15:07]Hello.

[00:15:08]No, we're with Maddie right now.

[00:15:15]Oh my god.

[00:15:17]I do not want him anywhere around Maddie. Rue, did Ben have Wow, I never realized what the the thing was. I thought it was like a bull or something.

[00:15:29]Maddy Perez >> [laughter] >> I've not tried anything.

[00:15:35]What to do this with Maddy here? Maddy knows some shit's like off. Ruth seems to believe that God sent her. God or the devil. It was definitely the devil, [ __ ] Like it was him.

[00:15:46]>> Didn't have the fortune of growing up in a safe place like Ruth, nice suburban street.

[00:15:52]Cute little house. Excuse me?

[00:15:55]Do you know where my family lives? I'm so anxious right now. Like please can we move on from this, please? Next scene.

[00:16:01]Sounds good. What, Bishop? What?

[00:16:05]I'll give you a ride.

[00:16:07]Where are we going?

[00:16:08]Uh don't you have somewhere to go, Maddy?

[00:16:11]No.

[00:16:12]Maddy.

[00:16:13]Yeah, go somewhere. I'll keep Maddy company.

[00:16:17]What kind of milkshake you get your?

[00:16:19]What like I don't want to talk to you.

[00:16:23]>> Oreo?

[00:16:24]Oreo milkshake, mhm.

[00:16:26]Yum.

[00:16:31]And y'all got to hear me out. He's fine as [ __ ] too. I What's his name, G?

[00:16:38]Mhm.

[00:16:39]Like I need to know who this doctor is.

[00:16:41]Mhm. We can go to another place.

[00:16:44]All right.

[00:16:46]I manage anybody who wants to make money.

[00:16:48]Too caught up in being honest, good people.

[00:16:51]>> Mhm.

[00:16:52]I'm not. Maddy, I really just like this is scaring me. Okay, Elam. What are we getting into here? We're not going to be like intertwining like Maddy's skills with his business and whatever, right? Please don't. Let me see your phone.

[00:17:07]Why?

[00:17:10]Oh, here you go. My god, what are we doing?

[00:17:14]My top girl, Cassie, she could be bringing in a million a month. Okay, then. Yep.

[00:17:21]Now we got like our people involved with him. Like he should not know Maddie or Cass. Then if I'm your friend, you get 15 and I get 15. Well, I'd like to see your inventory first. You might have some busted ass girls in there.

[00:17:35]Maddie.

[00:17:36]You used your maiden name and you said I personally recommended you.

[00:17:40]>> Wanted to make sure that it got seen.

[00:17:41]Well, it definitely got [ __ ] seen.

[00:17:43]Congratulations, job well What can you got the [ __ ] part. But like you don't want her to work there? I'm not even going to be able to walk down the street. Lexis not want to hear this [ __ ] You were literally the most selfish, narcissistic person I have ever met.

[00:17:59]Mhm, very true Lex.

[00:18:09]I know we're we're not about to do what I think we're about to do. Start digging.

[00:18:14]Digging what? Your own grave, Roo.

[00:18:17]Baby, why are you still there? He just made you pee your pants in front of everybody. Why are you still there?

[00:18:22]Go somewhere else.

[00:18:24]So you're real close then.

[00:18:27]Yeah. So you trust her?

[00:18:30]I do.

[00:18:31]She's a little crazy, but she has a good heart.

[00:18:35]And you have your people [ __ ] making her dig her own grave right now. Like oh my god. See and then I think in another episode I was like Maddie's going to become a stripper or something, but no.

[00:18:43]I I had the feeling that she was going to be involved in this somehow though.

[00:18:47]Cuz I definitely did say like she was going to be a stripper or something, but she's just going to be digging in the pond, you know, getting more clients, I guess.

[00:18:56]Yeah, help me out here.

[00:18:57]>> [panting] [sighs] >> No, baby, you haven't caught on yet.

[00:19:03]Hey, [crying] hey, hey.

[00:19:05]Roo, you got That's so [ __ ] Insurance fraud?

[00:19:14]You know you could have Take seven and 15. Kitty.

[00:19:19]Maddy.

[00:19:20]Come on over here.

[00:19:21]Kitty and Maddy?

