Setting personal boundaries often results in losing people who were only staying because you were available to them, and this loss is a real grief that requires honest acknowledgment and grieving; those who leave when you set boundaries were never truly staying for you, while those who are meant to be in your life will adjust and respect your boundaries even if they don't love them.
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The truth about setting boundaries.Ajouté :
Nobody tells you that setting boundaries is going to cost you people.
>> [music] >> Real people. People you love.
People you thought would show up for you no matter [music] what. Because the moment you stop being who everyone needed you to be, the moment you say [music] this is okay and this is not, some people are going to leave.
Not because you did something wrong, but because your boundary got in the way of what they needed from you. And that loss is real.
I want to be honest about that. Because a lot of healing spaces make boundaries sound [music] clean and empowering and straightforward.
And sometimes they are.
But sometimes the boundary is grief.
A quiet acknowledgement that the relationship you thought you had was conditional on you having none. That's not a reason to stop setting them.
It's a reason to be honest about what [music] they cost.
To let yourself grieve the people who couldn't stay when you finally chose yourself.
>> [music] >> To stop pretending that growth is always comfortable for everyone around [music] you. And the people who are meant to be in your life will adjust.
They'll respect the boundary [music] even if they don't love it.
They'll stay even when you change. The ones who leave when you [music] set a boundary were never really staying for you.
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