[00:19:25]Damn.

[00:19:27]Can we go back to Rue? Like is Rue okay?

[00:19:30]I don't know what I did to deserve this.

[00:19:35]Oh my god.

[00:19:37]And then here comes this man. Oh my goodness. I'm done. I'm so done.

[00:19:44]Wait. Wait. What?

[00:19:46]Hey, yo. What the hell?

[00:19:49]>> [screaming] >> Bro, and we're going to end up still there?

[00:20:01]Okay, I just I just can't believe that we literally have Maddy and Alamo in like the same vicinity. Like I don't like it. I don't I don't like it. I just I don't see it ending well.

[00:20:15]Like bro, I know that she's just trying to I'm just so frightened for Maddy. I'm just so scared. Like you know Rue Rue I was I was scared for Rue too, but you know she got herself into this mess.

[00:20:29]Like I just I can't. But [snorts] Maddy, please stay the [ __ ] away from Maddy.

[00:20:34]Okay, the opening of this episode I was not feeling it. Like what are what are we doing? What exactly are we doing?

[00:20:40]Because I don't need to be seeing that much of Sydney all the time.

[00:20:45]I don't need to be seeing that much of her of her girls all the time. Like I'm good. I'm so good. I think like we just like Sydney say no next time. Like it's okay. You you have that freedom. You're allowed to say no.

[00:20:59]Okay, she's going to be on the the little TV show that um Lexi works on. Lexi just literally hates her life right now because like what the hell?

[00:21:09]All this this is happening her sister whatever she just hates all of it honestly and I don't blame Lexi. Yeah that ending scene okay we'll get to the ending scene with Rue my goodness my poor girl.

[00:21:20]Like if you think you're having a bad day Rue is just she's beating you every single time like she is beating you every single time.

[00:21:31]>> [laughter] >> I was just thinking about Nate um okay.

[00:21:35]Nate Nathaniel Nate [music] one why you know we did lose our toe in that house right?

[00:21:46]We did lose our toe in that house and the fact that he just ended up staying there knowing knowing that they know where he's at where that they could find him again you know just whenever.

[00:22:00]You think that he'd leave but no he's still there and and you're thinking he's gone again your pinky toe's gone and now you lost a finger.

[00:22:09]Tough.

[00:22:11]Tough. We're on episode five like we have a what three episodes left? Dude I really don't know what to expect for the end of the season because I don't know if like the kind of feels like a little stagnant with Rue's like positioning with the DEA stuff like I don't know I don't really know like how that's going to end especially because Lori said that she doesn't want to talk to Rue so like neither of them nobody in that house seems like they want to do anything with Rue so I'm not sure how we're the DEA is going to get their their end game there and then of course the the ending the ending with Rue Rue.

[00:22:52]I just I just hope her face is still intact like I hope she's good like that is some crazy like next level stuff like that I just thought that they were going to like leave her there for like the night or something, you know?

[00:23:06]Something crazy. Like that's still crazy. But to run up with what's what's that sport?

[00:23:12]Polo?

[00:23:17]Help Rue, please.

[00:23:19]Please, Rue, you better be praying.

[00:23:22]You better be praying.

[00:23:23]You better hope God's going to get you out of that one cuz holy. I still think that episode 4 was like my favorite out of what we've seen so far. I definitely did like episode 4, but this one wasn't bad.

[00:23:34]Um I hope you guys enjoyed the video.

[00:23:36]Thank you for sticking around and watching. If you're interested, if you're not, that's okay. But the full episode reaction, no sick required, will be on Patreon. Like always, all links are left down in the description box below along with my Discord and my socials. So, if you want to get in there, actually you should get in there.

[00:23:54]Get in the Discord. Get in the Discord.

[00:23:56]Get in the Patreon. You know, interact with me on socials.

[00:24:01]Do it.

[00:24:02]Cuz I like interacting with you guys.

[00:24:05]But any who, I will see you guys in the next one.

[00:24:08]Huh.

[00:24:09]I can't believe we're almost done, honestly. That That [ __ ] went by quick.

[00:24:13]See you guys in the next one. Take care.

[00:24:18]All that stuff.

[00:24:20]Bye.

[00:24:22]>> [music] [music]